cartergoesnorth

[cartergoesnorth]

First-ish Year of College

Surviving two terms at a new school is no easy feat, it's a fucking challenge itself. Attending community college did not prepare me for the cluster fuck that is Portland State University with cramming so much information in my head, searching for free food, and of course......the boys.

I was not ready for the intensive course work or the critical notes from professors in 300 upper division classes, as my writing has been noted to be “cold” or plainly just “disappointing.” I wanted to cry the first time I received notes on my first research paper, it was a punch to the gut.

I’ve also been forcing myself to work two jobs as a side hustle because living on water and free coffee donuts is not a way to live and I hate asking my parents for money every time I run out as they themselves are covering my expensive tuition, minus the scholarships I earned, and fucking up their credit scores. I should have just stayed in-state but there is no turning back now. Attending 4-5 classes a term and working 3-4 times a week is exhausting and emotionally draining. Safe care is always important ladies and gentlemen.

Honestly, I’ve grown to love Portland since moving here. It’s so much different than the small town where I came from and I don’t think I would have ever known that I love Greek and Thai food, like who knew because I for sure didn’t fucking know that.

Dating in college is messy. That I knew and of course gay dating is just as toxic and terrible as it was back home. Honestly, I am envious of straight girls and their lovey-dovey love stories of how they meet cute boys at Victors (dining hall on campus) or at the library of all places and I live for the funny Tinder dates and awkward chance encounters. As a gay man in college in the dating era of Tinder, I am left with Grindr. The dark seedy corner of gay internet where chances of finding a man who actually wants to be in an LTR rather than hooking up are very slim. Also, one night stands are awkward as hell when you see the dude constantly around campus all of a sudden. Like I never saw you before, now I see you fucking everywhere.

To all who are planning on attending PSU next year, you got this and you do belong here just like all the promotional posters around campus say. Also put your keys on the fucking lanyard, you will lose your keys otherwise, trust me and use every available service on campus. Milk that shit just like this school is milking you financially dry. Pee after sex, drink a lot of water while drinking to minimize the hangover and try to make friends during the first week, these will be your friends for the next year or so because after that it's fucking hard to make friends.