elysabyth - Tumblr blog

[elysabyth]

Weird ass dreams

@elysabyth made a very on brand observation about me. lol

[elysabyth]

There are no outlets in closets because you aren't supposed to live in them- my partner

[elysabyth]

I am not a woman.

But even if I was

I wouldn't owe you dresses

Or Heel. In fact I don't owe you anything

I am not a woman.

But even those who are

Don't owe you

makeup, or perfect hair days.

No one owes you that.

You don't get to dictate

How others look or dress

With your "gendered ideas"

Blue is this pink is that

Men are from here

Women from there.

We don't accept that.

I'm forging my own path

Of yellow!

Like daffodils, sunflowers,

Or dandelions

I'm forging my own path

Of white!

Like snow, daisys

Or a blank canvas

I'm forging my own path

Of purple!

Like violets, blueberries

Or regal dress of monarchs past

I'm forging my own path

Of black!

Like caves, bats

Or moonless nights

I am me

And I reject the path

You choose for me

[elysabyth]

Do yall also have these mutuals that you just??? Grew really fond of?? Like, you never properly talk to them and all you do is like each other’s posts but whenever you see them on your dash you’re like “hello sunshine, I hope you’re drinking lots of water and being happy your health and wellbeing is so important to me” and I hope that’s not weird because honestly that’s me all the time

[elysabyth]

Welcome to Build-a-Frog!

Click here to enter

[elysabyth]

soft asks:

cherry - what is your sexuality?

lollipop - favorite makeup products?

daydreams - if you could be anything or anyone, who would you be?

october - what month were you born in?

caress - do you like to snuggle?

ivory - describe your pajamas?

golden - favorite stationary product?

freckles - most-worn article of clothing?

twilight - best friend?

silk - do you like k-pop?

poppy - favorite pastel color?

dimples - most attractive features of a person’s face?

sunkissed - autumn or spring?

buttery - favorite snack?

whisper - how much sleep do you get?

pencil - do you own a journal?

cupcake - are you a good cook?

honey - favorite term of endearment?

clouds - describe one of your favorite dreams?

velvet - who was your first crush?

paper - favorite children’s book?

peaches - do you have a skincare routine?

mochi - favorite studio ghibli film?

backyard - did you ever have an imaginary friend?

strawberry - favorite fruit?

kiss - have you ever kissed a friend?,

nightlight - do you read before bed?

shampoo - favorite scent?

skin - what distant relative are you closest to?

aphrodite - favorite actress/actor?

cuddles - do you have any pets?

lace - if you own any dresses, which is your favorite?

sheets - sanrio or san-x characters?

cream - frozen yogurt flavor?

watermelon - do films ever make you cry?

sapphos - favorite poet?

plush - how many stuffed animals do you still own?

roses - what flower do you find most beautiful?

sweetheart - favorite mug/cup?

sunset - what are your pronouns?

[elysabyth]

Why is it on my ONE day off this week I end up with a migraine?

My migraines and cluster headaches are getting worse and more frequent, but I don't want to keep bothering my neurologist and just adding more medications or getting more Infusions

I've tried a lot of holistic stuff too that hasn't touched them

I'm just tired you know? Worn out, stretched thin like butter scraped over too much bread...

[elysabyth]

Why are people like this?

Every time I wear a dress to work this one coworker sees me and is like "oh going on a fancy date after work?"

I've repeatedly told her

1. My partner is in the UK, and I'm not going to try to explain polyam to her, either way I don't have anyone local...

2. It's not even fancy clothes/dresses

3. I'm not even wearing any makeup

4. Why would I dress up fancy for a date at 7 AM

She never says anything when I come to work in my nice more masc clothes

Every time she comments on my dresses I immediately hate how I look/feel and want to switch into more masc stuff

There are days I start dressed masc or fem and halfway through I'm nearly crying cuz I can't deal with it anymore

...

Is this just me? Am I just a defiant brat?

[elysabyth]

Gollums Song

Where once was light

Now darkness falls

Where once was love

Love is no more

Don't say goodbye

Don't say, I didn't try...

