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engimono · 2 years ago

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@liedux/@casecmplx: reverse + [ tears ] uwu // sent from: ultimate affectionate gestures compilation

HOPE NEVER FELT SO FAR FROM REACH !

There was nothing left to do except wait until the digital countdown of the podium’s dashboard reached zero.

From the beginning of the investigation to the current voting period, every passing minute was yet another tribulation to endure and further fostered a formidable sense of fear – the likes of which he’d never known during the killing game. Nothing had prepared him for the stomach-turning sight in the hydraulic press or the crippling distress that overtook him when the subsequent body discovery announcement failed to summon one student in particular. The day prior had been filled with heartfelt promises and their idealistic ambitions beyond the academy’s walls, blissful murmurs and tender touches no longer making any effort to conceal their partiality for each other. Not once had there been any portent of the horror that awaited Naegi during the following morning, and that was what scared him most.

The existing evidence didn’t paint a clear picture of what happened and the truth only became even more enigmatic when the Exisal entered the courtroom. Hearing Momota’s voice first come out of the Exisal had been a shock to everyone in the courtroom but little had prepared him for the sound of Ouma’s voice as well. The reaction had been so visceral, his heartbeat racing so fast that he thought it might burst and mouth becoming so dry that he could only weakly speak his rival’s name. Every new development carried the risk of emotional whiplash, torn between his tenacious desire to unearth the truth and a selfish wish to see Ouma alive again. Shaking hands could only be steadied by occupying themselves on either side of his podium when Harukawa admitted that an attempt had been made on Ouma’s life, armed with poisoned arrows and unadulterated hostility. Overwhelming relief had washed over him when she went on to admit that she’d seen Ouma drink the antidote intended for Momota. The trial had been taxing to endure but with every expectant glance made in the Exisal’s direction, Naegi became emboldened by his inner resolve to see the case through to its end --- not unlike any of the other trials that had preceded it.

Rebuttals and rational counterarguments were made in Ouma’s name, cried out with vigour and assertiveness that had been repurposed from his earlier sense of dread. The sequence of events was stripped apart, diligently deconstructed and examined alongside the other members of the class. In spite of the ambiguity and multiple layers to the case’s complex narrative, however, the blurred motivations of the Exisal’s pilot gradually developed and gained greater clarity. Monokuma had no way of knowing the culprit’s identity with absolute certainty and it was with that revelation did Naegi finally understand the crux of the case ---- the same point in which the decision was made to pledge his own faith towards the culprit’s apparent plan. Regardless of Ouma’s role in the case, whether he was in the Exisal or not, all he knew was that the integrity of the impossible case had to be preserved and he had to be complicit in its proceedings.

No closing argument was made, not one that provided any additional lucidity for the others or Monokuma. The opportunity was squandered and when Naegi was called on for his final conclusions, a glowing testimony of Ouma was given that underscored the supreme leader’s importance and his admiration for the other’s strengths. He passionately spoke of how meaningful Ouma’s presence was, how much of an asset Ouma had been during past trials and how lucky he was to have known the supreme leader. There was no well-constructed rationale or any pertinent information about the case itself, only a long-winded monologue about his rival’s positive attributes before he was eventually written off as biased and unhelpful. Now, with the case at a stalemate, the voting time began and the seconds trickled away.

Several glances had been exchanged amongst his classmates but Naegi quietly shook his head at their pointed looks towards their podiums, a silent plea to dissuade them from voting and maintain the air of uncertainty that had been so carefully crafted. Nervousness was smothered beneath confidence, exhibited at the forefront to covey his conviction in hopes that the others would feel the same way. There was still a risk that he was wrong or Monokuma knew more than he was letting on. Although he was not one to depend on his appointed talent for any particular outcome, Naegi made an exception and privately begged for fortune’s good favour in one last bid to secure their success --- for the sake of his classmates and for Ouma’s sake. The final few seconds of the countdown was spent looking at the tinted glass of the Exisal, hardened stare becoming soft as they held on whomever was at the controls. A painful pang surged in his chest at the thought of the two possibilities before the voting period ran its course and concluded with the familiar tune. It was over.

