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[crazybirbhooman]

Realistic Scara Reverse Isekai Headcanons

In my Scara brainrot era

Reverse isekai AU, except realistic

Author's Note: I was really thinking about this one for a few days and then stumbled upon quite a few reverse isekai Scara fics, and yes, they were all really good, but personally I think realistically, things would go a lot differently. A bit self-indulgent so I’m using my workplace (hostess at a nice restaurant) for the main setting/ place of employment in these headcanons. Also, because while I was brainstorming, I couldn’t really think of a better natural way for Scaramouche to make an appearance that doesn’t involve him falling out of the sky or just appearing out of nowhere.

Version 3.3 archon quest spoilers

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Imagine walking into work through the front door, maybe you’re a few minutes late, but definitely arriving right in the middle of this whole ordeal of a strangely dressed man with a large hat arguing with your coworkers.

As the genshin fan you are, you could obviously tell the man was dressed as Scaramouche (in his wanderer era)

Finding it a little out of place for someone to be visiting a nice restaurant dressed in such a way you assumed that maybe he was coming back from a con nearby you didn’t know about.

But oh, his cosplay looks really good, almost like the character really stepped out of the game (little do you know) so of course you must compliment him! “Oh! Sir! I really like your Scaramouche cosplay!”

What a mistake that was, you’re lucky he’s the wanderer now.

He’d probably jolt over to facing you with his signature glare painting his face, how did you know who he was? How did you know his old name? didn’t he erase his existence from Irminsul? Were you working for Dottore and the fatui? And what did you mean buy cosplay?

Luckily, he refrains himself from using violence to question you on the spot, “How does a pathetic mortal like you know my name?” would be his first question

Of course, you’d be met with an irritated sign when you tilt your head to the side in confusion, followed by your puzzled expression at his behavior.

“Forget it, I just need to buy some food what food can I get in this shabby little place for under 500 mora” for some reason ever since he woke up here, he’s been hungry?

Well of course he’s hungry, living puppets don’t exactly exist here meaning Scaramouche has become a human now!

At this point you’d probably start looking for hidden cameras or wondering if this guy is just really committed to being in character. “Sorry sir, but mora isn’t a real form of money, I can let you look at the menu if you’d like to see our prices.”

Scaramouche was not amused and neither were you, the both of you probably went back and forth at each other for a solid 5 minutes before you asked him to step outside as he was disturbing customers, so now you stand outside with Scaramouche still trying to get it through to him that he should really stop trying to act so in character and that although his acting skills were very convincing, you knew better and knew there was no way a fictional character could be real(or so you thought)

You probably thought this man might be crazy, maybe he has some sort of unresolved mental problems? Where did he even come from; he didn’t even seem to have any mode of transportation with him? You were super close to getting your coworkers to call the police since nothing you were saying was getting through to the strange man infront of you.

You might also act with caution, if this man really thought he was Scaramouche, knowing the former harbinger’s personality he could be quite dangerous.

Scaramouche however is probably the one thinking you’re quite stupid, he got you to play along and answer some of his questions and through your explanations he found out he's in a different world from his own and that here, he’s actually a character from a game (how ridiculous)

He also found out he has now become a mere human here(yay he has a heart now)and that his vision is pretty much useless here (that could really become a problem) followed by the realization this world seems to have a lot of pointless laws, what do you mean he needs a birth certificate? Social security number? He can’t just wander around and can’t even survive here without money?!

Scaramouche really doesn’t want to deal with the authorities here, he’s realized quite fast that this world is nowhere close to being like Teyvat and since he can’t even just survive by wandering around and exploring, he didn't feel like getting into trouble just yet, especially before he has his situation properly figured out.

Now instead of you trying to explain the situation to Scaramouche, he’s the one having to explain himself to you, the real question is how does he convince you that he’s none other than the former 6th harbinger and not some crazy person dressed like him?

