dysmotility - Tumblr blog

[dysmotility]

angel sighting

(old butch at the DMV with crows feet)

I believe in god

(she’s wearing a puffer vest and dickies)

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“israel is the only place jews can be safe” BITCH HAVE U EVER HEARD OF THE UPPER WEST SIDE

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moving houses as an autistic person is my actual nightmare.

i’m moving this weekend and i just want to hibernate through it. i want to bury myself somewhere deep in the ground and just come out when it’s all over. i referred to this feeling as wanting to “shelter in place,” to my therapist. the panic. the dissociation. the freeze and flight responses.

if any other autistic adults have experience moving, esp if u live in nyc, i would love any advice

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This list includes doctors in the United States, Australia, Canada, and Europe!

Even if you're not the target demographic, please share for any of your friends who may be.

And if you or someone you know would like to be added to the list, there's a place for that!

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depressing news for US people with mental health issues (depressingly unsurprising) - first part pasted below:

The rapid growth of the new 988 mental health hotline has been greeted with positive media coverage. As many people expected, calls, texts, and chats to the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline, now renamed “988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline,” started climbing immediately with the launch of the 988 number in July of 2022. The Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) and the nonprofit that was given centralized control over the 988 system, Vibrant Emotional Health (VEH), have been releasing monthly updates on key metrics.

In April 2023, compared to April 2022, calls answered increased by 52%, chats by 90%, and texts by 1022%. The trend was heralded by federal Health and Human Services Secretary Xavier Becerra to CNN: “Our nation’s transition to 988 moves us closer to better serving the crisis care needs of people across America. 988 is more than a number, it’s a message: we’re there for you.”

However, as previously reported by Mad in America, a percentage of people who contacted the former National Suicide Prevention Lifeline were subjected to geolocation tracing of their phone, computer, or mobile device. The Lifeline advertised itself as a place for confidential discussions about suicidal feelings but, according to its own policy, if a call-attendant believed a person might be at “imminent risk” of taking their own life in the next few hours, days, or week, the call-attendant was required to contact 911 or a Public Safety Answering Point to send out police and/or an ambulance to forcibly take the person to a psychiatric hospital.

Many Lifeline users described the experiences of betrayal, public exposure, police interactions, loss of freedoms, and forced psychiatric treatment as dangerous, harmful and traumatizing.

So, since the transition to 988, has anything changed? As contacts to 988 rise, how many people are getting forcibly subjected to these types of unexpected, unwanted interventions?

It appears detention numbers are climbing dramatically, too—even as VEH, SAMHSA, and many news outlets continue to obfuscate the facts publicly.

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I'm trying to think of a way to articulate my feelings on like... what cripplepunk actually means. There's a lot of talk on who can call themselves a cripple but not too much on how like... if someone describes the economy as "crippled" they're saying it doesn't work. If someone is described as having "crippling" social anxiety, they mean that person is so anxious they can't function in society so they might as well be a cripple.

Cripple means broken and useless. We're seen as a bad and redundant part of society, something to be fixed or forgotten about.

CripplePUNK is about taking that place in society, really a not-place, and saying yeah, I AM worthless to most of society, people don't want to be me or be around me because I make them uncomfortable just by existing. We're considered the lowest of the low and the most useless of the useless. We used to be called invalids for a reason. And fuck you my life is worth it anyways. I'm going to give my worthless life the meaning I choose to give it. I'm not going to spend my entire life trying to be a good cripple and do all my physical therapy and eat perfectly and be nice to people who "didn't mean it" and everything else to try and be worthy of respect from people who think my life is worth than death, I'm going to do what I think is worthwhile and if you don't like me or like the way I live then you can go fuck yourself.

If you're not willing to take on all the baggage of being a cripple, cool. A lot of people don't want that, but cripplepunk is about throwing your disability and your 'uselessness' to society back in their face and experiencing disability on your own terms.

It's also acknowledging some people DON'T make it and their lives were just as worthwhile no matter how short.

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yes, i will be smoking/vaping AND wearing a mask because 1. i care about other people ?? and 2. i contain multitudes

Reminder that I deserve help and compassion even though I smoke sometimes and even though I drink and even though I’m a nasty cripple that drinks at two in the morning and smokes socially sometimes knowing full well I have lung issues. I deserve help and love and compassion and I do this shit because the medical system is failing me. Stop scolding me like I’m a child who’s smoking and because I’m not, I’m an adult, and I’m a cripple, and I smoke and I drink booze and FUCK YOU.

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my first word was dada. yes like the art movement i was a precocious child

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joining the war on “pretentiousness” on the side of the pretentious

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one of the main failings of the disease model of addiction is that it doesn't actually say that drug use or alcohol use is morally neutral. it says that people who do them cannot help themselves; it's not "their fault".

which still maintains the belief that drug/alcohol use are, fundamentally, Bad, just some people have Diseases which Force Them To Do Bad Things. it actually fits very neatly within reactionary + puritanical beliefs about drug/alcohol use + the benefits it has for reducing stigma/violence against ppl who use drugs (which it has evidently done, to some extent!) are limited by this

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my hobbies? uhh.. peeling back the layers…. uncovering metaphors.. mirroring…..connecting dots…..stuff like that

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as a new yorker, it saddens me the ways i see people react to visibly psychotic (typically unhoused) people on the streets or in the subway. being mentally ill in public has been criminalized, but it is not a moral failing.

