dontevenpmodarlin

[dontevenpmodarlin]

[dontevenpmodarlin]

Uhm. Anyone have any ideas on any symbolism with that donkey mask could be. There’s definitely something there. Also HUH. JUST HUH. IS BERNICE LIKE- I DONT SAY BUT IM GETTING LIKE ALABAMA VIBES HERE. I ALSO THOUGHT THAT WAS THEIR DAD BUT I GUESS NOT😭

Also funny little parallel here I think definitely means something

ALSO ALSO. HER DRESS IS SO PRETTY AAAA HOLD ME BACK 😭

[dontevenpmodarlin]

Hi so since all of the Willtresor- or candle if you may- episodes are out there for the free readers, I’d like to talk about my favorite yet aspect of their relationship, which makes me kick my feet so hard that Duke would’ve been out of the wall quicker with the intense force of my bare dawgs than if Lenore had a bulldozer spectre or if Pluto came in swinging on a wrecking ball.

And the muse behind my feets adhd is the aspect of honesty that Candle has for one another.

And now you guys may be like “Whatttttt? But OP, this is toxic yaoi, Monty’s manipulating Will.”

But shush my huzz, let daddy explain.

Montresor in many occasions is shown to plainly manipulate Will the same ways he does with Ada.

And now one may think that, yes, not holding Will accountable for his actions is bad, because no matter what Montresor says, he isn’t really forcing Will to do anything at the end of the day. That’s true.

He sure as hell emotionally manipulates him, like in the cemetery scene where he tells him “Well!? What’ll it be, pal? Hightail it like a wimp, or die standing up?”

It hardly matters if Montresor believes in that statement or not, or in which cases he thinks it applies and so on. He knows what he’s doing.

But at the end of the day he is never forcing Will do pick what Will picks to do. The choice is always Wills, so yes, trying to take the fault from Will would be counterproductive for him because regret is the only way to atonement or forgiveness or whatever your aim is, and rationalizing why his actions are okay is denying him what he actually deserves, which is the honest consequences- emotional or physical.

But rationalizing and trying to understand are like two diff things that get mixed up I fear ig?

Now yes, of course we agree on the fact that Will’s perception of the world and relationship with himself is what traps him in this relationship and situation and forces him to take choices that may finally lead him to define him as a person- which is after-all what bro is out here looking for even before he dropped dead.

He wants to matter, and the issue with Montresor aligning with what Will understands as mattering and being important is the thing that derails him. But that’s still on him, and I’m not saying that he should blame himself for understanding the world wrong, because both he and Monty are basing their understanding the same way we all are in many cases, which is sadly with the flawed conclusions we got from bad experiences.

Because the experiences themselves were bad in that matter- or Well, they surly were with Monty, - and the understanding that he has created on them was purely self defending I think? Which doesn’t mean that he isn’t selfish or bad, because he literally is, it just doesn’t erase the other stuff.

But since they both are basing their actions on faulty understanding of their experiences in the world, it is given that their actions will be flawed.

So Will choosing Monty’s ways and morals over what he clearly feels is and isn’t right (as we can see on his facial expressions and even in words) makes sense for him, but yuh it doesn’t excuse him.

He is being manipulated, and the action itself is not good- people like to say that “There’s no good or bad, there’s just an experience.” Or “There’s no bad decisions, there’s just lessons.” Which are appealing but gravely wrong at the end of the day.

Thinking of stuff to just be lessons is bad because it takes you out of the state of regret, which disallows you to register the mistake etc and if you think that bad decisions doesn’t exist then you can’t even feel remorseful because you rationalize your way out of the natural feelings of making a mistake and don’t allow yourself to get the forgiveness for it or just make it as right as you can.

(Which isn’t to say to like drown in guilt, that’s an extreme the same way like thinking everything is neutral)

So, like, yes! Their actions are wrong asf! Annabel’s and Lenore’s and Ada’s are as-well!

I think it’s just plainly obvious who is more gone in terms of being a bad person. Because their actions do define them at the end of the day. So we could fx talk about Ada’s clear regrets in situations, and how that is a good sign and thing for her, but at the end of the day she and Will maybe-unknowingly are using Monty too.

They’re all using one another in different ways, and it’s worse to us to see Ada and Will be used because they’re not that far gone with fx feeling guilty in the Duke wall scene, whereas Montresor is living his life and Annabel tries to figure out if this late night escapades will affect the curves of her curls.

Either way what I’m leading up to with allat is that the fact that Montresor is manipulating and using Will is not defying that he is also honest with him. And I mean in an ‘abnormal’ for him way.

(And I’ll also talk about his honesty with Ada and Annabel, and why it differs from the one he has with Will.)

Let’s start with the basic situation where Will is held on a gunpoint by a freshly out of a one? two? years long situation-ship lesbian, and Montresor offers him advice on personal hygiene & God on a random morning before breakfast.

Now Bro realized that LeNo was there and such, but he didn’t have to stop and mention his personal opinions to Will. And yes, he likes to boast abt his world views as we’ve seen in the graveyard scene with Eula being the victim of Yee Yappatron Haw, but this situation differs a bit?

Let’s quickly go over it.

Your eyes do not deceive you, my fellow sigma, Montresor stops and turns around, just to throw Will one of his ‘golden’ quotes that he’d put on MySpace if he could.

But why is it that he decides to stop and do that? Maybe it is simply that he feels so strongly about church and religion, but then he wouldn’t do this if he did, right?

He at first here isn’t mansplaining Will why he shouldn’t do whatever he does, so maybe I’m delusional for thinking that, but the head flick seems to be one of sort of affection, and then him stopping to tell Will the thing is coming out as a double meaning from him trying to lowkey calm Will down or encourage and challange him?

I’ve alr explained what it may say about Monty’s beliefs what he’s saying to Will there in an earlier post so we won’t go over that here. But that last part of “We’ll see, partner.” Might just be him planning out loud in secret to himself as in “Ye you think idk shit abt that lesbian in ur room so you don’t think ill save you, and what will you do with my advice then?”

But it’s an honest advice at the end of the day? If it’s good, well, in this situation for Will growing a backbone is a fair idea and interpretation overall and such, and from Monty’s perspective it’s a honest advice too. It’s something that he has based a lot of his decisions on, I believe.

So why tf would he tell Will that? If he either way was coming to save him? he does not need to tell him that.

So if he’s sharing something he deeply believes in with Will, is this to motivate Will into being what Monty would think of as “better” ?

Why would bro need to do allat if he just needs Will to manipulate him around. That may be the thought process and his goal, but it doesn’t mean that this action was purely done out of nowhere or just to flex Monty’s beliefs on us, I think.

