captainwatanabae-blog

[captainwatanabae-blog]

devilishidol‌:

Yoshiko didn’t see herself as being all that useless at reading people. Well, that, and she caught the apparent disappointment in You’s expression and voice.

Her words may have indicated that she didn’t mind, but, did she not want Yoshiko to leave? Or did she just not want to be alone? Even if she’d just take anybody… maybe staying with her for a couple more hours wouldn’t hurt. She was, honestly, pretty weak for her, and Yoshiko could feel a pain in her heart whenever You seemed sad. She just couldn’t ignore it.

“Er, well…” Yoshiko’s face suddenly held a bit more firmness to it, as if she wasn’t going to change her mind now. “Actually, it’s not like I have any plans for the next few hours. I’ll just be bored at home, and I’m not really tired, so you wouldn’t mind if I came over to your place for a bit,” She gave a small smile. ”Right?”

That worked as an excuse, she hoped. Either way, the bus had already started moving again, so that didn’t matter. It was only getting later, and if she remembered correctly, this was the last bus of the day. But, even if she had to take her time walking home later, she felt anything was worth it to keep helping her friend cheer up.

Realizing that the bus had begun to move, You reached out to take Yoshiko by the hand and guide her back to a seat. Eh? Her hand seemed so warm, almost like she was about to overheat. “Huh? No, I wouldn’t mind.” Normally, she’d sound a bit more excited by it, but at the moment, she seemed worried more than anything else, and held the back up her hand up towards her junior’s forehead.

“Hey, Yoshiko-chan...” She furrowed her brow, thinking hard about what it could mean. “Are you feeling okay? You’re kinda hot...” Maybe it would be normal to be concerned that she could be sick, and thus contagious, but You wasn’t the kind of person to think steps ahead like that. Her only thought in that instant was trying to remember if there was anything at her house that might help.

As Yoshiko’s senior, it was her duty to take care of her, wasn’t it? Taking her hand away from Yoshiko’s forehead, she instead gave her a small pat on the head, before setting it back in her lap. “There’s lots of juice and snacks back at my house, okay? So you can get back on your feet. It’s probably been a long day for you too, right?” Even if the other girls hadn’t gotten up as early as she had, or had to compete, it was still a full-day event.

[captainwatanabae-blog]

devilishidol‌:

“Ah…” Yoshiko answered quietly. Her friend’s respond was slow, and somehow, a little bit hard to believe. She wasn’t sure if it was just the other girl’s tone or the atmosphere between them, but even so… Yoshiko knew she should try to believe her. It was for the better, and maybe she was being honest.

“Don’t mention it. I’m glad to help, and it’s reassuring to know you’ll be alright in the end…” Regardless of the way she felt for You, it’s important to be supportive and help as much as she can. It might’ve been sad at first, but she was glad she walked into the locker room when she did. She was glad she was able to stop You’s tears somewhat, and make her day a little better. Or, she hoped that was the case.

Yoshiko squeaked lightly, feeling the other girl’s cheek softly fall against her shoulder. She swallowed as she looked down at her, cheeks flushing. Maybe it was a little weird to think of it, but her gentle sleeping face was cute. Really cute. But more than that, she could understand how tired You must be. With the competition, and all the emotions… it had been a really long day. Perhaps it didn’t go just as Yoshiko expected it to, but she didn’t think it ended on too bad a note.

After all, she got to have this moment. It was so peaceful, and for a few minutes, it seemed like she and You were in their own little world. Of course, though, it had to come to an end when the bus seemed to stop all too quickly, and Yoshiko had to get off. She didn’t want to disturb the sleeping girl, but it also didn’t feel right to just leave her like this.

“…You-chan,” Yoshiko lightly shook the other girl, “I’m going to have to go home now, okay?”

“Nn... few minutes more...” Groggy and still half-asleep, she only leaned further as Yoshiko turned to speak with her. Her head fell into the lap of the younger girl, at it was at that moment that You awoke fully and realized her situation. At the embarrassed discovery of a bit of drool at her lips, the diver bolted upwards. She brought her hand to her face, rubbing both to clean whatever might be on it, as well as try to jog herself completely into the waking world.

“Huh? Go home?” Ah, they were still on the bus, of course. The day felt so long already that You had mistaken believed she’d fallen asleep at home, or over at Yoshiko-chan’s apartment or something. She supposed that made sense, though she wasn’t looking forward to having another few hours left in what hadn’t shaped up to be the day she’d hoped for.

"Right, okay.” It wasn’t like her to be disappointed by much, as she’d developed a bubbly optimism that she took with her everywhere, but You seemed a bit brought down by the news. “I’ll talk to you later then, Yoshiko-chan. Thanks for coming to see me dive.” Her preference would be staying to spend time with someone. Her dad was still off at sea, and her mother was busy for sure. Maybe Tsuki would be willing to come hang out with her?

Almost forgetting that the bus was stopped, and someone was still looking at her, Yoshiko straightened up and forced a smile onto her face. “I mean it a lot. Thanks, Yoshiko-chan.”

[captainwatanabae-blog]

devilishidol‌:

It had been a long wait for the girls, other than Yoshiko, to see their friend after her victory. None of them were, luckily, really impatient, but that didn’t subdue their relief when they saw You walking towards them. “Well, I’m glad you didn’t lose it. You earned it, after all.” Kanan started, grinning in her direction.

“B-but, you’re not dumb, You-chan!” Ruby exclaimed, seemingly a little pumped up. “Ruby-chan’s right! And even if you’re a little forgetful… That’s okay!” Hanamaru chimed in, bound close together with Ruby like usual. “Now, girls, I think we know TALENT and FIRST PLACE are what’s most important today~ Don’t underestimate our You-chan! Naturally, we have to celebrate on the way home!” Mari added, linking arms with You.

Dia, watching with a slight smile, crossed her arms. “Let’s allow her some rest instead, okay? I’m sure she’s tired. Furthermore… we can’t miss our train back home, right? We should go before it starts getting late.”

Nevertheless, the train ride back to Numazu was… pretty lively and eventful, even without every member of Aqours present. Of course, it was still hard to shake the feeling that two energies were missing amongst all the fun, and Yoshiko herself felt worn out by the day.

It honestly felt pretty relaxing to be able to separate from most of the group once arriving in Numazu, but being on the bus, alone with You again was making her confused. What should she say? Or should she not talk at all? Would it be stupid of her to try to bring up Chika again, or what they discussed in the locker room, or anything serious? It might not be good to come off as too casual either. Or… she was just starting to stress too much over this…

“H-how… how are you feeling? Compared to earlier, I mean…”

You felt like nodding off. It had been an early morning, getting up in time to get to the event with time to spare, practice runs, a brief orientation, organization, then the trials themselves... It was enough to drive a girl to exhaustion on its own, and that was without even adding in all the emotional turmoil she’d been through in the past few days. 

“Huh?” Looking over at her friend next to her, You was slow to answer. How was she feeling? In the flurry of talking to everyone on the train back to the city, it was easy to forget sorrow, or negativity, or anything except the casual cheerfulness of spending time with friends. But... That didn’t necessarily mean that those emotions had gone away altogether.

