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dbh-has-ruined-me · 6 years
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Connor, gesturing to a drawing: Hank, look at this! I drew Gavin! Hank: Gavin doesn’t have red hair. Connor: Yeah but his head’s on fire. Hank: Hank: Oh.
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dbh-has-ruined-me · 6 years
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North: It’s just an essay. It’s easy.
Josh: Well, what’s it about?
North: The Romantic Poets.
Josh: And why is that easy?
North: There’s just not much to say about it.
Josh: [reads] “The Romantic Poets were just a bunch of emos.”
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dbh-has-ruined-me · 6 years
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Connor: You were specifically told: no fighting, no swearing and no drinking alcohol. Hank: Connor: And I caught you bashing that guy’s head on the floor shouting: “Don’t touch my fucking beer!”
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dbh-has-ruined-me · 6 years
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Kidnapper [over the phone]: We have your son.
RK900: I’m physically incapable of having a son.
Kidnapper: Then who just asked for chocolate milk with a straw and made us cut the crusts off his PB&J?
RK900: … *hangs up*
Connor: Where are you going?
RK900 [putting on his jacket]: They have Detective Reed.
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dbh-has-ruined-me · 6 years
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gavin became father
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dbh-has-ruined-me · 6 years
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How not to start a revolution
link
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dbh-has-ruined-me · 6 years
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I have never had more conflicting feelings towards a character than I have for Gavin Reed.
Like, he’s an asshole, but I love him.
I don’t get it.
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dbh-has-ruined-me · 6 years
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Ok but what if Connor is a lot more aggressive and cold compared to RK900? And RK900 is just soft in every way?? god tier headcanons
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dbh-has-ruined-me · 6 years
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You shouldn’t have asked…
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dbh-has-ruined-me · 6 years
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Connor: So, you lied. About everything.
Amanda: I didn’t lie. I just avoided specific truths to manipulate you.
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dbh-has-ruined-me · 6 years
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Simon: You got yourself a coffee? Markus: Yeah, double espresso. Simon: A double espresso? Markus: Well, you’re one who’s telling me to, like, try new things all the time. Simon: Yeah, but I meant vegetables and stuff, not stimulants. You’ve never had caffeine before, I- Markus: Don’t get in a state. I only drank half of it. Simon: Oh, okay. Markus: Connor drank the other half. Simon: Simon: You let Connor drink a double espresso? Connor: It tasted horrible to begin with, but then I added five spoonfuls of sugar and now I feel all zingy zangy zongy! Simon: Zingy. Zangy. Zongy. Connor: I feel like lightning! Simon: Oh my God.
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dbh-has-ruined-me · 6 years
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I love all the characters and try my hardest to take the game seriously and I promised myself I’d reflect that in my blog. That’s failed. It’s just Connor Shitposts. I’m surprisingly okay with that
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dbh-has-ruined-me · 6 years
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Hank Fucking Mourns
I accidentally got Connors Line Decommissioned. That’s him dead for good now and I’m really upset whoops. But here’s a hot take cause Connor and Hank have a great friendship (or father/son relationship if you want to take it that way,which I do cause that’s such a badass way of looking at it) also big thanks to @dwarfgourami for telling me this is good enough to post!!
Hank would be upset when they say Connors been destroyed,been taken apart to find the glitches in his system. Hank would fucking mourn and everyone around him would be like ‘I thought you hated those plastic pricks’. And he does hate them. He hates their shiny faces and the way they follow you around like puppies and the fact they took everything over and the way they pried into your personal life. Did all androids pry into your personal life in an offer to save you? Or was that just Connor? Would every android repeatedly spare others just because they saw a soul behind those sensors? Could every Android stare down a barrel of a gun and admit there’s nothing but blackness if he shuts down? When they shut him down.
Connor was his friend goddamnit
He’s angry that the androids aren’t permanent. He’s angry that Connor was young and just starting to feel empathy and think for himself and they took that away.
They bring in new,shiny,better models. He knows that just means that they’re more compliant to demands. He insists he going back to working without one. There’s one of them that looks like Connor and talks like Connor and even knows his name but it’s just like at the start. No emotions,no knowledge of Hanks home life. Just a glorified toaster that they’ve trusted with crimes.
Hank fucking mourns.
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dbh-has-ruined-me · 6 years
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I’ve found out that you can get Hank to kill himself and there was hankcon nsfw straight after it and I’ve never been so upset in two different ways that strongly before
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dbh-has-ruined-me · 6 years
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Connor (concerned): Fruit on pizza is highly illogical,Lieutenant
Hank (extremely drunk) : YOURE HIGHLY ILLOGICAL *takes a bite out of Ham and Pineapple pizza*
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dbh-has-ruined-me · 6 years
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Dad I know how much you love smashing a ton of apples and one (1) lemon well no longer will you have to use your bare knuckles for such a task
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dbh-has-ruined-me · 6 years
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Carl: Paint something,Markus
Markus (thinking): This is it,he’s finally gone fucking senile
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