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AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

FINALLY JARRY REUNION MY PARENTS ARE BACK IM NO LONGER A CHILD OF DIVORCE

THEY'RE MATCHING TOOO OH MY FUCKIN GODOOOOKOOOANANQJAJAJAJ!!!!!

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Update update update !!!!

It has more Felix overthinking thoughts and Catton training lore !!

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Update update update !!!!

It has more Felix overthinking thoughts and Catton training lore !!

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no but it really does get to me how tenderly shitty benson feels in response to randy breaking down over the harm he caused as a seven year old that, while it did cause some life-altering damage, was an accident. he watches how randy feels so horrible fourteen years on, two-thirds of his entire life on, that he's completely locked himself up and ensures every step and word out of his mouth can't possibly cause harm to others, no matter how much harm it may bring upon himself. all over an accident he caused as a child.

meanwhile, the irreparable damage done to benson was enacted on by an adult on purpose, and he knows that man doesn't lose sleep over it like randy loses sleep, doesn't shed a single solitary fucking tear over it like randy does, never altered his mindset or second-guesses anything he ever does or will do in the ways randy obsesses over it. and i think, even though he finds randy's admission of profound guilt a little exasperating because it appears to him to be a wild overreaction, it gives benson pause that someone has the capacity for feeling so terrible over causing harm. he had never been granted that same reaction for the purposeful harm done to him, had never been offered any acknowledgement that he had ever been harmed in the first place. has pushed past any guilt for the harm he's caused by his own hand, and has never offered any apologies, either -- that is, until he hurts randy by accident. he never apologizes for the harm he enacts upon randy on purpose. never apologizes for the harm he causes to assert dominance and control. but he apologizes through tears for hurting randy by accident.

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eucalyptus man it appears i have grown quite fond of you ..

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Chapter update !!!!

Messy drunk felix is something so personal to me truly

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Chapter update !!!!

Messy drunk felix is something so personal to me truly

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reminder that this version of johnny's headshot exists and is enough to make me clinically insane lol

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the passenger - obsessed

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the passenger quite literally is a "i can fix him" story

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Randy

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Oh you give author comment?? You give author little kudos on their fic?? LOVE FOR READER!! LOVE FOR READER FOR ONE MILLION YEARS!!

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An update !!! A little shorter but full of Felix’s never-ending justifications as to why he is DEFINITELY NOT being weirdly possessive about his new boy bestie

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i'm still unemployed for another day and a half

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An update !!! A little shorter but full of Felix’s never-ending justifications as to why he is DEFINITELY NOT being weirdly possessive about his new boy bestie

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The way I'm completely desperate to know absolutely EVERYTHING about how, when, and why, Art got injured in 2018.

Was it during a big match? Or practice? Was he simply distracted? Or angry? Had he just had an argument with Tashi, so he was unfocused and emotional? Or was it just a freak accident? He's got several scars all over his shoulder and elbow, so it must have been quite significant. He must have thought his career was over right then and there.

Seeing Tashi's reaction to this would have been so gratifying as well, like. She was totally having war flashbacks. PTSD fully triggered. Did she cry? Did she scream? Was she trying her best to remain calm, but failing spectacularly? Art is her life's work, her second body. She lost tennis once and it destroyed her. She couldn't possibly lose Art too, she couldn't lose tennis again.

And where was Patrick? We know he's a certified yearner, so. Was he perhaps in the audience, watching the match? Or was he watching it live on TV? Did he only learn about it while scrolling the Art Donaldson hashtag on Twitter? Did he freak out? Did he try to visit them at the hospital? He wasn't there for Tashi when she got injured, which he regrets deeply. So he couldn't allow himself to NOT be there for Art, right? So what if he did try to visit, but access was restricted to friends and family. Patrick is neither of those things, not anymore. He couldn't be there, again.

But I just know that, as Art was lying on that hospital bed, disoriented, terrified and delirious from painkillers, the first thing he said to Tashi as she walked into the room was a mantra of "I'm sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry ".