caffeineandfiction - Tumblr blog

[caffeineandfiction]

&. 𝐣𝐨𝐣𝐢 𝐥𝐲𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐬 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬.

(  lyric  sentence  starters  taken  from  various  joji  songs.  free  to  change  how  you  seem  fit.  )

❛ will your tongue still remember the taste of my lips? ❜

❛ will your lover caress you the way, that i did? ❜

❛ i just wanna make sure you’re okay. ❜

❛ i thought we’d last forever. ❜

❛ the demons told me everything. they whisper in the night. ❜

❛ you don’t know me, what the fuck you mean? ❜

❛ i’m a bitter fuck. ❜

❛ i don’t wanna live in my skin no more. ❜

❛ i won’t fuck with you if you don’t fuck with me. ❜

❛ so tell me, am i crazy? ❜

❛ i don’t wanna waste my time if i can’t be by your side. ❜

❛ you’re only on my mind when i need you. ❜

❛ i promise you my heart is made of gold. ❜

❛ would it kill you just to throw a little bit of attention? ❜

❛ would you hate me if i said goodbye? ❜

❛ i don’t smile for the camera, only smile for you. ❜

❛ don’t follow me, you’ll end up in my arms. ❜

❛ you should be with him, i can’t compete. ❜

❛ i’ll see you in the next life. ❜

❛ i promise i won’t lie, we’ll make it out alive. ❜

❛ so punish me, i’m hanging on your noose. ❜

❛ so pull me up so i can breathe with you. ❜

❛ i can’t get over you. ❜

❛ teach me to love just to let me go. ❜

❛ but right now i’m just not strong enough for you. ❜

❛ i don’t feel the way they programmed me to feel today. ❜

❛ you and i, we are one in the same. ❜

❛ i wish you were here with me now. ❜

❛ right now, laying here alone is heaven. ❜

❛ i just need you one more time to get it right, you know. ❜

❛ i fell for your magic, i tasted your skin. ❜

❛ i know you’re not in love like you used to be. ❜

❛ when night falls i am your escape. ❜

❛ when you lay alone, i ache. ❜

❛ if you’ve been waiting for falling in love, you don’t have to wait on me. ❜

❛ i’ve been aiming for heaven above, but an angel ain’t what i need. ❜

❛ not anyone, you’re the one. ❜

❛ what you want is what i want, sincerity. ❜

❛ hold me close cause you never know just how long our lives will be. ❜

❛ there’s something in your laugh that makes me fear the way you smile. ❜

❛ we can pretend we’re normal people. ❜

❛ we don’t gotta love each other right, we just gotta make it through the night. ❜

❛ by the way you move, i know you want me to. ❜

❛ if you ever go, all the songs that we like will sound like bittersweet lullabies. ❜

❛ those chills that i knew, they were nothing without you. ❜

❛ you’re the one i can’t lose. ❜

❛ no one loves me like you do. ❜

❛ since i met you, all the gloomy days just seem to shine a little more brightly. ❜

❛ have you ever loved? would you go again? ❜

[caffeineandfiction]

मेरे कमरे को सजाने की तमन्ना है तुम्हें

मेरे कमरे में किताबों के सिवा कुछ भी नहीं

- jaun eliya ki nazmon se

[caffeineandfiction]

I am a mosaic of everyone I have ever known and loved and touched and I find fragments of them in my playlists and how I make my tea. we may not know each other any more but we will stay connected like this. I hope a fragment of me is with you too.

[caffeineandfiction]

عندما يقولون كل شيء مكتوب ، أدعو الله أن يكتب اسمك بجانب اسمي.

When they say everything is written, I pray that your name is written next to mine.

[caffeineandfiction]

The Language Of Flowers

Acacia: Hidden love, beauty in withdrawal

Amaryllis: Pride, a hard won success

Anemone: Vanishing hopes

Bells of Ireland: Wish for good luck

Carnation: Fascination, love and distinction

Daffodil (Narcissus): Honesty and truth

Dahlia flower: Warnings and change

Daisy: Innocence, loyal love and purity

Delphinium: Open heart, ardent attachement

Gardenia: Symbol of secret love

Gladiolus: Remembrance, faithfulness and sincerity

Hyacinth: I'm sorry, please forgive me.

Iris: Eloquence

Lily (general) : Purity of the heart and refined beauty

Lily of the valley: Return of happiness

Marigold: Passion and creativity

Orchid: Beauty, refinement and love

Peony: Happy marriage

Lavender: Love at first sight

Red rose: Love, respect, courage and passion

White rose: Purity, secrecy, silence, innocence and charm

Sunflower: Good luck and ambition

Tulip: Irresistible love

Violet: Faithfulness, modesty and delicate love

Zinnia: Lasting affection, daily remembrance and good memories

[caffeineandfiction]

No cause Ali Sethi had no right to be like

Mere Dhol Judaiyaan Di Tenu Khabar Kiwein Hove

My love how can you know what happens when we part

Aa Jaave Dil Tera Poora Vi Na Hove

I hope you fall in love, I hope it breaks your heart

[caffeineandfiction]

