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[cloudpiercinghunter]

"That's not really better." She'd still be getting him tons of stuff, and it would probably be even more of a thing if she gave it to him all at once.

"It's fine. I'm just not used to getting gifts. I didn't exactly have many people back home to give them."

"Nonsense! What kind of senior would I be if I didn't splurge a little for the cuties?" Gift giving was just her way of showing affection! Her way of letting them know she still thought about them when she was away for so long!

"But I suppose if you reeeeally wanted me to ease up, I could just wait to give you your gifts and give you a bunch at once."

[cloudpiercinghunter]

He wasn't going to outright say it, but he did appreciate the gift. And he wasn't going to outright say it because he wasn't that great with emotions so expressing it would probably end up wrong.

"Thanks," he eventually said. "Bringing me gifts every time isn't really necessary, though."

"Ah March. She reminds me of myself back when I first joined the Express. But far less actual jail time." a classic duo, the wild card and the stoic.

She wanted to ruffle his hair, but refrained, instead she took a book out of her bag, handing it over to him. "Until I can wrangle enough tools for the lesson, this gift will have to suffice. It's an almanac from the latest planet I was visiting. It's been out of contact with other planets for a while so I thought it's data could be put in the system."

[cloudpiercinghunter]

Dan Heng stared at her blankly for a few moments before saying, "That was March. I've spent enough time in jail."

And at the suggestion, he said, "Sure. I'm always up for learning something new."

"Haven't you almost gotten arrested quite a few times on your expeditions?" She'd heard from Pom-Pom that the young'ins had a few run ins with the law themselves.

"I'll have to teach you all the best ways to fashion a lockpick out of whatever you have on you. You never know when you'll need a good lockpick."

[cloudpiercinghunter]

"Vidyadhara are descendants of Long the Permanence. Rather than dying, we molt and revert to an egg after about six hundred years. So, essentially, we're immortal. And most of the time, we don't remember too much about our previous lives. Which means that I'll likely both outlive the Astral Express crew and forget about them."

A pause, and then, "But that isn't one of my primary concerns right now. If you're interested in learning more, I can share some entries from the databank. Stelle seems to like you, so I feel like I can trust you with it." It's not like he was giving her direct access, either way.

"Yeah, that's something a bit out of my wheelhouse. Not that the IPC isn't interested, but any efforts to work with the Xianzhou Alliance haven't gone over well. That's outside of my department and probably above my rank anyway. Unless they ever end up with an unpaid debt to us." Which she highly doubted would happen in her lifetime.

"The name is familiar though. All I know is they're a long life species, but most living there are."

[cloudpiercinghunter]

"It is. They don't like having unknown variables around. It can be just as hard for a Xianzhou native to get permission to leave their ship, even just to travel to another one. At least, so I'm told." He'd been pointedly escorted off the ship and banished for several years.

A pause, and then, "I just happened to be one of the unknown variables they didn't want to deal with. But I doubt you know much about Vidyadhara so it wouldn't mean much to you."

"A man of many talents. No wonder you're with the Nameless." She couldn't say she was very familiar with the ins and outs of the Xianzhou. It was on a need to know basis and the Alliance felt the IPC did not need to know. Still, she understood a few key things. "Huh, it's not too often you see people away from the Xianzhou. I've heard it's an annoying paperwork process to get through."

[cloudpiercinghunter]

"I'm also the guard of the Express." A long pause. Since the Luofu, he'd been trying to be more open with people, and it's not as if someone from the IPC would really care about him. They had almost zero presence within the Xianzhou.

"I am a Vidyadhara from the Xianzhou Luofu trained in the Cloud Knight's style of fighting. I just prefer not to fight if I don't need to."

"If it helps, Numby is very professional. Best partner in the business." At the sound of their own praises, Numby seemed to puff up proudly, letting out a squeak.

"I heard you were sort of the guard for the express, but you know archivist makes more sense." Considering she had yet to personally see him out fighting. In her head, he was just the guy that stayed back on the train. In fact she was pretty sure she had heard the term nerd tossed around. Probably from March. "Your data banks really must be vast to even include me in them. Hopefully all good things."

[cloudpiercinghunter]

"I do. And if we go somewhere with water, I'd like to be able to swim. But even a beach episode can end up with conflict."

Of course he's watched about as much anime as she had.

"Either way, there's nothing stopping us from going back to planets we've been to for a vacation. Although I suppose Jarilo-VI isn't good for that."

She pursed her lips and glanced away. Clearly guilty of the charges here. "Maaaayyybbbeeee."

"It's how we bond okay." They were also very addictive to watch. "Think of it though-" She wrapped an arm around him, the other waving out in front of them to paint the picture. "The sun, the sand, the waterrrrr. You like water right?"

[cloudpiercinghunter]

@honkaisteinrail sent a meme:

“ In my defense, I simply do not vibe with the law. ”

Lomic had only visited a couple times since he joined the Express, but somehow, this didn't surprise him at all.

