dokyccis

[dokyccis]

₊˚⊹ bf!haechan texts | 이동혁

warnings: mentions of breaking up

a/n: guys this is my man

[dokyccis]

₊˚⊹ ᰔ mingyu as your bf

mingyu x gn!reader

• your friends or even people you casually know see mingyu as a scary person. when he’s out with you and your friends, he looks so intimidating to everyone it’s overwhelming sometimes.

• although they think that of mingyu, only you know your boyfriend’s real behaviour; at least around you.

• mingyu acts like a baby stuck in an adult’s body when he’s with you. like when you‘re chilling normally and peacefully, and he comes from the other side of the room just to hug you and hide is face in the crook of your neck, almost demanding love and care from you. if you don't give him kisses and cuddle him, he'll get very pouty!

• mingyu cherishes the littlest and most simple moments you have. like when he has his head in your lap and your hands are playing with his hair, he totally melts under your touch and nestles himself even more in you.

• this boy is more in love with you than anyone else could ever be. the way he looks at you with sparkling eyes and a lovely smile is never ignored by you or someone who notices it. mingyu just loves the sight of you and your gorgeous features, he could look at you all day.

• if you're out and doesn't answer his calls, boy will get WORRIED. he'll start messaging you like crazy asking where are you at and why aren't you answering his calls, and if you don't answer then he'll start going insane. he'll call his members, saying that you don't answer his calls and is nowhere to be seen for about 7 hours, and bros would be like ?? dude they're just around the city partying with their friends, calm tf down?? poor mingoo, he's just worried :(

• he likes to see you interacting with his members, it warms his heart a lot <3 but if you don't defend him in a game, he'll get mad and pouty. he'd ask "baby why did you defend hoshi but you didn't defend ME????" and you'd be like "mingyu you literally cheated"

• waking up next to mingyu in the morning is your favorite moment of the day. his head is laying in your chest while his arms are hugging your waist tightly, (change my mind about little spoon mingyu) his heavy breath hitting your skin. you smile with the vision of that huge man all glued to your body and curled up in the sheets, giggling to yourself because of the duality your boyfriend has.

• whenever he sees some cute or funny video, he immediately shares it with you. you two laugh together and mingyu's heart races with the soft sound of your laugh, he's just so in love with you and he's totally aware of it :(( he shows you these videos just to hear your hearty laugh <3

• mingyu can be jealous sometimes, and he's very clear with it; boy tries to hide it, but it ends up he can't. if someone DARES!!! to mess with his baby, he'll get mad MAD. you'd ask him what is wrong because of his expression, and he'll be like "nothing, y/n. nothing." and then you notice right away he's just jealous. how to make him relax? kiss him :)

• when you show up in svt's set to see and support the members, mingyu is just so happy :(( the way he runs to give you a hug and kiss your face, he can't stop smiling because his partner is so supportive and sweet!!! "y'all, they came to see me!" mingyu says happily, making you melt of how adorable he could be sometimes. when they're back to shooting, mingyu tries to look cool just to impress you — and it turns out he really impresses you :)

• conclusion? gyu loves you so much sometimes it overflows! <3

[dokyccis]

i would’ve broken up with renjun like 💀💀 THERE WASN’T REALLY AN EXPLANATION. kick him OUTTTT GIVE ME THE ANGST AND GIVE ME THE CLOSURE Y/N DESERVES! / lh

anyways i love love love your writing, you’re seriously amazing!! i hope you have an amazing day!

THE WAY I WOULD’VE KICKED HIS ASS OUT OF MY LIFE I WAS YN TOO!!!! but yk i wanted to give it a happy ending 🙈🙈

thank you so so much anon!! i hope ur day was amazing! 💗💗

[dokyccis]

the way this took me almost a moNTH is scaring my living out 🤓

busy II | h. renjun

it’s been a while !! // part one here.

“sometimes i wonder when are you gonna stop humiliating yourself because of renjun.” yunjin says in a serious, but ironic tone.

it’s been 2 weeks since renjun left you all alone in your apartment. the way your boyfriend left coldly still gives you goosebumps and you feel like crying with the thought of him not loving you anymore.

you’re insecure about all that, you don’t wanna believe your thoughts but you feel like you need to. you need to face reality and accept the truth.

“i don’t humiliate myself.” yunjin chuckles sarcastically when you finally answer. “do i?” you genuinely ask.

“do we really have to answer?” it’s karina’s turn to say something. “that’s obvious, honey. you just need to open your eyes and see what’s going on.” she’s realistic.

maybe they’re right, you think to yourself.

those were 2 weeks of pure silence between you and renjun, he didn’t message you or call you to ask how you’ve been or just to say hi.

you feel like the feeling that used to be like fire burning in yours and renjun’s heart is now dying little by little, and you don’t want that. does renjun want that? you wonder.

you still remember the sweet thoughts you shared with renjun in silent and calm nights at your place, the atmosphere matching the way you two looked at each other and talked to each other so lovingly.

you believed that renjun was the one & only for you and would always be, but destiny stabbed you with it’s tricks.

“y/n, come on! you need to move on, y’know?” yunjin encourages you.

“it’s not like we broke up, yunjin. he just left and…” you pause. “god, i sincerely don’t know what’s going on with renjun.” you sigh deeply and hide your face in your hands.

“he’s just an ass.” karina says, making yunjin laugh and being contaminated by the red haired girl.

you laugh along with your friends, trying to shrug the pain off. it’s like you lost a significant part of you, like your heart has a big hole that’s just filled up with renjun’s presence.

you’re afraid renjun just played with you all this time, but you also can’t believe that. his sweet words, delicate touch and innocent gaze leads you to think the otherwise.

you can’t imagine your life without renjun, your mind and heart refuses to even think of the possibility. you gave your whole self to renjun, dedicating each special part of you to him.

“he may be an asshole, but i still miss him.” you reveal.

“we know that, hun’.” yunjin says, ceasing her laugh. “it’s kind of normal to miss him, though. look what you’ve created within these past 3 years, you had a pretty admirable relationship with renjun, you two were like bee and honey.” she mocks, karina nods her head in agreement.

“it’s okay to miss him, babe, we’re not judging you for that. remember that we’re your best friends, we’re here to help you recover and stay safe over all of this.” karina smiles genuinely, and you can’t be happier to have friends like yours.

“thank you so much, you two.” you smile back, pulling your two best friends into a warm, comforting and loving hug.

a little bit wild, a little bit tamed

it’s the final line, isn’t it?

a little bit lost, a little bit saved

ain’t we all just a little bit hypocrite?

you sing along to your favorite song’s lyrics. all alone at home, you’re totally distracted by the song’s rhythm and melody, like nothing or anyone else could reach you in that moment.

the thin sound of your apartment’s bell leads you out of your own thoughts and immersion, echoing in your head until it gives you a minimum headache.

you get up from the couch, making your way to the front door to open it.

“who the fuck is bothering me this late?” you ask yourself, picking up the key standing in the little desk nearby the door. you open the door.

