edgarfrogsmind

[edgarfrogsmind]

I WAS TRYING TO TAKE OUT THE TRASH SOME HOMELESS DRUG ADDICT THREW A DILDO AT MY HEAD

it hurt

a lot

can that give me pink eye????

Besides that fact, today after work, Sam invited me to go to the beach with him since his brother is going on a date with that Star chick... Sooo guess what I'm doing tonight.

[edgarfrogsmind]

i just realized I haven't showered in like 3 days I smell like a homemade vampire repellent this is amazing I just need to go roll around in some more garlic and I'll be good to go!!

i don't think I have to drink my frog juice if I keep this up

[edgarfrogsmind]

school starts in a few days I don't want alan to embarrass me as much as he did last year because holy shit people were avoiding me like hell

What happened last year? you may be wondering.. too much. BUT! to put most of it simple; he's not sound aware in places with a ton of people, like a school, so most of the time in the halls he talks really fucking loud.

Well one time we were talking and he was talking about his weird ass buddy from out of state, and he was repeating what his friend said.. Since Alan is lout as shit, about 20 kids around us heard Alan practically SCREAM "Have u ever fked a possum? because I have!"

I had to tell about 28 people that Alan and I weren't possum fuckers.

(ooc: a scenario like this actually happened with my friend and I last year!! it wasn't fun! also I keep forgetting Abt this account but imma try to keep posting more)

[edgarfrogsmind]

"If vampires cant come inside without asking does that mean you can just keep riding that thang" -sam

[edgarfrogsmind]

guess who finally got their journal back!!

it was me. please pretend to be enthusiastic.

Anywaysss, I went to the beach with Sam and Alan last week and I took a nap so now I have this horrific tan line on my forehead from my bandanna and the rest of my face is burnt to a crisp.

Santa Carla summers make me feel like a vampire in normal sunlight

[edgarfrogsmind]

my journal has been set ablaze. writing this on Alan's copy of Snoop Doggs cookbook. The shop is dead can someone I know stop by :(

[edgarfrogsmind]

Last night I was spending the night at Sams house, we were about to fall asleep when we hear his grandpa revving up a lawnmower. I'm so done

[edgarfrogsmind]

this valentines day I'm going to the store and jumping into the cart of stuffed bears instead of asking anyone to be my valentine

People are making out in the shop love ain't shit get a LIFE PLEASEEE

[edgarfrogsmind]

why were you and Alan bullying Sam when he first walked into the shop

because he looked like a poser

I wasn't bullying or intimidating him, it was simply a vibe check and I gave him some grace cause he was very uncomfortable

[edgarfrogsmind]

So I'm at the shop today and it was really hot out today, so I decided to wear my new jeans shorts. Now they looked really good on me but then I saw ALAN wearing jeans shorts similar to mine, so obviously I was like; "Alan, change." and he was like "But this is my outfit today I planned it last night" and I was begging him to change and he was like "Nooo"

So Sam walks in and he sees my jean shorts and he's like "Those are amazing" and I thank him because I just bought them the other day and I said to him "But Alan had to copy". Sam told Alan to change and it was like a whole argument.

Anyways my jean shorts look better on me xx

[edgarfrogsmind]

Do you and/or Alan have girlfriends? Or do girls distract you from vampire hunting?

We've both dated a few girls before, but we decided they may interfere with our vampire hunting and we should just focus on that

And also some women freak the fuck out when we say "Yeah we hunt night-stalking predators that feed off of humans"

[edgarfrogsmind]

I was reaching for a box of comics on the top shelf in the break room, and t fucking fell on my head. why the fuck is paper so heavy

[edgarfrogsmind]

I literally hid in my closet for days after Alan and Sam found this book and I'm scared Alan is gonna call me a chick and that Sam wont talk to me anymore what the fuck do I do

good thing is I got my journal back... But at what cost???

[edgarfrogsmind]

alan and Sam found my diary journal and started throwing it back and forth to each other.. I saw Sam open a page and I'm hoping to God he didn't see a certain something...

[edgarfrogsmind]

alan just screamed Thick of It by KSI at me

[edgarfrogsmind]

Nuh uh jacob is NOT hot 👎👎

yes he is!!!11!1!!!1!1!

[edgarfrogsmind]

That shit was ass

I'm really happy today cause I can actually see Sam again, us and Alan are gonna watch some bullshit called 365 days I'll update on how that goes