elvisistuuoikealla

[elvisistuuoikealla]

I just realized I live in a simulation. I’m not real. Nothing matters. What’s outside the simulation? We will know after ”death”.

[elvisistuuoikealla]

I'm tired of schizophrenia, how do I cancel my subscription?

[elvisistuuoikealla]

Just watched a documentary that had Ted Bundy in it for like 5 minutes and I already feel like really anxious wtf why is he so triggering to me and my psychosis??

(Might be because my last ex bf, who I broke up with last week, manipulated me, kinda raped me and was very toxic. His ex said he tried to strangle them... etc etc. I’m happy I got out of it early enough.)

[elvisistuuoikealla]

hELL yEAH!!! I’m full of that shit ❤❤😍💕💖❤💓💞💞💓❤💖💞💕💞❤💞💓💞💖 Best watch out! I'mmmmmm feeling L❤VE!

[elvisistuuoikealla]

I was born in this world to do something and I don’t know what yet. It’s impossible to find out what if I continue on like this. I need to discover my options. The music has to contain a clue, even just a small hint. I need my earphones. They are blue and nice and will help me out massively

[elvisistuuoikealla]

Me: 2 movies I have watched talked about fate.

Me: That means something. I was born to do something great.

Also me: I have a fate. Wild huh

My friend: Vallu you have schizophrenia

Me:

Me: So

[elvisistuuoikealla]

I want my darkness. I want to never wake up

[elvisistuuoikealla]

Yayoi Kusama 

 Reflecting in the Field of Love, 2011

[elvisistuuoikealla]

Do not let them consume you. They don’t define who you are.

[elvisistuuoikealla]

[elvisistuuoikealla]

Affirmations for Psychotics

My existence matters

My psychosis does not make me a burden

Delusions do not make me unreliable

Negative symptoms do not lessen my worth

Disorganized speech does not make me unintelligent

Cognitive symptoms are not a reflection on my abilities

Psychosis stigma doesn’t mean I’m a horrible person

I am worth treatment

I worth the time of the people taking care of me

I matter

[elvisistuuoikealla]

A beautiful mind

[elvisistuuoikealla]

hey kids I just want to remind people that of you have a friend / child with delusions, don’t encourage them- jokingly or not. My main delusion is that I can see the future and I’ve told my psychologist, only to have her reply “ha ha, maybe you can!” Which, let me tell you, made the next few days MUCH worse. When I told my mother, she joked that I should “remember to buy her a lottery ticket!” which had about the same effect. Don’t encourage people’s delusions. Don’t give wake-up calls unless asked to, but DON’T encourage the delusions.

[elvisistuuoikealla]

nothing i do matters // 8.22.2017

[elvisistuuoikealla]

talking with disordered thoughts is great because sometimes you forget one (1) word and have to take an hour to venture the depths of your brain to find it OR you make up a word and hope someone understands

[elvisistuuoikealla]

i don’t think there’s much understanding about it. other than “oooh try this schizophrenia stimulation with headphones! hear creepy voices telling you bad things about yourself!!! if you had to deal with this, you’d lose control too!!!!!” 

NO! that’s not it. that is not what having schizophrenia is about.there are meaningful dimensions to it. it’s not just “crazy voice disease”. 

[elvisistuuoikealla]

I feel so weird I feel so weird I didn’t take my meds last night what is wrong with me my dreams felt so real