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chimp-who-blog · 7 years ago

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Floating - thank u, next

When is it time to move on? At what point do you say to yourself, wait why am I putting myself through this self inflicted emotional hell just to be left on seen? Is it really a crush, do I actually like him or do I just like the thought of imaging myself with someone and being more then just friends?

Well to all my girls out there lets start with the basics...

There are two types of extremely emotionally testing crushes

1). the hot popular guy who if your lucky, knows the first letter of your name. This crush is developed fast and leaves you hooked on his every move; new haircut (hot), glasses (you’ve never seen anyone look so good with four eyes), walks (seductive af)... you get the idea. No matter the activity or what he says or wears your drawn even more to him and to the point that its uncontrollable. Now this is were it really hits, so you’ve been crushing for at least a month now, you’ve memorised his timetable, know the number of his locker, are familiar with his friend group and potential love interest threats. Maybe he’s caught on to your mammoth crush, maybe you two have said a few words to each other. But once again you get to that point of realisation, now this has been months in the making to where you get to a point and it clicks overnight ‘I don’t think I actually like the person that I have this crush on’. That moment of realisation is almost indescribable, but why don’t you like him anymore? At this point you reach the floating stage (yay!!!!!)

2). Oooof this one is even more draining then the first type of crush. Its the person who pops out of no where, you two might sit next to each other in math, or have lockers near each other or simply be a friend of a friends, someone who isn’t on your radar and if he didn’t approach you, you would’ve never even thought of him. But this type of crush provides you with conversation and validation (something very strange when jumping from crush no.1). You understand that he’s a nice guy and has a different almost undiscovered side to his personality that the majority doesn’t see, and this is when you start falling and you fall hard and fast my friend. Suddenly you start to replay all those 1am conversations you had with him and thinking wow this guy means something a little more then just a friend, whenever you talk your instantly in the overthinking mindset. Its no longer a free flowing and comfortable convo due to the fact you leave it 5 minutes before you come up with the perfect amount of fun and non-clingy response that has been drafted 4 times before you actually work up the courage to press send. You go from talking every night for over two hours, to talking for half an hour every couple of days until the last time you talked was 2 weeks ago and in that 2 weeks you have that realisation. After all he was just being a nice friend. You face the facts that you only liked him cuz he was giving you the attention that no one else was giving you. The fall down was tough, detaching yourself was harder but now the light at the end of the tunnel.

That realisation is actually a blessing in disguise you are reborn into a world filled with hope, you aren’t emotionally attached to someone who isn’t on the same page. You simply feel as though your floating, letting go of those toxic crushes leaves you on a high, your positivity beaming leaving you glowing with happiness. This state of mind is extremely important its almost better then a relationship, you realise that there is so much love and attention to give to others, that may be strengthening and becoming closer with your friends.

#floating #thank u next #cya #crushes #crushing #to all the boys i've loved before #movingon

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