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thinking about that one moment when I was about to get top surgery

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viewing queer identities as “this is the label that makes me happy and feels most accurate now” rather than “this is who I am, was, and always will be” will definitely take the pressure off, friends. changing your mind is proof that you have one.

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I just saw a post talking about how trans men are made to feel hated and misgendered by "fuck men" and "men dni" sentiments and I didn't want to derail it but it did start me thinking about how I, as a trans woman, am made to feel by those sorts of sentiments.

I'm worried that I'll join a "woman only" space and not be seen as one. I don't pass as a woman but I am one. Do I fall inside or outside of their category for what a "woman" is.

I still get nervous when I hear people talking about how much they hate men because not only did do I still look and sound like a man, I used to be a man and I'm not suddenly a different person because I've transitioned. All the hate they spew used to be directed at me so why would they stop now?

I don't know I'm not someone who can well articulate these sorts of things or talk about these issues but I always feel uncomfortable when peeople say those types of things around me and I feel like other trans women might as well

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i love lesbians. i went to get drinks with a masc who had sent me pictures of her hanging drywall. she confirmed over text that she was sending these to torture me. in person, she was so nervous her hands were trembling. she had to repeat her order twice because she was so quiet. she shakily asked for a hug at the end of the night, the way oliver twist asks for porridge. and then i got home and she sent me a picture of her just in a toolbelt, accompanied by one of the smuttiest text messages i've ever read. meanwhile when i called her to schedule the next date, she had to stop and say, "i'm so sorry i'm so nervous i'm out of breath." just. the whiplash of it all. godbless you every lesbian

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i simply don't think nonbinary people should have to see having our gender/s respected and acknowledged as a luxury. i think it's frankly sickening that that's the state of things tbh.

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They removed bisexuals from the stonewall monument website. How long until the website is just “stonewall is something that happened. I guess” because they cut every group out.

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🧵 THREAD: This #PrideMonth, don’t forget that the fight for queer liberation didn’t start or end with marriage equality.

💪✨ We need to keep fighting for our rights.

Here’s are a few examples:

💋 Before the 2003 Supreme Court ruling in Lawrence v. Texas, same-smex smexual activity was illegal in fourteen U.S. states, Puerto Rico, and the U.S. military

👶 Before 2015, LGBTQ+ couples couldn’t adopt in all 50 states. Before the Supreme Court ruling in Obergefell v. Hodges, laws varied wildly by state.

🏳️‍🌈 Before 1973, the American Psychiatric Association listed homosmexuality as a ‘mental illness.’ In December 1973, a vote was successfully held to remove it.

🗳️ Before 1974, there were no openly gay elected officials. That changed with Kathy Kozachenko, who became the first openly gay American elected to public office in Ann Arbor, Michigan.

🎖️ Before 2011, “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” banned LGBTQ+ people from serving openly in the military.

💍 Before 2015, LGBTQ+ couples couldn’t get married in all 50 states. At the time, laws varied by state, and while many states allowed for civil unions for same-sex couples, it created a separate but equal standard.

💼 Before 2020, employers could legally discriminate against queer and trans employees. It wasn’t until the U.S. Supreme Court held that an employer who fires or otherwise discriminates against an individual simply for being gay or transgender is in violation of Title VII of the Civil Rights Act of 1964.

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my elder latina coworker (same one who showed me that song) was speaking with me on a lunch break today and said "there is nothing wrong with you; if you dove into the water, it would hold your body the same way that it holds anyone else's."

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telling starving tgirls who complain about no hrt gains to "eat like a teenager" is slightly incorrect; in a sense, she already is eating exactly like a teenage girl. tell her to eat like a healthy teenager

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crazy that they accidentally stumbled on their thesis real early on

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(TW: Sex, masturbation)

My dear lgbt+ kids,

Our language surrounding the topic of "becoming sexually active" often makes it sound like you become less after you start having sex:

Someone takes your virginity. You lose your innocence. You are no longer pure.

This is not what happens. If someone starts to have sex, they don't lose something - they gain something.

No matter if we are talking about masturbation or sex with a partner: They just add a new activity to their life. A new experience, new knowledge about their body, a new way to make their body feel good - and in the case of sex with a partner, a new way to feel close to their partner, a new way to experience intimacy.

(For some people, the thing they gain will be the knowledge that they do not enjoy sex/masturbation and that's valuable, too! Knowing yourself and what you like/dislike is a gain, not a loss.)

Don't twist my words here: I'm not telling young people who don't feel ready for sex yet (or people who already know they'd dislike it without trying it) to rush into something they are not ready/willing to do. That's very much not the point of this letter!