There were no votes, and no verdict from Monokuma. The impossible case remained unsolved and the killing game had reached an impasse. Both Ouma and Momota had succeeded but the question remained as to whom was still alive to savour the victory. The Exisal’s pilot was safe and as the cockpit unlocked to open, Naegi took a hesitant step towards the machine’s imposing stature. As much as he tried to bridle his expectations, the final reveal was too overwhelming of a moment to calmly tolerate. Emotions ran high and Naegi’s reaction was just as strong as it’d been at the beginning of the trial, if not stronger.

❝ K-Kokichi ! ❞

Deaf and blind to all else, hurried footsteps closed the distance between them and arms wrapped tightly around Ouma’s form. The force of the hug pulled his counterpart against him without giving the other much say otherwise, nearly lifting Ouma off the ground as Naegi buried his face against violet-hued hair and surrendered himself to all that emotions that struck him in the wake of their reunion. After the extended absence and his mind frequently drifting to the worst possible scenario, it felt surreal to feel Ouma in his arms again but he still cherished it as a miracle. He didn’t want to let go. He feared that if he did, Ouma would disappear once more and leave him nothing but empty air. He couldn’t let that happen, not again.

Never again.

With a shaky breath did he pull back from their embrace to look at Ouma directly, tears of happiness flowing freely and dampening his cheeks as hazel eyes unwaveringly held onto their counterparts. No effort was made to wipe them clean from his face but there was no need to, not when his rival was willing to take care of them himself. Ouma leaned in to gently kiss them away and Naegi let him, his hands moving to frame the supreme leader’s face and tenderly thumb along the sides. Impatience conquered him in the end as Ouma’s head was maneuvered towards his, their lips fervently pressing together in a torrid kiss that channeled all the pent-up sentiments endured throughout the trial. New tears could be felt at the edges of his eyes but he paid them no mind. All he cared to know was Ouma --- the taste, the touch, sight, the sound, the smell, and the taste; in that moment, all he needed to feel was Ouma there with him and nothing else.

❝ I thought that I lost you. I couldn’t … I didn’t want to think about it. You should have told me ---- something, anything. I wanted to believe it was you in that Exisal. I wanted to believe it but I didn’t know. ❞

Words were clumsily spoken on the cusp of a breath, voiced only when lungs burned with the need for air and forced them apart. Ouma’s justification for not telling him about the plan was surely logical, likely founded on an entirely understandable form of reasoning but a spark of irrational anger alighted within him regardless. In their close proximity, eyes flickered over the other’s features to appreciate every detail and commit them all to memory. The close call had been nearly unbearable but as their foreheads pressed together and the growing lump in his throat was swallowed down, Naegi finally felt solace from the realization that Ouma was still with him a little longer.

❝ I’m glad your plan worked and I couldn’t be more thankful that it did but please .. don’t ever do something like that again, okay ? You can’t do that to me again. ❞

#liedux #casecmplx #｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ ANSWERED #verse tbt #long post for ts #((chapter 5 au where kodaka isn't a corward))

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engimono · 2 years ago

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liedux.:

━━ teeth grit in anger as he mentions that ; but despite the angered flush that comes to his face, he feels his blood freeze ; form slightly tensing up as makoto takes on such a frigid tone with him. he feels like a child, one who’s been caught doing something they shouldn’t. but – despite that spike in emotion for a moment, he refuses to tear his gaze up from the podium. he’s being tested – he can feel it. this is the final hurdle for them to get over — only this time, ouma isn’t sure he wants to finish.

━━ when makoto offers him appraisal for what he did – it feels as if a great weight has been placed on top of his chest. no longer was it a brave sacrifice on kaito’s end – he’d killed him. he’d killed him and gonta to try and stop this killing game – but all along he’d played right into makoto’s hands. a faint noise is strangled out before it can leave him, being forced down as quickly as it came. the shame of having put so much belief in himself – when all he’d done was give makoto the fascinating specimen to study – it made him feel sick. but still – he didn’t look. he refused to give makoto that much – he didn’t want to see that menacing glare in the eyes he trusted infinitely mere minutes prior.

