dndvoyages-blog

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Nothing but love

There’s absolutely nothing in this world that compares to the love he has for me. I’ve never been in a relationship that I felt so secure and safe.

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I wish I could dedicate my life to taking care of you and our future.

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This is our first time meeting in this 7 month relationship

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My first and favorite photo of us together, I can't get enough of it.

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The time came!!!!

Our vacation together was a blast, I finally got to meet him. More posts to come!!

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T minus 3 days!

In 3 days Dawson will be here and he better be prepared for an adventure if a lifetime! It's going to be his birthday week with me and our anniversary fall within that week. Stay tuned for updates on where we travel on this little island we call home.

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Insecurities

After looking at countless photos of women on social media, I see how much they've changed since high school and some people I don't even know but they are all beautiful. I get this sense of Jealousy, like I want to be that beautiful, or I wish I could dress that way if my body was a different shape or size, I wish I could do my make up that way. As I say all these things to myself I can hear his voice inside my head telling me how beautiful I am and that he loves me for me. He tells me how he loves my eyes, my hair, curves and all. I realize I love myself. They're all beautiful and I am too. That's what I call secure.

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Update on the book I sent him: FedEx reported to me that the package that arrived in Reno was empty...so he just threw it away. I was so upset, how could my package be empty?! So I had to file a claim and what not. I was frustrated for a while trying to figure out how i was going to send him another one but instead he's been reading off pictures with me. We take turns reading and we read at least one chapter per night. First time I've done something like this.

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Sweet Nothings

We always whisper to each other sweet nothings when the other one falls asleep. I just did it to him as he's fast asleep on the line, and he woke up. Not sure if he'll remember this but as I was whispering he got up and said, "just remember I love you, I love you, I love you so much, *kisses phone* okay baby girl!?" And that just took my heart. God I love him.

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First time I fought so hard with myself, trying not to show emotions.

Tonight he said goodnight but this time he hung up the video call and it felt wrong to not sleep with him on the line. Talk about clingy! I’m in trouble, I am growing more and more attached to this fine, young, gentlemen and I sure as hell can’t hide it.

He knew something was wrong and it was partially because of the way he said goodnight, I made a face. It was like he was in a rush to end the video call that’s why, and he didn’t even say “I love you.” He says it all the time, why would it hurt me when he doesn’t say it?! *clears throat* clingy I tell you.

Solution to it all, he could tell through the text message I sent him and so he ended up calling me to make sure I was okay and I don’t go to bed angry or sad. I’d like to think I was crying because I was sad but I think I was crying because I realized no matter what he always tries to find a way to make me happy. Keep in mind that it’s 8:30 pm here so that’s 11:00 pm there. He should’ve been asleep by this time but instead he decides to call me until I was feeling better. He was very apologetic and said he doesn’t want me to go to bed angry and that he loves me.

**realize how selfish I was for keeping him up? Man I felt bad even if he claims to not be tired**

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The first couple times I watched a video of daws singing this song, it brought tears to my eyes. I absolutely love the way my baby sings, his voice is so deep and I love it.

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Suspension

All morning I was excited to hear from my love at lunch time. The moment I clocked out, I had realized that we talked about it earlier in the morning that we wouldn't talk long. I told him, "it's okay, enjoy your 15 minutes, you don't have to call me." I was devastated, how did I not remember that my phone was suspended and that we weren't going to talk on lunch. I started talking to myself, saying "I can do this, hmm what can I do if we're not going to talk, I can do this...haaaw, I hope he calls, I hope he calls..." About 10 minutes later, my phone rang and it was him! "I'm sorry babe, I didn't want to call because I didn't know if you were on break or not (it varies depending on how busy I am), but I had to at least hear you, I was feeling a bit down, so I had to call." With four minutes on the clock, we told each other how we felt and that we love each other. As soon as we hung up, sadness hit me again. It's really difficult but I'll stay strong for my baby. *You have no idea how happy you make me Dawson.*

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Along the lines of Jealousy

I had gotten a little jealous because he told me that he hugged his friend at work and had his hand on her head. He was thinking about how short I was compared to him so he smiled. She had no clue. He asked her, “how tall are you?”, “five feet two…” she says. If He were hugging me, I’d be about 2 to 3 inches taller than her. As soon as he went into his truck he sighed and said, “haw, Daisylynn!” It’s what he and I both say when we long for each other. Moments like that makes us miss each other more. He called me and told me, “wow you really are short.”

Of course I got jealous because I want to be the one he hugs, but I can’t. I didn’t tell him I was jealous because he was thinking of me when he did it. It was no real reason to be jealous either because I hug my friends too.

Later on in the night I asked him, “uhm, what if I told you I got jealous about something, would you look at me differently?”, “like what?” He said. “Oh you know, like other girls.” He replied, “of course not, I would change whatever it was. I’d do anything to make you happy.” I can’t believe he said that, but of course I would never ask such a thing from him. That would be selfish of me.

As we headed to bed, we FaceTimed to chat a little bit longer. “So, what made you jealous?” He asked. “Nothing…” as I shook my head with a grin. At this point I was already content with what he had said earlier. Realizing how insecure I was becoming, I stopped myself. “Come on babe, we’re supposed to tell each other things.” I said, “well, right now it’s not too bad, I’m not that jealous because it’s something small and silly but if i open up to you about it, it might become something and I know it’s going to be a thought in the back of your mind, so no…I don’t want to tell you.” It took him a little bit to understand but when he did he told me, “it’s okay, It’s not like I’m going to force you to tell me, but don’t be jealous.” I stared as he went on, “…no, no, no, don’t feel that way babe, there’s nothing for you to be jealous about. You’re my one and only.” As he shook his head. At that moment tears came falling out of my eyes and I had to hide my face from him. Little did he know a part of me cried because I was happy, I’ve never felt so secure with someone before. Another part of me cried because it hurt when reality hit me and told me I couldn’t hug him at that instant. I know I’m going to be happy in life with him. I love him so much.

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Reason 2: I wake up to messages like this.

Don't mind all the grammatical errors, I like to think part of it's because he was half asleep when he typed it. "u kno i seriously cant wait to marry uu f'realz, i want u soo frekn bad u have nooo idea babe♥️🌹I just wanna lay to next to u, or u lay ontop of me, anything dat involves u being by myside, soo i can kiss u day and night, i just want uu😍 I love how we support eachother and we alwayz text, call, message, snap, anything just to let eachother kno how were doing and just ve random and funny☺️😊 i couldnt ask fo anymo other than still wanting u hea😂 one day🌹 I love u sooo much Daisylynn, my one in and only one😊"

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The night he sang to me through Snapchat videos 😭 I swear he has the voice of a god.

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I want...

To be the one you come home to each and every day, be there beside you when you fall asleep and when you awaken, the one who supports you when no one else wants to, believe in you when you don’t believe in yourself, help you with any obstacle life will throw at you, encourage you, help you achieve your goals and make your dreams come true. I want to be the only one for you.