dcamato

[dcamato]

“Why…why can’t you love me? I’m telling you im leaving and you aren’t even fighting for me. Why am I not worth fighting for? Did you EVER love me?!” Steve chokes out through a river of tears falling down his cheeks. They’d gone to Indy for the weekend, some holiday shopping for the Party and everyone else and a chance to cut loose and have some fun for them. Eddie had been weird all day - when they went to the diner for lunch (the waiter crossed the line leaving his number there and Steve made sure to use the napkin before leaving it behind); when they were shopping, Eddie kept moving away from Steve no matter what Steve did to stay close. By the time they’d hit the bar, it was like being alone again. Steve didn’t know what he’d done but he tried to fix it. Bought Eddie a drink, kept trying to put his arm around him, asking him to dance…when Eddie got upset and actually pushed Steve away, he was done. He watched Eddie start talking to some dude (who looked quite a bit like Steve, btw).He walked back to the hotel, tears threatening every step. He tried to call Robs (no answer) and even thought about calling Nancy (add to this pain? Maybe not) when the door opens. “I’ll be gone in a few, dude, so you can bring your date back here.” Eddie is looking down, pain and shame fighting for first on his face. “Stevie…” “no, you can’t say that to me right now, no. Pretty clear now,thinking back on the day, you want nothing more to do with me. Don’t know what I did but fine, I’ll go.” “Steve, please just…” You’re free to do and see and fuck whoever you want since you obviously don’t want me.” “HARRINGTON!” Stop! Please…just give me a minute to talk. Please, baby…” “Why…why can’t you love me? I’m telling you im leaving and you aren’t even fighting for me. Why am I not worth fighting for? Did you EVER love me?!” Eddie can barely see through his own tears but he grabs Steve as they both crumple to the ground. The next few minutes are silent, punctuated with sobs, deep breaths and mumbled words of comfort. When he can finally breathe and he knows Steve is calm enough to listen and truly hear the words, Eddie starts talking - “you are worth more to me than I could ever give and that was my problem. I made it yours these last few days, actually, and you don’t deserve that. You don’t deserve someone like me - doing nothing, going nowhere, with no future. You deserve the white knight, fighting dragons for you, going into battle for you. Coming back to you to sing your praises and offer their love. The best I can do is the last one - and I know that’s not enough. You deserve the world and all it has to offer, not some tiny corner of it that’s not much more than dirt. Since I knew I’d never be brave enough to leave you - I love you to damned much for that - I had to make you hate me enough to leave. Guess I am good at something at least. Just didn’t realize how…how soul deep the pain of you leaving would actually be. I don’t deserve you, even less now with what I’ve done but YOU don’t deserve to think it’s because your unloveable or not worthy of love. You are so insanely lovable and deserve to be loved by better than the likes of me…”. Eddie’s eyes shone, shed tears gripped tight to his lashes. He refused to hurt this beautiful man that he would love forever, not one more moment of pain would he cause him. His love for Steve simply wouldn’t allow it. Steve, for his part, was in turns confused, angry, hurt, awed and enamored. Every word spoken healed a crack in his heart; it made him understand how dumb they both were (yeah, Robs had said they needed to work on communication) and how much he needed to make Eddie understand right now - “Eds, sweetheart, you’re an idiot.” “HEY!…” “No, you are but so am I. We both want to give each other everything and we think the other one is going to leave to find it. Baby, to me, you ARE my knight,- you nearly died for a town that hated you, but you stay in the face of that and that is so, so brave; you defend my honor regularly with those shitheads when they get mouthy. You kill the spiders I can’t bring

[dcamato]

#doesitcountifIwasajoytohaveinclass

the “pleasure to have in class” to overly active tumblr user pipeline

[dcamato]

Reblog if you’re over 20 and still read/write fan fiction.

I’m curious!

[dcamato]

Please spread the word!!!!

STOP KOSA.

PLEASE CALL YOUR SENATOR.

The above links provide scripts for phone calls and letters/emails you can send if you prefer! PLEASE!!!!

[dcamato]

oh uh. scuse me. just a lil snail crossing your dash

[dcamato]

#lovethemsoooooomuch

they'll make it work

[dcamato]

WE MADE IT FOLKS!!!

[dcamato]

i'm bisexual and tired. rb if you're bisexual and tired.