And then Will promising Monty to do his best, and Monty mocking him with “That’s your best!?” & “Shit, Will. Some backbone” may theorize that he said allat because he knew that Will wouldn’t actually make it and understand what he said, and so to just make fun of him.

But that’s lowkey like boring? I think that if we see this as, yes, maybe Montresor did hardly expect Will to ‘succeed’ (in his understanding) in this situation, but still offered him an advice for some reason, would make this much more interesting about his character.

I mean we saw him fighting off all those dogs.

Buuuuut reversing without that little reverse mirror we have in cars swiftly back to the ‘honesty’ I mentioned him having with Annabel and Ada, I appear not to be crashing. Which thanks Holy Samantha, because I have no insurance on my opinions.

Nah ok but the honesty he is giving Ada is the kind that is mixed with lies leading to his advantage.

I talked abt this in the earlier post where I analyzed him, where I believed that he is using this method of lying and mixing it with truth the way his mother did.

So for the instance, when Ada has her valid crash out caused by Prospero’s valid crash out, he finds her and tells her that she is pretty. Now I doubt that he lied abt it bcus he called her sugar way at the beginning and I believe that the authors of the comic mentioned that their relationship- or rather his interest in her was supposed to be foreshadowed (tho that’s sadly hard to see when he tells her and her ginger gf to bark) but I believe it’s there nevertheless.

So he used a truth of him thinking she’s pretty, and maybe his note of Prospero being lucky to be alive was true indeed, but his action of telling her that comes out of a place of getting her under control. So he may be using honesty here but only for his gain.

With Annabel Lee he’s forced into it. Since bleeding out on the stairs, as hot as it may be, is hardly a worthy death, and bro alr got hit by a train so he now has some minimal standards to uphold.

But with Will and their dogs, he has nothing to gain from it. Sure, someone could object and remind of the fact that now that Montresor may highly be of belief that Ada is dead, or is on her way to be dead, he can’t possibly put himself at a disadvantage of loosing another one of his loyal meowlings, and it would be a fair thing if his own words wouldn’t go against that idea.

Bro fucked up if he wanted to uphold that illusion- but before we get to that quickly I want to include the other moment of random honesty? Which is more muddled than the staircase one but still interesting.

Now he may usually not bother, but he does plainly tell Will that he’s a bootlicker in the classroom ProAda fake relationship, strangers to strangers 1 day breakup scene, but there he does it in a haha way. Here he is angry at Eulalie and others for the lack of the attention on him, and then his pain as he hits himself, and it goes out on Will because he offers him help.

And ig in Monty’s understanding needing help means you’re weak, so Will offering it is offending.

Then he gets mad at Will for being scared and flinching, and that’s just imo the whole thing abt hating Will’s weakness because he sees the younger version himself in him.

Will reassures him that he ofc isn’t and that they’re besties, toe holding and shoplifting at the same time for ever typa shit, and that causes Monty to say the whole thing.

So, Will says “We’re best friends”

And Montresor’s bare angry understanding and logic leads him to tell Will that if that’s true then he needs to do him a favor, and stop licking his boots.

Because honestly, in Monty’s eyes how could he ever have a bff that is a bootlicker? I mean maybe he doesn’t even believe in bffs 👯 but overall I think he’s saying here, oh if you believe that, then here’s what I believe for it to be true.

Will doesn’t get the memo and apologizes and Montresor keeps being mean bcus he thinks he’s in the right and gotta take his anger on smth aswell.

Eula has her whole ‘Stop bullying” middle school talk, because her child labor slavery in life had a safe space rule to speak up about one’s feelings since they required total honesty in order to summon ghosts and let them take over the poor and vulnerable young and moldable children souls, so Eula could chitchat with the dead.

So ig she bringing her working environment regulations with her to after death fits.

Either way her too womanly woman way of womaning isn’t appealing to Will because he’s gay and also because even if it may sound true and reasonable and just be the truth, it doesn’t fit into the other stuff that he believes or want to believe to be truth.

Monty loves the attention so he’s living his dead after life, and tells Will that he got himself an admirer. Now idk tf he is thinking, if he fr thinks that someone standing up for someone else means they must like the other person in some way or if he plainly is thinking her stupid and just uses her words to make fun of the situation.

Either way he wraps her words into bs

I mean the expression on his face there really tells us everything lowkey. Bro really tryna appear as a helpful friend but then he hardly respects or thinks of Will as a friend there, because he just told him that to be bffs 👯 you gotta stop licking my boots, kittah. (No matter if he wants that or not) and he can’t rly take Will srsly when Will is like this.

Now idk tf to say abt his flashback other than Johnny and Sally using him as their third wheel that would give them shit they wanted. How does this reflect on his relationship with Monty? I mean yeah he has been tricked and used since when alive.

And then we got him acting for the approval of Montresor, saying stuff that he thinks Monty will like.

Does Johnny and Sally remind him of Monty or Eula’s offer of friendship. Does he mean that she doesn’t understand because he doesn’t remember how his ‘friends’ were and Monty remind him of them, or because Monty is the opposite of them? Ngl no idea either way not the point mb.

Either way he gets impaled part 2.

Which leads to their uwu yaoi meow moment that sm ppl hated on😔

Monty runs, we think of it as nothing new, Will doesn’t either, but then Monty returns and it’s shock etc.

Now he has no reason to tell Will that he did good. Like even if he lied here, then it’s not much about that. He doesn’t think that Will is beyond saving either for him to try to be nice to him and lie, which idk it would be ooc I think either way, and so he drags them both away and shields Will with his body.

Now the whole dog this is I think about him seeing his younger self and Will in the dog. It doesn’t know better may be him being sympathetic because he didn’t know better either as a child and got punished still, or for whatever reason, and then he says that he doesn’t care about nuthin or no one bcus that’s what he believes in.

But by an instinct or idk tf it’s called, moving without thinking, he kills the guy that tries to shoot the dog.

It’s clearly a choice made without thinking but just by feeling. Why he has that as a reflex? Probably protective thing, not letting someone hurt that dog because of what such a creature symbolizes to him, the same with Will.

And then he also says how stupid it is to become an outlaw this way, and we see how much this costs him, but he still doesn’t blame the dog, and takes it with him. Calls it worthless etc.

And cmon, why tf would we get a flashback of him doing that exact thing if it wasn’t connected to what’s happening rn.

Will mentions how he just contradicts himself but Montresor tells him to stfu because he doesn’t want to explain himself bcus well, fucking scissor me timbers, he wouldn’t be able to.

Then we have the iconic convo where Will confronts him and Monty basically admits that he doesn’t know why he does what he does (the honesty here?) but states that he’d be lost without him.