"...yes, well, despite that, we do try to stay on the correct side of the law. Or at least not bring attention to it when we don't." Says the guy who grew up in a prison but. Details.

[cloudpiercinghunter]

He considered that for a moment, looking down to the warp trotter. They had a cape and pair of sunglasses on.

"Technically, yes, though if it's just a visitor, Pom-Pom would probably be alright with it."

A pause, and then, "Yes, I knew who you were. I maintain the Astral Express's data bank. The Stonehearts have a few entries in it."

"Sounds about right. I just happen to keep running into the others while working. Nice to meet you. I'm Topaz, and that's Numby." She glanced down at the warp trotter by her feet. "I keep meaning to visit, but I also heard the Astral Express has a thing about no pets?"

[cloudpiercinghunter]

A long pause, and then, "You've been watching anime with Tomiko again, haven't you?" Because of course he knows what she's talking about.

"Maybe it's the sort of cool hip things people say on the net these days." Dan Heng did not know anything hip at all. The cool part maybe, but did it really count if it was subconscious.

"I know crazy times come with the job, but I think we deserve a 'beach episode' or maybe a 'hot springs episode'. Something to rejuvenate our spirits to get us ready for the next adventure."

[cloudpiercinghunter]

"I am. I opted out of participating in either of the missions you met Stelle and March in." He tilted his head as he looked at her.

"I'm fairly sure the only ones you haven't met are the conductor and our cook. Pom-Pom doesn't leave the Express." They couldn't, as far as he knew.

"Weird, I was about to ask you the same thing." Since he was the one who had been quietly staring at her.

She tilted her head to look him over. Topaz was sure she hadn't met him before, but the way he showed up she had a pretty good guess. "You must be Dan Heng. If so, then I've almost met just about everyone from the express now."

[cloudpiercinghunter]

@numbynumbers

Considering Dan Heng hadn't participated in either quest Topaz showed up during, he found himself just staring at her after she'd talked with the others. Even when she turned to him, he didn't actually have anything to say.

"...can I help you?"

[cloudpiercinghunter]

"That's... not really something I hear people say, so I probably would think of something else that fits better." But he has nothing to offer.

"It's just how things go. I don't think the Path of Trailblaze is ever meant to be calm."

"What? Funky good time?" She pondered that for a moment. "I don't really remember hearing it exactly, I just felt the phrase in my heart."

"But I mean it fits right? Can't just go have a fun trip anywhere. Instead we get freaky bad times."

[cloudpiercinghunter]

"A lot," he repeated, letting her stay there for now. He didn't personally think he had a very comforting presence, but she did. "I know." Really, what else was there to say?

She sighed, unwilling to back away despite Dan Heng's usual distance. Granted he wasn't pushing her away but she knew he also wasn't the most demonstrative in terms of affection.

"You could say that," Her voice remained muffled against his neck where her face rested. "Penacony is...was..." Words failed her at that moment.

[cloudpiercinghunter]

@freezingcutie sent a meme:

“Why can’t this family ever have a funky good time?”

"I-" He cut himself off. Apparently he had no clue how to actually answer that.

"Where in the world did you hear that expression?" Yeah that's as much as he can say.

[cloudpiercinghunter]

@crownshattered sent a meme:

“   Currently considering becoming a bother and a nuisance, maybe even a menace or a rascal. ” (From Stelle. I am so sorry 👍)

He just gives her a long stare.

"Becoming?" That's all he has to say to that. She's been like that the entire time he's known her.

[cloudpiercinghunter]

ABSOLUTELY UNHINGED COMEDIC RELIEF

ASSORTED QUOTES FROM TUMBLR TEXTPOSTS, X (formerly known as twitter) POSTS, TIKTOK, MEMES, AND OTHER SOURCES AROUND THE INTERNET

CHANGE gendered words and in-universe phrases as needed.

SPECIFY muse for multimuses.

“   Currently considering becoming a bother and a nuisance, maybe even a menace or a rascal. ”

“   Hungry? Eat the government. ”

“   Yes, I wanna fuck after every argument. ”

“   Silence, you uneducated peanut! ”

“  They should invent a being alive that isn’t so difficult. ”

“   Women have to think I’m hot or none of this matters. ”

“   Due to personal reasons I will be named an enemy of the state. ”

“   Being overdressed is a myth made up by people who didn’t want you to have fun and be sexy. ”

“   What even are daddy issues? Just traumatize your father back. ”

“   I LOVE complaining! You can’t take that away from me! ”

“   I went to the silly goose convention and they all knew you. ”

“   I’m simultaneously ‘I’m tired of this grandpa’ and ‘that’s too damn bad!’ ”

“   The word ew coming out of a pretty girl’s mouth holds so much power … I think that it can tear apart nations. ”

“   Someone made fun of my shoes and the whole time I just thought of ways to push them out the window. ”

“   If you’re short, simply get taller. ”

“   I better think twice? Buddy I don’t even think once. ”

“   My off putting looks, awkward demeanor, and strange behavior have captivated you. ”

