clarissaavoidsitall

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Marc Davis—Pirate’s of the Caribbean, Disneyland, early walk-thru design

[clarissaavoidsitall]

WELCOME BACK, QUEEN!

[clarissaavoidsitall]

no seriously imagine if all the tech research for disneyquest had gone toward market research to help eurodisney find friends in paris. imagine if the money had gone toward dca. i'm inventing an alternate universe that never had a chance of happening but that's the dreaming right

the more i learn about the disney decade the more furious i get about how much failed imagineering experimentation time and money went into arcades and play places while 90% of park plans were tossed out the window

[clarissaavoidsitall]

the more i learn about the disney decade the more furious i get about how much failed imagineering experimentation time and money went into arcades and play places while 90% of park plans were tossed out the window

[clarissaavoidsitall]

i just learned that magic kingdom's subs were buried after 20,000 leagues closed, and imagined archeologists unearthing them in 2000 years. we held a funeral for ride vehicles they're gonna think we worshiped these things and they'd be right omg

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people who don't like theme parks because they think they're too sanitized and boring have no idea what they're talking about

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Expanding Fantasyland means more to me than just decongesting that tight castle corridor (but that would be so nice). It's the heart of every castle park but Disneyland's is the smallest of them all, and it's perfect that way. Taking Autopia back, and grabbing the Submarines while it's at it, is for the best for Fantasyland and Tomorrowland both

With those two attractions, both opening day attractions themselves, Fantasyland can finally become an immersive experience. The Submarines would again go forward by going back, and return to a Mermaid Lagoon, and a new ride experience. It's time to update the ride vehicle, and with more space, the true entrance to the ride would be on land, on a beached pirate ship that "flies" up, and then the "sail" would fall, and seal over the guests as the ship sunk below the surface to visit mermaid scenes, and if they're very lucky a sneak peek at the mermaid performer working a short show a few times a day for those waiting in line above

The more space comes from Autopia, which can again be halved, if it stays at all. I'm not precious about Autopia, but I am easily swayed by the phrase "day one". In my Fantasyland expansion though, Neverland flows from Pixie Hollow all the way up to Small World, and the Lost Boys driving cars feels like a reach

A nod could be a carriage/horse/ship tour of their camp, piloted by guests on unique looking vehicles that still ultimately have a steering wheel/bar and a power pedal. It gives the power and exploration to young guests, without the "young drivers playing on the road" and "advertising real cars" angle of the original Autopia

There's still room for more seating in the Neverland woods, with a Lost Boys feasting cart and a shop - all of which feels like a must have for any addition to the park. More important for vibes and adding interaction to the park is another playground on a bigger scale than Toon Town's, but smaller than Redwood Challenge Trail - a chance for kids to run around and let loose between wait times for all the bigger and grander rides

The way that Tomorrowland has been left to fester lends to a lot of imagination. Is Disney making the good of the park perfect so they can completely demolish a lesser performing parts and spend years rebuilding, or are they taking their time to make their eventual reskins are more thoughtful and effective than conveniently cheap?

My ideal solution to Tomorrowland is a hybrid: completely removing Autopia to make room for an expansion on Fantasyland, and drastically reskinning the rest of Tomorrowland. I'm talking the expensive fixes, like repairing the Peoplemover, bringing back the Skyliner, moving the Astro Orbiter back to the elevated stand for the Rocket Jets, and not just fixing the Carousel building, but updating it to make the audience movement even more dynamic.

Reviving Tomorrowland has to have a mix of looking back to see what worked as it looks forward. That's what Tomorrow is. Infrastructure has been the biggest stall for fixing the land for years, and they just need to bite the bullet and do it

After those big fixes and allowance for nostalgia, they can gut away. The only building that stays almost entirely as it is is Space Mountain - the icon of the land and the character the rest of the land surrounds. If Tomorrow is in Space, the rest of the land needs to build and justify that. Which is why the only other surviving building is the Carousel, which won't come back with animatronics about historic progress, but instead an exploration of our solar system. A rotating and LIFTING planetarium, letting guests travel the stars and visit new planets with educational narration

Star Tours becomes the loading zone for the Peoplemover, and new Skyliner which heads straight toward Batuu to connect space to space. The rest of the building, and the Tomorrowland Theatre too, become a new kind of entertainment and walkthrough space. A step beyond Innovations, where guests can sit in a theatre watching a showcase of invention and technology used in the park, and can also see a tour of an Disneyland animatronic hospital/workshop, with an interactive chance to experiment themselves