Now ok where here is him like trying to in-debt Will? Will tries to thank him, but Monty denies even the situation to be abt him doing anything for Will, and if he does this, he can’t rly bring it up later now, can he?

And Monty tells him too, that maybe it all wasn’t really about Will, and yeah this kinda is abt Monty. It’s about how he feels about stuff and why he makes those choices- as he admits himself that he doesn’t even understand.

He is disgusted? Or dislikes very much the idea of Will, “guess it’s just that you’re so damn pathetic. Cant seem to take care of yerself, and no one else cares to.”

He seems irritated by the thought of that in the panel

& “You’d be lost without me.”

Has a face expression of disapproval too.

The whole thing is that he really doesn’t need to share allat? He is just being honest but he isn’t getting anything of this, of saving Will rn, and yes, he is probably doing it because of the same reason that he saved that dog and it all connects to where the reflex itself came from, but then this means that he isn’t doing this rn to manipulate Will (he could surly use it later to do so, tho I doubt bcuz this feels like HIS weakness, not Wills, that he stays to save him)

So still, no matter if the reason he is cool here is coming from the fact that he can empathize because he possibly went through the same, it’s the fact that this places him in a spot where his and Wills relationship shifts kinda.

This is how he views Will. He views him as all those bad things, and thinks he decided to believe are bad, but then he can’t leave him because it reminds him of other stuff.

Bro is stuck lol.

Also as Lenore said he truly may be the only person in the whole academy to truly care abt him.

Then when Will talks abt the tombstone he also answers truthfully what he thinks.

I think that this whole convo will shift some core thing abt them, or unravel new sides of it. Because Will is being truthful because he is dying, Montresor is being honest because idk shock or just because he thinks Will so weak that he hardly does need to lie to him because he can’t do shit to him and also does not want Will to die here.

And he gets actually worries about Will as well, and when Will dies he allows himself to mourn him for a short while.

Will is lying to Monty with stuff like “I’m not afraid of you ofc” because he is so in no touch with his feelings and is desperate to believe in the idea he has of them and tries to make Monty happy.

Monty manipulates him around and doesn’t respect him and can’t because Will is also making it impossible to respect him in some ways by how he is disrespecting himself 24/7.

Now idk how this whole thing will exactly change them, but the fact that they keep having those short moments where they’re honest about how they feel or think about stuff- even if the way they think is flawed- is what may just make them super interesting!

So yeah lol ig that’s the thing I wanted to yap abt. #Candle for life. Also if anyone doesn’t agree and have some cool opinions and other povs pls tell me!

Also mb for the spelling I wrote this at four am

[dontevenpmodarlin]

Montresor analysis post.

I am going to talk a lot about episode 87 and then a bit about other episodes.

I watched a guy talk funny on YouTube and here is it roughly translated;

“Ego produces most of our thoughts. We think that when we interact with the world, talk to people, that those things generate thoughts inside us. But no. What enters us are raw materials, materials from which the ego composes thoughts. But what thoughts it creates depends on what you have experienced, what traumas you have, how you were raised. What you have understood to what extent and how certain things, what conclusions you have drawn based on a certain understanding you had. What decisions based on these conclusions you have started to make and what patterns have been created based on making certain decisions. What you have seen, smelled, experienced.”

So the stuff that are being said here are very impressive to me and I adore it.

And it reminded me of Montresor.

Montresor is raised in a very religious community. In it, for reasons unknown to us yet, he is seen from birth as a sinner.

“You’ve had the devil inside you since the day you were born” - Monty’s mom.

If it’s by his mother, or by the whole community, we don’t know. We know that at the end he seems to be the scapegoat of them all, (if the robed figures do indeed symbolize his old community, idk they may symbolize just other people over all.) but let’s assume that ig? Going by that thinking Montresor is raised in a place where everyone blames him for stuff.

Let’s quickly go over the facts we get from the flashback:

We’re in a church.

There’s dirties cloaked figures, faceless, that are wearing white robes. The robes themselves are dirtied, suggesting that those people are themselves not ‘clean’ ‘pure’ or free of ‘sin’

Montresor asks them who they are and what do they want.

A figure reaches out from under the cloak- let’s also point out that everyone in this flashback is cloaked. As if the robe itself is a protection from the dirt? Perchance? (You can’t just say perchance☝️🤓)

The robes can suggest that they’re hiding themselves under the pretense of something pure/righteous and do not let the dirt stain them.

They may hide who they really are or their intentions.

The person who touches him on the chest -Duke and Annabel railing scene style- stays quiet for a moment “…” before saying that “You’re wicked.”

And THAT burns. That handprint burns.

The cloaked figures hand itself turns black, and the DIRT from the cloaked figures robe, atoms dissolves itself and burns Montresor leaving a mark.

Here’s the visual for the first time it happens and later on we get a whole panel of how the line infront of him is dirtied and the whole line after passing by him is cleansed.

Okay so we pretty clearly get the meaning of this, but let’s go over this panel by panel.

Montresor bends over holding onto his chest and making the ouch-sounds, and bro doesn’t get a break because the next hand is already reaching out for him, as the now cleaned ‘Mr.Yee Wicked’ goes away.

Montresors notices and says ‘WH- hold on’

But the next figure already is saying “You are selfish.”

And it’s dirt leaves its robe, creating a burn on Montresor’s back.

The figures keep coming with comments like “Gluttonous.” “Stupid.” “Depraved.” to which all Montresor objects, getting more and more agitated.

As I said, the whole line infront of him is dirtied, waiting for their turn to get rid of their dirt-sins-wrong doings, by blaming it on him, or projecting or whatever.

I’ve wanted to write down list over where which blame is placed but it doesn’t show past these three’s, and I don’t want to assume too that it was meant symbolically, but it would’ve been cool if it was.

Heart? - Wicked.

Upper back - Selfish.

Left Shoulder - Depraved? Or Wretched?

Either way the Wretched comment is where he breaks with a “Please.”

Now for everyone that is as English as me, id like to just quickly summarize that the word Wretched means being in a miserable, unfortunate, or deserving of pity state.

(If I’m wrong, do so correct me.)

Either way it suggest in religious context being removed from the God. Which well, is the source of life and everything overall.

Also let’s quickly say that the handprints leaving burns means them having a lasting effect on Montresor. They burn him. The accusations and judgments, handprints symbolizing different vices, condemning him, have long lasting effects on him.

Montresor is in the next panel curled up nearly, he hugs himself with his long hair covering his face, (in shame?) and his right eye being visible in emotion of like I’d say conflict? He is hurt by so many people here, he asks them to “Just leave me be.” I think that panel describes a lot of his childhood. He doesn’t understand what’s happening or why they’re doing this to him.