05/03/2022 Saturday 4:35 AM You cannot love me just a little more to stay Dil bharta nahi Aankhen rajjti nahi Chaahe kitna bhi dekhti jaaun Waqt jaaye main rok na paaun It's been ages since I’ve missed you like so, but don’t for once think; that I’ve forgotten about you. You’ve always been the person I could never get enough of. The time spent with you was never enough, I was selfish you see; wanted all of you to myself. The way I looked at you, sun on your face; and wanted nothing more than to burn with you. There was nothing sweeter than this for me. Even though I knew it would hurt when you would have to go. It was like handing over the knife to my killer itself and expecting to walk away; unharmed. You, penning down in your journal pretending not to notice the way I started at you; as time slipped away. You never stopped me, because you knew how hard it was for me to say bye to you even if it was for a few hours. Compensating for it, weren’t you? It was like knowing that your hands could end me and I still chose to hold them anyways. Each day, I turned into a painter; noticing every detail of your beautiful face. Wanting to register everything in my mind, holding onto your face like someday I might not be able to look at it again. Dil minnate kare Na tu ja na pare Tere jaane se jee na paaunTu thodi der aur thehar ja sohneya Tu thodi der aur thehar ja Remember how you told me that ‘we’ felt like something you’ve always wanted, something you’ve always craved? How you always wanted love, and how I was there at the right place? I think that you lied. You left. It killed me, infact it kills me every single moment of everyday and I just let you get away with it. You promised me, that at the end of the day it would be us against everything. Now I look around and it’s just me. I’m the only one left here. Our souls were made of the same elements; half-broken; half-love. I gave you all the good parts and kept what was left. But you hid a return ticket in your back pocket after telling me this was a one-way journey. That this was a flight which will never land. That we will drive until the sunset bleeds into the night and the wheels are nothing but the marks that they leave on the road; and we’ll still keep walking after. But one day, you told me about that return ticket; you told me that you had to leave. That this journey that we were on, was over; you told me I wasn’t the companion that you wanted anymore. I kept holding your hand and whispering, begging “I love you. Please don’t leave. Everybody leaves. I’ll fix it. I’ll fix everything. Please don’t leave me. Please don’t take away my only hope to wake up in the morning.” It was then that you told me that you never intended to stay, that I was just a pitstop. A hotel that you faked to be a home. I swear I died that day. It just felt as if all the seasons were poured out of me. Like I was reborn. Like I was snatched away from the place where the heart and the soul meet. I could feel the explosion of a different, distant universe. People had always come and gone but this felt so different. Nothing like I had ever felt before. Like someone had ripped my heart from my chest. My love you made sure that I was headed for the void, why didn’t you see this through with me; like you promised? I am torn that you are not here. My hand misses the shape of yours, and I am drowning myself in my own silence. I lay still, but the stillness is no longer familiar. Though the night is filled with enough sadness to make me feel like, I can get another chance of finding you again; and we’d get to share another moment. I know that even then, I still wouldn’t love you any less, and you cannot love me just a little more to stay.

[caffeineandfiction]

08/03/2022 Tuesday 2:25PM It’s okay to still miss you, right? It's okay to still miss you, right? Being strong isn’t equal to stop missing you, is it? I love you And I loved you But I still lost you. Is this how it’s supposed to feel? Missing you; Every dawn tastes sunless. Yesterday, I was so tired. But that’s how it’s been for me lately- tiring. I walk along the earth with my bare feet to the ground, trying to feel connected to something; anything. But I remain untethered. I don’t know if I have a body anymore. And even if I do, it for sure doesn’t belong to me. I wish someone had warned me that when you look into the eyes of a ghost you are left with the feeling of being haunted. You took so much from me that I don’t even have any of myself left. Yesterday, I dreamt of you. I was reading and I dozed off. There you were, beautiful as ever. With that breath-taking smile of yours. And even in my dream all I could think of was how much I miss you. How much I miss your voice. I miss how it sounded when you told your stories; our stories. And when you said I love you. And when you said “I’ve waited for you half my life, I’ll wait till the end of it. I’ll take you home to meet mom & dad.” I miss your eyes; those eyes which have always had more stars in them than the universe itself. Not just my dreams. I still see you in glimpses. I see you in my arms. I see you in my future (as my future). I still have all your pictures. I still have the voice notes you sent me. What could be sweeter than this? In beers and lonely nights, in dull afternoons; I miss you. I miss you in ways you cannot imagine. I miss you so much it hurts. It tears off pieces of my flesh and I am willing to let it because I am not ready to give up the feeling of missing you. I promised to never let you feel cold again. But I no longer know how to fulfil it from this far apart. I never wanted you to leave, because without you I’m lost. Since the moment you’ve gone it feels like an outstretched eternity. But you know I’ve always been greedy when it came to you. So, I will love you from afar. I will love you like a flower in its full bloom even when seasons start to change. I will hold you in my memories for as long as I can, not one less second, not one less heartbeat. That even if I am only standing still without saying a word and the world around me is turning, I will be satisfied with my silence (your silence because you’re no longer here to tell me your stories; our stories).