courtofthorpe

[courtofthorpe]

its for your own good my dude alums like an akita that can spit acid and fly

nick could you come pick up your batch so that kartchner stops trying to heistcam me for his tiktok stream or whatever

[courtofthorpe]

walkerdreamer99 replied to your post “al-uqdah replied to your post “nick could you come pick up your batch...”

it's been like 2 days em how was i to know you were under threat of base thievery

because if this were like 15 years ago youd be trying the exact same shit

[courtofthorpe]

al-uqdah replied to your post “nick could you come pick up your batch so that kartchner stops trying...”

Emery I am so sorry. I will speak with Cameron.

dont punish cameron for experiencing simple zest for life

im out to punish walker for neglecting his civic duty to come pick up his weed

[courtofthorpe]

nick could you come pick up your batch so that kartchner stops trying to heistcam me for his tiktok stream or whatever

[courtofthorpe]

smdh what a missed opportunity to say beesiness

hey fuck u thiren people come to this town for our shop too

[courtofthorpe]

small town just like me

Occupation: greenhouse/nursery owner

Friends: everyone

Acquaintances: all

Friendly rivals with/polite disdain for: no one em is chilling

How long has your kid had their own shop?: 7-8 years

Your kid’s favourite thing about their work?: raising tricky or non-native plants

Your kid’s favourite things to do around the small town?: eat ice cream, hang out at the park and sketch

How old do you want to be in this universe (no need to line up with the others!): old enough to be shitty about it to everyone

What’s your kid’s favourite food?: oreos

What’s your kid’s favourite weather?: springtime, light rain

If your kid had to have a booth at a farmer’s market, what would they sell?: froots and vemgtables and herbs

What does your kid’s shop look like (if they have one)?: bigass greenhouse with a sort of small curtained-off shopfront, outdoor garden beds all around

What does their home look like?: tiny three-room cottage off the back of the greenhouse

Live with anyone?: alum

What’s their Wholesome Small Town style?: they accept barter instead of payment and give small gifts (homemade teas or spice mixes or Remedies) when they visit and always send u away with a lil extra when you buy stuff from them

Any locations you want to ensure we have in the town? park, river, ye olde ice creame / candy shoppe

What’s the Magic Powers situation lookin like? Full powers, toned down, none, etc?: extremely handy with plants and animals, pointy ears and when u look at them sideways their limbs look a little too long? always seems to turn up when they’re needed most, always knows when you’re lying, can’t lie themself, has a pet dragon

Any desired backstory?: used to be homeless

[courtofthorpe]

how many times do we have to teach you this lesson, old man?

Do we not have a local horse expert quite literally in the chat to solve this? Or is it about starting a ruckus?

[courtofthorpe]

it’s about tormenting nick

Do we not have a local horse expert quite literally in the chat to solve this? Or is it about starting a ruckus?

[courtofthorpe]

that’s almost universally true about anything

theres an adventure time episode about this

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al-uqdah replied to your post: al-uqdah replied to your post: …

Horses don’t have hands with which to brush their teeth.

can you fucking imagine.  can you imagine.  you expect the clip clop of hooves but theres just a soft patter and you look down and theres human hands at the end of their long spindly legs.  can you fucking imagine.

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hockey players don’t have poor dental hygiene, they just get their teeth knocked out constantly. plebian.

al-uqdah replied to your post: al-uqdah replied to your post: …

No they do not. They have horse teeth.

i forget what i was going to say because im just so horrified by his dental hygiene.  ive made out with hockey players with better teeth than this.

[courtofthorpe]

i know for a FACT you’ve called those books classics before

al-uqdah replied to your post: al-uqdah replied to your post: …

Out of respect for the greatest shame of your childhood, I shall refrain from making a Twilight joke about how lovely it is to watch you sleep.

the only shame here is the global shame of the phenomenon those godforsaken wads of printed toilet paper caused.  but thanks honey