charleemoon

[charleemoon]

i actually never stop thinking about this fucking scene. why does he exhale like that. why does he MOAN when he lets himself point the gun. no stop. because then you see hannibal fucking COWER. like this man who sees near no one as a threat to him. he SHUDDERS like a FUCKING DOG at the barrel. and then will moves CLOSER?? and he COWERS WITH HIS TAIL BETWEEN HIS LEGS. he basically bites his goddamn lip at it. the spirit of the gun blowjob flows through them or what

I don't have the experience I mean but I don't think moving sensually with lips apart and batting eyelashes is a part of pointing a gun at someone?????

[charleemoon]

Anon #1: Will and Hannibal are not in love

Y'all: boooo

Anon #2: Will's ass is average

Y'all: HOW DARE YOU

[charleemoon]

anybody else . can anyone hear me

[charleemoon]

artfight!!! COME GET ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[charleemoon]

How I’m feeling right now

In the middle of artfight crunch and a semi reboot to the main blog! Look out ahead yall 👀👀

[charleemoon]

i get mean when im nervous, like a bad dog

[charleemoon]

two characters: flirty banter, clearly getting off on the power dynamics between them

people who are scared of going to hell for masturbating: he loves him like a son

me, hauving covid: can he call him that while they fuck

[charleemoon]

Idk if you're still doing unpopular opinions, but here's mine:

Will does NOT have a fat ass.

I'm sorry, but IT IS NONEXISTENT. HE IS NOT AS CAKED UP AS PEOPLE MAKE HIM OUT TO BE. THAT IS A NORMAL, AVERAGE ASS. NOTHING MORE.

That is all. Thank you.

(I can't believe THIS is my unpopular opinion LMAOOO)

Yes I am still doing unpopular opinions, I have a few more in my asks and yes, this is an unpopular opinion indeed

Sir this is not the average ass.

[charleemoon]

posting in the groupchat when you’re the only one who’s PST and it’s after everyone else’s bedtime

[charleemoon]

KYLE GALLNER & JOHNNY BERCHTOLD as Benson & Bradley in The Passenger (2023)

[charleemoon]

okay so when benson tells randy he's been watching him, acknowledges the fact out loud that randy is seen, it's a connection and simultaneous projection of bensons own wants and needs. from all we are shown it's easy to assume benson lacked the support a child desperately needs when processing a traumatic event, especially that of abuse. whether he ever spoke up about it or not it's clear nothing was ever done. there's only so much guessing as to whether or not the abuse benson suffered lead to any behavioral changes in his home or school life, but again, regardless of if there were any "signs" the adults in his life could've caught, they were either missed or ignored.

so benson grows up and up in a sort of isolated suffering, continuing on living when he's got all this hurt and confusion and no one to explain it to him, no one to tell him how to be okay. it both warps and cements his beliefs that if nobody comes to help you, you have to do it all alone. this thinking likely keeps him from being able to process and move past his trauma. if you're like me, bensons portrayal is deeply personal, deeply relatable, and even if it isn't, there's humanity to be seen in bensons character (shout out 2 u kyle 🗣️)

this is what benson sees in randy. when you've lived it, the signs are easier to recognize, and maybe benson saw the way randy was wasting away between coworkers and customers alike, and over time began to see something familiar. not a mirror, but a reflection. when he listens to randy's story about ms beard outside the mall, though he laughs at first, he still reaches out to connect to and comfort randy by wiping his tears. benson also telling randy he was only a kid and that he can't blame himself for what happened is just another way he projects his needs onto randy. thisss is whyy i feel bensons verbal acknowledgment of his observing of randy is so pertinent to his character.

it's likely that no one ever told benson that they saw him, no one ever watched benson struggle through life and thought to themself that he needed guidance and change so that the weight of his world wouldn't fall so heavy on his shoulders anymore. in his own very crude and very violent way, benson attempts to give randy what he always lacked, someone giving a shit enough to step up and intervene.

[charleemoon]

“Strangers,” Ethel Cain // Benson and Randy, The Passenger (2023)

i never blamed you for loving me the way that you did while you were torn apart—i would still wait with you there.

[charleemoon]

THE PASSENGER 2023 ― dir. Carter Smith

[charleemoon]

sorry for the question what's a fp

uhhh oh boyyyy

i suggest you do your own research if you are genuinely interested but just uh. basic rundown an fp is a favorite person, which is an intense attachment that can be formed with a person with bpd. the pwbpd is deeply and wholly dependent on this person for validation, attention, support, reassurance, etc. this can be formed with anyone. a family member, a partner, a friend, a mentor, a stranger. in my experience, it is usually a person provides a certain kind of comfort or reassurance that the pwbpd has been seeking their whole life at the right time and suddenly, this obsessive attachment is formed. your life starts to revolve around them. you spend every waking moment thinking of them, you're more sensitive to their rejection than any other person. it begins this cycle of severe dependency that can and often does harm both people involved. you can't imagine living without them, you genuinely feel like you might actually die if you were to lose them.

