escapingthementaltarpit - Tumblr blog

[escapingthementaltarpit]

I’m bad at keeping up with online accounts, but journaling doesn’t help me either because nobody can hold me accountable for using it. Sorry for the lack of posts here. Maybe I’ll start up again... but knowing me that is unlikely

[escapingthementaltarpit]

It feels good to know I am helping others on Kokobot, and through my own replies I am learning how to be kinder to myself. My degree is in human services, I have literally been trained to counsel other people, but the traditional workplace setting isn’t for me, so it’s nice knowing my education is getting some use.

[escapingthementaltarpit]

Pack your luggage

I want to take you 

Everywhere and anywhere.

I want to take you 

to the most beautiful waterfalls

or the most gruesome tar pits.

I want to experience it all

with you by my side.

-unknown-

[escapingthementaltarpit]

This is your daily reminder to not be ashamed of making your life easy for yourself.

Cut your food into small pieces, make the font size 30 on your e book, use straws to drink, get a pen that’s comfortable to hold, take more naps, walk slowly, eat another cookie, buy velcro shoes, re-watch the part you couldn’t understand the first time, write things on your hands so you don’t forget it… whatever you want and/or need

Don’t let anyone tell you how you should be doing things. We don’t need to prove each other anything

[escapingthementaltarpit]

We are all born with the same worth, live with the same worth, and die with the same worth. Your worth does not falter, no matter your experiences. Sometimes I forget I am worthy, but I know that the people I surround myself with remember for me. If you have forgotten, I will remember for you.

[escapingthementaltarpit]

[escapingthementaltarpit]

allow yourself to accept still having lousy days in the midst of progress and recovery. i promise they won’t ruin it.

[escapingthementaltarpit]

Just because no one else can heal or do your inner work for you, doesn't mean you can, should, or need to do it alone

Lisa Olivera

[escapingthementaltarpit]

An Introduction to My Mental Tar Pit

Tar Pit: a hollow in which natural tar oozes out of the ground and accumulates, in particular one in which the bones of prehistoric animals trapped in the tar have been preserved.

I am trapped in a mental tar pit; I have been for years if I’m being honest. The bones of my past experiences are perfectly preserved within the inner workings of my brain. 

Tar pits are commonly excavated to find the fossils hidden within, but my mental tar pit is an excavation I wish I didn’t have to be a part of. See, I placed many of these bones, these memories, in my tar pit all on my own. And as they’ve decayed within my memory vault, it’s left a mess that I simply don’t want to clean. I don’t even know where to start cleaning. I don’t know what I’ll find or where I’ll find it. 

The problem is that this mess absolutely needs to be cleaned. It needs to be carefully excavated. Not only are these memories of mine trapped within the sticky mental tar, but I am trapped somewhere in there too. 

Throughout my life, I’ve left too many memories to try and comprehend at a later time for whatever reason. I don’t know when I got lost within the mess, but I know I have been lost for at least a few years now. 

Lately, the memories in this tar pit have been bubbling to the surface, slowly revealing themselves to me. I won’t lie, I’ve thrown some of it back in the pit when I’m too overwhelmed to face the reality, but I feel like It might be time to sift through what I can. Time to throw on a hazmat suit, take out my shovel, and just dig through the mess to find myself within. 

This blog is my way to process what comes up. It is a way for followers to hold me accountable. It is a way for followers to not feel so alone, and to share what they find in their mental tar pits as well. 

So hello, welcome to my mental tar pit. It is ugly, it is messy, it is the product of me. I look forward to giving you a more detailed tour as we journey through it’s depths.

[escapingthementaltarpit]

Nothing is more soothing than the sound of my cats purring as I lay in bed at night.