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How to spot a fake SD on SA? I've been speaking to so many yet have no found one that is actually good and willing to give me the $$. And my bills are coming up. Please help

Signs of a Salt Daddy

-he makes less than $300,000 a year - never mentions money - is whorephobic - becomes agitated when money is mentioned - says he wants to “get to know you and see if you guys get along” before paying you - doesn’t want the relationship to be “transactional” - asks “what’s in it for him” when you mention your arrangement

Remember that if a man truly wants something, he’ll pay for it

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Take A Deep Breath... You’ll Be Okay

Many years ago, eleven to be exact, I began my journey as an independent companion. 

When I first started there was one advertising site that was the “go to” site. 

That was escorts.com - but then a few years later it shut down. 

See this link here.

Nearly a year before that Craigslist closed its sex related advertising as well.

There was a lot of speculation about what would happen since Craigslist & Escorts.com shut down, and that’s when Backpage began becoming increasingly popular.

What did we see? We saw the transition from one advertising site to the next as the government tried harder and harder to crack down on adult services. 

When Craigslist closed there was a migration over to escorts.com and when it closed there was a migration over to back-page. 

The question now is, where do you take your advertising dollars, and what will be the most lucrative ad site/review site/message board for YOU to use based on your area? 

Here are some suggestions:

Utopia Guide

Adultwork

Preferred411

GFE Forum 

Red Rolo

USA SexGuide

Adult Search

Cityvibe

Date-Check

Eros

Escort Cafe

Girl Directory

Humaniplex

Lovings

My Provider Guide

Naughty Nightlife

Open Adult Directory

Slixa

NightShift

BestGFE

SouthernGFE

ECCIE

Captain 69

Canada Adult Fun

Avenue-X

Grain-Belt News

Naughty Reviews

The Erotic Review

The Other Board

TNA Review Board

Ohio Hard Drive

CAF Reviews

Indys

Russ

RS2K

Body Rockin

Escort Meetings

World Escorts

Geisha Affair

Hot Escorts Worldwide

Angel Elite

Escort Supermodel

Escorts Hunter

Sex CIA

This is not a full comprehensive list. 

I am sure there are MANY more out there.

I don’t want YOU to panic. 

Some of these sites are easy to use. Some of them are a pain in the fucking ass. Some of them are free, some are more costly than your car payments. It is up to YOU to ensure that you are advertising in the places that are the most lucrative for you. 

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why men think sending their photo will motivate me to send mine? like.. look at me and then look at yourself.

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WHAT

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i can’t believe margaret atwood is a fan of homestuck

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What should I wear (as a newbie) to a first POT date, considering I have nothing fancy like Chanel or so ?

Hello!

For a (first) POT date: - leather jacket from Zara (or anywhere else), fitted long sleeve of your choice, and jeans - a form fitting dress (doesn’t matter where you buy it, solid colour is preferable)- blazer, nice blouse, high-waisted pants, and a pair of pumps

The brand does not matter, wear whatever makes you comfortable. Men cannot even differentiate between designer of high-street 90% of the time. Just be confident in whatever you’re wearing! Ps- don’t slouch.

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The Ultimate Guide to POT Dates

POT noun, (pronounced: pē-oh-tē) A potential Sugar Daddy. This is a man you have not met yet, but are considering starting an arrangement with, or have been on a date with, but haven’t established anything solid yet. In short, a man who you think could potentially be your sugar daddy, but aren’t quite sure yet.

So you’ve checked out his profile, messaged with him a little, decided he could be the one for you; the main question asked now is - what do I do next?

