catch-me-hello

[catch-me-hello]

Stray Kids, Episode 2:  so don’t stop, we like this party

Mission time, STAYs!  Now that our fearless leader, Bang Chan, has gotten his team to pre-debut status, he has to write and produce a song.  No biggie.  Let’s do this.

We begin at the dorm, where our boys are wheeling in their luggage and settling in.  Is that a bed in the living room?  I don’t know how these guys are going to get any sleep.

We get several minutes of everyone deciding on roommates.  This goes on for quite a while.  It’s such a tiny space for nine guys.  Beds are crammed into every available space.  If this group were any bigger, they’d be sleeping on the roof.  One of the rooms has six beds in it.

I’m sorry, but this alone would keep me out of K-pop.

JYP:  Congratulations!  Your group is going to debut!

Me:   oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god

JYP:  Here’s your dorm.  You’ll be sharing with eight other girls.  You get the top bunk two inches from the ceiling.

Me:

JYP:  (looking around) Where’d she go?

My bandmates:  She left.  She decided to be a delivery driver for Pizza School instead.  Dibs on the cot in the living room!

Once the boys settle in, they decide to name the rooms, because it’s not like they should be writing their first mission song or anything.  Nothing but time on their hands.  Then they check out the kitchen and discover that none of them can cook.  Well, Bang Chan offers to make Spaghetti Bolognese, but he doesn’t remember how.  Woojin knows his way around the kitchen, but we know he’s leaving the group at some point, so our boys will starve unless there’s a Pizza School nearby.

They play games in the living room, and seriously, why aren’t they writing a song?  When is this assignment due?  Back in the kitchen, three of our guys have started cooking, and I realize we’re about to get a mukbang segment.

Our boys slurp up the pasta.  Then they decide to clean up and go to an arcade.  I’m hoping “arcade” is Korean slang for “recording studio” because they haven’t written a single lyric and I AM STRESSING OUT.  (Why yes, I do have OCD.  Why do you ask?)

Off they go to the arcade, and this place looks pretty cool.

They have fun with basketball, archery, and soccer.  They’re bonding.  Despite my song deadline anxiety, I do enjoy watching this segment.  I could spend hours in that arcade.  Especially if it had Skee-ball.  Next, they head out to a road lined with food trucks.  I love how they call big cheesy hot dogs “snacks.”

Finally, we cut to the JYP Building.  The boys huddle to discuss their song.  Not only do they have to write it, they have to choreograph and perform it for JYP himself.  Of course, Bang Chan has already prepared some tracks.  I can’t believe I ever doubted him.

The boys like one of the tracks a lot.  It’s an ominous, moody piece called “Elevator.”  What I like about all the tracks is the dark, mysterious vibe they all have.  A couple are kind of scary sounding, reminding me of the Stray Kids song “Venom.”  So not only is Bang Chan our daring and fearless leader, he’s also responsible for the shivers down your spine when you hear “Side Effects” or “Double Knot.”

He now works on modifying the track to fit nine members.  I like watching this.  It gives us insight into his creative process and how his mind works.  He immediately starts looking for a melody in the sound.  He improvises a melody and then immediately discards it for not packing enough of a dramatic punch.  Meanwhile, Han and Changbin are in another room, working on lyrics.  They want to write about blood, sweat, and tears, and now the song “Spinning Wheel” is stuck in my head because I am old.

In keeping with the dark theme, our lyricists decide to change the song title to “Hellevator.”  STAYs know this song as the group’s first music video and digital single.  I watch the official video, and all nine members are in it, so it looks like we’re not losing Woojin during this show.

We’re now four days from D-Day.  Bang Chan has mixed everything and is ready to present it to his bandmates.  I love how everyone excitedly gathers around to hear it.

The show doesn’t let us hear the whole track.  When we cut to the end, the group is excited and ready to assign parts.  They’re a little nervous about the high notes on the chorus and ask Han to try it, along with the rapping.  Han is stressed out about taking both parts.  Is there no one else in the group who can hit high notes?

But Han is game to try it and starts rehearsing.  He’s struggling with the vocals, but at least he’s got great style.  I want this sweater.

Now we cut to two days until D-Day.  Choreo rehearsal.  Lee Know is leading the group.

The routine looks exhausting, with the group doing formations while lying flat on the floor and slowly rising.  From the dramatic music to the demanding vocals to the very physical choreography, these guys are not phoning it in.

The pressure must be getting to Bang Chan again, because he gets frustrated with I.N, who is having trouble with some of the moves.  Everyone is getting tense.  I can’t believe I’m suggesting this, but maybe they should all go back to the arcade.

As the hours tick down, they practice nonstop.  Finally, we’re at D-Day.  They report to the performance room, looking like they’re about to face the firing squad, and in a way, they are.  Here he comes now.

JYP is smiling and trying to put the boys at ease.  He’s a bit confused by the title of this song, which tells me this man is NOT prepared for the beast idol group these guys will become.  To his credit, he does like the title, once they explain it to him.

Next, he says, “I also asked you to think of a team name.”  What?  I must have missed that part.  This should be VERY interesting.  Especially since group names are usually revealed to the group by the company in the series finale.  I’ve never seen a company let the group choose their own name.

Our boys look very excited.  Bang Chan counts to three (“hana, dhul, set!”) and they all bow and loudly introduce themselves.

“Hello, we’re Stray Kids!”

I get a thrill out of this.  It’s a historic moment for the fandom.  And I love that they don’t introduce themselves politely like so many groups do.  They belt it out like you would expect a gang of stray kids to do.

JYP looks intrigued.  Bang Chan tells him, “The meaning is we’re lost kids who are still finding our dreams.  We’re still seeking our goals.”

JYP likes it, but he’s concerned that it’s a long name.  I check the JYP Entertainment roster, and yeah, I’m looking at ITZY, Day 6, NMIXX, GOT7, and of course, 2am and 2pm.  However, the roster also has Wonder Girls and Xdinary Heroes, and Stray Kids is a shorter name than both of them.

If I may digress for a second while looking at this roster, why do so many K-pop band names look like typos?  Jus2, Vcha, NiziU … and I just finished recapping the survival show for idid, a name I really, really hate.  So I’m glad Stray Kids stuck to their guns here.  My spell checker is working overtime, underlining every other name on the roster.

Okay.  No more stalling.  The name of the group won’t matter if the performance isn’t good.  Showtime!

It’s good.  I can see there are issues (mostly the high notes), but I see the strong energy, wild choreo, and serious attitude all starting to come together.  They need more confidence, and they need to bring the notes down an octave or ten.  Speaking of which, I can hear that Felix is starting to use the lower register of his voice.  It’s not ocean deep yet, but it’s deeper than it was before, in the showcase. 

When it ends, JYP doesn’t speak for several minutes.  When he does, he says the song is really good.  The title, lyrics, arrangement, and melody – he likes it all.

Now for the bad news.  He pulls up a keyboard app on his phone, which is so cool and I want one.  He plays a line from the melody and asks Bang Chan why he wrote it in a “female key.”  (As an alto, I feel like I caught a stray.)

“The range is ridiculous!” he says.  “This would be the end of our country’s best singing ability’s range!”  Weirdly, I understand what he means.

He tells Bang Chan to fix the key.  Then he pauses and says, “Right now, only one person is up to my standards.  Jisung [Han] did better than I thought.”  He praises Han for singing as well as he raps.  Han tries to smile, but he feels bad for the rest of his bandmates.

Bang Chan gets the same criticism as before – he needs to show more charisma.  And then the other shoe drops.  JYP reminds them that any member who can’t keep up with the others will be eliminated.  We get this dramatic godlike shot right after he says it.

Gulp.

Well, that ended on a downer.  Even though I know how this turns out in the end, I still feel scared for them right now. 

See you next episode, where I’m guessing we’ll eventually see Bang Chan get more charismatic and learn to write notes for boys (and for me, apparently).  Bye for now!

[catch-me-hello]

Stray Kids, Episode 1:  our own game that no one can copy

We’re going way back for this one.  The year is 2017.  COVID hasn’t happened yet.  Brexit is happening, but no one can figure out why or how.  Beyoncé is pregnant with twins.  Kendall Jenner has ended racism forever with a Pepsi commercial.  And over in South Korea, one of the biggest K-pop bands in the world has already been formed, before their survival show has even started. 

That’s right.  This show is going to be different.  Not only are the competing groups already formed, but one of them is a girl group.  This will be my first time writing about a girl group.  There’s going to be a lot to unpack.  Let’s get started.

First, since this is JYP Entertainment, let’s welcome back the man himself, the one who sent our 2pm and 2am trainees to get beaten up on an island as a gift.  Hello, Mr. Park Jin-Young!

JYP tells us his company is under pressure to produce a new group.  So he’s setting up a trainee showcase where a girl group and boy group will compete.  The girl group is called 2TEAM.  The other is a self-formed boy group, so far unnamed, led by a veteran trainee named Bang Chan.  And in this very first episode, JYP will pick the debut group to work with, and the rest of the series will focus on that group.  Like I said, this show is going to be different.

We’re wasting no time.  D-Day is here.  I have really missed these one-hour episodes that get right to the point.  We see a young group of junior trainees rehearsing, and then a solo artist named Lily M.  Finally, the main event.  2TEAM gets ready to rehearse.  (Apologies in advance for the grainy screenshots, but I’m working with a YouTube upload.)  They’re a seven-member group, and as they practice, we see the boy group watching them from the audience seats.  We get our first look at Bang Chan.

2TEAM and Bang Chan

He looks worried.  The girls are really talented singers, and this isn’t just dance-pop fluff.  It’s a solid rock beat.  2TEAM is a promising group.  In fact, I like their performance so much, I look them up and am sad to learn they never debuted.  A few of them went on to find success in the K-pop industry, which I find reassuring.  More on that in a minute.

“We need to be nervous about this,” one of the boy trainees mutters as he watches the girls perform.  Dang right.  We get a confessional with this trainee, whose name is Jisung on the show.  As a member of Stray Kids, he goes by the stage name of Han. He knows 2TEAM will be tough competition.  We also meet Changbin, who shares his concern but is a bit distracted by 17 year-old Chaeryeong of 2TEAM, who really stands out.  (She will go on to graduate from Hanlim Multi Arts School and debut with the group ITZY.)

Jisung (Han), Changbin, and Chaeryeong

I want to give these women a spotlight, especially since this is the only time we’ll see them on this show.  We meet 17 year-old Ryujin, an incredible dancer. 

Ryujin

The way this show describes Ryujin gives us a look into gender expectations in the industry.  In a confessional, she describes herself as “kind of like the guy” of the group.  The show then gives us evidence through footage of her with the rest of the group. She says something silly and lightly slaps herself on the cheek.  The subtitles tell us that this is, and I’m quoting, “explosive manly woman charm.”  In another scene, she playfully shakes her finger at another group member.  The subtitles say she is “full of reversal charms that are contrary to her innocent looks.”   She still looks sweet and innocent, just full of spirited, self-depreciating humor, but apparently that’s considered masculine energy.  I find this whole thing fascinating.

Ryujin also stands out for appearing in the BTS teaser video for “Love Yourself.”  She will also go on to debut with ITZY and graduate from the same arts school as Chaeryeong.  That manly explosive energy will take her far.

Next up is Yeji, who leads the group’s rehearsals.  She’ll also debut with ITZY, which means I really should be checking out that group.  Her dancing during the onstage rehearsals cause the guys even more anxiety.  This will not be an easy team to beat.

Yeji

Now it’s the boys’ turn to rehearse.  I count nine members in the group, which is interesting since the current group has eight members.  We learn that Bang Chan has been at JYP the longest, approaching his seventh year.  He does not look old enough to have been training that long, but he does have that world-weary vibe to him.  He’s a kid who has seen too much for his age. 

Then we get a clip of his 2010 JYP audition in his homeland of Australia.  He’s barely larger than the guitar he’s holding.

He’s thirteen years old in that clip.  He’s nineteen or twenty years old at the time of this show and is a little embarrassed that all his fellow JYP trainees he came up with have gone on to debut, and he’s still here.  He’s desperate to debut.

We watch him lead his group’s rehearsal with a parental type of authority.  We learn that he and current teammates Han and Changbin are part of a self-produced rap group called 3RACHA. (I’m going to use the stage names in these recaps to help me keep everyone straight.)  I know I’ve mentioned the self-produced part before, but that’s because it’s really impressive.  And not that common.  Not all entertainment companies encourage this.  Many prefer that the group members record the songs they’re given.  Some groups have to prove themselves before being allowed to contribute to the songwriting and production.

Han tells us his specialty is voice impersonation.  Changbin tells us he’s in charge of rap in the current boy project group.  Changbin’s style is dark and gloomy, which is a real contrast to the cartoon voices Han was just showing us.  I like finally getting to know the members of Stray Kids and get a feel for their group dynamic. 

As Bang Chan pep-talks the group during rehearsal, we pan around the room, and OH MY GOD is that Felix?

He’s been onscreen several times so far, and I did not recognize him at all. We’ll get to him in a minute.  First, 20 year-old Lee Minho introduces himself.  In Stray Kids, his name will be Lee Know.  He used to tour with BTS as a backup dancer.  Wow.

Lee Know now and on tour with BTS

Now we get to Felix.  He looks so young and small here, but he already has that deep voice.  (I love YouTube reaction videos to his voice.)  As I mentioned in the intro, he’s also from Australia, and at the time of this show, he’s still learning Korean.  We watch the other members teaching him the language through games and repetition. 

Now for Hyunjin, and the fact that we’re spending so much time with every group member has to be the show’s way of telegraphing that they’re going to win the showcase.  He’s also a dancer and visual stunner.  He seems a little self-conscious and embarrassed by the breathless response he gets from women just by smiling.

Now for our vocal team.  We meet 20 year-old Woojin.  He used to be with SM Entertainment and trained with the group that went on to become NCT.  He was brokenhearted when they debuted without him.  It’s a story we hear many, many times on these K-pop reality shows.

Next up is 17 year-old Jeongin.  His stage name will be I.N, simply because foreigners have trouble pronouncing his real name.  He’s from Busan, the sacred city to BTS fans.

Hyunjin, Woojin, and Jeongin (I.N)

Now we meet the soft-spoken Seungmin.  He may speak quietly, but he’s a powerhouse vocalist. 

Seungmin

Before I can check to see if we’ve met everyone, suddenly we’re back at the showcase, and the boys team is rehearsing.  Now it’s 2TEAM’s turn to look anxious.  But it’s not a done deal, especially when two of the boys drop their mics and have to scramble after them.  Oof.  Han also forgets some of the lyrics.  Backstage, Bang Chan gives them a reassuring pep talk and tells them to shake it off.  They still have the final performance to get it right.

With final rehearsals over, we get a montage of both teams getting ready for the showcase.  2TEAM had a flawless rehearsal and keeps sounding better with every practice, and Bang Chan looks like he needs an early jump on blood pressure medication.  And to add to the stress, there’s going to be an audience for this.  They’re lining up outside, and I can hear Bang Chan’s teeth grinding over the dramatic music. 