These tears we cry

Are falling rain

For all the lies

You told us

The hurt, the blame!

And we will weep

To be so alone

We are lost!

We can never go home

So in the end

I will be, what I will be

No loyal friend

Was ever there for me

Now we say, goodbye

We say, you didn't try

These tears you cry

Have come too late

Take back the lies

The hurt, the blame!

And you will weep

When you face the end alone

You are lost!

You can never go home

You are lost!

You can never go home

[elysabyth]

Missing you.

If anyone would have told me 6 years ago, that I would meet you, love you, need you, want you. I would have laughed.

I wasn't looking for anyone anymore. Especially not someone 5000+ miles away.

I don't think anyone looks for someone that far away, or looks for a long distance relationship to begin with. It's fucking hard.

I never would have thought I would have flown, repeatedly. That was kinda part of who I was, too afraid to fly.

But I have soared across the ocean to you, only to love it there and to wish I could be there even now.

I love the United Kingdom, would I without you? Probably, but you make it better.

Now, I would give nearly anything to have the borders open. I want to be there again with you.

But I'm here, daily being broken down by those around me. Feeling lost and lonely.

But in 16 days it'll be 6 years, can you believe it?

I love you.

[elysabyth]

Plus size, Plus size?

So, I'm fat. There's no getting around it, I am. I wear "plus size" clothes and even with that my chest region makes it difficult to find clothes that fit me properly.

Does being fat make me less valuable in society? I don't think so, I mean come on if it's a zombie apocalypse you know I'll be slower than you. (Sad attempt at humour).

I work, full time, support myself and the kiddo, and manage to stay afloat. So by those definitions I'm a functioning member of society.

Now, for the fun bit. I'm a cosplayer, LARPer, and historical reenactor.

With LARP I'm genuinely ok with being "plus sized" as I can just write fat characters.

With reenacting I mostly ok, as my impressions aren't the sorts that would be skinny so I manage..

BUT cosplay.... This is another thing...

I know plenty who say that cosplay has no size, no age, no colour, no gender, etc

But it does....

I couldn't cosplay as let's say Jessica Rabbit or Alice Angel (BATIM)...

Whenever I find a fandom that I want to cosplay I try to find a bigger character to cosplay as, not always who I want to, but who I think I physically look like....

I definitely stay away from "sexy", "hot", or even attractive characters...

Now you can tell me that is my problem and not a systematic of the cosplay community... But I've been made to feel bad even with cosplaying as Pomona Sprout (Harry Potter)...

I've also noticed I've avoided pictures in my cosplays, that one might be on me though....

I want to cosplay, I really do...

[elysabyth]

Woman, Girl or Lady

I’ve been curious lately about why society uses the term ‘Girl’ as the base identifier for Women when ‘Boy’ isn’t used in the same regards for Men.

Is it because ‘Woman’ is one too many syllables?

Is it because of a subconscious ingrained desire to diminish the importance of a young lady reaching adulthood?

That, no matter what her achievements might be, she’s still only ever seen as a 'Girl’ in people’s eyes and therefore not needing of recognition?

Or is it really just a non-issue?

Thoughts?

-Ren

[elysabyth]

How does one adult?

Specifically how does one make friends? There are some people I'd really like to get to know and become friends with.

The problem is I've been told over and over again how I talk to much, bore others, annoy people, etc.

I've been taught I'm not worth anyone's time. By not only the actions of those who were supposed to care about me, but by those I've attempted to befriend before.

I would give anything to be able to talk to them. In fact I've tried a little, but my own infectious insecurity comes back and I just stop trying to reach out or talk, fearing I'm annoying or bothering them.

I'm tired of being lonely. But I don't know how to talk to people without bothering them.

How does one adult?

[elysabyth]

[elysabyth]

My favourite D&d character (had the art commissioned) Schuyler Ellis

[elysabyth]

Will my eyes pick a colour please?

[elysabyth]

I got a few messages asking how, when I’m in cosplay, I can go from being a cute girl to a hot guy. I said it was in a posture. I thought I would illustrate this.