deputyrichard-blog

[deputyrichard-blog]

flipping--fallxn:

The air was cool, though Fallon was sure that wasn’t the only thing causing goosebumps to form on her skin. After of weeks of finally trying to make a place at the farmhouse, for some odd reason, she finally got tossed in to do a patrol. It was unexpected, but not unwelcome. She was combat, and was hoping for a chance to finally walk about and check the perimeter. 

She decided to dress for the part–it was getting close to dusk.  She put on her boots, along with a pair of jeans, a t-shirt, and flannel to go over the thin fabric. Her knife was in her back pocket, just in case. She knew her bat wasn’t going to hold up much longer, but it was still steadfast in her hand, briefly using it as a cane of some sorts as she waited for the patrol to start. 

She slipped outside into the cool air, a heavy sigh escaping her lips as she rolled her shoulders. She wasn’t necessarily excited, but it was nice to be depended on. It felt right, at least to her. 

The screen door creaked open, and Fallon turned, the messy bun on her head nearly coming down as she spotted the much taller male stepping outside. This was her patrolling partner, and she was just relieved it wasn’t Jay or Jess. They still didn’t have the best impression of her…but hopefully this night would change that. “Hey. Ready to go?” 

Richard saw his name on the patrol with the new addition to the group the night before. While he was hocked Henry didn’t insist on taking her out first, making sure she was set for what the patrols were, he was glad he got the chance too. He hadn’t spoken to Fallon much. While it was of course hard to miss anyone in the small house, which he isn’t complaining about, he seemed to not have much of a chance to speak to her yet.

Even with the patrol in the evening Richard still did his early morning work out and help with the fences before the patrol in the evening. He grabbed two bottles of water, one for each of them, before making his way outside where he saw Fallon already waiting. It was nice to see that she would at least be on time.

Richard shoot her a friendly smile before offering out the water bottle. “It might get in the way to take it with us but it’s nice to have before taking off.” He opened his, taking a long drink that almost downed half of the bottle before he looked her over. She was small but she had a bat and seemed to be dressed for the part. Looking over her weapon it was clear the thing had seen a few good hits.

“We do have a few extra weapons like that hanging around. I am sure if you could use a new one we could make sure that happened.” Richard smiled again before taking another drink and finished off the water. He placed the bottle on the porch, he would take care of it when they got back, before check his holster for his gun and police baton. “If you’re ready lets get going.”

Richard waited to make sure she was ready before heading out the main gate. He turned right heading around the north side of the fence first. He got only a few feet away before he started talking again. “Our goal with these patrols is to keep the house as safe as possible. We look for weak spots in out defenses, check to see if there are more zeds in the area and where it seems they are coming from, clear them out if so. It normally about five hours so I hope you ate dinner.”

Out and About~Richard && Fallon

[deputyrichard-blog]

sgtblake:

deputyrichard:

In a way, Richard isn’t wrong. It’s not a single vote that’s keeping them at the farm house. But Richard is the figurehead for their movement. He’s vocal and he’s the one that others look up to, so he has to shoulder his sense of responsibility the same as Henry does. Is he to blame for them staying? No. Are Alex’s and James’s deaths his fault? No. But they’re in the middle of a heated debate with tensions riding way too high, so words spill out. Even if it’s something Henry might feel bad about saying later.

But Richard is also wrong. War is the only thing that’s kept them all alive so far. Without war, without his experiences and training, Henry would have been dead a long time ago. War taught him discipline and responsibility and how to plan, survive, and attack. Without war, Henry would not be who he is today. Trying to explain that to a small town boy like Richard, though, would just be a waste of breath, so Henry ignores the jab. It’s very, very easy to forget the words when Richard is shoving accusations at him.

Henry sucks in a breath at the unexpected attack, feeling the pain and weight of death pushing down on him for a moment. It’s replaced, instantly, with white-hot rage. How fucking dare Richard try to turn something like that around on him. He’s already explained that people will die if they stay there. There isn’t enough training in the world to stop accidents from happening in overcrowded, over-searched areas. Alex died because they had to backtrack to an area they stirred up, just weeks ago. And now Richard is pinning her death on Henry like an ugly scarlet letter, and Henry goes from annoyed and angry to furious in just a couple of split seconds.

He shoves Richard, hard. He has the training to push his weight behind it, and Richard’s back collides with the counter with a loud, unpleasant noise. Henry’s on him in a blink though, his hands balling up in the cotton of Richard’s stupid shirt as he looks over his shocked expression. Rich isn’t a conventionally attractive man, but his face is flushed with passion and there’s anger and rage swirling in his eyes. Henry wants to punch him, so badly, but his hands are twisted up in Richard’s shirt, and he can feel his warm breath on Henry’s cheek, and the next thing Henry knows he’s kissing that stupid, annoying expression right off of Richard’s face.

