esthersarahhh

[esthersarahhh]

characters; Annie Leonhart x fem!reader

summary; Annie and reader become friends, and maybe more?

wordcount; 1174

content warning; some mean comments directed towards reader

notes; sorry for the excruciating slow updates :(

-

Joining the cadets had always been your dream, much against your parents wishes. So when the day finally came, you signed up immediately.

Now it’s been a few months since you’ve joined and things are not at all like you’d imagined it. Sure, you hadn’t thought it to be sunshine and rainbows but also not like this.

You were alone. Lonely. You hadn’t made a connection with anyone. You had tried countless times to talk to people, to try and be their friend, but they always hurried away before you could talk to them. Or they made up excuses. You had heard it all before.

“ I need to go the bathroom. “

“ My friend needs me. “

“ I forgot something back in my room “

They always excluded you from things.

“ There’s not enough seats for you Y/n. “

“ We’re already a group, you can’t join. “

Or when you finally did get with people, even if you were just walking behind them, they’d just whisper things about you until you left.

“ Ugh does she have to be with us? “

“ Does she always look like that? “

“ Why is she walking with us? Does she think were friends? “

After a while, you just stopped trying. You didn’t want to leave the cadets entirely, because it would only give them satisfaction. You learned to avoid them. You went to the lunchroom when it empty but went to bed earlier than everyone else to avoid people and their mean comments. You were just so confused. What had you done to deserve being treated this way?

-

It was a day like any other. You were sitting in the lunchroom, in the most far-away corner. You were observing the other people around you. Their looks, movement, body language and their smiles. It seemed so easy for them to talk to each other. How did some of them even become friends in the first place you wonder. Ymir is so different from Christa and yet they're friends. Same goes for Reiner and Bertholdt, you didn't know any of them but they seemed so different from each other.

You were so lost in your thoughts, you didn't notice a blonde haired girl standing in front of you. You had seen her around, but didn't know her name.

'' Can i sit here? '' she asks. Why would she want to sit next to you? You looked around the hall. Were there no other places for her to sit and that's why she had to come to you? As you looked around you saw there were more than enough other places for her, so then she must've wanted to sit with you? But why? Maybe her friends told her to? Maybe she's planning to humiliate y-

The sound of someone clearing their throat interups your thinking. She was still standing in front of you, with an even more annoyed expression on her face than before.

'' Sorry! '' You quickly apologized. '' Please do sit down! '' She didnt say another word for the entire time you were eating together, and neither did you. It didn't seem like she had any other friends waiting for her at some other table either.

Eventually you had both finished eating and she stood up and started making her way outside. '' Wait! '' you shouted after her. She turned around to face you. '' I.. um I didn't get your name. ''

She looked at you with her stonecold blue eyes. '' Annie. '' She said before walking away.

-

It had became a common thing since then. The two of you just sitting together at lunch, usually in silence but sometimes you had light conversation, about nothing in particular.

Today you did the same as everyday. You grabbed your food and made your way over to the table you always sat at, the table in the most faraway corner of the room.

You sat down and waited for Annie. When you saw her walk in your face instantly lit up. You watched her grab her lunch and expected her to come to your table, but instead your happy expression fell as you saw her sit down with the same girls that made those comments about you all those weeks ago.

She knew how mean they had been to you, you had told her, so then why was she there with them and not with you? You couldn’t look at her any longer, had she not thought the two of you were friends? Maybe she just pitied you all along, well you didn’t need pity. Maybe it was better this way. But whatever you said to yourself to try and justify her actions, it still hurt.

-

It had only been a week since Annie stopped sitting with you at lunch, but it felt like an eternity. You missed her, even though she never talked much it always felt like the two of you had a mutual understanding about each other. As silly as it sounds you even started developing some romantic feelings for her, though you knew she wouldn’t possibly return them.

You suddenly thought about something your father often would tell you.