Astro Blasters can go entirely, and in its place big crash set piece to establish the space colony where the land takes place, and a Disney take on those super fact spinning carnival rides. The food can use a little elevation, but mostly just to take out the Toy Story theming. Maybe a Meet The Robinson's nod would be appropriate, as a kind of funny mirror to the new-old treehouse

Disney might be dragging their feet updating Tomorroland because it's precious. And it is. It's a broken land, but it's still and opening day land, and Space Mountain is a big icon of the park itself. For a long time, it was the land in the park, where all the best rides were, and everyone wanted to get pictures. There were shows, and attractions to interact with, and displays to learn from, and rides to relax and rides to thrill and rides for the whole family, and that's why it's imperative that the Tomorrowland we have today does change. Tomorrowland's best days can't be yesterday

[clarissaavoidsitall]

The way that Tomorrowland has been left to fester lends to a lot of imagination. Is Disney making the good of the park perfect so they can completely demolish a lesser performing parts and spend years rebuilding, or are they taking their time to make their eventual reskins are more thoughtful and effective than conveniently cheap?

My ideal solution to Tomorrowland is a hybrid: completely removing Autopia to make room for an expansion on Fantasyland, and drastically reskinning the rest of Tomorrowland. I'm talking the expensive fixes, like repairing the Peoplemover, bringing back the Skyliner, moving the Astro Orbiter back to the elevated stand for the Rocket Jets, and not just fixing the Carousel building, but updating it to make the audience movement even more dynamic.

Reviving Tomorrowland has to have a mix of looking back to see what worked as it looks forward. That's what Tomorrow is. Infrastructure has been the biggest stall for fixing the land for years, and they just need to bite the bullet and do it

After those big fixes and allowance for nostalgia, they can gut away. The only building that stays almost entirely as it is is Space Mountain - the icon of the land and the character the rest of the land surrounds. If Tomorrow is in Space, the rest of the land needs to build and justify that. Which is why the only other surviving building is the Carousel, which won't come back with animatronics about historic progress, but instead an exploration of our solar system. A rotating and LIFTING planetarium, letting guests travel the stars and visit new planets with educational narration

Star Tours becomes the loading zone for the Peoplemover, and new Skyliner which heads straight toward Batuu to connect space to space. The rest of the building, and the Tomorrowland Theatre too, become a new kind of entertainment and walkthrough space. A step beyond Innovations, where guests can sit in a theatre watching a showcase of invention and technology used in the park, and can also see a tour of an Disneyland animatronic hospital/workshop, with an interactive chance to experiment themselves

Astro Blasters can go entirely, and in its place big crash set piece to establish the space colony where the land takes place, and a Disney take on those super fact spinning carnival rides. The food can use a little elevation, but mostly just to take out the Toy Story theming. Maybe a Meet The Robinson's nod would be appropriate, as a kind of funny mirror to the new-old treehouse

Disney might be dragging their feet updating Tomorroland because it's precious. And it is. It's a broken land, but it's still and opening day land, and Space Mountain is a big icon of the park itself. For a long time, it was the land in the park, where all the best rides were, and everyone wanted to get pictures. There were shows, and attractions to interact with, and displays to learn from, and rides to relax and rides to thrill and rides for the whole family, and that's why it's imperative that the Tomorrowland we have today does change. Tomorrowland's best days can't be yesterday

[clarissaavoidsitall]

If I could design an entire new Disney park I think it would be really fun to try to be a kind of alternate reality Disneyland. The original lands are all based on common story tropes, which has been replaced by movie settings. And that’s fun too, but there’s other story tropes that could be just as fun.

A Mysteryland, based on dark but kind of campy noir stories. The buildings are tall and angled. It features a hole-in-the-wall diner, live shows of chases or dramatic confrontations, and has room for The Great Mouse Detective, maybe even The Incredibles.

Medievalland, based around knights and adventure and high fantasy. It’s misty and ancient, the food is hardy and sold in houses or carts. There’s room for Brave, Robin Hood, even Onward with the right angle.

Villains Land feels like a bit of a return to this, and the idea of mixing characters together in one setting, and it allows for the park itself to become a way to tell stories. If Villains Land becomes a land that Disneyland gets at a 3rd gate, there could be a counterpoint Land of Imagination, a home for IP like Soul and Inside Out, as well as magic characters that focus on dreaming and hoping, and the two lands could have rival parades

[clarissaavoidsitall]

disney content is so numerous yet so homogeneous that when you search for specific content you find hundreds of videos but it's all reactions to reactions to reactions

[clarissaavoidsitall]

Sorry if you're finding out via my PJS Destiel meme, but it's true:

💔💔💔 I'm so sad about Muppet*Vision 3D... BUT... check out the Rock'n'Roller Coaster teaser art??!!?!

