chamberkat

[chamberkat]

[chamberkat]

[chamberkat]

„It’s just a simple ice cream, and George hasn’t had the company of anybody but his kid and his two only friends in a while. And Lando is not that bad when he’s not talking about letting kids cover themselves in very probably non-edible paints and other art crafts.“

Did some art inspired by Sweet Talk written by the wonderful @beabnormal24

Go check it out! It was such a fun read!

[chamberkat]

[chamberkat]

some wimblennik in preparation for next month!! 🦊🍓

[chamberkat]

[chamberkat]

that one Blade Runner scene but make it angsty Landoscar

[chamberkat]

loved this one sm!

With the amazing art from my amazing friend @arinabay (ily 🫶🏻)

Sweet Talk ~ Lando Norris/George Russell, 25.3k, E

He watches the bubble of a chat appear just two minutes after. The guy right-swiped him too, which is freaking amazing, and George notices that the guy’s profile picture is actually of his face, giggling to himself for being so impatient to not even check his face before- The glass of wine almost spills. Having to deal with a toddler of his own does help with reflexes, though, which means that George catches it before it can reach the carpet. “Fuck, fuck-“ Unfortunately, it does not mean that it can erase the image off his mind, LN4- Lando’s big face covering the screen, green eyes staring into the camera like he was fucking made for it. That body belonged to him, apparently, and those arms and those moles. Which means that George was thirtsting on Lando, in fact. Lando as in his son’s teacher, the guy who almost made him scream the other day. -- George, Lando and unexpected tropes

Read my new norrussell fic on my ao3

[chamberkat]

Did anyone asked for swapped roles for Jannik and Oscar? No? Just me? Anyways. Here’s Jannik as a driver and Oscar as a Tennis player!!

[chamberkat]

[chamberkat]

they’re unhinged your honor

[chamberkat]

what if our fate has already been written by the stars and we’re doomed to repeat this over and over again (I wouldn’t change a thing)

[chamberkat]

"sorry"

[chamberkat]

1.5K carcar zookeeper AU. i talked about this idea with @brushedbymelancholy way back when carbono hung out with that snake in Australia and it's finally escaped the drafts :)

The thing they don’t tell you about being a zoo veterinarian is, yeah, you get to save lives and care for dozens of beautiful exotic animals from around the world, but you also get priority access to all the best zoo-wide gossip. Working across all departments means that you’re privy to the personal woes of every zookeeper. It’s one of the unexpected perks of the job, Alex thinks. 

No more is that true than today, when Alex is grabbing a vending machine snack in the breakroom before a scheduled snow leopard checkup. He’s about to bite into his overpriced Milky Way when he’s cornered by the small mammal keeper, Carlos. 

“Alex- you talk to the reptile guys, right?” he asks, fiddling with his hands. “You work with their head, uh, wrangler?”

"Who, Oscar?" Alex asks. It’s fun when the gossip comes right to him. He usually has to pry at least a little.

"Yes! Yes, him. You, like, give his snakes and lizards their medicine and deliver their babies, yes?" Carlos asks, hopeful.

“Snakes don’t give birth, mate. Come on, you work at a zoo." Alex says, taking a bite of his Milky Way. "Wait, why?”

Carlos blinks. "Just- um. Wondering if you knew anything about him."

"Uh, I know that his African rock python has been shedding its skin an abnormal amount for its age and size?"

Carlos shudders. “No- no, not about his… no. I meant… Has he said he is bringing anyone to the Earth Day thing?”

Every year, the zoo throws a conservation-focused fundraiser and gala for the foundation’s big donors and sponsors. The senior keepers all get tickets and plus-ones too; it’s the one thing people get excited about around here that isn’t animals.

“Uh… Not a clue, mate,” Alex says. He’s a little disappointed. This isn’t so much gossip as it is Carlos asking for love advice. “I have a way you could find out, though!”

“Really?” Carlos’ eyes get wide.

“Yeah. Go over to the reptile house and ask him.”

Carlos goes pale. “Uh, no. I cannot. There’s really no need for that, actually. Just… Could you ask? For me?”

And here come the puppy-dog eyes. Heinous. Alex takes another bite of his Milky Way and shakes his head.

...

Let the record show that Alex isn't anyone's errand boy, so he really wasn't planning on talking to Oscar today. Carlos is an adult and can put on his big boy pants and ask. But then Alex got an emergency call to the reptile house. 

Bert, the zoo’s blue-tongued skink, inexplicably had its tongue turn red. You just can’t have a red-tongued blue-tongued skink, so this case had skyrocketed to the top of his priorities list. Alex was assigned to take some blood samples for the lab, and it just so happens that Oscar’s the reptile wrangler on call for questioning. 

After the basic “Has Bert been eating/sleeping/behaving erratically" questions out of the way, Alex takes the little guy’s blood and decides he’ll help Carlos out a bit. He’s feeling charitable.

“So,” Alex starts, putting down the syringe, “I was in the break room earlier talking to Carlos, the small mammal guy, and-”

“Ugh, he’s kind of a jackass, isn’t he?” Oscar says, gingerly picking up Bert. The scaly guy nuzzles into his arms and quickly makes himself comfortable. It would be quite cute, if Bert were a cat and not something so scaly and slick. Alex loves helping all zoo animals, but he’d be lying if he didn’t still have his preferences. 

“Oh, is he?” Alex asks, trying to sound nonchalant as he scrawls down some notes. “Not to me. Or to the meerkats I was helping him out with earlier. What’s the tea?”

