consumemyhat-blog
Consume My Hat You Lazy Fool
Here to give and receive advice about how to t❤️
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when was the last time you used a sticky note for something useful
exactly. you’re wasting money. unless you’re using them for something fun like making them into those little darts that you impale the ceiling if your math class with
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eat doritos shirtless in your bed while watching the office
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making my way down slown (slug town), walking slast (slug fast), faces pass and i’m home slound (slug bound)
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janice what the fuck are you supposed to call it? george? what the fuck kind of name for your spawn is “george”
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are avacados good fats or are they really just a vent
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remember that cartoon that your english teacher probably showed you at some point called pendamonium? send me link please???
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it’s a gift from eily
Chloe
your eyelid looks as veiny as the tangerine peel on your plate
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if you can’t handle me at my worse then you sure as hell can’t handle me when i’m covered in grape jelly because i’m too slippery
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Chloe
your eyelid looks as veiny as the tangerine peel on your plate
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if only that was the case. while i have you here, can i talk to you about the portal in the library leading to the alternate demension where everything is normal but all of our dragons have dog ears
Look, sometimes murders of crows will blacken the sky at your coming and ravening wolves are gonna follow in your wake, and you’re just gonna have to deal with that, and everybody else in the Costco is just gonna have to deal too
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