In any normal conversation Richard would never say any of it. He wouldn’t mean any of it. But now, in the heat of the fight. Richard blames Henry for it all.  He would regret it the second they stepped away In fact he regretted it the moment his rage is reflected back on Henry’s face. He goes to say something. Anything. But then again he is still much to angry and he almost liked having the upper hand for once. Being about to make Henry as angry and he has made him over the course of the argument.

He doesn’t expect Henry’s hands to fly up. Even if he did expect it he is pretty sure that Richard still would have been able to push him back at hard. The hitting the counter Richard feels the pain shoot through his lower back. His shocked and also even more pissed and Richard almost wants to push him back.

He doesn’t. Doesn’t really have the time to think about it. Richard doesn’t have the chance to react in anyway before Henry in right there, hands balled in his shirt and Richard braces himself for the hit he knows is coming. He expects a punch. Expects being able to throw it in Henry’s face how he lost control. He doesn’t hit him though, not exactly. While there is enough force of Henry’s lips crashing into his that it could feel like a hit at first.

Richard freezes wide eyed for a second. Then with out thinking he is kissing him back. With equal force pushing into Henry. Richard wants to reach out. To pull on his shirt the same way holding him there but Henry’s arms are in the way. So he grabs for the back of his head. There is enough hair there from his hand to tangle and pull at it with out really having to think to much about it. Richard is still pissed, For a split second he thinks about pushing Henry back still giving him an actual hit. Instead he just puts that force and energy into the kiss.

Easiest Target // Henry && Richard

[deputyrichard-blog]

“You obviously don’t know my sister at all if you think she’d just roll over. That fence out there was her pride and joy, but even she can admit a lost cause when she sees one.” Henry snorts derisively at Richard’s attempt to instill doubt in him. If Jay honestly thought that they should stay, she would tell him. It’s too important of a decision for anything else. Even when they were little kids, if Henry wanted to do something and Jay didn’t, she let him know. There’s a sense of blunt honesty between the Blake siblings that’s been fostered through adolescence that’s the keystone of their relationship. It’s why no matter what the fight is about, or how annoying someone is, they always fall back to one another. Honesty and loyalty are worth their weight in gold, and Jay has those qualities fully stocked.

“Situations change, Rich. If you don’t change with them, you’re just as good as dead. Whether you’re out there, or in here.” Henry believes Richard when he says he isn’t looking to lead the group. If he was, there would have been a twisted kind of attempted mutiny awhile back. Richard’s had the numbers on his side for a very for awhile

“Out there we have a chance to move, to run, to adapt to the conflict. Humanity is resiliency, and if you don’t see that,” Henry shakes his head. He doesn’t know how else to be clear, and he’s starting to see red with the implication of Alex’s death on his hands. Henry will take responsibility for putting her down, but not for getting her killed. They were out west because it was the only ‘safe’ area left to scout, and the zulus were too concentrated for them to get out safely. If they hadn’t found the SVU when they did, who knows how many of them would have come back alive. Or if any of them would come back alive.

“Alex died because we’ve run out of places to scout. We’re backed into a goddamn corner and it’s because of you. You live in this fantasy little land, and it’s killing people. And it’ll kill more.” Henry punctuates his words with a look that’s a cross between a sneer and a grimace.

Richard hates that he can’t seem to make Henry doubt himself. He hates the what Henry is saying he has already thought. He hates more then anything that Henry is getting to him. That he is buying into the fight and can’t help but yell back at him. His voice slowly getting louder the longer the argument goes on for. Richard wishes he could just walk away but the tense is to high. He almost feels chocked by it, let he doesn’t move from his spot looking down at Henry.

“My vote isn’t what is keeping you here. There was others who feel the same way. I don’t force their hand. I don’t force their vote. You want change talk to them. I am just once voice out of all of them.” To think that Henry is taking all of this out on him when it was over half of the group who voted to stay. Normally at other time Richard would stay calm, let Henry yell and just let it happen. But he has been to hard on himself lately that someone else saying out loud what he has been thinking Richard feels the need to fight back.

“Once again not everyone has to see your way. War has skewed your judgment on the world.” He pauses. Richard completely stops everything when Henry says the words ‘it’s because of him’. Henry seems to have no problem placing all of the blame on him for the death of Alex. A death he wasn’t there for. While he stays silent, almost frozen for a second or two. The thaws and Richard can’t help but outright blame Henry in return.

He stops forward. Pushing Henry right in the chest with his pointer finger every time he days the word you. “Alex looked to you for protection. Everyone here does. When they go out there, they count on you to keep them safe. If we all were smarter and if you were not so help bent on getting a second car to get out of her maybe Alex would be here.”