As the audience files in, Bang Chan is greeted backstage by the JYP girl group Twice, who are here to support him.  He tries to smile at them, but I worry he’s developing an ulcer. 

The girls in Twice tease him over how small he was when he first joined JYP, which I’m sure is what this poor guy really needs right now.  When they remember that he’s been a trainee for seven years, they gasp and exclaim that he’s been a trainee for WAY longer than some of them have.  Well!  Thanks for stopping by, ladies!  Need help getting to your seats and being told to put a sock in it?

They finally wish him well (“Hwaiting!”) and let him leave.  The showcase begins.  Our opening act is the junior boy team called BoyStory.  This is actually a Chinese group that went on to debut.  They’re still active.  We get more opening acts, including the dance line from 2TEAM and Bang Chan’s side project 3RACHA.  The crowd loves it.

Now for the main event.  2TEAM is up first.

These girls are amazing.  I need to check out ITZY.  Honestly, if I were watching this show back when it first aired, I’d be rooting for the girls to win this showcase.  The song is high energy with a pounding rock beat, and their cheerleader vocals remind me of the 70s rock band The Runaways.  Their performance is perfect, with no mistakes.  The bar has been set very high.

The crowd loves it.  It’s hard to tell what JYP thinks because the man has not smiled once.  He has spent the entire performance staring intently at the girls, which is really kind of creepy.  Let’s quickly move on to our boys team.

They gather backstage for one last pep talk from Bang Chan.  “Let’s make this our last showcase,” he says.  They make their way to the stage, where they had their clumsy rehearsal earlier.  They have to be perfect now if they want any chance of beating 2TEAM.  It’s showtime.

They pull it off perfectly.  It’s a fun song with some gymnastic dance moves, and I notice that Felix’s voice isn’t very deep in this performance.  The song is high energy but doesn’t yet have that dark vibe of danger we’ll see from them when they debut later.  But I easily see what they’re going to become. 

JYP actually smiles.  He raves about them in a confessional.  There’s no mistaking it.  The boys group was meant to be the winner here.

The audience leaves.  All the performers, including BoyStory and Lily M, gather onstage.  A member of 2TEAM whispers to her bandmates that she’s more nervous now than she was during the performance.  JYP arrives, and they all bow and greet him loudly.

We find out this was Bang Chan’s eighth showcase.  No wonder he’s so eager to make it his last.  JYP tells them he’s ready to choose the next group to debut.  Everyone freezes.  If it weren’t for the dramatic music, you could probably hear a pin drop on that stage.

In true K-pop survival show tradition, JYP drags it out.  He tells Bang Chan he did a great job but needs more charisma.  Changbin did the best rapping.  On 2TEAM, Chaeryeong and Yeji gave the strongest performances.  But the decision has been made.  The boys project team will debut.

The boys look stunned while the other trainees cheer for them.  They barely move.  They need time to process this, especially since some of them have been chasing this dream for years.  Now that it’s happening, they don’t know how to react.  If you were watching this with the volume off, you would think they’d lost.

JYP keeps stressing how great the nine members look together.  “The nine of you were like one body,” he says.  “I liked seeing the nine members.”  Okay.  I know at this point that Woojin will be leaving eventually, since he’s not in the current lineup, but I don’t know the details and don’t want to know yet.  Let’s see what happens. 

Bang Chan tells us in a confessional, “We will get to debut as nine.”  This show is really drilling that number into the ground.  Is this foreshadowing that Woojin will be eliminated on the show?

In the ten minutes we have left in this episode, we’re going to see the boys group get ready for their debut.  We get a look at their dorm, which is cramped.  My college dorm was the size of one of their bedrooms, and I only had to share it with one other person.  I’m guessing one reason trainees are so desperate to debut is so they can get rich enough to not have to stand in line for the bathroom or spend the night listening to their bandmates snore.

The boys are all given video cameras, because now they will be filming their lives 24/7.  We follow Changbin as he starts packing to live in the dorm.  He lives in what looks like a mansion.  The place is huge, with high ceilings and a chandelier.  What is this guy’s deal?

We switch to Woojin, who plays guitar for us.  He looks like a sweet kid.  I wonder what’s going to happen with him.  We also see Lee Know packing.  He packs his clothes in wrapped bundles instead of suitcases.  At first I thought this was a normal thing in Korea, but then the subtitles tell me it isn’t.  What is THIS guy’s deal?

Okay, time to end on a serious note.  JYP is waiting at a conference table.  He looks impatient.  His new debut group is keeping him waiting.  But when they do enter, he’s smiling, so I guess he won’t fire them today.

He tells them the company will be filming their debut process.  Rather than testing their dancing and singing, he’s going to be evaluating the team as a whole.  The company is in an unusual situation, since they’re not the ones who put this team together.  They will be taking a look at the results of Bang Chan’s work and seeing if they agree.

JYP assigns the group its first mission:  They must write and perform their own song.

My first thought is, are you kidding me?  Bang Chan and his 3RACHA crew have already been doing this.  But on second thought, this isn’t 3RACHA.  This is a nine-member group that needs its own image and sound.  Bang Chan and crew will be starting from scratch.  For once, we have an entertainment company with no idea of what their new debut group will sound like.

One more thing:  JYP tells them that if the company doesn’t like what it hears, some of these boys may be eliminated.

The weight of the world is on this boy’s shoulders.

See you next episode.

[catch-me-hello]

Next recapping project:  Stray Kids

Welcome back!  I am very excited about this next show.  It gives me a chance to shine a light on a little-known group that deserves some attention.  Have any of you heard of this small, indie K-pop group struggling to make a name for themselves – I think it’s Stray Cats or Slay Kids, something like that hang on there’s a commotion at my front door –

Okay, Stray Kids fans – IT WAS A JOKE.  It’s going to take me MONTHS to clean up this mess and get my door fixed. 

Yes, we are going to watch the 2017 survival reality show Stray Kids, brought to us by our old friends at Mnet and JYP Entertainment. 

I’m excited about this for a couple of reasons.  First of all, after the never-ending slog from hell that was the last two episodes of Debut’s Plan, these episodes are limited to one hour, with the finale being 90 minutes.  Thank the K-pop gods.

Secondly, watching this show gives me a chance to learn more about the group.  I’ve had Stray Kids songs on my playlists since I first got into K-pop in 2023, but I didn’t know anything about them.  Later, as I started doing some basic research, Bang Chan and Felix were the ones who stood out.  These two members are from Australia and do the majority of the English language interviews.  They’re also responsible for one of my favorite clips in which Felix shows off an egg he has in his pocket for some reason, and Bang Chan accidentally drops it.  Trust me, it’s funny.

I know basically nothing about the other group members or how they came together and debuted in the first place.  That changes today.  Join me as I learn the origin story of this self-producing group who has won a tour bus full of awards and spent 2024 performing at Lollapalooza and becoming the first K-pop group to attend the Met Gala.  Attention must be paid.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to clean up my apartment and fix the front door.  I’m never getting this glitter out of the rug.  For a fan group called STAY you’d think they would have STAYED to clean up this mess but grumble grouch gripe….

[catch-me-hello]

Debut’s Plan, Episode 10 (FINALE):  I did. Now what?

We’re finally at the end.  But before we get started, two amazing new music videos dropped this past week, and I am obsessed.  The first is from old favorite RIIZE, called “Bag Bad Back.”  It’s an aggressive beat with a bit of a metal vibe, and it’s incredibly addictive.  The other is a romantic dance/pop song from Jang Haneum called “Shine.”  The high notes are heaven.  It reminds me of 80s synth pop.  I love it so much.

RIIZE and Jang Haneum

Okay, now back to Debut’s Plan.  Finale Time.  It’s been a rough week on Reddit since the semi-final.  Not only are fans gutted over losing both Kaira and Haru, but remember the anti-fans and other online trolls we’ve talked about in previous recaps?  Six-year trainee and finalist Kim Ji Yong is their new target.  Apparently, they’re upset at all the airtime he’s been getting, and they feel like he’s being pushed at them.

To which I say, grow up, you morons.  If you want to take it up with Starship, fine.  Don’t take it out on a genuinely nice and talented trainee whose only crime is chasing his dream.  Some of these online bullies are accusing him of taking a spot that one of the eliminated trainees should have, which again, is out of his control.  Please turn off your computers and get a hobby.

Okay!  Now for the Debut’s Plan finale.  We’re going to be dealing with some of the same problems from the semi-final, including a lack of translation in the non-scripted conversations and an episode that will last several long, excruciating hours.  I’ve also been reading online that the actual name for this new group will make me wish they had stuck to NewKids. 

We start the show with twelve finalists, five of whom will be eliminated.  We get flashbacks from the beginning of the series until now, which I mostly skip through.  This will be a four-hour episode.  I’m fast-forwarding through the filler.

Finally, we return to the live show arena and our host, Joohoney, who looks as exhausted with this show as I am.

I seriously didn’t recognize him at first. 

I am excited to see Shownu is back, and is that his Monsta X bandmate Kihyun sitting next to him?  We only get a quick shot, but I’m pretty sure that’s him.

Our NewKids perform “Imperfect.”  Our eliminated trainees are also in the audience, looking supportive but also tired.  Why do all the judges and coaches look like disaster survivors waiting for the Red Cross to arrive?  This show has really seemed to take a toll on everyone.

The judges talk about how all the trainees have improved.  And yes, that is Kihyun sitting next to Shownu.  Just think, Hyungwon will be discharged from the military in a little over a week, and we’ll finally get our Monsta X comeback!  I may even make cupcakes to celebrate.  Any excuse for frosting.

Suddenly, Joohoney tells us we’re about to learn the name of the final group!  I’m surprised – I don’t think we’ve gotten the group name this early on any of the finales I’ve recapped.  I am genuinely excited.  K-pop fans, the new group’s name will be:

i did.

As in “I did it.” 

Okay, just …

What?

Someone on Reddit said they thought at first that the word was “idiot,” which would have been right in line with the vibe of this show. 

Forgive me while I nerd out for a moment.

Honestly, “idiot” was my second thought.  My first thought was that it was “ID-ID,” as in part of the psyche, along with the ego and superego, and I was bewildered as to why they not only chose that word but used it twice.  The id is the part of our subconscious that seeks immediate gratification and operates without regard for logic or social norms.  Basically, it’s the spoiled brat of our subconscious and the total opposite of acceptable behavior in Korea.  So I thought this show was calling their new idols “spoiled brats” because no one at Starship had taken a basic psychology course.

And the more I thought about it, the more I realized how perfect this is.  The name “idid,” however you read it, is the perfect cherry bomb on the garbage fire that has been this show.

I’m sorry.  I have tried.  I really tried to stay as positive as I could during these recaps, but I guess the frustration has been building up, because it took a silly little band name to break me. 

I cannot believe that Starship Entertainment, the company that gave us the tight ship of a show called No Mercy, a show that brought us one of the best K-pop groups in the world, is the same company that gave us this bloated mess of a show with not one but TWO four-hour live finales (no wonder everyone looks exhausted) and gave us a group that doesn’t really seem to stand out from the groups that other entertainment companies are pumping out these days.  (Trust me, you’ll see when we get to the end.)

Monsta X stands out in the industry.  They may have similarities with other groups, but there is no mistaking them for any other group.  They are true idols.  Icons.  And when you watch No Mercy, you see how we ended up with a group like Monsta X.  I went back and looked at the episode run times.  Each episode of No Mercy is an hour long, and the finale is a little bit longer and probably ran for 90 minutes with commercials.  Not only was it well edited, but it left us wanting more.  At the end of the series, I wanted more of these guys.  I wanted to see how they would click as a group and what kind of music they would make. 

Now look at Debut’s Plan.  A couple of episodes ran for close to two hours, and most ran longer than that.  Plus we had the baseball K-drama and the two finale episodes that not only ran for staggeringly long runtimes but weren’t completely subtitled, which made for a frustrating viewing experience if you didn’t speak or read Korean.  (As of this writing, the semi-final episode has finally gotten all the English subtitles, a week after it first aired.)  And I didn’t even watch the metric ton of other videos uploaded to the YouTube channel with side projects and songs and interviews and God knows what else. 

And again, YOUTUBE.  This show aired on YouTube.  Seriously, Starship?  No Mercy aired on Mnet, a hugely popular network in Korea, one that music industry professionals call important and influential.  Did that network take one look at this show and say no thanks?  Because I don’t blame them if that’s what happened.

So what I’m trying to explain is this:  by the time we got to the Debut’s Plan finale, I was tired of the NewKids.  And I want to stress that it’s not their fault.  Starship forced them to overstay their welcome.  I guess that’s why that band name was my breaking point.

I’m just done.  I scanned through the whole middle section of this finale, and it’s the usual stuff we see on every other survival show these days.  The finalists choose their songs, go through drama while they choose their teams and positions, rehearse, get yelled at in the midpoint evaluations, and do the final performance at the finale.  So let’s just move ahead and find out the winners.

And believe me, there’s one more thing that’s going to frustrate the hell out of me after the seven winners are announced.  Please bear with me.

The winners are:

Kim Min Jae and Jang Yong Hoon.  Our two besties get to debut together.  Despite my frustration with this show, I am genuinely happy for them. 

Kim Min Jae and Jang Yong Hoon

Baek Jun Hyuk.  He’s been the slow improver on this show and now will finally debut.

Park Won Bin.  Our second-longest Starship trainee and one of my top picks since Day One.  I’m happy to see him so happy.  He deserves this.

Baek Jun Hyuk and Park Won Bin

Chu Yoo Chan.  Our former Starship trainee who left and return for this show through an open audition.  He has had his struggles on the show but finally made it.

Chu Yoo Chan

I’m getting worried about Kim Ji Yong, our Starship Legendary Trainee, who is still standing with the other finalists.  The next winner will be the “Fan Save” candidate, and as we know, the fans have not been nice to him.

The Fan Save is Jeong Se Min, our sixteen year-old Yellow Team Beginner Member.

Jeong Se Min

The last winner is the Board Member Save.  If this is how Kim Ji Yong wins, I’m going to hate it for him.  He deserves so much better than this after proving himself for so many years with this company.  But at least he’ll win.

He doesn’t win.

The Board saves Park Jun Hwan.  I’m happy for him, but he’s not nearly as talented as Kim Ji Yong.  The Board chose visuals over talent.  He looks as stunned as I feel.  Well, at least his parents can be happy they made him choose this over baseball.

Okay, so we have our seven members.  But then K.Will makes an announcement, and everyone loses their minds.  None of is it translated.  I have no idea what’s going on.

Eventually I figured out that K.Will has decided to add an eighth group member.  They are saving one more person.  And two thoughts go through my mind.

One, this is exactly what K.Will did on No Mercy when he added I.M in the middle of the series.  It was a shocker of an idea that wound up creating one of the best rap duos in K-pop.  So I guess he’s doing a callback and hoping lightning strikes twice.

