euphoria-svt - Tumblr blog

euphoria-svt · 10 months

Text

so so good!!!!! I loved this sm <3

— eyes meeting, hearts apart ⟢

you could’ve fallen for the childhood friend who owns a flower shop, the singer who takes the stage of the bar every other day. hell, even the landlord’s flirtatious son could’ve been a better choice. but you can’t really help it if your heart longs for a prince who’s in love with somebody else.

★ FEATURING; joshua x reader

★ WORD COUNT; 30.2K words

★ TAGS; bartender!reader, requited unrequited love, immense pining, angst, flowers, slow burn, smut (MINORS DNI)

★ NOTES; first of all, this hellsite was bein difficult w the tags again so ta-da! reupload! that said, please take the pining tag seriously bc i think this has even MORE pining than the first fic in this series and it’s one-sided for a majority of the story :’) ++ this story is the continuation to promise ring, but can be read as a standalone!

★ A WORD IN THANKS; i can’t bear to start this fic without thanking @hwanghyunjinenthusiast <3 rj patiently went over and proofread this fic for me, providing extensively helpful feedback during the process of its creation! ngl i hit a LOT of walls with this given the complexity of the plot and extensive word count. if it weren’t for her, this fic would’ve taken ages to see the light of day.

this is part of the it’s complicated series.

★ SMUT TAGS; implied drunk sex, married sex, unprotected sex, oral (m&f receiving), vaginal fingering, breeding kink, creampie

★ PERMANENT TAGLIST; @cheolhub - @pretty-trustme - @just-here-to-read-01 - @ldkmelkro - @dejavernon - @venusrae - @jyiiscool - @jiniesclub - @junhui-recs - @bldelaine - @featmia - @fruitzcup - @hoeforhao - @candidupped - @billboard-singer - @caratochan - @novalpha - @dahliatopia - @0717luv - @shiveringgaze - @toruro - @mixling-blog @minnie-mouser22 - @homerunhansol - @mirtaspace - @ti--red - @zzucculent - @woozarts - @rubyreduji - @mozellerra - @lllucere

★ SERIES TAGLIST; @ophelia-enthusiast - @hanniemylittlelamb - @ryusha-rose - @thesunsfullmoon

P.S. i reserve the right to refuse to add you to my taglist if you don’t have any age indicators in your profile regardless of whether this work is sfw or not :^)

Closing time is possibly your favorite time of the day.

The pub is always teeming with noise once the evening patrons arrive and while you find yourself enjoying the easygoing commotion, the peace that closing time affords you is a gift like no other.

Most of tonight’s customers have already seen themselves out—drunkenly slurring the songs that the veteran performer, Seokmin, graced them with today. The knights who spent their day off helping themselves to your signature Oak Walker were some of the last to leave. They gave a hefty amount of money as payment for their food and drinks and you figure that they must’ve secured their paychecks recently with how generous they are with the tips.

Now, it’s just you—clearing out tables and polishing glasses—and another person who’s more or less part of the pub’s employee roster with how frequently he lingers after hours.

“What a day.”

At the sound of his voice, you turn to Jihoon with a tired smile. “You can say that again. I thought Seokmin was going to break his vocal chords from the number of songs the two of you played tonight.”

Jihoon, the one in charge of musical accompaniment for the pub’s most popular singer, chuckles before seating himself across one of the barstools. In turn, you pour him a drink despite having already cleaned most of the glasses lined up beneath the bar.

“As much as I’d like to limit our songs to five max per night, I can’t do anything about Seokmin being a people pleaser,” he sighs, bringing the glass to his lips for a sip. “That idiot… We were supposed to take a carriage back to our neighborhood together, but then he decided he wanted to chase after skirts tonight. Saw him leave with two ladies hanging off his arms.”

You spare him a chuckle. “Well, you musical magic users have been racking up the female market more than you think. Kazuha’s been crushing on one of her teachers at the Academy—some guy named Chris if I remember correctly. I’m not sure. All I know is that he teaches musical theory and that he’s way too old for her.”

Jihoon shakes his head. “Speaking of, isn’t your coworker too young to be working here?”

“She’s the owner’s daughter. I don’t really have much of a say about her employment, even if it’s borderline illegal.”

“Point taken.”

The silence sets comfortably inside the empty pub as Jihoon finishes the rest of his drink. He isn’t much of a talker anyway—that’s Seokmin’s area of expertise. The only reason the musician struck up conversation was probably out of the need to be polite. You want to tell him that you’re used to closing up the pub alone so he doesn’t have to worry, but choose not to interrupt the peace and quiet that the two of you have been craving all night.

Once you’re done, you lean against the counter to let your eyes wander for a bit—mentally listing what liquor needs to be restocked, what finger food won’t be available the next day, among other things. The sound of the rain coming down outside makes your contemplation all the more immersive, and you’re just about to wonder if you should invite another singer for tomorrow—considering Seokmin’s…activities tonight—but Jihoon interrupts your train of thought with an odd question.

“Have you heard about the recent news?”

You flash him a puzzled look. “There’s a lot going on in the royal capital, Jihoon. You need to be more specific.”

He rolls his eyes. “I’m talking about the youngest prince’s failed engagement. It’s been the talk of the entire pub all evening. I wasn’t surprised because the entire kingdom was plunged into madness when they announced that the wedding was going to be postponed. I don’t quite get the fanfare, though. What royals do with their love lives isn’t anyone’s business but theirs.”

If he notices the way you stiffen at his words, Jihoon doesn’t show it. You clear your throat, the relaxed expression on your face refusing to falter.

“Well, since they were so public about it, I guess us commoners have the right to at least scrutinize what they show us,” you offer. “But I totally understand not getting why they’re so worked up about it. I don’t pay much attention to those kinds of things either.”

“Right?” Jihoon sighs, exasperated as he takes a longer swig of his drink. “There are a lot more problems that people like us deal with everyday than the engagement of a little prince. Besides, isn't his older brother betrothed to the daughter of some Duke from the southern cities? They’re acting as if the royal bloodline is at risk of extinction.”

“You know, for someone who seems apathetic towards this whole mess, you’re awfully informed.” You flash him a teasing smile. “I didn’t even know Prince Jeonghan was betrothed in the first place. I thought all he did was terrorize the neighboring kingdoms while Prince Joshua cleaned up after him.”

“Our circle of musicians is full of gossip-mongers. I just happen to be there whenever they whisper about it amongst themselves instead of rehearsing,” he explains and you decide to let him off the hook with that one despite sounding just a tad defensive.

Jihoon gets up to make his leave once he finishes his drink—saying something about the rain not letting up anytime soon, so he should just pack up before it gets worse. But just when he’s about to reach for his wallet to pay—

“No need,” you insist before plucking the empty glass off the counter. “This one’s on the house. You worked hard today.”

His brows furrow. “Are you sure?”

“Positive. Just take care out there. Seokmin would be devastated if his partner got struck by lightning.”

“On the contrary, I think he’d be elated to know that he won’t have to come into work while I’m out of commission,” he chuckles before gesturing with a curt bow. “I’ll be heading out then. Thank you for the drink and take care on your way home as well.”

Jihoon hefts the strap of his guitar case over his shoulder before making his way to the door as you busy yourself with cleaning the last glass to put back on the shelf. His footfalls are calm against the polished wood and it’s another sound you appreciate with the rainstorm buzzing faintly in the background.

However, before he can reach for the knob, the door opens all the way—revealing a cloaked figure holding a stack of newspapers above his head. A makeshift umbrella, probably, but it did little to salvage him from the onslaught outside. Jihoon immediately recognizes him despite his disheveled state and lets out a long-winded sigh.

“Hey,” he calls the newcomer’s attention. “The pub’s already closed.”

The man ignores him, his damp cloak fluttering with his movements as he strides towards the bar. Jihoon sighs again, muttering something about bratty royals just doing whatever the hell they want before stepping out into the rain.

You only realize that you’ve got new company when Jihoon pulls the door shut behind him—breath hitching at the sight of a very familiar face as he pulls off his cloak and tosses it on top of the counter along with the newspapers in his grasp.

“Your Highness?” you greet him half-heartedly. “What brings you here?”

It’s not a complete secret that Prince Joshua drops by for the pub every now and again. While not every one of your regulars is aware of his frequent visits, most of the staff have been informed of his tendencies to spend his time here. They’ve been sworn to secrecy, of course.

It’s been over two months since Joshua last showed his face around these parts, however—busy with all the necessary preparations for his wedding, you bet. But from the sullen look on his face, you have a feeling that whatever gossip Jihoon has gotten wind of might have some weight to it.