Respect and support all psychotic people.

Respect and support psychotic people in psych wards.

Respect and support psychotic people in prison.

Respect and support psychotic people who use drugs.

Respect and support psychotic people who can't hide their symptoms.

Respect and support psychotic people who are homeless.

If you say you respect and support psychotic people no one is exempt.

If you are disgusted, scared of, or laugh at psychotic people on the street that talk to themselves you cannot say you respect and support psychotic people.

Just because a psychotic person is less privileged, and less socially acceptable to you, does not give you a pass to be sanist.

This shouldn't have to be said but every human deserves basic respect.

People who are mentally ill, have no money, have no support, can't hide their symptoms, make bad choices and don't fit into the social norms, are not any less human than anybody else.

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any other autistics have debilitating anxiety about their hair?

(disclaimer: im a white autistic, but i would love to hear from Black autistics about their relationship with autism + hair)

i have trichotillomania and part of that for me is compulsively cutting my hair. it’s this cycle of anxiety about my hair, i cut more of it thinking that will fix it, i freak out more because now it’s a lot shorter and will take so long to grow back out, and then i have to pay someone to fix it professionally.

my hair was the longest it had been in three years and i just fucked it up again. i’m making an appointment to fix it on saturday but i’m just having a really hard time with it right now. it feels silly to be upset about something as superficial as hair but it means a lot to me. i’m also very self conscious about my appearance and this is a big part of it. idk i’m just really overwhelmed

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i’m not sure how i feel about the paraphilias thing yet just cuz idk a lot about it so take that with a grain of salt but YES to all of this

If you don't judge people for saying "sorry ahdh brain" in public, then don't judge people for saying "sorry schizophrenia brain" in public

If you correct people when they misuse the term "ocd" then you need to correct people when they misuse the terms "psychotic", "delusional", "hallucinating" and "schizophrenic"

If you don't stare, laugh at or fear a stranger in public flapping their hands, then you need to do the same for a stranger in public talking to someone who isn't actually there.

If you give a trigger warning to sensitive topics then you need to give a trigger warning to unreality and false information as a prank.

If you want to normalize medication like antidepressants you also need to normalize medications like antipsychotics.

If you don't like people without your disorder joking about it online and report it as harassment, then you need to do the same for the tons of nonschizophrenics making "schizoposting" memes to make fun of us.

Just please include schizo-spec and psychotic acceptance into your mental illness/neurodiversity acceptance. We are part of your community whether you like it or not. We are constantly stigmatized, misrepresented and made fun of. We do what we can to help you, please return the favor.

Mental illness/neurodiversity acceptance is an ongoing action. We will get nowhere in the long run if we split the community into the "in" group and the "out" group. We could all accomplish so much if we worked together. But you need to include the "weird" people that don't fit into your aesthetic and don't fit the social norms.

Us psychotics and schizo-specs have been struggling for years and have been the only people fighting for ourselves while the people we plead to barely see us as human. If you are nonpsychotic and nonschizo-spec, you can help us more than you realize. Please include us and stick up for us the same way we have been including and sticking up for you.

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and other intellectual disabilities too!

hey now that it’s disability pride month can you please remember to include people with Down syndrome and other chromosomal defects into your activism. they’re so often left behind. I literally never see anyone spreading Down syndrome awareness that isn’t close family of someone with Down syndrome. They exist and they’re living breathing humans who deserve just as much activism as every other disabled person

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happy disability pride month to people with congenital neurological conditions specifically

to people who grew up with strabismus, muscle contractures, spasticity, dystonia, hypertonia, hypotonia, different gaits, weak or paralyzed faces, lazy eye, speech issues because of tongue mouth or throat problems, short stature, delayed aging, scoliosis, kyphosis, and lordosis

happy disability pride month to people who know what i mean by "laugh like a seal", to people who have a hard time laughing or crying, to people who drool and people who always have their mouths open and people with heavy eyelids and people who swallow loudly or who have to move their heads in a specific way to swallow, and to people who are incontinent

to people who are also intellectually disabled or developmentally disabled or cognitively disabled or learning disabled, to people who also have brain injuries or issues with brain development, to people who scream, yell, moan, grunt, and groan, to people who hit themselves or hit everything else, to people who scratch and bite and growl and hiss, to people who are nonverbal or semiverbal, to people who cry or get mad or get excited easily and especially if then you can't calm down, to people who can't understand or do things people think are simple, to people who just don't fucking know and don't have the words, to people whose brain feels like a place where both the sky and the ground blend together, to people who just feel fucking lost

happy disability pride month to people who grew up being bullied by other kids and mistreated by adults and having to see people like you always being the joke or villain or bad person on tv and on the internet both in popular memes and just from anyone and irl, to people who got or get treated like a child or a creep or a dog

i'm not articulating well but i don't ever know how to talk about this and i'm running on grief

i see ableism against people with neurological conditions literally everywhere, it is inescapable. i see people make fun of strabismus all the time, though likely without knowing what it is and idk if that makes it better or worse, my bullies would beat their hands against their chests when they saw me, many online memes came from making fun of people with neurological conditions, people joke about having brain damage all the time, the "duh" voice people use is acting as if you're neurologically disabled, it's such a pervasive fucking part of culture at least in us america that you can't help but feel like you shouldn't exist, and many people think you shouldn't

and it's exhausting