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me, every day: i just dont have the energy for this today

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i was a kid asking questions like "when you say to rate my pain on a scale of 1 to 10 do you mean relative to what i have experienced before or what i could theoretically experience in the future because what if i say 8 and then later i get twenty billion papercuts and i realise relative to that this pain is a 1" and they would reply "just focus on what you know, you literally had your foot ran over by a ford focus" and id say "well exactly but it could have been both feet which i know would surely be worse" and it still took years to diagnose me as autistic

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i like the phrases "it's not for me," "it's not my thing," and "i'm not the target audience" because they're the most concise way to express "this thing that you enjoy has merits but idgaf about it" without being aggressive

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I dueled a wasp with my katana for 45 minutes and i lost

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I don't care how bad life gets i'm not watching Love Island

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I remember when people pretended to care about bees for a few years because they were an indicator species and now I’m getting replies to that post like “idc if all bugs die as long as we get rid of mosquitos and flies and cockroaches” YOURE GONNA FUCKING DIE!!!!! WE WILL DIE TOO!!!!! WE WILL ALL DIE WITHOUT BUGS!!!! IM NOT KIDDING!!!!

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I cast kidney stone on you

No you don't

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Hello

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Okay but seriously… China gagged the whole world with this everybody else just pack it up it’s over

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Thats not what I wanted + crass

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Old Yeller just parried the bullet

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