He doesn’t answer your previous question, so you switch up tactics with, “What are you having tonight?”

“Jihoon said it was already closing time,” he mumbles.

You hum in affirmation. “But you went ahead and made yourself at home despite knowing that anyway, right?”

The corners of his mouth turn up slightly but the smile quickly vanishes. Your chest tightens at the sight of it.

“I guess you’re not wrong,” Joshua laughs quietly before carding his fingers through his rain-soaked hair. “Fix me up a good old Oak Walker, will you?”

You’re not sure if it’s for the best to serve him a glass of the pub’s finest aged whiskey, but a sympathetic part of you says there’s no harm in indulging him.

Joshua nurses his drink across the bar in silence—the ever-present backdrop of rain ringing in both of your ears. His lack of anything to say is mildly off-putting because you’re used to him being all smiles and laughs as he shares the royal ventures that took place after his last visit. More so the royal ventures he had with his fiancée.

To say that you’re itching to ask him about how things are going on with her is an understatement, but you’re no idiot who can’t read the room.

He stays for about twenty minutes, so deep in thought that you’re convinced that he’s forgotten you were there with him at all. Apart from a few sighs of defeat, you don’t hear even the slightest peep out of the prince. Sure, he was never one to be excessively talkative during his visits, but even a stranger can tell that something’s wrong.

Gods. Just how bad is it?

Joshua gently lays down his glass on the counter once he finishes his whiskey—all those etiquette classes easily setting him apart from regulars who slam them down before heaving their obnoxious laughter. He slides his payment across the surface; an amount that comes with change worth more than the drink itself. But before you can tell him the same thing you told Jihoon earlier, he’s already sliding his cloak back on.

“Thanks,” he whispers, adjusting the hood so it somewhat conceals his face. “I really needed that drink.”

…Was it selfish of you to hope he’d say something else? Like he needed your company, for example? It probably is.

Because who are you to have the prince needing your company for?

Joshua’s boots fall heavy against the wooden floor—a far cry from Jihoon’s easygoing strides. As your eyes stay glued on his retreating form, you bite the inside of your cheek. You want to call out to him, ask him what’s wrong, and let him know that you’re there to listen. Just like all the times he’s talked to you about everything he’s come to appreciate about the common realm.

But your voice fails you—just like it did many times before.

It’s only when Joshua is long gone and you’re slinging your satchel over your shoulder that you notice that the Prince left something behind. That stack of newspapers he brought with him when he came in earlier. Most of the flimsy material has been soaked through, but the text was still legible enough to read.

When your gaze catches on the title of the headline, however, you nearly drop it out of pure shock.

WHERE HAS THE RUNAWAY PRINCESS GONE?

On the first day of spring, the shock of a lifetime befalls the ears of every citizen of not only the capital, but the entire kingdom of Seraphia. The youngest Crown Prince, Joshua, invited scribes from all across the land into the great halls of the royal castle to finally address the previous week’s hot topic: the postponement of his wedding ceremony with future Princess-Consort Hyejin, who was dubbed as the kingdom’s sweetheart by the general public over the past year.

The blossoming romance between the royal couple charmed thousands of Seraphians, which vastly contributed to the sizzling anticipation for their marriage. It was due to take place in the courtyard of the royal castle once the snow has thawed and the kingdom is able to welcome spring with open arms. Needless to say, it would’ve been the perfect setting for a perfect celebration!

However, it was announced by the Queen herself a fortnight ago that the ceremony had to be postponed for reasons that would be disclosed in the future—causing quite an uproar amongst the populace. Not a word of input was heard from both Prince Joshua and Hyejin themselves and any information regarding the topic was put on tight reins. Some speculated that there were merely a few inconveniences that had to be sorted out first before the royal couple could officially tie the knot; others assumed that one or either of them fell ill and were simply waiting for swift recovery.

But today, we learned that not all fairytales have happy endings. Prince Joshua officially announced the complete dissolution of his engagement to Hyejin as well as the retraction of all previous news of the matrimonial ceremony.

If the postponement caused an uproar, the latest update on our favorite couple’s situation has ignited chaos of insurmountable levels. The scribes that were present in the impromptu press conference begged for more details about the matter, but Prince Joshua requested for the citizens to remain calm about the entire ordeal—saying it was a mutual decision that he and Hyejin had come to make together. He also pleaded for the public to give them the privacy they both direly needed in such a trying time with the reassurance that the couple simply agreed that they were not fit to be each other’s spouse, despite Hyejin being eleven months into her royal assimilation period.

Several conflicting opinions have since sprouted about the latest scoop on the previously renowned royal couple. Speculations of third parties came into light, especially since Hyejin has yet to make a public appearance to address all these issues herself.

Has the Princess-Consort really run away? Find out more in next week’s issue of the Daily Tribune!

As you read over the last paragraph, you notice frost starting to gather at your fingertips—a manifestation of your emotions.

You’re quick to shake your head and retract your magic before you end up freezing the entire stack of papers with your touch alone. Not without cursing the gods for giving you an elemental affinity that’s painfully in tune with your emotional constitution, of course.

You decide to throw the newspapers in the trash—figuring that Joshua must place little importance in them if he left them in the state they were in. He’ll come across dozens of copies in the plaza if he ever wants another one anyway.

When you get home that night, you immediately treat yourself to a nice, hot bath before heading straight to bed, not seeing any incentive in staying up overthinking the recent news. But no matter how many blankets you bury yourself under, no matter how much wood you toss into the hearth…

Your fingers remain startlingly cold.

The first time Prince Joshua showed up in the bar, it was raining as well. In fact, it was storming.

Business was slow. None of the regulars wanted to hassle themselves by braving the storm just to get their daily fix of alcohol and the owner couldn’t even convince any of the usual singers to show up that night.

So it’s just you and the owner’s children, Kazuha and Yuta.

“Do you think something interesting’s going to happen today?” Kazuha sighs, drumming her fingers across the counter with a bored look. “Father shouldn’t have opened the pub when I told him multiple times that the weather is going to be like this.”

Yuta snorts from the other side of the bar, passing small crackles of lightning between his hands before getting up to pour himself a drink. “You know the old man is going to grab every opportunity to turn in some profit. Even if only a single customer goes through those doors tonight, he’d consider it worth sending three employees into a storm.”

“If that’s the case, we should just sneak a few banknotes in today’s order tally and call it a day,” Kazuha huffs before turning to you. “You’re with me on this, right?”

Pursing your lips, you raise your hands up in a gesture of indignation. “Don’t come dragging me into your schemes, Zuha. I have no intention of getting prematurely fired.”

Kazuha groans and Yuta snorts before handing you a glass of bourbon.

“The least the old man can do is treat us to a few drinks, whether or not he knows about it,” he snickers as you take the glass from his hand. “Cheers?”

“What, so she gets a drink but your little sister doesn’t?” Kazuha scowls. “I get that you’ve got no one else to use your cheap pick-up lines on tonight, but how could you flirt so shamelessly in front of me?”

You placate her with an apologetic smile. “You know Yuta will have an aneurysm if he doesn’t express interest in anyone from the female population that isn't family. I’m just keeping one of my boss’ kids from keeling over.”

“Harsh as ever,” Yuta sighs before you clink your glasses together. “No wonder you have ice magic.”

“Say that again and I’ll freeze your entire drink, lover boy.”

As you continue playfully bickering with the siblings, you start to consider Kazuha’s suggestion a bit more seriously. It’s nearly time to close up shop and not a single soul has gone through the front door and it doesn’t seem like the rain is going to let up any time soon. Which is all sorts of strange because it rarely ever rains in Seraphia in the middle of summer.

But that’s exactly how the youngest prince walked into your life—like a summer rainstorm.

He’s soaked all over, tracking water all over the floorboards with a shiver to his posture. You don’t recognize who he is at first—all bundled up in his cloak—but when the newcomer pulls off his hood, you and the siblings end up gaping at him like fishes out of water.

Because what on earth is Prince Joshua doing in some dingy pub in the middle of the night when it’s raining buckets outside?

“Hello,” he says kindly, not a breath out of beat despite the fact that he’s dripping from head to toe. “One of the knights told me this place sells the best whiskey in the capital.”

Surprisingly, Kazuha is the first out of the three of you to snap out of your collective stupor—putting on her best smile before replying with, “You’ve heard right. Would you like a glass, Your Highness?”

The formal address seems to fluster him and you find it slightly amusing to see a perfectly put-together royal’s ears turning red. “Please, no need to call me that.”

“I’m pretty sure we’ll be marching at the gallows if we called you by your first name, Your Highness,” Yuta interjects, grabbing a glass before heading over to the whiskey kegs. “You’re just in time, actually. We were just about to close early.”

