dorksidefiker

[dorksidefiker]

"𝙉𝙝𝙝! Home!" "How 𝙨𝙞𝙢𝙥𝙡𝙚 you make that sound. You have a home… You can easily get there. I 𝙚𝙣𝙫𝙮 you, fleshling!" "Go. Do what I cannot. 𝙂𝙤 𝙝𝙤𝙢𝙚!"

This is a redrawing of the cover from “Stargazing.” I really liked the “Stargazing” issue from the old comics, especially since the lines fit EarthSpark Starscream so well too, and I can see him saying these exact lines to the Terrans.

[dorksidefiker]

[dorksidefiker]

What makes each cat “unadoptable”?

Rodimus: Hyperactive with mild Wobbly Cat Syndrome. Can’t be unsupervised in a kitchen or a non-padded environment. He is extremely hyperactive and gets depressed when he doesn’t get attention from people or the other cats.

Drift: Has a furniture scratching problem and likes to try to escape. Doesn’t like to be separated from Rodimus or Ratchet. Afraid of thunderstorms.

Ratchet: as a visibly older cat, he is already tough to adopt out. He needs several different medicines that are taken at mealtimes.

Ultra Magnus: A big boy, and he’s not outwardly affectionate towards humans. He seemingly obsesses over grooming himself and the other cats.

Megatron: doesn’t like humans. However, a few months at the shelter, he begins to soften up towards Rung and Ravage. Regardless, his hostility scares off any potential adopters. Afraid of thunderstorms and doctors.

Tailgate: he is small and friendly, but most adopters back off once they find out how old he is. Any remaining potential adopters decline once they find out he’s bonded to Cyclonus.

Cyclonus: Has the worst scratching problem out of all the cats, no furniture is safe, nor the pant legs of any potential adopters. Also frequently seen fighting the goose through the window.

First Aid: Needs medicine and is nice about taking it, but tends to hide away under furniture when new people arrive.

Red Alert: An extremely nervous cat, he runs and hides when new people arrive and doesn’t come out for hours afterwards. He also needs medicine to manage his anxiety.

Fort Max: The largest cat in the shelter, he’s shy around new people. He’ll try to sit in people’s laps and accidentally suffocate them. The amount of food he needs turns most adopters away. Afraid of thunderstorms and large/loud people.

Skids: Bites people.

Nautica: Drops her wrench on people’s toes. Also bites people.

Velocity: She’s actually fine she’s just grouped in with the rest of these weirdos. Cannot tolerate men.

Swerve: meows so often and loudly that it turns people off from adopting him. Also has a terminal catnip addiction.

Rewind: Stares at people so hard it makes them uncomfortable

Chromedome: Also stares. It makes people uncomfy when two cats are staring at them like they’re an omen of death.

Perceptor: Cannot be unsupervised in a kitchen. Also bonded with Brainstorm.

Brainstorm: Cannot be unsupervised near anything sharp. Tends to get random destructive fits of energy that can last for up to an hour. Tends to start fires.

Honorable mentions + notes about the other characters:

Whirl: The goose that lives in the parking lot. He cannot fly but that doesn’t stop him from attacking anyone that comes near his nest, which happens to be right next to the front door. He serves as a vibe check for potential adopters and keeps Rung humbled.

Ravage: An emo that needs community hours to graduate. They accidentally became attached.

Rung: Specializes in cat behavior and care, and is careful about accomodating each cat’s needs. Every time he tries to make the cat rooms nice for visitors, the cats destroy it in minutes.

Thunderclash: the shelter’s number one funder and general nice guy. All the cats love/tolerate him except for Rodimus, who attacks him at any given opportunity.

[dorksidefiker]

“What do you mean the tower is gone? Are you sure you’re in the right place? I actually used more colorful words than that,” Brett Elmore recounted to NBC News. “He said there’s wires all over the ground and the tower is gone.”

[dorksidefiker]

[dorksidefiker]

Hey. Why isn’t the moon landing a national holiday in the US. Isn’t that fucked up? Does anyone else think that’s absurd?