every person's experience is different. some pwbpd never have fps, some only ever have one, some have multiple at once, or always have one no matter what. oftentimes, i feel like it is usually the pwbpd forming an attachment to someone to fills a "hole" in their life, taking the role that a caretaker or loved one failed to fill at a crucial stage. with my fps, i've had a recurring pattern of forming severe, obsession attachments to males that are in positions of power to me, either through an age gap or mentor role. they provide basic human validation and kindness that i was missing from my own male role models at low points of my life, that i become severely attached to and dependent on. due to my lack of general love and kindness growing up, bare minimum exemplars of said things make me spiral out of control, because they feel so huge and meaningful. it's hard to have perspective and not become obsessive about it, because my worldview is so fucked from the way i was raised

othertimes though, it happens with other men near my age, who express a desire for closeness and intimacy that i become very attached to. incredibly fast-moving, intense, sometimes inappropriate friendships, with unclear boundaries and frightening behavior. bpd revolves around a life consuming fear of abandonment and rejection, so being shown kindness or connection early on can spur on this obsessive intensity, where you become so desperate to keep something good that you try to force people into staying, try to get as close to people as humanely possible as fast you can. while constantly lashing out and losing your mind at the feeling of it ending, even when it's not. it's often self fulfilling: you become so obsessed with the idea of maintaining a good thing that you end up destroying it with trying to keep it perfect, keep yourself perfect

it's often random, and unpredictable. i've noticed for me, at least, an fp forms after a great loss or rejection in my life. i feel unloved, and lost. and i cling to someone who shows me what i believe to be unimaginable kindness. a compliment, a kind word. a show of comfort or love. a joke about hanging out, anything. it sets off this wire spark and all of a sudden: i need you. i NEED you, and i can't imagine life without you. i need your comfort, your time, your validation. i need to be the most important thing in your life, i need you to need me. it's a clawing desperation, it's consuming.

and it's very unhealthy! these relationships are extremely difficult to maintain without extremely clear, concise, fair boundaries. which many people don't want to set. and sometimes, you often don't want to respect. they feel rejecting, hurtful. splitting [black/white thinking] make it hard to keep a clear mind about someone, one day they're all you are, all you want and all you have, and the next you are enraged beyond belief with them, for hurting you, betraying you, leaving you. even when they haven't done anything at all

im currently in the process of trying to heal from this pattern of behavior, as often times this devotion has either led to me being mistreated by others, or mistreating them. i'm not entirely sure why it happens, or why the connection seems near impossible to sever. despite having no contact with any of my fps for the sake of both of us, i am still deeply attached in some ways. still trying to pull myself away from that current downward. it's a process

might be oversharing, but you asked! and so i hope this satisfies some of that. again, if you are curious on a more objective understanding of it, i'd suggest just a quick search. im still trying to get diagnosed, and still growing and understanding myself and my place in my behaviors and patterns. but yeah

[charleemoon]

I was gnna ask colors 2 yayay Good to know ur fav colors I'm rubbing my paws together evily do u have a favorite animal for no specific reason btw 😊😊

OH GOSSSHSHHH ummm well my favorite animal is monkeys!!! but i kind of. dont like them. like in real life. i love cartoon monkey and stuffed animal monkey and cute monkey. but real monkey... oh... i also like PUPPY :(((

[charleemoon]

NEEERD NEEERD this guy likes Berdly point and laugh

YEAH LAUUUUGH IT UP GO AHEAD. DO IT MORE. I ACTUALLY LOVE IT. HUMILATE ME ANON. DO IT.

[charleemoon]

do u think will really loved molly??? i think there gotta be some part of him that had a fondness for her (i even think that part of him favoured her over hannibal but i appreciate that my truth may not be everyone else’s truth😭🙏)

i think you could say will loved molly if you think will loved abigail.

he didn't. but he believed he did. more importantly, he wanted to. he loved them for what they stood for, for what they could be to him, for what they could mean about him. he loved molly selfishly, and expendably. he held a fondness for her, because she was perfect for what he wanted to make her into. a good wife, for a good husband. a world where he could be her sweet man, kind and unscarred. she was a walking ideal, a molded lie, with sun-kissed blonde hair and a smile with no crooked teeth

i believe the mask will projected as the man he pretended to be favored molly over hannibal. the cling to normalcy, an appeal to traditional goodness, and the endless guilt that festered in his heart. she was perfect, what he should want. everything he should be. it's why it hurt so much to not want her. it's why it was so easy to come home to hannibal. the man he created that held fondness for molly died when he accepted himself. shed his skin, and allowed himself truth

because will had known for a long time that he was long past a normal life, he was more darkness than goodness, more truth than lie. molly was a last fleeting attempt to try and convince himself he was anything other than himself. he was always, always going to go back to hannibal.

i believe they are equally guilty of using each other. their marriage, inherently, was a sham. two people in grief, running to someone they didn't truly know, and most likely never bothered to. molly must've known who will was, the things he had done. will knew he picked her because she would survive hannibal, she could survive what he knew he was going to do to her. they let themselves enthrall in a fantasy, doomed to fail

i don't believe he loved her, and i don't believe he ever tried to. he respected her, he chose her. to survive the brunt of their hurricane. another piece in the game. another vessel of will's projected goodness, his bargaining with god to prove himself a good man while growing ever closer to the eye of the storm. to hannibal, and the nature of their love. not good or evil. it is natural, and it destroys