cainnleacghlovers

[cainnleacghlovers]

i don’t feel alright ✩ kylian mbappé

Summary: you went for the first time with kylian to a party, but you didn’t expect to see his ex-girlfriend (she’s mean 😡)

Note: just a little bit of angst and i tried my best, so i hope you guys like it! :)

Kylian puts his arms around your waist and tucks you better into his lap, he knows how much you love being close to him and does everything to make you comfortable.

"It's your first time here, right?" Neymar asks with curiosity in his eyes.

You lift your gaze to him and nod briefly with a small smile. "I've never been here before, I'm not normally one to go out much."

"But I'm changing that." Kylian moves you to sit sideways on his lap so that he can face you as he speaks.

"Unfortunately." You chuckle.

In the meantime, you got lost in the middle of Neymar’s conversation about the Liga’s games and watched the people dancing around with drinks in hand.

For a moment you thought you saw wrong, but you knew better, and you knew VERY WELL who that person next to Tchaga was.

Tchaga came closer and with each step you felt your heart speed up a little more. Why was he bringing her close to you? It was so uncomfortable, you felt uncomfortable with the presence of a person who always teased you.

During the months you and Kylian have been together, she has always made it clear that she doesn't like you and that Kylian’s friends are her friends too. The only thing you had to do was to accept this and keep all this teasing to yourself.

"Hey, doll. How are you? Long time no see." Tchaga pulls you off Kylian’s lap and hooks his arms around your neck pulling you into a hug. It's impossible not to like him, he's always been extremely affectionate and kind to you.

You disengage from the embrace and smile openly at him. "I'm fine, I missed you so much."

Tchaga runs his hand through your hair affectionately and already sets off to greet Neymar and Kylian. When he leaves your field of vision, you see the way Rose looks at you.

Of course she ignores you and goes off to greet the boys with all the happiness in the world, but you let it pass. You won't let it ruin your night.

Conversation goes on and on and you can only get stressed out by the way Kylian doesn't seem to notice in the way she treats him. You hate the way she laughs at him, you hate the way she puts her hand on his knee while talking and you hate even more how no one seems to notice the way she ignores you.

They believe this talk of her wanting to keep their friendship, even after they have been dating for 2 years, and simply ignore how she still loves him and how she still wants to be with him.

These thoughts of negativity come at you and you just want to run away, you just want to get out of there as fast as possible and ignore them until everything is sorted out in your mind.

It's not jealousy, you swear it's not. It's just unfair how everyone seems to ignore how you feel and not even question whether you would be comfortable with her presence there.

You murmur, already getting up to leave. "I'm going to get something to drink."

Kylian turns to you and lets out a smile, already getting ready to get up to walk you to the bar. You put a hand on his shoulder to make sure he stays seated. "Stay there, I won't be long."

He finds your attitude strange and your manner of speaking so serious, he really doesn't understand what has happened. He watches you leave with a frown and is tempted to leave to go after you, but Neymar looks at him and says to leave you alone for a while.

You lean against the bar and feel Kylian’s gaze burning into your back, but you don't turn to face him. You just need to take a deep breath and think straight before you say something that could hurt both of you in the process; you don't want to act impulsively and regret it later.

You order a drink from the barista and just feel your phone vibrating in your front pants pocket, you know it's Kylian and try your best not to pick it up and read the messages, but you can't control yourself.

Kyky 🥰: hey!!!!

Kyky 🥰: What's going on?

You took a deep breath and stuck to answering his messages briefly.

You: Nothing happened, I just felt thirsty.

Kyky 🥰: I know you. Kyky 🥰: Please, don't lie to me.

And he is right, he knows you. He knows you so well that you get annoyed, he knows every single detail about you and he can decipher your every thought and expression.

You: I don't know, Kylian. I really don't know.

You: I only feel like a stranger when she is around you.

You let out a sigh after sending this message, letting this thought that has been troubling you for a long time get out of your mind and transmit it to Kylian causes you a mix of anxiety and nervousness about what he will think.