━━ he listens to him discuss the motives he had for this. he can’t help but wonder in that moment if it was makoto’s luck that rendered him such a talented manipulator – perhaps he’d extended the same false love offered to kokichi to SOMEONE ELSE. he couldn’t help but mull it over – especially when makoto seemed to have experience in this field. he almost wanted to laugh about it, feeling that same rush of anxiety threaten to overwhelm him. he finally speaks up after such a long period of silence, him in this moment. but – what would it help achieve? all it’d do was satisfy makoto – he assumed. there was a blissful glee in his tone – one that held no care for anyone in the world. not even him. it stung – made all the kind words the lucky student had offered him – ones he held onto for support – be VEHEMENTLY REJECTED – thrown away like they were worthless.

━━ within a split second he can feel the other’s gazes fall on him – too many eyes focused on him in this moment – did they expect something from him? he felt like he could offer nothing to them in this moment. he felt vulnerable – alone and isolated during the one time he needed companionship the most – and that was such a twisted irony. he finally spoke after what felt like an infinite period of silence from someone as social as himself – the silence only broken once he felt like he had anything worth saying. and even then – it was barely anything special. “ people don’t like those who lead them astray – even if it’s to “help” them. “ after that, he went back to entirely focusing on the podium ever still – having not even bothered moving his gaze away from it. he knew now that this was apparently to help them all, but that was wrong. the idea of that alone was enough to baffle him – he was so confused that makoto thought it was actually anything more than some horrible, horrible joke.

━━ but when makoto mentions being in their situation before, he racked his brain to try and figure out what that could possibly mean. had this happened before? he didn’t understand how that could be possible – or what the possible motive for that one could’ve been. if makoto hadn’t been in charge of it – then who had been? kokichi had seen a lot of UGLINESS in the world – but something on this level left even him at his wits end. what would happen if the world was like this? if it was just a series of these horrible games, testing who’d live or die? it made it somehow harder to believe any future was lying out there for them now. all they were now were simple pawns in this killing game – awaiting their fates if they didn’t have enough hope to survive this game. even with his determination – having steeled himself against the horrors of the world – he felt nothing more than unbridled fear and anxiety in this moment – anger coursing hot through his veins on top of it all.

━━ he hated how that was worded – all of this was some horrible test. they had passed this test too – with “flying colors”. he didn’t like the idea of finishing – since it was clearly what makoto wanted. so, instead of thinking about his freedom – he was thinking about an alternative way to get out of this without giving makoto what he wanted. “ for now, right? “ he asked, quietly, looking at himiko from the side, watching as her eyes directed towards makoto. he refused to follow her gaze – silently taking her fear and misery in with despair and empathy. “ we’re humanity’s new hope – if we get out. “ he corrected him as if it was natural, already thinking about whether or not getting out would be worth it – if not only in a sickeningly spiteful way. .

LONG REIGN HIS DISCIPLES OF HOPE & MAY THEY DELIVER EVERYONE FROM DESPAIR !

to lead others towards a certain outcome may not have been a choice that was popular but it was necessary, regardless of whether or not it gained the favour of those that were recipients to his guidance. had naegi not felt such euphoria and exhilaration towards the killing game’s final battle between the mastermind and the participants, eyes would have rolled at ouma’s criticism but his high spirits snuffed out the urge and disregarded the other’s comment as an emotional response. ouma wasn’t cognizant of the killing game’s overarching benefit but with time, maybe the supreme leader would be able to liberate himself from the narrow viewpoint and appreciate the gift of HOPE that had been bestowed to them all. one day, they would all understand how much effort had been invested towards their futures; one day, they’d understand the extent of the ultimate lucky student’s sacrifice and come to terms with the necessity of the killing game ---- some would learn sooner than others, but naegi had long since accepted the fact. to assume the role of the mastermind was always going to be a thankless job.

not to mention, since his pivotal confrontation with junko enoshima at hope’s peak academy, he’d always considered himself to be living on borrowed time anyway.

regardless of ouma’s current stance on his motives, however, his rival’s comportment struck him as a little odd. the absence of eye contact, notwithstanding, the request for reiteration wasn’t a perfect reflection of what had just been said and the error brought naegi’s head to angle inquiringly. for as long as they’d known each other, ouma wasn’t one to overlook pertinent details or blatantly ignore opportunities for elucidation. given the pandemonium incited by the epiphany, however, there was a slim chance that the other had simply misheard him and there were no qualms to be had with honest mistakes. misunderstandings could be corrected and in spite of his newly revealed identity, insistently did he remain ever willing to help out his beloved counterpart in any way he could.