The answer is simple, but for the Sugar Babies who are new, it’s often terrifying. Using the experience I’ve gotten after being a Sugar Baby for a while, I’ve put together a complete guide on how to handle that very first date, so that maybe it goes a little smoother than mine did! xo

Before You Meet

Get a feel for him over messaging/text - There’s nothing worse than being stuck for an hour or two with a man who has an attitude, is full of himself, or is just salty, that’s why it’s important to work out what type of person he is.                  ‣ Identifying Factors:                         - He has a sleezy username on SA: if his username is ‘CunnilingusMaster69′ or something along those lines, it’s blatantly obvious what’s he looking for.                         - His responses don’t mirror yours: think about conversational mirroring and use it to help you gauge the success of your conversation. It’s a form of social psychology that is pretty important to how anyone is perceived. If you’re typing out paragraph after paragraph and he is replying with short responses (or vice versa), it’s obvious one party is more interested than the other.                         - He asks for sexual photos: if he’s asking for sexual photos without even met with you for the first time, then he’s got one thing on his mind and it’s probably pay per play. However, most Sugar Daddy’s will ask for extra photo’s, to make sure you’re not catfishing them, so be ready for that request and have extra photo’s you can send that aren’t on your profile (I usually send one cute selfie and a second full body pic in a nice outfit.) Please note: Snapchat ‘puppy’ filter selfies are not appropriate to send as an additional selfie, maybe once you’ve met him a few times, but not prior to a first meet. You’re already younger than him, there is no need to make yourself seem even younger.                         - He asks you questions of a sexual nature (ie: your favorite position, sexual history, what you’re into, kinkiest desires, etc): there is absolutely no need for tacky sexual questions, especially if you two haven’t met before. It is important to understand that yes, sugaring is based on sex, sugaring is sex work, but it’s not only sex. Sugaring is about companionship, chemistry, new experiences, and then sex. If he requires a detailed list of what you will or will not do sexually just to meet you for the first time, then he is obviously not looking for a sugar arrangement, he’s just looking for pay per play (which is fine if pay per play is what you’re looking for, each sugar baby is entitled to her own wants and desires out of an arrangement).                ‣ Tip:                        - Whenever an SD asks me “what i am willing to do”, i always reply with this. It’s elegant, polite, and successfully moves the conversation to other topics.

Get as many details about him as you can - Meeting someone off the internet is always a little unnerving, especially when it’s a man twice or three times your age. To feel safer, ask for as many details from him as you can, then reverse search the information you have (ie: his phone number, email, name, etc.) to find out his address, income, family members, and other information of the sort. The same goes with photo’s, reverse search them to find out company info, criminal history, and if he’s on any other sites (this helps cross-check age, location, and other facts he has listed on his profile).

Choose an identity and stick to it - Think about the type of person you want to convey (ie: the struggling but motivated university student, the driven twenty-something, the educated single mother, the urban socialite, etc) and build yourself up around that image. If you don’t feel comfortable using your real name with POT’s, use a fake name. Invent fake facts and stories or recall certain facts and stories from your life that correspond to the type of person you want to be. Remember, the more you have, the better. Most POT’s will ask you to some extent, some more than others, about you (ie: your job, your likes/dislikes, your upbringing, your dreams/aspirations, your background, your parents/their occupation, etc) and you will need to be prepared to answer. On the other hand, be prepped with questions to ask him, this date is about getting to know each other, it’s a waste of time if you leave knowing nothing about him.               ‣ Tip:                        - If you’re struggling with coming up with questions, check out this and this, there’s a large variety of questions that you could use.

Make sure he understands that absolutely nothing sexual will happen on this date - There should be no sex on a first date, absolutely nothing sexual. If your POT believes that coffee/lunch/dinner/drinks and a hundred dollars should equal sex in the hotel down the block, then you leave him right there and then. We are ladies looking for gentlemen with the means to provide for us and support us. If he’s only interested in sex in exchange for money, then he’s looking for an escort, not a sugar baby. (Note: if sex in exchange for money is what you’re looking for, then go right ahead and make that cash, every girl is allowed to make her own choices!)

Agree to meet in a PUBLIC place - Always meet for the first time in a public place (A restaurant, coffee shop, bar, hotel lounge/lobby, etc) because your safety and comfort comes first! If he invites you up to his hotel room for a drink, decline by saying that is something you would love to do sometime, but would feel better meeting in a public space first. If you starts arguing or does not agree to this, drop him. You don’t need to waste your time on an asshole like him.               ‣ Additionally:                        - Have your own transportation to and from your meet! Do not get into his car thinking you’ll save a little cash, even if he was kind and definitely legitimate! Personally: I don’t let POT’s get me an Uber home either, I don’t feel comfortable with them knowing my exact address.