Two, this is how Kim Ji Yong is going to get into the group.  K.Will recognizes that this talented trainee is going to walk away from the industry if they don’t grab him now.  He’s decided to tell the online bullies to go pound sand, and he’s going to give this hardworking and talented trainee the debut he deserves.  It’s brilliant.  I love it.

But no.

K.Will saves Park Seong Hyeon.

Oh, Ji Yong.  I am so sorry.

I don’t know what else to say.  Ji Yong, I am so very sorry.  You didn’t deserve this.  If you do walk away from the industry, I hope you have a fulfilling and happy life as far away from Starship as humanly possible.

That’s it for Debut’s Plan.  I won’t be doing a post-recap wrap-up because I’m just done with this. 

It’s not just this show.  If you’ve seen the promo for the upcoming Boys Planet 2,  you know it’s going to be twice as big and bloated, and I know I’m going to watch, but I don’t think I’ll recap it.  I’ll watch for familiar faces and post updates and observations, but I can’t make myself sit through it and take notes and watch the K-pop machine pump out another yet boy band that looks like all the others.

In fact, I’m going in a totally different direction. I’m making a U-Turn.

I’m going to go back and recap an older show.  Something along the lines of No Mercy.  A series with hour-long episodes and a 90-minute finale. 

Something that brought us another legendary K-pop group, a group that could never be mistaken for anyone else.

I’ll start working on that.  Until then, I wish the best for idid and hope they have a great career.  Go chase your dream, kids.  In the meantime, I’ll be here at Catch Me Hello headquarters (my apartment), just kicking the leaves in the autumn breeze and not forgetting about the sound they make.

See you soon.

[catch-me-hello]

Next recap project...

The Debut’s Plan finale is this Sunday.  After posting that recap, my next project will be the 2017 show that brought us Stray Kids.  I can’t wait to get started!

[catch-me-hello]

Debut’s Plan, Episode 9:  Semi-Finals!  (Settle in, Folks.)

It’s going to be a stressful episode, K-pop fans.  Welcome to the Debut’s Plan semi-final, where some trainees are definitely getting cut but one MIGHT be saved.  I’m just going to drop my debit card in the swear jar for today.  Let’s do this.

The semi-final aired live, and we are missing a LOT of subtitles during the live part.  However, we do get a cool new stage and one thousand fans.

Our trainees perform songs from the show, and it’s high-energy and fun.  After the performances, the episode officially kicks off with our emcee.  And – HEY, it’s Jooheon!  Jooheon is back!  God, I can’t wait for the Monsta X comeback!

Jooheon proves right away to be the best emcee on all these live shows I’ve seen so far, and it’s not because I’m biased as a monbebe.  He has the same uncertain pauses we’ve seen from all other hosts as he reads from the cards, but his natural charm and energy keeps this from looking like a hostage video.  When things start to lag, he flashes that thousand-watt smile and waves his arms to encourage cheers.  He was born to be onstage.

Like I said, a lot of the live segments aren’t translated.  The script that Jooheon reads is translated, but all the unscripted talk isn’t.  But I’ve seen enough of these live shows to know that when someone on the judging panel is speaking, they’re talking about how much the trainees have improved.  I’m pretty sure Korean law dictates that’s all they’re allowed to talk about.  If a judge accidentally lights his sleeve on fire, he can only scream about how much the trainees have improved while banging his arm on the table and grabbing frantically for his water glass.  Trust me.  We’re not missing anything.

Jooheon reminds us about the Super Pass.  If the judges want to, they can save one eliminated trainee tonight.  So now they pretty much have to.  It would make for really bad television if the judges just said, “You’re right, none of them are worth saving.  Bye!”  That audience would swarm the table and beat them to death with their signs.

We learn that seven of the finalists tonight will be chosen by the fans, and seven by the panel.  So that’s fourteen, plus one more if the Super Pass is used.  That’s fourteen finalists in theory.  Put a pin in this. 

The screens in the arena cut to footage of the midterm evaluations the trainees had in preparation for tonight.  We have some new celebrity judges!  From the girl group IVE, we have Liz and Gaeul (we met Liz earlier on this show).  And from the boy group Cravity, we have Serim and Taeyoung.  (I’m excited.  I love Cravity.)  Finally, from girl group WJSN, we have Yeonjung and Dayoung.

Our Cravity guys recognize six-year Starship trainee Kim Ji Yong right away and wave to him.  I’m glad he’s got that extra bit of support in the audience.  He really needs to debut now.  I don’t want to see him give up.

Team Step Up is performing first.  My picks Park Won Bin, Wu Hao, and Kaira are on this team.  We get a flashback in which the parts are distributed.  This is a very, very long episode, so I won’t go into details on the flashbacks unless something important happens.  That includes the standard Flashback Formula – we all know the drill by now.

The team performs the song, and right away, Kaira stumbles on the lyrics.  Oof.  Then Lee Tae Geon also forgets a line.  This sets off a chain reaction until everyone is flubbing the lyrics.  Then their dance formation falls apart.  I’m sure this is the Flashback Formula again, but it’s painful to watch.  It must be a bummer for our live audience to be watching this as well.

Speaking of the live audience, it’s time for the final live performance for Team Step Up.  Let’s go, guys!

Of course, they nail it.  Jooheon calls them to the front of the stage for the panel’s feedback.  Nothing the panel says is translated, which is really frustrating, but I know everyone is saying they’ve improved.  Moving on.

Next up is Team Sticky Bomb.  “Just from the title alone,” Jooheon tells us, “you can feel the explosive energy!”  I can also imagine the porno this would be the title for.  Definitely something in the BL genre.

We get another flashback to the midpoint eval.  This team includes my picks Jo Min Jae and Haru.  They wow the judges with their rehearsal.  They get some minor criticism and tell Haru he needs to stand out more.  We then get some interesting footage in a recording studio as Haru struggles with his self-confidence and eventually overcomes it.  End of flashback.  Time to perform this vaguely obscene-sounding song in front of a thousand kids!

They’re so good.  The panel talks about how much they’ve improved.  None of it is translated, but I know the drill.  The lack of subtitles is frustrating when Jooheon jokes with the trainees and the judges talk about specific trainees who are ranking high with them.  I wonder if we’ll get English subtitles later for these segments.

Next up, Team Password, with my picks Jang Kyu Hyun, Kim Ji Yong, and Lee Jun Seo.  We get a flashback to them choosing Jang Yong Hoon as their ID Member.  Their midpoint eval goes great.  They do their session in the recording studio.  Now for the live stage.

We get some more untranslated commentary.  I’m assuming they’ve all improved.  The three performances are now done, and we still have two hours to go.  I do love watching these survival reality shows, but the live finales can be a bloated mess.

The panel huddles to decide who will survive to go to the finals.  While they do, we get a montage of special moments from the show and messages from the New Kids.  Turns out there was a mailbox on the campus.  The New Kids tells us about a legend that if you write a letter to a friend you most want to debut with and drop it in the mailbox, your wish will come true.  Next week, the Starship Entertainment building will be buried under a mountain of letters from every hopeful trainee in South Korea.

This segment goes on for a loooooooong time.  It really is sweet, but there’s only so much of this syrupy stuff I can take.  I actually turned the sound off for several minutes and listened to my Kendrick Lamar playlist, just to get back to my regular cynical self.  It made for an interesting viewing experience.

FINALLY this segment ends, and we are back at the live show.  Our trainees are standing in formation around the stage, and I guess the judges still need time to decide because we get another song.  It’s a lovely song.  I’m just getting impatient.  If this is just the semi-final, I can’t imagine how long the finale will be.  The stress is taking its toll on the trainees.  Those who make it to the finale will have to go through this all over again.

Jooheon takes the stage and says, “Before we announce the results of the Pre-Debut Evaluation, aren’t you curious which songs will be featured and how the teams will be – “ NO.  Sorry to interrupt, Jooheon, but the answer is no.  Just TELL US WHO WON.  My legs are asleep.  I can’t remember what day it is, and I’m pretty sure it’s my birthday.  Just tell us who won SO I CAN HAVE MY LIFE BACK.

We get another flashback segment where the trainees learn what the finale songs will be, and this segment goes on forver, so I skip through it.  We return to the live show.  Jooheon tells the audience to vote for their favorite NewKids (I still really dislike that name) and promises that the finalists will be announced shortly.

Now K.Will talks about where they are in the voting process, and it’s not translated, so I don’t know what’s going on.  But now we’re getting yet another video segment where the NewKids have prepared video letters to their future selves.  My contact lenses actually dried out at this point, and I had to switch to my glasses. I lean on the fast-forward button again.    

Now, finally, praise the K-pop gods, we are going to find out the finalists.  This entire process drags on, so I’ll just give you the names.  We’re starting with the seven chosen by the judges.

Jang Yong Hoon.  Getting picked as the ID Member for Team Password was a smart move for our nineteen year-old trainee.

Jang Kyu Hyun.  One of my pics!  He’s one of the few trainees from the Yellow Team Beginner Group to make it past the first episode.

Kim Min Jae.  Also nineteen and close friends with fellow finalist Jang Yong Hoon.  They’re moving up together.

Jang Yoon Hoon, Jang Kyu Hyun, and Kim Min Jae

Chu Yoo Chan.  Wow.  One of the open audition contestants.  He had previously left Starship and then returned for this show.  He might debut, thanks to that decision.

Just to give you an idea of how much they’re dragging this out, we still have an hour to go.

Lee Tae Geon.  Another open audition contestant.

Park Jun Hwan.  When this seventeen year-old joined the show, he’d only been training for five months, after his parents refused to let him be a baseball player.

Kim Ji Yong.  Our six-year Starship Legend trainee.  I’ve been rooting for this guy since Day One.  He is overwhelmed and struggles to say his thanks through tears.

Chu Yoo Chan, Lee Tae Geon, Park Jun Hwan, and Kim Ji Yong

Now for the seven voted in by the fans.  I can’t believe the judges didn’t pick Park Won Bin.  Hopefully the fans saved him.  And Haru.  And Kaira.

Jeong Se Min.  Sixteen years old.  Another Yellow Team Beginner Group member.

Jang Yong Hoon, again.  Okay, so we found out earlier than some fan choices may overlap with judge choices.  Here’s our first one.  And yes, they make him do another thank-you speech.  This episode may never end.

Kim Min Jae, again.  Another overlap.  He and his bestie now both share this honor.

Jang Kyu Hyun, again.  Are they all going to overlap?  How will this affect the final number of finalists?  I am so confused.  And tired.  Very, very tired.

Park Won Bin.  Finally.  I can’t believe it took this long to call his name.  He’s the second longest training member at Starship, and now he may finally debut.

Baek Jun Hyuk.  He just looks exhausted at this point.  He had a poor showing at the beginning of this series and kept improving.  Now he needs to sleep for a couple of days.

Wu Hao.  His passionate performances made him one of my picks early on.

Jeong Se Min, Park Won Bin, Baek Jun Hyuk, and Wu Hao

So that’s it.  Because three trainees overlapped, only eleven will go to the finale, unless the judges use the Super Pass to save someone.

Of course they use it.  The judges save Park Seong Hyeon.  He missed two episodes due to illness and has been working so hard to make up for it.  He barely claws his way to the finale, thanks to the mercy of the judges.

I’m stunned at some of these eliminations.  Like Jo Min Jae.  Our Six Singers Family Trainee has lost again.  He deserves so much better than this.

And both Kaira and Haru.  I can’t believe neither made it in.  That makes zero sense.

Not to mention Lee Jun Seo.  He’s the first trainee we met on the show.  Our Timothée Chalamet of Starship. He’d only been a trainee for a year when he started this show, but I loved his voice and hoped he’d at least make it to the finale.

I’m not so surprised about fourteen year-old show maknae Lee Woo Ju.  Our baby-faced trainee did really well, but he’s just not ready yet. 

Lee Jun Seo and Jo Min Jae

Kaira and Haru

I’m heartbroken for my eliminated favorites.  I’ve been avoiding social media all day while I took notes on this episode.  I feel like when I open Reddit tomorrow morning, I’ll be slammed against the wall by an avalanche of viewer protests.

I’m off to bed.  Don’t forget to keep voting – you can now vote for seven NewKids at newkids.co.kr.  And for those who wish to vent, there’s Reddit, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter (I refuse to call it anything else), Bluesky, maybe Wattpad if you run out of options.  I’m still on LiveJournal if you want to vent in my comments section.

I’ll read the viewer comments at some point, but not tonight.  Enough.  Good night.

[catch-me-hello]

Debut’s Plan, Episode 8 – Monsta Energy

This show is going to kill me.

Full disclosure:  I’m not a full-time writer.  I have a job, and writing K-pop essays and recaps is my hobby.  It’s been great having these Debut’s Plan episodes drop on Fridays so that when I finish work, I can spend the weekend writing.  But the next episode dropped as I was logging into my work computer Monday morning.  I guess I won’t be sleeping much this week.

Let’s start with a quick bit of housekeeping.  At the end of my I-Land (Enhypen) recaps, I was very concerned about eliminated contestant and 14 year-old show maknae Daniel.  He seemed to have emotionally crashed afterwards.  He’s one of those vanished trainees that I’ve been trying to keep up with, along with Lee Jae Eok from Wild Idol. 

Over the weekend, I was searching online for news about Boys Planet 2, and I found rumors that Daniel would be one of the contestants.

I quickly jumped to the comments, where I found a lot of skepticism, because apparently he’s working on a solo album.  From there, I found a music video he released three weeks ago.  He goes by Kyu now, the song is called “Tempo,” and it’s a smooth, steamy bossa nova groove. 

Watching the video feels like watching the solo work from Monsta X’s I.M.  The song is beautiful, and I really hope Daniel’s doing okay.

And since I also recapped Wild Idol, I’ll add that former TAN members Jaejun and Hyunyeop have teamed up with another accomplished K-pop artist named Juntae and debuted as the group In A Minute.  I really like their song “What You Want,” but I will never stop hoping for a TAN reunion someday.

Okay!  Now that the housekeeping’s done, let’s have fun.  Welcome back, however unexpectedly, to Debut’s Plan!

We start with a time jump.  After the success of the one-take video last week, our trainees went into a three-month special incubating program, where they have done nothing but practice nonstop.  After this period of intense training, our boys gather in a new location.  I miss the campus already.  We still have 21 trainees, so Seok June hasn’t left us yet.

Our Starnouncer appears on the wall.  We’re getting two more Plans.  Plan 6 is a pre-debut assessment, and Plan 7 is the debut assessment.  Plan 6 will be live in front of a crowd of 1,000 fans, which may be the biggest audience we’ve had on one of these shows, with the exception of the Boys Planet finale.  Our trainees are excited and terrified.  They get even more terrified when the Starnouncer confirms there will be eliminations.

Kim Ji Yong, our 6-year trainee, stares at the ground.  He has been eliminated several times over the past six years, often right before a planned debut.  We already know this is the last time he’s going to try to debut.  He told us back in the beginning that if he doesn’t make it this time, he’s giving up.

