chaoticneutralnpc

[chaoticneutralnpc]

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[chaoticneutralnpc]

This is drifting away OP's point about bipolar and schizophrenia specifically, but I'd also like to add that the "unconstructive" behaviours are constructive, in the sense that they make you feel better.

People without any mental illnesses, who have a baseline of feeling neutral use them to cope with mildly distressing circumstances all the time. Sometimes even just to feel pleasure!

People with mental illnesses don't lose the need to cope with distressing circumstances. In fact, funnily enough, they often experience a LOT more of them. And, shockingly, occasionally they also just want to feel pleasure.

Contrary to popular belief, therapy (and often medication) do not make you instantly feel better. Recovery - aka learning to "cope healthily" - is NOT an easy, restful process either.

Just to make your baseline go from *literal hell* to *better, but still pretty bad* involves feeling like literal. fucking. hell. Day after day after bloody day while your healthy coping skills slowly grow. "Unhealthy" coping mechanisms are obviously unhealthy long-term, but goddamnit they get results in the short term. and frankly, anyone who could put in the work required to develop healthy coping mechanisms without ever needing a break was starting with a baseline of *kind of bad* at worst.

Now, I'm not bipolar, but I imagine it's especially fucking tough if you also can't even just uncritically enjoy the moments of pleasure that you do get.

So, if anything the standards should be MORE lax for people with mental illnesses. And DOUBLY so for conditions that require you to police your positive feelings as well as the negative ones.

you’d be surprised at how many doctors will tell you that schizophrenics shouldn’t masturbate, have sexual fantasies or write/draw erotica, let alone date or have actual sex, because it “distracts them from recovery”, as if schizophrenia is a two week course of antibiotics and not a lifelong neurotype and disability

[chaoticneutralnpc]

i get that americans love their cultural imperialism, but it really does piss me off that june is “international” pride month just because something happened in the united states.

in aotearoa, june isn’t our pride, it’s theirs. martha p johnson and sylvia rivera are their historical figures, not ours. the phrase that “you owe your rights to Black trans women” is true there, but here we owe our rights to (mostly) Māori historical figures. i have the freedoms i do because of the legacy of an entirely different set of people operating in an entirely different context at entirely different times.

But because of american cultural imperialism, most queer people in Aotearoa don’t even know our own queer history. Carmen Rupe, Ngahuia Te Awekotuku, the Dorian Society, Gillian Laundon, Georgina Beyer, and the Wolfenden Association are some of our queer history. We should know their names! we should know what they did for us! but because of the power of the american imperial machine, we don’t.

our national pride month should be july, the month that the Homosexual Law Reform Act passed in 1989. our two largest cities hold their pride festivals in february and march, respectively. american queer history has very little (or nothing, depending on who you ask) to do with our queer history. anecdotally, from my own queries, queer youth in aotearoa know more about american queer history than our own.

anyway, happy pride, americans. i’m truly sorry that most of you don’t see the negative impact your nation’s culture has on the rest of the world. and to the rest of the world reading this, try searching for your own country and culture’s queer history, don’t accept the american narratives as your own. we deserve our own histories divorced from the cultural hegemony of the USA.

[chaoticneutralnpc]

i want to talk about my ocs but im literally this image. i got nothing

[chaoticneutralnpc]

[chaoticneutralnpc]

"these researchers published a paper on something that literally any of us could have told you 🙄" ok well my supervisors wont let me write something in my thesis unless I can back it up with a citation so maybe it's a good thing that they're amplifying your voice to the scientific community in a way that prevents people from writing off your experiences as annecdotal evidence

[chaoticneutralnpc]

guy who waited 11 days to have his broken finger looked at so now they have to re-break it -> (imagine a photo of me here)

[chaoticneutralnpc]

Standing next to somebody reading a controversial book in a crowded bus, reading over their shoulder but shaking my head every time they shake their head, so people know that I disapprove of their vain and insecure need to verify that everyone can see that they are capable of engaging morally questionable literature critically.

[chaoticneutralnpc]

Being awful at recognising faces AND names means life is a neverending logic puzzle.

“Right, so someone here is a student graduating uni, becky was the one with the ponytail, mark doesn’t like anthony and two people like chocolate chip icecream and I think one of them had short brown hair…”

[chaoticneutralnpc]

So last month I got hit by a car and died right. Which I didn't initially realize until I watched some guy haul my body into his pickup and drive off. Which, being that it's deep in rural Michigan, I assume means my body will make some venison jerky and maybe some wall decoration, and I'll be resigned to being one of hundreds of deer ghosts floating around Saginaw, which is w/e. But then I find out the guy works at a taxidermy shop or something, and he's actually pretty good at stuffing and mounting deer carcasses, which I come to find out when I find myself face to face with my old body in the shop window. So naturally, I figure since ghosts need to possess something to interact with the living world and etc etc etc the most logical thing to do is to possess my own body, since it's basically a statue of myself. And a little surprisingly, it actually fits like a glove. Like, since it's my body, it feels like stepping right back into place. So I get out of town and back to my herd, eventually. And that's where the trouble starts coming into it, because after I get settled again, I don't know how to explain to everyone else what feels so weird. Like since I can move my body and do everything I used to do, it's functionally the same, like nothing happened. Or it SHOULD be, so I don't know how to explain how it's NOT. But it's just hard to explain it to someone who's never been hit by a truck I guess

[chaoticneutralnpc]

She’s everything

[chaoticneutralnpc]

I’m honestly surprised I’ve never seen SheZow mentioned anywhere online. Like, it was Gender Sterotypes the show and even as a *kid* I was thinking “man, these jokes are stupid”… but also, it was the first time I remember seeing “switching genders” as a story element.

What I’m saying is, I’d bet actual money there’s a non-zero amount of people who had an awakening watching it, and I’ve not even seen a single “in retrospect this show was extremely problematic” argument online, which is frankly disappointing.

[chaoticneutralnpc]

i really could write an essay on how shit is that we’ve completely abandoned the monster-of-the-week episode format even when rebooting shows that relied on it to replace them with grimdark edgy plotlines where nothing feels good or accomplished at the end of the day

[chaoticneutralnpc]

talking to preschoolers is awesome bc they have not fully differentiated stories into 'true stories' and 'imaginary stories' yet so you will tell them about something that happened you once (coyote came out of a bush right in front of you and got startled) and they will tell you about how one time their house was full of coyotes in every room 'including five in the garage' and they're not even like, aware i think of the idea that they are technically 'lying'. they are simply telling stories about coyotes bc its time to tell stories about coyotes.

[chaoticneutralnpc]

you may be losing the idgaf war but they wouldn't even let me enlist. on account of my poet's temperament.

[chaoticneutralnpc]

Genuinely insane how much me deciding to half-ass creating a sensory friendly space by spending $30 on 2 target lamps and using those instead of the overhead fluorescents improved my life this year. Big light off forever

[chaoticneutralnpc]

the secret to organising any kind of trip with your friends is to become the benevolent dictator. do NOT wait for everyone to provide a consensus on things before you book anything. do it and then ask for feedback after. do not ask people what they would like to do just tell them what is happening and let them all nod along like the sheep they are. this is the ONLY way to coordinate a group of adults in their 20s/30s