Easiest Target // Henry && Richard

[deputyrichard-blog]

“Jay, the one who built up the fence, voted to leave. What the hell does that say to you? We’re not safe here. We haven’t been for awhile.” His sister is fantastic at what she does, but she isn’t a miracle worker. Even she knows that, and Jay is never one to admit defeat. To hear that she wants to leave is more than enough to fuel Henry into pushing for it. If Jay feels like it’s time to go, then it is. He trusts her professional opinion more than anyone else’s in the group.

Richard falls into a defensive stance as the confusion is wiped off of his face and replaced by annoyance. He’s buying into the fight that Henry wants, and they’re face to face with just a few inches apart as Henry continues to yell at him. He’s surprised that no one else has come into the kitchen to interrupt them, especially with Layne in the other room. Maybe she left to avoid any extra drama. The last time she opened her mouth, she ended with with Jess hitting her like she could win a prize if the blows were hard enough.

“You’d love that wouldn’t you. Deputy Do-right swooping in to save the group from the power hungry leader. This is real fucking life Rich. You aren’t some small town hero here to save the goddamn day. You’re the idiot going to get people killed because you can’t see the bigger picture. We’ll all die here because you’re too stubborn to leave. Is that what you want?”

“Did you ever thing she is just voting how she thinks you would want her too?” Richard has no clue if this is true or not but he is feeding on the negative energy that Henry is putting out there now. Henry is making him doubt himself. Richard has already been doing that enough on his own lately and he doesn’t need help. Now he can’t help but want to make Henry doubt himself too even if he isn’t going to succeed, he wants to try. “Jay would do anything for you. Anyone can see that. Maybe she is even putting what she really feels aside just to not make you call her an idiot like you do everyone else who wants to stay.”

Richard craves to have more space. He wants to take a second step back from Henry. To get his own air and now feel as strangled by the tension. To step back would prove weakness though. Richard has an advance in height on Henry. It’s petty but he likes making Henry have to look up to him.“We can be safe here. It will take time and work but no you all rather just take off and get those who can’t protect themselves kill but it will be fine because those who can defend themselves will be safe.”

Normally Richard is able to keep a calm head but it is almost impossible now. He has been fighting with his own mind lately. Doubting everyone safety and doubting himself. When Henry came in seeming to be looking for a fight it was almost impossible for Richard to now fall into it. “You are twisting my words.” Richard shacks his head. “I am not looking to be the leader or save them from you.” Richard throws his hands in the air. He has never tried to lead the group. But this is a group. They vote, they all get a say, and for Henry to throw it in his face like he was the only one who voted to stay makes him angry.

“And you think that you won’t get people killed out there? Look at Alex. She died out there. On a patrol with you.” It bitter and harsh and almost sounds like Richard is blaming Henry for Alex’s death but then again this whole fight could sound like Henry blaming Richard for her’s and James’ passing. “We will all die out there. With out a steady source of wood, water, protection from the elements. Can’t you see that no where is completely safe now and this is just the best we got?”

Easiest Target // Henry && Richard

[deputyrichard-blog]

She watches him for a moment, wondering what he thinks about the whole situation, Jess doesn’t blame him fully for what’s happened, she kind of blames all of them. Everyone who keeps deciding to keep the rest of them to stay. She understands that he’s wanting to do what’s best, but the fact that he doesn’t see that going is what’s best is what bothers her. And many in the house just follow his lead not knowing what really needs to be done.

“The weather is great, I’m glad it’s getting cooler.” She’s a little worried though, if they do in fact get forced out of here, traveling in the cold won’d do anyone good, it doesn’t get as bad here as it does elsewhere but winter nights anywhere are bad, and since they don’t really have the proper clothing. Jess doesn’t want to thing about what it will be like if they’re forced out. The longer they wait the worse it will be.

“You should go Richard, I wouldn’t want to keep you.” There’s a slight hint of sarcasm in her voice, she doesn’t want to spend much more time with him, not talking about the weather when all she wants to do is yell at him for leading half the house in the wrong idea that staying will keep them alive.

Richard nods before looking away. He can clearly hear the sarcasm in her voice, no matter how faint it was. Richard know that Jessica isn’t his number one fan. She isn’t at the top of his list either. But even if they can’t see eye to eye they both are in the same group here and now a days that meant everything.

He gave a nod before grabbing to take a final drink from his water bottle and set it on the porch. “I’ll see you around Jessica.” Richard turns and starts his run out the fence.

