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? Who Knows ?
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don talk about ur feelings you're just a whiney brat and nobody cares
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when it all comes down to it, i am just unhappy with myself but i think i love to take care of other people i just want someone to take care of me
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every time i bring up my anxiety, and how it's starting to get uncontrollable, you always decide to have a breakdown days later so i have to become a care giver, and out my outrageously angry thoughts on hold bc you're too fragile for them. i am sick, but it doesn't matter. i am sick but i am not allowed. I wish there was a way for me to tell you how i feel without you reacting this way. I want to tell you i'm trying really hard not to die, but i'm thinking about giving up soon. I want to tell you i think about hurting myself everyday but i can't bc i know you'd see it and then i'd be embarrassed. I think that's why i've been purging, i don't care about being skinny i just want to feel some fucking pain. I want someone to slap me i want to be hurt, my muscles are sore, but that's not what i'm talking about. I want sharp excruciating pain to course through my body, i want to rip my skin off the back of my neck, the sides and tops of my wrists, and i want to break all of my fingers. i want to pull my teeth out, all of my eyebrows and eyelashes. I want to feel. i am angry, and body to suffer.
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practice your patience lauren, it's only one day. Be tolerant of this things that you have no control over, you can't do anything about this. learn to wait please
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I hope i'm not being hyperbolic, i'm genuinely so exhausted i could collapse. today was supposed to be my day off but now i have to deal with your mistakes because i have no other option. You're such an idiot thinking that this was a good idea and i can't believe that you're so selfish all the time. I know i'm selfish so i feel hypocritical saying do, but it's killing me. You never think about anyone but yourself and i'm on my last nerve. I want to scream and cry and i'm exhausted i can't believe you. How can you be this selfish. I've worked 75 hours this week and all you've done is take acid so that means this day is all about you. Im sick of the empty promises and the inability to follow through. I might be naggy and annoying but i don't like any you to be hurt. I don't know what to do im getting so tired of this selfishness
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