Him hugging himself with his hands holding his shoulders tightly amidst the burning handprints dooo create a visual. Are his hands atp holding him together or are they part of the blame, but now self inflicted? Does he believe all of that? Maybe he knows it’s not real but still it does force the thoughts and bad beliefs.

He must feel it to be wrong, OR he believes it, but he must’ve noticed as he grew up that others weren’t holier than him.

When a hand reaches to his forehead to say “You are worthless.” He SNAPS.

He does NOT let that touch him. He fights against it all then, with

“So what if I am.” He replies looking up. (Idk if the way the sentence is multiplied and lowered on opacity suggests it being said before, or a ringing effect.)

It continues with:

“Does it make you feel holy?!” “Like yer better than me!?” “Like y’all ain’t sinners yerselves?!”

Which hi? Okay so he may accept all those things, and believe them deep inside? Negative stuff being repeated to us as we grow up DO fuck up our brain, and worm inside it. They create beliefs because even IF we are so lucky to understand on an intellectual level that something may not be completely true, the wound itself was created on a deep emotional level.

If you’re told as a child that you’re an pathetic little crusty Cheeto thief-goblin then that may trigger an insane emotional reaction. You trust adults, if the ones that are your guardians say shit, you believe them ofc. They are keeping you alive, you need their love and approval to survive and grow.

So words like pathetic, Cheeto, and thief fx can leave marks on us, make us feel ashamed so insane degrees. And fear and shame are two main sources of a lot of feelings, that may be masking them.

So even understanding that you’re not a Cheeto might’ve left such an emotional scar on you that until you feel those feelings that were stopped back then and turned into a trauma, you won’t be left free of it and will be haunted. And for the emotions to flow, you also need a new logical understanding of what happened and why you’re not a Cheeto or why being a Cheeto is not wrong. You need to see on both levels that it’s a misunderstanding or not a wrong doing.

Anyway that Worthless comment ENRAGES Montresor. All the other comments lead him to feel anger, shame? Sadness? But that one triggers him more that the T-word (🚂)

“Worthless, y’say?” “Worthless!?” Monty screams looking around, he is circled by the purified freaks, “YOU.” “NEED.” “ME.”

Which fuck yeah, okay so he understands that everyone around him is a ‘sinner’ as well, and that they’re using him as a scapegoat to feel better about themselves. This is and understandable source of insane anger.

Now the fuck ass bitch of the mf year comes in, aka his Mother who I’ll call Samantha because I don’t want to type Monty’s mom 24/7.

Samantha- I’m kidding, his mother shushes him, calms him down as she reaches for him, and holds him- or rather has him in her clutches! As she doesn’t HUG him ladies and gentlemen, she holds her hands clasped around him.

Let’s add to this that his mother’s robe is colored RED. And her right hand has a golden cross ring.

Which HI OKAY. Okay. Funny thing, this might be a reach BUT, overall wearing a cross necklace is supposed to mean bearing your own cross, as in bearing your own hardships and suffering and pain etc, not rejecting it.

In literature such as Dostoyevsky the cross necklace is used often in ways as to show one taking the consequences of their actions and bearing them. Or as in exchanging them to show brotherhood.

Either way, I may be looking too much into stuff yk? But she’s wearing it on her middle finger which lol, but she’s wearing it on her hand, not around her neck, and she puts her hands around in a pseudo hug which is actually a cage next to the other burns on his body.

Is it meant to symbolize her trapping him by using religion? Or Samantha putting her own wrongs and blames on him as well? Her burdens? We’ll get back to that later.

Monty is huffing and puffing bcus he just had a rage attack, and his mother asks him “Are you picking fights again, my treasure?”

I’m shitting myself full live ultra HD because this implies that him trying to fight for himself and rejecting himself being worthless is declined.

He is not allowed to do so.

Why doesn’t his mother allow it? Because feelings as shame and guilt can be used to trap people. That’s what narcissists does usually taking facts mixing up words and phrases to make the other person seem guilty and in blame.

Holy Samantha is calling this ‘picking a fight.’ And the ‘again’ suggest that she’s been bending perceptions to her like and presenting the reality in her fancy.

And her fancy is keeping control over Montresor.

“My treasure.”

So this is a whole thing, which I suspect most of us already know of but let’s go over it for the sake of clarity.

His mother calling him ‘Montresor’ which can be directly translates to ‘My treasure’, and now it’s cute when it’s in the style of ‘My pumpkin’ pie’ but it’s rather giving ‘MY PRECIOUS.’ As in Gollum.

He belongs to HER. His autonomy is hers. He is not to misbehave- but actually he IS to misbehave, because that’s what keeps him trapped! If he sins, he needs HER to atone. How else is he to be forgiven? (Samantha is flashing us her Colgate smile my loves, she is NOT against this situation.)

His mother traps him in a cycle where he will always misbehave, and everything he does will be shown in that light, he’s either hopeless or selfish, and she DOES want him in that cycle, for him to endlessly try to not misbehave and always fail, and always have to depend on her for atoning for failing.

The next scenes will explain this better,

Montresor looks down at the arms wrapped around him and says “Mother.” In shock on his face. But not ‘Mother?’ But as in a statement.

Also back up, she is wearing a red robe. It’s not stained. She does not feel at fault or blame. And maybe it’s because her son is her main outlet. The white can symbolize righteousness, or devotion. Red may symbolize power or sin? Probably power, since she’s in power of him.

Anyhoo, she says

“Holler all you want. They’ll never hear you.”

Aka you’re helpless, no matter what to do they will never hear you = understand you = accept what you say. This can be a shaping belief to have, it’s no use to defend yourself because the crowd is deaf.

This is critically damaging because it’s partly truth in this situation. The cloaked figures won’t listen to what he has to say, he’s the worst of them all, all he says is bound to be bad.

This also dismisses the idea of trying for change or reaching for justice by peaceful means. They won’t listen anyways. You have to act in other ways.

“How don’t you understand yet?”

She’s insinuating he’s behind on something and it’s he who doesn’t understand, it’s all an illusion in his head. She’s planting doubt atp in his head too. Like darling? Why tf are you so behind, throwing a fit in a public server. Be ashamed- if you want ig.

“You are not one of us.”

Isollllation. Isolation is DEATHLY. Detaching him from all of them again would force him to think that she is like nearly a god for being there for him or loving him.

Making him dependent on her. He is to feel worse by overall, and it all comes at the end of the day of if she’ll be pitiful enough- or god forbid ah if she is forced to love him because he’s her child and it’s not even her choice to pity him! It’s forced! - and will grant him ‘acceptance’ or a form of it.