After a lengthy conversation he finally manages to somewhat convince you he’s actually Scaramouche. You’d have to bring him back inside and buy the poor guy food, he hasn’t eaten since he ended up in your world and has no money, you’d have to think of something to tell your manager and coworkers about the situation and coming up with an excuse for him. Poor you realizing you still haven’t even been clocked in this whole time 

You’d also have to take him home with you like a lost homeless kitten, if you live at home good luck explaining everything to your family without them thinking that YOU are now the crazy one.

Good luck living with this man too, he’s a menace

Not to mention if you’re a student you’d probably be taking him to school with you, he’d have a lot of trouble surviving here without at the very least a high school diploma.

Was super happy to find out he has fans here (although questions the sanity of a few of them at times)

If you thought he was bad at home, he's an even bigger menace at school. Despite his snarky and rude remarks you somehow managed to become close friends with him! You’re also the only friend he’s got “Why would I bother to put in the effort to entertain these pathetic people” is what he’d tell you

He’d mumble out a “thank you” so quietly you almost missed it but despite his usual behavior he was grateful to you for letting him stay with you and not abandoning him like the rest even though you should’ve been the one thanking him for giving you the opportunity to house someone as great as him.

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Thank you for reading! I’m not used to writing apart from school essays, but I’ve really wanted to start properly writing for a while. I wanted to start out a bit easier with some headcanons and hopefully my next piece of writing will be an actual fic?

[crazybirbhooman]

never thought I'd be making my first genshin post on here like this but I need to share this newly discovered Childe brain rot I now have.

JROTC KID CHILDE

basically I was thinking of some modern outfit designs for the characters, which got me thinking what I think they'd do. For Childe I couldn't really think of a sport to math him except for archery, and then it dawned on me

JROTC.

I've noticed quite a few people don't know what jrotc is, so a quick explanation of the class, is it's basically a leadership class funded by the military, it stands for junior reserve officer training corps and is the highschool version of the college course ROTC

Except we're actually not very responsible unlike the title of leadership class suggests

Our shenanigans have included but are not limited to, eating crayons during a formal event, arguing over bread, the dumbest conversations you will ever witness, lots of push-ups (like we'll be out at a church volunteer and some of my classmates will get down on the ground and randomly start doing push-ups), the list goes on

BUT I THINK CHILDE WOULD FIT IN PERFECTLY

WE ALSO DO ARCHERY

SO HE'D GET PERFECT SCORES AND JUST SAY THAT HE ISN'T THAT GOOD

he'd probably end up the archery team captain

The drill team is where we do fancy marching with rifles (not real of course)

And we sometimes have to throw them/ spin them, etc.

HE'D DEFINITELY SHOW OFF INFRONT OF ALL THE FIRST YEAR CADETS

PROBABLY DROPS THE RIFLE WHILE TRYING TO SHOW OFF

when throwing it to someone else for a drill movement he's probably thrown it with too much force and accidentally hit them in the head too

gets sent to go do push-ups cause he dropped the rifle

He'd probably get lost during orienteering but somehow still make it back on time and get almost all the points

ALSO PROBABLY HAS ACCIDENTALLY SMACKED SOMEONE OVER THE HEAD WITH THE SABER FOR HONOR GUARD

basically honor guard is where we make this archway using sabers for important people to walk under during ceremonies

HOPEFULLY HE DIDN'T ACCIDENTALLY HIT SOMEONE DURING AN ACTUAL EVENT

DEFINITELY FINDS IT FUNNY WHEN PEOPLE WHO HAVE NO IDEA WHAT HONOR IS WALK THROUGH AND JUMP BACK IN FEAR WHEN THEY RAISE THE SABERS(I know I did)

He'd also definitely be on almost every team in jrotc and be really good at them all.

Also probably has a ridiculous amount of ribbons on his uniform

This temporarily concludes my jrotc Childe brain rot, thank you for coming to my Ted talk