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cyberpunk-spectre · 3 years ago

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Untitled - Elliot Alderson × GN! Reader

Angst, mentions of trauma and abuse.

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“Do you think they’re mad at me?”

Mr. Robot paused, turning to meet Elliot’s figure. The young man in question was sitting upright on his mattress, keeping as still as possible as to not disturb the sleeping figure next to him.

“What…?” Mr. Robot voiced, confused. He and Elliot had been talking about their plan to take down the Deus Group when Elliot suddenly brought up such a weird question.

“[Y/N],” Elliot said softer, “do you think [Y/N]’s mad at me?”

Mr. Robot glanced over at the sleeping figure. [Y/N] [L/N]—a unique individual, a lot like Elliot in some ways, and yet completely different in others. The two fit together like USB and port. No wonder they had such a steady relationship despite, well, everything.

You stirred lightly, your brows scrunching up. You were having some sort of nightmare, although Mr. Robot couldn’t say what it was about.

The being that was Mr. Robot turned back to Elliot, who had also been glancing at your sleeping form. “Why would you think that?”

“Because I’ve been ignoring them. Hiding away while you take control…” his voice slowly turned shaky as the horroundus memories that Vera forced Elliot to dig up with his therapist began invading his mind.

“Kid,” Mr. Robot sighed out, not entirely sure how to phrase what he wanted to say. “No. No, they aren’t mad. They wouldn’t be, not after everything you’ve been through.”

Elliot glanced up to meet Mr. Robot’s gaze. Mr. Robot could see the pain in his eyes, wishing he could just take it all away, making things go back to how they were when Elliot didn’t know the truth.

“I don’t like hiding away like this. Not from them.” Elliot’s voice was quiet, his grey eyes looking down. He was shaking, although he seemed to be trying to fight it off.

“Elliot, you can’t beat yourself about this—this was something you were never supposed to know. It was my job to keep it from you, and I failed.” Mr. Robot protested, hating the fact that Elliot was hurting so bad.

Elliot sniffled, a silent sign that he had been crying. “I know, it’s why I created you. But I hate not being able to look into his eyes. It hurts, because I… because I…” he stopped himself.

Mr. Robot had the ghost of a smile on his lips. “It’s because you love them, I know.”

Elliot just nodded.

Mr. Robot sighed again, contemplating on whether or not he should tell Elliot. He had every right to know, no matter what you thought.

The man grumbled to himself, deciding to say ‘fuck it’ to whatever you would say to him later. He walked over to Elliot, kneeling down to meet his eyes.

“I have something to tell you, Kiddo. Even though [Y/N] told me not to tell you.” Mr. Robot began. His words caused Elliot to perk right up, unintentionally showing his puffy red eyes to his protector.

Mr. Robot didn’t say anything about them as he continued. “It was a few days after we met. Well, after they met me. I won’t ever forget what they told me that day.”

Elliot tilted his head, wiping his eye with the sleeve of his trusted hoodie. “What… did they say?”

Mr. Robot glanced at you again. You had kicked the comforter off, being too hot beneath it. Your torso was exposed to the world, showing off your well-shaped, yet battered body.

There were scars everywhere, vastly ranging in sizes. There were a few tattoos here and there—nothing too frivolous. Mostly used to cover up the biggest and nastiest scars of your collection.

“They said they knew why I existed. Told me they knew why you created me. Of course, they didn’t know the exact reasoning behind it, but they said that they had dealt with severe trauma cases before in others. Although, we were unique, they said that we were special.” Mr. Robot explained.

Now it was Elliot’s turn to look back at you, not really understanding.

“Special?”

Mr. Robot shrugged. “Hey, your guess is as good as mine. But that’s not why I’m telling you this. I’m telling you because they understand why you haven’t been the one driving. They understand why you need to just hide away. They aren’t mad at you, Kid. They would never be mad at you. They love you too much.”

Mr. Robot’s words made Elliot’s heart skip a beat. He was still so new to this whole dating game, but he couldn’t deny the connection you shared.

Elliot was still having a hard time getting used to the idea that there was someone out there who was there for him. Who cared for him. Who loved him.

He was so thankful that you stayed by his side, even after everything you had been through since you first met.

Elliot turned to look back at Mr. Robot, however the man was nowhere to be seen. Elliot was about to jump to his feet and call out to him when he felt the mattress beneath him move.

“Elliot…?” The half-asleep voice of [Y/N] [L/N] spoke up, catching Elliot’s attention. Elliot looked over, seeing you sit up, rubbing the sleep out of your eyes.