Now the Starnouncer deals a wild card.  An eliminated trainee from Plan 6 might be given a pass to come back for Plan 7.  Might.  The board will decide whether to use the “Super Pass” after the elimination.  It’s a slim chance, but it does give a bit of hope to the trainees.

Now to reveal the songs for Plan 6.  They are “Step Up,” “Sticky Bomb,” and “Password.”  These appear to be three new songs written for this show.  Now to divide these NewKids into the three groups.

This process gets a bit complicated, as it’s all about the positions in each group and how our trainees fit into these positions.  K-pop fans will recognize several of them:  Main Vocals, Main Dancer, Rapper, Sub-Vocals, and All-Rounder.  The whole process of telling each trainee what their position is and putting them into the groups takes a while, and of course, the text the Starnouncer gives us isn’t translated.  Kim Ji Yong is listed as an All-Rounder, which should hopefully help his chances of staying.

As expected, Kaira is listed in the dance line, as well as Haru.  Seok June is put in the rap line.  He has held on for a long time on this show, including the three-month incubation program.  There are only three episodes left after this.  He really did pick a puzzling time to leave.

Six Singers Family trainee Jo Min Jae is put in the Main Vocalist category.  It’s not looking like he will make it to the final group on this show, which will be his second loss after Make Mate 1, but I’m keeping my fingers crossed.  He deserves so much more than he’s been getting in his trainee career. 

Jo Min Jae and Kaira

We go through a long process of assigning each trainee to a song.  Kaira and Haru wind up in a dance battle for the position they both want, and Haru wins.  I was really hoping Kaira would come out on top for this.  I’ve been pulling for him the entire series, but it might just not be his turn yet.  He takes the loss well in front of the other trainees but breaks down when he steps out of the room.  I don’t think the tears are because he lost specifically to Haru.  I think he also sees the writing on the wall.  God, I hope he doesn’t give up.  He’s going to be another trainee I keep my eye on after this show.

Okay!  Teams are chosen.  Now we get an announcement that a special rap trainer is arriving.  He walks through the door and OH MY GOD.

It’s Jooheon from Monsta X!  One of my favorite artists on Earth! (I know he goes by Joohoney, but the show is calling him Jooheon.)  I am so excited, and so are the trainees.  We needed a rap coach, and the show brought the king.  I honestly think some of the trainees might faint.

Jooheon doesn’t take his seat until he shakes hands with our starstruck NewKids.  He’s just the best.

The first group up for evaluation is Team Step Up.  We get a flashback to their rehearsals, and Kaira finally gets a win when he earns the ID Member spot (Center Visual) after two rounds of auditions.  His face lights up for the first time since this plan was announced.  It’s his first time being an ID Member.  His confidence has definitely grown, as he takes a leadership role for the rest of rehearsals.  He has matured a lot on this series.

The flashback now moves over to the rehearsals for Team Sticky Bomb, and it looks like we might not see any actual performances in this episode.  Park Seong Hyeon is gunning for the ID Member part, still trying to make up for lost time after being out sick for a couple of episodes.  He’s up against every single member of his team, including Haru, but he wins out in the end.

Flashback over.  Team Sticky Bomb is about to do their evaluation.  (Is is just me, or does that song title sound like English slang for something obscene?)  This will be Jin Bo Min’s first time rapping, and he asks Jooheon for advice.  Jooheon tells him to focus on the message of the lyrics. He has Jin Bo Min deliver the line, “Don’t be scared, push it to the limit, don’t stop UHHH!”

Jin Bo Min performs the line in a rather subdued voice.  The “UHHH” at the end sounds like mild annoyance instead of the verbal aggression it’s supposed to be.

“You need to push it to the limit!” Jooheon tells him.  He stands up and encourages the trainee to try again.  It seems to work.

Jooheon is such a good coach.

We see him working with the other trainees, giving advice like, “If you’re a blade, be a very thick blade.  Think like that and start rapping.”  We see clips of the trainees before and after getting his advice, and he’s lighting a fire under them.  They throw their bodies into it.

“Don’t try to find a tone, just be yourself,” he tells Baek Jun Hyuk, another first time rapper.  “Rap is me!  Singing is also me!”  This is making me wish I could rap.

Later, Jooheon tells the group, “I want to be a monster onstage.  That’s why I scrunch down.  Find your own personal character.  You need to have your own color!”  This monsta is changing lives right now.

Team Sticky Bomb is now ready to do their evaluation.  I was hoping for something amazing after all this advice from Jooheon, but it’s not good.  They are all over the place.  Their formation falls apart immediately, and I can’t tell what they’re supposed to be doing.  When they finish, the room is dead silent.

When the coaches finally speak, it’s a laundry list of problems.  Baek Jun Hyuk lost his part and staggered around like he just woke up.  No one was on the beat.  It looked like they were imitating dancers instead of actually dancing.  These harsh criticisms would be hard to hear at any point in the series, but now, with eliminations coming up, they’re a stern warning.  Time for improvement is running out.

Team Sticky Bomb (seriously with that name) goes back to their rehearsal room, looking glum.  But then Baek Jun Hyuk says, “I’ve noticed that the team that isn’t very good at first has the best results at the end.  Let’s keep the cliché going.”

Guys, ONE OF OUR TRAINEES JUST FIGURED OUT THE FLASHBACK FORMULA!  He’s on to the producers!  I can just imagine the show’s editing team seeing this footage and having a panic attack.

Sherlock Jun Hyuk

We quickly cut over to the rehearsals for Team Password.  Fourteen year-old Lee Woo Ju is losing his confidence, and instead of auditioning for a part, he’s willing to take any part that’s left over.  He’s not sure he can stand out.  “I feel so small.  I’m just being dumb,” he says.  My heart aches for him.  In the end, he gets the Sub-Vocal 4 part.

Now we jump ahead to their evaluation.  They look and sound good.  The coaches applaud.

The coaches’ only concern is that they couldn’t see or hear Lee Woo Ju very well.  They encourage him to make himself known in the performance.  It makes me happy to see this.  All the celebrities on the panel are rooting for this insecure show maknae and want him to succeed.

Jooheon also gives him a pep talk, encouraging him to debut, and if that doesn’t lift this maknae’s spirits, I don’t know what will. 

With the evaluations over, Jooheon gives them some final words.

“Once you debut, that’s the real start,” he tells all 21 trainees.  “You’ll debut as Starship’s boy group.  Monsta X definitely wants our little brothers to do well.  And when the time comes, I’ll be meaner as your big brother and a sunbae.  The most important thing is the fans that love you guys.  Show your stage with gratitude for all your fans that come a long way to see you.”

We need more Jooheons in the world.

The episode ends here with a montage of all three teams in final rehearsals.  These last three episodes should be VERY exciting, with three final performances, one thousand fans, and eliminations.

The next episode should drop this Friday, or perhaps in the next ten minutes.  I can’t predict this show schedule anymore.  In the meantime, don’t forget to vote for your favorite NewKid at newkids.co.kr.  We’re getting closer to learning who will become little brothers to Monsta X.  And it looks like in the next episode, we’ll be getting a visit from some members of Cravity!  See you then!

[catch-me-hello]

Debut’s Plan, Episode 7:  Bittersweet

Well.  It has certainly been a week.

It started kinda cute, with the first episode of the trainees’ K-drama Imperfect Game dropping to mixed feedback on Reddit.  I actually liked it for what it was, a side project for our trainees to show off their Expression skills.  Our Top 7 did a really good job, including in the smaller roles, like Haru and Seok June, and wait a minute, we just got some news from the show:

This news dropped on Thursday, and fans of the show are surprised because he’s been one everyone assumed would make it to the end.  I’m going through my notes from the show.  He practiced so hard, he gave himself nosebleeds.  He ranked high in the online voting.  We’re coming down to the final episodes, and this sad news is a bit of a stumbling block on this mixed bag of a series. 

I am glad I chose to recap Debut’s Plan.  I definitely have my criticisms of the show and the way they’re putting this group together.  But there’s still a lot to like about this, including last week’s Expression challenge with real acting classes and a real K-drama.  Because they’ve kept the group of trainees relatively small compared to other survival shows, it’s been easier to get to know them instead of seeing them as a throng of hopefuls being churned out by a K-pop factory like on other shows (cough boys planet cough).

I like the campus setting and our celebrity guest coaches.  It’s been fun getting to participate in the voting.  I especially like that this show is giving us a real look at how the foreign trainees survive this already stressful program while struggling to learn the language.  I feel invested in these trainees and want them to come out of this okay.  Which is why the news of Seok June was jarring.  I really hope that whatever he does next, he comes out okay.

So now we’re moving on to Plan 5.  Let’s do this.

The trainees are relieved this will be their final plan.  Our Starnouncer appears on the main dome.  “In order to receive fans’ love for a long time as an idol group,” it tells them, “there is one thing that is required.”

Ah.  So Plan 5 is about never having a girlfriend, or avoiding friendships with other idols your fans hate, or never making a single mistake in public ever.  Now I see why Seok June left.

No, this is about Teamwork.  A new assessment song is revealed:  “Balla.”  It’s a rap song.  The trainees love it.  According to Google, the word means “want” or “desire.”  For the assessment, all 21 trainees will become one team and create a performance video for the song, using various locations all over the campus.  They are very excited.

Then the Starnouncer drops a bomb.  The video will have to be filmed with the continuous one-take method.  No cuts or re-dos.  If someone screws up, it stays in.  If they fail, the results will be revealed to the world as an incomplete video. 

The Starnouncer is replaced with a giant timer set for 168 hours.  Seven days.  It starts counting down.  It’s Go Time for this mission.  First step is to choose a team leader for this crushing amount of responsibility.  Previous team leaders from other missions, including Seok June, are automatically nominated.  Others volunteer, and they all give campaign speeches.  Everyone votes.  The winner is 6-year legend trainee Kim Ji Yong.

No time to celebrate – the 7-day timer has been ticking all this time.  Our new leader gets to work.  He chooses two co-leaders, Park Seong Hyeon and Baek Jun Hyuk.  Park Seong Hyeon is the one who was out sick for a couple of episodes, so this is a good opportunity for him.  They pull in other co-leaders and start meeting to discuss concepts and formation.  This goes on for a while.

After a whole day of this, they are finally ready to start rehearsals.  It doesn’t go well.  The other trainees are confused about the instructions and have their own ideas.  Everyone looks tired and irritated. 

“I’m the part director and the co-leader,” says Baek Jun Hyuk in a confessional, and right away I see the problem.  We’re now up to five or six assistant leaders, all with their own ideas, which is why the other trainees are confused.  The co-leaders start arguing with each other in front of everyone.  We’ve already lost one day and made no progress.  I’m guessing here, since I can only go by the subtitles, but it looks like Kim Ji Yong is afraid to just make decisions and lead.  He’s spreading the responsibility out among too many people.

Finally, everyone meets in the main dome to start over.  Seok June raises his hand and says that while the leaders are bickering, the other trainees have nothing to do but watch the clock tick down.  “It’s honestly frustrating,” he says.

The leaders agree.  Kim Ji Yong apologizes to everyone.  He’s determined to do better.  But in the meantime, they’ve lost another day.

The next morning, the trainees are jolted awake by the “Balla” song being played on the campus loudspeakers at top volume. 

I’ll be honest.  This would make me quit right then.  My alarm clock is set to gradually increase in volume.  Do not blast music at me unless you want to find my crystal globe night light rammed right up your ass.

The Starnouncer’s voice blares out of the speakers with a special announcement.  All the trainees are being sent to a Teamwork Camp. 

“We’re going camping!” Lee Tae Geon shouts joyfully.  I have a very bad feeling about this, and readers of my 2pm/2am Hot Blood recaps will know why.  The trainees on that show were told they were going fishing and wound up doing military training in the snow while soldiers yelled at them for several days.  I don’t think this group can survive that.  For Pete’s sake, Lee Woo Ju is only fourteen years old.

Everyone scrambles to get dressed and pack their bags.  They stumble outside to get on a bus.  The sun isn’t even up yet.  This is exactly what happened to 2pm and 2am.  I’m dreading this.

“We’ll be back!” Jang Yong Hoon tells the camera before getting on the bus.  I sure hope so.  Wait, is this what happens to Seok June?  Is he still wandering around a campsite somewhere?  Let’s keep an eye on him. 

Haru can help with that.  He’s Seok June’s seatmate.  Haru has never gone camping in Korea before, so Seok June explains about campfires and grilling barbecue on a big flame, and I’m guessing this never happens in Japan because Haru has no idea what he’s talking about.  Than again, Haru is a trainee, and they don’t really get out much.  I have no idea if I’m getting a cultural lesson or if I should be learning from people who have more of a social life.

After a long bus ride, the trainees arrive at Teamwork Camp.  They’re told that in order to improve their teamwork, special trainers are waiting for them at the site.  Oh God.  It’s going to be soldiers, isn’t it?  I’m genuinely worried right now. 

Our trainees race down to the shoreline, excited about seeing the ocean.  They screech to a dead stop at a mudflat.  Not the ocean.  A mudflat.  Anyone remember Wild Idol?  These kids are doomed.

“What if we have to do a military camp?” asks Chu Yoo Chan, who clearly reads my recaps.  Some quick background on this trainee:  He was with Starship and left but then came back when he joined this show through open auditions.  Legally, he still may be able to flee.

Suddenly, the trainees turn around to find A SOLDIER IS WAITING FOR THEM.  I WAS RIGHT.

The soldier is Ma Seon Ho.  He introduces himself as a trainer, but his uniform has the Korean flag sewn onto it, so I’m not buying it.  Right away, he makes them run sprints on the mudflats.  Several of them fall.  All of them finally make it back to the “trainer,” some of them literally spitting out mud.

They seem okay, laughing as they catch their breath.  Ma Seon Ho is not amused and orders them to stop laughing.  He tells them to do the run again and be back in 30 seconds, and if they see any fellow trainees struggling, they have to help each other.  Well, that’s nicer than the soldiers in Hot Blood, who literally made those trainees beat each other up in a boxing ring.  Maybe Ma Seon Ho is saving that part for later.

The boys make it back okay, although I’m pretty sure Kaira was wearing glasses when he started the run.  Next, they do jumping jacks, and then squats.  Ma Soon Ho makes them do the squats over when someone counts wrong.  Is there a Chinese or Japanese embassy nearby where the foreign trainees can request asylum?

Now Ma Soon Ho brings out a rubber boat, and they have to run a course with it.  Not everything is translated here, which is frustrating, but I understand that if they finish all this training successfully, they get a barbecue.  I can only imagine how Haru is going to describe Korean camping trips to his family if he ever sees them again.

They succeed and get their barbecue, and then we get their voiceovers saying that today’s experience will help them do better on the Plan 5 mission, which is, if you recall, shooting a music video.  I can’t imagine how, but if they say so. 

They light up a huge campfire.  “I can’t believe all 21 of us are here!” says Jin Bo Min.  “We’ve grown so fond of each other,” Kaira agrees.  Oof.  Was Seok June already planning to leave when this was being said?