“I figured,” Joshua chuckles before hanging his damp cloak on the rack by the entrance. “I didn’t think this place would be open, actually. Every other pub I’ve passed was closed for the night.”

Kazuha rolls her eyes. “You have the owner to thank for that.”

The siblings easily accommodate the prince himself as if he was just another customer they served on any other night. You suppose it comes from practically growing up in this place when their father still manned the bar. But still, how could they act so normally around someone as important as Joshua?

Then again…

They don’t know him the way you do.

“Hey,” Kazuha whispers when you flutter off to the side, letting Yuta entertain tonight’s esteemed guest with his lightning magic. “You’re acting a little weird. I get he’s royalty and everything, but this isn’t the first time we’ve had to cater to nobles. Father’s pub is well known for a reason.”

You take a deep breath as your eyes momentarily flicker to the prince who’s awed by Yuta’s little display. For someone who was just out in the rain, he still looked unfairly breathtaking. His damp hair is somewhat slicked back, tiny droplets dripping down every now and again. And even if his clothes—made from the finest of textiles, no doubt—haven’t been spared by the rain, his poise makes it seem as if he didn’t just rush out of a storm.

You’ve spotted Prince Joshua whenever there are festivals in the city every now and again. He’s a benevolent royal that likes spending time with commoners—not one to mind the class divide like other nobles. But you’ve never seen him this close in a while.

The sight of Joshua now reminds you of several years before.

Memories of a rushing river and a runaway pup. Of a young prince and flowers given to the brave. They all come back to you like these events happened yesterday and not more than a decade ago.

But with all those fond memories also comes a firm reminder.

You and him are on opposite ends. You...should keep that in mind.

“Hello? You’re spacing out on me again.”

Finally, you snap out of it and catch Kazuha staring at you with a look of concern. Your coworker even flattens a palm across your forehead to feel for your temperature. “Are you sure you’re okay? Not running a fever or anything? You can go home early if you need to. Yuta and I can take care of him just fine.”

You’re about to insist that you’re fine, but before you can get a word out, you hear Yuta calling your name from the other side—a no good smirk on his face as he gestures for you to come over.

“This is our number one bartender and resident Ice Queen,” he introduces and you scowl at him immediately. “She might concoct the best drinks in the entire district, but she’s got an ice cold heart! Don’t try to flirt with her or she’ll turn your drink into a block of ice.”

“Weirdo. I’m only like that to you,” you hiss.

Yuta giggles and you want nothing more than to smack him. “Oh? So does that mean I’m special?”

“No. That means you’re the only one irritating enough to get a rise out of her,” Kazuha backs you up with a sigh before turning to Joshua. “Sorry about these two. They can’t sit in the same room for five minutes without a fight breaking out.”

Thanks to both siblings, your earlier hesitation to let the prince even perceive you dissipates in a flash. You cast Yuta an annoyed stare before finishing the rest of the bourbon he’d poured for you earlier. “Well, no fights would be happening if Yuta stopped basing his entire personality off of being a playboy.”

“Gods, it’s not that deep, Ice Queen. Chill out.”

“I’m going to put arsenic in your next drink. Mark my words.”

While you and the eldest son of the owner are neck and neck, you hear Joshua stifle a laugh in his seat. You and Yuta turn to look at him abruptly, wondering what’s so funny.

“Sorry, I just found it amusing how easily such threats come from either of you,” he muses, swirling his glass so that the ice crinkles inside. “If anyone said that to me in the royal castle, even in a jest, they’d be thrown in the dungeons immediately.”

“And that’s why we’re going to be civil whenever His Highness is around, aren’t we?” Kazuha flashes the two of you a thin smile. Despite being the youngest out of your trio, she’s definitely the most level-headed.

“Of course,” Yuta responds coolly. “Prince Joshua doesn’t have to worry about Ice Queen here poisoning his drinks. She was starstruck the moment he set foot inside—ow!”

Kazuha clicks her tongue as Yuta rubs the spot on his head where his little sister just clocked him. “What did I just say about being civil?”

Sparing the siblings another laugh, Joshua then turns his attention to you. “It’s nice to meet you as well. Pray tell, why is he calling you Ice Queen? You seem like a warm enough person to me.”

You don’t know if it’s the unusually chilly air or his comment that makes the blood rush to your cheeks, but either way, you attempt to mask it by coughing into your hand before giving him an answer.

“Um, that’s just Yuta being Yuta.”

“No, she practices ice magic,” the little bastard interjects. “Hate how she’s so good at using it too ‘cause whenever she says she’ll freeze my drinks, half the time, it isn’t a bluff.”

Kazuha stares at him flatly. “Only because you deserve it.”

“See, now she’s turned my own blood against me!” Yuta whines.

The prince chuckles to himself again, taking another sip. “So all three of you are magic users as well?”

Yuta nods. “Mhmm. I’ve got lightning magic, Ice Queen’s got ice magic, and Kazuha’s got wind magic. Little sis can actually tell when there’s a storm coming, too.”

“Oh? So you anticipated that the weather would be like this?”

The siblings both groan in unison—clearly recalling how their father insisted for them to open the pub despite the atrocious weather.

Joshua is immediately immersed with Kazuha explaining the technicalities of her magic and the prince gives his own input on how being able to predict the weather would benefit not just the royal capital, but the entire kingdom of Seraphia.

It’s so…like him to apply the things he learns to such an altruistic cause.

“I’m acquainted with a few wind elementals, but none of them have tried anticipating the shift in the weather like you do,” the prince comments, quite impressed, before turning to Yuta. “I suppose you have a similar ability as well?”

Your coworker shakes his head vehemently. “I can only feel a thunderstorm when it’s already here. If you want someone who can pick up even the slightest changes in the weather, Zuha’s your girl.”

Despite the rare praise from her brother, Kazuha merely scoffs. “It’s all useless if Father will tell us to open up shop in the middle of a storm anyway.”

“I suppose so,” Joshua agrees with a sigh. “How about you? What do you use your magic for?”

It takes you a moment to realize that he was talking to you. “Pardon?”

The grin that spreads on his face is bright enough to light up a storm-ridden evening. “Your magic. I’m sure you don’t just use it to freeze Yuta’s drinks, now do you?”

Yuta snorts into his drink while Kazuha elbows him in the stomach. You keep yourself from letting out a laugh of your own. You can trust Kazuha to have your back all the time.

“Well, aside from that and enchanting the ice in our customers’ drinks so they won’t melt too quickly, I…don’t use my magic that much,” you admit, scratching the back of your head out of mild embarrassment. “Ice magic isn’t as versatile as water magic. It doesn’t have a lot of everyday uses. Plus, I could accidentally kill someone if I don’t keep my emotions in check.”

For the first time tonight, Joshua’s pearly white smile falls. “What do you mean?”

When you feel the skin of your fingertips prickling with a chilly sensation, you immediately ball your fists at your side—not wanting to give the prince a firsthand demonstration of your…magical affliction just yet.

“Elemental magic is easily influenced by the user’s emotions,” you murmur, purposely avoiding Joshua’s scrutinizing gaze. “But…mine has always been a little on the unstable side. I don’t use it a lot because if idiots like Yuta rile me up too badly, I might end up launching an icicle through his chest without thinking.”

“Hey!” The pub’s resident player complains. “That example is a little too scary. Couldn’t you have gone with ‘I might give him frostbite all over’ first?”

Kazuha glances at him bizarrely. “Isn’t that worse?”

Joshua hums contemplatively, taking another swig of whiskey. “Hmm. We’re on the same boat then. I don’t use my magic very often either.”

“You don’t?” you ask incredulously.

“Yes. The royal family as a whole doesn’t rely on magic much. We have the royal mages to take care of anything involving the practice altogether,” he explains, pouting a little when he realizes his glass is empty. You move to pour him another round, but the prince shakes his head. “Instead of attending the Academy like most children our age did, my brother and I were thrust into the world of diplomatic relations at the ripe ages of twelve and fourteen. After all, you don’t need magic when you’re locked in a battle of wits in the royal court.”

Yuta and Kazuha nod in understanding, but the expression on your face is the exact opposite.

“But…your magic is so pretty,” you muse absentmindedly. “Why shouldn’t you use it? Especially when there’s lots of people who look up to you?”

You can feel Kazuha shooting you that reprimanding stare she constantly gives to her brother, but you can’t help it. Not when you’ve witnessed the prince’s magic firsthand—even if it was a long time ago.