Oscar absently scratches Bert behind the ears. Er, behind the space where his ears would be, if he had any. “He’s just… pretentious,” he grumbles. “I don’t know, it’s not like I care, but… I swear, he takes the long route to his station every morning just to avoid the reptile house.” 

Alex stops even pretending to write. “Oh yeah?”

Oscar’s on a roll. He wouldn’t be ranting this much if he didn’t care. “He thinks he’s better than everyone else here because he’s all… popular with the field trippers,” he scoffs, butting Bert back in his transport cage. “But the kids only visit his exhibits so often because he’s cute.”

“What?” Alex asks. “Why would the eight-year-olds care that he’s cute?”

Oscar blanches. “What?”

There it is.

“You said the only reason kids-”

“Because his animals are cute,” Oscar emphatically corrects.

Oh boy. This is good. Alex tries his best not to smile too wide. “You definitely said-”

Oscar goes as red as Bert’s tongue. “Animals! I said animals. He works with the small mammals, mate. They’re cute. Kids like cute animals.”

Alex decides to let him off easy for that one. It’s the least he can do after that embarrassing display. He’s not just a great vet and a great gossip-getter, he’s also a great friend.

…

And because Alex is such a great friend, he swings by the meerkat habitat on his way to his scheduled zebra maternity appointment. Luckily, Carlos is there, refilling water bowls and replacing enrichment toys.

“So,” Alex says, leaning over the railing, “I may have gotten some information about one Oscar the Reptile Wrangler.”

Carlos is in front of him in an instant. “What? What-uh, what did you hear? Did he, uh, do you think he would want to-”

“I think he’d be receptive to an invitation,” Alex says.

It’s very sweet, the way Carlos’ eyes light up. “Really? You think- Um, do you know which car is his in the parking lot? My shift is almost over, I could meet him there and then-”

“He’s working a reptile show in a half hour,” Alex says. “I think your best shot is to approach him then.”

Carlos goes a few shades paler. “Um. I-I think I will just try to catch him in the parking lot.”

“I really think you should approach him at the reptile show,” Alex says, a little more forcefully this time. “He loves what he does. I think he’d appreciate you meeting him there.”

Carlos clicks his mouth shut and nods. Alex can see him swallow. He gives him a, “Just consider it, mate!” over his shoulder before he high-tails it to his next appointment. 

…

Alex manages to wrap up his equine ultrasound just in time to check out the very end of the reptile show. Oscar’s got an African ball python on his shoulders, showing it off to a small group of kids oohing and ahhing and eeking as it curls around his arm.

Standing off to the side, Carlos has turned up. He’s changed out of his uniform, but he doesn’t look any less nervous than he did when Alex last saw him. Alex shoots him a reassuring smile and a thumbs up and takes an empty seat on the risers. He’s far enough away to not intrude, but close enough that he can still hear their conversation. 

The children eventually dissipate, and Carlos wobbles up to Oscar. “Hello, Oscar.”

Oscar blinks. His snake blinks, too. “Hello.”

Carlos speaks slowly. “You. Um. You are wearing a snake.”

“Hm? Oh, Ernie?” He moves his arm a little closer. Ernie ventures a bit into Carlos’ space. “You want to pet him?”

“No please,” Carlos says quickly, stiff as a board. “I mean… no, thank you.” 

Alex is technically off the clock, but this is better than anything on Netflix right now. He just wishes he had popcorn.

Carlos takes a sharp inhale. “I, er, IwaswonderingifyouhadadatetotheEarthDaygala.” He just stands there after, like he’s bracing himself for impact. Like Oscar's going to sic Ernie on him. Poor guy.

But Oscar just stares at him. Ernie stares, too. Alex has been staring this whole time. “I thought you hated me.” 

Carlos reacts to this like he’s just been told the sky is green. Or that meerkats live in above-ground nests instead of burrows. “What? Of course not! Why would you…”

Oscar shrugs. “I mean, I think we’ve talked like, once, in the breakroom. And you always take the long way to your exhibits to avoid the reptile house.”

“Oh,” Carlos says softly. “I, uh. That wasn’t because of you. Just. Erm...”

Oscar seems to get it, then. Alex covers his mouth with his hand. He’d figured it out ages ago. “You’re scared of snakes?”

Carlos shrugs sheepishly. “Your animals eat my animals for breakfast. Can you blame me for being intimidated?”

Oscar smiles. “Hold out your finger.”

Carlos goes another three shades pale, but does what he’s told. In turn, Oscar holds Ernie out. The snake sticks out his skinny, forked tongue and licks the tip of Carlos’ pointer finger. 

“See? He likes you,” Oscar says. “He’s giving you a little kiss.”

Alex decides not to clarify that a snake’s tongue is more like its nose. He suspects they both know that, anyway, but are a tad too busy staring at each other with goofy, blinding smiles.

That’s probably Alex’s cue to leave, then. He slides out of his seat and makes his way to the exit. He turns back before he reaches the turnstiles; the lovebirds are talking and laughing, and Ernie’s got his tail wrapped around Carlos’ fingers. Cute.

Alex needs to change his title. He’s not just an animal doctor, he’s a love doctor too. Hell yeah.

[chamberkat]

what if our fate has already been written by the stars and we’re doomed to repeat this over and over again (I wouldn’t change a thing)

[chamberkat]

SO NICE MERC DID IT TWICE

[chamberkat]

gax backshots... oh i'm sure