“I’m... better,” she answered. That much was true, at least. What was the expression that everyone used? Like tearing off a bandage? It was like that. The pain was still deep, still fresh, still painful, but... Having resolved to bury her feelings and not interfere with Chika and Riko’s burgeoning relationship, while not necessarily fixing her hurt, at least took a weight off her shoulders. What she wanted couldn’t happen, not without ruining everything first. All that was left was for her to cheer her friends on.

Right, that was the best thing to do. “Mmhmm, I’m better,” she repeated, although her voice wasn’t as convincing as she would have liked it to sound. “Thanks for putting up with me, Yoshiko-chan.” Had she said that earlier? It was a little hard to remember, with so many things having happened. Oh well, there was probably no harm in saying it again if she had. She yawned, closing her eyes. “I’ll be okay.”

Slumping to the side, her cheek rested on the younger girl’s shoulder, as it became clear that You had fallen asleep.

[captainwatanabae-blog]

devilishidol:

Yoshiko, at least, understood just wanting the person you love to be happy. She understood well, to the point where she was doing something similar to You. Trying to support her while suppressing her own feelings, because it would be no use to tell her how she felt. If anything, You would just get upset and Yoshiko never wanted that. It was so stupid to hope for anything more.

“You’re a good person.” It was definitely better to just move on with the day and try not to think about this anymore. Yoshiko could feel a pain in her heart, and it was getting to her. “To care so much about how they feel… You really are.” As much as she didn’t want to say it, it would probably be better for everyone if You just… stopped feeling anything for Chika. But she didn’t feel as if it was her place to say something like that, and maybe that was better said than done.

“And… if you feel like this is the right thing to do, I’m not going to stop you.” She didn’t want to try to convince her of something else, only to have things end badly. That seemed like the most probable result here, and at this point, it wasn’t like she wanted to try at all. You was right. “You should trust your own feelings and your own instincts. And as humans say�� everything happens for a reason. You’re a good girl, and destiny has good things coming your way. Don’t let this get you down too much, okay?” Yoshiko said, scratching lightly at her cheek. Surely, life had better plans for You than it did for a cursed girl like Yoshiko. She could just tell.

Yoshiko stood, crossing her arms. “Everyone’s still waiting outside, so I’ll let you get dressed. Let’s talk more on the way home.” She started walking towards the door, only to stop after a few steps. “A-Anything is fine. Even if you just want to get your mind off all of this… I’ll help you. I don’t really mind.” With that, she walked quickly out of the locker room, heading outside.

If it was the right thing to do... What else was there? It would be selfish of You to meddle in Chika and Riko’s relationship, and that was without even considering the ripple effect it could have on the rest of Aqours. It couldn’t be helped, even if she was less than reassured by the notion of things happening for a reason. That seemed too flighty and insubstantial. What kind of reason could there be for something like this? If destiny had something in store for her, then why would it push her towards Chika, only to pull the orange-haired girl out of her path right as she got close?

“...Right,” You murmured, picking herself back and smoothing her still-wet hair out of her eyes. She was holding everyone up, and wallowing in her own misery probably made her seem ungrateful to the friends that did come to support her. Certainly, it would hurt everyone’s feelings if they knew that one particular absence meant more to her than six others coming to cheer her on. And given that she’d won, she really needed to seem grateful for her luck and accomplishments. “Right,” she repeated.

A few minutes later, she stepped out of the locker room, still a little damp, but affecting a wide, slightly apologetic smile. The gold medal was looped around her neck, hanging down over her shirt, and a small back containing her gear was slung over her shoulder casually. Giving a wave to her friends, she stepped closer, an embarrassed giggle bouncing from her lips.

“Ehehe... Sorry for making everyone wait so long,” You started, before holding up the medal. “I took this off to take my shower, but I must have set it down somewhere strange, ‘cause afterwards, I couldn’t find it!” Sticking out her tongue, she tapped at the side of her head with her fist. It was a lie, but given her reputation, it was probably believable. “Sorry I’m so dumb and forgetful, hehe.”

[captainwatanabae-blog]

devilishidol:

“You… can’t confess?” Her words, left without further explanation, confused Yoshiko. She knew very well there were obvious hurdles in her way that made it seem pointless to confess, but it seemed so unlike the other girl to give up like that. She didn’t expect it, but Yoshiko didn’t feel as if she was in any place to either agree with You’s feelings or try to continue to encourage her. Even if she knew what she truly wanted, it wasn’t like she was close enough to You to actually make a difference in this.

“Y-You don’t have to thank me. I’m just trying to do what a friend should.” She was glad to see that You seemed to be feeling a little better at least, and that Yoshiko was actually able to help with that. Maybe she wasn’t as bad of a supporter as she originally thought she was.

But even so, something inside her wanted to push You for more answers, even if she knew that wasn’t the right thing to do. She probably didn’t even want to talk about this anymore, and Yoshiko understood. It was upsetting for her, if that much wasn’t already clear enough from how much crying Yoshiko witnessed within just a few minutes. Still… even with all those thoughts running through her head, she couldn’t stop herself. She spoke without thinking, her voice raising with a certain eagerness.

“Hey, You-chan… Are you really okay with that? I-I mean, just keeping your feelings to yourself…” What did You plan to do? Just let her feelings fade away and watch supportively as her friends got closer and closer? That wouldn’t be easy, would it? It wasn’t like this was some crush You had. She shared a strong relationship with Chika that seemed to be long-lasting and unbreakable, and it wasn’t like there was an easy way to escape witnessing the important moments in her friend’s life, or the pain that came with them. Or, that was how Yoshiko saw it, at least.

“I’m just… not sure you should let everything go so easily. But if you really don’t want to, or if everything fails, then…” Then… what? She wasn’t even sure what she was going to say; a consequence of speaking without thinking. Staring aimlessly ahead of her, Yoshiko frowned. “Then I’m always here. To be your friend, or… or whatever.” Realizing she was probably stepping a bit too far into this right now, she couldn’t bring herself to say anything more than that. She almost felt like she could’ve taken some sort of chance right then, but it just didn’t feel right.

It wasn’t that You herself was all that experienced in matters of the heart, but maybe it was the case that Yoshiko didn’t know anything when it came to love. That probably would make sense, wouldn’t it? After all, being a fallen angel probably didn’t leave a lot of time for romance. You had been in Yoshiko’s stream countless times when some fan jokingly (or not so jokingly) confessed to her, and it rarely seemed to rattle her. Maybe she just hadn’t thought very much about that kind of thing.

Which was probably why she was having such a hard time understanding You’s perspective. “I think...” Her voice, already a little hoarse and weak from crying, faded out before she could finish her thought. Perhaps that was for the best, since what even did she think? How could she explain the complicated set of emotions tripping and falling over each other in her heart, in a way that would make her friend understand her?

“I think,” she started again. “When you care about someone that much... You just want them to be happy, right?” She sighed, rubbing at her eyes further until the tears were all gone, replaced instead by puffy red abrasions. “And even if... It’s not like Chika-chan and Riko-chan are cold-hearted people... If they knew about the way I feel, both of them would feel bad, wouldn’t they?”

