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[caniaska-question]

Cult of the Lamb story where Narinder tries to court the Lamb with old-timey practises. At first, he’s angry the Lamb keeps brushing him off, an additional injury to his bruised ego, but then realises the Lamb just genuinely doesn’t realise what his actions mean. He reasons it might be better, he can be as romantic with the Lamb as he wants, get his feeling out, without anyone realising how he feels.

Then one day he massively fucks up by basically announcing his feelings for the Lamb in front of the entire cult. This would not normally be an issue, he does so regularly, except his recently-indoctrinated siblings are well aware of what exactly he meant.

And, as his siblings, they all have roughly a thousand years of embarrassing him in front of his crush to make up for.

[caniaska-question]

I’ve just started playing cult of the lamb, and I already have an au for it.

Au where, before everything and back in the time of old gods, there were two gods of death. One was Narinder , god of quick, violent death. However, the other was a god of slow deaths. Natural, yes, but also long, suffering deaths from illness or starvation.

These two gods bring lost souls to the after life, either gently or dragging. They’re seen as almost a pair. It’s best to pray to both of them, for a long, happy life, and again for a peaceful afterlife.

Then, in the wars between Gods, the Shepard was killed. They’re weren’t made to be a violent God. And the Hunter was left in charge of all death. He tried, for some time, helped by his siblings, to cover all death, but he’s one half of a pair, and he knows he can’t continue forever. He gets desperate, he doesn’t know how to peacefully help the dead. The dead start to genuinely fear him, and it becomes a rumour that, no matter what, your death will be violent and painful.

Narinder obviously hates this. He was fine with his work with a companion, someone to gentle his hand when he needed it. He doesn’t try to reverse death for his own gain. He wants his Shepard back. And then his siblings trap him, in the place that belonged to the two of them once.

The Shepard fades. Stories of Narinder’s cruelty take over any other myths from before . The bishops don’t speak of him at all. And Narinder, in his prison, loses the memories of his companion, as is his punishment. He only remembers parts of it, a sheep that accompanied him for some time. A vague feeling of only being half of a whole. He chalks it up to his chains, and searches for a lamb to free him.

Once Narinder is betrayed and made to join a cult in another’s name, he finds parts of his power coming back. Not enough to challenge the Lamb, but enough to be his equal. His siblings have also been introduced to the rest of the cult, and the strange look they give him when he forgets himself and enjoys his time with lamb unnerve him.

They don’t know how to tell him how much more himself he is now, with his other half back. They’ve half forgotten the stories themselves. They’re sure he’ll remember his Shepard, eventually.

[caniaska-question]

Okay so, I know a lot of people here are mostly interest in my eldritch babysitting au, so-

I have begun writing it. My initial plane was one or two chapters to set up the story, then the archives start.

It is now five chapters in, and we are still at college!Jon.

To anyone willing to read this story, what’s the course of action you want-

Option one and three will mean the story takes longer to make, but fleshes out the world a bit. Option two lets the reader decide the backstory for themselves mostly, but also might be a little weird without more info.

[caniaska-question]

*jumps into the ring two weeks late with the lowest quality meme possible*

SO ANYWAY-

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What the fuck is this??????????

Folks: you CANNOT censor trigger tags. When you block a tag, it doesn't block other "spellings" of it. Writing it as "r@pe" or "r4p3" means that someone who has "tw rape" as a blocked tag will still see that post because you didn't wanna say the word rape. You are hurting people. Do not censor words, because people do not have those filtered out.

And honestly if you can't even write the word rape to protect other people then you probably aren't old/mature enough to be on this website.

[caniaska-question]

Pt 2 of how the entities all end up in Jons head.

Thing is, Jon does what children do. They talk, they interact, they humanise. Kids have this weird trick of giving inanimate objects the most human emotions and treating them like an actual feeling person. So does Jon.

And it should scare him- the Dark is used to kids, knows how to scare them, but the others don’t. Jon picks bugs for fun, plays in the dirt and climbs trees and stares at people, like most kids. And when there’s 13 other voices in your head, having one that’s a little creepy isn’t that scary- especially since Jon’s grandmother refuses to let him sleep with the light on, so he’s pretty used to the dark already.

And Jon /talks/. A lot. Talks to the people in his head that are weird and slightly off-putting but also always there for them. Gives them names and emotions and laughs when something doesn’t scare him.

And it’s new, for the entities. We know how humans see them does affect them, because they’re human fears, so Jon’s humanisation of them makes they more connected. They spend more time watched them, and eventually Eye makes the decision to talk to him. And Jon talks back.