“They don’t look up to me because of my magic, sadly,” Joshua chuckles, seeing no offense in your question. “But…I find it more amusing that you say that as if you’ve seen my magic. It’s been years since I last used it, much less shown it to another person.”

Three pairs of eyes flicker to your form expectantly and you can feel your heart drop to the pit of your stomach. Fuck.

“U-Uh, I just remember seeing it during your coronation ceremony,” you stammer. “When you conjured an entire bouquet out of thin air to give to the Queen as thanks.”

You’re not exactly lying since you did see the youngest son of the royal family showcase his magic once he was hailed as the second Crown Prince. It was a joyous occasion for the royal capital—as Joshua held promise where his older brother Jeonghan did not.

“I see. You have an amazing memory then,” Joshua commends with a smile that makes your heart flutter traitorously. “I didn’t think anyone would remember that.”

You have half the mind to tell him that you remember a lot more about him than just that. But the same words echo inside your head—over and over like a dreadful reminder of the striking reality you were born in.

You and him are on opposite ends.

You’re not certain if you should feel happy or not about the growing frequency of Prince Joshua’s visits.

He doesn’t really do much in the pub. For someone who grew up being the center of attention, Joshua actually does a good job at blending in the crowd unnoticed. The prince is merely an observer—quietly sipping his drinks as your patrons let chaos loose all around him.

You and the siblings manage to keep his undercover visits discreet for about a week at most until the pub’s regular performer, Seokmin, finally notices the cloaked figure that always takes a seat at the bar whenever he drops by.

“So the fabled Prince Joshua can actually drink cheap liquor,” the singer chuckles once the last of the regular patrons have left, clinking glasses with Joshua as if he was just another one of his drinking buddies. “Here I thought royals only had fine wines imported aaaaall the way from the vineyards of the next kingdom over.”

That earns him a smack upside the head by his fellow musician, Jihoon. “Keep talking loosely like that and you might just get thrown into the dungeons.”

“And our drinks are far from cheap,” Yuta adds with an eyeroll.

As usual, Joshua dismisses all their concerns with an easy laugh, insisting that there’s no need for anyone to be afraid of being imprisoned for being casual with him.

“When I’m here, I want you all to think of me just like everyone else,” he says with a smile so genuine, not a single staff member could even hope to refuse him.

Since he’s quite exceptional at keeping a low profile, it was mutually decided by everyone to just let the prince do as he pleases—soaking in all the noise and bonding over conversation with you and the other staff members after hours. It’s an unlikely interaction and an even unlikelier friendship, but you wouldn’t trade it for the world.

Kazuha even joked that there’s no harm in seeing a pretty face every now and again. While you completely agreed, she doesn’t have to know that. Not at all.

He sticks around through the scorching hot summer and even the bleakest of winter. It’s gotten to the point that none of you are baffled by his constant presence anymore. By the time spring is upon Seraphia, Joshua still lingers by the sidelines.

Then comes the day the royal family announced that they were looking for wind elementals interested in becoming the kingdom’s first Stormwatchers. Yuta’s first reaction upon hearing the news was to put his little sister up for the job, but since Kazuha is yet to graduate from the Academy, she immediately shot down his encouragement.

Along with that is the city-wide notice of an upcoming music festival. Similar celebrations aren’t rare in Seraphia, but one dedicated solely to singing and dancing in the streets of the capital is the first of its kind. Seokmin and Jihoon’s circle of musicians practically implodes with glee at the news—your two regular performers immediately asking for a few nights off in order to make the necessary preparations for the festival.

With so many things sprouting in everyone’s agendas, it’s no surprise that you don’t see Joshua for a while either. You have an inkling that all these new updates from the royal family have something to do with the things the prince has learned during his time hanging out in the pub.

You’re not sure whether that’s a good thing or not, but the mere thought has you sighing dreamily like a schoolgirl with a crush.

“Oh, it’s been a while.”

Stopping by the Jeon Flower Emporium isn’t something you get to do a lot given the nature of your job and the biorhythm it forces you to operate on. The owner, Wonwoo, is one of your long-time friends. He typically opens up shop at the crack of dawn and packs everything away an hour before dusk. When you do get to drop by, it’s typically on your days off—much like today.

“Good morning, Wonwoo.” You smile at him before letting your eyes drift onto the bouquet he’s putting together by the counter. “How has business been faring?”

Wonwoo cracks you a grin that would make any maiden swoon as he ties the flowers together with expert hands. “A bit slow, if I’m being honest. But I am hopeful for more customers now that the royal family announced a music festival coming up. Those kinds of things bring in more tourists to the capital than you’d think.”

The two of you exchange quiet laughs before Wonwoo tells you about a rather complicated order he received a few days ago.

“An entire plant box full of flowers,” he chuckles. “I haven’t done any orders like that before, but this client is sort of a big deal, so I couldn’t really refuse.”

“I’m sure you won’t disappoint,” you encourage him. “My mother doesn’t consider you her favorite florist for nothing, you know.”

Wonwoo shakes his head. “My mother is Auntie's favorite florist. Don’t go mixing things up just to flatter me. Oh, by the way…”

“Hm? What is it?”

Your friend leaves the bouquet he’s been putting together for a moment before walking off to one of the many shelves inside his shop. Wonwoo hums a song that you could’ve sworn you’d heard Seokmin sing a few nights ago before his eyes light up once he finds what he’s looking for.

“I received a shipment of these from Ancarra yesterday and I immediately thought of you,” he says, gesturing for you to come closer.

Curiously, you pad over to Wonwoo’s side, taking a look at what he wanted to show you. The moment your eyes catch on a beautiful patch of daisies, however, you feel your mouth go dry.

“I still remember the time Auntie asked my mother to preserve the little daisy you found back then,” Wonwoo murmurs all while caressing the flowers with his gloved hand before shifting his spectacled gaze towards you. “Do you still have it?”

If Wonwoo sees the way you hesitate to answer his question, he doesn’t show it. “I do. It’s in my parents’ house though. I feel like if I took it with me to my place, it would die in three business days despite the preservation magic.”

“Nonsense,” Wonwoo laughs. “You’re always so hard on yourself. Just because you have ice magic, doesn’t mean that every plant you touch will freeze up and die.”

“You don’t know that.”

Your friend rolls his eyes. “I do. Now, if you’ll excuse me for a second because—”

“Oh. Fancy seeing you here.”

You nearly jump out of your own skin when you hear that familiar voice calling out from behind you. Unlike yourself, Wonwoo isn’t even fazed by the sudden arrival of one Prince Joshua inside his shop. In fact, he even beams at the unexpected(?) visitor. Does everyone think meeting royalty like this isn’t a big deal anymore?

“H-Hello, Your Highness,” you stammer, trying not to get too distracted by the way he carries himself so gallantly. It’s the first time you’ve seen him out of his usual disguises whenever he stops by the pub. You would’ve appreciated a heads up from the gods so you can at least mentally prepare yourself for this.

“I often stop by here to admire Wonwoo’s flowers since there aren’t a lot of them in the castle.” Joshua smiles—that pearly white smile that could easily bring you to your knees—before turning to face Wonwoo. “Well…that and I have a pending order from our resident florist here.”

So he’s the one who booked Wonwoo for that order he was talking about earlier.

“I see…” You muse, forcibly taming your heartbeat into normalcy. “But, can’t you just grow them yourself? Or have someone else grow them for you? I’m certain your servants would be more than happy to do it for you.”

You half-expect Joshua to downplay your words like he usually would whenever someone in the pub brought up something concerning the castle. He’s a man who likes deflecting things like that easily, never one to talk about complicated topics.

But for some reason, Joshua’s smile falls just a little before he lets out an airy laugh.

“Haha, I wish I could.”

Wonwoo eventually excuses himself because he still has an order to put together before his client comes to pick the flowers up. You want to tell Wonwoo not to leave you alone with Joshua because you might just melt into a puddle right there on the floor of his shop, but alas, your friend sees no problem in doing just that.

You fear that it would be too awkward to bear. This is the first time you’ve been around the prince without anyone else pitching into the conversation. Would he think you’re not worth talking to? Would he think you were strange for not being casual with him like everyone else seems to be?

The flurry of questions that surge inside your head sort of angers you because…you never overthink your interactions with other people to this extent. You’re a bartender, for gods’ sake. It’s your job to talk to people.

“So how do you and Wonwoo know each other?”

You perk up at the prince’s question. It’s not that you didn’t expect him to initiate—because of course he would—but you’re mildly thrown off guard by the inquiry.

“Our mothers were best friends,” you explain, tucking your clammy hands behind your back.

Joshua raises an eyebrow. “Were?”