Kyky 🥰: I'm coming to you, stay there.

You put your cell phone back in your pocket and lean more sharply against the bar counter in expectation of Kylian’s appearance.

Lost in your thoughts, you only feel a pair of strong arms around your waist and Kylian resting his chin on your shoulder.

"You're the most important person in my life" He whispers in your ear and in the meantime leaves a kiss on your neck. "I'm sorry if I made it seem like I was letting you down and that your feelings aren't important."

You let out a tense sigh, the fear of losing Kylian terrifies you in a crazy way.

"I don't want it to sound like I'm forbidding you from seeing your friends, but…" You pause to think of the right words to describe what you are really feeling, "I don't know, Kylian. She doesn't like me because she still loves you, she wants to get back with you and the thought of losing you hurts me and I really don't want to go through another disappointment, I don't know…I…"

Kylian turns you around to face him and stares deep into your eyes. "Hey...Look at me, I'm completely in love with you. I can't even think of another word that defines how I feel about you except love." He sighs and runs his hand through your hair, messing up a few strands. "I hadn't noticed these attitudes of hers and I guess for a moment I was excited about the idea of keeping the friendship, but if she doesn't treat you well and it bothers you, I completely understand and respect that. I want to apologize for not noticing this sooner, but I need you to communicate more when something or someone bothers you, mon amour…" He strokes his thumb across your cheek and looks at you with those dark eyes.

You see the sincerity in his gaze and regret not having spoken to him before, you would have avoided so much inorpotent upset thoughts.

“I was scared to look like a neurotic, but I don’t really feel comfortable with these attitudes of her, Kylian.” He runs his arms around your hip and you melt into the comfort of his arms. He always knows how to make you feel good.

"I will never ignore your feelings and try to put you in that "crazy" position" He caresses your cheek once more and leaves a kiss this time. "I know it's a complicated situation and I apologize again for not asking you instead of just letting her into your life like that, even more now knowing that she treated you badly."

You completely understand his position, especially since you didn't speak or explain your thoughts. Kylian will always find a way to work things out with you and help you sort out your feelings and that's one of the things you love most about him, the way he always makes a point of caring about how you feel.

"Thank you for understanding me, I love you." You first leave a kiss on the cheek, another on the neck and forward your lips to his deepening a kiss to show all your love for him.

Kylian reciprocated, letting one hand slide to your hip while the other went to the back of your neck so he could have control to deepen the kiss even further. After your little show, he separates giving you three pecks. "Let's say goodbye to Tchaga and Neymar and let's go. We have business to discuss, young lady."

He gives you a smirk and pulls you by the waist to say goodbye. Now, more than ever, you know there will be no more ex-girlfriend problems.

[cainnleacghlovers]

ireland you eejits you were so bloody close

where was mbappe??? in coleman’s pocket🫢

[cainnleacghlovers]

I had a full crisis a while ago because I want to do F1 engineering (Women in stem💪) and I knew there were Irish colleges that have a course in what I need but if I went to an English college I have a better internship chance

but I would not be able to afford housing in England not that here inDublin is any better and also I love my little country so much I'd miss it💕

also did I say had a crisis? STILL having it.

first off, a woman in stem we loveeeee (could never be me, i can barely count with my fingers)

second off, i had this crisis too!!!!

i wanted to study theology and history as a joint degree, but it’s not offered here, and i did get an offer to study it in Kent, but i ended up not taking it and stayed home.

housing for Uni is ridiculously expensive, and i’m only in Belfast, so i totally get where you’re coming from.

i know how much i hated unsolicited advice when i was picking, so i don’t want to give you any!! but if you’re struggling, let me know!!!

if i can help, i’m more than willing to!