Suddenly, a screen on the other side of the campfire lights up.  They get to watch footage from the very first episode, which was filmed three months ago.  I feel nostalgic with them.  I miss the animated demon face and dark alleyways.  This show really changed its whole tone after that first episode.

The screening goes on to show them footage from the other episodes as well.  They have been through a lot.  Several of the trainees start crying.  We see that during Plan 2, Chu Yoo Chan got a surprise birthday party.

This is a very sweet and emotional scene, and I’m really glad that Seok June got to experience this before he left.  Speaking of our boy, he gets a confessional at the campsite.  He looks happy.  “I feel amazing,” he tells us.  “I wish the time would just stop.” 

The trainees get back on the bus and return to the campus to work on the video.  Everyone looks focused this time.  They’ve broken up into teams and are practicing the choreo all over the campus.  Team Leader Kim Ji Yong is pleased.  They start doing a run-through of the video, filming on an iPad.  This is going to be exciting.

They start setting up props around campus, discussing camera angles and transitions.  I can’t wait to see this video.  We watch the countdown until they have only 24 hours until D-Day.  Time for final rehearsal. 

Team Leader Kim Ji Yong walks around with a microphone, making sure everyone’s in place, and he realizes that Team 5 is missing.  They find Team 5, but now other trainees start forgetting their cues.  Please tell me this is just the Flashback Formula at work again, without an actual flashback. 

Tempers flare.  People worry.  They rehearse a part where everyone runs to the dome, and they’re all in each other’s way.  This is starting to look really sloppy, but again, I think it’s just the show creating drama.

Finally, it’s D-Day.  They do some quick, last-minute rehearsals.  The campus looks amazing.  Let’s do this.

I love every second of this.  I love seeing how the technical side works with the performances.  It’s stressful and crazy and so much fun, and I can’t believe they pulled it off.  That mudflat training camp is really something.

Our trainees are celebrating.  The Five Plans are finally finished.  Now all that’s left in this series is the gut-wrenching process of seeing who gets to debut and who gets eliminated.

But first, we need to choose our new Top 7, and this time the trainees do the voting  After leading this project, Kim Ji Yong had better be one of them.

Our new Top 7 is:

Kim Ji Yong.  Damn right.

Jang Kyu Hyun.  For someone who started this show in the Yellow Team Beginner Group, he has come a long way.  This is his fourth time in the Top 7.

Park Won Bon.  Our second-longest Starship trainee has been one of my picks from the beginning.  This is also his fourth time on the podium.

Haru.  He starred in an amazing dance break in the Plan 5 video, and I just know he’s going to make it to the end.  I’m glad the show stopped pushing the rivalry edit with Kaira.

Kim Min Jae.  He killed in the Killing Part of the Plan 5 video.  This is his second time on the podium.

Jang Yong Hoon.  A fan favorite in the online voting.

Park Seong Hyeon.  Came back from illness to earn his way onto the podium.

The Starnouncer tells them this was the last episode to be filmed on this campus.  The final episodes will be filmed somewhere else.  The trainees are sad to say goodbye to this beautiful place, and I’m right there with them.  Starship really knows how to do set design.

We’re reminded again to vote every day at newkids.co.kr, and now we can only vote for one trainee.

Before posting this recap, I tired again to find more details on why Seok June left.  Instead, I found an article on Sportkeeda.com with the news that his fans are swearing off the remaining episodes.  Come on, guys.  You know Seok June wouldn’t want that.  Whatever reservations he had about staying on the show, we saw him bond with the other trainees.  I just know he wants to see them succeed.  Don’t write off the rest of these hopefuls just because one guy left.

Besides, he could have left for a good reason.  One fan quoted in the article says Starship still hadn’t signed contracts with the trainees, so maybe he got scouted by another company or switched to acting.  While I want to emphasize that we have no confirmation on any of this, I really hope it’s true.

Next up, the semi-final round!  The next episode will drop on my birthday, so watching it while enjoying a slice of banana rum cake will be a fun way to celebrate.  See you then!

[catch-me-hello]

I'm watching the K-drama the NewKids filmed after the last episode of Debut's Plan, and it’s really good! These kids aren't half bad actors.

[catch-me-hello]

Debut’s Plan – Episode 6:  New Characters Emerge

It’s a good thing I don’t work in K-pop.  My picks rarely make it into the final group.  My favorites on this show aren’t doing well.  A survival show run by me would have to be called Debut Duds, and the band name would be No Future.  I’d probably have to fit an ampersand in there somewhere, but you get the point.

So with that cheerful intro, welcome to Episode Six!  Our trainees will be doing Plan 4 today, which will be Expression.  We’re going to see a lot of acting in this episode.  Let’s do this.

We start with our trainees gathering at the main dome, where they find a classroom setup. 

Our Starnouncer appears on the dome to greet them.  It welcomes back Park Seong Hyeon, who missed Plans 2 and 3 due to illness.  He’s recovered and says he is determined to be in the Top 7 this time.

Our trainees learn that Plan 4 is about Expression, and they are now in acting school.  One of my picks, Park Won Bin, is actually an art major in college who studies acting, so he’s got an advantage.  He’s not the only one.  Baek Jun Hyuk was a child actor.  And an incredibly adorable one at that.

Our acting teacher for today is popular Korean actor Eum Moon Seok.  Right away, I’m enjoying this class.  Our teacher makes the point that K-pop idols are at a disadvantage, having to express emotion in a 3-minute song that K-drama actors have several onscreen hours to express.  Plus, actors don’t also have to concentrate on singing and dancing.

Our trainees watch clips from famous Korean movies and K-dramas.  These are the clips they will be performing.  I’m fascinated with Eum Moon Seok’s teaching techniques.  He shows them how to unleash the full power of their voices, find the context of each scene, and get into the characters’ heads.  I would pay to take acting classes from this guy.

The trainees start performing their scenes.  Jang Yong Hoon, Wu Hao, and Lee Woo Ju give impressive monologues.  I may not understand the language or know the original scenes, but I can feel the emotion through the computer screen.

They also do a great improvisation exercise when a prop phone doesn’t ring when it’s supposed to, so our trainees have to keep their monologue going until it finally rings.  As there survival shows for aspiring K-drama actors?  I’d love to watch one of those.

I’d be fine with the class going on for the rest of the episode, but Eum Moon Seok has a gift for the trainees before he leaves.  It’s a script for a K-drama written for this show.  It’s called Imperfect Game.  The trainees are going to audition for the roles and film it.

The synopsis is this: 

Once aiming to win the national high school baseball tournament, the Woojoo High Baseball Team dreamed of winning the Phoenix Flag.  But after a scandal scattered its members, the team is on the brink of disbanding.  A new transfer student appears, hoping to restore the glory of Woojoo High, and begins gathering the team members again.  What will be the fate of the Woojoo High Baseball Team?

If this show came up on my Netflix suggestion list, I would totally watch it.

Seven of the 21 trainees will be cast in lead roles.  The others will be supporting role characters and extras.  The trainees will have five days to rehearse for the lead role auditions.  This will be especially hard for the Japanese and Chinese members, who will have to read, memorize, and deliver lines in Korean. 

Let’s pause for a quick tangent.  Park Won Bin is wearing an eye patch in this episode. 

I’ve seen trainees wearing eye patches in almost all of these survival shows, and I thought it must be a popular fashion statement in Korea, because not all of them could be getting that many eye injuries.  But then I did some checking.  Yes, sometimes it is a fashion statement.  But most of the time, they really are getting eye infections.  Idols wear makeup and colored contacts so often, their eyes are prone to irritation and infections.  Idols may also wear eye patches when recovering from double eyelid surgery.  Ah, the perils of staying beautiful.

Back to our show.  The scene that everyone wants to do is one with a fight scene in it, and the trainees doing that one really seem to enjoy rehearsals.  A lot of aggression is being worked out here.  I hope no one gets hurt.  Park Jun Hwan, the trainee who originally wanted to be a baseball player, is really connecting with his character.  The whole rehearsal process is mesmerizing to watch. 

Meanwhile, the foreign trainees struggle to read their lines.  We get a great moment when 14 year-old Lee Woo Ju has to explain the Korean word for “agony” to his Japanese scene partner Haru.  He says, “Imagine you got eliminated from this show.”  That’s all he needs to say.  Haru immediately gets it.  Lee Woo Ju turns out to be a great acting coach for both his non-Korean scene partners and should probably try that as a career if K-pop doesn’t work out for him.

During rehearsal week, the Starnouncer calls them back to the main dome.  Another acting coach is coming in to help.  He strolls in, casually dressed in sandals and shorts, which throws everyone off a bit.  This is acting coach Kim Si Hoon.

The only person I can find online with that name is a Korean baseball player with the NC Dinos, so I don’t think this Mr. Kim is a celebrity, other than being on this show.  Still, he has an impressive resume.  He has a Master’s in Acting from the Royal Academy of Dramatic Art.  And this man is not fooling around.  “You need to think of yourselves as actors, and I will treat you like actors,” he tells our trainees.  “Not being good at acting isn’t the issue.  But doing it half-heartedly is a problem.”  The trainees all stand up a bit straighter and look more alert.

Our trainees are told to remove their socks and go barefoot.  I really hope that floor has been scrubbed.  We already have one trainee with an eye infection.

The trainees walk around barefoot and are told to pay attention to their feelings.  “What are you feeling?” Kim Si Hoon demands in a booming voice.  “My feet hurt,” mutters Lee Woo Ju. 

This acting coach is like a drill instructor, clapping a specific number of times for each instruction.  He has them do exercises like pairing up, standing close together, and not breaking eye contact for several minutes.  As an introvert, this looks like total hell to me.  But then something very interesting happens.  After having them stare into each other’s eyes, Kim Si Hoon claps three times and tells them to start saying their lines.  When they do, they are fully immersed in their characters in a way they weren’t before.  They’ve been transformed.

They go on to do exercises in movement, voice work, and imagination, and I am really enjoying this.  I’m getting acting classes from experts for just the cost of my Viki subscription.

Before we know it, D-Day is here.  It’s Audition Day for the lead roles in Imperfect Game.  Our board members and judges gather to watch them through a video feed.  The choreographers are not with them this time.  Instead, Kim Si Hoon is joining them.

One by one, the teams take the stage and perform their scenes.  First up is the fight scene, which takes place in a classroom.

I am so caught up in these performances and don’t want to pause to take notes.  The trainees are immersed in their characters, and I’m immersed in the performances.

I am curious about one thing.  This classroom scene begins with a student walking in to see another student asleep at his desk.  The light is shining on the sleeping student’s face, so the first student sits in front of him and uses his hand to block the light.  This is a scene I remember vividly from TAN’s “Walking on the Moon” video.  Taehoon is the student asleep at his desk, and Jooan walks in, sees the light on his face, and closes the curtains to block the light.

When I first saw the TAN video, I just thought this was just a romantic scene.  But now I’m wondering if it’s based on a famous scene in a Korean movie or K-drama.  This scene, used in this music video and again on this survival show, is way too specific to just be a coincidence.  If any of my readers know, please speak up in the comments.  If it is a trope, I’d love to see the original source.

Next up is another confrontation/argument scene, where we learn that one of the baseball players had suffered an injury that may be related to the scandal that pulled the team apart.

Jang Yong Hoon’s performance brings me to tears.  He has trouble with expression when he sings, but as an actor, he shines.  Same with Seok June, who gives a powerful, believable performance.

I’ve been waiting anxiously for Hanu’s turn.  He’s been working so hard with the Korean language and trying to sound like a native Korean speaker while at the same time giving the scene the emotion it demands. 

He’s amazing.  The coaches love it.  They ask him to do it again in his native language, and it’s fascinating to see how he physically relaxes into the role when he’s more comfortable with the language.  When he’s done, one of the coaches asks, “Should we change the script to Japanese?”  Something tells me Haru just won a lead role.

Fellow Japanese trainee Kaira is up next, and he faces the same challenges.  He’s always shown great expression in his performances, so I’m really looking forward to this.

It’s a small part, but the coaches say he speaks like a native Korean.  He overcomes the language barrier to impress the coaches with just a few lines.

Park Won Bin has the hindrance of the eye patch, but he shows so much passion in his monologue.  The coaches can’t take their eyes off him.

Now we come crashing down with a very uncomfortable sequence of events, which we get in a flashback.  Trainee Kim Min Jae has a real struggle with Plan 4.  He’s just not good at acting, and since he’s a perfectionist, he wants to give up since he can’t do it perfectly.   Remember when we first met our acting coach Kim Si Hoon, and he said, “Not being good at acting isn’t the issue.  But doing it half-heartedly is a problem”?  Well, Kim Min Jae’s rehearsal in front of the class is worse than half-hearted.  He’s barely trying.  And Kim Si Hoon is NOT happy about it.

In front of the entire class, the teacher makes Kim Min Jae bend over, stick his tongue out, and say his lines loudly enough for everyone to hear.  I’m dying a million deaths for him.

As horrifying as this is to watch, it does seem to work.  When Kim Min Jae stands back up, he looks completely broken, but he’s able to say the lines with expression.

Then he breaks down in tears in front of everyone.  For several agonizing minutes, everyone just watches him sob.  This is so hard to watch.  Finally, everyone gets up to hug him, and I think we’re supposed to see this as a healing and heartwarming ending.  I’m emotionally exhausted at this point.  This has been an intense episode.

The flashback ends, and we see him do his final audition on D-Day.  He looks drained  The coaches applaud his effort but say he was too low-energy.  All I can think is, leave him alone.  Lord knows how many hours he’s going to spend in therapy because of this.

The auditions are over.  Now the board and the coaches need to assign the Top 7 roles so we can film this thing and see who makes up our new Top 7.  They are:

Park Won Bin, Chu Yoo Chan, Jang Yong Hoon

Baek Jun Hyuk, Haru

(A special note about Haru:  He did so well that his character, who is supposed to be from America, is changed to Japanese instead.  The coaches loved his performance that much.)

And finally,

Jang Jyu Hyun and Seok June

We end with some clips from the resulting K-drama.  The clips are not translated, so I don’t know what’s going on.  But thankfully, Park Won Bin’s eye seems to have healed.

We get a reminder to vote for our two favorite NewKids (I really don’t like that name) at newkids.co.kr.  Can we write in a vote to change the name?  Starship, you came up with badass group names like Monsta X and Cravity, and now you show up limping to the party with the name NewKids?  I can come up with better names using the online K-pop Group Name Generator.  Even The Eye Patch Crew would be a better name.

Whatever.  I need sleep.  From the previews, it looks like next week, we’re going on a road trip.  See you then!

Road Trippers.  Even THAT would be a better name than NewKids.  Geez.

[catch-me-hello]

It's Starship Day!

The next episode of Debut's Plan drops today on YouTube! Recap coming this weekend.

[catch-me-hello]

Voting two at a time...

It's a little frustrating that we can only vote for two trainees on Debut's Plan now, so I'm switching my votes around for my top favorites each day. Don't forget to vote at https://newkids.co.kr , and a new episode drops tomorrow!