Now, the fears are hesitant, but they all eventually open up- there’s still a couple Jon’s not marked with, but they get there eventually. This does mean they actually need to talk to each other, since Jon wants them to talk to each other to, and this developed them more. This sort of connection with one person forces them to evolved almost-human emotions, which is - terrifying, because eldritch fears aren’t supposed to feel that, but they do, and Jon isn’t the most careful child anyway, and these fears weren’t equipped with raising this child, but they’re here now, and it’s the only marked that doesn’t treat them like a consequence or deity, so….

They eventually explain everything to Jon, along with a very complicated plan to make him an ‘avatar’ of them all (the avatars avatar, if you will). This does nothing to dissuade those /emotions/ Jon take about to them a lot, but it’s worth it, really.

[caniaska-question]

I’ve been reminded of my ‘communal parenting for the eldritch aligned’ au, and would like to apologise for lack of content- in apology, a small lore drop i wrote a while ago!

As far as I’ve figured out, the Web is vaguely connected across universes, or at least is aware of each of them. Because of this, I’d say the reason the entities all connect to Jon like a Bluetooth speaker is because the Web Knows somehow he’s important, but they don’t completely know why.

So the web focuses on Jon and realises that Jon’s already primed for a couple different fears- already touched by the end, spiral, buried. It’s confusing, there’s no explanation as to why some other Web thought they’re important.

But the other entities notice Web’s interest. The three already there are annoyed, but the Web’s interference has already marked Jon as well. That doesn’t stop the other entities seeing child Jon, and maybe it’s an overlap with another universe where all of them mark him as an adult, maybe it’s how fearless they are in any situation (like most children are,since most of them don’t go for children outside of Dark), maybe it’s a way to annoy Web, which is always fun, but all of them eventually mark Jon as a child.

Unfortunately, this does force them all to interact /slightly/, but since they’re just marks, all of them just ignore each other

Until they can’t.

Pt 2 next- I don’t know how many users actually enjoy walls of text posts.

[caniaska-question]

I have watched gay pirate show, and I have ideas-

AU where Ed doesn’t maroon the crew. Instead, Izzy’s speech about following Blackbeard but not Ed it interrupted by Lucius, who kicks him out and tells Ed that the rest of the crew like Ed, enjoy him as a crew mate and a captain, and that Izzy’s full of shit for telling him he’s weak. Ed has a breakdown because he doesn’t really know who ‘Ed’ is outside of the time he’s spent with Stede, so Lucius tells him he’s welcome to figure it out, and the crew’ll help him, because they’ve all been there and want to help him.

They’re all a little upset that Stede left them, but through figuring out who ‘Ed’ is, Ed gets closer to the crew, teaches them more about pirating, and tries to learn who he is outside of the Blackbeard persona. All of them are proud of him for it, for being more open and understanding, for not backsliding (There’s a rota in Lucius’ cabin for who has to intercept Izzy from getting Ed alone each day).

Then Stede comes back, successful fuckery aside, and the rest of the crew don’t know what to do. At this point, they’re still angry, but it’s cooled by the time apart, and Ed is angry, but not cruel. Stede apologises to them all, says he was worried that he wasn’t enough of a captain they deserved, that he hoped Ed would take them under his wing. And he apologises to Ed, obviously.

And Ed doesn’t know how to explain that he has changed, that he’s different, even from the Ed Stede knew, but Stede just smiles, tells him as long as he’s whoever he wants to be, Stede would be happy beside him. They make up (out) and the rest of the crew slowly get used to him again, made easier by the fact that they see Ed, who they’ve seen come out of his shell slowly over the past few monthes, is happier now Steve’s here.

Basically, the crew of the Revenge adopt Ed as a replacement/mentor and then get emotionally invested.

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TMA analysis time! I have too many AUs and want to tak about canon for a minute?

Know my favourite theme about any fictional thing? HUBRIS! Pride and self confidence as a means to a downfall! Yes, Jon has more than enough hubris, seeking out dangerous scenarios in order to gain answers (although I’d argue he was more desperate than confident), making rash decisions because he thinks he’s correct without knowing everything about the thing. But my favourite pieces of hubris are the two arguably antagonists to Jon: Jonah Magnus and the Web.

Jonah spends an awful lot of time assuming he can play Jon the way he wants with no consequences. He actively makes Jon feed the eye and become more powerful because he assumes Jon will never be the favourite. He never takes into account how impartial the eye is to that kind of thing, or how Jon being central to his plan makes Jon just as likely to be in charge of the new world. Jonah forces him into a place of power without realising the consequences because Jonah, for all his knowledge, is blind to the idea that anyone could surpass him.