Well, maybe her jealous nature wouldn’t mind if Riko felt bad... And knowing that only made her feel worse. Chika, though... She wouldn’t like it to know that she had, in any way, caused her orange-haired childhood friend to feel a single ounce of heartache. “It’s not like a confession would change anything at this point, right? It would just make everything feel awkward. So... So that’s why it’s better if I just keep these feelings to myself.” She’d survived this long keeping them locked away. Maybe this would finally be what she needed to kill them off for good.

[captainwatanabae-blog]

devilishidol:

Yoshiko, though taken aback as You pulled her into a tight hug, slowly reached forward and lightly rubbed her friend’s back. Her touch was shaky, definitely, but she hoped it offered more comfort, at least… Hearing her apologize, though, was an awful feeling. What was she sorry for? Surely, nobody in Aqours would mind waiting longer if they knew what was going on; not that Yoshiko would say anything about this.

Trying not to get upset was proving to be a challenge the more You spoke, and she swore she felt her heart twist with every word. After she pulled back, Yoshiko sat up next to her instead, eyes trained on the girl’s face as she tried not to look away. “You’re not stupid, don’t say that… and never apologize to me. I understand, and I’m glad you told me how you feel.” Perhaps not really glad, more like Yoshiko was relieved to be trusted. Even if she already knew of You’s plans…

“There’s always another time to tell her how you feel, right? Imagine how proud she’ll be when she finds out that you won. It isn’t your fault that she’s not here, or that things turned out this way…” It was definitely selfish and horrible to think this way, but it truly hurt Yoshiko to say such things. She honestly didn’t feel like Chika was even worth her time. She wanted to support them, but it was getting clearer and clearer what was going on here. If Chika cared more for Riko, why should she bother? However, Yoshiko could probably ask herself that same question.

Luckily though, Yoshiko was managing to stay calm and cool on the exterior despite her thoughts, which was definitely a good thing. She was unsure how she didn’t start sobbing already, but she guessed it was probably just some hidden strength she had saved for the girl she liked? She could only hope that it would continue to last for a bit.

Yoshiko reached up to wrap her hand around one of You’s wrists, carefully pulling it away from her face. ”If you need to cry, let it out. You’ll feel better that way… I don’t mind, I promise.” She wanted to make that known, even if she hated to see it, and and even if tears didn’t suit You or her cute face very well.

Stay calm, Yoshiko… “I guess… things just happen for a reason. I don’t know what would’ve happened if you confessed, but I do know that you would’ve looked so cool that it would’ve been stupid of her to do anything but accept. So cool that you would’ve rivaled the fallen angel herself.” She managed a small smile, holding You’s hand in hers.

The permission to cry seemed to be all she needed, and You leaned back in to rest her head on Yoshiko’s shoulder, letting herself shudder with quiet sobbing. She didn’t really want to cry in front of Yoshiko, but it seemed inevitable, and so the best thing to do was just get it all over with. Furthermore, even if she knew she wasn’t setting the best example, the comfort of her junior’s fingers gently rubbing at her back was undeniable. 

“I d-don’t think I should,” she sputtered weakly, although it wasn’t immediately obvious what she was referring to. Rather than explain herself immediately, You took advantage of her labored breath to try and fit together the jumbled puzzle pieces of her thoughts. Did she really mean that? The two girls had been at each other’s sides since grade school, and You had always sort of assumed they’d end up together.

But things changed, and they got older, and Riko took her chance, and You hadn’t. Even with how complicated her feelings about the whole situation were... What good would it do anyone to confess now? She could never resent Chika, could never bring herself to even sharpen her tone in anger towards her. With Riko, it was different, but for the sake of their group and the sake of her own friendship with the red-haired girl, it made sense to try and put everything behind her. Confessing now would only make everything more painful for everyone.

“Confess,” she finally added. “I... I can’t.” This was it, wasn’t it? No longer just the doubts or worries, now it had been more or less confirmed that her friends meant something to each other that she didn’t mean to them. Shaking her head, she pulled out of the hug once more, looking down at the floor of the locker room while the last few tears dripped from her face. Even if it was difficult, You tried to smile. There was no way of turning this zero into a one, so she just had to accept it.

“Thanks, Yoshiko-chan.” She ran her arm across her face a few times, smearing the tears rather than properly wiping them. “For listening, and... for always being there for your air-headed senior.”

[captainwatanabae-blog]

devilishidol:

Everything just… went better than Yoshiko could’ve ever hoped, and she felt guilty for even doubting You in the first place. She couldn’t think of anyone more talented or amazing than her, and she knew she deserved her victory and placement so much. Yoshiko couldn’t help but smile for so long that her cheeks began to hurt, and end up on the verge of tears because of how proud she was. Even as her friends began to look at her curiously and strangely, she didn’t care. It was a little weird for someone who was usually so protective and secretive about her feelings, maybe, but she was truly happy.

Though, as minutes passed, the stands began get emptier, and the other competitors were already leaving with friends and family. Eventually, it got to a point where the six girls were the only ones left, and You still hadn’t joined them. Everyone was excited and wanted to congratulate her, after all, and Yoshiko was starting to worry. Chances were that she was probably just stuck talking to other girls in the locker room or something. She knew she must be popular, especially today, but still… Yoshiko had a feeling. “I’ll… be right back. I’ll bring You-chan with me, so wait for us.” She said before heading down to the locker room.

Opening the door and peeking inside, Yoshiko didn’t see anyone at first. As she walked inside, she noticed that it was really quiet too, until she heard something that sounded like…

“H-Hey…” She hadn’t really expected to find her friend looking so upset, but she couldn’t say that she didn’t understand why. She had an idea, but she didn’t know it would matter this much to her. As if unsure how to correctly deal with this, Yoshiko stood quietly for a few seconds before kneeling down in front of You, a hand on her shoulder as she did so. It was difficult enough for her to be comforting in most situations, but even more than that, it was difficult for Yoshiko to control her own feelings enough so that she wouldn’t start crying herself. She never liked seeing any of her friends sad, but when it was You, it was almost heartbreaking.

“…You did so well. Everyone’s proud of you, and we all want to see you.” That was probably a pathetic excuse for comfort, but Yoshiko wanted to try, at least, to be a good friend. “But… if you still need a few minutes alone, I understand. I don’t want to be a bother or anything, but you can also talk to me. Just… tell me what you need? Please?” She asked, making sure to keep her voice soft.

Yoshiko already knew what she really needed, and it wasn’t her. But, if there was anything she could do to help while they were alone, she wanted to know. As long as she could get a smile out of You, or even just make her a little less upset.

As footsteps echoed through the locker room, You did her best to wipe at her eyes and pretend like nothing had gone on, but it clearly wasn’t any use. Still, she guessed it was better that it was someone she knew, rather than someone she didn’t. Yoshiko, specifically, probably had some idea what was wrong, and while it was a little embarrassing to be caught crying like this, You was more grateful than not to have someone to support her.

Barely a moment after Yoshiko had put her hand on her shoulder, You lurched forward and tightly wrapped her arms around her junior. She felt a little guilty, as probably her friend didn’t want to hug her, but... Selfishly, You wanted the comfort and support. Although, she didn’t necessarily want anyone to worry about her either. She needed to project an image of stability and strength, to set a good example for her younger friends.

“I’m fine, r-really. It’s just... ehe, lots of emotions after a competition...” She tried to force a laugh, but it died on the wind almost immediately. It was obvious that she wasn’t telling the truth, and lying made her feel even worse. “S-sorry,” she mumbled, feeling her eyes start to leak again. “I’m probably holding everyone up, aren’t I?”