Ask for a gift - While this isn’t something that is necessary to do, it’s something that I do. If you’re aiming for a gift, make sure to ask after you have made plans to meet or at least a day before you meet, this gives the POT time to either go shopping for you or go to an ATM for some cash. If you’re aiming for travel compensation, then feel free to ask a few hours before or even during the date, travel compensation is something usually all POT’s will agree to. This or this are the ways I use to ask, either one usually work flawlessly.              ‣  Keep in mind                      - It is not a red flag if he declines to bring you a gift! At this point in your relationship, he owes you just as much as you owe him, which is nothing. If he declines, just say that’s it’s okay and then (if you still want a little cash) try the travel compensation method.

Text to confirm - One of the worst things is dolling yourself up and then coming out to meet, only to find that your POT actually couldn’t make it. That’s why it’s important to confirm your meeting a few hours before in a quick little text.

Stay SAFE - Safety has always and will always be the number one thing in the sugar bowl which is why you need to make sure you have at least one person who know’s who you’re meeting, where, and when. If you don’t feel comfortable telling anyone you know in real life, message me and I will gladly be your safety contact. In addition to having a safety contact, it is always a good idea to carry around a bottle of mace with you, for creepy POT’s and creepy men in general.

During Your Meet

Make an entrance - Often,the first part of the conversation happens before you open your mouth, sometimes it happens before you’ve even laid eyes on them. When you enter any room, have your head up and your shoulders down. Don’t strut, but walk gracefully, swaying your hips gently, you can even look up videos of models on catwalks and learn how to walk like they do. Be dramatic, walk like you’re the center of attention - you’re a sugar baby: you’re young, stunning, and seductive. Pause in the entrance and survey the room slowly, let your eyes to travel from one side of the room to the other, until you locate your POT. It may sound a little silly, but a proper entrance will captivate anyone, especially your POT. Knowing how to walk properly and make an entrance is useful in practically every aspect of your life, not just in sugaring. 

Keep the focus on them - I’ve noticed that POT’s (and SD’s in general really) love to talk about themselves, some SB’s will even go as far as to say that these men don’t care about the things you say unless it directly relates to them (in my experience this isn’t always true, it depends on the man). Try to find a way to refocus the conversation about him, you will easily become his favorite person to speak to.             ‣ Additionally:                      - If he shows pride, you give praise. If he says something, then pauses, and looks at you significantly, he’s waiting for the applause. Be there to give it to him. You don’t even have to think what he did was impressive. You just have to be there ready to dispense a pat on the back  Do not be over dramatic, smile, look impressed, and stroke his ego.

Pay attention when he speaks - Be engaged in the conversation: ask questions to further your understanding of the topic, make comments to indicate that you are paying attention, laugh a little to signal that you are having fun, smile to show that you enjoy being in his company, and make eye contact! If you look a person in the eye, it signals that you not only hear what they’re saying but are interested in it. If you have to look away do it slowly, this reinforces your interest and enjoyment of what you’re hearing.

Don’t fidget - It ruins your credibility. Often, stillness is compared with integrity. Those that can look someone in the eye and sit still are usually believed over those that try to say something while squirming in their seat. It’s important to have good posture as well, don’t slump in your seat and if you do, catch yourself and correct your posture.             ‣  Don’t worry:                     - Your hair looks fine, your clothing fits you well, and your phone will not explode if you don’t check it for an hour. Your main focus should be your POT, not the little things about your appearance.

Relax - You might be a little nervous over the first date, but chances are, he probably is too! Some SD’s are nervous the first time meeting, this might be due to the fact that you’re much younger than he is or he might be downright intimidated because of your looks. Your job is to make him feel at ease and the easiest way to help him feel at ease is to be at ease yourself. People play off each other’s energies and your body language speaks volumes, so try your best to just relax.