[catch-me-hello]

Gearing up for a K-pop Weekend!

VERY excited to be recapping the next episode of Debut’s Plan this weekend! I should have that recap online by Saturday evening.  In the meantime, I’m watching a 2024 survival show just for fun – Project 7 on Viki.  I’m only on Episode 1, and a trainee has dared to audition with EXO’s “Mama,” one of the hardest songs to sing in K-pop.  He nailed it.  See you all this weekend, and don’t forget to vote for your favorite NewKids trainees at newkids.co.kr!

[catch-me-hello]

Debut’s Plan, Episode 5 – Giving Us Signs

Happy Minhyuk and I.M Day, fellow Monbebes!  Our Monsta X idols are finally making an appearance here in Episode 5, so let’s do this.

We learn in the previews that Plan 3 will be about communication.  We get interview clips with our Chinese and Japanese contestants who tell us how they’ve been struggling to learn Korean.  I can’t imagine trying to make it through one of these shows without fully understanding the language.  Back on Boys Planet, we learned that Mnet didn’t even provide translators.  I don’t think Starship is providing them either, as we see these trainees asking the Korean trainees for help understanding the instructions.

It’s not just the spoken language.  It’s also written.  We see Kaira, who is Japanese, asking the Korean trainees how to write certain words.  Now I’m wondering how the frustration of the language barrier is affecting the way Kaira behaves on this show.  He’s being framed as brash and overly competitive, but I remember how easily frustrated and angry I got as an exchange student in Barcelona.  That’s not who I truly was, and I don’t think we’re seeing the real Kaira either.

I want to add this interesting journal page from Japanese trainee Haru.

I like that the journal instructions tell him to draw his feelings, which doesn’t require language, and then I realize the journal instructions are in English.  No wonder his drawing looks a bit like a person losing his mind.

Now we cut to the main stage area.  All the trainees are gathered to learn more about Plan 3.  Our Star Announcer tells them that communication with the fans is very important, as the fans protect their idols.  (I want very much to add that some of the more toxic fans will turn against their idols over the dumbest things, but let’s just move on for now.  Riize is seven, justice for Seunghan, now back to our show.)

Under our third plan, we have categories of foreign language, social media, and concept.  (In K-pop, “concept” is what we Americans would call “branding.”  It’s the theme and style of the group and their songs.)  The concepts our trainees are going to try to communicate fall under “Boyhood,” “Crush,” and “Fantasy.”  Right away, our older trainees want nothing to do with the boyhood concept, and I’ve seen enough of these shows to know why.  Total pretty boy idol cringe territory.

Now for the songs.  For “Boyhood,” it’s “Chewing Gum” by NCT Dream.  I pull up the video, and 30 seconds into it, I get diabetes.  I’ve never been a fan of the pretty boy idol stuff.  This is going to be PAINFUL.

For “Crush,” the song is “Case 143” by Stray Kids.  NOW we’re talking!  Even the cutest Stray Kids videos are full of swagger.  The main concern for the trainees is trying to match Felix’s deep DEEP voice.

For “Fantasy,” the song is “XO Only if You Say Yes” by Enhypen.  Love the song, love the group.  After recapping I-Land, it’s great to hear Enhypen again.  This song doesn’t go as hard as the Stray Kids song, but it’s more smooth and soulful.  I can’t wait to see what these trainees do with it.

We get a long segment where the guys choose their teams, each going to the designated practice room.

Strangely, everyone is avoiding the Stray Kids song because of the intense rap and difficult choreography.  Come on, guys!  Do you want to be idols or not?  We finally get Seok June and Wu Hao on board as the first two to give it a shot.  I also just realized that the trainees now have their rankings posted on their name tags.

We get another great shot of the campus during all this decision-making, and I just want to live here.

The whole team-choosing process takes up almost 30 minutes of runtime, and I’m sure it’s suspenseful and fun for some K-pop fans, but I want to see some performances already.  Also, I was promised Minhyuk and I.M.  Where are they?

When the teams are finally chosen, the Starnouncer has some more news.  The trainees will be performing their songs in different languages from the original versions.  “Case 143” will be in Japanese, “Chewing Gum” in Chinese, and “XO” in English.  The XO Team is happy because English lessons are very common in Korea, so this won’t be too hard.  The other two teams are stressing out.

More news – the next Top 7 team will be chosen not just by the coaches and judges, but also 70 other Starship judges who are actual Starship employees.  The Starnouncer goes on to explain more voting rules, but as with everything that involves math, my brain just kind of switches off.

We jump ahead to rehearsals for Team Chewing Gum (Chinese).  Haru and Kaira are on this team, and I’m glad they’ll be working together.  I’ve been voting for both of them since the start of this show.  They do start competing again, though, as the team has to choose an ID Member.  I’ve never heard that term, but I think they mean the Center Visual. 

Now we jump ahead to the midpoint evaluation for all the teams.  Our regular coaches/judges announce that a special trainer will be joining them.  Could it be … YES!  It’s I.M!

Our trainees are going nuts, and I’m chair-dancing with joy.  He introduces himself to our starstruck trainees.  As he talks in that smooth, low voice, I feel my toes melting into the floor.

Team Chewing Gum (Chinese) has their eval first.  They’ve been learning this song phonetically and are very nervous.  It shows.  They’re off-key because they’re focusing on trying to remember the unfamiliar words.  The intense concentration is keeping them from giving good expression.  They’re a mess.

When they finish, I.M says, “When you chew gum for too long, it becomes hard.  I think you guys looked pretty stiff overall.”  The other judges suggest they have Haru be their ID Member instead of Starship Legend Kim Ji Yong.

The XO (English) team has their eval next.  Since “XO” means “kisses and hugs,” one of the judges asks if any of them have ever been kissed.  That would be an uncomfortable question in America, but here, it’s wildly inappropriate.  I.M protests, and all the trainees look shocked.  The judge backs down.  Wow, that just sucked all the air right out of the entire campus.

Team XO (English) recovers and does their rehearsal.  They have the same problem as Team Chewing Gum, but worse.  I can’t carry a tune in a bucket, but even I could do better. 

Thankfully, we only see about ten seconds of this.  I’m guessing any more would violate Korean decency in broadcasting laws.  They really need to replace Lee Jun Seo as their main vocalist, but they’re stubborn and don’t want to.

Now for our Stray Kids Case 143 (Japanese) Team, the one I’m most looking forward to.  And just as they start the choreo, we cut to black.  The scene comes back, cutting to after they have finished.  We don’t get to see any of it, but from the judges’ stoney stares, I’m guessing this team spent the rehearsal making obscene gestures and burning the Korean flag.

The room is dead quiet.  Then Choreographer Choi Young Jun just tells them to leave.  The performance was so bad, he literally has no words except to say, “Please leave.”  I feel embarrassed, and I’m not even the one he’s mad at.  What the hell happened on that stage?

Team Stray Kids returns to their rehearsal room in tears.  Then the show decides to rewind to the day before the midpoint eval.  The team has just come together, and half of them are upset because they wanted to be on Team XO instead, but that team had too many members, so they were voted out.

The members who chose to be in this group are trying to move the process along, but the ones forced to be here are sulking and refusing to participate.  I just Googled pictures of Stray Kids, and their leader Bang Chan looks pretty ripped.  Someone send him in there to kick their asses.

After two hours, they still haven’t gotten anywhere.  They can’t even decide how to divide up the parts.  Maknae trainee Lee Woo Ju says he has to go to the bathroom and instead disappears into a lounge area to mope.

I’m getting really pissed off.  Survival shows are full of teams that don’t get the song they originally wanted.  It happens in almost every single mission on every single show.  If these kids can’t hack it, eliminate them now and replace them with any other trainees who would give anything for a chance to debut.

Now we cut to 30 minutes before the midpoint eval.  This team is just now halfheartedly trying to learn the choreo.  They can’t even get through the song once, and now it’s their turn in front of the judges.  I wonder how they’ll feel when they realize I.M from Monsta X will be watching them.

The song starts.  Wu Hao forgets the opening rap and decides to hum it instead, which is certainly a choice.  The dance formation immediately falls apart, and they all start aimlessly hopping around the stage.  If I were on this team, I would have faked an illness or deliberately injured myself to keep from getting up there and embarrassing myself like this.  Although I can’t help laughing at the panel’s reaction.

The whole thing abruptly ends.  I sincerely hope Stray Kids never sees this footage.  Judge Kim In Kyu can only stammer, “What do you guys even want?”  I.M is more to the point, telling them they need to be way more desperate.  The team is dismissed, and Choi Young Jun tells them if they can’t do better, they shouldn’t come back.

They return to rehearsal but can’t stop arguing.  Judge Kim In Kyu comes in and asks what their problem is, and again they complain that half the team didn’t want to do this song.  Someone please duct tape this team to a sofa and make them watch all 29 hours of Boys Planet.  That oughta put things in perspective for them.

Kim In Kyu gives them the kind of scolding that provides that perspective, basically telling them to get it together or just go home.  YES.  Time for these brats to grow up.

We now move on to footage of all the teams rehearsing.  Then the Starnouncer appears on monitors in the rehearsal rooms with yet another newsflash.  Bang Chan is here, and he brought a bat.  No, sorry.  The news is that they are to stop rehearsing and gather at the main dome, where Bang Chan is waiting with a bat.  Okay, I’ll stop, I promise.

They gather at the main dome.  The Starnouncer tells them a new part is being added to their choreo.  The second verse of each performance will be communicated in sign language.  I love this idea.  Not only is it a creative challenge, but maybe being forced to consider what it’s like for hearing-impaired K-pop fans will make them quit complaining about their own stupid problems like not getting the song they wanted.

Our sign language instructor is Kim Ji Yeon, and she has a gorgeous smile that lights up the whole campus.  She’s also a rapper, and I immediately followed her on Instagram (jiyeon._.kim).  I love her energy.  She gives them an introductory lesson in sign language, and the mood in the room starts feeling a lot more positive.

Kim Ji Yeon on the show, and a clip from her Instagram

Finally, it’s D-Day.  Our trainees get all pretty in hair and makeup.  The 70 Starship employees take their seats in the main dome.  Our board members and coaches are watching remotely on a screen.  The 70 staff members will be the only audience.  Everyone cheers as a new emcee arrives.  Of course, we know who it is.  Minhyuk has finally arrived!

He explains the voting process, but I’m too dreamy-eyed to listen.  Ten years in Monsta X and 18 months in the military, and he still looks amazing.  It’s so good to see him again.  He gives a shout-out to Kim Ji Yeon, who’s sitting with the 70 employees.  We also meet Choreographer Son Hye Yeon, who taught the trainees a dance style called tutting.  This is a street dance style named after King Tut for its use of angular movements and shapes.  These kids couldn’t get a rehearsal together a week ago, and now they’re learning sign language and a new, very difficult style of dance.

We’re starting with Team Chewing Gum (Chinese).  It’s our Pretty Boy Idol song, and they’re all dressed in sailor suits.  Kill me now.

No, no.  I can do this.  We get a flashback.  I skip the flashback.  This episode is an unnecessarily long two and a half hours, and I’m way past ready to see a D-Day Performance.

Both Haru and Kaira had better make it into the final group.  As much as the Pretty Boy Idol concept isn’t for me, they absolutely shine in this performance, especially with the sign language and tutting, and Haru even gets some b-boy moves in.  The judges agree Haru really stood out.  The boys leave the stage happily, expressing their thanks in sign language.

Next up, Team Case 143 (Japanese).  The absolute worst team in the rehearsals.  The ones with the worst attitude.  They take the stage and introduce themselves in sign language.  Not a bad start.  Again, I skip the flashback.  Ready or not, it’s Showtime.

Best performance of the series so far.  They nail the insanely complicated choreography in a performance that will make the real Stray Kids proud.  I’m pulling for them to win.

Last up is Team XO (English).  I skip through the flashback.  Let’s do this.

It’s smooth and sensual.  They do a really good job, but for me, it lacks the excitement and complexity of the Stray Kids performance.  The judges are going nuts, though, so this is probably the group that’s going to win.  My heart sinks a little because one of the rules is that the team that wins this mission will make up the new Top 7.

With the performances over, the votes are counted.

Third place is Case 143.  I yelled at my computer.  They had the hardest choreography and gave the most high energy performance.  They deserve way better.  I really hate this.

First and second place are just a 2-vote difference.  Team XO is first, Chewing Gum is second.

Our new Top 7

So we have our new Top 7.  They will get to perform a ballad version of the signal song with choreo that includes sign language.  They will also get a concept photo shoot. 

I’m happy for them, but I’m bummed that the ones I’ve been voting for seem to be slipping down in the rankings.  And now when you go to vote at newkids.co.kr, you’ll see that we can only vote for two from now on instead of seven. 

That’s okay.  I’ll keep voting and keeping my fingers crossed for my fading favorites.  In the meantime, I’ll see if Bang Chan will loan me that bat.  I’ve got some aggression to work out.  If I don’t wind up in jail, I’ll see you next episode.

[catch-me-hello]

Debut’s Plan, Episode 4:  Big Names and Power Moves

MAN, it’s hard waiting each week for new episodes!  Welcome to Episode 4, with our so-called “Weakness” Plan, a chance to find out why Haru has lost all hope, and the possibility that we’ll finally get to see Minhyuk hosting this thing.  Let’s goooooo!

We open with everyone rehearsing for the Plan 2 performances.  Meanwhile, a blurred-out person is walking through the campus.  He’s impressed with the whole setup.  The camera pulls out, and – HEY!  It’s Johnny from NCT 127!

The trainees see Johnny walking past their rehearsal rooms and start freaking out.  They all gather to sit with him.  Johnny asks them how they handle the stress of being on this show.  They confess to eating snacks.  Johnny wants to show them another way and asks for a full-length mirror, which the production team scrambles to get him.

Johnny sits in front of the mirror and gives himself a pep talk.  Then he has Legendary Trainee Kim Ji Yong give it a try, and I can tell our boy is uncomfortable doing this in front of a group.  Hey trainees, I’m sure this is a healthy and positive way to deal with stress, but if this isn’t your speed, I have an American method.  It’s called the Denial, Avoidance, and Stress-Eating Method.  All you need is a bag of Fritos and a Netflix series, and you too can forget all your troubles.

Moving on.

The aespa Girls Vocal Team is rehearsing.  They choose Kim Min Jae as their leader and start dividing up the parts.  At one point, Kim Min Jae decides he wants to be the Main Vocalist as well, which is quite the power move.  The rest of the team looks off-camera and asks the crew of that’s okay and get a yes.  So Kim Min Jae gets both stickers.  I’d like to see him start gunning for the Lead Dancer and Center positions and cause some REAL drama.

Now we hop over to the IVE Shine With Me vocal group.  This team has my pick Kaira as the Leader.  He tells the others he chose them for his team because he believes in them.  Then, in a confessional, he says he chose them because he can beat them.  I couldn’t help laughing.  I know it’s mean, but I do like this kid.

