• Local Cryptid • they/them • 21 • Thanks for visiting my corner of the web 🕷️Multimedia Artist | Dungeon MasterCommission Status: Closed
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"what groceries u been into recently" is actually a great question, there's a bunch of good conversations inside it
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i think it is important to recognize the ways in which your favorite thing sucks. i think it keeps u normal
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at least theres still listening to music while staring at the ceiling
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I was born with a curse called ‘I want to know everything’
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the procrastinator’s mind will invent distractions you’ve never conceived of in order to avoid tasks even a dog could do.
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Pipe sprung a leak in the bathroom the other day and the cat came and bothered me about it and I can't stop thinking about it. She doesn't know what a towel or a mop is but she knew there was an unauthorised fucking Wet and she trusted my ability to rectify the situation
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my white ass is not immune to the nostalgia of viva la vida by coldplay
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There’s a level of confessional that only occurs when someone is driving you home late at night
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who keeps breaking into my freezer and replacing the trays full of little water with ice cubes
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You know for the first 18-ish years of your life everyone your age is mostly doing the same things and then all of a sudden every year for the rest of your life somebody your age is getting divorced while somebody else just learned what a leaf is and you have no idea what’s going on or what you’re supposed to be doing
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a tumblr account should enable you to see everything on other social media sites without making an account there. like a student visa.
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pls god where is the fourth of julie goodbye 2007 hello 2008
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its funny when events that probably couldve been traumatic dont bother you so you'll end up casually dropping stuff like "so after that time i almost got lost at sea as a kid-" and theyll be like WHAT and youre like. oh yeah dont worry its just part of my lore. its honestly not even a top five interesting backstory moment. focus please.
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they're hiring me at the extra virgin olive oil factory as the oathsworn knight who protects the chastity of the olives
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sorry i can’t go out tonight i’m at home sitting down
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