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stayed down

they like to tell you you should stop and smell the roses

easy when you say it, not so much to set in motion

cuz seldom do you know when here and now's a special moment

out of all my memories ones i had with you are held the closest

2008, summer saratoga

there aint noone i'd replace if i rewound the date

i'd live it out the same, wouldn't change nothin

i reminisce about them days they run around the brain

now it ain't the same, fallin in and out of touch

i try to picture all the moments but they're clouding up

if a picture's worth a thousand words

we'd be runnin outta pages you'll never be out of frame

that's the gang gang gang that's the family

my brother's gettin married now i got a bigger family

i got another sister that i'm adding to the picture

murph and courtney got a baby on the way it just gets richer

i count my blessings even tho i got a lot

sometimes i dip to darker places but they pull me out

family and my music and my friends are all i got

so when i search for inner peace these are the things i think about

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So @bhphoto shared this photo by @karl_shakur, but I am obsessed with it too, so here it is for you. #liveauthentic …I don’t know the location (at Somewhere On Earth)

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Winter leaves 2

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Instagram | Youtube

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Erosion

I appreciate everyone.

I do a lot of things with the hopes that people appreciate me, too. That's a flaw that I acknowledge. A lot of artists suffer from this. We think we're the shit. We ain't shit without everyone we come into contact with, and neither are you. That's both ironic and beautiful.

I've been thinking about purpose a bit lately. Or, more than usual, since it's always given me anxiety. But I've been thinking selfishly. I've had thoughts of giving up showing people music that I make because of thoughts that people may think I'm narcissistic or self-centered. These thoughts stem out of anxiety of not becoming "famous" off of what I've made. Even though that wasn't the reason I started making music in the first place.

It's been dominating my thoughts lately. I constantly make music because I HAVE TO. I don't have to put songs out for the public to hear but I do it now because I make a part-time job's worth of money off of it and I like the way it feels when I know people like it... But that could never compare to the way it makes me feel when I make it.

I always think I'm going to stop putting music out for the public to hear but I'm never going to stop making it because I just HAVE TO MAKE MUSIC. Then I check myself cuz I think every artist that has achieved any sort of clout has a responsibility to serve. I've always said, "trust your artistic instinct." And how selfish would it be to stop giving anyone something that they perceive as having value?

I'm going to make music until I die. My stuff is more nuanced than it's ever been, and it's only going to get more deep. That's natural.

I'm going to say something that seems cliche, and it's always something that a bitter artist says, but I can honestly tell you I'm not coming from a bitter place when I say, "I don't care what anyone thinks."

I'm just a speckle, but I have a responsibility. As small as it may be. So I'll keep spilling like I have nothing to hide. We're in this together.

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Winter leaves

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In brighter Times by Jerdess

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#rp @staybest | come chill with me all day Sunday from 2-7 at @scribnerslodge. I’ll play you a song. (at Scribner's Catskill Lodge)

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(Cole King)