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This actually isn’t Disneyland related at all but Universal Orlando is opening up a third park and while they’ve announced that one land will be a Nintendo land, there are three more lands they have room for but haven’t announced what they are yet and I am here to shout from the rooftops that I want Berk.

Berk! Berk!! BERK!!!!!

I want authentic architecture, at least two island parts connected by multiple rickety looking bridges, and an larger than life viking ship. Plus, obviously, multiple dragon animatronics. I’m imagining a boat ride, a flying simulator, a dragon coaster, and a stunt show. This would be my absolute dream land and I think I would honestly actually literally move there if the post office would deliver to “roof of a viking shack in an orlando theme park”

[clarissaavoidsitall]

A Frozen Ride

I’m not a big fan of the Frozen dark ride at Epcot, so when I think about Disneyland adding some sort of Frozen attraction I hope they go with something new. Here’s one pitch:

It’s post-movie, and begins as a reindeer drawn carriage through some familiar scenes from Arendelle. Elsa and Anna are working on something together, then Kristoff and Sven have a mishap of some sort, and the reindeer from the guest cart comes detached! From there it’s a (gently) thrilling sled ride as the small carriages roll outside of town and through the woods, which in some places has snow falling. Elsa then does some magic to help guide the carts back to safety.

Like I said, I’m not a fan of the Frozen dark ride, I think dark rides are largely dependent on story and character and iconic situations, and Frozen has a bit of a convoluted story and not really any iconic situations. It has fun characters though, and the dark ride doesn’t take the best advantage of them. They just appear and say some lines. It also, I don’t think, properly utilizes the iconic visuals from the movie because so much of the visuals are reliant on how snow moves, not just how it’s sparkles in the light.

Outside of what I think a Frozen ride needs, I think the park itself would thrive with a year-round winter adventure. Dark rides are classic, but more and more rides are trying to mix them with at least a little bit of thrill. And sledding is an activity that kids often idealize but don’t get to do a lot anymore, so it’d be a nice novel experience.

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A summary of what Disney is proposing:

1- Open up a third gate in Anaheim. It looks so far like a slightly smaller park, and it would take over a big chunk of Downtown Disney, as well as other office and admin buildings around their three hotels.

This could be very exciting. The ideas proposed are for more immersive lands, on par with Galaxy’s Edge and Pandora, with the themes being a Frozen Arendelle land, and wooded Tangled land, and Neverland.

2- Doing something, no hard plans suggested yet beyond “could include a theme park, hotel, retail, dining and entertainment” in what is probably entirely admin buildings south of the current parks. This area is probably also already owned by Disney, but I’m honestly not sure. [EDIT: I’m a dumbdumb this is the Toy Story Parking lot]

This is personally, far less exciting. It’s not attached to the existing parks, and doesn’t seem to even be able to connect fully. It’s not land that currently has any on-stage presence [EDIT: it’s the parking lot oops], and there’s a lot on the site making very clear that none of these plans are legally possible right now because of Anaheim city zoning, so a vague promise of “more” doesn’t seem worth it all to kick up a fuss about it. Zoning laws also seem to be in the way of the third gate, but considering a huge chunk of that area is already set as entertainment space it seems like a smaller hurdle with a bigger reward. This one feels a bit more like “oh no we shrunk Downtown Disney let’s make a second Downtown Disney somewhere else.”

3- Between these two HUGE proposals are plans for California Adventure that seem pretty possible, so I’m not sure why they’re included between the more lofty new park goals. Maybe there’s some height limitations they’re fighting with the city about or something. The new plans are 1- Zootopia. 2- Toy Story Land, 3- Tron Lightcycle Run.

It’s not clear where any of these will go, but there are plenty of hints that Toy Story Land would replace Pixar Pier (”Guests can take a ride on Slinky Dog Dash, a roller coaster Andy assembled from his Mega Coaster Toy Kit. They can also join the little green aliens as they swirl about in their rocket ship toys in the Alien Swirling Saucers. The land also includes carnival games and a restaurant, Woody’s Lunch Box” Yeah that’s Pixar Pier - Incredicoaster, Lamplight Lounge, Emotional Whirlwind - all remastered)

Zootopia would fit well over Hollywood Land, as that’s already a cityscape. Tron though...that wouldn’t fit anywhere in California Adventure. I mean there’s space for it sure, but thematically? The only place I wouldn’t mind it going is over by Paradise Gardens, as long as they also theme that sad food court land around it somehow, and I do wonder how any of that Tron theming will work on the waterfront, especially at night when it will fight with World of Color or I guess just entirely shut down the way that Paradise Gardens does currently.

As exciting as some of these ideas are, I’m a little baffled by the combative tone. Not that they’re taking it, they’ve long had a strange sort of entitlement to the entire city of Anaheim that I’m frankly not a fan of, but that their reasoning for why they think they have to make this a fight at all. There’s a phrase in the opening that seems to spark the fight and it really honestly bothers me: “We want to bring more Disney investment to Anaheim. However, this simply isn’t possible under current inflexible planning restrictions unless we remove and replace treasured rides and attractions in our Parks today.”

I just really disagree that there’s nothing that can go away in Disneyland and that the only option is to expand further into the city. I’ve made proposals on this blog for an Arendelle village and a Tangled attraction! There’s plenty of room for both (though of course not on the massive scale the new lands would be on) where Autopia is. But the above statement seems to imply that everything that’s currently in Disneyland is too sacred to ever go. And it’s just not. Autopia was there opening day, I understand the importance and sentimentality of it; but it doesn’t represent tomorrow at all at this point and the ride experience is severely lacking when it comes to current standards for Disney magic.

Heck, it was a bit of a twist to see Tron thrown in with DCA remodels because in Shanghai where it was developed, and in Disney World Magic Kingdom, where it’s currently being built, that coaster is in Tomorrowland. Magic Kingdom is taking out their Speedway (the Autopia equivalent) to build Tron! Tomorrowland in general is in desperate need for modernization and has been for years.

And there are other lands that will need the same pretty soon: namely Frontierland and honestly Adventureland. Again, this time they’re whole opening day lands with beloved attractions rather than just one outdated attraction, so understand thinking they can’t be touched. But while Adventureland is still somewhat able to keep its heart as it rethinks how it treats its inspiration locales, it is positively tiny, which makes it feel lesser than a lot of giant new parks. Frontierland on the other hand has been struggling to remain on brand as it gets rid of its openly offensive aspects. There’s a lot of options to combine them into one larger land, keeping the best parts of Adventureland and letting it get more magical and wild with more IP as it travels upward toward Galaxy’s Edge.

If Disneyland wants to talk about allowing their flagship resort to keep up with the other, newer parks in terms of technology and experience, it seems very strange to take the position that one park should forever stay as Walt last saw it due to sentimentality, and the actual solution is to simply surround that first park with something fancier.

[clarissaavoidsitall]

It feels weird to go into too much detail about Galaxy’s Edge or any of the attractions there, since Disneyland closed so soon after it opened, but it’s virtually identical in Disney World, which has been open for a while, so there’s some context I think.

I’ll say upfront the land itself is almost completely perfect. It’s got an amazing look, an amazing sound, an amazing smell. It’s a little shopping heavy I’ll admit, which when it comes to the stores I don’t mind because the stores are so interesting, but I do think the merch carts take away the atmosphere (but I think that about all merch carts everywhere, they just blend better in New Orleans). And I realize the purpose of the land is to feel immersive (which it does! When not looking at a merch cart you will feel fully transported I promise you), I do wish they’d broken their “no signs” rule for like...bathrooms. And in general, I wish there were more attractions. Either in the form of live entertainment or a lower-tier ticket ride like the animatronic tour ride they pitched in the early stages. But that’s it for criticism as far as the land goes. I can’t even say anything bad about blue/green milk because I don’t have the cilantro thing that makes them taste like soap to some people. I could sit in Galaxy’s Edge all day, just watching the characters wander around, listening to the droids chatter, watching the sun reflect off of the rock walls - it’s a magical experience.

But if there was one thing in Galaxy’s Edge I’d want to get my hands on, it’s Smugglers Run. It’s a fun ride, it’s got an amazing line experience (although nothing beats the line experience of Rise of the Resistance holy moly I don’t want to spoil that one for anyone but I am promising you you will enjoy the line experience as much as the ride itself), but there are some glaring issues. Namely, 2/3s of the guests are getting a significantly worse experience.