[dorksidefiker]

The bakers ARE working on a time crunch and the adverse conditions of "in a tent in summer", plus whatever else might be going on.

I know that some British people take umbridge at Americans calling the Great British Bake Off relaxing, but it's just because GBBO is such a different kind of stressful from American baking shows.

American baking shows will be called something like "Cupcake Knife Fight", there's horror movie lighting everywhere and dramatic stings every 5 seconds. All of the contestants are shit talking each other and fist fighting over the one single deep fryer provided by production. It will show the judges all whispering to each other at their super villain table overlooking the whole kitchen, and one will be like, "Oh my god. Everyone look at Brenda right now. She's straight tanking it." And it will cut to Brenda, who is running around covered in flour and crying and also bleeding for some reason. Then you get a clip from an interview with one of the contestants, and they're like, "I really need to win this. Without this award money, I'm gonna need to close my restaurant, sell my dad, and live out of my car. AGAIN." Then the giant digital doomsday clock overhead lets out a horrid klaxon, the judges tell half of them that their cupcakes taste disgusting, and one of them gets eliminated and sent to walk down the dramatically-lit shame hallway never to be seen again.

Meanwhile GBBO is in a lovely, brightly colored tent, there are delightful and friendly hosts/jesters there to keep everyone entertained, and all of the B Roll is of like... a bumblebee going into a flower, or a lamb running in a field. And yes, there will be moments where someone will mess up their timing or something, and they'll be looking at their bake through the oven door like, "oh gosh I don't think this will rise in time!" Then they stand up to find Paul Hollywood directly behind them ominously. His creepy whitewalker eyes will glow white, and he'll say something like "the 12th of June. 2035. Drowning." And his eyes will go back to normal and he'll walk away. Then the baker gives a playful grimace to the camera and says "that didnt sound great, did it?". Cut to a sweet looking older woman sipping tea on a stool and she says "oo I do hope that Prue enjoys the taste of my sugary, sticky baps!". Then, at the end, someone gets a gold star for doing good, and the loser of the episode gets in the middle of a giant group hug. You see all of them at the end of the series at a giant carnival with their families and the post credits informs you that all of the contestants have become a Partridge Family-style traveling band and stayed friends forever.

[dorksidefiker]

Vintage Tattoo Inspired Thunderclash!

I unironically love him!

[dorksidefiker]

I got tagged in this by @banahbanah

"Describe yourself ONLY with pictures you have, you CANNOT search or download new pictures"

[dorksidefiker]

NOBODY EXPECTS THE SPANISH IMPOSITION!

Once upon a time, this song had lyrics.  They were awful, and best lost to time

[dorksidefiker]

Leverage: Redemption 3x9- "The Polygeist Job"

[dorksidefiker]

Foglio Publishing News

Discordia Publishing will be doing a XXXenophile reprint omnibus through Kickstarter! You can sign up to be notified when it launches. I'm told it will NOT be available in stores, so grab it when you can.

[dorksidefiker]

No, no, not Swamp Thing: just Holland.

Just picture it. Our second favorite embodiment of nature being actively haunted by the man he thinks he was, providing color commentary that only we the audience can here.

[dorksidefiker]

Okay, I'm drawing a line in the fucking sand, here. Do not read the Latin.

The Cabin in the Woods (2011) - dir. Drew Goddard

[dorksidefiker]

I'm not sure I'm digging Nicholas Hoult's new blond look. For as long as I've known of him, his hair has either been a somewhat uncontrolled brown, or bald.

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Falling for Gaza scam bots because you are a nice person who just cares too much does not make it less embarrassing btw. I’m sorry that you lose all common sense over it but they are the most obvious bots I have ever seen

[dorksidefiker]

…at the finale of Abbott and Costello Meet Frankenstein, Bud and Lou encounter yet a fourth Universal Classic Monster! The Invisible Man played here by Vincent Price making a special cameo “non-appearance”! Can you see him in this picture? Of course not!

(hint: he’s holding a cigarette.)