We get some tension as they choose a Main Vocalist.  It’s the usual ego-bruising.  As they rehearse, we get some great shots of the campus.  This place really is amazing.

The Shine With Me Team stumbles a bit in the midpoint eval, with Seok June struggling to stay on tempo and Park Jun Hwan veering wildly off-key.  Kaira’s evil plan may be working.  The vocal coaches are NOT happy, telling the team they don’t think it’s possible for them to be ready to perform by the deadline.  DUN DUN DUNNNNNN….

As Team Shine With Me goes back to rehearsal, we get two more blurry figures approaching their practice studio.  Who are the new guest stars?  It’s Rei and Liz from IVE!  The very group whose song our team is rehearsing!  It looks like they’re bringing pizza.

I have to hand it to our trainees – they are able to speak to women.  Yes, they’re a little shy and nervous, but they’re able to talk to Rei and Liz without trying to tunnel out of the building and flee the campus. 

They talk about the song and how emotional it is.  As they discuss expression, the other trainees spot the two idols through the windows and gather around the building in shock.  The women invite them in.  They all eat pizza and drink from Pepsi bottles with the logos facing the camera and taking up half the screen in extreme close-ups.  Rei and Liz give them a pep talk about overcoming their weaknesses, because we have to stick to the theme of this mission.

Both women are very sweet, especially Liz when she talks about dealing with anxiety.  I mean it as a compliment when I say that here, they seem less like idols and more like relatable, likeable human beings.

Now for Team So Good, led by our Starship Trainee Legend, Kim Ji Yong.  We jump ahead to their midpoint eval, and Liz and Rei are joining the coaches.  We learn that this team has been a mess all week, spending more time on changing parts than learning the actual choreo.  Kim Ji Yong was scolded by the coaches during this time for his lack of leadership.  He took it very hard.

The midpoint eval goes much better.  I love the song.  Now we jump ahead to the final performance on D-Day, no setup or anything.  Okay, I guess we’re doing this!

This is a total summer jam, and I love it.  The choreo has a breezy, laid-back vibe to it.  If this is the kind of choreo Kim Ji Yong writes, he might be the next legendary choreographyer on these survival show judging panels.  The judges love it, too.  Even K.Will has nothing but praise.  That seems out of character.  Can someone make sure he’s okay?

Speaking of okay, it’s time for Dance Team We’re OK to perform.  (They’re shortcutting the name “I’m OK You’re OK,” which is fine with me because these song titles are already giving me carpel tunnel.)

We get a flashback to their midpoint eval, which, judging by everyone’s reaction, isn’t going so well.

This group is kind of all over the place.  You know it’s bad when they finish, and after a long pause, Choreographer Choi Young Jun’s first words are, “I will try to control my rage.”  Kim In Kyu says, “I feel like we’ve been tricked.”

I’m embarrassed on the group’s behalf, even though I know this is just the Flashback Formula at work.  Choi Young Jun is so mad, he replaces Jeong Se Min’s lead position with Haru.  It’s clear that Haru is carrying the team.  Later, in rehearsal, Haru breaks down from the pressure.  This is why we saw him crying last week.  He doesn’t want the lead spot and have to do the formation over again, especially since the final performance is the next day.

We don’t get to see them resolve this.  Instead, we skip ahead to D-Day.  If I know the Flashback Formula, this will be a perfect performance.  The group tells us in voiceovers that they were up all night changing the choreo.  It looks like Haru is now the lead dancer.  Let’s do this.

It’s fabulous.  The judges are cheering and laughing all through it.  It’s bouncy and happy and fun.  The judges applaud wildly at the end.  This group has redeemed themselves, which is a big relief for me because two of my voting picks (Jo Min Jae and Haru) are on this team.  (Don’t forget to vote at newkids.co.kr!)

But these shows don’t let us be too happy for long.  Jeong Se Min starts to cry because he made a mistake during the performance.  I didn’t even catch it, but I guess the judges did.  I would never, ever want to be a K-pop trainee.  Then Haru breaks down.  All these guys need a good night’s sleep immediately.

Now for the vocal group doing aespa’s “Girls.”  My pick Park Won Bin is in this group, as well as the all-powerful Kim Min Jae, who is both Leader and Main Vocalist.  In a flashback, we watch them bicker over the other vocal parts.  This goes on for a while.

As the flashback goes on, both vocal groups meet for a training session, and we get another celebrity visitor.

Oh my God, it’s Soyou!  I remember her from No Mercy!  Of course, she’s more well-known for being in the group SISTAR and being an amazing singer.  But I’ll always remember her as the No Mercy judge that Minhyuk had a crush on.  Does Minhyuk know she’s here now?  How romantic would it be if they reconnected on this show?  Someone write that and turn it into a K-drama!  Call it “No Mercy on My Heart.” 

Our group performs the song for her, and they are awful.  I actually had to turn the volume way down until they were finished.  Soyou does NOT look happy.  Back into rehearsal they go. 

But wait – we’re back to the “Trade Day” gimmick from the last episode, where the team leaders can choose to swap teammates.  Not this again.

I’ve already made it clear in the last episode’s recap how much I hate this.  In the end, Jin Bo Min gets sent to Team Shine With Me.  No exchanges, just booting him over to the other team.

Back to D-Day.  Time for “Girls.”  Let’s see how they do after kicking Jin Bo Min to the curb.

Badass.  Totally dark, mysterious, and badass.  Also, their costumes rock.  Park Won Bin steals the show for me, but the trainees backstage say Kim Min Jae carried the whole team.  The judges love them all, singling out both Park Won Bin and Kim Min Jae for credit.  A huge success.

Now for Team Shine With Me.  The bar has been set sky-high.  We get a flashback of them working with Soyou.  Remember, this is Kaira’s team that he picked to be worse than him.  And boy, are they.  While Soyou nods in approval at Kaira’s singing, she visibly cringes at the others.  It’s so bad that Soyou finally cuts the music and puts a stop to the whole thing.

After the session, Seok June looks traumatized.

He says he knows he’s not a good singer.  He didn’t need a famous vocalist reminding him of that.  So why is he trying to get into K-pop if he can’t sing?  I know we’ve covered this before, but it’s so cruel for entertainment companies to shove these trainees without talent onto these survival shows. 

During a rehearsal in front of the judges, the team walks onstage without Park Seong Hyeon because he’s sick.  As they rehearse, Seok June actually sounds worse than before.  Kaira, your team appears to be cursed.

I just hope they don’t crash and burn.  We’re now at D-Day.  Showtime.

Gorgeous, sad, and beautiful.  Kaira holds a long, powerful note, and I had no idea he could sing this well.  When the song ends, he’s actually crying.  The judges are moved.  They say that this group has potential as vocalists, even though it’s not their strongest talent.  I think I finally see the point of a Weakness Mission.

Okay.  Performances are done.  Time to find out who are new Top 7 is.  Everyone gathers in front of the 7-spot podium.  We see the overall rankings, but again, I can’t read Korean.  Our new Top 7 is:

Park Won Bin, one of my picks.  He stays on the podium.

Wu Hao, our passionate performer and another one of my picks.

Kaira.  He’s improving with every episode.  He stays on the podium and will keep getting my vote.

Park Won Bin, Wu Hao, and Kaira

Kim Min Jae.  This is his first time in the Top 7.

Starship Legend Trainee Kim Ji Yong stays on the podium.  So far, one person will be getting kicked off the podium, but we don’t know which one yet.

Lee Woo Ju, our 14 year-old maknae.  It’s his first time in the Top 7, so that’s two trainees who are about to lose their Top 7 rankings.

Kim Min Jae, Kim Ji Yong, and Lee Woo Ju

And finally,

Baek Jun Hyuk.  First time in the Top 7.

So that means Chu Yoo Chan, Jang Kyu Hyun, and Jang Yong Hoon have all lost their Top 7 status.

Baek Jun Hyuk, Chu Yoo Chan, Jang Kyu Hyun, and Jang Yong Hoon

Here are the overall rankings, for those of you who can read Korean.

We’re reminded again to vote for our Top 7 favorites at newkids.co.kr.  I have a bad feeling about my top pick, Six Singers trainee Jo Min Jae.  I really don’t want to see him miss another shot.

We get a preview of next week, and finally, Minhyuk will be here!  And oh my God – is that I.M, also from Monsta X?!

OH MY GOD IT IS!!!  IT REALLY IS!!!  I CAN’T FRIGGIN BELIEVE IT I FEEL DIZZY – <CRASH>

[catch-me-hello]

Debut’s Plan, Episode 3:  Second Plan, same as the first.

Welcome back!  It looks like episodes are dropping every Friday.  As for when we will finally see Minhyuk, I posted the question on Reddit and got a response that he was still in the military when the early episodes were filmed.  Given that they started filming in early September, and Minhyuk wasn’t discharged until a month later, he probably won’t appear until Episode Four or Five. 

Also, the interim stats are up for online votes.  Check them out at newkids.co.kr.  Don’t forget, you can vote for your Top 7 favorites every 24 hours.  Meanwhile, it’s time to see the vocal performances for the First Plan of Strength.  Let’s dive in!

Those of us who don’t speak or read Korean are still at a disadvantage, because only what is said is translated, not the words on the screen.  So we see journal entries and other notes written in Korean and don’t know what they say.  If any Korean-fluent readers watching the show want to help out in the comments, please do so.

First up in the vocal category is Team Monster, and I’m very excited because this is Jo Min Jae’s team, our Six Singers guy.  He’s on the team with Haru, and when I posted on Reddit that I didn’t understand why he was picked for a vocal team, I was told that he actually volunteered.  It’s easy to miss if you don’t speak Korean, but I checked the footage again, and yes, he volunteered to be on the vocal team.  The third member rounding out Team Monster is Wu Hao.  He gave a great assessment in the first episode.  Let’s see how he does here.

Team Monster:  Wu Hao, Jo Min Jae, and Haru

Speaking of Haru, he’s full of his usual swagger, telling the judges his team is better than the other vocal teams.  (To be fair, he was asked.  It’s like they’re setting him up.)  But when the judges ask how the teamwork was on Team Monster, the swagger disappears.  We learn that South Korean Jo Min Jae had a bit of a language barrier with his teammates, who are Japanese (Haru) and Chinese (Wu Hao).  I know the intro to a flashback when I see one!

We flash back to the team’s second meeting with the vocal coaches, and we see the conflict from before, where Jo Min Jae has changed the key, making the song easier for himself but harder for teammate Wu Hao.  The coaches suggest changing the key again.  Jo Min Jae is not happy about this.  He continues to not be happy about it when they go back to rehearsals.

Our Six Singers trainee is not comfortable with the new key.  I think he still sounds amazing, but I’m not a trained vocalist and can’t hear the problems he’s having.  His teammates can’t hear them either, but he worries that they literally don’t understand his concerns because of the language barrier.  Their conversations start getting tense, mostly between Jo Min Jae and Wu Hao.  I still don’t know what Haru is doing here.

We do get a conversation with Jo Min Jae and Haru later, where Haru acknowledges their communication problems.  According to Haru, he and Wu Hao aren’t very good at Korean, and I wish I understood the language at least well enough to hear how they sound speaking it.  But the trio does get back together and make peace.  After that, the vibe picks up, and they get more and more excited about the final performance. 

Flashback over.  Showtime.

HOLY.  SHIT.

I need a cigarette after that.  Give me a second to pull myself together.

Okay.

One of the biggest problems I see on survival reality shows is trainees trying to act sexy onstage, and it comes across as not at all sexy, because trying to to act sexy isn’t sexy.  Confidence is sexy.  And these three guys on Team Monster are confident as hell. 

This is the most hard rock, aggressive, raging hot performance I’ve seen on any of these shows.  Even Haru earned his vocal place up there with his softer, lower sound backing up the rock opera vocals of his teammates.  I honestly didn’t know Jo Min Jae was capable of being this raw.  Just debut the three of them as a hard rock act and be done with it.

The judges are impressed and say that Haru really stood out, especially when they didn’t expect him to stand out at all.  I agree 100%, and I’m wondering if I should keep voting for Kaira if he can’t at least match this level of stage presence. 

The drawback, the judges say, is that Jo Min Jae didn’t stand out as much with such strong teammates.  I disagree, but I’ll admit that I’m biased.  (Vote for Jo Min Jae at newkids.co.kr.)

Next up, Team Magnetic.  This is Yellow Team Survivor Jang Kyu Hyun, 16 year-old Jeong Se Min, and the first trainee we met Lee Jun Seo, or the Timothée Chalamet of the group.  (If Lee Jun Seo ever reads these recaps, he’s probably going to regret ever saying that on camera.)

Team Magnetic:  Jang Kyu Hyun, Lee Jun Seo, and Jeong Se Min

We get our flashback.  We have some tension because Jang Kyu Hyun feels like he’s doing all the work, including mixing the song and adding a rap part.  He accuses his teammates of wishing they’d picked a different team.  We even see a clip of Lee Jun Seo singing another team’s song during a break.  Why did he even volunteer for this team?

Their midpoint eval is a complete disaster, with cracked voices and awkward raps.  It’s embarrassing.  This team is in serious trouble, even for a flashback.  “If this were a show, I’d ask for a refund,” Choi Young Jun tells them.  Oof. 

We jump right from there to the D-Day performance.  I’m a little worried about this, but let’s go.

The harmonies are beautiful and sweet, but then Lee Jun Seo’s voice cracks.  He recovers quickly, but this group just doesn’t have the chemistry.  They seem awkward together, even though the vocals are nearly perfect, minus the voice cracking.

The judges are harsher, saying it was disappointing.  Jang Kyu Hyun gets praise for the rap part he wrote and performed, but overall, it was just meh.  (I’m paraphrasing.)

The team leaves the stage, and once outside, Lee Jun Seo apologizes to the others.  This is incredibly sad.  These three just couldn’t work together very well, and Lee Jun Seo pushed himself too hard.

Now Team You Were Beautiful takes the stage.  Earlier this week, somone on Reddit posted that they were tired of seeing so many Day6 songs on these survival shows, and I wrote back that they may be right, but I’m biased and don’t care because I love Day6.  (Reddit:  Your source for mature, well-reasoned discourse.)

This team has Starship Trainee Legend Kim Ji Yong, as well as Open Audition contestants Chu Yoo Chan, Kim Yun Seo, and Lee Tae Geon.  Wow.  We have a nearly six-year Starship Legend paired with three newbies.  This team is really nervous.

Team You Were Beautiful:  Kim Ji Yong, Chu Yoo Chan, Lee Tae Geon, and Kim Yun Seo

We flash back to rehearsals.  This song has a lot of high notes.  Kim Yun Seo is STRUGGLING with these notes, his voice veering wildly off-key with every attempt.  He’s the leader of this group and worries that he’s picked teammates who will outshine him, but it sounds like the problem is that they got a really difficult song.  (Day6 makes it sound easy, though.  God, I love them.)