There was a fragile silence for a few seconds, as You tried to hold back her tears, but she gave up pretending as soon as she began to stain Yoshiko’s shoulder. “I was going to confess, you know? I thought it would be... really cool if I won, and I could dedicate it to her...” She tried to steady her breath, but only succeeded in gasping a sputtering hiccup as she pulled back from her friend.

“I thought I could say something cool like ‘I only won ‘cause your cheering spurred me on’ or ‘I never could have done this without you’ or something, b-but...” What was even the point of explaining all this? Surely Yoshiko didn’t want to hear any of it. “It’s...” She shook her head, frantically rubbing at her face to try and wipe away all the tears. “It’s stupid. I’m stupid. Sorry, Yoshiko-chan.”

[captainwatanabae-blog]

devilishidol:

Yoshiko managed to work herself up even more with nerves while time continued to pass before You’s second dive. Everything felt… so exhaustingly slow. She’d never really been interested in diving, or any sports at all, but when You was concerned, it suddenly mattered so much more to her. Somehow, she felt so much more invested in everything about it.

Her heart pounded in her chest seeing You step on the board once more, and she could hardly keep her eyes focused on the girl just because of how scared Yoshiko was. Though, that quickly changed as soon as she jumped off. She didn’t notice how beautiful and captivating diving could be when pulled off successfully (and, perhaps by the right person?), but… her dive seemed to end as quickly as it started.

The higher score announced afterwards successfully pulled Yoshiko back into reality, and she sighed in relief. Though… would that be enough to get You anywhere in the end?

Yoshiko suddenly felt a hand on hers, and, as if to answer all her questions, Ruby was beaming up at her with a hopeful smile. “Y-You know… You-chan should just need one more good dive to pass! That’s what Kanan-chan was telling me about earlier! Didn’t you hear the same thing, onee-chan?” She seemed to have noticed Yoshiko’s concerns, but she wondered how long she knew…

“She did say that.” Dia nodded to confirm, thankful that at least Kanan knew a lot about the sport. “Mm! T-Then… I don’t think there’s much to worry about! I’m sure she’ll pull through! After all… we all know how talented she is.” Ruby squeezed Yoshiko’s hand, trying to reassure her further. 

Yoshiko smiled back at the smaller girl, nodding. “Well, she’s one of my little demons, is she not? To disappoint is a crime against the Fallen Angel Yohane herself, so how could she even think of it?” She spoke in an attempt to subdue her friend’s worry a bit, but the newfound information only made her feel worse. Another failure would hurt even more, but should she be underestimating You? Or overestimate, and have hope like Ruby suggested…? If only the results would come already, so her distress could subside…

She wanted to go home. It wasn’t that she didn’t care about diving; she loved it. It wasn’t that she didn’t want to win; she was a born competitor. It wasn’t that she wasn’t good enough; she was among the best in the region. It just all seemed so meaningless in the face of everything else that happened. If she did poorly, everyone would want to comfort her, but doing well wasn’t as important without Chika there to see it.

Still, there was no sense in walking away. She couldn’t abandon her school or her coaches like that, and so she would have to do her best. You wasn’t even sure how it was possible to be driven by... not vindictiveness, exactly, nor anger (never that), but... inferiority? She supposed that was the best way to put into words what she was feeling.

She wanted to be the best, as if to show what was being missed. Riko was a talented musician... but tons of people were talented like that. In the water, the amount of people who could do what You could had to be only a few thousand, maybe, in the whole world. It was way more special and way more unique, and even if she thought poorly of herself sometimes, it was still true that she had something to be proud of... That she had something for other people to be proud of.

But Riko was her friend too, and she was kind and supporting and caring, and You could imagine her in bed, with a cold compress on her forehead and a thermometer tucked under her arm, firmly urging everyone to have fun without her and do their best to be supportive. If their roles were switched, there was no way the red-haired girl would feel so resentful and jealous as she did.

Her head was a mess, but her motivation, at least, had returned. For reasons partially unknown even to her, her body was focused. Maybe it was muscle memory again, or maybe it was the realization that if she didn’t succeed, this season would be over for her. Either way, when she vaulted off the diving board, she stunned everyone with her poise, each movement tight and controlled, and when she hit the water, there was nearly no splash.

She was near the last to make her third dive, and everything after that was a blur. A gold medal, a picture, a list of those qualifying for the next event with her name at the top, a series of bows to the crowd, coaches, and judges, and then the showers. She washed the smell of chlorine off her body, sure... But long after everyone else had already left, she still sat in the locker room, swimsuit-clad, shaking softly as she tried not to cry.

[captainwatanabae-blog]

devilishidol:

The girls had all been chatting amongst themselves, but silence was cast over them as You’s name was called. As soon as she stepped on the board, Yoshiko could tell that something was off… It wasn’t like she knew much about diving herself, but even she knew easily.

Yoshiko winced seeing her friend land right on her stomach, and the low score announced shortly after made her heart ache. She couldn’t imagine how You was feeling at that moment, and so absorbed in her own thoughts was she that she didn’t even hear the rest of Aqours start clapping for You, completely without care for how good or bad she did. It wasn’t until Hanamaru nudged her that she was brought back to reality, and joined her friends in their support.

“You-chan, you can do this!” “We believe in you!” “Don’t give up!” “We’re supporting you until the end!” “You still have a chance!” “We know you can pull through!”

After all, the best thing they could do right now was offer You their love and support. As a group, their combined voices stood out well from the whispers and chatter from the rest of the crowd, hopefully more than loud enough so that You would be able to hear them. They all cared so much for her, and more than seeing her making it past regionals or coming out on top, they wanted her to be happy rather than down on herself. No matter the results of today, that would always stay true.

Still… Yoshiko couldn’t help but wonder what went so wrong for You to mess up like she did. Was it just a physical mistake at the beginning that led to this? Or was she feeling sick? Was she stressed? Nervous? Just feeling down? It could’ve been anything, she supposed.

She and You would more than likely be alone for a while later, so she could probably ask her about it then. That is, if she wanted to talk to Yoshiko about it. In any case, she’d respect her feelings as best as she could.

Now waiting on her second round, Yoshiko felt a bit more anxious than earlier. If she could do really well, was there maybe a chance You could still get through? She didn’t know exactly how it all worked, but she hoped so…

It wasn’t like You to dwell on her failures. Sometimes she spent too much money without realizing it, or tried out some new dive she’d seen online without practicing, or starting sewing something she’d designed without even considering the measurements. Sprinting ahead full throttle, never stopping even if she tripped or stumbled, that was her nature, wasn’t it? Or was that just Chika’s nature, and she’d picked it up along the way? 

It was hard to say, and although it was nice that she could hear her friends cheering her on from the stands, it actually just made You feel worse. She’d been one of the biggest supporters of the group, with the idea that each of them could support the others, so how hypocritical would it seem that she cared most about one person’s opinion?

Another girl botched her dive, and didn’t even return to the line after the announcement of her score. At least she’d never give up like that, You thought, before chastising herself for thinking so unkindly about one of her peers. The competition was structured around three dives, with the lowest score dropped and the other two added together to make one’s final score. There was something noble about continuing to make the effort, but if that girl’s first two dives had both been poor, then maybe it was better to just get out of the way?