“hey, how can i help yo-” your body froze when you looked at the person standing in front of you.

it’s like you haven’t looked at renjun for a while, like you two spent 2 years without talking to each other. he looks devastated, and you feel sick with his presence.

you try to shut your door, but renjun doesn’t let you. “please, let’s talk.” he says in a calm and low tone.

your mind doesn’t wanna let him in, but your heart is weak for renjun and everything he does. if he wants something, then you’re giving it to him.

you sigh deeply, letting renjun in before shutting your door and following him to your couch.

you two sat there in silence. renjun was looking at his fingers, maybe thinking of what he could say to you. in the other side, you felt totally restless. your hands were sweating, your heart was beating fast and your vision started getting blurry.

renjun cleared his throat, gaining your attention. you look at him.

“i know i was very immature.” he assumed. “i’m sorry for that.” he looked at you, your gaze meeting.

you immediately look away, not handling keep eye contact with him. “that’s it?” you say without even thinking, the two words swimming out of your mouth.

renjun was taken aback by your response, you could sense the way atmosphere in the room got more tense than it already was.

“what… what do you mean?” he tilts his head towards you in confusion.

every word said by renjun made you feel more and more nervous, like your heart could explode at any moment. “i mean, you ghosted me for 2 weeks, you never explained me why you were acting like that…” you gain courage to look him in the eyes.

“i cannot accept your apology if you can’t explain me what’s happening.” you’re clear. renjun keeps looking at you, looking for answers in your eyes.

“i told you everything’s oka-” you cut him.

“it’s not okay, renjun!” you yell, getting up from the couch with an impulse. “you always say it’s okay, when it’s evidently not okay.” you burst, emphasizing the “not” in the phrase.

“y/n, calm do-” you cut him again.

“how can i calm down?! tell me, renjun! how the heck can i calm down? you didn’t contact me for 2 weeks, i cried everyday because i thought you didn’t love me,” you pause, sighing deeply before continuing. “and you want me to calm down?”

“look, if you came here just to bother the shit out of me, then leave.” your tone is heavy and serious. “i’m already too stressed and i really don’t wanna hear your stupid excuses anymo-” it’s renjun’s turn to cut you off.

“can you please hear me?” he speaks a little louder. “god, listen to me for once in your life!” he exclaims and you cross your arms, signing for him to continue.

“i’m sorry for ghosting you, i’m sorry for everything i did to you all this time.” he gets up from the couch, facing you. “i love you so much, y/n. you don’t even imagine how much it hurts to know that i made you feel like that.” he steps closer.

you feel your shoulders tense, your hands sweat again and your breath stop with him getting closer.

“y/n.” he takes you by the arm, hugging you tightly. “please, forgive me.” his voice is weak.

you feel the tears form in your eyes, threatening to fall and stain your whole face. renjun tightens up the hug even more when he noticed you didn’t answer him, wanting a minimum reaction from you.

“please, y/n.” he begs. “i know i messed up, i know i made stupid excuses, i know i should pay more attention to you.” renjun said, feeling the tears fall all over his face. “but please, stay.” he begs one more time.

you can’t control yourself, hugging renjun back and crying like a newborn baby in renjun’s arms. his whispered-apologies could still be heard by you, followed by his hands going to your hair and a kiss being deposited in your forehead.

“please, i’m so sorry. please forgive me, y/n.” he begs for the third time.

your heart melted over renjun’s broken tone. you couldn’t handle one more week away from him, so you didn’t think twice before saying:

“i forgive you, jun.”

renjun looked at you with wide eyes, a smiling growing in his face and lightening up his dark eyes. “a-are you serious?” he stuttered. you nod in agreement.

the boy hugs you again, but this time the embrace is filled with happiness and relief. you smile, your arms still wrapped around his body.

“thank you so much, y/n.” renjun thanks you. “i swear i’ll never do that again, i swear to god.” he says without letting go, making you feel safe in his arms after a long time feeling empty when hugging him.

you spend minutes hugging renjun, hearing him apologize to you more than he should and hearing him trying his best to convince you he would never do that again.

the love, affection and admiration that used to be like fire burning in your heart now feels like it again. your love battery with renjun is finally charging itself up after so much time.

you felt like you just returned home and you really don’t wanna ever leave again.

“renjun, we spent about 10 minutes hugging,” you point out. “i think we can pull away, can’t we?”

“let’s stay like this for a little longer, please.” he asks, burrying his face in your neck. you giggle with your boyfriend’s attitude, whispering sweet things and melting in the pleasure sensation that genuine touch gave you.

[dokyccis]

busy II | h. renjun

it’s been a while !! // part one here.

“sometimes i wonder when are you gonna stop humiliating yourself because of renjun.” yunjin says in a serious, but ironic tone.

it’s been 2 weeks since renjun left you all alone in your apartment. the way your boyfriend left coldly still gives you goosebumps and you feel like crying with the thought of him not loving you anymore.

you’re insecure about all that, you don’t wanna believe your thoughts but you feel like you need to. you need to face reality and accept the truth.

“i don’t humiliate myself.” yunjin chuckles sarcastically when you finally answer. “do i?” you genuinely ask.

“do we really have to answer?” it’s karina’s turn to say something. “that’s obvious, honey. you just need to open your eyes and see what’s going on.” she’s realistic.

maybe they’re right, you think to yourself.

those were 2 weeks of pure silence between you and renjun, he didn’t message you or call you to ask how you’ve been or just to say hi.

you feel like the feeling that used to be like fire burning in yours and renjun’s heart is now dying little by little, and you don’t want that. does renjun want that? you wonder.

you still remember the sweet thoughts you shared with renjun in silent and calm nights at your place, the atmosphere matching the way you two looked at each other and talked to each other so lovingly.

you believed that renjun was the one & only for you and would always be, but destiny stabbed you with it’s tricks.

“y/n, come on! you need to move on, y’know?” yunjin encourages you.

“it’s not like we broke up, yunjin. he just left and…” you pause. “god, i sincerely don’t know what’s going on with renjun.” you sigh deeply and hide your face in your hands.

“he’s just an ass.” karina says, making yunjin laugh and being contaminated by the red haired girl.

you laugh along with your friends, trying to shrug the pain off. it’s like you lost a significant part of you, like your heart has a big hole that’s just filled up with renjun’s presence.

you’re afraid renjun just played with you all this time, but you also can’t believe that. his sweet words, delicate touch and innocent gaze leads you to think the otherwise.

you can’t imagine your life without renjun, your mind and heart refuses to even think of the possibility. you gave your whole self to renjun, dedicating each special part of you to him.

“he may be an asshole, but i still miss him.” you reveal.

“we know that, hun’.” yunjin says, ceasing her laugh. “it’s kind of normal to miss him, though. look what you’ve created within these past 3 years, you had a pretty admirable relationship with renjun, you two were like bee and honey.” she mocks, karina nods her head in agreement.

“it’s okay to miss him, babe, we’re not judging you for that. remember that we’re your best friends, we’re here to help you recover and stay safe over all of this.” karina smiles genuinely, and you can’t be happier to have friends like yours.