❝ ‘ when ’ you get out, actually ---- it’s an important distinction. sorry, maybe i didn’t make that clear. my mistake. ❞

no attempt was made to hide the piercing look of narrowed eyes or blunt the clipped edge to his words, vexed by the supreme leader’s decision to indirectly speak to him without the courtesy of eye contact; as implausible as it was, himiko yumeno was apparently more deserving of the honour than he was. a deep breath was taken in to better manage his frustration, ignoring the growing soreness of his fingers as they curled hard against the edges of his podium. with the unravelling of the killing game and the reveal of the mastermind, they didn’t have the luxury of time to entertain grudges; ouma should have realized that and the fact that he remained committed to his childish cause only served to disconcert naegi further. all he could do was move the conversation forward as per the final trial’s scripted structure and keep everyone focused on their next steps, with or without ouma’s eyes on him.

❝ speaking of which, i was thinking about how this trial is more of a formality than anything so i’ve got an idea –-- hear me out. ❞ a beat of silence passed for dramatic effect, quickly scanning the room to ensure that the majority of the class’ interest was captured with the pending proposal; to ask for everyone’s attention was arguably still too steep of a demand. ❝ see, i was thinking that maybe we could just skip over the rest of the trial and save everyone the trouble. all of you already know who i am so there’s really nothing left to debate, right ? we don’t have to waste time with rebuttals or going head-to-head with each other until we’re blue in the face. we can just go ahead and cut straight to the chase. all you need to do is take care of one last thing and you’re free to leave this school behind. the sooner you do, the sooner you can move on with the rest of your lives --- everybody wins. ❞

( WHY WON’T YOU LOOK AT ME ? WHY WON’T YOU LOOK AT ME ? WHY WON’T YOU LOOK AT ME ? )

teeth gritted hard behind the curve of his smile, closed lips concealing the indignation that threatened to leak through the cracks of his cheery veneer. no small amount of willpower was mustered to veil his aggravation for ouma’s audacity during the trial but as his tongue swept over his lips, naegi’s focus was forcibly ripped away from the supreme leader to deliver the final instructions for those who were willing to lend him their attention. there wouldn’t be a final battle waged between good and evil, no climactic war between despair and hope. the mastermind’s fate had already been decided but as per the rules, certain procedures had to be abided by for consistency; fortunately for the remaining survivors, the last task was remarkably straightforward and all too familiar.

❝ vote me out. no tricks, no risk of a wrong answer ----- just unanimously vote for me like you would with any other culprit, it’s that simple. think of it as my way of saying thank you for playing my game. i couldn’t have done this without you and as much as i wish that i could see what you’re going to do with newfound freedom, i know that it’s not my place to be a part of it. all of you are going to bring so much hope to the world and i couldn’t be happier for you. ❞

pride swelled in his voice, not unlike a true closing ceremony as hazel eyes shone with a myriad of sentiments --– heartache for the inevitable end, overwhelming joy for the future, and the satisfaction of a job well done. one last attempt was made to meet ouma’s eye but expectations had long since dwindled away. in spite of his personal incredulity towards his luck, naegi hoped that it would be kind enough to arrange one last look between him and ouma in his final moments ----- a lacklustre farewell, but it would be categorically better than none at all.

❝ so, without further ado, let’s wrap this up. give me everything you’ve got. cast your votes, and let’s finish this together. ❞

#liedux #｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ V; vii. MASTERMIND OF MISFORTUNE #long post for ts #((let's get ready to ruuuuuuumble))

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