That didn’t sound like her at all. She would never say something like that, so why was she thinking it? Normally, she’d go out of her way, even jumping out of the line, to tell her that it was worth it just to try, and it didn’t matter if you fell short, but with everything going on... Could she really deliver that kind of message honestly? Wouldn’t it have been better if she’d ignored or buried her feelings, or even never had them in the first place, rather than get all fired up?

Before she even realized it, it was her turn to dive again. She was still overthinking things, but thankfully, her muscle memory kicked in before she even had time to sabotage herself. Her second dive was far better than her first, and though it wasn’t a top score, it gave her a good chance of qualifying if she could duplicate it on her last chance. If she hit near her personal best, she’d probably rank first altogether. She should have been happy.

She wasn’t.

[captainwatanabae-blog]

devilishidol:

@captainwatanabae

The day of You’s swim meet had arrived, and Yoshiko was sitting in the stands, having come with five other girls; not seven like previously expected. It was certainly a bit of a surprise when both Chika and Riko (and You too, though she just had to leave earlier than everyone else for some preparations and practice) were missing when Aqours met up at the train station earlier. They were You’s closest friends, after all… it was unlike them to do something like that. Yoshiko took it upon herself earlier to text Chika and ask where she was since nobody else heard from her that morning. She took out her phone, rereading the conversation they had.

Fallen Angel Yohane: [ Where are you? Riko too… Everyone else is at the train station and we’re all about to leave. You was looking forward to seeing you today… ] Chika Takami: [ Oh, ehe… Actually, Riko-chan ended up getting sick, so I gotta take care of her! We’re reeeeally sorry! Tell You-chan that I’ll definitely make it up to her! I wish her the best of luck <3 Thanks, Yoshiko-chan! ]

Yoshiko paused her reading, rolling her eyes. She got that Riko’s health was important, and that she and Chika were neighbors, but still… She was feeling really bad for You. She had something planned for later, didn’t she? She just hoped that You wouldn’t let this upset her too much. But even now, she couldn’t help but feel annoyed at Chika. Why couldn’t she understand how much she meant to You?

Fallen Angel Yohane: [ It’s YOHANE ] Fallen Angel Yohane: [ And you’d better make it up to her. Just make sure Riko feels better soon, at least ]

She sighed as she slipped her phone back into her pocket, and her friends seemed to notice that she looked a little upset. “Yoshiko-chan, what’s wrong, zura?” Hanamaru asked. Yoshiko barely had time to react before a pair of hands grabbed her shoulders, squeezing a little too hard. “Yoshiko-chaaaan, it’s such a SHINY day! Even if a couple of us are missing, we still need to support our You-chan and have lots of fun~” Mari got closer, something that seemed to annoy Dia as she pried the blonde off of Yoshiko. “Mari-san, get off of her. Can’t you be still for more than five minutes?” She was already missing the extra help from Kanan, who had long separated from the group and moved closer to the front to get a better view of the match.

Ruby watched everything silently, only speaking up once everyone calmed down. “M-Mari-chan is right… We still have most of Aqours here, don’t we? It’s a shame that Riko-chan got sick, but You-chan wouldn’t want to see you upset… She wants us to have fun.” She offered Yoshiko a small smile.

“R-Right… I guess so.” Yoshiko looked away, gazing out at the pool. It was a nice day, after all. She didn’t want to let anything bother her, and she wanted to support You in every way she could. She needed to be happy for her. She couldn’t be selfish.

There were five main components that made up the scoring of a dive. You had memorized them years ago, drilled into her by coaches and trainers to the point that she could recite them backwards and forwards. Quickly retying her hair up into her swim cap, those five criteria should have been the only things on her mind. Anything else was a distraction that would lead to mistakes. 

In some ways, there were a lot of similarities between diving and performing as an idol. You didn’t consider herself a particularly intelligent person, so she wasn’t sure she could pinpoint it exactly, but surely there were technical qualities to singing and dancing as well. It was why two voices could sound so perfect when pitched harmonically, but why even one just slightly out-of-step produced something so dissonant and ugly.

But in other ways, her two hobbies couldn’t be more different. Performing was all about expression. Onstage, You poured her entire heart into each step and every hitch of vibrato in her voice. Technical proficiency was still important, naturally, but heart and passion were just as necessary. Diving... wasn’t like that at all. That wasn’t to say that You didn’t love it; she did. But, from the moments where she began to ascend the ladder to the board to when she broke through the water, diving was about perfection. It was the only place where she could feel like that. She was an average, ordinary girl from an average, ordinary town, with average, ordinary grades and an average, ordinary life. Even in Aqours, she was only average. Not the best singer, nor the best dancer, not the cutest, nor the most beautiful. Average.

“You Watanabe, Uranohoshi Girl’s School 2nd Year. First Dive.”

1) Approach

It was only natural that she felt that way. Diving had been her passion since childhood, while being a school idol had only happened in the past year. It was a learned love, born from... well, born from a love of her best friend, and a desire to do something together with her. Something that was theirs, something they could share and look back on together.

Her steps were slower than usual, and shakier. Poor form brought on by overthinking.

2) Take-Off

But then Riko had joined, and then the first years. Everything frenzied, writing songs, sewing costumes, planning shows. It had gone so much faster than You could have ever expected, and her hopes and dreams of something small and intimate were dashed before they were even fully-formed.

The board was already slick from those that had come before, and she nearly slipped as she shifted her weight and bounced the board, having to flail her hands to correct herself before she jumped.

3) Elevation

She could never begrudge them their success. If nothing else, then her friends deserved as large a platform as possible to shine as brightly as she knew they could. Big personalities like Mari, Yoshiko, and Chika deserved to be seen and heard by everyone. Hard workers like Kanan, Dia, and Riko deserved recognition and respect. Even Hanamaru and Ruby, quiet and well-behaved girls who would never push for stardom, deserved to have their special unique qualities recognized. Yet, Aqours’ ascension, further complicated by the danger to the school, brought stress. They were supposed to rely on each other, nine voices and nine hearts together, but there was only one heart that beat in-sync with Chika’s, only one voice that she wanted to hear when she was at her lowest. And it wasn’t You’s anymore.

She didn’t get enough height. Whether she’d mis-timed her jump, or her positioning had been off, she wasn’t sure, but You knew she was lacking. She definitely couldn’t complete her scheduled motions in the time she had, so she’d need to remove a rotation or a twist in order to land it.

4) Execution

You had always been a support-type person. She was the girl with a shoulder to cry on, or kind words to reassure, or a silly joke to cut the tension. Where had she lost her touch? She knew what she could do, so when had it all gone wrong? Things that had always been so easy for her now seemed out of reach, and when she fell short in pursuit, it left her in a worse place than she’d been when she’d started. The most important relationship in her life felt like it was falling apart before her eyes, and she had no control.

No, she could still land it. She could still land it if she was perfect. She was athletic and limber, and months of dance practice had to have made her better... But her body refused to move the way she wanted it to, refused to break the laws of physics for her benefit. She was running out of time, unless she could-

5) Entry

She hit the water flat on her stomach, having under-rotated. It hurt, of course, but her knee felt worse than her chest. Face-down in the water, she took a few moments to collect herself. If her face was soaked, it wouldn’t look like she was crying, right? At least with Chika absent, You didn’t have to worry about her best friend seeing such an abject failure.