“Oh, uh, Wonwoo’s mother passed away a few years ago.” Glancing over his shoulder, you watch Wonwoo quietly work on the bouquet with an easygoing look on his face, making sure your voice won’t reach him. “She used to own this shop, but Wonwoo has been manning it ever since her passing. He even quit the Academy just so he can keep the business afloat.”

From the looks of it, this seems like news to Joshua. “I’m— I’m sorry. The question was somewhat out of turn. Forgive me.”

You shake your head. “There’s absolutely no need to apologize, Your Highness. Wonwoo is perfectly happy with continuing his mother’s legacy like this. I’m sure you’ve seen it for yourself.”

“Hmm… He is very passionate about his work,” Joshua notes with a small smile. “I wouldn’t have commissioned him to arrange my order if that wasn’t the case.”

“Speaking of…” Your voice trails off, recalling the details that Wonwoo imparted earlier about an entire plant box full of flowers. “If I may ask, what’s the occasion? Are you perhaps ordering the flowers for the music festival?”

Joshua blinks in nonplus, as if taken aback by your inquiry as well. Still, his posture doesn’t falter and he shakes his head with a chuckle—a tinge of red dusting both his cheeks and the tips of his ears.

“No. It’s for someone I’ve had my eyes on for a while now,” he admits and you feel your heart sink at the shy manner he says it.

Someone he’s had his eyes on…

It shouldn’t surprise you that someone like Prince Joshua could arrange such grand gestures for the person who makes his heart race. But the fact that he has a person like that makes your stomach twist uncomfortably.

You’re happy for him. A person who constantly looks after the people as often and as earnestly as Joshua does deserves a person he can lean on from time to time, too. But you can’t deny the ugly feeling that coils in your chest at the knowledge no matter how badly you want to.

Fortunately, Joshua is quick to change the topic before you can force yourself to voice out your well wishes for his pursuit of a lover.

“Now that you mentioned the music festival though, I’m glad the news has reached you,” he laughs softly. “It took me a while to convince the old crones in the royal court to put the show underway. The gods know how stubborn they can be when it comes to making what they think are unnecessary expenses. But I thought it would be a good avenue to bring together not just the nobles and commoners of the capital, but also the kingdom’s musicians.”

You don’t know how to react first—be endeared at the thought that he thinks so fondly of his constituents or laugh at the fact that the epitome of princeliness himself called the elders of the royal court ‘old crones’. In the end, you decide on neither and just appreciate the fact that he’s comfortable enough to tell you all of this.

“You got that right,” you tell him. “Yuta, Kazuha, and I were getting sick of the old traditional festivals. I’m pretty sure I can say the same for the rest of the people in the city, so it’s good that you decided to spice things up a little. What’s more is that you’re inviting people outside the capital for the festivities.”

Joshua nods as if it’s the most natural thing in the world. “Well, everyone within the borders of Seraphia is our people. It wouldn’t be fair for anyone to confine the celebrations here.”

Gods. How were you supposed to not fall for someone like him?

“That said, may I do the honors of inviting you and the others back at the pub?” He offers up another handsome smile. “Seokmin and Jihoon already signed up as performers along with a couple of other musicians all across the kingdom. I figured that all of you would appreciate getting front row seats to the show.”

Pushing away any and all unsavory thoughts about the prince and his would-be muse, you muster up a smile that, admittedly, doesn’t really reach your eyes.

“Well, if it’s a personal invite from the prince himself, we’d be heathens not to accept.”

You part ways with Joshua and Wonwoo a few moments later, saying that you still have some errands to run in the market. Definitely not because it stings to stare at someone who you never had a chance to have for even a second longer.

But before you’re even ten steps away from the front door of the Jeon Flower Emporium, someone forcibly yanks on your arm—making you whirl around with equal parts confusion and surprise. When you realize it’s Joshua, you’re even more flabbergasted than you already are.

He pants as if he just sprinted out of the shop just to catch you—his princely demeanor making way for something bordering on desperate, but not really. Though you can’t pay his constitution that much mind because you’re hyper focused on the way his warm fingers enclose your wrist.

“I-Is anything the matter, Your Highness?”

Joshua startles at the question as if he was in a trance himself. He takes a second to gather his thoughts before straightening out—clearing his throat awkwardly with his fist before offering you something in his other hand.

A daisy.

“I swear I’m going to pay for that when I go back to the shop,” he clarifies with a sheepish look.

With hesitance shining on your face, you accept his gift, trying not to collapse in a heap of tears in the middle of town. Joshua’s eyes seem to light up when you take it from his hand and you will your magic not to ruin the moment—to let you have something nice for once.

“Thank you,” you murmur, unable to help the way your face reddens. “But…why?”

“Why?”

“Why’d you give this to me?”

The pleased look on Joshua’s face morphs into confusion and then…embarrassment.

“I…” His voice trails off as if he’s struggling to find the words. “I just thought even the Ice Queen deserves to receive flowers.”

If it was Yuta who said those words to your face, you would’ve blasted him with a hit from your ice magic. But this isn’t Yuta, it’s Joshua.

The prince you’ve been in love with since you were ten years old.

You don’t know the rhyme or reason behind his choice to pluck one of Wonwoo’s freshly imported daisies off the shelves; to run after you—a complete nobody—out of the shop before you can go any farther. But you bring the dainty little flower to your chest, cradling it carefully in your hands like you’re afraid it will vanish in an instant.

Instead of going to the market like you initially planned, you make a detour to your childhood home near the outskirts of the capital. You catch your father chopping wood in the front yard while your mother prepares lunch inside the house. Needless to say, your parents are more than happy to see you back home.

After having a quick meal with them, your father goes back to making enough lumber for the neighborhood while you ask your mother, “Can I see the flowers again?”

A puzzled look graces her face, but she nods anyway—leading you to the back where she grew flowers the same way she raised you.

“Have you seen Wonwoo lately, dear?” she wonders as she lets you marvel at the garden that continues to grow every time you visit. “He always asks about the little daisy his mother enchanted back then. Saying he’s concerned her preservation magic might fade away, but he keeps forgetting she used to be one of the best plant mages in the entire kingdom. That boy, seriously…”

As your mother drones on and on about Wonwoo’s concerns, your heart warms at the sight of a small pedestal that your mother bought to place the flower in question.

It’s a little daisy just like the one Joshua handed to you earlier today. But what makes this one different is that, not only is it enchanted with the preservation magic of Wonwoo’s late mother, but it was given to you once upon a time by the same prince that still makes your heart flutter to this day.

Ten year-old Prince Joshua fashioned it with his own hands, with his own magic before giving it to you as a gift.

For being braver than anyone I’ve ever seen with my own two eyes.

You place the brand new daisy right next to it in the pot—despite knowing that it probably won’t take root anymore and that the preservation magic won’t extend to it as well. Your mother watches your every move with a confused look on her face, but asks no questions.

You hoped she wouldn’t. Especially since you still live by the things she told you when you were still younger.

You and him are on opposite ends. You must keep that in mind.

“Anything interesting going on at work?”

That’s the first thing she asks when you head back to the living room to gather the rest of your things. You humor her with a noncommittal hum.

“Not really. Why?”

She pouts. “Really? No suitors at all?” You groan, but your mother just continues. “Wonwoo could be a good choice, dear. He’s always such a sweetheart. Maybe even that singer you keep telling me about…Seokmin? Oh, but aren’t you getting along well with your employer’s son, too? What’s his name? Yuta?”

“Mother,” you plead—nearly balking at the idea of being romantically involved with any of the men she just mentioned. (Okay, maybe Wonwoo isn’t too bad of a choice, but that’s not the point here.)

She ends up giggling like a socialite who just heard the juiciest gossip from her friends, but in the end your mother resorts to just smoothing her hand comfortingly across your back.

“I know, I know. It’s just that you’re at marriageable age now, dear. You should start thinking about these things sooner rather than later.”

Sooner rather than later, huh…

Even as you make the trip back to the city to run the errands you’ve been putting off, your mother’s words echo inside your head over and over.

In hindsight, you could’ve fallen for the childhood friend who owns a flower shop, the singer who takes the stage of the bar every other day. Hell, even the owner’s flirtatious son could’ve been a better choice.

But you can’t really help it if your heart longs for a prince who’s in love with somebody else.

It doesn’t take long before Prince Joshua’s engagement is announced.

The kingdom is in high spirits—talk of the youngest prince finally tying the knot like he deserves fills every nook and cranny of the capital for days to come. He’s going to be wed to a commoner from the far east by spring next year and when Kazuha read the headline about it out loud one night at the pub, you try your best to act as supportive as you wished you were.