She won’t leave him. And her abandoning him should scare him. (Maybe this is a reach, I’d like to say that I’m theorizing real hard rn) but Samantha not wanting Montresor to leave her could indeed be swapped around into a way in which he feels her fear instead, so she gains more control. Typical narcissist behavior ig.

I feel ashamed? Nahhh, it’s all you G. I am angry? No it’s YOU who is raising your voice at ME. I’m the poor victim. LMAO IG?

I don’t want to be left alone? (Again?) (or to bear all the shame alone?)

Well, let’s switch it around and make YOU scared of me leaving so that I’ll be ensured you won’t leave me.

Ok next is just Monty looking at the big ass cross on the wall hit up by light and shit, as his mother holds him and keeps talking.

Btw id like to point out the effect of the windows. They have those diamond bars patterns. They’re ALL over Samantha’s smexy red H&M robe. They’re like prison bars, and it can ofc suggest her trapping him, or them both being trapped. I mean she herself is trapped in her own emotions and who she is, and she’s doing it to him too bcus that’s what she is doing to herself, unconsciously or not. The patters seem to do that to us.

“We walk with the lord, always.”

“Never question his plans.”

The statement of him not being one of them and then these being said suggest that he doesn’t walk with the lord and that he questions his plans- by questioning stuff? By questioning how he is treated? Very extreme show of how religion can be corrupted and bent for one’s own use. You could take overall a lot of wisdoms or Facebook quotes and do tf u want with them, and Montresor’s mother is quite a person.

“And He smiles upon us for our devotion.”

“But when He tests you, you get angry. You think you know better.”

Well what a way to spin and tamper with his emotions. His anger is not rightful. What he feels is wrong. People around him judging or abusing him is right or a test or whatever, and if Monty was devoted he wouldn’t feel like this.

Which is insane for as many reasons as you can think of. Anger to unjust is the right emotion, lmao it’s even mentioned in Bible, so she’s bending the words to her will.

Then, she reaches out for his hair in this very motherly manner of tucking it behind his ear, saying “You are faithless, my son.” “You have earned your misery.”

Okay so also to say, her tucking his hair behind his ear like this is crazy brainwashing. The physical touch and motion shows love and affection. While the words she speaks are of the opposite. We can see her mouth through most panels and she is show smiling, she is calm, she is content saying all of this.

Also the fact that she uh like takes the hair away for his ear to be out in the clear like dawgs on the beach, maybe in a way so he listens.

Montresor objects again.

“I’m not. I didn’t.”

Woah gender reveal ahh colors. He objects to being faithless, which may mean that he believes in god but thinks himself too wicked, and that’s why God does nothing for him? I’m unsure, as in episode 81 we get this golden stuff:

“Say, love Will? D’you wanna know a secret?”

“God’s never saved anybody. ‘Specially not the faithful.”

We could assume he means himself. I at first thought he meant himself when he was a believer but then if he went being non believer he wouldn’t say that God doesn’t save ppl because God wouldn’t exist I guess. So God chills but he’s mean in Monty’s opinion?

“Even in the good book, they always end up worse off. At the end of the day, all you can rely on is yourself. So maybe try growin’ a backbone, yeah?”

Okay so crazy good, because we can see where his belief of only relying on yourself comes from. It’s from the fact that he probably had to save himself from the situation he was in when he was younger. No magic hocus pocus apparated him out of the church, no Voldemort giving him a gun in the forest. He was all on his own, and he probably strongly believes he always will be.

Also in Wills gray ass shattered like pieces of glass flashbacks (William you’re so incredibly talented in being mentally unwell I feel better abt myself) we can see Monty’s comments to Will.

“Stop them you useless piece a shit!”

“Well? What’ll it be pal? Hightail it like a wimp, or die standing up?”

“Yer a damned fool, Will.”

“What a bootlicker” - “s’pose you’d know.”

“Hell, Will! S’the matter with you!?”

“I love you so much we should move out and live on a farm and see who kills who first.”

And by all those comments we get yet another glimpse into Montresor’s world.

William in Monty’s eyes is someone weak and helpless. Who has read FP ifykyk, I would love to write abt that, it’s another important part to Montresor’s character but idk if I should do so here, as idk how tf to spoiler anything.

Okay, and what is his reaction to weakness or helplessness? It’s a reaction of protection!

As in, rejecting portraying weakness or feeling helplessness or any act of it, and defying it, is a form of saving himself from the pain that those things brought him, as he associated being that with being trapped, used, manipulated. He can’t afford himself to have such weak spots, he has to be the opposite.

There’s a delicious other side to this but ig if I’ll get bored in a month or so I’ll write abt the current fp.

Next panel after Montresor objecting is his Mother smiling and telling him “The prove it.”

“Pray.”

And she pushes him down to kneel, looming over him. Also to mention, her brighter blonde hair is insane because he has dirty blonde hair. Hi?

His hands shake as she forms them into the praying hands, and he tells her “B-But I can’t.”

“And why not?”

“I’ve forgotten the words. Could you remind me how it starts? I need your help, Mother.”

(Also is she leading the church or what? Why is she ‘Mother’ and not ‘mother.’ So she has a superior lore in the church as a nun or smth idk?)

Montresor here is ready to pray and ask for forgiveness, but he doesn’t know the words any longer, and he is vulnerable in asking for help, he literally says out loud the ‘I need your help, Mother.” Which is crazy work for a guy like him. Sadly it’s the wrong person to ask for such, but it’s the only person perhaps he believes he can ask for that. She didn’t seem to leave him even if he’s born as this massive sinner from the beginning.

Then she lifts his chin up and tells him that

“I know.” “But there’s no helping you, my treasure.”

And her face seems ‘solemn’ now. As if she’s telling him the sad truth. This is her just further trapping him up in the cycle of being in control of him. There’s no helping him really, but he should be always asking for it. It’s using the stuff from Bible about people being born in sin and never being able to really get rid of it, but yet still are encouraged to ask for it.

As well, without the overall corruption it just means to accept one’s flaws and how stuff like generational trauma already passes upon us, and that such complicated stuff are impossible to fully fix. Since under one illusion lies another and so on, and you’d really need to be a God to fully just heal and be pure of all the ‘sin’ but asking for forgiveness even if you do stuff wrong bcus u don’t have control over every mean thing you do, I’d just admitting that you aren’t strong enough but want to change, and you keep that intention.

You don’t really have to believe in God or be religious to see that intentions are like really powerful stuff too, and they make our brain orient us on the goals we set for ourselves, and if the intention is indeed, Im sorry for doing this thing that I know is not good, and id like to ask for help and change, - Is literally gonna lead u good places either way.

Samantha is taking that away from Montresor. The belief that he can change, can ask for help, and then adds at the end that he is her treasure.