“ Nothing in the world changes on its own. If you do not like how something is in the world, change it. “

You didn’t like your current situation, so you had to change it. Just like your father had always told you.

So after gathering all of your courage, you stood up with your food and made your way over to Annie’s table. The table with the mean girls. You sat down next to Annie, not asking if they wanted you to sit there or not. You started eating while the girls around you stared in disbelief. With your mouth full of food, you looked up and you met their judgemental eyes.

“ What? “ you mumbled, unable to speak normally cause of the food in your mouth.

You heard a stifled laugh next to you. You smiled as you saw that it was Annie who was holding her laughter in. You started giggling, and soon both of you erupted into laughter.

The girls stood up and walked away, offended. You and Annie exchanged looks and started laughing again, causing the mean girls to look at the two of you before walking away again.

When the laughter died down, you and Annie continued eating in silent until you asked

“ Why did you sit with them in the first place? “

“ I..I um i get attached to easy. “ She said.

“ If you want me to back off I can! W-we can only eat lunch together once a week if that works better for you? O-or we can- “

You were cut off by Annie’s lips meeting yours. The kiss was sweet and her lips were soft. You didn’t want this moment to end.

Annie didn’t say anything after, she just smiled. That was all the answer you needed.

[esthersarahhh]

characters; whoever you want! x gn!reader

summary; reader gets scared during a thunderstorm and [?] is there to help

word count; 312 ik it’s short don’t kill me over it

content warning; talk about thunderstorms

notes; im super sorry about the excruciating slow updates 😞 life is kicking my behind (also [?] means insert the character u want 👍)

_

Normally you could fall asleep the second you fell into bed, especially after a full day of Commandant Shadis’s training. But thunderstorms had always freaked you out, and as much as you’d love to sleep right now, the commotion outside was making it extremely difficult to even close your eyes.

You were losing any hope for sleeping this night, though you had always been closer to [?] than anyone else of the 104. Maybe he/she knows a way to help?

You made your way out of bed as quietly as possible and tip toed your way to the dorm [?] is in. You were soaked by the time you made it to the dorm’s front door. You opened the door, luckily it was unlocked, and sneaked over to [?]’s bed.

“ [?]? “ you whispered.

Nothing. You shook her/his shoulder lightly and called their name again. This time you were met with some light murmuring. She/he opened her/his eyes, adjusting to see whoever it is who woke them up at this hour.

“ Y/n!? “ she/he whisper-shouted. “ What the hell are you doing here? It’s like midnight. “

“ I’m sorry for waking you but I can’t sleep because of the storm outside. “

“ …right and what would you like me to do about it? “ She/he asks, with a shit-eating grin on her/his lips.

“ I don’t know! I’ll take anything at this point. “

[?] lifted the blanket and made space for you to lie down. “ The only idea I have is that I keep you company for the rest of the night. “

Too tired to say anything back, you just smiled at her/him and laid down. It was a bit stiff and awkward at first but as the minutes went by you started to warm up to each others touch.

You were out in minutes.

[esthersarahhh]

characters; Marco Bodt x gn!reader, past Jean Kirstein x gn!reader

summary; After Jean’s insensitive rejection of Y/n’s feelings, he starts wondering if he made the wrong choice.

word count; 1,4k (1463)

content warning; my constant switching between you and i 😿

notes; i am SO SO sorry for taking so long with updating 😭 school is really stressing me out!! Do you guys want a part 3? If yes, should it be Marco x reader, Jean x reader, both or something entirely else?

Also important! this is a part 2! so i recommend reading the first part before reading this one. you can find part 1 here

———————————————————————

After your not-so-successful confession to Jean, you’ve pretty much avoided him. It wasn’t all too hard the first few weeks, and since he was still head over heels about Mikasa, i think he hardly noticed.

You’ve spent more time with the other cadets and made good friends with them. You’ve become closer to Marco than ever before. You also still shared the same bed together with Marco a lot. Not necessarily in a romantic way but not entirely un-romantic either.

