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Swords

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This energy though

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⚔️

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ugh fine. i'll go jerk off to something unethical and gross

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infinite tea dragon for all your tea needs:)

[prompt: tea, butterfly, wyrm]

kinda following @kmccaigue 's list:)

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From my bestie in Thailand. The second sign went up hours later

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>be an 8th grade English teacher

>have an asocial student who draws on all her tests

>hey at least she doesn't do it on scantrons

>start leaving compliments towards her art when i grade her papers

>fast forward a few months

>notice she's drawing on her test as I'm doing my rounds around the class

>ask her what she's drawing

>this thirteen year old emo girl looks up at me with the wettest eyes I have ever seen

>"you if you were in Family Guy."

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asking "hey is it fine if I smoke in here" and before you're able to answer I've already set up a full rack of salmon over a fire in your living room

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Gregory House staring at the camera after ruining two marriages, stealing a child’s candy and making a sexist remark to a pregnant woman

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HINT: you can move my white ass using the arrow keys.

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Bell Swamp Connection, The Mountain Goats [x]

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fossil record patisserie

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i go to bars and coffee shops and breweries and libraries and thrift stores all the time by myself and i have a chill banger time i love my own company. so why is the grocery store a warzone. im fighting for my life. barely make it out alive. if someone even looks at me i want to blow them up with my mind

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not to be insensitive but some of the salem witch trials were so funny bitches like “i saw her at the devils sacrament!!!” girl... what were YOU doing at the devils sacrament 👀

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I think the historical treatment of left handed people is objectively the funniest form of bigotry mankind has ever displayed