“thank you so much, you two.” you smile back, pulling your two best friends into a warm, comforting and loving hug.

a little bit wild, a little bit tamed

it’s the final line, isn’t it?

a little bit lost, a little bit saved

ain’t we all just a little bit hypocrite?

you sing along to your favorite song’s lyrics. all alone at home, you’re totally distracted by the song’s rhythm and melody, like nothing or anyone else could reach you in that moment.

the thin sound of your apartment’s bell leads you out of your own thoughts and immersion, echoing in your head until it gives you a minimum headache.

you get up from the couch, making your way to the front door to open it.

“who the fuck is bothering me this late?” you ask yourself, picking up the key standing in the little desk nearby the door. you open the door.

“hey, how can i help yo-” your body froze when you looked at the person standing in front of you.

it’s like you haven’t looked at renjun for a while, like you two spent 2 years without talking to each other. he looks devastated, and you feel sick with his presence.

you try to shut your door, but renjun doesn’t let you. “please, let’s talk.” he says in a calm and low tone.

your mind doesn’t wanna let him in, but your heart is weak for renjun and everything he does. if he wants something, then you’re giving it to him.

you sigh deeply, letting renjun in before shutting your door and following him to your couch.

you two sat there in silence. renjun was looking at his fingers, maybe thinking of what he could say to you. in the other side, you felt totally restless. your hands were sweating, your heart was beating fast and your vision started getting blurry.

renjun cleared his throat, gaining your attention. you look at him.

“i know i was very immature.” he assumed. “i’m sorry for that.” he looked at you, your gaze meeting.

you immediately look away, not handling keep eye contact with him. “that’s it?” you say without even thinking, the two words swimming out of your mouth.

renjun was taken aback by your response, you could sense the way atmosphere in the room got more tense than it already was.

“what… what do you mean?” he tilts his head towards you in confusion.

every word said by renjun made you feel more and more nervous, like your heart could explode at any moment. “i mean, you ghosted me for 2 weeks, you never explained me why you were acting like that…” you gain courage to look him in the eyes.

“i cannot accept your apology if you can’t explain me what’s happening.” you’re clear. renjun keeps looking at you, looking for answers in your eyes.

“i told you everything’s oka-” you cut him.

“it’s not okay, renjun!” you yell, getting up from the couch with an impulse. “you always say it’s okay, when it’s evidently not okay.” you burst, emphasizing the “not” in the phrase.

“y/n, calm do-” you cut him again.

“how can i calm down?! tell me, renjun! how the heck can i calm down? you didn’t contact me for 2 weeks, i cried everyday because i thought you didn’t love me,” you pause, sighing deeply before continuing. “and you want me to calm down?”

“look, if you came here just to bother the shit out of me, then leave.” your tone is heavy and serious. “i’m already too stressed and i really don’t wanna hear your stupid excuses anymo-” it’s renjun’s turn to cut you off.

“can you please hear me?” he speaks a little louder. “god, listen to me for once in your life!” he exclaims and you cross your arms, signing for him to continue.

“i’m sorry for ghosting you, i’m sorry for everything i did to you all this time.” he gets up from the couch, facing you. “i love you so much, y/n. you don’t even imagine how much it hurts to know that i made you feel like that.” he steps closer.

you feel your shoulders tense, your hands sweat again and your breath stop with him getting closer.

“y/n.” he takes you by the arm, hugging you tightly. “please, forgive me.” his voice is weak.

you feel the tears form in your eyes, threatening to fall and stain your whole face. renjun tightens up the hug even more when he noticed you didn’t answer him, wanting a minimum reaction from you.

“please, y/n.” he begs. “i know i messed up, i know i made stupid excuses, i know i should pay more attention to you.” renjun said, feeling the tears fall all over his face. “but please, stay.” he begs one more time.

you can’t control yourself, hugging renjun back and crying like a newborn baby in renjun’s arms. his whispered-apologies could still be heard by you, followed by his hands going to your hair and a kiss being deposited in your forehead.

“please, i’m so sorry. please forgive me, y/n.” he begs for the third time.

your heart melted over renjun’s broken tone. you couldn’t handle one more week away from him, so you didn’t think twice before saying:

“i forgive you, jun.”

renjun looked at you with wide eyes, a smiling growing in his face and lightening up his dark eyes. “a-are you serious?” he stuttered. you nod in agreement.

the boy hugs you again, but this time the embrace is filled with happiness and relief. you smile, your arms still wrapped around his body.

“thank you so much, y/n.” renjun thanks you. “i swear i’ll never do that again, i swear to god.” he says without letting go, making you feel safe in his arms after a long time feeling empty when hugging him.

you spend minutes hugging renjun, hearing him apologize to you more than he should and hearing him trying his best to convince you he would never do that again.

the love, affection and admiration that used to be like fire burning in your heart now feels like it again. your love battery with renjun is finally charging itself up after so much time.

you felt like you just returned home and you really don’t wanna ever leave again.

“renjun, we spent about 10 minutes hugging,” you point out. “i think we can pull away, can’t we?”

“let’s stay like this for a little longer, please.” he asks, burrying his face in your neck. you giggle with your boyfriend’s attitude, whispering sweet things and melting in the pleasure sensation that genuine touch gave you.

[dokyccis]

ahhhh its been a while omg 😞 i felt so happy when i saw that this drabble hit +100 notes lol i miss july season !!! :(( super shy will always be so special to me omg this silly shit just means the world 2 me and will always dooo 🥹💗

super shy | l.hc

★ | pairing: bf!haechan x fem!reader

★ | genre: fluffy <3

★ | warnings: reader is super shy, haechan is shirtless, reader is a little insecure

★ | synopsis: after a long day, you just want to go home and be held by your dear boyfriend — but why can’t you express what you want just once in your life?

-

your days used to be tiring, even though sometimes you’d stay at home. you used to live alone in a little apartment in one of seoul’s most simple streets, but, after you started feeling like you’re alone in a dead-end-street, your boyfriend offered you to move in to his house.

today was a tiring and difficult day in work for you. you were tired of your boss complaining about this and that everyday, of your workmates screaming in the office making you lose concentration in the task you had to do and so many other things that happened.

at this point, you just needed haechan’s warmth. you just needed haechan’s velvety voice whispering lovely words in your ear and singing for you to sleep.

21:30 was painted white in your lockscreen as you was reaching the door of your shared apartment with haechan. you reached out your bag to get the apartament’s key, picking it up and unlocking the door in front of you.

"hyuck, i’m home!" you shout, hearing no response. "hyuck?" you repeat, until you hear shower noises coming from your shared bedroom.

as you came closer to the bedroom, you could hear haechan sing happily in the shower, making you giggle a little from the complains he would let out whenever he made a mistake.

"hyuck, i’m home." you said, leaning towards the bathroom door in your bedroom.

"oh, hi dear! didn’t hear you arrive, i’m getting out in a few seconds!" you heard haechan shout from inside the bathroom, just saying an "okay" as a response.

some seconds passed and haechan got out of the bathroom as promised. you look up to see your shirtless boyfriend with water dripping off his hair and curves, using just a black shorts and holding his towel on his shoulder. how can he look this good by just showering?

"y/n, you okay?" haechan asks, and you finally get down to earth again.