But the Web! The Web is my favourite due to its, frankly, ironic twist. The Web assumes it can play Jon and everyone else into its plans (yes, I know Annabelle has her own plans, but it is likely the Web has a say in this). But Jon doesn’t. Jon doesn’t follow their plans because he knows if they allow the Entities to go to another universe he will feel guilty for the rest of his life- he hates the idea of another person being in his place, being forced to go what they went through while he gets the life he wants. And while a large part of this is because of how people treat him after realising they started the apocalypse, I think a major piece of it is Jon’s guilt. You know, Jon’s guilt that at 8 years old, Jon was forced to watch someone he doesn’t remember take his place and be killed because they passed off his fate to them, that he let the Entités get to another person because he didn’t take responsibility for it.

You know, the guilt that the Web specifically gave him in order to make him listen. That guilt. The stuff that gave Jon the need to go against the Webs idea and break the cycle. Hubris for the mother of spiders, get fucked.

[caniaska-question]

Adding to this- Martin is strong as hell. The most important thing he has ever done in the archives is be the only one who is capable of carrying the biggest, heaviest boxes. Tim is as strong as he looks, but Martin is a tiny powerhouse. He’d never just outright beat someone up, but don’t think he can’t.

The only reason Jon doesn’t bring it up is because the first time he realised was when they almost fell off a ladder in document storage and Martin caught him, and proceeded to hold a person almost a foot taller than him in his arms for almost a minute as he checked them over. Jon then went into his office and spent ten minutes deleting those memories from his mind so he didn’t have to overthink them.

Years later, Martin routinely finds ways to pick up and move his partner just to watch Jon get incredibly flustered at their tiny, strong husband.

I see your ‘Martin Blackwood is tall because he must be at least a foot taller than gremlin Jon’ headcanons, your ‘Martin is tall but he forces himself to look small’ headcanons, your ‘Martin is the more physically threatening of the two’ headcanons- but I’d like to say, I will always head canon Martin as shorter than Jon, for a very easy reason.

You can not tell me, that Martin- Martin ‘Kill Bill’ ‘Arsonist’ ‘K stands for knife’ Blackwood- is not the personification of ‘small friend will actually fuck you up.’ That man is 5’6 at most and brimming with unadulterated rage. He’ll take your kneecaps as payment for being mean to his boyfriend, and the only reason the slaughter has not taken him is because, honestly, he’s too good at acting polite.

Jon is at least 6’ and has the energy of a large dog that thinks it’s a lap dog and runs away from strangers.

[caniaska-question]

Every eye avatar/ strongly eye aligned person has at some point in their service been wildly attractive.

I’m completely serious- a whole thing with the eye is wanting to talk to and/or tell them things, it’s a major part of their feeding the eye. The most effective way is to have a power that makes people unable to stop taking to you sure, but it also cost lots of energy and has to be applied every time. Being generally attractive, or even just giving off a specific air of ‘you /should/ be at least a little attractive to me’ is easy, it’s subtle and, most importantly, it means the statement giver might not run away screaming the second they realise somethings wrong.

The reason every regency gentleman in Victorian England wrote to Jonah Magnus like they wanted him carnally? Eye makeover. Gertrude originally had a ‘get the hell out of my way’ kind of attractiveness that made her incredibly scary, and then later that morphed into a much subtler ‘i am a harmless old woman, tell me your secrets’ kind of vibe. Gerard got it too, and proceeded to run wild with his fashion choice, since he’d probably look good regardless. The reason Jonah picks the hottest Twink every time he body-hops is a long standing habit of being the most attractive person in the room.

Everyone in the archives, regardless of their time, gets a little boost. Some, like Tim, don’t really need it but get it anyway. Melanie joining gave her the boost to ask Georgie out. Jon gained it slowly overtime until he reached Archivist status, which combined with his ‘i am trying very hard to be better’ and ‘do not interact with me’ vibes, gain quite a following from anyone who catches a glimpse of them. Martin also gets it, and regains it a bit after the Lonely, which really puts him in first for ‘most likely to get someone talking.’

[caniaska-question]

Jurgen Leitner’s been dead for 5 slutty, slutty years

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I see your ‘Martin Blackwood is tall because he must be at least a foot taller than gremlin Jon’ headcanons, your ‘Martin is tall but he forces himself to look small’ headcanons, your ‘Martin is the more physically threatening of the two’ headcanons- but I’d like to say, I will always head canon Martin as shorter than Jon, for a very easy reason.

You can not tell me, that Martin- Martin ‘Kill Bill’ ‘Arsonist’ ‘K stands for knife’ Blackwood- is not the personification of ‘small friend will actually fuck you up.’ That man is 5’6 at most and brimming with unadulterated rage. He’ll take your kneecaps as payment for being mean to his boyfriend, and the only reason the slaughter has not taken him is because, honestly, he’s too good at acting polite.