End on a good note - End the date with a hug or a handshake (or a kiss on the cheek, if you like him), something physical so that you touch and it leaves him wanting a little more. If you went out for lunch/dinner, tell him how thankful you are for taking you out, how much you loved the food, and how he has great taste in restaurants. 

After Your Meet

Assessing him - A person’s appearance and demeanor speaks volumes about them. Observe not his wallet, his cufflinks, or his shoes, but his mannerisms, his eloquence, and his overall conduct. Many good sugar daddies may not look the part, but they will act it. There’s no forcing chemistry, so it’s best to figure that out right away before delving deeper.               ‣ Questions to think about:                      - Does he ask you first what you want to eat?                      - Is he interested in what you’re saying?                      - How does he talk about his family, his employees?                      - Is he nice to the waitstaff?                      - How much is he tipping?                      - Were your personalities compatible?                      - Did you have a lot in common?                      - Was it easy to hold a conversation with him, or were there awkward silences?                      - Is this someone you’d be comfortable being seen in public with, going on vacations with, and generally spending time with?

Send a follow up text - If the date went well, shortly after you meet (a few hours or a day, at most), send the POT/SD a text saying that it was a pleasure meeting him and you’d love to see him again. When (or if) he responds, you might be able to schedule your next date!

Think about your loses - If the date didn’t go so well, you got a free coffee/lunch/dinner/gift. If your POT contacts you and asks you out again, decline politely and wish him luck finding what he’s looking for.

Allowance Talk - Yes Or No?

There’s a lot of disagreement on whether or not you should speak about allowance with your POT on a first date. I’ve had POT’s bring up numbers over text/on the phone/email (prior to meeting and after meeting) and during coffee/lunch/dinner/drinks. In my opinion, let him bring up the allowance talk.

If he does, express your desires concerning allowances, gifts, and how the arrangement will work. Most arrangements end due to schedule conflicts and misunderstanding expectations, be clear about what you want. 

If he doesn’t, that’s completely fine too. You’ll most likely speak about it on your second date or over some electronic format.

If you touch on the subject but you notice he’s not too keen on delving into it at the moment, leave it alone. This sends your POT the message that you’re more interested in a suitable arrangement than the money, as well as that you are nowhere near desperate and while you are interested in him, not overly so. This lack of overt interest gives you more control of the relationship from the get-go. It also shows that he cannot control you or gain your interest with his money alone. This makes it easier for you to discuss the terms of the relationship, set boundaries, and negotiate your allowance later on.

What to Wear

Men are visual creatures, they love eye-catching arm candy, but most prefer elegance or casual classy to outright flashy. However, showing all your goods on the first meeting is not a good idea. Choose one thing to show off, this leaves his imagining and wanting more. Keep in mind where you’re meeting, as well. There’s no need to go all out if you’re just meeting for coffee.

If you’re meeting for coffee - Jeans and a pretty blouse will be just fine, top it off with flats or boots and you’ll be good to go. If it’s warmer out, a sundress is perfectly acceptable too.             ‣  Keep in mind                     - Meeting a POT for the first time in shorts is not appropriate, there is no need to play up the age difference between the two of you, even if it is hot outside.

If you’re meeting for lunch/dinner/drinks - A formfitting dress will do you good, especially if it’s dinner or drinks. Complete the look with a nice pair of heels and some jewelry, if you’re having trouble figuring out which jewelry to wear with what, check out this!

Makeup - Keep the makeup light and natural, opt for neutral colors rather than darker ones. Get your nails done, fill in your brows, foundation, mascara, light colored eye shadow, and lipstick/lip-gloss is all you’ll need. I prefer to top up my look with a slightly red nude lip (since my lips are full and the color makes them pop more), even though most SB’s suggest to stay away from all red’s.

So there you have it dolls, an ultimate guide to POT dates. Feel free to add on your own tips! Keep sugaring, dolly xoxo

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Hi Bronzy! I hope you're having a lovely day. I'm getting ready to go out and meet my very first POT later this week, and I am a little nervous. Do you have any tips on dealing with this? Thank you, beautiful!