Why hadn’t she come?

Slowly, she swam over to the side, dredging herself up out of the pool and feeling like pondscum as she limped back to the line for the second flight of dives. She didn’t bother looking at the five-judge panel, and the ringing in her ears mercifully kept the announced score from her. Whatever it was, it wasn’t good enough.

Just like she wasn’t good enough.

[captainwatanabae-blog]

devilishidol:

“Well, I… suppose you’re right about that.” Yoshiko had already given up, arms flat at her sides as she allowed her friend to tie the scarf around her neck. She tried not to make it too obvious that she was embarrassed, but her very red face was making that difficult. On the other hand, she was also hoping that she wasn’t actually getting sick or anything like that… Sneezing didn’t always mean something was wrong with you, right?

The scarf, though, was incredibly cute. It made sense that You would own something like it, and Yoshiko briefly wondered if she made it herself. It fit her so well, but Numazu was also a seaside town. So on second thought, it wouldn’t exactly be rare to see something like it being sold in a shop somewhere.

Yoshiko swallowed hearing You’s compliment, and it definitely didn’t work to make her any less embarrassed. Even as someone who cared a lot about fashion and what she wore, the scarf clashing with her outfit was the last thing she was worried about at the moment. “Ah… hehe, you think so? Well, naturally– I can make any combination work.” It was hard to be as confident as she usually was when in a situation like this.

“Eh? Hold onto it? Are you sure?” Not that Yoshiko minded; she certainly didn’t. It was nice that You trusted her with her things and all, and Yoshiko was usually pretty good with not losing stuff. “I see… I’ll wash it for you and put it in a safe place. Then I’ll clean up your sewing materials and organize everything for when you come back. I think you’ll owe me for doing all that, though.” She managed to joke a little, but her gaze shifted to the side in thought as she covered the lower half of her face with You’s scarf. When would You even come back, though…?

Her footsteps slowed to a stop as they reached a familiar place. It was near the bus stop where they usually got off to walk home after school. A bit closer to Yoshiko’s apartment than You’s house, but still a fair, short walking distance either way. They would always say their goodbyes for the day and separate around here, and today was probably no different. She was sad to see it end, though.

“I guess this is it for today, huh?” She asked, turning to fully face her friend.

“Owe you? You think so? Mmmmm...” You tapped at her cheek. What did she have to give Yoshiko that would be worth that? “Well, maybe I can work on making you a special costume for your streams, if you want?” It didn’t really dawn on her that maybe her friend hadn’t been serious about that, but considering the most literal explanation first was how You went through life. “Or if that doesn’t work for you, then we can come up with something else.”

Having every intention of hanging out with her junior again sometime soon, You didn’t worry at all about when exactly it might be. She was going to be busy in the next week anyway, so it wasn’t like she would have time to even use her sewing supplies. That Aqours costumes were done for the foreseeable future (at least until the next big PV or performance or something like that) similarly kept her workload at a more manageable level. If she were to pick them up next week, after the swim meet, it would probably be fine.

Noticing that Yoshiko had slowed, You stopped as well. "Ah, we’re here.” Due to their conversation, she hadn’t really been paying attention to where they were going, so the appearance of the bus stop seemed to come out of nowhere. She was lucky to have Yoshiko around, or else she might have walked right past it.

It was a big of a strange thing to say, even coming from someone that You was used to hearing strange things from. It was just a usual farewell, wasn’t it? But there seemed to be something else in her junior’s voice... or maybe You was just hearing things. Her instinct was to ask and try and figure out if something was bothering the other girl, but they had spent the whole day together, and maybe Yoshiko was just getting tired of her. If it was something important, You was sure it would come up again.

Instead, she just nodded. “Mmhmm, it’s getting pretty late. But I’ll see you at school, and then at my meet next weekend?” With a smile and a wave, she stepped past Yoshiko, off in the direction of her house. “Later, then!”

Needles and Thread

[captainwatanabae-blog]

devilishidol:

Yoshiko was relieved when her crying seemed to go unnoticed. She felt a little bad for lying, in a way, to You, but it was better than having the girl worry about her. She didn’t really think she was worth You’s concern anyway. Yoshiko’s problems were her own, after all.

“Ah… Thank you…” She replied, taking the tissues. She continued with her act by blowing her nose into one, which was pointless on its own since she was feeling physically fine. She was lucky that You was pretty handy, though she hated wasting something that she had been kind enough to give her.

“D-Don’t be sorry… We’ll be home soon anyway, right? I had fun dressing up with you, so that’s what really matters.” In fact, she should probably be the one apologizing in the first place for having this kind of fashion sense… The dresses were cute, sure. You was the one who made them after all, and her work was always so thoughtful and crafty. Still, they weren’t the most subtle or practical things in the world, and that was suddenly clear to her now. If Yoshiko really was cold, it wouldn’t be a very fun experience.

She blinked at her senior as she handed her the scarf, and she looked down at it for a moment before looking back at her. This was a really sweet gesture, and she felt especially bad now. “A-Are you sure? I mean, aren’t you cold too? I… I don’t want to leave you with nothing. I didn’t bring anything that could help you at all, s-so…” You probably wasn’t cold, but she wasn’t sure if she wanted to take the scarf, even if it was just for a few minutes or something.

It was… kinda embarrassing for Yoshiko to just wear something that belonged to You, and so easily too. Maybe she was making too big a deal of this, but being the way she was, it was pretty hard to help it.

She cleared her throat, “W-What I’m trying to say is… it’s very considerate of you to try tending to Yohane’s needs like this, but I am above such things!” Yoshiko then proceeded to sneeze, but it was actually genuine. Her bad luck must be coming to haunt her now…

It had mostly been a casual suggestion, but when Yoshiko sneezed, You started to seem a little concerned. “Eheh... It’s not like I’m using it, so it’s no problem if you do, right?” It wasn’t a big deal, especially for such a short walk. Or was the issue that the a nautical-themed scarf with cute little anchors didn’t really fit her aesthetic? Well either way, You was through listening to arguments, and flourished the scarf up and over her junior’s head, tying it neatly around her neck with a laugh and a smile.

“Operation Cold Prevention is a go-soro~” It actually looked pretty good on Yoshiko, too, but she supposed that shouldn’t have come as a surprise. The younger girl had a slender figure and naturally beautiful features, so probably almost everything looked good on her. She’d noticed since it was so easy to design outfits for her. “It’s really fine, since I’m not cold at all. If you exercise a lot, you’re always warmed up, and if you’re always warmed up, you’ll never get cold!”

With the two of them both dressed in Yoshiko’s (or rather, Yohane’s) signature fashion, it was kind of neat to see something so classically You on her friend, even if it was just a silly anchor-print scarf. They’d all worn the gothic outfits for their (admittedly, ill-fated) PV, but You wondered if they could do something more in her style at some point. Pirates? Swashbucklers? Maybe even the Japanese Maritime Self Defense Force? Er, on second thought, maybe that last one would be more ‘uniform’ than ‘costume’, and she was hardly eager to re-live that conversation.