"what? no, i mean, yes! yes, i am." you answer, giggling in a very uncommon way, making haechan laugh at your behavior. "what’s so funny?"

"nothing, you’re just cute when you’re shy." he smiles, heading to the wardrobe to pick some random outfit, making you do nothing but follow him.

"i’m not shy! i’m just…" you pause.

"you’re just..?" he continues, waiting for your final answer.

"surprised." you simply answer, making him turn around to you and turn around to the wardrobe again, letting out a breathy giggle. "what?"

"nothing. sure, surprised." he says in a sarcastic way, finally sliding himself into a random shirt he found in the wardrobe.

you let out a sigh followed by a pouty expression, making haechan softly turn his attention to you. "how was your day, hun? you look tired." he asked.

"it was terribly tiring." you say, letting out another sigh. "my boss extra complained today and my workmates were just… so loud." you complained.

"yeah, i imagine… sorry about that." he says while drying his hair with the towel resting in his shoulder.

in your eyes, donghyuck looked like heaven by just drying his wet hair. were you so in love with him or he is just too good to be true?

you could stare at haechan for hours if you could, everything in him makes you mesmerized, from the bottom to the top of him. it’s magical how haechan can make you on your knees by just doing a simple action.

"y/n!" you heard him shout, flinching because of his voice's volume. "baby, are you really okay?"

you felt your cheeks burn as he called you "baby", making haechan smile and kiss your right cheek.

"you’re adorable." he says, patting your cheek and analyzing all the details present in your unique and beautiful face.

"what? w-what do you mean?" you ask nervously, feeling flustered by the way his eyes kept glued in yours.

"you’re all shy everytime i call you baby." he simply answers, earning nothing but a more red y/n.

"i’m not shy! you’re.. seeing things." you say, removing his hand off your cheek before, unconsciously, pouting.

"oh, sure. i’m seeing things." he laughs. "it’s kind of late for you to be awake since today was sort of tiring. go sleep, i’ll be beside you."

you love this about haechan, he cares about you and your health. in the morning, he would always wake you up with a kiss and tell you to go eat breakfast before leaving. you can never be more grateful for having haechan in your life.

-

"hey, i’m back." haechan smiles cutely, making his way to your shared bed and plopping by your side.

you already took the night’s bath, and now you’re laying in your bed with your sheets covering your whole body, but nothing seemed to comfort you like haechan does.

however, you’re afraid of asking haechan for some cuddles. why? because you don’t have courage enough to demonstrate your neediness to your boyfriend, you would always think that he would push you aside for being to "clingy" for your own good, so you prefere being shut about what you need than disturbing your oh-so-loved boyfriend.

"are you good? do you need anything?" he asks while looking at you and you just shake your head as a no. "'kay, then." he turns himself to face the side of the bed, so he could reach the interrupter and turn off the lights.

haechan went back to his place and placed his head on the fluffy pillow below him, muttering a lazy "good night" after pecking your lips softly.

you get flustered again by his action. every night haechan would give you a peck and a good night, but you always would get shy over this simple demonstration of love.

"it’s now or never." you think, wanting to ask haechan for what you want, but afraid of his reaction.

"haechan." you call, earning a hum as a response. "can we.." you pause. "can we please cuddle?" you say quickly, noticing haechan open his eyes since the room wasn’t too dark.

haechan starred at you for long seconds, making you more nervous than you already were. did he like your offer? did he think you’re too clingy? millions of questions rolled your mind in that moment.

"of course, come here." he opened his arms with a greeting smile, waiting for you to cling on him and sleep in his arms.

in the other hand, you couldn’t explain how happy and relieved you were. after so many times that you would always wonder if you should do this, you did and it came out well.

you smile and get into haechan's arms, feeling him close his arms around you and hold you close to his chest, bringing his hand to your hair and caressing it in the most soft way ever.

you felt secure in his arms, like nothing in the world could ever turn you down from now on, because you had haechan protecting you.

"you can always ask me for cuddles, you know." haechan said, earning your attention. "you don’t need to be shy, hun. i know you don’t ask me for it because you’re shy." he simply describes your own thoughts.

haechan knows you better than you do. he knows exactly what you need and what you think, that’s what you love so much about him.

"i’m just afraid that you won’t like it." you say, getting even closer to him. "i’m sorry, hyuck."

"you don’t need to be sorry, it’s not your fault." he comforted you. "i like every single moment with you, i like holding you like this, i like being around you, y/n." he bursted, love always present in his tone.

you somehow felt happy and butterflies dared to dance in your stomach after haechan's words. you feel loved around haechan, and you’re sure that’s what you want for your whole life.

you want to be like this forever, you want haechan to hold you and you want to hold him too, you want to be loved by haechan.

"i love you, y/n. do never forget that." he says, making you do nothing but flutter once again.

"even though i’m super shy around you?" you ask, moving your head up to face his angelic features.

"even though you’re super shy around me." he smiles, giving you a kiss once again, but longer this time.

the kiss was passionate, both of you were depositing all your love for each other in that simple act of love, that, even though it’s short, means a lot for you and for him too.

you pulled apart and saw haechan smile in happiness to have you in his arms, he felt like the luckiest man alive.

"i love you, bae. good night." he said once again.

"i love you too." you said, finally closing your eyes and traveling to the dreamland.

you were sure you would wake up with haechan holding you. you could doubt everything in the world, but you can’t doubt haechan's love for you.

he makes sure you know that he loves you unconditionally, everyday he makes sure you feel loved and comfortable around him, because that’s how he feels like when he’s around you.

even though you’re super shy.

[dokyccis]

i need a pt2 on the busy ff w renjun 🥹🥹

i’m currently writing this ff’s part two!! 🤧🤧 i’ll post it in a few <3

[dokyccis]

nahh i just noticed that i repeated “jaemin” so many times in this drabble, it feels so repititive i might explode

forever . na jaemin

your delicate hands held the knife calmly, going up and down to slice the fruits and greens. you gently pick the sliced food and put it in the orange bowl, separating it from the other ingredients.

your mind is empty, being refreshed by the morning atmosphere, the birds chirping beautifully and everything is in silence. it’s 7:30 am and you decided to wake up to make breakfast to you and your dear boyfriend.

jaemin lands home tired every single day, and you know it’s because of his hard work at the company and as a k-pop group member. you can sense the tiredness in his voice and see it in his eyes, the way it overflows makes you worried about his state.

you feel like you have to do something to make your boyfriend feel better than he already does everyday. as his partner, you need to make him feel loved and welcomed by you. you want him to feel special throughout this chaos he lives every day in his artist life.

you smile even bigger when you notice you were giggling like a fool while thinking about jaemin. you and him started dating for about 4 years ago, but you easily get flustered with the most innocent and sweet thoughts of him.

you continue to make a great and healthy breakfast for jaemin, tasting the food before keeping it. you feel very inspired this morning, maybe it’s love that makes you see bright colors shine outside the window even if it’s early in the morning. well, love is ubiquitous — it has no time to appear or to be practiced, right?

heavy steps are heard from the corridor, a slightly tall figure walking out from the shadow of it. jaemin had the usual sleepy face that made you melt, and you couldn’t bite back your smile.