Hi Darling, 

Well done for getting your first POT date. I’ve dealt with a similar issue before so if you haven’t already read it, you can read it here. You can also find my post on Body Language (which plays a big part in confidence) here.

In addition to that, it’s natural to feel nervous about your first date. I’ve found through experience that the more dates you go on, the better you get at it and the less nervous you feel. So don’t see this date as the do all and end all. See it simply as a stepping stone, a way for you to practice all the tactics you’ve read and hone your dating skills.

When you need a quick confidence boost before a date/freestyle/event, here’s what to do.

Listen to Uplifting Music

Don’t underestimate the power music has on your mentality. In Baje Fletcher’s Book “A Gold Diggers Guide” she discusses the topic of  how playing certain music around men can send them subliminal messages to spend more money on you (e.g T.I “Whatever You Like”). Well this can be flipped. Use this tactic on yourself to send those moodlifting vibes to your brain. When I’m angry, upset, or just need to get myself in the “boss bitch” mentality I have a few playlists that I always play. Play them in the shower, on your way to your date, when you’re getting ready … basically at whatever point you feel you can listen to the music and still get something done.

My favourite Spotify Playlists are 

Getting Ready (my own SB playlist)

Sugar Baby Party (my own SB playlist)

Mood Booster

100 Most Uplifting Songs Ever

Who Run The World? Girls!

Greatest Motivational Songs Ever

You can also follow me here on Spotify where you can find my other SB playlists.

Pamper Yourself

It’s undeniable that feeling you get when you’ve just come home from a day at the spa. If you can’t get yourself to a spa, recreate that feeling at home. Fill Up the bathtub with warm water, drop in your favourite bath bombs, slap on that face mask, dim the lights, light some candles, pick out an audio book, ( I suggest “Get The Guy” by Matthew Hussey) and sit back and relax. I’m a Lush fanic, so I’ll include my favourite pamper products below.

CupCake Face Mask

This shit is chocolate heaven and really great if you have oily skin. It contains cocoa powder, fresh mint and cocoa butter to name just a few ingredients. I like to apply this once a week or whenever I need some TLC. It also contains chocolate chips and smells a lot like chocolate, it is not edible!

Rub Rub Rub (Shower Scrub)

My favourite body scrub simply for the fact that it’s packed full with coarse sea salt. You can use this multiple ways: add it to your hair for volume and shine. Apply it onto wet skin for a gentle scrub. My favourite way is to use it on dry skin and rub in circular motions (don’t go to hard or you will scratch your skin). Particularly focus on areas your would like to be baby smooth, like your breast, but, legs etc. This salt scrub has a non invasive scent and contains organic lemon juice and lemon oil to make you feel oh so good.

Charity Pot (Ha and and Body Lotion)

After that intense body scrub your skin will need to be zapped back with moisture. This cream is cream uses fair trade olive oil, organic jojoba oil and Colombian cocoa butter to give your skin a re-boost and gift it with some generous moisture. This is one of my favourite Lush products because of the name. This product supports organisations that align with ethics in human rights, environmental conservation and animal welfare. 100% of the price is donated to these organisations, putting lush in my good books for years to come.

Watch Ted Talks

This might sound like an odd one but there are a bunch of great Ted Talks that focus on the area of personal development. My favourite Ted Talk by social psychologist Amy Cuddy delves into how body language not only shapes how others see us, but how it influences our feel good hormones. She teaches us how standing in a posture of confidence, even when we don’t feel confident — can affect testosterone and cortisol levels in the brain, and might even have an impact on our chances for success.It’s really worth a watch even if your confidence is 10/10.

Some videos that might be of interest to you …

Your Body language Shapes Who You Are (Amy Cuddy)

The Power of Seduction in Our Everyday Lives (Chen Lizra)

The Power is in the Palm of Your Hands (Allan Pease)

Love Your Body™ 10 Ways to BOOST your Confidence 

How to Build Self Confidence (Michelle Phan)

I hope this helps give you a quick confidence boost. If you ever feel discouraged don’t fret to come back here and reference this post.