Trainee Legend Kim Ji Yong is extremely stessed right now.  I’m right there with him, because it’s time for the midpoint eval, and I’m already on the maximum dose of Tylenol after listening to Kim Yun Seo sruggle to sing for the past few minutes.  I really would have liked to be a fly on the wall for those open auditions.  How bad were the ones who got rejected?

Kim Ji Yong sings first and sings beautifully.  He had better make it to the final group.  Kim Yun Seo goes next, and God bless that poor boy, but he sounds like an old trumpet fished out of the river.  The other two sound pretty good, but none of them can measure up to Kim Ji Yong.

Yu Yeon Jung’s reaction to Kim Yun Seo’s singing

Vocal Coach Yu Yeon Jung has the world’s kindest heart.  She tries so hard to be encouraging with these trainees, but Kim Yun Seo is a new challenge.  She says his name and then struggles to find the words.  She finally says that he’s a rapper, which I didn’t know, and that his vocals just aren’t working.  “It doesn’t suit you,” she manages.  I may not be a K-pop girl group fan, but I have nothing but love for this woman.

She tells our poor boy to stick to doing a solid rap line.  I don’t know what he’ll be doing for the rest of the song, but as long has it’s not singing, I don’t care.  He writes the rap and performs it for the others, and they like it, which I find reassuring.  I really don’t want the guy to embarrass himself.

After more rehearsal, we get a funny moment where Kim Ji Yong says to him, “I’ve been stuck with you for four days, and I still don’t know you.”  Flashback is over.  Showtime.  I’m already cringing, and they haven’t even taken the stage yet.

Kim Ji Yong introduces the group, and even his speaking voice is melodic.  How has this boy not debuted yet?

Deeeeep breath.  Showtime.

It’s wonderful.  They all sound wonderful.  Stunningly so.  How could Kim Yun Seo sound so terrible in rehearsal and so good here?  The trainees backstage now can’t decide if this team or Team Monster should win best overall in Vocal.

But then, suddenly, we cut to this team backstage after the performance, and Trainee Legend Kim Ji Yong is SOBBING and apologizing to his teammates.  He literally falls to his knees in tears.  What the hell just happened?

We flash back to the performance.  Turns out he made a mistake with the lyrics, which I didn’t catch because they’re in Korean.  His mind went blank during the song, and he just slurred some random words, recovered quickly, and kept going.  Other than that, his performance was flawless. 

But Judge K.Will cannot get over it.  He calls Kim Ji Yong out on it immediately and tells him if he can’t overcome that mistake, he can’t go any further on this show.

What?  Are you kidding me?  It was one tiny mistake!  Seasoned K-pop groups make worse mistakes all the time!

Thankfully, the other judges are quick to tell Kim Ji Yong he did well.  But K.Will has gone right back into No Mercy mode, telling him that expectations were high for him, adding, “It’s like saying ‘too bad’ for getting 99 when you always get 100.”  He is downright scolding Kim Ji Yong.  I have seen K.Will be savage before, but this borders on delusionally abusive.

The judges praise Kim Yun Seo for his improvement, which I’m sure stings Kim Ji Yong even more.  No wonder he has a total meltdown. 

And with that jarring assessment, the First Plan of Strength has ended, and it’s time to find out our Top 7.

The board members and judges gather in the campus meeting room. (I can’t say it enough – this campus is amazing.)  As they review the performances, I’m glad that they’re looking for the standouts, even in the weaker performances.  My pick Kaira gets credit for his expression.  Even Lee Jun Seo, whose voice cracked, is recognized for his potential – by K.Will, who tore Kim Ji Yong to shreds over a minor mistake earlier.  Who even is this guy?

As they consider their choices for Top 7, the Monsta X song “Rush Hour” plays on the soundtrack.  I can’t wait until Minhyuk gets here.

Time to announce the results.  A podium with seven empty spots stands in the middle of the stage.  Our Star Announcer reappears on the screen.  (I miss the demon face from the first episode.)  We’re starting with the vocal positions.  First up, Team Monster.

Third place is Haru.  Oh, poor kid.  He should have been on the dance team.

Second place is Jo Min Jae.  Oh my God.  He didn’t come in first.  So our first place winner is … Wu Hao.  You know, I can’t even argue with this.  He and Jo Min Jae are both powerful singers.  Wu Hao deserves that spot.

Wu Hao and Jo Min Jae

Wu Hao makes his way to the podium, and I feel for the bitterly disappointed Jo Min Jae, but I do get this decision.

Now for Team Magnetic.

Third place is Lee Jun Seo.  That cracked note ended his chances to be on that podium.  What stings even worse is that he had the main vocal position for this performance.

Second place is 16 year-old Jeong Se Min.  Which means first place is Jang Kyu Hyun, who earned praise for his rapping.  It got him to the podium.

Jang Kyu Hyun

Now for Team You Were Beautiful, a song Kim Ji Yong may never be able to listen to again.

Fourth place is Lee Tae Geon.  He didn’t really stand out, so I get it.

Third place is Kim Yun Seo.  Wow.  The fact that he didn’t come in last shows how much he improved.  After the rehearsal footage, I figured he’d be one of those survival show trainees who mysteriously vanish and no one explains why.

Second place is Kim Ji Yong.  Wow.  That missed lyric cost him the top spot and a place on the podium.  K.Will is MEAN.  And that means that first place is Chu Yoo Chan, who looks stunned. He clearly wasn’t expecting to beat the Starship Legend Trainee.  When he takes his spot on the podium, he makes sure to praise Kim Ji Yong.

Chu Yoo Chan

Now for Dance Team AGK.  There are six spots on this team.

Sixth place is Jeon Jun Seo.  This kid just isn’t standing out.  I don’t see him making it to the end.  I checked the online interim voting results, and he’s dead last at 21.  Yeah, he’s on his way out.

Fifth place is Park Jun Hwan.  The one whose parents wouldn’t let him be a baseball player but agreed to this.  I hope they’re at least voting for him online, where he currently ranks at 11.

Fourth place is Seok June.  The one who practiced so hard, he gave himself nosebleeds.  He can take some consolation in the fact that in the online voting, he ranks third.

Third place is Lee Woo Ju.  Our 14 year-old babyfaced trainee ranks 15th in the online voting.  I just don’t think it’s his time yet.  I took him off my voting list after the last episode.

Second place is Jang Yong Hoon, just edged out of the first place spot by Park Won Bin.  Between this kid’s talent and his positive attitude, I think he’ll make it to the final group.  The online fans have put him in 4th place so far.  He’s our second longest Starship trainee, and I really want to see him win.  He went from an unchosen team to standing among the Top 7.

Park Won Bin

Now for Dance Team DWN.  Come on, Kaira …

Fifth place is Jin Bo Min.  I don’t see this guy making it to the end, either, although he’s currently 9th in the online rankings.

Fourth place is Baek Jun Hyuk.  He’s 12th in the online voting and just not standing out.

Third place is Park Seung Hyeon, 17th online.

Now it’s between Kaira and Kim Min Jae. 

Second place is Kim Min Jae, and that puts Kaira on the podium!  For now, not only is he winning in his rivalry with Haru, he’s also 10th in the online voting and has a lot of potential.  I don’t think he’s ready for the final group just yet, but I want to see him improve over the course of the series and get there in the end.

Kaira

Two spots left on the podium.  They are:

Kim Ji Yong.  Because Team You Were Beautiful wins as the top vocal team, and he was the second place winner, he’s on the podium.  He breaks down in tears again as he thanks his team.

Jang Yong Hoon.  Dance Team New AGK wins overall, so he gets the 7th spot.

We now have our Top 7, and I can’t wait to see how the online voting changes after this.  Five of my picks are on the podium.  The First Plan, Strength, has officially come to an end.  We’re shown the overall dance and vocal rankings, but they’re in Korean.  Again, if you can read Korean and are reading this, feel free to drop a translation in the comments.

Moving on!  We cut to the next day, when everyone gathers to learn about the Second Plan.  Our Top 7 gets their own podium and special uniforms.  The Starnouncer greets them and reminds them that the Top 7 got a concept photo shoot.  The pictures are shown on the giant screens, and they look stunning.  Of course, Kaira gets the Center Visual position.

Now to reveal the Second Plan.  In the First Plan, the trainees showcased their strengths.  So for Plan 2, they will work on their weaknesses.  We’ll have two vocal and two dance teams.  Now to find out what songs they will be doing.

Another discussion on Reddit this week concerned the songs of Plan 1.  Most survival shows promote the artists of the label.  On YG Treasure Box,  for example, we got songs by YG artists BigBang, BlackPink, and iKON.  But on this show, our Plan 1 songs came from everywhere except Starship, and none of the Redditors I saw could figure out why.

So for Plan 2, our vocal songs are:

“Shine With Me,” by IVE.  Okay, this is a Starship girl group.  This makes sense.

“Girls” by aespa.  This is an SM Entertainment girl group.  While I’m not as familiar with girl groups, I do know that Winter from aespa has worked with Bang Yedam, formerly of Treasure.

As before, the dance songs are two new tracks written for the show.  They are “So G.oo.D” (which will be a pain in the ass to type) and “I’m OK, You’re OK,” which I’ll just refer to as the OK Song because these recaps are long enough already.

The two dance group leaders will be Park Won Bin and Kaira.  For vocals, it’s Chu Yoo Chan and Wu Hao.  Since this is a weakness mission, I’d expect them to switch, having the dancers be on vocal teams and vice versa.  But no.  And are we going to play a kids game to choose which team gets which song?  You bet your aespa we are!  I’m hitting fast forward.

When the dust settles, Wu Hao chooses the So Good song, and Chu Yoo Chan chooses the OK song.  For vocals, Kaira takes “Shine With Me,” and Park Won Bin gets Girls.  The song “Girls.”  This song title is going to make things weird, isn’t it?

The leaders choose their teams, and again, they’re choosing the strongest members for their teams, so I still don’t see how this is a Weakness mission.  It looks just like the first mission.  The Starnouncer does tell the trainees to use this mission to work on their weaknesses, but I’m skeptical. 

Now we cut to rehearsals, and I’m hoping we get at least one performance before the episode ends.  We start with Dance Team OK, who chooses Haru as their main dancer.  Cut to the next day, when they have an assessment with Choi Young Jun.  He’s impressed and works with them to add more spirit and energy to the moves.  We’re getting to watch the master at work, writing choreo, and it’s pretty cool to watch.

Choi Young Jun writing choreo with Team OK

This team has great chemistry and has fun during their rehearsals.  But these survival shows never let us be happy for too long.  The screen suddenly goes dark, and we hear sobbing.  Oh no.  What’s happened now?  Did K.Will barge in and criticise a dancer for sneezing?

The lights go back up on Haru in a confessional, and he’s the one in tears.  He says he doesn’t think he can win, and he’s lost all hope.  Again, what the hell happened?

We don’t get to find out.  Instead, we cut to Dance Team So Good and their rehearsal.  They choose Lee Tae Geon as their Lead Dancer.  He’s thrilled.  I’m too nervous at this point to be happy for him.  I’m worried we’ll suddenly cut to black and hear the sound of his teammates begging him not to jump off the roof.

Things are going well until Lee Tae Geon and Kim Ji Yong start fighting over the choreo.  It devolves until the rest of the team is rehearsing while Lee Tae Geon sits in a corner and sulks.  During their assessment, they show Kim In Kyu both sets of choreo – one written by Lee Tae Geon and the other by Kim Ji Yong.  Our expect chooses Kim Ji Yong’s choreo, and our Lead Dancer is crushed.

Later, when the group goes back into rehearsal, they want to make Wu Hao the Lead Dancer instead.  Lee Tae Geon cries as he fights to keep the position and apologizes to his team, but he finally gives in. 

Okay, that was a LOT, but we still have a few minutes left, and suddenly, it’s D-Day.  I’m guessing this series is sponsored by Pepsi, from the way they make sure to drink it and place it on set with the unblurred labels facing the camera. 

We have ten minutes left.  We should be able to see one performance.  The trainees all stand together onstage, looking terrified.  The judges comment on how scared they look and applaud to ease the tension in the room.  It doesn’t seem to work.

Both dance teams come forward, and I’m hoping to see at least one of them dance, but no, we’re yanked into a flashback.  At first I’m really frustrated and feel like this show is just trying to run out the clock.  But no.  If only.

We see both dance teams rehearsing, and suddenly a screen on the wall flickers to life. Our Starnouncer appears.  We have a new development.

Everyone gathers in the main dome.  The Starnouncer tells them that the Board has been informed about all the chaos and conflict in the dance team rehearsals so far and has decided to take action.  There’s going to be a member trade for both teams.  This is to help make them STRONGER for this WEAKNESS challenge.

Okay, wait.  Yes, the conflicts here are causing a weakness.  But when K-pop idol groups have conflict, they have to resolve it.  They don’t just get to trade members with another group.  Why aren’t these trainees being forced to face these weaknesses?  I thought that’s what Plan 2 was all about.

The Starnouncer tries to justify this by sayiing that trading team members will help them overcome their current weaknesses.  No.  Idol groups get stronger by dealing with the conflicts in their groups and finding solutions.  This is not a Weakness Mission.  This is an Avoidance and Denial Mission.

I hate this.  Let’s take BTS as an example of why I hate this.  During the BTS Wings Tour of 2017, Jin and V had a serious argument over choreography that wound up airing on their Burn The Stage documentary.  The argument got REALLY heated.  Did BTS trade Jin to TXT?  No!  Because TXT wasn’t a group yet!  They worked it out and became stronger as a group!  And I’m sure everything was fine until Jin probably did some other dumbass thing!  (I’m sorry, Jin’s never been my favorite.)

Anyway, Kim Ji Yong and Chu Yoo Chan meet to discuss the teammate trades.

Chu Yoo chan goes straight for the Team Leader, saying he wants Kim Ji Yong himself to join his group, even though it means sacrificing someone from his own team.  Because this is all kinds of professional.  Have I mentioned I hate this?

But Kim Ji Yong refuses.  I’m guessing he also watched Burn The Stage.  The trade falls through.  But when we go back to D-Day, the judges ask about the attempted trade, and Chu Yoo Chan’s team is reminded that he was willing to give one of them the boot, and now I just hope that their whole team loses.  That’s how annoyed I am right now.  The trade wasn’t even successful, and I’m still mad because THIS IS NOT A WEAKNESS MISSION.

I’m also mad because the episode ends here, which means we don’t get to see a performance, making that whole team trade thing a complete waste of time.

Anyway, I’m keeping all my previous votes the same, except I’m dropping Lee Jun Seo and voting for Wu Hao, and now I’m stomping off to bed.

I can’t believe this is the same Starship that gave us No Mercy.  See you next episode, unless I have an argument with my sister and am too busy trading her to another family.

[catch-me-hello]

Do you watch the videos they post of the trainees between episodes? NewKids post something everyday and it's almost difficult to keep up with.

There are just too many of those videos. I've never seen a show with so much B-roll and extra footage. For now, I'm just recapping the actual episodes. Are you watching the extra videos? Does anything stand out?