He is stuck with her. Who else will love him than her in this pov she’s forcing onto him? She takes away the possibility of being free by that, locking him in the delusional beliefs she keeps feeding him.

He has worth only when he’s with her. He snaps at being judged to be worthless, and his mother is the only one around to see him in any worth.

He’s literally her treasure.

Like no wonder bro compensates so bad, look at the cellar arc again in how he had a broken leg but stand up. Lenore comments:

“Their loyalty might be more fragile than it looks. Maybe he’s worried if he shows weakness, he’d lose control over them.”

Be weak = lose control over ppl or himself or over anything over all.

Back to Montresor and Samsung.

Samantha says “You’ve had the devil inside you since the day you were born.” Right after the there no helping you my treasure.

And yeah you can’t be helped fr bro, you was born with the devil inside you, no much to do with you other than keep under control for the rest of your life.

He gets angry then again and his eyes change to demon like.

Then he pukes the demon out- or well it leaves him?

The fuck ass hellish goat is birthed and stands on the symbol of Belial - Belial in Hebrew Bible originally meant “Worthlessness” or “Lawlessness” or “Wickedness.” The word itself means Without Worth, or usefulness.

So this demon in Montresor is created because of all of this. Before he even pukes it out and is forced to look up at his mother we can see the symbol itself being on the floor, not lightened up. As it can either mean it already being prepared by her or just the view that when you stand before God (since it’s where the cross was up on the wall) you put yourself in the state of being worthless.

Which woah again is insane, as the message in the Bible over all is the opposite in every way overall. But that’s then again the corruption.

The circle symbol thing lightens up in red, and Montresor is shaking on the floor. This a beautiful visual of what stuff like these can do to us, as we in fact do have something that can be described as a ‘demon’ in us. Aka the wounds and the ways we try to save ourselves and protect ourselves.

Also that doesn’t excuse our actions and doesn’t make Montresor not a villain in any way, it just explain him. This is NOT and apologist thing, I’ll jump before I’ll become that. But then when someone doesn’t hate on something bad every three seconds they must dislike waffles since they are taking about pancakes or smth.

“God have mercy.” Above the goat thing, is said by the figures we can guess from the font of the text.

The candles form around the circle and idk if that means shit since they’ve been floating around before or if it’s just decorative.

Then we get the visual of the figures praying out loud and saying the words Montresor has forgotten, as the demon attacks them.

Montresor gets blood on his face and looks up shocked and laughs at it. Because they’ve gotten what they deserved in his mind now.

Now idk what to say abt this panel, im totally missing out on the probably double meaning of it but it’s 3 am.

Then we switch pov to what’s actually happening and it’s Montresor choking his best friend on the floor. Parallel to the demon choking a cloaked figure shadow.

Lenore then says all kind of stuff to him, mocking him as “you, the devil you are.” “Ain’t scared of nutthin’ and no-body.” And he just agrees. And then she clocks him in with the “You’re always scared. Aren’t you?”

And he totally is.

Annabel then saying that if he wants help he’ll have to ask them for it is insane too, because we just saw what his beliefs/experiences are on asking for help.

Not to mention his overall power status going down if he does so.

“All he needs to do is ask for our help. But if his pride is more important to him than his life, who am I to argue?”

And that’s funny because for Montresor it’s not just pride, it ends up being it of course, but him thinking that he is worse than everyone around him is making him compensate in acting as if he’s better than everyone ig or trying/believing that he actually is and trying to reject how he was treated, and both thinking you’re better than everyone around you as well as thinking you’re the worst of the worst is being prideful, since in both you let yourself believe that you know better.

Which is tricky. Bro is defo stuck. His mother may not be around but he carries the cross on his neck. Idk what that symbolizes for him, if it’s a sign of his fate, of his mother still holding power over him, or something entirely else, or all at once.

Montresor’s first words after fairing and being awakened to be “I’m not,” and “I didn’t!” Are creepy as heck and sad.

And the fact that after saying those same words he has to ask for help again. A stranger. And Annabel replying the same way his mother did? “I’m quite certain you’re beyond help, Montresor.”

Montresor 💀 My treasure. Bye.

Also now I’m conflicted if him asking her why she hates him sm is like him getting a chance to ask his mother why she hated him sm?

Idk maybe it’s a reach. But we see that Montresor respects Annabel and that makes sense.

Then in episode 115 we see that when Eulalie ignores Montresor, which can make him feel un important or unworthy of attention, instantly maddens him.

Then he pretty much just shifts the words around like a professional and manipulates Will’s understanding of the situation into what he wants him to see/what he sees.

Then in the latest free chapter we see that Montresor did NOT in fact leave Will alone. Which says a LOT. It gives him a whole new side making him even more humane in his actions. Not to mention the fact that he SHIELDS Will with his own Body. And compliments him in the minimum way.

He treats Will the way his mother treated him in many ways, but there’s the MAIN big difference.

Okay but now we can finally get a conclusion to this thing.

Those two pages from a book I was reading are giving Monty I think. (hi Willspero nation)

We don’t know why Montresor is deemed to be born with the devil inside of him. Is it because of who his father might be? Or because he was meowed under no wedding circumstance? Did his father leave?

The shame of that would be left on his mother I guess? His mother is referred to as Mother rather than just mother, so she might be a nun or smth of high status and those usually make vows of not holding hands with guys.

Samantha could’ve lied or done something who knows, either way the father seems not to be around I think, and him leaving her would be a ‘good cause’ for her manipulating Montresor to never leave her.

We don’t know her story but if she got some abandonment issues or some shit she is definitely taking it out on him in the most malicious way possible. She might’ve been shamed for having a child and put that shame on Montresor too.

She mocks him for his anger, the way in earlier post I’ve talked about how Annabel mocks Ada for throwing a tantrum. Annabel does it to get out of a situation where she is held captive, Monty’s mother does it to keep someone captive. Ig?

“You’re either born a gambler or yer not.” You’re born this way or that way. Therems no change in life, you’re either this or that. He can’t change, he is born worthless is what is his core belief, and its in war against the new extreme of being better than anyone else. I think?

He has earned his misery, he deserves it, that’s his core belief that his mother gave him, and now he built a sub personality to contradict that, because he hates how it makes him feel, be seen, and treated.

He can’t accept healthy shame and tries to be more than a human. He strongly identifies with being strong, he disowns the trait of being weak, and “every disowned part has an opposite energy with which your protector/controller is identified with.”

So you don’t have to be religious to have healthy fundamentals, but she ruins the idea of any healthy principles for him by using the one that are shown in Christian religion and using them to control, so now no matter where he’d find good basic morals, he’d connect them to this, and reject them.