A commoner. He’s going to be marrying a commoner—not some socialite from high society, not a royal like himself, but a commoner.

Someone like you, but at the same time isn’t because you doubt you’d be able to charm someone like Joshua in the next life either. It’s a bitter thought that simmers in the back of your head, but you’re smart enough not to dwell on it too much.

As expected, Joshua’s visits start to grow few and far in-between after that. Apart from his engagement with a woman named Hyejin, he’s tasked to venture off to the neighboring kingdom of Ancarra for the purpose of strengthening diplomatic relations. The gossip mongers in the pub whisper about how his older brother Jeonghan is accompanying him as well since his rumored fiancée is of Ancarran royalty but you can hardly vouch for the credibility of your alcoholic regulars.

That said, it’s become somewhat…lonelier in the pub.

A few months after Joshua’s engagement, Kazuha was required by the Academy to venture far north to train under a wind mage rumored to be hundreds of years old. But you can’t really trust anything that Yuta says, so you simply sent her off with a bottle of aged wine to enjoy during her stay in case she misses you too much.

Then there’s Yuta, your arch-nemesis. The bastard actually went ahead and got himself a day job at the local swordsmith’s shop. Though the need for weaponry has decreased over the years since there are no longer any wars to fight, he seemed very optimistic about his new occupation, so you didn’t say a word—not even in playful spite—when he broke the news. To his credit, he promised to hire additional staff to compensate for the loss in manpower, and that he’d still drop by the pub whenever he isn’t too exhausted.

“So that you won’t get too lonely without us,” Yuta snickered before you froze his champagne before he could even take a sip.

With both Prince Joshua and the siblings preoccupied with their own lives, that leaves you with less company than you’re used to. The new hires that Yuta promised offered more help than he ever did in the pub, but Shotaro and Sungchan are still too nervous to speak to you casually, much less squander time with you after hours. They’re out of the doors once they’ve helped clean up for closing time—leaving you with only Jihoon and Seokmin to hang out with in the rare chance that they still have energy after a long night of performing.

Every now and again, you catch a whiff of gossip in the wind—just some insignificant updates about Joshua. Both for his engagement and the constant back-and-forth trips he makes between Seraphia and Ancarra.

Rumor has it that the royal family is hosting a ball after a while to mark Hyejin’s sixth month into her royal assimilation. It would be her first public appearance as Joshua’s fiancée, so it would make sense that more than half the citizens in the capital are highly anticipating it.

The news doesn’t bother you as much as the engagement did. By now, your attraction to the prince is water under the bridge. Who cares if you were close enough to befriend him at one point? To let him become someone even more, if you’re pushing your delusions into the light? You’re content with having him as a friend and those nights you spent with your rowdy bunch in the pub are things you’d definitely spend years cherishing from the bottom of your heart.

In fact, you actually started to consider your mother’s advice recently. Though you’re nowhere near old, you’re not getting any younger either. Maybe you should start being more proactive with looking for a lover to settle down with in the future.

The first candidate is Wonwoo.

He’s handsome enough that even noble socialites would ogle him by the window of his shop—going as far as purchasing bouquets just for a chance to speak with him. Plus, you practically grew up with him. If you were to pursue the man, you’d be past the awkward phase of getting to know each other.

But you also remember Wonwoo bringing up that he isn’t really looking for anything romantic. He mentioned wanting to focus on the shop and provide for his father and younger brother at home. This happened before you started considering him as a prospect of your future affections, so that definitely saved you the time and effort and sheer trepidation that comes with switching things up with your childhood friend. Besides, you never really saw him that way.

The next is Seokmin.

You’re not really sure why your mother even brought his name up when listing your potential lovers. Sure, you and him would dance around the pub after hours once both of you have had a drink too many, but things between you and the veteran singer never really bordered on anything more than platonic. Plus, Seokmin has a habit of sleeping with different women every week. It’s not that you have anything against that, but it just goes to show that he’s definitely not ready to settle down either.

Last is…Yuta.

Out of all the men your mother considered having as a son-in-law, he was definitely the last one you’d choose. Not only does he push all of your buttons and piss you off for the hell of it, but he’s even worse than Seokmin when it comes to his playboy tendencies.

What makes it worse is that he’s so discreet about it, too! Most of the pub’s patrons simply know Yuta as the owner’s cool son with equally cool lightning magic. Despite how he looks, surely he wouldn’t be the type to break a poor maiden’s heart after one passionate night with them, right?

The answer to that is: no.

You and Kauzha have dealt with dozens of ladies acting as if Yuta scorned them because the bastard just left without a word in the morning after a night of debauchery. Seokmin at least has the decency to say goodbye to his paramours and sets clear boundaries. There’s absolutely none of that with Yuta.

Which means you’re definitely smart enough to not get involved with someone like him. You’ve already set Prince Joshua as the standard. Surely, you wouldn’t find yourself in a situation where you have to pick the bar off the floor, right? For a man who you’d rather throw into a pool full of eels than say a polite good evening to, no less.

The answer to that is…

Also no.

In your defense, you were drunk. And lonely. And you never really denied the fact that, for all his irritating glory, Yuta is still objectively attractive.

Besides, it’s not like the two of you went all the way. You merely confided your lack of a love life to him one random Saturday evening since Kazuha was already away for training. You wouldn’t dare admit it to his face, but Yuta was actually good at holding a decent conversation once the both of you got your heads out of your asses.

You told him about Joshua, about your mother’s advice, and about how you feel like you’re going to die all alone in the world. He snickered, saying you’re overreacting again, but he doesn’t make any snide quips about the way you felt.

Instead he propositioned you with, “How about this: let me kiss you. If you don’t feel anything—not even a single spark—then you might as well cross me out of your list of potential lovers.”

You remember staring at him incredulously before slurring, “But you can always just shock me with your magic, asshole. Don’t try to cheat your way into my heart.”

“You really think I’d cheat over something like this?”

He sounded so serious when he asked, you didn’t have the heart to bite back with a snarky reply. Instead, you let your eyes drift to his grimacing lips.

Yuta isn’t Joshua—he’ll never be.

But you’ll never be with the prince either, so you took the leap of faith, fisted the front of Yuta’s shirt, and kissed him.

Part of you is convinced that night changed the way things were between the two of you, despite his insistence that it’s alright, Ice Queen. I’m just not your type, and that’s not a big deal at all. Maybe it was what made him get a day job so he’d have an excuse to see you less—to talk to you less.

But you never really liked making things about you so you never really said anything when you watched Yuta walk out of the pub that night—with a slump to his shoulders that you can’t quite forget about.

Thankfully, things seem to have reverted back to normal when he visits tonight, giving Sungchan and Shotaro a run for their money with how many mugs of beer he’s ordering for the friend he brought with him.

“That’s it, stuff this guy full before he avoids me for an entire year again,” Yuta barks out a grating laugh as he slings an arm around his friend, a fire elemental named Chan. “This bastard went all the way to the southern cities to train just like Kazuha’s doing right now and he didn’t even bother telling me!”

You’ve met Chan a few times in the past. He and Yuta are drinking buddies, but you’ve stopped seeing him around the time Joshua started hanging out here. Even if you barely knew the guy, it’s nice seeing another familiar face.

“I’m not going anywhere anytime soon, calm down,” he laughs before downing another mug and wiping the moisture off his lips. “Although I did come here with an ulterior motive.”

Yuta hums. “Came here to chase skirts or something? Sorry to say but half the women in this place are wrapped around Seokminnie’s finger. You can’t even seduce ‘em if you tried.”

Chan snorts before punching Yuta’s chest playfully and for a moment, your eyes catch on something around his pinky. A ring? No… It looks like a small blue flower tied around the base.

“Don’t lump me in with you,” Chan complains, snapping you out of your momentary fixation. “I meant to ask Kazuha to be my plus one for this ball that our town’s royal mage is telling me to attend. But then you said your sister is all the way up north.”

“Zuha’s way too young for you,” Yuta points out with a huff before gesturing to you. “How about Ice Queen over here? She could probably use the time to unwind and meet more people.”

You bring down his drink in front of him with a glare. “Don’t just go volunteering other people without their consent, douchebag.”

Yuta snickers before taking his first sip, and though you refuse to let it show, you’re somewhat glad that he’s back to grating on your nerves as usual. “Okay, fine. I’ll let Chan do all the asking then.”

You’re convinced that Chan wouldn’t really jump the gun right away and ask you just like Yuta suggested. After all, even if you do have mutual friends, you barely know each other. It would be wise to invite someone he’s more acquainted with for an important function like a ball.