[cainnleacghlovers]

MADE FUN??? HUHH?? its such a pretty name, i dont know if it means something but still 💓

my name is a version of an old Irish goddess!! Cailleach. She was goddess of the cold and the winds. She’s known as ‘the veiled one’

which is a coincidence because that was not the reason my parents called me Caínnleacgh😭

Fun fact, I have 4 older brothers, and my parents were convinced I was going to be another boy, so they only picked out boy names. (It’s a joke in my family that we only have boys. I have mainly boy cousins, and my dad has 7 brothers… Irish families back in the day…)

They really liked the name Toírleach, and when I was born, and I wasn’t a boy, they still liked the name, but just added a C😭😭

[cainnleacghlovers]

No my toxic trait is History and politics are all I know how to talk about because I was an only child and the closest relatives to my age were 10 years older than me, so all I talked to were adults

HISTORY AND POLITICS DEGREE GIRLIE HERE !!!!!

same here!!! growing up with a Republican dad and mam who had a cousin shot, that’s alllllll that was talked about in our house

trying sooo hard to unlearn everything i’ve been taught about english people😭😭😭

[cainnleacghlovers]

I am a Chels girl through and through but Oh mo Dhia Rúben Dias is fit

That is 50% of the Irish I remember from school, the other 50 being sheanfhocails 'Is fearr Gaeilge briste ná Béarla cliste"

‘Mol an óige agus tiocfaidh sí’ was one said alll the time when i was at school

please tell me someone else went to Gaeltacht 😭

[cainnleacghlovers]

your name is sooo pretty 😭

as someone who’s been made fun of for her name her whole life, i am in tears. thank you so much🥹🫶

[cainnleacghlovers]

My fave comment to make in response to the Chicago river being dyed green is

"Yeah? well our river is actually green all the time"

you need goggles to see, we can’t even see with goggles on our waters that dirty 🥰

[cainnleacghlovers]

I find it so sad that Irish has diminished so much that I'm better at Spanish (which i started learning at 13) than Irish (learning started at 5)

LITERALLY

i can speak semi fluent french better than my broken irish

my granda is turning in his grave at me leaning french better than irish

[cainnleacghlovers]

So real for that john stones comment

underrated babe

[cainnleacghlovers]

why do no artists come here?

Taylor Swift bby I beg of you come here

I say that like I can afford tickets

croke parks right there gal

i’m literally broke so i hope she doesn’t come here because i physically could not know she was in the same country as me without throwing myself into the liffy

[cainnleacghlovers]

Look I am a very much Irish girlie with a very much Irish name

but put Leah williamson or mason mount in front of me and I will fold so damn quick

put John Stones in front of me, and i’d literally remove the fada from my name and i’d burn a tricolour🥰🥰🥰

[cainnleacghlovers]

No but my bf is english and an arsenal fan

Im Irish and a chelsea fan

this may go drastically wrong

in our we’re celtic and liverpool

chelsea and arsenal what a combo 😭 two sexy teams to be fair

[cainnleacghlovers]

My best friend Cousin is dating a guy from belfast nothing wrong with that right?

Ordinarily no, nothing wrong except for the fact we found videos of him burning the tricolour and outwardly hating Irish people

i’d bet you 100 quid it was on the twelfth.

belfast is literally the worst for that sort of shite. you’ll meet someone, and i wait to hear how they say their ‘h’s’

probably burned the pope and sin feiner’s on a bonfire in the middle of god knows where

[cainnleacghlovers]

I was dissapointed when My mock results in HL english were 87 and HL Irish was only 70

I feel like a traitor

me when it took me ages to get my gold fáinne

[cainnleacghlovers]

Its so funny because my Mam's side is Dublin as far back as you can go but my Dad is from kildare, his parents from wicklow and mayo and their parents from donegal/kerry

i’m a Tyrone girlie on my dads side

my mams parents are from Wexford and Mayo, and their parents are from Roscommon and Carlow so we’ve got a bit of everything in our house

[cainnleacghlovers]

One of my primary teachers was from Donegal, another was from Kerry and the last from Mayo

we learned a different Irish dialect every year

think the only thing that’s similar about Irish in other counties is the slang 😭