“Besides, it looks good on you,” You concluded, tilting her head in Yoshiko’s direction while they walked. “If you’re worried about it clashing, or something like that.” Although they both lived in the city, it wasn’t as though they lived right next to each other, and they were quickly approaching the place where it would make sense to go their separate ways. If she’d known it was going to get so late, You would have planned better, since her sewing supplies were still at Yoshiko’s apartment...

“Hmm,” she hummed to herself. “Actually, you should hold onto it! I’m probably just going to go home without my stuff, but I want to think about doing something with that kind of print. If I take it home, it’ll probably get lost in my room somewhere, hehe...” At least if she were left to her own devices. “But if it’s at your house, then it’ll be there when we hang out next!”

Needles and Thread

[captainwatanabae-blog]

devilishidol:

Yoshiko made a small noise of surprise when You pulled her closer, forcing her to look up at her, and she smiled, though a bit nervously; she did feel a little reassured knowing that You had fun and would make time for her, but she also missed the point. Which, of course, couldn’t be helped. It wasn’t like You knew what was going on in her head, after all. To Yoshiko, it wasn’t all about just hanging out, or being friends. She hadn’t been really just been talking about the swim meet itself when mentioning it. She always hoped for the best for You, but…

Yoshiko did have some hard feelings towards Chika, she wasn’t going to lie. Perhaps it wasn’t really her fault that she was so dense, but now that Yoshiko had an idea of what was happening with Aqours’ second years, it all seemed a little unfair. She could tell that Chika and Riko were getting closer, and that You felt left out. She already knew how that felt, and of course, it didn’t feel any better when you held feelings that went further than that of just friendship.

“You really are a good friend, you know. Aha…” She said sincerely, laughing. Yet, she had to blink a few times to realize that she had tears in her eyes. She lifted a hand to her face to try and wipe them away before You saw anything, but it seemed that a few had already dripped down her cheek, and she hadn’t even felt anything until then.

“Ugh…” She sniffled as she tried to think of some kind of excuse. She never really had the best control of her emotions, but it rarely went this far. There was a lot going on in her mind, and she was feeling too much at once– sadness, happiness, loneliness, gratitude…

“I hope I’m not catching a cold… Maybe we should’ve brought jackets with us.” Yeah, that made no sense. It wasn’t even that cold.

“Mm.” You’s instinct was to play off the compliment in some way, if not outright reject it, but somehow she sensed that Yoshiko needed this moment. Obviously something was upsetting her, or she was dealing with something that she didn’t want anyone else to know about. Even someone as ordinary and simple-minded as You herself could see that, having caught the younger girl wiping at her eyes when she thought she was being sneaky about it. “You’re a good friend too.”

When her friend changed the subject so abruptly, You wasn’t quite sure how to take it. She could just be trying to cover for her sniffling... But then again, You was used to colder weather, so maybe it had gotten colder and she hadn’t even noticed? It was best to be on the safe side, and so she reached into her small bag and drew out a small pack of tissues. “If you’re feeling a little sick, you can use these.” She motioned for Yoshiko to take them.

But what to do about the weather? To be honest, it felt like a normal day to her, with the cool ocean breeze providing a comforting contrast to the usual heat. Yoshiko was probably more used to staying inside though, not having sports commitments that would keep her out late. As she thought of what to do, You realized that she had a light scarf in her bag, balled up from last time she’d been out. She silently thanked her mom for always nagging her about it.

“Yeah, maybe jackets would have been a good idea,” You agreed. “Sorry... It was my idea for us to wear the dresses, wasn’t it? That probably wasn’t the smartest thing if we were going to stay out this late.” The scarf was thin and wouldn’t offer much in the way of warmth... but something was better than nothing, right? “Here, take this scarf, too.”

Needles and Thread

[captainwatanabae-blog]

devilishidol:

Yoshiko frowned stubbornly at her friend, not seeming to notice the other girl’s embarrassment. She shook her head, deciding to be insistent with her desire to pay. “I-I told you, don’t worry about it. It’s my treat! And besides, it wasn’t that expensive. You should never doubt Yohane, especially when it comes to such trivial matters.”

She stood from her seat, and You’s words prompted a glance in her direction. She blushed as she noticed her friend’s extended arm, and briefly considered rejecting the offer. Of course, she couldn’t find a good enough reason or excuse to do so, and instead gave in, linking her arm with You’s own. “R-Right… I wouldn’t mind spending a little more time with you. I mean, I guess…”

As they made their way outside, they were greeted by the faintly chilly air of the early evening, and were surrounded by the rich hues of the fading sun. It was just a typical sunset in Numazu, something that came and went everyday. And yet, it didn’t feel so typical. Not tonight. Walking side by side with You, and sharing a certain closeness with her was a feeling that she felt she would never be able to replicate again. It was odd, and somehow made her feel a little nervous.

“You know… if I’m being completely honest, I had a lot of fun with you today.” It wasn’t really often that she was honest about her feelings with others, or even with herself, but she wanted You to know that. It was fun, whether they were hanging around Yoshiko’s apartment and fixing up her dress, or sitting in a cute café together, enjoying a parfait.

“I know you’d probably prefer to be with Chika right now,” or probably anyone else in Aqours, really, “and I’m sure you’ll be a little busier after everything goes well at your swim meet, but I think we should try doing this again sometime.”

“I had a lot of fun with you too, Yoshiko-chan,” came You’s reply, but she quickly fell silent as her friend continued to speak. It was true, she supposed, that she wished she was with Chika... But that longing was all-encompassing, it wasn’t like it was the sort of thing she could just turn off. It was general, rather than specific, and just because she felt that way didn’t mean she didn’t love spending time with her junior. And actually, although You didn’t consider herself a bitter or unkind person, it was nice to be around someone who seemed to always want to see her, rather than increasingly seeing her as some kind of back-up best friend.

“You don’t need to compare yourself to her.” Although she had no idea why Yoshiko was bringing up Chika at a time like this, You still felt the need to try and reassure her. “We’re all special in our own way, right? We all shine differently.” Some brighter than others... By which she meant everyone brighter than herself, but someone had to support everyone else. Besides, she was a star in the water, wasn’t she? It would be greedy to want that for herself on land as well.

Pushing down those feelings of inadequacy, she gave a nod and tugged Yoshiko closer into herself. “I’ll make time for you, Yoshiko-chan. Even if I make it to nationals for swim and dive, and even if we make it to Love Live, I’ll always make time for you, okay?” She wasn’t sure why the younger girl suddenly seemed so melancholy, but she was determined to do her best to try and cheer her up.

Pointing ahead, still with Yoshiko hooked around her arm, she gave a smile. “Friendship full steam ahead, Yousoro~”

Needles and Thread

[captainwatanabae-blog]

devilishidol:

“I…I suppose that’s true. Sorry for assuming, then.” Yoshiko replied, an edge of shyness to her voice as some of her embarrassment remained. Yoshiko was indeed a “special” girl, and she thought so personally, even. All of her friends, though, had a quality that stood out, and she truly thought so. Sure, she might’ve appreciated some more than others, but it was a fact.