Morning Routine|| Richard & Open

[deputyrichard-blog]

“I’m too pretty to die here, goddammit,” Henry practically yells. He probably isn’t making this any easier on Rich as he takes another step forward, closing the distance between them. Rich’s brows furrow noticeably in confusion, and it just makes Henry’s annoyance worse. It’s not Rich’s fault, obviously, but Henry craves someone to blame. He doesn’t put his hands on Richard again. Henry doesn’t want it to actually devolve into a fist fight, and he knows that is someone pushed into his personal space, he would push back.

“And you with your stupid, pretty, stupid face.” He sounds like a small child, but Layne’s little comment has him so worked up. Henry does everything he can to keep everyone alive. He lives and breathes responsibility, but lately he feels like no one’s listening. There’s a best plan of action, and they finally have the means to put it together, but they aren’t. They’re waiting for disaster and massacre to fall onto their doorsteps. And right now, Henry’s full of the one emotion he just can’t stand. Helplessness just makes him more and more angry. This has been building up for awhile, and right now he’s about ready to blow.

“What the hell are we waiting for?” His hands are curled into fists right now by his side, and he’s waiting for answers to his confusing questions. Henry’s about ready to punch something. Not Richard, but the wall, or the counter, or maybe kick a chair. It’s so uncharacteristic of him, but he’s reached the end of his rope and he needs something right now. Something he can hold onto.

Richard barely gets a step back before Henry takes another one forward. The close distance and intense yelling coming from Henry, Richard can’t help but feel attacked. His face stays confused for a bit. At first he debates comforting Henry. Richard’s hand even goes forward and touches Henry’s shoulder trying to make his face more calm then confused. “You don’t die here. No one else is going to die here. We can make this place safe.”

Richard believes every word he says. He believes that this place can be safe. That they can be safe there. They all just need to try harder and focus on staying not on getting out. His hand falls from Henry’s shoulder when he calls him stupid. He insist Henry didn’t actually complement his face in the middle of calling it stupid just get annoyed at the stupid part.

“Wanting to believe that we are safe here isn’t stupid.” Richard crosses his arms over his chest. Maybe he is just assuming that this is over all what Henry is yelling about but he is feeding on his clear anger and annoyance and tenses as he grows frustrated with the situation. When Henry asked what they are waiting for Richard can’t help but throw his hands up.

“You tell me. You are the leader. If you don’t like how things are going force them to change.” While Richard doesn’t want that to happen, if wouldn’t be fair to boss around others after it was said everything was by a vote, but if Henry wanted to leave that badly he could force them all to easily.

Easiest Target // Henry && Richard

[deputyrichard-blog]

sgtblake:

It’s small and petty. He’s in Layne’s ‘office’, getting his last check out for his concussion. Henry’s felt fine for weeks, but head injuries can linger around, so he goes to her right after lunch because he knows it’ll help set Jay’s mind at rest. Layne’s there, checking him out, and she makes a small comment on the lack of injuries inside of the camp. Henry has a remark, right on the tip of his tongue, but he bites it back. Layne gets a total of ten words out of him for the rest of their ten minute exchange, and when Henry leaves, there’s a stiff goodbye and nothing else.

Henry heads to the kitchen, because it should be empty this far after lunch. He’ll grab a water bottle, head out the back door, and not come back until sundown. But for some odd reason, Richard just happens to be there. It’s the wrong person in the wrong place at the wrong time, and Henry sees red.

“You’re an idiot, and because of it other people are being idiots,” Henry says, pushing a finger into Richard’s chest. It’s not fair, but it’s the first thing that pops into Henry’s head. He’s been nice to Richard, civil even. He technically owes him his life. But it’s very easy to take all of the anxiety and frustration he’s had for so long on such an easy target.

Lunch is long over and Richard takes the empty kitchen and mostly empty house as a good time to do a check of the stocks. He keeps track, using the list when they do send out for supplies on what is low and what they need most of. It’s an easy inside job that anyone could do but Richard likes keep track of everything.

Luckily a few days ago Jessica and Jay come back from a hunt with a few rabbits and turkey. It isn’t a lot but it is something. At least it shows there are still a few areas that can be hunted here and with more game moving due to the winter months starting to come this way. Richard is about the open the pantry when he hears someone else enter the kitchen. He barely turns around and doesn’t even get a hello out before Henry is in front of him, finger poking him in the chest, and Richard pauses for a second trying to understand what is happening.

“I... what?” Richard is completely taken back. He actually physically takes a step back from Henry. Not being a fan of getting actually pushed in the chest along with the harsh words. His confused. Just trying to make sure the inventory of the kitchen was up to date and make list of what they need to look for the most. He can’t help but just stare confused at Henry waiting for more of the out lash to come so he knows what it is about.

Easiest Target // Henry && Richard

[deputyrichard-blog]

.