But he continues to surprise you by bringing his hands together and bowing his head—pleading almost desperately. “Please be my plus one! I don’t know who else to ask and I’ve only got tonight left to find someone.”

“Tonight?” you echo disbelievingly.

Chan lifts his head to nod sullenly. “The ball I was asked to attend is the one that’s going to be held at the royal castle tomorrow. You know, for the first public appearance of Prince Joshua’s fiancée?”

Silence hangs between the three of you, eclipsing the rowdy background noise from the other patrons. You don’t dare look in Yuta’s direction—afraid that he realized how attending an event where Joshua would be present would affect you.

Your first instinct is to decline. After all, you’ve done so well for the past few months. Joshua is but a dream that you can’t attain, and it’s growing easier to accept that with each day you don’t see him. He’s better off on his designated pedestal in the royal castle—dazzling, but completely far out of reach. You’re afraid that seeing him again would make everything you worked so hard for crumble to dust in a second.

But another part of you—the more foolish one, unfortunately—longs to see him again. His kind smile. His gallant posture. Everything.

So of course it’s a no-brainer when you say:

“Yes. I’d love to come with you.”

Okay, maybe agreeing to be Chan’s plus one is more of a hassle than it’s worth.

First of all, you had a dress to worry about. Where the hell can you get a dress that’s worthy of being worn to an important royal celebration at such short notice? It’s not like you had the extra cash to spare for something like this either.

The next is the dawning realization that you’re going to be surrounded by nobles for the entire night. While Chan reassured that he himself is a commoner too, and that other commoners were also invited here and there, it doesn’t change the fact that you don’t have enough exposure to high society to know how to act.

“Yuta’s told me a lot about you already, and I know for a fact that you’ll do just fine,” your partner reassures with a smile. “Just…don’t accidentally freeze anyone or their drinks and you’ll be alright.”

…The revelation that Yuta talks about you to Chan aside, his words do prove to be somewhat reassuring. He also promised to pay for your dress, makeup and overall styling at his superior’s expense (“Are you sure he even knows you’re spending his money?” “Relax, I’ve got it all under control.”) All you had to do was show up tomorrow at the inn he’s renting a room a few hours before the party starts.

However, these pre-celebration anxieties pale in comparison to the nerve-wracking jitters that intermittently seize you in the ball itself.

You’ve never been to the castle before—much less, the massive ballroom inside. Seraphia is a kingdom with centuries’ worth of history written into the land and part of that history is the countless celebrations held by the royals of old. You can’t help but feel jarringly out of place somewhere like this. In a room full of lavishly dressed guests—majority of which are nobles—you’re pathetically inferior.

It’s kind of comforting to know that Chan might just be feeling the same way.

“Gods, this place is making me so nervous,” he admits as he leads you to the table serving refreshments and champagne by the arm. “Parties were never really my thing.”

“That makes two of us then,” you chuckle softly, hoping the other guests in the vicinity won’t overhear. “Do you know anyone else here?

Chan shakes his head. “Right now? No. But she’ll come out later though.”

Now that piques your curiosity. “She?”

Your partner’s face immediately flushes at the realization that he just ratted himself out. He sighs, carding his fingers through his hair as he lets his eyes drift towards the orchestra in the far end of the room.

“You know the prince’s fiancèe, right? Hyejin?” he asks and you nod. “Well, we…live in the same town. We grew up together, she’s my best friend. But I haven’t seen her in a long time since she’s been confined at the castle for her assimilation and I trained for a few months in the southern cities.”

Chan absentmindedly twists the floral ring around his finger as he says the words. A nervous tic, maybe? There’s also a twinge of fondness in his voice that you vaguely recognize. It’s the same way your mother talks about your father. The same way Jihoon talks about his music.

The same way Joshua talks about the things he does for Seraphia.

You don’t voice out your suspicions, aware that though you and Chan have developed some level of camaraderie as people who both feel out of place here, you’re not close enough to pry about his friendship with Hyejin.

Besides, the ball is already beginning before you can even have a chance to contemplate doing so.

The royal family comes out one by one. First, the king and queen themselves—greeted by the loudest of applause by their loving people. You don’t see them very often, but it’s clear that the years are starting to catch up to them. Though the royal couple still looks stunning as always, no one can deny the graying streaks in their hair and the waning youthfulness on their faces.

It’s no wonder everyone is anticipating Joshua and Hyejin’s wedding.

The next is the eldest prince, Jeonghan. He emerges from the doors of the ballroom with confidence oozing in every stride. You’re certain that he's well aware that he’s easily the most controversial person inside this room, but this man just does not give a single damn. You find yourself admiring the way he carries himself—so similar to the way Joshua does, but not at the same time.

And then…there’s the stars of the night.

You haven’t been counting time between now and the night you last saw Joshua, but it’s as if the months flit past you in mere seconds. If you haven’t realized just how much you actually missed him earlier, you do now.

Joshua’s hair is longer, dipping in swift curls just above his eyes. He’s radiant—almost blinding in the way he smiles and waves at the crowd with his fiancèe in his arm.

His fiancèe… Hyejin.

She’s easily the most gorgeous woman you’ve laid your eyes on today. There’s a hint of shyness on her face as she periodically nods at those they pass by to congratulate them, but there’s also a firm conviction that would reassure any onlooker that she knows exactly who she is and what she came here for.

It’s one thing to overhear the rumors and gossip circulating around the city, but it’s another to actually see the intended couple in the flesh.

However, in the middle of the queen’s opening speech, you notice that Chan hasn’t said a single word to you since the ceremony started. You glance at him from the corner of your eye, intent on asking if he’s alright. But then you realize that his gaze is completely trained on Hyejin—completely enraptured by the sight of her.

The way his hand tightens around the flute of his champagne glass isn’t lost on you, but you don’t comment on that either.

Next thing you know, the opening dance led by the next royal couple is starting, and you force yourself to watch despite how much it physically makes your heart ache.

Joshua and Hyejin are in perfect sync. Like two people who have known each other all their lives. They move fluidly to the music of the orchestra, eyes never leaving each other as they traverse the dance floor.

You vaguely remember hearing that Hyejin also practices plant magic, like Joshua used to years ago. It’s no wonder how in tune they are to each other’s movements. Their elemental affinities already make them such a perfect match.

Time passes by far too slowly and you’d almost consider watching the love of your life dancing so gleefully with someone who isn’t you another form of torture. Once the first song ends and all the other guests prepare for the exchange dances, you can’t help but breathe out a sigh in relief.

Surprisingly enough, the idea of dancing with nobles you don’t even know doesn’t make you as nervous as you thought it would. With how much drunken dancing you’ve done with Seokmin and Yuta in the pub, you figure that this wouldn’t be that much different. You just have to keep yourself from stepping on anyone’s toes, probably.

Of course, Chan takes up the title of being your first partner—doing a ceremonial bow that has you rolling your eyes at him before melting into a fit of laughter. You try to push down the visceral emotions that coiled in your chest only minutes before and let yourself enjoy the privilege of being invited to such an exclusive event.

You’ll never have Joshua—this, you already know. And you’re not about to waste any more of your time moping over something that’s already set in stone.

The dances pass by in a blur. You get passed around to several gentlemen who are actually more amicable than you thought nobles would be. The partners get switched up so quickly, you barely get their names before parting ways. But you do recall dancing with a fellow who calls himself Haechan for two reasons:

The first is that he just would not stop boasting about the things his parents have done in their town, the affluence his family affords him, and the “fact” that women back home trip on their skirts chasing after him.

The second is, while you’re busy awkwardly nodding and smiling at Haechan’s endless monologue, you spot Chan in the crowd of dancing guests—hand in hand with Hyejin herself.

If you thought she and Joshua were in sync, it’s as if Hyejin shares the same heartbeat with Chan with how they move together. They’re completely enraptured in each other. Despite the obvious banter going on between the two of them mid-dance, it’s as if they’re in their own little world—not a single care given to the people around them.

You don’t know if you should feel happy for Chan or not because if your hunch is right…

Then that just means he’ll be forced to watch the love of his life marry someone else in a few months’ time—just like yourself.

By the grace of the gods, you’re finally liberated from Haechan’s clutches and into your next partner’s arms. But right after curtsying before him, you nearly trip on your own feet when you realize who it is.

“Fancy seeing you here,” Joshua greets, repeating the same words he told you back in Wonwoo’s shop a lifetime ago with the same smile that you see even in your dreams.

You can’t find the words. You can’t even muster up the courage to say hello or anything remotely similar. The words stick to your throat like cotton, despite the fact that you’ve spent countless nights imagining what you would say to the prince in the off chance that you’d get to speak to him again.

