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I'm evolving into the person I want to be.

[ed-recovery-affirmations]

viktojadesigns

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Bless the messy on instagram

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hope your days get softer from here on out. hope the hurt lessens and the dark turns to light. you deserve gentleness and good love. I hope it finds you soon.

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NOT ONLY did I get to have more cherries, I got to try the spicy pickle Doritos today and they are FABULOUS.

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Ooh, glad you found that! I don’t believe I’ve ever had clotted cream!

Y'all influenced me! I got cherries. Had some last night! Now I am planning to have more, with a goat cheese spread and honey.

[ed-recovery-affirmations]

Y'all influenced me! I got cherries. Had some last night! Now I am planning to have more, with a goat cheese spread and honey.

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[ed-recovery-affirmations]

do what you need to do for yourself!! do what’s best for your wellbeing!! you do not need others’ approval to do what’s right for you if it won’t cause anyone any harm!!

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damn people rly hate type 2 diabetics don't they

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what if it all works out. HOW ABOUT THAT HUH

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I'm confident in my ability to create a life I love.

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if it makes your life easier, don’t be ashamed to use it. mobility devices, braces, medications, etc. are nothing to be ashamed of or embarrassed by if they improve your quality of life.

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i’m happy you exist, that you’ve made it so far. it’s not an easy thing. waking up every morning and existing. i hope today you’re safe and that something makes you smile.

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[gripping the sink] perfectionism does not help me avoid embarrassment or shame. perfectionism is in itself a form of shame. when i struggle with perfectionism i struggle with shame. when i struggle with perfectionism i struggle with shame. when i struggle with perfectionism i struggle with shame

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i have been suffering of anorexia for a while now, and recently i've known that i dont want to continue down this path. im not currently in any form of professional treatment due to not having the money for it, so i'm trying to recover by myself. i always tell myself that "i'm going to start recovery tomorrow", and i eat more than i usually would for the day, but i always feel guilty about it and end up going back to how i usually survive by the next day, but i dont want to survive anymore, i want to live. if you have any advice as to how i can try recover without feeling overcome by that guilt, i would greatly appreciate it.

Oh this is so hard, I’m so sorry you don’t have money for the proper treatment! I’m proud of you for taking those first steps to eating well, and braving the uncomfortable feelings that come with it.

I think your next step should be to make time to be very mindful for the day after your start of a recovery attempt. You eat, and eating brings up all the uncomfortable feelings you were trying to control through restriction. Instead of trying to suppress or ignore those feelings, what if you invited them out in a non-judgmental way? Don’t tell yourself that the feelings are right or that you have to go along with them just because they’re strong, but just examine them. Journal about them, or meditate on them, or something along those lines. But try to acknowledge them in a neutral zone. So instead of catastrophizing and saying “I’ve lost all control of my body because I ate so much!” You could try noticing “Eating has become scary for me. I ate more than usual yesterday and it has brought up feelings of being out of control. I am learning to find healthy ways of channeling these feelings.” Don’t tell yourself that you’re bad or failing if you continuously struggle with this. Try to continue to notice things neutrally. “I have been doing really well in my recovery lately. That should make me proud, but I still feel scared. It makes me feel as if I can’t go back to the feelings of control I had.” That’s just an example - notice what you’re feeling and where it’s coming from, and examine those feelings in a non-judgmental context that is gentle to you even during times of prolonged distress.

You can also try prepping ready-meals and snacks for yourself on days when you really anticipate struggle. So a day when you eat especially well? Prepare some foods ahead of time that you can graze on without much effort and preparation. That way, you can get more food into yourself by eating a little bit here and there. It doesn’t necessarily matter if you eat in the traditional way, as long as you are getting enough general nutrition in. In fact, if your stomach has significantly adjusted to restriction, that might be the safest way of getting nutrition in you. As you work on your snacks, try to tell yourself that you deserve wellness. Not necessarily “you deserve this food” since food can feel like such a chore to you right now, and you may struggle at times to enjoy the food through the complicated feelings that it brings up. But you deserve wellness, long-term wellness. And making a habit of getting proper nutrition is part of the process of getting you there. As for the mental stuff, you can feel it out and learn for yourself.