The weather is starting to turn, winter is on it’s way and Jess is apprehensive about it, it would have been much easier and safer to travel when the nights would be warmer and if they do indeed leave this place soon, the colder night won’t help them. She hates to stay inside the house so she puts on her longer sleeve shirt to keep the cool air off and she steps outside.

She spots Richard almost the second she gets outside and he looks all set to run, “morning.” She considers for a moment to go with him, she possibly would but tonight Jess doesn’t want to build up a sweat in the clothing she’s in. “Not today.”

She’ll save more of a workout for later, maybe see if someone wants to switch patrol times with her, or see if she can relieve someone of their patrol. She’s itching to get moving and stay out of the house, many are still reeling from the death of two of their own and Jess hates how the house feels. Hates that she knows it won’t be the end, James and Alex were only the first deaths bound to happen if they stay here.

Richard doesn’t expect Jessica to go out on the run with him. With two deaths recently he knows that she is more then likely one of the ones who blames him for it. He uses Alex’s death, because it happened on a supply run not inside the safety of their fence, as a buffer to blame himself less. It is just a sign that outside, death happens. It isn’t suppose to happen inside.

Others don’t see it that way and Richard understands their side. Still, he holds hope to the house. Hope to some sort of normal life. Hope that he isn’t as moronic as some seem to think and he is right about this place being safe. It is all he can do. If he is proven wrong, that means he has put everyone at risk wanting them to stay here. He would have done the complete opposite of what he was trying to do.

So he forces on slight small talk. If it gets to awkward or it is clear Jess doesn’t want to be spoken to at least he does have his run as a reason to leave. “Wonderful weather don’t you think?”

Morning Routine|| Richard & Open

[deputyrichard-blog]

“You can disagree with me all you want, but how can you not see what’s happening right under your nose. We’re running out of places to hunt, to scavenge. Jess hasn’t brought in any big game in weeks, and we’re stuck scavenging the same goddamn, overrun areas over and over. All we have left is the theme park and the airport. And if you think we won’t suffer causalities at either location, you’re wrong.”

Richard’s struggling in his own denial. He shifts the blame away from everyone but himself, because the guilt is settling in, and he’s running out of places to store them. It’s a sad affair, to see someone as strong and level-headed as Richard struggling, but this isn’t his world any more. This isn’t a place where he can thrive and embrace his role. Everything is changing around him, but he really isn’t. One thing’s going to give, sooner or later.

“People look up to you, Rich. They trust and believe in you. If you would just listen to reason, we could get out of here before it’s too late. Before the zulus come knocking at our door.” He’s done talking. Henry doesn’t want to just walk away from Rich mid-conversation, but he doesn’t have anything left to say.

“We have a truck now and if you have your way I am sure we will come home with another one after this supply run. We can travel farther to hunt, supply runs. It can be done. We can bring more items here to make this place safe again.”

Richard does has less faith in his own words but he does his best for it to not come out that way. They just need more supplies that is all. More supplies and they can make this place safe for every one. Not everyone is a trained fighter. So of their group won’t make it long out there on their own. Richard just wants them all to be safe and this has to be the way to do that.

When Henry stops talking Richard pauses for a second. “Out there, more people will die. I am looking out of those who can’t protect their selves here. James died right here. Out there, where is it more dangerous and no where is safe, more people would be dead by now.” While Henry might not walk away mid-converstation, Richard will. It is the only way to end the argument he feels.

Off Balanced || Richard & OPEN

[deputyrichard-blog]

Morning Routine|| Richard & Open

It was times when Richard went outside to start his morning workout that he was glad for the start of cooler days. At least now it would feel a bit better as he sweated from the run or exercises. He was also glad for having a good pair of tennis shoes still. Sure the steel toe boots were more handy most of the time, but when running laps, not the best.

Richard slips his feet into the shoes and starts out the door. The morning air is a bit cooler then he expected. He knows the minute he starts moving he won’t even notice it. If he were going on a patrol he might go in for a jacket. But now it would just get into his way. He takes the few steps off the porch to give himself enough room to start a few stretches before taking off for his circles around the fence. Richard had barely started with the front door opened to the house.

“Good morning.” Richard greeted them with a smile. “I’m just about to go on a run if you want to come along.” The offer hung in the air as Richard stopped stretching to give his full attention to the person on the porch.

[deputyrichard-blog]

He’s alright with letting Richard make excuses for James’s death. If that’s what he needs to do to cope and deal with his death, that’s fine. Henry doesn’t feel the need to do the same. He knows exactly what went wrong and that James’s death could have been prevented, maybe. The what-ifs can drown you, if you let them, so Henry doesn’t. Rich is soft, but not in a bad way. In a human way that Henry relates to and also doesn’t understand.

