callmealai

[callmealai]

I am constantly grieving.

Constantly mourning ends and beginnings.

Life is change.

I say, 'people are like water,

we rot when we're still'.

I repeat it often

Easy, practiced.

The words roll off my tongue like my own name

(what a curse it is, my own name)

(what a blessing)

People must change, must grow.

End and begin.

And yet. I mourn every end.

Every beginning.

Clothes sit untouched at the back of the closet.

I can't bring myself to wash them.

To wash away the last vestiges of what was

Before the end.

To wash away the scent, the bits of glitter

The way the sun would hit the wall when I was leaving.

I can't look up, see the new beginning approaching.

Like a train. Like a fist.

Like a sunrise.

I will mourn all the same.

Isn't an end just a new beginning?

Isn't a beginning just an end

by another name?

If I must be water, let me be tears

[callmealai]

Maid cleaning a massive chateau surely belonging to the richest people you’ve ever seen, and as she’s walking from room to room you notice that every single portrait is of her

[callmealai]

I'm so bad at living, which sucks a lot because I have spent my whole life doing it

[callmealai]

pie pngs ♡

[callmealai]

Do you have a black and white version of that frog pattern? I tried turning down the saturation to make it grayscale, but it would still print a lot of gray area and waste a lot of ink.

Yea here sorry it took so long for me to get to it 😭

I had to redraw it cuz my dumb ass combined all the layers lol

[callmealai]

i dont think i posted these but here i made a little frog pattern to make tiny frog toys with my grandma

this is the first lil guy I made while still learning how i should sew it

[callmealai]

There's no such thing as failure when it comes to diy. Sometimes the result is not what you expected, and then you learn how not to do the thing you wanted to do, but learning is still a positive outcome.

Don't listen to people who tell you your diy project looks shit, even if they're telling the truth that's the devil talking

[callmealai]

Some women are conditioned to be fragile and weak, and to believe that it's a sin to outperform a man. Her feminism would involve allowing women to be strong.

Some women are expected to be strong at times when they can't. Her feminism would involve reassuring her that it's okay to not be strong.

Some neurodivergent people are raised to believe that they're too stupid to ever amount to anything. Their disability activism would involve reassuring them that they're capable.

Some neurodivergent people are raised to believe that they're smart and gifted, and are expected to live up to impossible standards. Their disability activism would involve allowing them to fail, make mistakes, be stupid, etc.

Some children are constantly reminded "you're the child, I'm the adult" in order to deny their autonomy. Their youth rights activism would involve treating them like an adult at times when they feel ready for it.

Some children are treated like adults in order to justify increased expectations or to downplay abuse against them. Their youth rights activism would involve allowing them to be a child.

There is no one-size-fits-all solution to oppression. Each individual person's experience is different. Whatever trauma is caused by their oppression, the activism should focus on undoing it.

[callmealai]

googling shit like "why do i feel bad after hanging out with my friends" and all of the answers are either "you need better friends" (i don't; my friends are wonderful) or "your social battery is drained, you need to rest and regain your energy levels" (i don't; i've got tons of energy, it's just manifesting as over-the-top neurotic mania). why is this even happening. it's like some stupid toll i have to pay as a punishment for enjoying myself too much

[callmealai]

i like working at plant store. sometimes you ring up someone and there's a slug on their plant and so you're like "Oh haha you've got a friend there let me get that for you" and you put the slug on your hand for safekeeping but then its really busy and you dont have time to take the slug outside before the next customer in line so you just have a slug chilling on your hand for 15 minutes. really makes you feel at peace with nature. also it means sometimes i get to say my favorite line which is "would you like this free slug with your purchase"

[callmealai]

[callmealai]

Pretzel Manatee blesses you with his pretzel tail 🥨

[callmealai]

you are invited to their party!

[callmealai]

[callmealai]

A delivery only restaurant named "send help" that specialises in hangover food. Everything comes with some sort of an electrolytes beverage, if not two, a bag to throw up in, and one of the food options is simply "whatever", and you get an order of whatever random food options the kitchen happens to find the most convenient.

The "whatever" can be specialised, like ordering a two-piece vegan whatever gets you two random vegan options, there's "whatever w/ peanut allergy", kosher whatever, and so on.

The halal option comes with a free letter reminding you of the reasons why a muslim shouldn't drink.

[callmealai]

When you see them, look down.

Don't look them in the eyes. They don't like it.

Keep your head down, and close your eyes, if you can.

You will hear them pray. Praying won't save you, but join in, if you know the words. If you believe them.

If you don't believe, they will know. You don't want them to know.

You might hear wailing, and you might feel the urge to wail. Cry if you must, but be quiet. Don't interrupt the prayer.

Don't look up until you can't hear them anymore. Don't move. Your journey can wait.

And if, in the morning, you awake to find something missing.

Or something new.

Don't think too hard about it. It belongs to them now.

And what you have been given, don't get rid of it.

It won't protect you. But they will claim it back.

When you see them, look down.

[callmealai]

The woods are lovely, dark and deep 🍃🍂