All rides have The Best Seat, like when given the chance heck yes I prefer to sit in the top row of Soarin’ so I don’t see any dangling feet, or the front row of any roller coaster besides Space Mountain so I get to be the first person to see the drops and turns, but Smuggler’s Run’s seat differential is a step beyond.

Not many people have been able to ride it, so I’ll explain that there are six seats in Smugglers Run: two pilots (one controls vertical flight, the other horizontal, and only one gets to make the jump to lightspeed), two gunners (who fire harpoons at the cargo we’re supposed to be stealing), and two engineers (who fix the ship when we get hit). The most preferential seat is obviously the one that gets to jump to lightspeed, because that’s an emotional moment, but both pilot seats are the ride at at its best. They’re in the front row in front of the window/screen and they have steering controls that look like steering controls. It feels a little weird to split up horizontal and vertical flight, but it feels not dissimilar to what you imagine flying a spaceship is like.

The others sit in staggered seats behind, and push buttons. They aren’t just a less good view because you’re sitting behind someone, they’re less good because the interactivity is generic and the view isn’t even of the window. The gunner and engineer panels are on the side of the ship, so to do your job you can’t look at the magical space battle going on in front of you. The interactivity is also generic button-pushing, no aiming for the gunners or details about what you’re fixing for the engineers. Those guests are an afterthought of an afterthought and it’s pretty frustrating honestly.

The point, I imagine, was to make the ride accessible to all levels of familiarity with gaming. Too detailed and only teens and young adults could play, leaving out little kids and older adults. But there are some ways to make the back seats engaging and unique without feeling too hard.

For the gunners, give them aiming power. Right now, the pilots do more aiming than the gunners, because they make the ship level with the cargo, and all the gunners do is fire when ready. I think they do use arrow buttons to aim a little (it was my plan to experiment next time I rode it, but alas), but because the buttons are on the side of the ship facing away from the window they can’t actually see what they’re doing. There are two options to fix this:

1) The panel can still be on the side of the ship, but there could be a display screen that echos what’s going on “outside” the window just rendered more simply so it looks like aiming algorithms. The gunners use arrow buttons to move the exterior harpoon and then a fire button. So it’s still buttons, maybe even the same buttons they have now, but they can see what they’re doing and it feels more specialized.

2) The gunners, currently in the middle of the cockpit, are moved to the back and put on a small platform that echos the separate room Luke and Chewy fire from when they use the Falcon’s weapons systems in the movies. There’s firing mechanism is the bike handle-looking thing on a stick, again from the movies, and because they’re slightly elevated from the rest of the cockpit they can see over the pilot’s head to the screen to aim directly. This of course would require rebuilding all the cockpits which would be daunting for Disney but would honestly turn the gunner position into a coveted seat.

For the engineers, there is one incredibly simple fix: give them a screen of the ship on their panel (which can still be next to them on the wall), that has parts start flashing when they need repair. The buttons they push have clear visual links to what they’re fixing on the ship. Right now it’s literally just flashing buttons. Hondo yells a little, sometimes saying what’s wrong with the ship, but it’s a loud ride and words don’t really mean anything when Disneyland is such an international draw. Literally just...give the engineers a picture of what they’re doing. Give them levels, like the engines are flashing yellow but the shields are flashing red, which do you fix first?

Smugglers Run is some honestly breakthrough technology, with a cool story. It’s like Star Tours in the ride experience will never be the same twice, because the pilots will take different routes or the gunners will get a different number of cargo, or the ship is damaged in a different way. Or just that you the guest are sitting somewhere different doing something different! And to make that part of the customization to the next level, the seats all have to have something unique about them. The pilot seats are perfect, they were who this ride was designed for. But there are four more people in the cockpit with the pilot, they deserve a fun time too.

[clarissaavoidsitall]

Fun Things to Add to Hollywood Land

Turn Monsters Inc. ride into a revamped Great Movie Ride, with special effect demonstrations and animatronic reenactments

Turn Stage 12 into a Mary Poppins dark ride, taking guests along Mary’s routine going to parks and dancing on the rooftops of London hanging from their own flying umbrellas (two person seats, flying over sets and models like the Peter Pan system)

Take out the Studio Store, Schmoozies, the Hollywood Backlot Stage, and the Fairfax Market to make way for 1) a new restaurant, styled after a mildly sleazy piano bar (with scheduled live music performances of disney songs done in a jazzy style) and 2) a cocktail bar (alcoholic and juice)

If we still need a store for when Studio 17 isn’t also a superstore, there can be a small one attached to the two new eateries