Henry sighs. Even after all of the death around them, Rich doesn’t get it. Getting more supplies isn’t going to bring James back from the dead, and it sure as hell isn’t going to stop more people from dying. Henry’s trying to be patient, he’s looking to the Lord for guidance on this issue. While he respects Richard’s opinion and his drive, Henry can’t help but curse his narrow-mindedness. Rich sees the world one way and one way only, and it’s that black and white philosophy that’s going to get him and those around him killed.

“Christ, Rich. How can you not get it after all that’s happened. We’re trying to fix a bullet wound with a goddamn band-aid.” Henry drops the dish towel down on the counter in front of him. He turns to face him, leaving the couple of inches between them as a buffer. Annoyance flares inside of him and he tries to stifle it. “You’re smarter than this. I know you are.”

Richard doesn’t expect Henry reaction. He sets the old dish rag he was using to wash down on the edge of the sink. He lets out a sigh. He didn’t expect the reaction he was getting now. Richard know that coming or going they need more supplies. They had voted to stay. He wasn’t the only one who voted this way. It wasn’t one to thirteen.

Pinching the bridge of his nose Richard tried to hide his own annoyance. They both wanted what was best for the group, while they disagreed on what they was, they both had the same goal and Richard reminded himself that. “It is wasn’t for the storm there would be nothing to fix. That fence was perfectly fine and could have held back a couple of zeds if it was before. We don’t even know if the zeds would have came this way if not for the storm.”

Maybe Richard needed something to blame other then himself. The storm seemed as good of a place as any to place that fault he wanted to place on himself. In Richards mind this came down to Henry wanted to leave and the group, at least part of them, knowing staying would keep more safe if they could rebuild. They just needed more supplies, that was all. “Because I disagree with you does not hinder my intelligence Henry. Building the fence back will stop any more incidents from happening at the farm.”

Off Balanced || Richard & OPEN

[deputyrichard-blog]

“It’s not your fault, you know,” Henry says after a long stretch of silence. He feels uncomfortable comforting Rich, but he doesn’t thn he’s equipped to deal with the situation. Rich was a small town deputy. He helped old ladies cross the street and knew everyone in his tiny town. Having one of their own die is heavy, it’ll drag you down without a chance of surfacing for breath. Having someone die on the farm house property, at base camp, is terrifying. It’s where 

Rich and the people who trusted Rich to make the right decision thought they were safe, and now that idea isn’t as solid as it was. Henry doesn’t blame him. How could he? Rich was just a man. He can’t predict the future, and he can’t pretend to know what’ll happen. All they can do is pray that their reasoning is just and that their choices are correct. Richard guessed wrong.

“What we do from here is what matters.”

Richard doesn’t know what to think or do when Henry’s says it isn’t he fault. He pauses, dish is one hand as he forgets for a moment how to keep washing. He takes a second before he keeps going. He finishes the next plate in his hand before he answers.

“It was the storm. It is didn’t come through the fence would be fine and James would be alive.” Richard tries to brush it off. Even if he does blame himself he can’t admit that to Henry. It was the storms fault, no one in particular, at least that is how Richard is playing it off that he believes. He washed another dish before handing it over.

Richard nods. The supply run is needed. They are running low on two many things that they need and are important. They need food, medical supplies, anything to fix the fence. They need to get the defenses back up. Protect the house and the group better then before. Richard hopes they will take the truck to stock up on any wood or other items they can find. “Hopefully the supply run will prove to show up with more items we need.”

Off Balanced || Richard & OPEN

[deputyrichard-blog]

The offer is turned down, Colton still stands there. He won’t mind placing everything where it needs to be. Death still looms over everything in the house and keeps Colton from complaining about anything, even putting dishes away. No quips about the necessity of paper plates or take out boxes is made to make the room feel less tense. Richard is lost in his head, and he seems bothered. While Colton isn’t very empathetic, he’s shared a room with this man for a few months now.

As the clean plates are passed off, Colton gives them a quick drying and stacks them in the cabinets. Plates to one side, bowls to the other, and cups on the shelf above. Silverware is assigned to a drawer he only knows about because he’s helped Maya and James do dishes enough times, and cooking utensils have a spot all their own. It makes him think of his old apartment with Logan, how they both bickered when she left things laying around. He starts to whistle a tune to accompanying the sound of Richard scrubbing the dishes, and to break the stifling silence.

“Hmm?” he’s lost enough in his own thoughts- or rather, lack of- that he hardly catches Richard’s question. He does file back a few seconds before it fully registers, and Colton can’t help but shrug. “It’s unexpected considering what’s just happened. Not to mention I’ll be the only one in that group who doesn’t skillfully know how to fire a gun.” It’ll be him and that bat that he’s been toting around, and that is not at all comforting. “I’m surprised you or Leo aren’t in my place, to be honest.”