The devil that crawls out of him is part of his biggest fear of what she saying being the truth, that he’s at fault and not strong and powerful, but then he finds reassurance in it, he -I think- finds some peace in accepting that lie of being wrong, because it stops the war inside of him, but also contradicts itself by letting him feel strong as the cursed one. That they all fear him.

At last panel in the flashback chapter he just holds himself and laughs because I think we all can imagine how weird of a relief it must be to accept the lies but find strength in them and making them your own, even if they still are the ones that control you, you find some place of power and less helplessness in them. If u cant escape, at least u can do that.

Annabel manipulating Ada’s self worth - ‘lose him = loosing her self worth’ - Monty beliefs that people only will care for him when he is strong are being affirmed and reinforced

So going back to the orange text I started with, I’d like to show how everything that happens around Monty is just happening, but how he understands the world and which traumas he has had and what conclusion he has drawn, based on the certain understandings he has had at whatever age it happened all to him or kept happening, and then the decision he made on those flawed conclusions, and what patterns were created upon making those decisions.

Every character does that, so far I think? Ada has understood something to a specific extent about and concluded that true love is the priority in life. She started making decisions on this understanding and it created those patterns of swiping right on the wrong guys.

We don’t know what created that understanding, but we know that her self worth is connected to external forces.

Either way, Montresor accepting the fact that he’s the devil in a way, is a way of him taking control back in a deluded way. He turns around the judgements placed upon him and they grant him the illusion of power and strength.

And just for insurance I guess, he is the villain, this is not excusing him, he goes around acting all bleh and ew and he will deserve the consequences for that and he deserves the ones he gets now. He is not a good guy, and he doesn’t need to be.

He is not changing/wanting to change, because that would go against his whole thing. Does that mean I wouldn’t like to see him change? No. I would love to. But people like that hardly does ig since they’re so trapped. Montresor was trapped for how long we don’t know by his mother and even when he’s left and lives his life we see how deeply that wounded him.

He is still trapped, but maybe for him, being like this was what let him escape his community and his mother. Idk life is complex and his character story is too.

His spectre does have golden chains around him and his power is making deals and such. Would make sense.

[dontevenpmodarlin]

[dontevenpmodarlin]

Ada’s idea of love is tied to power, validation and stability, rather than real genuine connections. And with that I don’t mean that she cannot love normally or anything, but that her idea of love is heavily influenced by rather specific experiences she has had in life before she even meet Thomas

She fixates on powerful men bcus they represent an ideal of power, strength, control or/and protection.

Her constant shifting in personality- as in acting posh to fit in with lee’s and around Prospero- and then more chill when in Montrio may suggest she doesn’t have a strong sense of self (Ik it’s Will’s thing but she kinda gives that vibe)

We know her self esteem is at an all times low with how she speaks of herself when rejected by Prospero. We already knew that her pretending to be all posh and better than others was one of those simple and hardly rare in life methods for her to feel better about herself, to fit in, and try to push the image of who’d she’d like to be seen as onto others.

Whatever grants validation, kinda.

At core, what Ada wants the most is truly just what anyone in life wants, love, understanding, and validation. Whatever has had happened in her life must’ve make her believe that she doesn’t deserve any of it, we saw how when she broke down she called herself stupid and ugly but in that sad way of asking “why?”

None of these things make her stupid or silly.

She’s build her entire identity around being desirable. Accepting that her approach to love isn’t right would destroy her.

Her manifesting was caused by Prospero’s harsh rejection in which ‘I could never love someone like you’ is what shatters her fully.

And when it switches to Tommy flashback, and we see her being betrayed, she asks why, and he answers that it’s because she gave him no choice, putting all the blame onto her. And in the latest flashbacks we see what kind of self centered and egoistical twat he is.

What she screams in her banshee form is “Do you think I’m stupid?” Which are her self doubts and projections.

The interesting thing is that a part of her abilities is ‘Fear itself’ which we see in how she uses it against Prospero and Annabel and later on Monty, where she makes them see their worst fears. The fact that she possesses such an ability is genius. Throwing people in a trance where they spiral paranoid into their worst fears?

And what breaks her out of it? Annabel uses her fear against her to instead force Ada into her self loathing circle, forcing her to leave Annabel alone and out of her fears. She forced Ada into her fears. Because when Ada falls into them they’re like a trance.

“A wounded little girl, throwing a fit, because she didn’t get what she wanted.”

She’s putting the blame on her (I’m not saying she isn’t to blame, but this is said harshly in ways to trivialize Ada’s feelings, reducing her emotions to something meaningless, twisting the blame onto her and making her question her reality. Smart of Annie to say, but very hurtful.)

“And I pity you, Ada.”

Which no one wants to be, that’s opposite of respect.

“No one will take you seriously again.”

Whilst Annabel has a right to these words (we ain’t hating on her, she’s smart, kinda stupid as well in her own beliefs, cruel but smart)

“Unless you cease this hideous display at once.”

Giving her an ultimatum, calling what she truly is (their forms do lowkey reflect on who they r after all) hideous.

What it took to break Ada out from her spectre? What does she fear the most after not being lovable? Stuff that prevent her from being loved ofc. That her feelings are invalid, she’s just throwing a fit, she’s hideous and ugly and no one will ever respect her or take her seriously.

“H-hideous” Moss babe says, looking at her hand.

She has built a fragile illusion around herself that keeps her from falling apart. The stuff that let her feel on the surface that’s she’s beautiful, desirable and worthy of love are dependent on outside forces: such as men🙄 (lmao, bbg let me treat you better on the wlw side-🧑🏻‍🦰) ((Morella stfu)) and since it’s dependent on other people, which are moving and changing forces, it’s fragile.

Y’all shocked she gets with Montresor when they both depend on people on the outside for self validation. If she and William were to make out aggressively when Monty dies in episode 184, y’all still would be shocked.

Anyway, self doubt starts to creep, and what she always feared- that’s she’s hideous, unworthy of love, unlovable over all- that all men who used her, treated her like nothing, were right. As Thomas said, she gave him no choice.

She breaks down apologizing and crying and telling everyone she didn’t mean it and promising that she’s a real lady, a proper lady- since that is what makes her worthy and lovable in her head.

It’s no wonder that she rejects Morella when she tries to help her. She’s self loathing rn, accepting that someone may care about her just for how he is, and even in this state, is unacceptable to her, because she herself cannot love herself in this state. So others must be simply lying.

She lashes out because she can’t bear to let anyone see her like this, raw and exposed. The shame, the fear, and the realization that maybe she’s been fooling herself all along, it’s too much. So she pushes everyone away before they can confirm what she dreads the most

Beautiful thing here is the rhythm of her words, her hitting herself, and Montresor taking steps down the stairs all fitting into one scene that is delightful to imagine. The visual aspect of her hitting herself and the devil nearing, his steps closing in with every self hating comment she makes, and with her guard being lowered down to hopelessness, is mastery in writing and drawing so props for that besties.