Jon is at least 6’ and has the energy of a large dog that thinks it’s a lap dog and runs away from strangers.

[caniaska-question]

I am aware i post more on my reblogging account than my main one, however-

TMA time-travel au, Jon and Martin go back to the beginning of season one after the Panopticon collapses, ect,ect. But this time, Jon has kept his connections to the other entities. He’s still marked by them, is still the archive, therefore he still has those web-made connections.

But the web hasn’t made those connections yet.

This is still when Jon-prime (the non-time travelling one) is only marked by the web, and the other marks are months off, no matter what the Web and Jonah were planning. By all accounts, those connections shouldn’t exist- but they do because they still happened, just not yet. So how?

Well, simple. The Webs connections between Jon and the Entités are strong, very strong, they don’t just disappear because the Web doesn’t recognise them. Instead, once they got cut off from the entities, they attach themselves to the only other part of that connection-Jon. Because at this time, the entities aren’t connected to Jon, but he’s connected to them. As time goes on, when he encounters the other entités, these connections fall back into place with one difference-they’re coming from Jon. Not the Web, or the Eye. Is it because they know more now, so the entities can’t manipulate him? Is it because he’s stronger, so he can overpower the avatars? Is it because the webs connections have no rules, and also the entities just want his attention, so they jump at the connections without understanding the consequences? Unclear! But now it’s less of a ‘puppet strings’ web and more of a ‘I’m not stuck in here with you, you’re stuck in here with me.’

Martin is having the time of his life watching his husband fuck with the entités through their own personal web, and also the potential Web!Martin watching the chaos unfold and pressing ‘decline’ on the 8th call Annabelle has sent him today.

[caniaska-question]

Seeing Monster!Jon in any capacity is always fun to me, but I wish we took advantage of batshit-hybrid monster designs more-especially while he’s still worried about acting human?

More eyes? That’s basically canon. Feather wings? Sure. Moth wings? Why not! Over seven feet tall? Jon is small as hell normally, why not change it up! Tape recorder voice? Love that! Tails, scales and fur? Can’t go wrong with basics! Multiple arms? All the more hands to be held! Metallic tape bonds/hair? Thematically appropriate! Hell, those segmented legs with three bones and claws at the end? If it’s vaguely monstrous and inhuman, it counts! Go buckwild, there is no complete canon description in this area, which roughly translates to any ideas you have can and are canon, simultaneously.

Bonus if Monster!Jon has furs/cloaks/some way of showing they are still human through clothing. And, as a personal aside, after their ascension to the pupil of the Eye, they get a crown made of spikes that literally grows from their skull out of his scalp. Is this while they’re still partially human? Is this an au where they’re forced to stay in the apocalypse? Is this something that stays even when they go back to a more human appearance, showing an un removable change due to their rise in power? Unclear, but still cool.

Monster Jon, beloved.

[caniaska-question]

I don’t know how canon this is, but I always head canon Jon as having physical marks from all the fears.

There’s canonical ones- the desolation with his burnt hand, the corruption with the worm marks, spiral and slaughter stab marks and the hunt with his neck scar but I have a list of (I think?) non-canon ones:

Web- they got a small gash on his leg where the guy pushed him over before grabbing his book. By all accounts, it should have healed quickly, but it never fully went away.

Vast-a part of him (maybe his other hand) turned black due to frostbite from being high up, or maybe falling at terminal velocity has caused permanent wind burn.

Stranger- explosion marks across the left part of their neck and face

Buried- partially his cut off finger, or maybe scrapes across his body from climbing around in the dirt

Flesh- he has scars from his impromptu surgery

End- maybe fractures in their skin across his scalp and down the back of his neck, akin to the death tendrils, since I think it was impact with the floor/walls that killed them, not the actual explosion

Dark- possibly the skin around his eyes lightened- (something like vitiligo?) nothing affecting his eyes, since they can’t be blinded, but still. Or marks under his eyes (white freckles, shallow slashes, ect)

Lonely- parts of his hair go stark white, making their hair almost a complete gradient from black to white.

And, as a bonus- in an au (time-travel, post-200, anything end of series) Jonah attempts to body swap with them at the panopticon, and Jon can only stab him once he’s already lost one eye, making the eye technically the last Entity to physically mark them.

[caniaska-question]

Please, please just one fic where Jon tells the archive staff (s1 or later, I don’t care) about Mr Spider and how it affected him, whether by force or because he wants to, and he can finally get closure about what happened to them when they were 8, and the archive staff realise how much all the supernatural stuff affects him because of all his emotions about something that happened to them almost 2 decades ago.

Give him a hug please.