“At least you know there will be three people there who will be watching your back.” Richard doesn’t like the idea of them looking for another car. One was enough for supply runs and to get what they need back to the farm. While he maybe a bit less at the top of the farm house list right now for people who are a hundred percent certain staying is the best, he knows a second care is meant in case they need to leave.

Richard isn’t ready to leave yet. He isn’t ready for more death and living on the move trying to keep everyone safe with out a house to do so. He still believes that staying is the number one way to keep the most of people safe. Even if he is proven to be wrong, he just wants everyone safe. “I am sure you will do fine and everything will go as planned.”

Drying his hand on the bottom of his shift Richard moves away from the sink. The dishes are clean, dried, and put away. There is nothing else for Richard to do inside to keep his hands busy and keep himself from not over thinking again and again about how the vote went. “Thanks for the help Colton. I need to clean my gun before the next patrol.” He nods before heading out of the room.

Off Balanced || Richard & OPEN

[deputyrichard-blog]

The voting results are unsurprising. His way of thinking is slowly working over the group. Last time they voted, it was a heavy majority to stay. Now, they’re at a perfect split. It’s slow and steady progress, but it’s not enough for Henry to be happy. They’re moving too slow, and only bad things are catching up to them. The group disperses as the vote and supply run are organized, and there is still a lot of work that needs to be done before they leave. Henry is out there with the best of them, and he comes back inside, sweaty and gross, after most people have finished with dinner already. 

Richard isn’t who Henry expects to be doing dishes. Maya, Layne, or even Colton, sure. But there he is, scrubbing away like he can eradicate the Z4 virus if he scrubs hard enough. Henry falls in beside him, picking up what used to be a t-shirt to dry the dishes that Rich is washing. It must be strange, to see them in there, doing dishes instead of labor or working with weapons.

“I expected you to look more happy.” In the past, Henry’s words would have been laced with some much more bitter and jaded. He can’t hold the vote against Richard any more. He may be a poster boy for staying at the farm house, but Rich firmly and truly believes it’s the best thing to do. Most of the people behind him are lost and scared. They’d rather stay behind because it’s easier and seems safer. But James’s death has proven that despite Richard’s good intentions, that sentiment isn’t right. No where is safe right now, and the sooner they all realize that, the sooner they can move on.

Henry gets no pleasure out of being right. There won’t be any “i told you so”s, and Henry isn’t smug in the slightest. James was not his favorite person. Their past was complicated and strange, and they had just been on the road to recovery when he died. Henry carries around his own guilt at what happened. Maybe, if he had put the rule in sooner, James would be alive. Maybe if he had spent less time outside, working on the fence and patrolling, he could have been there to offer help. The what-ifs and maybes could crush him with their weigt along, if he let them, so he doesn’t.

Richard had enjoyed the silence while it lasted. When Henry feel into place beside him he was certain that it wasn’t going to be an conversation he wanted. But the words shockingly didn’t hold any sting. He looked over to make sure it was actually Henry there.

He didn’t answer for a minute though. Just washed two more plates before handing them over to Henry. It had to be a strange picture. The two of them doing dishes when the chore was normally left to those who didn’t have combat skills. Richard needed an easy distraction though. The dishes gave that, or did.

“We just lost a member of our group, happy isn’t the top of my list of things I am feeling at the moment.” Richard handed over another plate with the comment. While Richard knew he shouldn’t blame himself he still did. He still knew more people would be gone if they left, it is why he still voted to stay. But still, he couldn’t deny staying was why James’ wasn’t there anymore.

Off Balanced || Richard & OPEN

[deputyrichard-blog]

After sitting through the vote, Colton began feeling antsy. It’s a normal welcomed feeling that he missed amongst all of his apathy and self-loathing. He’s been told in the beginning he was useless, and he always brushed it off until right after nothing more rang true. He’d hoped that with his vote it could grant them the opportunity to leave, and in a way it negated his inability to break away from his cycle old mistakes.

The outcome though stated they stay, and now his nerves are buzzing. It’s stifled still, not as strong as the usual feeling of jumping under his own skin, but the sense of entrapment feels more suffocating than ever. They aren’t going anywhere, and Colton wants to take off his collected mask and yell at them all for being idiots. James’s death is a blaring red example as to why they should, and he feels dumb-struck knowing that some people, as Henry has stated, are still complacent.