Ada at core has beliefs of being stupid, mean and ugly.

Stupid as in not posh-manipulating-lying smart and fitting in I’d guess. Idk what she sees as smart.

Mean, as in rejecting Morella, or being mean to people to impress others even tho she knows it’s wrong - cut to the “Pissing all by thy self, handsome?” Scene-

BRAND NEW NEWS, ADA IS NOT STUPID CONFIRMED THREE YEARS AGO.

Be a darling and try to focus on how Ada is self aware, knows why she acted the way she did, but even if she knew that it was wrong of her when she did it, she had no self control then. She needs someone, she needs to matter the most to anyone in any way.

No shock she doesn’t react well to

“Nothing you say will make you good enough.” -Prospero.

She feels silly, she apologizes, she explains how she felt and apologizes fr for being cruel for ‘no reason’ Girl woke up in a life death game and found out her roomie has a crazy goth bestie that is willing to cause drama and public embarrassment to make sure Ada’s roomie is ok. Duh girl felt vulnerable n left out.

So when Monty appears with “I think you’re pretty.” It’s no shock she says “That’s not funny.”

But then he pulls his face card and a serious voice seeing honest asf telling her that he wasn’t trying to be funny.

He, opposite to Morella, finds her when she’s not in anger any more but in hopelessness and in pieces. He feeds her delusions rather than simply offering what Morella wanted to give. Since Ada can’t allow herself to be loved unconditionally (even if that’s what she wishes the most, girlie doesn’t realize she puts conditions in her head herself on when and in what form she’d be allowed to be loved in such way, making it impossible for others to love her in that way) She would rather accept someone loving her like this.

And how does a Montresor ‘love’ her? Surprise of the day is that the things he says to her don’t even necessarily have to be lies in any sort of way. He is a meddling guy, people that are the most dangerous in life, (very much the same way the most dangerous beliefs we can have) are the ones who mix truth with lies in order to shift perception of the reality.

He can appreciate stuff about her, the lacing she gave Prospero and him being fortunate to be above the snakes.

Him telling her that it was beautiful, and that she’s beautiful doesn’t have to be a lie in any way. He doesn’t need to think of her ugly, he just needs to see what she wants to be seen as the most, and no matter if he thinks that she’s hot for nearly killing the prettiest boy in school, he is going to let her know that, because that lets him manipulate her.

Y’all shocked and thinking she’s silly for falling into this, or stupid. Well, good morning to you too, imagine your worst fears being let out under from all the illusions you keep daily, and some hot blond guy comes and tells you say your lowest that hey babe we can totally keep those illusions up, I’ll lie whenever dw abt that you won’t even know, you’ll feel worthy and will be able to avoid all your GREATEST fears (pls remember that everyone now days avoid what they fear the most, and that in mf 1930’s you wouldn’t hold up anyone to a standard of facing their worst fears cuz it’s ‘healthy’ for em) and also feel all the things you want to feel the most.

He offers her a quick escape of her own hell, back into the world that she has built and wants to live in. He is the boulder her self worth is propped on, he knows how this works because he himself most probably has lived through such things when young, and sees it as the way of being. You’re either strong and decide or weak and serve others. He needs a cute squad to survive this game, so he needs a hello kitty pants girl to his cat boi if he wants to be the true alpha daddy.

Episode 113 I cite

“I did something stupid…. I’m stupid~.” - Ada dying.

“My hero! I knew you’d come back for me. You make me so happy… Honey.”

“O-oh sorry I got mixed up. I remember now. You said No. I’m not… good enough… for you.”

This either proves that it doesn’t specifically matter in her head who is it that loves her, but that there’s a figure that does, and she just mixes it up as in thinking that Prospero is taking up the role of being that. Or she thought it was Yeehaw. Or god knows, maybe Twatmas.

Anyway she needs someone to fulfill that role for her to feel stable and to be able to act, the way everyone in life needs some sort of stability, but most of the thing- well I’m optimistic- we find it in ourselves, not in the outer world on which we have oh so little power over, compared to the amount of control we can manage to maintain without ourselves.

What emotion was it that triggered her flashbacks whilst doin’ rodeo on the stag? I’d guess holding on, the way she tried to hold onto Thomas, emotionally or physically- whatever.

Anyway what I wanted to say with all of this, is that Ada is not stupid, silly, or anything. It’s normal to see her actions and facepalm because we feel the sting of ‘oh no darling, this isn’t the way’ cuz we all hate going in circles and we know how annoying it is to realize you’re in one, and seeing other ppl or characters be in such can either throw you into a fit of empathy or annoyance, depending on how you feel about yourself when you notice yourself living in such ways and experiencing such things.

Her behavior may be driven by unresolved childhood trauma or repression.

Her ID aka primal desires crave love, security, and validation. She throws herself at powerful divas cuz they represent control and protection.

Her super ego aka moral conscience shaped by social expectations, tells her that she must be desirable an perfect to be loved “a proper lady” she suppresses any feelings of insecurity by kinda forcing herself to believe in her beauty and worth ig?

Her ego aka the balancing force, struggles to reconcile these forces, so she builds a false self, a persona, to attract love and hide her deepest fears. Which as usually in life just brings her closer to her fears and makes everyone see who she is.

Because unlike Montresor who is good at lying, Ada isn’t. She is closer to finding who she is because of that, whilst he is closer to doom.

By Freud (don’t grill me) he’d call this repetition trauma I think, repetition compulsion.

She keeps pursuing Divas who reject or use her, she’s unconsciously recreating past traumas hoping to “fix” them, perhaps?

She uses denial & defense mechanism. She uses denial to avoid confrontation with her self hatred. Her reaction to rejection is to outwardly act confident to suppress the deep belief that she’s hideous. Aka Reaction formation (“Reaction Formation happens when an individual exhibits behaviors opposite to their actual feelings” - google)

Her outbursts with “STOPP lookin at me Jason! 🥺” are projections, she pushes people away because she believes that they see her the way she secretly sees herself.

Also why she pushed Morella away, right after Annabel told her that she pitied her?. Maybe in her mind that’s what Morella did, pitied her. After all she accuses her of lying.

Ada doesn’t love those all random guys perhaps, but the idea of them and what they provide for her, which Ik ive said like three times alr but protection, power, security and validation. She chases an ideal, not a real connection.

She projects her desire for love onto men mistaking their coldness for strength and indifference for being mysterious.

She needs to reach a point where she will be forced to face herself, and idk when that will happen, maybe soon since she is dissolving into atoms. Anyway Lenada when?