“   There’s something deeply, fundamentally wrong with you. Can we kiss? ”

“   You are a fool. When you walk, clown music plays. ”

“   I mean yeah he’s evil and all but what if I were his favorite? ”

“   I really do hate thinking. ”

“   In my defense, I simply do not vibe with the law. ”

“   I’ve done nothing wrong. Except all the atrocities. Besides that, I’m innocent. ”

“   Sorry I couldn’t hear you over my internal monologue. ”

“   Of course you have white hair and trauma. ”

“   So apparently the bad vibes I’ve been feeling are actually ‘severe psychological distress’. ”

“   Stop calling me a bad person just because I’m orchestrating your downfall! ”

“   The more lip gloss I collect the longer I live. ”

“   Sorry that I am obsessed with you in the unhealthiest way possible. As if it's my fault ”

“   The multiple failed assassination attempts against me have helped build both character and self esteem. ”

“   I could be your loser boyfriend. Do you ever think about that? ”

“   Accidentally went and got myself killed yesterday, but god wont let me die so I’m back ”

“   What do you mean napping isn't a good coping mechanism? What do you mean my problems are still here? ”

“   Academic validation is required for my sanity. ”

“   RIP to everyone killed by the gods for hubris but I’m different and better. Maybe even better than the gods. ”

“   Researching the stages of grief to see if I can get them finished in ten minutes tops. ”

“   My parents were like I’m gonna make a child that is so beyond help. ”

“   It’s not easy to admit when you’re wrong, and that’s why I won’t do it. ”

“   Why can’t this family ever have a funky good time? ”

“   How do I show people that I’m more than my unethical career choice? ”

“   I fucked my way into this mess, and I’ll fuck my way out. ”

“   You look so biteable today. ”

“   Why am I suffering? I have so many correct opinions and takes. ”

“   I AM HAUNTED BY A PAST THAT I CANNOT GO BACK TO! anyways ”

“   Challenging authority, angering gods. The family business. ”

“   Third base is me telling you about my father. ”

“   Hey girl. Plagued by terrifying visions? ”

“   Got caught giving a fuck. Embarrassing. ”

“   I didn’t ‘miss’ the red flags; I saw them and thought that they looked sexy. ”

“   Do my dark circles and deteriorating health make me look hot? ”

“   I get my news from the only reliable source, cryptic symbolism in my dreams. ”

“   Another day of being a bisexual disaster. ”

“   I’m going to let myself be a little unhinged today, as a treat. ”

“   Some of you act like murder is such a big deal. ”

“   You wanna hunt me for sport so bad that it makes you look stupid. ”

“   You’re not a girlboss unless you’ve killed someone. ”

“   It’s so weird how no one ever has correct opinions about things except for me. ”

“   Hello, my love — I mean, my rival ”

“   No one is calling me baby and it’s outrageous I can’t believe it. ”

“   No talking stage. Mutual obsession and you see god in my eyes or nothing. ”

“   I DON’T UNDERSTAND HOOKUP CULTURE DIE IN MY ARMS ”

“   Yes baby your emotional walls are high and impenetrable can we kiss now? ”

“   Affection is disgusting. Drown me in it. ”

“   I am gatekeeping my respect from you. ”

“   Well, well, well, if it isn’t the consequences of my own actions. ”

“   I am equal parts fuck around and find out and please don’t yell at me I’ll cry. ”

“   Short legs, big butt. I’m a corgi. ”

“   Fuck being the bigger person; I’m going to start biting people. ”

“   Well that wasn’t very slay of you! ”

“   May I please get a crumb of affection? ”

“   I crave power! Please don’t yell, though; I’m sensitive. ”

“   You call it a near death experience; I call it a vibe check from God. ”

“   Here are some scissors. Now cut it out. ”

“   Might commit a little tomfoolery, maybe even some shenanigans. ”

“   All these flavors, and you choose to be salty. ”

“   How can I live, laugh, love in these conditions? ”

“   What if I said ‘to be honest’ but then lied? ”

“   I'm financially at a stage where I understand why people do fraud. ”

“   Yes I may be evil and morally corrupt, but I’m also incredibly beautiful and I think that makes up for it honestly. ”

“   Debates are stupid. Why would I want to sit down and argue with someone blatantly dumber than me? ”

“   I forget but I do NOT forgive.. I'm just walking around hating bitches can't remember why ”

“   Ding dong your opinion is wrong! ”

“   I’m coming for your kneecaps. ”

“   You dropped your nose you fucking clown. ”

“   Are you a fire alarm? ‘Cause you are really fucking loud and annoying. ”

“   Call me an escalator, because I let people down. ”

“   I love me a good lesbian scandal! ”

“   If you can’t run away from your problems, you’re not running fast enough. ”

“   Everything I want to do is illegal. ”

“   Don’t make me hit your ankle with my Barbie scooter! ”

“   I tell gay jokes because I am a gay joke. ”

“   Fuck! I dropped my mental stability! ”