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Bruh why you wasting those people time

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distressing things to say to your friends

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my grandma was a quilter and she said that there were a couple rules about making art which sounded …suspicious lol

but these were her rules:

whenever you can, take a class.

whenever you can, make art with other people. not collaborating necessarily, just spending time together making art

and that was it.

she was a very practiced and talented quilter, and she took classes and went to quilt groups often

she taught both me and my mom to sew (despite her being my paternal grandma) and my mom is also a talented quilter

I can’t count the amount of times I’ve learned something new when sharing the studio with someone (plus it’s a good way to spend time with friends)

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WITH THE STRENGTH OF TEN CRACKHEADS I PROMISE ILL KILL YOU

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Here is a skill that many of us are going to need for survival: how to tell if someone is offering to let you lie.

The tip-off phrase is "If [circumstance] was true, then we/I could do [helpful thing.]" This is not a guarantee that the person is offering, but it should tell you "I am being informed of a way to improve things."

Your confirmation phrase is "What documentation would that require?" This is essentially asking them "if people come asking me to prove this, will I be able to? Or will they not come at all?"

The answer you are hoping for with the confirmation phrase is "Just tell me if it's true, and I'll put it on the form." Note that this is not a direct instruction to lie, because they can't tell you that.

If they didn't mean to extend an offer to lie or this is a situation where they can't, then they'll list off something like your paystubs or your birth certificate. Your response back in that case is "Thanks, I'll tell my friends who qualify." This clears you of any concerns that you may have been considering lying.

The more complex answer is when they answer by giving you a form on the spot. Your job, in this case, is to scan the form and see if what they are asking you can be meaningfully verified by an official source.

Things that can be verified by an official source include, but are not limited to, your age, legal sex, income, veteran status, and place of residence. It's not generally a good idea to lie about these on official documents.

Be smart, and be practical. Do what you need to in order to stay alive, and keep an ear out for the people offering to help you do so.

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Starting my speech at the Omelas city counsel with a child acknowledgement statement

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every single photo I see of Kirby, the baby Asian elephant born at Houston Zoo, is absolutely killing me

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"I asked chatGPT" "I asked Grok"

yeah well i asked my friend joe and i asked my friend jake, they said it was fhqwhgads

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The fact that animals that care for their young will sometimes adopt others' lost or orphaned young to raise along their own is just funny to me. I know that it's all hormonal and there's no conscious thought involved in it, but the internal logic of it is so funny.

"Baby = success. More baby = more success. I have one baby and I found four other baby. I have five baby. I am being so fucking successful right now."

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+bonus Yeah, Jean-Luc, your presence is not necessary anymore.