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I'm encountering problems with the measuring tape.

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La letra con amor, entra. (via)

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hate an x reader fic do not put me in a situation

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fresh, clean no-terf version for reblogs!

Your mom and aunts aren’t on tumblr.  Please warn them about this as well. 

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For all of the northerners that stood up for Texas during our freeze and said, "Don't make fun of them, they've never dealt with this before. Their infrastructure isn't made for snow and freezing."

This one is for you.

Where I live 108°F with 80% humidity with no wind is normal.

Pacific North West is dealing historic best waves 35-40°C or 95-105°F.

First of all. Don't make fun of them for bitching about the heat. Just like Texas isn't built for a freeze and our pipes burst, Pacific North West isn't built for heat and a lot of their homes don't have AC.

If you live somewhere with a high humidity like 80+ HUMIDITY IS NOT YOUR FRIEND. The "humidity makes it feel cooler" is a lie once it gets beyond a point.

If you live somewhere with a lower humidity, misters are nice to cool off outside.

Once you get over 90°F (32°C) a fan will not help you. It's just pushing around hot air. (I mean if you can't afford a small AC unit because they're expensive as hell, by all means a fan is better than nothing).

If you have pets, those portable AC units aren't safe. If your pets destroy the outtake thing, it'll leak CO2. Window units are safer.

Window AC units will let mosquitoes or other small bugs in. Sucks, but that's life.

Now is not the time to me modest. If you have to cover for religious reasons, by all means. If you don't, I've seen people wear short shorts and a swim top. It's not trashy if it keeps you from getting heat stroke.

If you do have to cover up for religious reasons, look for elephant pants or something similar. They're made with a breathable material.

Shade is better than no shade, but that shit it just diet sun after some point. Don't think shade will save you from heat stroke.

I know the "drink your water" is a fun meme now, but if you're sweating excessively you need electrolytes. Drink Gatorade, Powerade, or Pedialite PLEASE. I don't care if you're fucking sitting in one spot all day. That shit WILL save you from heat stroke.

Most importantly. RESEARCH THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN HEAT STROKE AND HEAT EXHAUSTION PLEASE!

If you're diabetic and can't drink Gatorade, mix water, fruit juice, and either lite salt or pink salt

If you can afford it, cover windows with thick curtains to insulate the house

If you have tile floors, lay on them with skin to tile contact. If you don't, laying your head on cool counters works too.

If the temperature where you're at is hotter than your body temperature, don't wear heat wicking clothing. Moisture wicking is safe though.

Check your medication labels. Many make you more susceptible to sun and heat

-Room temperature water will get into your body faster. This is something I learned doing marching band in high summer in Georgia, and it saved all of our asses. Sip it, don't gulp it, especially if you're getting into the red; same goes for whatever fluid you're drinking. And just in general drink during the day.

-If you are moving from an air conditioned space to an un-air conditioned space, if at all possible try to make the shift gradual. When my dad and I were working outside and in un-ac houses a few years ago, he'd turn the air down to low in the truck about ten-fifteen minutes before we got where we were going. This way your body doesn't go from low low temps to high temps. S'bad for you.

-If you can, keep your lights off during the day. Light bulbs may not generate a lot of heat, but the difference is noticeable when it gets hot enough. I literally only turn my bedroom light on in the evening when it gets too dark.

Don't be afraid to just like... pour water on yourself if you need to. The evaporation will cool you off.

Put your hand to the cement for 15 seconds. If you can't handle the heat, it'll burn your dog's paws. Don't let them walk on it.

Dogs with flat faces are more prone to heat stroke. Don't leave them out unsupervised.

Frozen fruit is delicious in water.

Wet/Cold hat/handkerchief on your head/neck will help you stay cool.

Pickle juice is great for electrolytes! You can even make pickle juice Popsicles!

Heat exhaustion is more, "drink water and get you cooled off." Heat stroke is more "Oh my god call 911."

Image Description provided by @loveize

[Image description: an infographic showing the difference between heat exhaustion and heat stroke. The graphic is labeled "Heat Dangers: First Warning." Signs of heat exhaustion: faint or dizzy, excessive sweating, cool, pale, clammy skin, rapid, weak pulse, muscle cramps. If you think you or someone else may be experiencing heat exhaustion, get to a cool, air-conditioned place, drink water if conscious, and take a cool shower or use cold compress. Signs of heat stroke: throbbing headache, no sweating, red, hot, dry skin, rapid, strong pulse, may lose consciousness. If you think you or someone else may be experiencing heat stroke, call 911. End description]

Be safe.

-fae

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literally any upper middle class tiktok self-identified ‘that girl’ in a pastel workout set with a thirteen step skincare routine and a green juice is a million times closer to being patrick bateman irl than any self-identified sigma film bro

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unrestrained summer fun

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divorce themed restaurant menu

dessert: CUSTARDy Battle

yeah that's all i've got so far sorry

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nothing sexier than that picture with the italian players on top of eachother after the win and the english ones going through the 5 stages of grief in the back

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at work today i found out im a bard :/

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Link to thread

Link to news story

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In light of the world falling apart around us I propose we all share some fun curses from our countries/hometowns, to add some colour to angry language.

I'll go first (from Ireland)

1. "May the cat eat you, and the devil eat the cat"

2. "May the devil make a ladder of your spine"

3. "You can't expect anything from a pig but a grunt"

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Tenner

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*dies hundreds of years ago as the village fool* well that fucking sucked lol let’s try again *reincarnated as a tumblr user* FUUUUUUCK

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Trump is oblivious to the fact that he loves entertainment that is very popular with gay men. And now he is dragging JD Vance with him and JD is trying way too hard to signal he doesn't want to be there.

"I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT THE GAY MUSICALS! HAHAHAHAHA! HERE IS A DETAIL ABOUT A GAY MUSICAL THAT I WOULD ONLY KNOW IF I HAD SEEN THAT GAY MUSICAL. AHAHAHAHA. PLEASE LAUGH AT MY FUNNY JOKE, WIFE. I AM NOT GAY. PLEASE DON'T PUT IN THE NEWSPAPER THAT I AM GAY."

Meanwhile, Trump...

"I love YMCA. It's the greatest song ever recorded. The Village People were the last great band. Very catchy beats, from the standpoint of dancing. And I love that they were just regular working class guys with normal jobs. I tried to hire the construction worker to build Trump Tower, but he told me that wasn't the kind of tower he was into.

Broadway musicals are the highest form of entertainment from the standpoint of making me feel things. Les Mis, such a beautiful play. It's about bread, can you believe it? A whole musical about bread! You gotta pay for your bread, folks. Just give them $200 or whatever bread costs, show them your ID for buying groceries, and then you don't have to worry about the bread police, okay?

Later we're going to a wonderful bar called "The Bulge." Isn't that a funny name? I assume that is because all the men have big bulging muscles. Very fit, these guys. You'll never see more manly men. Very strong, very shiny guys. They could probably lift some heavy stuff, from the standpoint of weight.

Not quite as manly as the people over at Lumberjacked. Those are some very very hairy men. Very manly. Very good at handling wood, or so they tell me. The lumber industry is very important. 900% tariffs. We're bringing wood handling back to America.

They play a lot of Elton John there. My favorite musician and a great dresser, from the standpoint of sparkles. Lotta sparkly outfits, I love it."

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Mutuals will reblog gifsets of horror movies you’ve never even heard of