Most boys in the dorm didn’t mind you there, in-fact they liked your presence, and luckily Commandant Shadis didn’t know because if he did God knows how many laps he’d have you run.

Tonight was a night like every other. As you were walking to the boy dorm you noticed that Jean was walking before you. You hadn't talked to him since the whole '' confession '' thing, and you didn't feel like talking to him now. You just kept walking behind him, hoping he wouldn't hear you. He didn't and he went inside the dorm. The same dorm you were going to.

' Why am I suddenly caring if Jean is there or not? He's been in there while I was as well countless times before. ' You thought to yourself. Did you still miss him? Were you only so close with Marco to drive out any leftover feelings you had for Jean?

No. You couldn't think like that. What would Marco say? What would anyone say for that matter. All of your other friends whom you had told the story to said the same thing Marco said. That Jean is stupid and that you shouldn't try to even befriend him again.

But Jean was lonely too. After what he did both Marco and I had stopped talking to him. Me, because I obviously didn't want to talk to him, and Marco because he wanted to focus on me. Jean didn't have any friends exept for us, and seeing him alone in the lunch barracks broke my heart, one piece at a time.

You shaked off the thought you had, turned heel, and went back to your own dorm. You'd have to apologize to Marco later for not showing up like you promised.

_

You apologogized next morning, as you were eating breakfast in the barracks. Marco said he understood, that even though you hadn't thought about Jean for a while, that doesn't mean you never had feelings for him in the first place.

'' I suppose you're right. '' You said, taking another bite of food.

'' I always am. '' Marco replied which made you snort. Your eyes wandered the hall. You saw Mikasa, talking to Eren and Armin. You saw Sasha, stuffing her mouth with more food than she could chew, and Connie laughing at her. Annie, Bertholdt and Reiner were sitting with Mina, Thomas and Daz just talking and laughing together.

Jean was sitting alone in the fathest end of the hall. His food laid untouched on his plate as he just stared at the table before him. You suddenly felt a deep pit in your stomach as you watched him. He looked so alone. You turned to Marco, only to see him talking to Nac next to us. You figured he wouldn't notice if you slipped out for a minute.

So you did just that. You stood up and walked over to Jean's table. As you approached he looked up from his food and looked at you. You stood there, fidgeting with your fingers as you tried to think of what to say.

'' ...You looked alone so I thought I'd ask you to come sit at our table- '' You said but were cut of as he said '' I'm fine! You don't have to pretend to care about me. ''

Half of you wanted to scream at him and make a scene, the other half wanted to be polite to him. The polite half won. '' Well umm.. the offer is open. '' You said and as you were about to turn around and walk back, you turned around again. '' ..Please. '' You looked at him and he looked back at you. He picked up his plate and you frowned in defeat. He was leaving. You closed your eyes and let out a deep sigh. As you opened your eyes again Jean was standing infront of you with a confused look on his face. Then he started grinning.

'' Are you going to stand there with your eyes closed or are we going to sit over there? '' He said, still grinning. You let out a small chuckle and walked with him over to where you were previously sitting. Marco looked at you and Jean, and then put a welcoming smile on his face.

_

You and Jean were neutral after that. Well, you wouldn't call it neutral. You just said hi to each other when walking past each other, not much more than that. You did however have a conversation with Marco about him.

It was a few nights ago, you were both on the porch just looking at the stars when Marco suddenly said '' Why are you talking to him again? '' it sounded more like a statement than a question and he sounded the slightest bit jealous.

'' To who? Jean? '' You questioned, just to make sure. He nodded in response. '' Well he looked alone and it made me think of before i joined the cadets. I was also alone and no one would talk to me. The only company I had was my family. I didn't want Jean to feel the same lonelyness I did. ''

It was quiet after that. You looked at Marco but he looked away. You finally broke the silence by saying '' Are you mad at me? For talking to him again? '' He still wasn't looking at you but he shook his head no.

