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epicsingles replied to your post:epicsingles replied to your post:PSAI DONT LIKE...

being reminded that hyped up senses=hyped up farts

i’m so sorry.....

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Oof, I haven’t even thought of living that long.  I kind of... Stay in the present.  But I mean if I get to 150 and get bored I’m sure there are easy ways to die again! 

That’s true!  Perspective it is…  Out of curiosity, how long do fauns usually live?

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caindycane replied to your post:caindycane replied to your post:PSAi agree with...

its necessary bur it sucks much like breathing

YEAH LIKE.. WHAT THE FUCK BREATHING IS BULLSHIT??

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epicsingles replied to your post:PSA

I DONT LIKE HTIS

farts or me asking everyone to stop farting

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caindycane replied to your post:PSA

i agree with this i have amplified senses and it just hurts

it BURNS... literally!!  why did whatever higher being there is invent farting??? i feel like that wasn’t necessary

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PSA

Please stop farting so much it smells Awful why do college people fart so much please ... pleas

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ignore

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NO!  THAT ISN’T WHAT I’M SAYING!  Well.  I don’t know.  I didn’t think much of it...  I don’t... Really care about.. humanity.  I mean I care but...  Yikes, okay that sounds AWFUL out loud.  Alright, you are definitely right I am awful. But!  We all die anyway...  Most of us.  Death is coming.  Most humans really revere a God and believe in an Heaven so maybe I did them a service by sending them to a better place! ... I’m not helping myself, I am definitely a piece of shit for murdering people.

Right, okay.  I’ll try to remember that.

You just killed a few people and you’re blaming it on not really understanding them? That’s really bold for a vampire to say. Humans would be glad to see your kind, which, as you know, includes me, wiped off the face of the planet because they don’t “understand” you.

…Anyways, yeah. You just buy it… There are cultures that use it in their meals. Oooor you could just, like, buy it at a store for vampires, as dangerous as that is. That’s what I do.

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Maybe!  But... Hm, I don’t really... Feel dead?  Like I still have a heartbeat and blood still definitely runs through me.  And I still have to eat!  My diet is kind of... A lot different now and I only really need one thing but...  I still do a lot of living human things now that I think about it... This is confusing.. Is “undead” a better term for it?

Oh, wow that’s really interesting, I didn’t know that!  Actually, honestly, up until a few seconds ago I didn’t even know ghosts were actually a thing that was real so… Please excuse that-  It’d be interesting to see if I could see you in the mirror, since we’ve technically established that I’m dead…

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That’s true!  Perspective it is...  Out of curiosity, how long do fauns usually live?

I…. Guess you’re right?  I never really saw things that way and there’s probably some flaw to that logic but I can’t think of any counterarguments for that…  I feel like 1000 is pretty old.  I’m not actually sure though, I’m technically a baby still and when I was a 4 year old human, I thought 20 years old was ancient.

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Woops, my bad, sorry about that.

Are there places to “buy” blood or do I... steal it?  Ah, I don’t have the luxury of vampire parents, but wouldn’t that be kind of nice to have at this point [laughs awkwardly].  Not to pull a “I wasn’t like other humans” but even when I was a human I never really understood them.  I guess why that’s probably why I’m not all that angsty about having killed..... A few of them by accident.

S..Stop shouting. We have sensitive ears, and you’re hurting mine.

…Just don’t get hungry. Drink blood regularly, and you won’t need to attack people. If you’ve been a vampire for a longer amount of time, it’s way easier to control, and you can eat less… I’ve never had an issue, my parents trained me well. I have no idea why, though, I’ll never understand their sympathy towards humans…

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OH JEEZ, I DIDN’T KNOW I WAS BREAKING ANY LAWS!!  I’M SO SORRY, GOD, I DON’T KNOW A THING DO I?  BUT THAT MAKES SENSE B-BECAUSE HUMANS CAN’T KILL EACH OTHER, WHY SHOULD NONHUMANS BE ABLE TO?!

Holy shit, I’m a criminal.  I don’t even mean it, honestly, I just get so hungry and.... Then I....  Yeah.........  How do you control cravings and random blackouts, again?

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Yeah, I’m only about 2 years old as a vampire….  Are we the same?  I really hope not, you seem to know more than I do!

Ooh, wow that’s interesting!  I had no idea one wouldn’t know about being a vampire if they were born that way…  Pig’s Blood Cakes?  That sounds…. Honestly disgusting- truthfully, so does drinking human blood but that’s actually delicious so I really shouldn’t judge at this point.  Ah, thank you!  

… …You’re right! It does taste… good, but because of the law we musn’t hurt humans in order to ensure our survival. Humans are not only strong, they’re empathetic. They’ll hunt us down if you keep doing that. But… there are actually a lot of meals made for humans that contain pig’s blood. They don’t taste good, but they keep you looking good, at least…

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Right, I haven’t- to either of those things.  On the first day at this university I saw more supernatural beings than I did ever before in my life.  Humm...  That doesn’t seem right...  Aren’t you more likely to cause harm if you don’t know something will actually hurt someone else or not?

Oooooh, this is for pranking… Hm…  I really don’t know the answer to that question, truthfully.  I’ve never actually been around garlic because I don’t really cook anymore and I’ve never used garlic much.  What kind of Italian am I, honestly?  As for the silver thing, I’m not a werewolf so… I’m not sure.

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I.... Guess you’re right?  I never really saw things that way and there’s probably some flaw to that logic but I can’t think of any counterarguments for that...  I feel like 1000 is pretty old.  I’m not actually sure though, I’m technically a baby still and when I was a 4 year old human, I thought 20 years old was ancient.

At my old university there weren’t any real parties thrown until a few weeks in.  I mean there were a few to kick things off but most of them got going when people were over the “I’m gonna do great this semester!” hype.

Isn’t 200 supposed to be young in vampire years?  I hope I don’t get crotchety when I get to be 200…

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Oooooh, this is for pranking... Hm...  I really don’t know the answer to that question, truthfully.  I’ve never actually been around garlic because I don’t really cook anymore and I’ve never used garlic much.  What kind of Italian am I, honestly?  As for the silver thing, I’m not a werewolf so... I’m not sure.

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At my old university there weren’t any real parties thrown until a few weeks in.  I mean there were a few to kick things off but most of them got going when people were over the “I’m gonna do great this semester!” hype.

Isn’t 200 supposed to be young in vampire years?  I hope I don’t get crotchety when I get to be 200...

so, we’ve been in these dorms for…however long…and no one’s thrown any crazy parties yet? doesn’t anyone know how to have fun?

okay. stupid question. obviously vampires and shit don’t know how to have fun if they’ve been dead for 200 years. i’m attending college in a nursing home

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I’ve never actually tried it myself but according to the internet we will melt or die or something like that.  But garlic stinks anyways...  Even when I was a human I thought it was gross, now the smell is 100 times worse.

does anything bad actually happen when vampires are exposed to garlic i need to know for research