Respecting your own boundaries and waiting until you are truly ready is a great thing. I just want to re-frame the conversation around sex: You are not waiting because you need to prevent any tragic loss. You are just waiting until you are ready.

Sex and masturbation shouldn't be associated with loss. It doesn't take away part of you. It doesn't make you less - adding a new activity to your life can not make you any less good, less pure, less sweet, less of a whole person. It's just a new thing you do. You gain something, you don't lose anything.

With all my love,

Your Tumblr Dad

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the top one is the recent one, i just wanted a little collection of "parents can support their trans kids and no one went on fire or died"

and one for siblings:

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I know that HRT gives you secondary sex characteristics in one direction or another, but we HAVE to stop telling nonbinary people that they “can’t pick and choose.” Of course, you can’t tell your testosterone that you’d rather not grow chest hair, but there are things you can do!

You could go on T so your voice drops and start shaving so you don’t grow a beard. You could start HRT and then stop once you get the permanent changes you like. You can pursue sterilization instead of bottom surgery. You can get top surgery without being on T. You can go on E and work out a bunch to bulk out your muscles. You can pursue laser hair removal or electrolysis to remove unwanted hair, with or without HRT. You could even just start hormones to see if you like it and then stop if it isn’t to your taste.

Obviously, you can’t order secondary sex characteristics a la carte, but we have to stop being so awful to nonbinary people. We should discuss the options we have, not shut down the conversation with “that’s what you get.”

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SAME SEX MARRIAGE FOR ITALY

Hey italiani!! There's an official ministry of justice referendum to get same sex couples the same rights as heterosexual couple in being actually married and not just "uniti civilmente". This will grant them the same rights in adoption and stepchild adoption.

Of course the big news arent talking about it so the only way to let it circulate is through spreading the info ourselves.

It needs 500k signatures in 3 months and while that alone will not automatically grant equal rights it will be a HUUUGE step forward in italy, lately quite discriminatory politic.

Here's the link to the referendum! Se siete italiani e potete entrare con lo SPID firmate!

If you're not italian, please spread the word as it might reach someone that can sign!

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Fave Five: New Polyamorous Fiction, 2025 Edition

Muted by Miranda Mundt (Fantasy GN) Lasso Lovebirds by Clio Evans (Romance Novella) Rebel in the Deep by Katee Robert (Fantasy) Middle Spoon by Alejandro Varela (Litfic) Party of Three by C. Travis Rice (Romance Novella) Bonus: These are all Adult, but in YA Fantasy, check out Tenderly, I Am Devoured by Lyndall Clipstone

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So I've got this friend whose nervous because she's trans and dating this guy who she hasn't told yet because they've only been on a two dates. For this story let's call the friend Jane and the guy she was dating Jason. Happy ending don't worry. So I tell Jane to bring her boy over to a bbq I'm having and she can tell him she's trans at my place surrounded by queer and trans people who love her and will support her if he ends up being awful. She waits till the end of the bbq to tell him the news, by which point the rest of us have learned that Jason is a kind, friendly, empathetic, hard working, dummy. So we sit down, all of us a little worried about this gym bro's reaction when she tells him she's trans, and that she understands if he doesn't want to keep dating her it's no big deal. He's baffled, so we explain what trans is, and after the disclosure that she hasn't had bottom surgery yet... "Oh you have a dick?" "... yeah." He look's around at the room full of people with baited breath, his clearly a little afraid girl friend says "Oooohhhh! I get it! You think- don't worry Babe! Watch this!"

And ya'll this man jumps up, runs into the kitchen and returns with one of the bratwurst we had for grilling and proceeds to tilt his head back, put it down his throat, hold it in his mouth for a moment, and spit it up without even a whisper of a gag and then looks around at the group absolutely beaming with pride. My mans saw his worried girlfriend and her support network and thought to him self "Oh they don't think I can please my girl but I'll show them!"

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“I wish I could be a boy” You can

“I wish I could penetrate but I don’t have a penis” There’s a surgery for that

“I want to piss standing up” The surgery does that too, but also have you heard of an STP device? You should look into those

“I like the effects testosterone could give me but what if people think I’m ugly after I start” would you rather be happy and ugly or beautiful and miserable

“I want to cut my hair short and look more like a guy but everyone is begging me to not cut my hair” bestie, it’s your hair and they can go fuck themselves

“I wish I was born a boy” The best time to plant a tree was ten years ago, the second best time is today

“I wish I was a boy” I have great news for you