'' Then why aren't you saying anything..? '' You ask again. Marco turned his head to face you. He had tears in his eyes. You almost broke down right then and there. Seeing Marco cry was like the world was on fire. You leaned into him and put your head on his shoulder, whilst wrapping your arm around him. He took a few deep breaths and then said '' Do you still like him. '' He sounded like he was about to break out into sobs again.

'' No! Not at all. I.. I like someone else. '' His eyes glistened from the tears. You didn't want to say right out that it was him you liked, though it was pretty obvious that he liked you too. You looked into his eyes and he looked at you, then he leant in and kissed you. You kissed back but it didn't last as long as you would've liked. As you pulled apart you felt the presence of someone behind you.

Marco felt that feeling too and you both turned around, only to be met with Jean. You couldn't quite figure out what Jean was feeling from the expression on his face, but from the fact that he was holding flowers and a handwritten letter, you could tell it wasn't good.

'' Congrats. '' Jean said, unimpressed. He dropped the flowers and the letter, and turned around. He walked away. Not to the dorms, but to be somewhere alone. You picked up the letter and gave the flowers to Marco, so he could hold them while you read the letter.

'' Hi Darling Dearest Dear Y/n. I wanted to apologize for my behavior. I wanted to say this to you in person but Im afraid of what you will say so I decided to write this instead. I haven't been fair to you.

You liked me while I barely talked to you because I was so obsessed over Mikasa. I regret everday that I ignored you when you wanted to talk to me that day. You were still nice to me even after what I did. You invited me to sit with you and even though it might not seem like a grand gesture, it meant a lot to me. Im not asking you to forgive me, I just want you to know how sorry I am. Hopefully we can still be friends, and I would do anything for you to give me a second chance.

-Jean ''

You gave the letter to Marco and let him read it as well. After he read it you said '' I um.. need some time to think about this. Sorry I'll see you tomorrow. '' You mumbled as you walked away, back to the girl dorm.

What do you do now?

[esthersarahhh]

characters; Jean Kirstein x gn!reader

summary; reader has a crush on Jean but he only seems to have eye for a certain black haired girl.

word count; 1k (1008)

content warning; no happy ending?, takes place in the early days of the 104 cadet corps, slight marco x reader?? (if you squint)

notes; this is my first time writing a post on my phone this feels very weird, if you have any tips or anything i can improve let me know! as well as requests, if u have a request please ask! (i also have a annie x reader fic on my mind that i’ll put into words soon enough so)

_________________________________________

You were eating when Jean first met Mikasa. As you were sitting with Marco and Jean, there was a conversation going on by the table next to us. Apperently it's that guy that says he wants to kill all the titans, and quite a few people have gathered around to listen to him. You don't pay any attention, you have other things on your mind.

Your friend, Jean, you've had a crush on him since the day you joined, and luckily the two of you became fast friends along with Marco. But friends wasnt enough. You wanted to hold his hand as well as hold his face while-

Jean stood up so you looked what was happening. He was talking to Eren, and a few seconds later they shook hands, apologizing to each other for something. As Eren left, a beautiful black haired girl followed him. Your face dropped when you saw Jean's expression when he saw her. His eyes followed her with every step she took, something he never did when it came to you.

'' Hey there! '' he said to her. As she turned around you could see the visable blush on his face. '' Uh it's just that i've never seen you around so.. '' She didn't say anything back.

'' S-sorry.. Your black hair is really gorgeous. ''

'' Thanks. '' She simply says and walks away.

Jean stands shook a minute and then runs out the door. You couldn't bear to see anymore so you focused back on your food. From the corner of your eye you could see Marco giving you a sympathetic look, but you knew that if you looked up to face him, he would see your tears and you couldn't afford to look weak.

_

That was 2 months ago. Even after that interaction, and the countless times Jean has talked about Mikasa to you, your crush on him never faltered.