“good morning, my love!” you exclaim, running to him and embracing his neck. you smile brightly to him, pressing kisses all over his face.

“good morning, hun.” he looks at you, placing his hands in your hips and analyzing your face. jaemin has the habit to stay silent while observing the tiniest details of your face, but special ones. those which makes you unique, which makes jaemin love you intensely.

you feel your cheeks burn, getting shy over jaemin’s gaze. “so…” you start. “i made you breakfast! since it’s your day off, i think you deserve being spoiled by me, don’t you think?” you grab his hand and lead him to the kitchen countertop, letting him see all the food you prepared.

“this is all mine?!” he asks, his eyes almost jumping out off his face.

“all yours, jaems!” a big smile grows in your face once again. you love the sight of jaemin’s soft side and you hope to see it forever until death tears you apart.

“thank you so much, love.” he smiles and hugs you tightly, filling the act with so much love. you both stay like this for a few seconds before jaemin pulls out of the hug, passing his hands through your hair softly.

jaemin cares your hair while paying so much attention to your beauty, his hands sliding down to your face just so he can appreciate what was his.

“you’re so beautiful.” jaemin whispers. you get flustered with his comment, your eyes breaking eye contact with his and looking at somewhere else. “look at me, hm?” he holds your chin, lifting your head up. “don’t look away when i’m talking to you.” he says softly.

he wraps your arms around his waist, his left hand holding your face and his right hand sliding down to hold your neck. “you know i’ll never get tired of complimenting you, right? you’re absolutely perfect in everything.” your eyes shine when the words come out of his mouth. “i love everything about you, y/n. i’m hardly in love with you, and i wanna feel like it forever.” he caress your cheek with his thumb.

“forever?” you ask, your voice is calm and low.

jaemin smiles and leans in to peck your lips, “forever.”

[dokyccis]

forever . na jaemin

your delicate hands held the knife calmly, going up and down to slice the fruits and greens. you gently pick the sliced food and put it in the orange bowl, separating it from the other ingredients.

your mind is empty, being refreshed by the morning atmosphere, the birds chirping beautifully and everything is in silence. it’s 7:30 am and you decided to wake up to make breakfast to you and your dear boyfriend.

jaemin lands home tired every single day, and you know it’s because of his hard work at the company and as a k-pop group member. you can sense the tiredness in his voice and see it in his eyes, the way it overflows makes you worried about his state.

you feel like you have to do something to make your boyfriend feel better than he already does everyday. as his partner, you need to make him feel loved and welcomed by you. you want him to feel special throughout this chaos he lives every day in his artist life.

you smile even bigger when you notice you were giggling like a fool while thinking about jaemin. you and him started dating for about 4 years ago, but you easily get flustered with the most innocent and sweet thoughts of him.

you continue to make a great and healthy breakfast for jaemin, tasting the food before keeping it. you feel very inspired this morning, maybe it’s love that makes you see bright colors shine outside the window even if it’s early in the morning. well, love is ubiquitous — it has no time to appear or to be practiced, right?

heavy steps are heard from the corridor, a slightly tall figure walking out from the shadow of it. jaemin had the usual sleepy face that made you melt, and you couldn’t bite back your smile.

“good morning, my love!” you exclaim, running to him and embracing his neck. you smile brightly to him, pressing kisses all over his face.

“good morning, hun.” he looks at you, placing his hands in your hips and analyzing your face. jaemin has the habit to stay silent while observing the tiniest details of your face, but special ones. those which makes you unique, which makes jaemin love you intensely.

you feel your cheeks burn, getting shy over jaemin’s gaze. “so…” you start. “i made you breakfast! since it’s your day off, i think you deserve being spoiled by me, don’t you think?” you grab his hand and lead him to the kitchen countertop, letting him see all the food you prepared.

“this is all mine?!” he asks, his eyes almost jumping out off his face.

“all yours, jaems!” a big smile grows in your face once again. you love the sight of jaemin’s soft side and you hope to see it forever until death tears you apart.

“thank you so much, love.” he smiles and hugs you tightly, filling the act with so much love. you both stay like this for a few seconds before jaemin pulls out of the hug, passing his hands through your hair softly.

jaemin caress your hair while paying so much attention to your beauty, his hands sliding down to your face just so he can appreciate what was his.

“you’re so beautiful.” jaemin whispers. you get flustered with his comment, your eyes breaking eye contact with his and looking at somewhere else. “look at me, hm?” he holds your chin, lifting your head up. “don’t look away when i’m talking to you.” he says softly.

he wraps your arms around his waist, his left hand holding your face and his right hand sliding down to hold your neck. “you know i’ll never get tired of complimenting you, right? you’re absolutely perfect in everything.” your eyes shine when the words come out of his mouth. “i love everything about you, y/n. i’m hardly in love with you, and i wanna feel like it forever.” he caress your cheek with his thumb.

“forever?” you ask, your voice is calm and low.

jaemin smiles and leans in to peck your lips, “forever.”

[dokyccis]

“damn it!” you exclaim.

02:51 shines in your little clock supported by your white desk. you’re studying for a very important test you have in your school, but your dear guitarist neighbor won’t let your mind focus in your studies.

you slide a black hoodie through your body, helping you with the cold atmosphere flying in your room and hiding the tank top you’re using.

you take your apartment’s key in your hands, walking furiously to your door, able to kill whoever get in your way in this moment.

“come on, park wonbin!” you say while approaching the wood-made door of wonbin’s apartment. you knock on it many times, the strident sound of the guitar annoying your ears.

wonbin opens his door after hearing a bunch of angry knocks on it, wondering who would bother him at almost 3 in the morning.

“oh, y/n?” wonbin seems to be surprised. “what are you doing he-”

“you dumbass! it’s almost three in the morning, can’t you shut this guitar up?!” you yell, and wonbin wides his eyes.

“girl, shush!” he sighs. “you’re gonna wake our neighbors up”

“oh, you already did this, mr. park!” you stump your feet in his carpet. “please, i’m trying to study for a very important test i have tomorrow. your guitar isn’t helping me.” you calmed down, lowering the volume of your voice.

wonbin seemed to be a little embarrassed because of the situation. he scratched his nape, looking for answers in his head. “sorry.” was the only thing he could say.

“you better be.” you checked him from head to toe before turning around and heading to your apartment’s door again.

wonbin saw you walk through the long corridor, wanting to swallow the words he prepared for a long time for when he meet you again.

“y/n!” his voice made you stop and turn around. “um…” he started. “do… do you wanna hangout after your test?” he finally let the words swim out of his mouth.

you, in the other hand, are confused by his sudden invitation. your heart says you should accept, but your mind says you should decline. luckly, you always follow what your mind says.

“sure.” you say, not realizing you just accepted his hangout invitation. you wide your eyes when you finally realize it, but you don’t correct your say.

“sure.” he reassures, a smiling growing in his face. “so… see you tomorrow?” he asks. you nod and hum in response.

“sorry again for the guitar. i’ll stop it.” he apologizes for the second time that night. you give him a polite smile and head to your apartment again, hearing his door being shut from behind your back.

wonbin can be a pain in the ass sometimes, but you can’t deny the fact that maybe you have a little interest in him. when you close your door, you sigh and feel a smile growing in your face, slapping your it when you notice.