But don’t forget, this is just a boost, a quick fix. You need to always be working on the confidence within you, so that even without all these extra things you are still a strong person at heart. If you haven’t read my Model for Confidence Post you can find it here. I discuss how confidence is formed of multiple layers and the different factors that you can combine to make you a stronger person.

I hope you have a great date.

xxxxx

BronzedSugarUK

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1 Sentence, 7 different ways.

I’m guilty of frequently using this line, “What are your expectations in an arrangement?”

So today, I stopped for a minute to think about different ways that we could ask this same question, but without repeating ourselves. We all want to stand out from the crowd, and it honestly does get boring when they (or we) ask the same question over and over!

Instead of asking them “What are your expectations”, you could easily change it up and say something like:

1) Provision - The action of providing or supplying something for use.

“I’m considering your offer. However before I can fully agree, could you tell me if there are any (other) provisions that I should know about?”

2) Stipulation - A condition or requirement that is specified or demanded as part of an agreement.

“I’d love to know what your stipulations are in an arrangement?”

3) Prerequisite - A thing that is required as a prior condition for something else to happen or exist.

“Do you have any prerequisites in order for me to earn my allowance in full every month?”

4) Essential - Absolutely necessary; extremely important.

“Can you give me more details on what is essential for you, in order to consider an arrangement with me?”

5) Imperative - Of vital importance; crucial.

“When I am in an arrangement, it’s imperative that my SD is respectful, supportive, has patience and can commit to seeing me at least once a week. What is imperative for you?”

6) Indispensable - Absolutely necessary.

“What are some things that you would consider to be indispensable aspects to a healthy SB/SD relationship?”

7) Compulsory - Required by law or a rule; obligatory.

“Is there anything that is compulsory, in order to make/keep you happy as an SD?”

These are all ways to ask the same question, without being boring! It’s good to try new things sometimes, and you just never know if someone has been asked the same question a hundred times! The more little tricks that have and that you can use to help you secure an SD, the better ;)

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Asking for an “allownce”

*Disclaimer* This is my own experience/advice

I see a lot of girls asking whether to discuss an allowance before or after the first date and honestly, I prefer to do it before and here are my reasons why:

1) I don’t want to get all dolled up for a date face beat, hair laid, ready to snatch ppl’s fucking life just to find out he can only provide me with an amount that’s insufficient to my lifestyle

2) I’m not afraid of “scaring him off” because he knows I’m obviously attracted to his money and not him primarily.

3) If you don’t like the range or financial amount he’s proposed you can always stick it out and wait to see if he changes his mind after you meet or just never meet with him all together. ON TO THE NEXT LOL.

4) I’ve found that when I do this its less awkward during the date because we can focus on getting to know each other and all that bullshit

****Random tip*****

I find that sometimes the word “allowance” makes these men very uncomfortable. So sometimes instead I would say “What amount/range would you feel comfortable with, in terms of cash and gifts (or you can say spoiling me with)?”

At the end of the day, you just go with whatever feels right for you and your situation. Obviously, if you’re going more for the spoiled gf route you probably wouldn’t mention this immediately because you would want the relationship to seem more genuine. But, if you’re going for the straight up SD route this could work.

Hope this kind of helped someone :)

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Lap Bull Calf via http://ift.tt/1SaIqRH putyouinabettermood.com

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Strawberry Sheet Cake, you can easily make it gluten free! | Via Noshtastic

Really nice recipes. Every hour.

Show me what you cooked!

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friendly reminder that wheelchairs, canes, crutches, mobility scooters, walkers, etc. are not part of a dichotomy between being able to walk and unable to walk. there are a wide variety of reasons to use a mobility aid, all of which are valid.

ultimately, mobility aids are about ease of mobility, level of comfort, safety, and freedom. not about walking/not walking.

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ahhh yes I love those moments of doubt when you wonder if the abuse is even real or if you're just overreacting and being a whiny pissbaby

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hey so can we stop assuming all people with schizophrenia are violent? thanks…