capnbald

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Reblog this if you’re Team Instinct 

Team Valor

Team Mystic

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Not to take away from the points above, but AMC cut that shit out real quick. https://twitter.com/AMCTheatres/status/720972338699702272

“With your advice in hand, there will be NO TEXTING ALLOWED in any of the auditoriums at AMC Theaters. Not today, not tomorrow and not in the foreseeable future.”

Phone-friendly movie theaters for millennials are coming

AMC Entertainment’s new CEO Adam Aron wants to appeal to more to millennials by letting them use their phones in theaters.

“When you tell a 22-year-old to turn off the phone, don’t ruin the movie, they hear ‘please cut off your left arm above the elbow,’” Aron tells Variety. “You can’t tell a 22-year-old to turn off their cellphone. That’s not how they live their life.” Aron believes that AMC needs “to reshape our product in some concrete ways so that millennials go to movie theaters with the same degree of intensity as baby boomers went to movie theaters throughout their lives.”

The CEO is aware that his company is “going to have to figure out a way to do it that doesn’t disturb today’s audiences.” When asked whether there might be certain sections that allow texting, Aron replies “That’s one possibility. What may be more likely is we take specific auditoriums and make them more texting-friendly.”

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Sunnie is a good arter. Everyone should go buy her arts. Haven’t played in forever but holy cow is Splatoon a fun game. Before anyone asks all the characters in the game wear shorts, I wouldn’t be so scandalous as to show my knees in real life.

Another drawing of a member of the squid squad!!  This is @capnbald, who’s strategy is being much bigger and meaner and balder than the other inklings.

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I love that Dalinar basically ordered the Stormfather into bonding him and I’m really hoping that in the future the Stormfather will be just the snarkiest, most passive-aggressive dweeb to Dalinar ever.

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Hamlet, Scooby-Doo Style

[This is one of the funniest, most brilliant damn things I’ve ever read.  It dates from very early Internet days and I thought it deserved resurrection to Le Tumble]

This recently discovered folio edition of “Hamlet” follows other known versions closely until Act V, Scene II, where it begins to diverge at line 232, as will be seen:

KING: …`Now the king drinks to Hamlet.’ Come, begin, And you the judges, bear a wary eye.

Trumpets sound. HAMLET and LAERTES take their stations

HAMLET: Come on, sir.

LAERTES: Come, my lord.

Enter FRED, DAPHNE, VELMA, SHAGGY, AND SCOOBY

DAPHNE: Wait!

SHAGGY: Stop the fight!

HAMLET and LAERTES put up their foils

KING: I like this not. Say wherefore you do speak?

FRED: Good lord, I pray thee, let thy anger wait. For we, in seeking clues, have found the truth Behind the strange events of latter days.

VELMA: The first clue came from Elsinore’s high walls, Where, so said Hamlet, Hamlet’s ghost did walk. Yet though the elder Hamlet met his death, And perforce hath been buried in the ground, ‘Tis yet true one would not expect a ghost To carry mud upon his spectral boots. Yet mud didst Shaggy and his faithful hound Espy, with footprints leading to a drop. This might, at first, indeed bespeak a ghost… Until, when I did seek for other answers, I found a great, wide cloth of deepest black Discarded in the moat of Elsinore. ‘Tis clear, the “ghost” used this to slow his fall While darkness rendered him invisible.

FRED: The second clue we found, my lord, was this.

KING: It seems to me a portrait of my brother In staine’d glass, that sunlight may shine through.

FRED: But see, my lord, when placed before a lantern–

KING: My brother’s ghost!

HAMLET: My father!

VELMA: Nay, his image.

FRED: In sooth, that image caught the Prince’s eye When he went to confront his lady mother. Nor did his sword pierce poor Polonius. For Hamlet’s blade did mark the castle wall Behind the rent made in the tapestry. Polonius was murdered by another. The knife which killed him entered from behind.

LAERTES: But who?

FRED: Indeed my lords, that you shall see.

HAMLET: And if this ghost was naught but light and air, Then what of that which I did touch and speak to?

The GHOST enters.

GHOST: Indeed, my son.

SHAGGY: Zoinks!

DAPHNE: Jenkies!

GHOST: Mark them not. Thou hast neglected duty far too long. Shall this, my murderer, live on unharmed? Must I remain forever unavenged?

SCOOBY and SHAGGY run away from the GHOST. SCOOBY, looking backward, runs into a tapestry, tearing it down. As a result, tapestries around the walls collapse, one surrounding the GHOST.

GHOST: What?

FRED: Good Osric, pray restrain that “ghost”, That we may reach the bottom of the matter. Now let us see who truly walked tonight.

FRED removes the helm and the disguise from the GHOST’S face.

ALL: Tis Fortinbras!

FRED: The valiant prince of Norway!