“what is wrong with me?! ugh!” you squeeze your eyes shut, going crazy over your behavior.

maybe your annoying guitarist neighbor deserves a chance.

༉‧₊ a/n: dont look at me im deeply crazy over this man bro..

[dokyccis]

HOLY SHITTTTT?????? 1K NOTES ON MY JAEMIN DRABBLE!!! THANK U SM IM SO HAPPYYYY TYSMSM YALL REALLY ;( !!!! 💗💗

[dokyccis]

kiss you goodbye | c.hs

A pretty blue sky illuminating behind the large windows of the airport, hiding the sad Vernon that stood in front of you.

“I’m gonna miss you.” Says the boy. “I’m gonna miss us.” He looks at you with so much sadness painted in his face, reflecting in the way he talks.

“I’m gonna miss you and us too, Hansol.” You call him by his name, smiling to hide how you’re really feeling.

You applied to a university abroad, and now you’re about to take a flight straight to Canada. Seeing Hansol’s hazel eyes full of worry and sadness made your heart tighten — you don’t want to, but you need to go.

Study abroad has always been your childhood wish, when you were still a child you would always chat about how much you wanted to study in a big university.

Now, after years of still working on this wish, you’re finally putting an action to it. You can’t believe that this is reality, you can’t believe that your effort was worth the price. The happiness and proudness you’re holding right now is transbording, and the younger you is screaming inside of your body.

Whereas, Hansol doesn’t know how to feel about this situation. He’s sad his partner is departing to another country for 4 years, but he’s proud and happy at the same time.

“I’m so proud of you, you deserve everything you’re getting right now.” He gets closer to you, touching your face and grabbing your waist, sighing deeply.

“Thank you, Sol. I’m proud of you as well, I’ll always be.” You hug his waist, observing each detail of his face from up close.

Vernon is perfect in your eyes. Everything about him makes you go insane and fall more and deeply in love with him whenever you stop and analyze the way he’s perfectly-shaped. Like he was sculpted by Aphrodite.

“I love you so much.” He says, his hazel eyes sparkling more and more in each word that comes out from his mouth. “So much, so, so much.” He repeats.

You never saw this extreme sensible side of Vernon in years of relationship you have with him, it’s like a new dimension you just discovered.

“I love you too, my love.” You place one hand in his face, caressing it with so much passion and delicacy. “May destiny bring us together again in the future, right?” You laugh. “I’m so sorry, Sol. I’m really sorry.”

You decided to break up with Vernon days before your trip day. This break up would be healthy for the both of you; you will not need to suffer with the pain of having your partner in the other side of the world for 4 years.

Vernon agreed with you on breaking up, you can see the sadness shining in his eyes and tone, but he still agreed for your own good.

“It’s okay, y/n. It’s your dream since you were a little kid, I understand you.” He says. “May destiny bring us together in the future.” He smiles a little bit.

You bring your face closer to his and give him a gentle kiss, depositing all the love you had from head to toes. You really, really love Hansol.

He kisses you back and deepens the kiss, holding you tight in his arms like he was never letting you go, like it was the last day he’s seeing you in his whole life — because, maybe, it is.

You pull apart and you see tears form in the corner of Vernon’s eyes. You quickly cup his face, examining it to check if you were right.

And you were, Vernon is crying.

“You’re crying?” You widen your eyes. “No, baby! Don’t cry, please.” You ask, hugging him and letting him cry like a baby in your arms.

Vernon never cried that much in front of you, the day he’s letting you go is the day he most shows the sensitive side of him.

You can’t hear the sadness within Vernon’s loud cry without it hitting you too, and the tears start rolling down your cheeks when you least expect.

You two cry in each other’s arms, catching the attention of some people in the airport that seemed a little concerned but touched with the scene.

You and Vernon have a connection that you never had with anyone and neither did Vernon. A connection that any person could envy. You have no doubt you will cross ways in the future, because the wire that connects you and Vernon can never be cut.

You break the hug and look at Vernon for about some minutes before sighing deeply and taking your luggage in your arms and back. Vernon observes you organize everything with his heart breaking in millions of pieces, feeling an inexplicable pain eat him alive.

You look at him and smile, taking his hand in yours and kissing it. “Goodbye, Hansol.” You say.

“Goodbye, Y/N.” He says, feeling you let go of his hand little-by-little.

When you finally let go of his grip and walk to your gate, Vernon feels like he lost half of his soul.

A bunch of memories of you two play in Vernon’s mind like it was a movie, making him cry even more with your so dreamed departure.

He heads back to his car, almost not being able to walk properly out of sadness after losing the most important figure he had in the moment.

He starts the engineer and drives back to Seventeen’s dorm. Vernon enters the place with a terrible condition, making all the members head towards him to give him a group hug.

Vernon cries even more in his members arms, feeling safe and letting all his feelings out, he feels like he was home even though one part of him was gone.

You will never forget about Vernon, and Vernon will never forget about you. You two’s worlds are just one, even though now it’s painted blue.

Vernon really can’t wait to see the vivid colors invade his eyes once again, and he will only be able to see them if you come back home.

[dokyccis]

03:46 am

-

you hate thinking too much, you hate thinking about your future exams, you hate thinking at all.

tears were blurring your sight as you tried to calm down, feeling the anxiety fill you up. you were crying for long minutes, your hand laying on your mouth as you tried to not wake mark up with your own insecurities.

mark had a arm wrapped around you, holding you tight in his embrace as a try to make you feel comfortable and protected. you thought on waking mark up, but you definitely wouldn’t be happy knowing you woke him up just to burst about your emotions with him.

you bring your hand to his, grabbing it tightly in a way you could feel one percent of peace invade your body after long minutes of panic.

you hear something moving behind you, “no, no, no! please don’t!” you think, realizing that you woke mark up, the last thing you want to do this night.

“babe?” he asks, his voice sounding husky. you don’t answer. “y/n?” he asks again.

“yes?” you finally answer.

“what’s wrong, why are you awake this late?” he rubs circles on your back, trying to comfort you and make you feel better, no matter what you were feeling.

“it’s nothing, go back to sleep.” you say, turning your body to face his as you smile and close your eyes.

the room was dark, mark couldn’t see you were crying, making you relieved with the possibility of him not worrying too much about your condition.

but one thing about mark is: he can always sense what you need by just hearing your tone.

“you’re overthinking.” he affirms, making you open your eyes. “you don’t need that, y/n.” he starts.

“you know, i understand you perfectly, i know it’s hard to not think about something you’re genuinely anxious to, but this is hurting you.” he continues. “you don’t need to doubt yourself, you constantly do that and that will not help you on getting what you want.” mark places his hand in your waist, caressing it.

“you studied hard for it, right?” you nod. “then don’t think too much. i’m pretty sure you will make it, you always make it. you are crazily smart, y/n, don’t you remember everything you once told me? everything you once explained me?” he giggles. “damn, i was impressed with the way you can play with the subjects you know, the way you can play with the words that comes out from your mouth without getting it wrong.” you start to cry more and more, feeling touched by mark’s words.