Luckily Colton has no trouble keeping his feelings in check and he takes the outcome in stride. Time to work with what they got, like he’s told Cam before. Dwelling won’t do much, and he doesn’t want to frustrate himself, he’s too tired for that. He collects some dishes to bring to the sink in the kitchen. Cleaning up is the most he can offer while in the house, and he’s not going to bother combat-class residents to go with him for a walk. Keeping his hands busy is important, though, and he intends to do so by cleaning up. Richard beat him to it, it seems.

Colton walks up beside him and delicately places his small stack of collected dishes onto the counter. Richard would be more useful elsewhere, he figures, so he does offer a suggestion. “I can clean these if you have to do anything else.” Patrols are ongoing, and Richard is one of the main people who does them. Even if he has time before, he could relax if he hands the menial chore of cleaning off to Colton who has nothing better to do with his time.

“I got it. If you would like to put them way though.” It just a suggestion. Keeping the dishes actually put away might seem a bit silly not but they still do it. It was just one of the things that helped make the house feel more normal. Something that most people hated doing, putting away and cleaning dishes, was now something that connected Richard back to before.

He washes in silence for a bit. Slowly going over each plate trying to make it last as long as possible. It’s busy work, nothing else. But Richard needs busy work right now. He stands by his vote, but there is still a small amount of doubt that is starting to form in the back of his head. Richard doesn’t like being anything but a hundred percent certain.

So Richard looks for more of a distraction. “How do you feel about going on the supply run?” Colton seem surprised when he name was called out. Richard had wanted a chance to go back to the hardware store, but he knows if they go that way Henry will make sure to check it out if safe.

Off Balanced || Richard & OPEN

[deputyrichard-blog]

----

No Rest // Henry && Richard

deputyrichard:

Richard stands there. He can’t seem to find words as Maya and Henry talk about what happened. He can tell she isn’t doing well thought and he reaches his hand out, touching her shoulder, a small sign of comfort until Henry tells her she can take off.

Someone is dead. Someone is dead on the farm. They weren’t out on patrols. They didn’t even leave the grounds. Richard thought that being here could protect them over anything. James’ wasn’t combat trained. Would he have died even sooner if they had left? Richard’s brain is like a ping pong ball going back and forth and he tries to shake it clear.

In the end he just clears his throat. “I’ll go check on Jess. I’ll see if she needs any help with cleaning and fixing up out there.”

Maya nods at him, walking away, and her steps are heavy and fearful back to the house. The death has shaken her down to the core, and he’s sure the others aren’t fairing any better. he’ll have the assess the situation further, on an individual basis as people grieve and reaction differently. He can only imagine what Colton’s feeling right now. Unless the kid did it on purpose… no, he wouldn’t. And even if he would, he wouldn’t dare. They were in the wrong place at the wrong time, and Colton ran as James froze.

Henry’s hand shoots out, perhaps a little too fast. He feels Richard’s biceps tense under the sudden touch and he stops in his tracks. Henry’s just as on edge as Richard is; death isn’t easy on anybody’s soul. He owes Rich, big time. The man saved his life. Henry knows it won’t make them even, but he feels like he’d be remiss to stay nothing.

“It’s not your fault, Rich. Whatever you’re thinking right now, don’t blame yourself.” And then Henry lets go of him, walking past Richard towards the house. There’s no need for both of them to go out there. It’d be like gathering a group to go look at a car crash. Instead, he waits patiently for the first signs of his sister, praying for James under his breath to fill in the silence.

[deputyrichard-blog]

Off Balanced || Richard & OPEN

Richard held onto the sheet of paper for the vote much longer then he did the first time. The words looked exactly the same, yet it took him a moment to really think about what he wanted. He starred at it, looking up just to see other people walk forward with their votes, his brows furrowed and he pinches the bridge of his nose as he thinks.

Richard assumed if people died it would be because they left. This house was suppose to be their safety. Those in the group who couldn’t protect their selves wouldn’t do as well out there. It would be dangerous, people would die, that is why they needed to stay. But someone had died here. Died in the yard of the house that Richard argued with everyone was the best protected place for them. The safest place.

He blamed himself. It was clear really to anyone who paid attention and he was sure their had to be those in the house who also blamed him. But only one person had died here. Out there, the number would be higher, right? Richard sighed louder then he meant too before circling his vote and folding the paper in half. He didn’t realize he was the last one to bring it forward.

Richard was shocked with the out come. Sure that more people who vote to leave after what happened. But when Henry says they are staying Richard isn’t fully sure how else he feels besides shocked. He knows this means he needs to make sure this place is even more protected. They start talking about what is needed from the supply run and Richard makes sure he mentions the hardware store from before.

As lunch start to end Richard stays behind to clean up the dishes. Place then all into the sink he starts washing more focused on it then who ever else is in the kitchen with him.