Your relationship with Marco got stronger though, seeing as you could talk to him about Jean. You could talk to Marco whenever and he gave really good advice too.

But today you felt good. You had had a few quite romantic interactions with Jean in these past few days, so you decided it might've been time to confess. And seeing as titans are still a threat, better late than never right? You decided to talk to him after lunch, without everyone around. You told Marco your plan to confess beforehand, just so he'd know and he was supportive and hoping the best.

When everyone started packing up and leaving the lunch room, you tapped Jean on his shoulder.

'' Hey, can i talk to you? Alone? '' you said, your heart beating faster with each word. Jean didn't seem as happy as you though. He didn't even look you in the eye. He looked behind you, as if he was looking for someone else.

'' Mhmm '' He hummed, still not looking at you. You're not even sure if he heard what you said. You sat back down and started to think of the exact words you were going to say. Soon the lunch room was empty exept for you and Jean.

'' So..why i wanted to talk to you was- '' you started but were cut off by Jean himself.

'' Can you wrap it up..please? I need to find Mikasa to ask her something. '' His eyes seemed to lit up and his cheeks turned the slighest bit red when he mentioned Mikasa. You felt a deep pit in your stomach. You had thought his crush on her had faded because she never showed any interest towards him.

You opened your mouth to answer but found yourself with a lump in your throat, unable to talk. The tears started welling up in your eyes and you couldn't bear it any longer. You stood up and left without a word, leaving Jean alone. You walked all the way to the boy dorms where Marco lived. You knocked and awaited an answer. As soon as the door opened you walked right in with your head down, to Marco's bed.

Marco was sitting in his bed, reading something, but stopped as soon as he saw you. He scooted over, making place for you to sit. As you sat down you broke down in sobs, and he put his arm around you. You leant into his chest and let it all out. You couldn't care less if all of the boys in this dorm were looking at you right now, which they probably were.

After you calmed down a bit, you told Marco what'd happened. He said Jean was a fool for not listening, wether he liked you back or not it was straight out rude to ignore you like that. You and him stayed in each others arms for a while longer until you spoke up.

'' I should probably go back to my dorm now.. '' you said, tho you didn't want to leave. It was nice being with Marco, he made you feel safe. '' You could stay here if you'd like. If Commandant Shadis found you outside at this hour there is no telling what he'll punish you with. ''

'' Are you sure? I don't want the others to think anything weird. '' You said. Sure you wanted to stay here but what if the other guys would start rumors?

'' They wont say anything. Now come on. '' He made place for you on the bed. Luckily the bed was big enough for two people, so you had enough space. You laid down next to him, but facing the wall. You doubt you'll get much sleep considering you still had many tears left to let out, and the fact that you have to face Jean sooner or later didn't make your thoughts any lighter. You felt a hand on your shoulder. '' Y/n, stop thinking about him and close your eyes. ''

You did as Marco said, and moments later you fell asleep.

[esthersarahhh]

characters; Reiner Braun x gn!reader

summary; Reiner is insecure and afraid it will affect his relationship with reader.

word count; 480

content warning; insecure reiner :(

notes; hi again! i have fake nails on so writing this feels weird.. anyways, once again i'd love to hear your thoughts and if you have any tips or anything i can improve let me know!

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I fell down on the bed after another exhausting day of training warrior candidates. Reiner was already in bed. I snuggled up to him, placing my head on his bare chest and letting out a big sigh. I had noticed that throughout the day, Reiner had been a bit distant and you couldn't help but worry.

'' Don't cuddle.. me '' I moved away from him as he asks, looking at him with confusion. '' Just...please, not right now... ''

Immediatly filled with more worry than before, I reach out to him to hold his hand, but he just moves his hand away. '' Reiner... please talk to me. What's wrong baby? '' Now sitting up, Reiner looked down at you, you looked back into his eyes. Your eyes were filled with worry, something way different than his lifeless and dark ones.