“you’re brilliant. i want you to know that. i wanted you to see yourself like i do, i wanted you to see how richly smart you are. you’re the most amazing person i’ve ever seen and met in my life, the most sensible and caring person i’ve ever met.” his hands goes up to your hair, caressing it slowly.

“you’re amazing just the way you are. everything you do is amazing, everything you say is brilliant, your whole existence is a blessing, y/n.” you can’t say anything, just keep looking at mark as he distractedly says all that.

“i love you. you’ll always be the prettiest, kindest, sweetest, and, mainly, the smartest person standing in the top of my heart. you’re fucking amazing, y/n.” he leaves a sweet peck in your cheek.

“everything will be okay, you will be okay.” it’s the last thing he says before shutting his eyes close and going back to the dreamland.

you can’t stop the tears rolling down in your face. mark knew the exact right words to use when you were feeling down.

you can’t be more grateful to have a boyfriend like mark lee, so caring, lovely and positive like he is.

you love mark lee, and you will do it for eternity.

until death do you apart.

[dokyccis]

[my prom king] – gunwook

"hello there miss academic rival, or maybe not anymore," gunwook said, finally allowing himself to proudly grin after 3 years of fighting his ass off against you, in hopes to defeat you and earn the title of 'the best student in the entire school'.

these past 3 years you both volunteered, studied, taught, and everything else a person can probably do to earn the respect of your teachers and fellow students, and as a bonus you managed to be crowned as prom king and queen, kinda funny because you've practically hated eachother's guts.

"you're lookin' good tonight, lady," he said while wiping some of the glitter your little sister insisted was necessary and complimentary to your eyeshadow, not knowing that with a little bit of running and dancing it will smear all over your cheeks, but hey, who minds that when it's the school's hot guy.

"you look quite handsome yourself," you said politely, but internally you were freaking out. you never stood this close to him, his face was suddenly so pretty from this close it made you blush a bit.

"will you come for a dance with me?" gunwook asked shyly. he really expected for you to invite him first after he consulted your mutual friend, some funky (and when you think about it, not so reliable) guy named gyuvin, and gunwook, for some reason, listened to him when he said that you for sure would ask to dance with him.

"oh, I would love to dance."

"that's great," he said, and hurriedly pushed you to the dance floor.

after the song ended you tried to run away from him. you just suddenly fell hard for him and it felt too much. especially when he is mere centimetres away from your face and his eyes are staring into your's, but he didn't let you. he kept holding you tight.

"hey, is everything alright? why are you trying to run away?"

"it's just... I don't know."

"can I kiss you?"

"sure." you smiled widely, surprised he understood what actually went on.

and oh, man, that was a great kiss.

[dokyccis]

jaemin watches you with love overflowing his big eyes, enjoying the adorable scene of you playing with his kitties in his bed.

you’re recording a cute video of luke climbing up on you, finding cute the way jaemin’s cats got used to you so quickly. you giggle as you observe the hairy and tiny kitten lay peacefully on top of you, almost closing his little eyes out of sleepiness.

as you let luke relax on your chest, you pat luna’s head when she approaches you to jump in your legs, making you laugh with the sudden attitude. “you’re unpredictable, huh?” you say, smiling to luna.

you had sparkles in your eyes as you played with the little kitties present in the room, loving the way they were treating you like you were another version of jaemin.

“oh, lucy!” you quickly take luke out of your chest and luna out of your legs, standing up from the bed to approach lucy on the desktop. “don’t bite the computer, baby! that’s expensive, your dad would be mad at you.” you explain as you take her in your hands, holding her like a real baby.

jaemin gets up from the armchair standing in the corner of his room, going straight up to you and lucy. “you were trying to bite my computer, miss lucy?” he asks, burying his face in her white fur to give her a sweet kiss.

you hand jaemin the kitty in your arms, watching him baby it like it was the most precious thing in the earth, because for him, his cats are the most adorable things to ever exist. but, obviously, after you.

jaemin places lucy in his bed along with her siblings, lucy and luke. he turns around to you again and grabs your waist, looking at you with so much passion.

“what’s wrong?” you ask, surrounding his neck with your arms.

“you’re always so careful and loving with my kids.” you laugh with the way he refers to the kitties.

“of course i am, those are my boyfriend’s precious kids, how can’t i be careful and loving?” you smile, mesmerizing jaemin for, maybe, the millionth time in the day.

he leans in and leaves a sweet kiss in your lips, you don’t hesitate to kiss him back. your hands go straight to his nape as you deepen the kiss in pure passion.

both of you didn’t have any second intentions, you were just enjoying the moment, the vibe and each other’s warmth.

you pull away of jaemin’s lips, smiling before feeling a fluffy aspect tickle in your ankle. you look down to see luke looking up at you with big black eyes, and you melt with the adorable figure.

“oh, come on! luke, the girlfriend is mine, not yours!” jaemin looks down to scold the kitty, who was already trying to climb up your leg to play with you.

you absolutely love spending time with jaemin, specially when his kitties are there too.

[dokyccis]

busy | h.rj

★ | pairing: idol!renjun x fem!reader

★ | genre: angst

★ | warnings: yelling, renjun is kind of a pain in the ass, reader cries out of anger, mentions of anxiety, mark and haechan are cited

★ | synopsis: after 3 years of relationship, your boyfriend renjun starts acting weird around you. did you do something? is he hiding something from you?

-

you and renjun started dating 3 years ago. in the first 2 years of your relationship, renjun was the dream boyfriend. he’d wake you up carefully, he would drop everything if you were feeling bad, he was a very caring boyfriend.

even though renjun’s an idol, he would give you so much attention. sometimes, you felt like you were forcing renjun to something and overwhelming him with your attention neediness, but he’d make sure that everything was okay and he was doing this out of love.

you never doubted a word renjun said, you trusted your boyfriend more than you trusted yourself. all your friends love renjun for the way he treats you, for the way he looks at you with so much adoration in his eyes.

you love renjun for the way he touches you, for the way he kisses you and for everything he has ever done or said for you. huang renjun is everything you need and will ever need.

-

“renjun?” you called, holding your phone close to your ear to hear his response through the phone. “where are you?”

“hi” he simply answered. “i’m already going home, just give me 5 minutes.” he said, for the 5th time that night.

“you said that 5 times just this night, renjun.” you complained. “please, just don’t come home late.” you ended the call and shut your phone off, placing it by your side.

you sigh, tired of hearing the exact same phrase come out of renjun’s mouth. recently, renjun been acting weird every time you called him in the night, like he was hiding something from you.

both of you used to tell each other when something was wrong, you’d never hide something from renjun nor he would. you were curious about this situation, but you don’t want to imagine nothing more, avoiding getting anxious over this.

