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Happy disabled pride month to the undiagnosed. To those with no idea what it could be. To those who are pretty sure they know, but can't be certain yet. To those whose doctors are trying their best, and to those whose doctors aren't. To those with test results, and those without. To those whose prognosis isn't looking good. To those scared by the course of their symptoms, and with no idea what's going to happen next. Living undiagnosed is hard, and I wish you all luck.
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pet peeve: in media™ when the driver of the car is talking to a passenger and makes repeated and/or prolonged eye contact
KEEP YOUR EYES ON THE FUCKING ROAD
#This One's For You (fic tag)#only one of us in this piece of shit can actually die and not get back up again so. (no)
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"Uhm actually [character] would never do that!☝️🤓"
my tongue has been in his mouth I know him better than the author does.
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hey - is it actually harmful or do you just not like it?
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Painting some pumpkins this sunday because there's a breeze outside so you know what that means 🎃🎃🎃
#IT HAS FELT LIKE FALL OFF AND ON FOR THE LAST WEEK AND I AM SO READY. FUCK THE HEAT. FUCK THE SUN. LET'S FUCKIN GOO#I'm also committed to writing at least one Halloween Special for my fics. So. >kazoo toot<
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the likelihood of remmick being filí (i think.. that's how you spell it..) is KILLING me because it's literally top dog tragedy
being turned most probably against his will, the lack of humanity immediately severing any ancestral communication he had via music, and then it's that heavy loneliness that he's been feeling year after year, nobody is going to stick around with him forever unless he turns them, and that doesn't usually end well anyway because he's probably had hivemind after hivemind over the centuries and he's still introduced all alone on the screen, without anyone around, because who is there to even stay near?
it makes me sad, because he obviously yearns for the connection and gift he once had, but because he misses it and wants it back so desperately, he fails to understand that turning sammie would just be a repeat of his own trauma. he's become what made him so lonely in the first place
sammie would lose his gift, and remmick's conquest would've ultimately been for nothing, it was always going to be for nothing
bro literally trips over his own greed and longing and messes up 50-60 peoples' lives, not to mention their community good lord
in the end he was better off dying anyway, because it never would've worked out. he would be playing a losing game, he WAS playing a losing game, dude has been losing since he lost his gift and humanity, not to mention he probably only had memories of being colonized after his ability was gone. what would the use be anyway
#filidh. and YEAH#also....comes back to the idea that once you absorb someone into you....the person that is there existing afterward is not the same you.#and like yes you can say that in general always all the time for everyone. but literally absorbing someone's memories....their feelings#their thoughts their physical sensations.....all but sharing a body with everyone. becoming connected in a literal sense.--#spiritually physically mentally emotionally. and to still. after all that. after /feeling/ love joy connection community and freedom...#to still be the person left to clean up when the party's over (metaphorically speaking)#everyone rags on him. He is a dork it is an open door I get it. but his experiences...#as someone w mental illness I already know what it's like to not feel like yourself. To not be a version of yourself you recognize.#but for him....the very act of attempting to connect with someone fundamentally fractures and destroys what of him there was before....#/DOES/ he remember his life before turning? (It WAS a very very long time ago...) and he IS human in essence. Memories are already traitors#They get written over and written over until they're not the thing anymore just the simulacrum. And I can't imagine how it must feel for hi#to know that every person he loves. no matter how intensely. even if he brings them into his fold. he can still lose them.#he probably hardly remembers his father's lands. his parents. what of his wife? whom we argue that he did all of this for?#I extend a lot of sympathy -- and empathy -- to him because I recognize what I see. His is not failure to know when to take a picture.--#--for him true preservation does not exist at all. And that is the foundational essence of his tragedy.#Even when he is at his most monstrous he is never FULLY a monster. He is always a man. He began as a man.#He was changed in a literal supernatural sense but also -- time. life. violence. circumstances /change/ you. as it changed him.
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Watching Sinners video essays where the creator did little to no research on Irish history beforehand is just. Oh my god please you're missing SO MUCH
#see my previous post where I fucking scream about Remmick's victimhood being misunderstood as him being a demon#< --- YEAH#feeling morally superior does not excuse you from doing a /fraction/ of the research Ryan Coogler and his plethora of consultants put in#if you're going to attempt to be media literate fucking COMMIT TO IT. NONE OF THIS 'I think Emily Dickenson was a lesbian' John Mulaney shi#I don't give a FUCK what you think cite me a BOOK give me PROOF and link it back to the exact timestamp you drew the conclusion from--#--or get the fuck off my porch!
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Sinners dir. Ryan Coogler | 2025
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5 fav films – tagged by @taintandviolent! thank you for the tag, my love!
List 5 of your favorite films in a poll and have people vote for their favorite!
npt: @faestunna, @draconicks, @fuckoffbard, @shutupwyl, @iceemochaa, @iamyourwayout and anyone else who wants to do this! <3
#one of these things is not like the others lmfao#strig / eNVy irl#I want your stories. I want your songs. And you gon' have mine (tag games)
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I now have 10 full pages of notes for my Joan & Bert deep dive analysis, send me good vibes so my brain actually lets me write this thang.
#'I am so sat' is the understatement of the century#We're too grown for sparring matches with the deliberately obtuse but the offer is still on the table
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10 THINGS I HATE ABOUT YOU (1999) dir. Gil Junger
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sooo I might be dropping an unplanned fic on you guys later. Stay tuned.
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Hailee Steinfeld as Mary.
Mary is “constantly learning how to move through her two worlds without hurting anyone.” Even if that’s inevitably not always possible, there’s never any malice in her actions. “Everything Mary does is rooted in love. Anything and everything she does — it’s not selfish. It's coming from a place of wanting to be connected and wanting to be understood.”-Hailee Steinfeld
Sinners (2025) │ Directed by Ryan Coogler.
#this is about to be the quote that makes me put her in my shirt pocket isn't it#I LIKE Mary. I SURE don't understand the hate (but she's a woman with an attractive love interest of course fandom hates her)#but that just makes me fucking /deflate/ dude.#there's a CLEAR narrative thread here about why the 'villains' fall into 'no man is an island'. & yes the depth & nuance should be explored#but the fact that it's /always/ unforgivable and something only a few vocally empathize with....wack#anyway Mary wasn't a villain. Being vulnerable isn't a sin and neither is wanting to be yourself with the person you love
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1, 2 and 14 :)
What song makes you feel better?
youtube
I am a walking cliche. And Remmick is still my way out.
What is your go to comfort show? I don't really have one, anymore. I'm more likely to choose a comfort movie over a comfort show. (It used to be Ridiculousness, but then we stopped being able to afford cable during COVID. I keep the paranormal shows on Discovery Plus close to my heart, though. (Especially Paranormal Caught on Camera. Speculative found footage bullshit, my beloved.))
Whats something upcoming that you’re excited for? I'm going to meet @shutupwyl next month :) (It has been a very weird and admittedly difficult year outside of the fellowship, community, and love Sinners brought into my life. I wouldn't say I have much to look forward to outside of planting seeds and making art right now -- except for this highly-valued time with my friends. Wintering in some aspects, thriving in others. C'est la vie.)
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