'' Why did you pick...me? I don't deserve you..'' He whispers to you. You just shake your head softly. '' I didn't pick you sweetheart, we both belong to each other. I wouldn't trade you for the world. What makes you say that? '' you smile softly and Reiners eyes begin to oh so slightly light up. You brought your hands up to his cheeks and he flinched, but slowly started to warm up to your touch. You felt his warm tears drop on your hands and you looked up to him again.

'' I just...I gained some weight and I don't understand..how you can love me.. After everything, I told you what I did, why do you stay..? '' He asked and you just lean your head into his chest, listening to his beating heart.

His teeth grit and he grabbed your shoulders, pushing you, once again, away from him. The tears kept pouring from his eyes and you could feel your own eyes start to water. His head dropped into your chest as he cried. You moved your hands to bring his head up so that he was looking at you. With tears in your eyes you gave him the answer.

'' Because I love you, Reiner Braun. I love you so much to the point I can barely form the words to say how much I love you. And besides, you wouldn't stop loving me if I gained some weight, right? ''

'' No of course not, but- '' He started.

'' No buts. You're beautiful, end of story. Now how about we get some sleep? ''

'' ...yeah, '' he breathed out. I could hear that he still wasn't fully convinced of my words, so I'll have to reassure him everyday, wether he wants to or not. For the second time this night, I lay my head on his chest and snake my arms around him.

'' I will never ever leave you. I promise '' You say while giving him a quick kiss.

[esthersarahhh]

characters; Levi Ackerman, gn!reader

summary; Levi disappears sometimes at night and reader confronts him about it

word count; 512

notes; HIII first time writing on tumblr yippiiee! I'd love to hear your thoughts and if you have any tips or anything i can improve let me know!

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Levi and I both know we can tell eachother anything, but there are certain things Levi keeps to himself. I know bits and pieces about his past, but not the full story. I never asked about it though, I didn't need to. But it's nights like tonight, where I'd wish I'd known what'd happened, so that I can help him, comfort him in some way.

Tonight is no different from any of the other nights. Sometimes I wake up because Levi keeps tossing and turning in his sleep, sometimes i wake up because he jolts wide awake in the middle of the night. Other times, he's just gone. Sometimes he's out on the balcony, just getting some air, but there are times where he's just...gone. I don't know where he goes but he always returns at sunrise.

Most of the time I don't mention it, so that he doesn't get yet another thing added to his pile of worry. But this time, when he doesn't return until evening, I know I have to ask. I hear the door to our shared room open. I don't look up from what im doing.

'' Where were you? '' I ask.

He doesn't answer. Instead he takes off his shoes and gear.

'' I know it's not easy dealing with everything you've been through Levi, but you can't just sneak off in the middle of the night like that. '' I say, turning around to face him.

'' I know. '' He simply says.

'' When are you going to tell me about it? '' I say, sitting next to him on the couch. '' I just want to help you, and understand you better. ''

I hear him release a big sigh. I immediately feel bad for saying that to him.

'' Im sorry, I shouldn't push you into saying anything. '' I apologize. If he doesn't want to tell me, he doesn't want to tell me. In the end, it's his choice. He knows this. He knows Im only trying to help, but he also knows he doesn't have to say anything if he doesn't want to.

'' I'll tell you. '' he says. And he does. He tells me everything, from underground and Isabel and Furlan, to Kenny, to the scouts and all his comrades. I know he isn't going to say this out loud, but he's just scared of losing me. He's lost too much already. I don't think anything i'll say will make it better, I know no words can fix what he's gone through, so instead im scooting closer to him and placing my arms around him, aswell as my head his shoulder.

I whisper a quiet '' I'll never leave you. '' against his neck. After a few moments of sitting like this, I can hear his heart starts beating at a slower pace. He's fast asleep. God knows he deserves it. I grab a nearby blanket and wrap it around us. I give him a quick kiss on the cheek and lay down. '' Goodnight love. ''