FORTINBRAS: Indeed it is, and curses on you all! This Hamlet’s father brought my own to death, And cost me all my rightful heritage. And so I killed this king, and hoped his son Would prove no obstacle to Norway’s crown. Then Claudius bethought himself the killer (As if one might be poisoned through the ear!) The brother, not the son, took Denmark’s throne, And held to Norway with a tighter grip. I swore an end to Denmark’s royal house. I spoke to Hamlet of his uncle’s crimes. Then killed Polonius to spark Laertes. This day, with poison’s aid, all might have died, And Denmark might have come to me as well As my beloved Norway and revenge. My scheme blinded them all, as if by fog But for these medd'ling kids and this their dog.

KING: The villain stands confessed. Now let us go. For much remains to us to be discussed. And suitable reward must needs be found For these, our young detectives and their hound.

EXEUNT OMNES. Copyright 1993 Michael S. Schiffer

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reblog if you’re cosmere trash

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Present for @capnbald, been waiting to show this one off for awhile, Happy birthday man.

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when u call for ur dog n u hear the lil pap pap pap of their feet as they come to u

reblog if u agree

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When can I see the supermoon eclipse tomorrow night?

On Sunday night, people in parts of western Europe, western Africa, North America and all of South America will be able to see a lunar eclipse. And this one’s extra special, because the moon will be at its perigee – the closest it gets to Earth. Not only will the moon turn red (learn why it turns red here) it will seem larger than usual.

In the first GIF I’ve listed the times the moon will enter Earth’s faint shadow (the penumbra) and then its darker, red-tinted shadow. You can figure out exact times for your location using the U.S. Naval Observatory’s handy calculator. 

The second GIF shows the eclipse from another perspective - looking down on Earth’s north pole. This is to scale. It always surprises me to see how far apart the moon (the white dot) and earth (the blue circle) really are. The sun is off screen to the right, casting a long shadow. The colored lines radiating from earth show the approximate horizon lines in the four time zones. Once the lines pass, the moon is visible. Everyone in the contiguous US will be able to see the eclipse, but only people in the Easter and Central time zones will be able to see it start.

(If you want this information in song, some awesome sixth graders from Old High Middle School in Arkansas updated my eclipse song from last year. Or check out this completely original and funny song by Scarlett Simmons).

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My favorite Disney Dad (despite his lack of actual parenting!)

The original Hot Dad.

Hot damn.

featherwriter How’s this for an animated version of Dalinar?

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Brandon Sanderson is a god

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i’m on a fucking roll with these things. forget grad school, this is my life now

Gravity Falls + Onion Headlines: Part 1

Queer Stans: Part 1 / Part 2

AToTS text posts: Part 1 / Part 2

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What if Netrunner was a card anime

Inspired by this comic Somebody Stop me.  DA Link

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Making Bouillabaisse

Because you know I'm making bouillabaisse, Bouillabaisse (no truffle) I'm making bouillabaisse, bouillabaisse (no truffle) I'm making bouillabaisse, bouillabaisse (no truffle) I'm making bouillabaisse, bouillabaisse Yeah it's pretty seared, this ain't no fried food But I can baste and flake it like I'm supposed to do 'Cause I got that good food that all the chefs chase All the right forks in all the right places I see those instagrams working the filter shots We know that bisque ain't real Come on now, make it stop If you got gloomy foodies just add some spice 'Cause every dish of yours is perfect From the sauces to the rice Yeah, my momma she told me keep honing all of your knives She says, chefs like a little more sharpness to make 'em slice You know I won't be on pinterest, repinning wedding cakes, So, if that's what's you're into Then go ahead and start to bake Because you know I'm making bouillabaisse Bouillabaisse (no truffle) I'm making bouillabaisse, bouillabaisse (no truffle) I'm making bouillabaisse, bouillabaisse (no truffle) I'm making bouillabaisse, bouillabaisse I'm bringing foodie back Go ahead and tell them skinny fishes hey No, I'm just frying I know you think it's bad, But I'm here to tell you that, Every dish of yours is perfect from the sauces to the rice Yeah, my momma she told me keep honing all of your knives She says, chefs like a little more sharpness to make 'em slice You know I won't be on pinterest, repinning wedding cakes, So, if that's what's you're into Then go ahead and start to bake Because you know I'm making bouillabaisse, Bouillabaisse (no truffle) I'm making bouillabaisse, bouillabaisse (no truffle) I'm making bouillabaisse, bouillabaisse (no truffle) I'm making bouillabaisse, bouillabaisse Because you know I'm making bouillabaisse, Bouillabaisse (no truffle) I'm making bouillabaisse, bouillabaisse (no truffle) I'm making bouillabaisse, bouillabaisse (no truffle) I'm making bouillabaisse, bouillabaisse Because you know I'm making bouillabaisse, bouillabaisse, (no truffle) I'm making bouillabaisse, bouillabaisse (no truffle) I'm making bouillabaisse, bouillabaisse (no truffle) I'm making bouillabaisse, bouillabaisse