Once your eyes adjusted to the darkness of Elliot’s apartment, you slumped into a more comfortable position, staring at Elliot’s figure.

“Or…” you began softly, your voice sending shivers down Elliot’s spine. “Is it you?”

“It’s me.” Elliot replied, almost inaudibly. You perked right up at that.

“Really?”

Elliot nodded.

You smiled warmly. “Did you sleep at all, Babe?”

Elliot didn’t say anything, simply shaking his head. He could feel his heart running a marathon in his chest as he was starting to break down. He didn’t mean to, but he was still just so overwhelmed, and the sudden disappearance of Mr. Robot didn’t help at all.

“Babe? Is everything okay? Elliot…?” Your voice was full of concern. You moved across the mattress, scooting closer to Elliot.

You then reached out, placing your hand on Elliot’s shoulder.

That’s what set him off.

He knew you would never hurt him, but he was in such a fragile state that he had no control over the fear that took over every fibre of his being.

Elliot jumped back, reacting on pure instinct. “DON’T FUCKING TOUCH ME!!”

You immediately pulled back, startled by Elliot’s outburst. You instantly realised what caused the reaction, mentally kicking yourself.

“Fuck, Babe, I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean too…” you trailed off once you heard Elliot whimpering.

“I’m sorry,” Elliot whimpered, his body curling into a ball, trembling. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m fucking sorry…!”

He continued to repeat that phrase over and over, rocking back and forth. He was having a full on breakdown, which broke your heart, as you knew exactly how that sort of panic felt.

You scooted even closer to Elliot, attempting to reach out again to comfort your boyfriend out of reflex. You then stopped yourself, remembering what triggered the panic attack in the first place.

However, before you fully pulled away, Elliot’s body moved entirely on its own, falling into your arms as Elliot cried into their chest. You went still, taking a second to process what was happening. Then, Elliot felt you embrace him, holding him close.

“Elliot,” you began softly, resting your chin on the top of Elliot’s head as he let Elliot cry it all out. “You have absolutely nothing to be sorry about.”

“But I’ve been ignoring you—pushing you away when all you’ve ever done was try to help me.” Elliot sniffled.

Elliot felt your grip tighten. “What you’re going through, Elliot… fuck, man. Nobody should ever have to go through that shit. It’s why Mr. Robot exists in the first place, to keep you safe from things you were never meant to know. What Vera did—well, I’m fucking glad he’s dead and I’ll leave it at that.”

Elliot chuckled at the tone of your words. He then sniffled, resting his head on your chest, your embrace making Elliot feel safe, protected.

“So… you’re not mad at me?”

Elliot felt you go still, completely shocked. “Mad? Babe, how could I possibly be mad at you?”

“I’ve been ignoring you,” Elliot repeated, “hiding away, leaving Mr. Robot in control, it isn’t fair to you and I’m—”

You cut Elliot off before he fell into another rant. “Elliot, I don’t blame you for anything. You need time to cope with this, to find out some way to keep going. And if letting Mr. Robot do everything helps you with that, then I’ll put up with his bitching for as long as I need to.”

“Hey!” A familiar voice piped up. Elliot perked up at the sound, peeling away from your chest. He looked over your shoulder to where Mr. Robot himself stood—in the corner of Elliot’s apartment, right by his computer.

There was a fond smile on his face. He meant what he said as a joke. He wasn’t pissed off by your comment at all.

Realising what Elliot was looking at, you followed his gaze in the general direction of where you believed Mr. Robot was standing. You had to make a guess due to the fact you couldn’t exactly see Mr. Robot. Only Elliot could.

“I fucking mean it too, man.” You said.

Mr. Robot looked at you, chuckling. He then looked back at Elliot with that same smile, however it felt more genuine that time.

Oh… Elliot now figured out why Mr. Robot had disappeared.

That was… quite nice of him, actually.

“He’s smiling…” Elliot said softly, wanting you to know that Mr. Robot understood the joke you made.

You turned back to Elliot with a smile of your own. “Good.”

You then cupped Elliot’s face in your hands, the two of you locking eyes. “You’re going through a lot, but I want you to know that I will always be here for you, Elliot. Always.”

Elliot’s lips curled into a small, yet entirely genuine, smile. He grabbed your wrists, keeping your eyes locked. “Okay.” Was all he said.

You smiled as you kissed Elliot’s lips. Elliot didn’t flinch, or pull back—instead he kissed back. Quite unusual for him, but he was learning. Patience truly was the price of your relationship.

So it was a damn good thing that you were also one very patient individual when you wanted to be.

#elliot alderson imagines #elliot alderson x reader

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