“But, heh, you know me! I’d never go as far as to imitate someone else, let alone any human! Not the great Yohane! Not for a thousand eternities! I’ll have you know that I will indeed remain this way, even when I’m damned to hell!” She said boastfully, her mood doing a 180. It was sudden, but it was her own way of wanting to reinforce You’s points.

She then let out a deep breath and smiled lightly, calm now, and with a quick glance out the window, Yoshiko could see the sun just starting to set. It was a pretty, but almost sad sight, signifying that these few hours with You were coming to a close. Of course, she still had her swim meet to go to this weekend, but it had just been really nice to spend some time alone with her like this.

“Well, I think we might be ready to leave, don’t you think? I’m sure you’re a little tired at this point.” At least, it didn’t seem like either of them were still hungry, or going to finish the parfait for that matter. And so, Yoshiko managed to get ahold of the bill and covered it fully. It wasn’t so expensive, and definitely nothing she couldn’t handle.

Watching Yoshiko’s sudden reversal with a wide smile, You gave a firm, excited nod. “Then let’s make it a deal, okay? Or a...” What was the kind of word that Yoshiko would use? A bargain? A contract? “A pact! That we won’t change, even when you’re damned to hell, and I’m... uh... Sailing the high seas!” Not that You would necessarily want to stay the same person forever. No, there were definitely a lot of things about herself that she’d change if she could... but then again, if Yoshiko liked her the way she was, then she couldn’t really be that bad, right?

As the other girl’s gaze drifted towards the window, You’s water-blue eyes naturally followed. Ah, it was starting to get late. Funny, it didn’t really seem like they’d been hanging out all that long, from what You had originally come over to help fix her friend’s dress, but she guessed that was what happened when she had tons of fun. Her childhood was filled with days that she stayed so late at Chika’s having fun that she missed the last bus, and needed to be drive home by one of her sisters, after all.

Grabbing one final large spoonful of ice cream in a last-ditch effort to avoid defeat, You eventually sighed and nodded in surrender. “Ehehe, I’m actually as full of energy as ever, but if we stayed out until I was tired, I’d definitely get yelled at.” Like any good athlete, You slept well, ate well, and exercised well, so she prided herself on her energy... Even if being a school idol pushed her to her limit. “So you’re probably right.”

Despite Yoshiko’s repeated insistence that it was no issue, a flush of red at You’s cheeks betrayed her embarrassment as her junior payed. Tapping the tips of her index fingers together, she wriggled her lips back and forth. “Thanks. Once I get my pocket money next month, I’ll make sure to pay you back first, so I don’t spend it all hehe...”

She smoothed the ruffles of her gothic lolita-inspired dress as she stood up, and beamed with a full face grin. “We’ve still got at least a little while left though, right? It’s not like we can’t take our time getting back.” She held out her arm, crooked at the elbow, motioning for her junior to lock her own arm with it. 

Needles and Thread

[captainwatanabae-blog]

Super stylin

Original Artist: @_ibk14 on twitter

[captainwatanabae-blog]

devilishidol:

Awaiting an answer, Yoshiko’s expression looked completely serious, and a hint of impatience made itself quickly apparent. Her body went stiff in both nervousness and anticipation. You seemed to be taking a while, and she thought maybe that was because she had to really think about it. That wasn’t really a good sign if that was the case… Perhaps Yoshiko wasn’t really all that “sweet” at all?

For just a moment, Yoshiko’s eyes closed in disappointment. Feeling the second year’s fingers lace with her own, she once again looked at her, and her gaze immediately softened at the smile she wore. It was almost unfair how much of an affect You had on her.

It was then that You’s answer began to sink in. She wasn’t really sure if being a good listener or being there for her friends was all that special. If she didn’t support her friends, how much of a good friend would she be? Of course though, with You, it was a little different from that. Well, from her perspective at least.

Simply put, Yoshiko wanted the girl she liked to be happy, even if it meant potentially ruining any chances she had to be with her. She wanted to listen to her problems, and be there for her in her good moments just as much as her bad. She just…needed to always see that beaming smile of hers. So, You was right about that.

As for being smart and thoughtful, though… Sure, thoughtful was one thing, but smart was another. For a weird, and sometimes very impulsive girl like her, a title like that seemed hard to acquire. For You though, it was the opposite. She was much more thoughtful or smart than Yoshiko could ever hope to be.

And without thinking, she stood, enveloping You’s hand in both of hers and squeezing gently. “T-That’s not true! You’re the smartest and most thoughtful person I know! And not only that, you’re really kind to everyone, talented at a lot of things, and so pretty too! It’s no wonder you’re so popular with everyone… I wish I could be a little more like you, you know!” She retorted, as if forgetting they were in public. She just couldn’t bear to see You feeling down on herself, even if just a little bit.

After a few moments, her face went red once realizing everything she said, and she quietly sat back down. She looked ashamed as she let go of You’s hand. “Haa…forgive me if I startled you. But that’s truly what I think. And so many others think the same too. I’m sure of it. I just…don’t want you to think badly of yourself at all.”

Despite having given the illusion of having to think hard, the truth was that speaking kindly about her junior came easily to You. The words tumbled out with no resistance, and while the first things that had sprung to mind were her kindness and friendship, that was hardly all there was. When Yoshiko seemed disappointed in her answer, You’s smile began to fade, and she rushed to correct herself.

“That’s not-” Suddenly, her hand was covered and held carefully, as if it were something precious and worth protecting. It was startling, even for someone who was as open to public affection as You, and her cheeks flushed red as she looked up at the other girl. Her instinct was to jerk her hand away, and she couldn’t stop herself from lightly tugging back. Still, she caught herself before she fully pried her hand free, and instead just allowed Yoshiko to hold it.

“M-me? Popular?” She supposed that she did get along with most people... But that didn’t necessarily make her popular, did it? Surely Chika and Riko both were more popular than she was, and that was without talking about Mari, Kanan, maybe even Dia and Ruby... For some reason, that compliment stuck out more than the rest, but she didn’t particularly agree with any of them. She definitely wasn’t very thoughtful, and if anyone thought she was smart, they obviously hadn’t seen her report card. Kind, maybe, but no more so than anyone else. Admittedly, she was talented at swim and dive... But that was just one thing, and she considered herself extraordinarily ordinary at almost everything else. And pretty?

It seemed that neither of them was graceful when it came to receiving praise, or maybe You just wanted to hear such words from a special someone. Would Chika tell her she was pretty, or thoughtful, in such a heartfelt way? It didn’t really seem like her nature. She was more the type to make a joke or compliment something silly. Then again, sometimes the way Chika talked about...

You shook her head as Yoshiko returned to her seat. “No, it’s alright, it wasn’t startling,” she lied, having noticed the embarrassment on her friend’s face. “But I think you have it all wrong. It’s not that I think badly of myself, or anything like that.” That was true, in a way. She didn’t think of herself as particularly useless or unlikable. Instead, it was just that she was an average girl (mostly), surrounded by eight other girls who shined so radiantly. It was easy to be drowned out by their shine, but it wasn’t like there was anything wrong with being average.

“And besides... I wouldn’t want you to be more like me.” That she was sure of. There was nothing wrong with average, but the world was full of it. “Someone special and unique like the fallen angel Yohane should always be herself, don’t you think? I’d rather she stay the way she is, rather than trying to imitate anyone else.”

Needles and Thread