1 hour, 2 hours, 3 hours passed and renjun wasn’t home. you were about to call him again, when a key sound invaded your ears. you got up quickly, holding your thoughts back and waiting for renjun to open the door.

as you saw renjun’s figure enter in your shared apartment, you smiled brightly as he looked at you, you expected him to do the same and smile for you, but he just looked forward and went to the couch.

you were left speechless, wondering what happened to renjun that night. was he upset with you? did you do something? so many thoughts crossed your mind that moment.

you turn yourself to face your boyfriend, just to notice the way he’s giggling over his phone and typing something you couldn’t see. anguish rolled down your body, you felt sick seeing renjun get all giggly when you’re left behind, like you were nothing.

you approach the couch, sitting in it’s corner and looking at renjun, waiting for him to snap a gaze on you, but he didn’t move a muscle.

“renjun.” you called him, earning only a hum. “renjun.” you called again, earning renjun’s attention now.

“what?” he crossed his arms and looked at you coldly, making a knot tighten in your throat.

you sigh deeply, blinking away the tears that dared to swim in your eyes, finally looking at him confidently this time.

“what is happening to you these days?” you ask. “you give me billion of excuses just to come home late, you don’t give me attention anymore.” you say as he keeps his cold gaze over your face, shivering your whole body.

“nothing’s happening.” renjun simply said, getting up from the couch, ready to head to the bedroom.

“don’t leave me talking to myself!” you exclaim. “come on, renjun! you always give me a short answer to everything i say, i’m tired of it!” you get up from the couch in an impulse, feeling anguish and anger mix up in your chest.

renjun doesn’t says nothing, just listens the multiple words that come out from your mouth. you were expecting him to say something, but, again, he didn’t move a muscle.

“say something, renjun. give me an explanation.” you asked. “i’ve been humiliating myself to get your attention those days, but you don’t seem to care about me anymore.”

“i don’t care about you?” renjun finally speaks. “y/n, what the fuck are you talking about? you’re my girlfriend, of course i care about yo-” you cut him mid-sentence.

“but it doesn’t seems like you do!” you almost shout at renjun. “every time i try to talk to you, you just run off!” you burst.

renjun seemed calm over all this situation both of you were in, making you wonder how can he stay so neutral when the bound between you and him is falling apart in the most cruel way possible.

well, for you.

“it’s like you’re hiding something from me, renjun. when did we start hiding things from each other?” you take a step closer to him. “what’s a relationship without trust, renjun?”

“y/n, i’m not hiding anything from you!” said renjun, angrily. “stop creating things in your head! it’s not my obligation to give you attention 24/7, you’re acting like a child!”

“oh, i’m acting like a child, renjun? really?” you volume up your tone. “i’m acting like a child because i want a clear explanation about something that’s making me sad?!”

“i’m an artist y/n! how can you charge me attention when terribly busy with my work?!” he exclaimed.

“you are not busy, huang renjun!” you affirmed. “haechan’s been hanging out with his girlfriend these days and he has the same schedule as you, renjun. mark is hanging out with his friends and he has the same schedule as you. all your bandmates been free these months and you’re the only one who’s always busy!” you burst once again, anger rising up in your chest every time you draw a word out of your mouth.

“i have things to do in the company, y/n! do you think i’ll always be free for you?” he asks, using the same tone you’re doing.

“like what, renjun?” you ask this time, noticing renjun go blank of answers, looking taken back by your question. “go on, answer! you’re busy with what?” you ask once again, still waiting for an answer.

renjun looked for answers to give you, trying to choose the millions of excuses he could give you.

“look, y/n, you don’t understa-” you stop him mid-sentence for the second time.

“if you’re busy, then tell me, renjun.” you say firmly. “it’s better than give me lots of excuses just to come home at midnight and ignore my existence.” you feel tears burning in the corner of your eyes.

“i don’t ignore your existence, y/n! i have things to do, i have a life to deal with! you’re not the main thing i should give attention!” he shouts in your direction.

“sure, renjun, i’m not the main thing you should give attention.” you laugh it off. “but i’m not an object that you can use to your own neediness and just throw away when you get tired of it.” you state. “i’m your fucking girlfriend, huang renjun. you should tell me if you’re busy.”

“what is wrong with you? stop being so stubborn and selfish, y/n! i already told you why i come home late, but you don’t wanna hear me, you just prefer saying bullshit!”

“right, renjun, maybe i’m selfish, of course! but i’m fucking humiliating myself for a string of your attention, do you remember when you used to come home and ask about my day? ask how was i feeling.” you take a step forward again. “where is this renjun? what happened to him?”

“y/n, this was in our relationship’s start-”

“and does that changes something?” you ask. “do you even realize the way you look at me, renjun? the coldness present in your eyes whenever you look at me?” you feel the tears that were stuck in your eyes roll down your face.

“you never gave me an explanation, renjun. you spoke whatever you wanted to just to proof me wrong, but you never give me a clear explanation to your behaviour.”

“i don’t owe you an explanation! there’s nothing wrong, you’re just creating fake expectations in your mind and acting like it’s true!” renjun says, and you feel taken back by his response.

“you don’t owe me an explanation? really?” you feel the tears caress your face, dripping on the floor.

“why are you acting like this? i never did anythi-”

“BECAUSE I LOVE YOU!” you shout. “i love you renjun, and i don’t wanna feel like trash when i’m around you, i don’t wanna lose you. do you know how hard it is to handle all the cold responses and gazes you shot me?!” you keep your voice’s high volume.

renjun felt his body shaking as you shout, feeling guilty for all he has done in these past months. he never knew you felt like that when you were around him, he thought you wouldn’t care if he changed his behavior or if he doesn’t.

“y/n, calm down-” he tried to comfort.

“go back to the dorms.” you stated firmly.

“what?” renjun blinked his eyes twice. “what do you mean? i live here, y/n.”

“i said go back to the dorms.” you state again.

renjun couldn’t believe what he was hearing, you were expelling him from his own house?

“there’s no why, y/n! you’re just-” he cuts him mid-sentence this time. “nevermind.” he shruggs. “i’ll get going. have a good night.”

renjun picked his needs up and went straight to the apartment’s main door, opening it and getting out of the apartment, heading straight to his group’s dorms.

as the door closes, you feel like falling on the floor. your tears fall in your face nonstop, wetting your face and dripping on your clothes.

you never thought you’d fight with renjun like you did today, and all you can do is cry, cry and cry. your love life was perfect until today, the day you fought with renjun the way you never did.

you felt empty, and so did renjun. you were used to be alone in that apartment, but not when you know you told renjun to get out, not when you’re the reason why you’re feeling empty and abandoned.

in all these 3 years of relationship, renjun was a very loving boyfriend, you were confused about his sudden behavior towards you, about the way he treats you after this long time.

you learned that love isn’t just pretty flowers, it can fade from a day to the other. you don’t know if that’s the case between you and renjun, but you’re pretty sure something’s wrong with him, but he doesn’t wants to tell you out of fear of your reaction.

and all that happened, because he was supposedly busy.

[dokyccis]

texts with bf!mark

★ | pairing: bf!mark x fem!reader

★ | genre: smau

★ | warnings: my kitsch humor, reader tells mark to shut up lolz, use of “bro” and “dude” cuz that’s mark lee aesthetic, there’s use of the word “bitch” in the last screenshot

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★ | a/n: HEEEEEY how yall doing? ignore my shitty humor pls thanks 🥰❤️ anyways, tysm for reading!! <3