Thankfully, Joshua is more attentive than you are and immediately gets into position once the next song starts playing.

You try not to think about how warm the hand resting on your hip is; how perfectly your fingers seem to slot between the spaces his other hand the two of you sway to the beat. Because the more you think about it, the more you’ll remember.

The more you’ll remember, the more you’ll hope.

And you’ve known for the longest time that hope is a fickle, fickle thing.

“Can I ask how you wound up on our guestlist, dear Ice Queen?”

Your magic doesn’t react very kindly to Joshua’s teasing, and you immediately feel the flesh of your fingers drop several degrees. Joshua seems to notice the sudden chill and laughs before twirling you around.

“I’m here as someone’s plus one, nothing else,” you explain with a sigh before forcibly retracting your magic. The last thing you want to do is accidentally kill the most influential person in this room next to the king and queen. “But…you could even say I missed you a little, Your Highness.”

What the hell?

You have to fight the urge to cover your mouth with your hand because of the utter shamelessness in your words. But to your relief, Joshua seems to take it in stride—his handsome smile never ceasing.

“Forgive me, things have been…very hectic as of late,” he confesses with a sigh. “I didn’t mean to just stop showing up like I did but believe it or not, I’ve had very little free time since the engagement.”

You shake your head at that. “Why are you apologizing? You don’t owe us any of your time, you know. We’re happy to have served you before, and we’ll still be happy to do that even if it takes you fifty years to drop by again.”

“Now don’t be so obtuse! I’ll make sure to pay you a visit once things start mellowing out again. That’s a promise.”

Pay you a visit…

You know he means everyone back in the pub as a whole. But that stupidly foolish voice in your head insists that you should let yourself dream sometimes—no matter how impossible.

“Don’t go make promises you can’t keep or everyone will be very disappointed, Prince Joshua,” you chuckle, willing any halfwitted thoughts away.

The prince shakes his head before reaching up to tuck a loose tuft of hair behind your ear. You aren’t able to school your surprise into something less pronounced in time, and you’re sure as hell he saw the way your eyes widened at the gesture.

“One thing you should know about me is that I always keep my word,” he murmurs so softly, you barely catch the words over the music. “Always.”

…Why is he doing this?

Why is he unknowingly stringing you along with a false sense of hope? Why is he acting so outlandishly affectionate in the company of a hundred other nobles who might see what he was doing? With his fiancèe in the same room, no less?

But for once—for goddamn once—you give in to the foolish part of your brain. To all the false hopes. To all the delusions.

Just for one night, you let yourself believe that perhaps, if things were a little different, if you’d been just a little braver when you had the chance…

Joshua would’ve loved you back.

The song comes to an end and so does your brief daydream of a happy ever after. You spot Hyejin scurrying through the crowd in search of her fiancè in no time, and you lean closer to Joshua’s ear to let him know.

It shouldn’t surprise you how his face lights up. How quickly he turns around to see his intended for himself. And you shouldn’t feel as heartbroken as you do when all he does in farewell is give you a minute nod before reuniting with his future wife.

As you stand there, amidst a sea of nobles in a place where you don’t belong, the reality check you so direly needed finally dawns on you.

You’ll never have Joshua. Not in a million years.

But you damn wish you could.

As the head bartender of the pub for a few years now, you like to think that both your regulars and the new faces you see around have come to trust you easily. Aside from being able to mix and serve a spectrum of drinks off the menu, it’s implicit in your job description to be an empath. Sure, you can always just serve them their drinks and go about your day, but that transactional type of behavior doesn’t make people keep coming back for more, it’s your hospitable personality.

From puppy crushes to marriages ruined by third parties, you’ve been on the receiving end of countless stories from countless customers. While you’re no expert when it comes to love, it still pays to lend a willing ear to someone who direly needs it. Talking to people about their problems is easy; all you have to do is offer some comfort at the right time.

So why are you suddenly so clueless when it comes to Prince Joshua’s predicament?

You thought you wouldn’t be seeing him again after that rainy night. That he’d drift out of your orbit like he usually does just when your heart starts to delude you into thinking he’s finally within reach again. But it’s as if the past year hadn’t happened at all, and the next thing you know, he’s back to visiting the pub disguised as a commoner all over again.

You’re no fool, though. Despite the fact that Joshua seems to have settled back into his habit of observing others whilst nursing a glass of his favorite Oak Walker, things are far from the way they were back then.

You often catch him lost in thought, staring so deeply into space that you’re almost always compelled to ask if he’s alright. But you don’t because you know he’s not alright and you intend to respect that by giving him the time and space he needs.

But while you busy yourself concocting the orders of other patrons, a sinister voice in the back of your head whispers the foulest things. How the gods finally gave you another chance to have the prince to yourself. How the stars have surely aligned for Joshua’s engagement to come to an end just when you thought all hope was lost.

You ignore all these ridiculous thoughts. You’ve already accepted a long time ago that the prince would never see you the way he saw Hyejin. And you’re not so wicked that you’d take advantage of his state of vulnerability for your own gain.

After all, you’re his friend before anything else. If the day ever comes that Joshua would confide his sorrows in you, you’d tell him the words you think he needs to hear and offer just enough solace like you have with your past heartbroken patrons.

Nothing more, nothing less.

Except he doesn’t do that. Joshua doesn’t say a single word about how and why he and Hyejin split ways. Instead, he comes into the pub one night and the look on his face makes you feel like something just…changed. The lines on his face make you think that he still carries that ever-present sadness in his heart, but tonight, you notice that he’s at least learned to smile again.

It’s not the pearly white grin that he’d crack whenever Yuta makes a tactless joke, or the one he showed the day he ran into you in Wonwoo’s shop. But the fact that Joshua still has it in him to make the corners of his mouth turn up into a gentle smile reassures you that maybe you haven’t lost him to his grief just yet.

“I heard that there’s a group of traveling thespians visiting the capital for a while,” Joshua tells you while you’re in the middle of mixing a gin and tonic. “My brother adores the shows put up by theater troupes all over the continent so he got himself tickets to the show.”

“Okay,” you start, shooting him a curious look to let him keep going.

He hesitates for a sliver of a moment, which is odd because Joshua is someone who’s always sure of himself. Almost awkwardly, he clears his throat—averting his eyes before continuing.

“But it just so happens that Jeonghan had to rush over to Ancarra to deal with a little problem. He won’t be in the capital once the troupe arrives, so he gave me the tickets instead.” Joshua pauses and chews the inside of his cheek. Then, he quietly adds:

“Would you like to accompany me to the show?”

If you were the same person you were a year ago, you probably would’ve dropped the glasses you were just about to hand to Sungchan. Thankfully, that doesn’t happen and all your younger coworker does is ask if you’re okay before you reassure him that it’s nothing he should worry about.

When Sungchan is out of earshot, you glance at Joshua once more. “Come again?”

“I asked if you wanted to go to the show with me,” he says point-blank, the smile on his face widening ever-so slightly. “Of course, there’s absolutely no pressure for you to accept. It’s just a waste of another ticket if I don’t bring anyone else with me to enjoy it.”

…There it is again—that traitorous flare of hope sizzling in your chest.

How could you not feel it when Joshua makes it sound like, if you ever refuse, he won’t even try asking any of his other friends and acquaintances to go with him? To even consider anyone else other than you as a worthwhile companion to a show that costs an arm and a leg just to see?

You should hate it; this push and pull you constantly suffer through when it comes to him. The most logical choice is to refuse. But, though you’re loath to admit it…

You’re nothing if not a hopeless fool for him.

“Sure thing,” you tell him with a face as smooth as butter. “What time does the show start?”

The traveling theater troupe is one of the best you’ve seen. Contrary to your expectations, the tickets didn’t, in fact, cost an arm and a leg. Their group is apparently very well known as thespians who make their tickets affordable for all walks of life. The audience wasn’t confined to a bunch of nobles with extra cash to burn, and the sight of common people like you being able to occupy seats in the capital’s amphitheater warmed your heart more than it should.

Their play is about two would-be lovers who met in their childhood only to meet again eventually as adults. A typical romance between a commoner and a noblewoman that you’ve heard about in every cheap pocketbook that Kazuha likes to read in her spare time. But despite how cliché the story is, the actors easily brought forth a spectrum of emotions that you wouldn’t be able to fully invest yourself in from reading books alone.

When the male lead was about to die in his lover’s arms, you were already in tears—not even having the hindsight to wipe the moisture off your face as you’re too entranced with the show. But the sound of your companion’s low laughter snaps you out of the momentary surge in emotions.

You whip your head to face Joshua with a puzzled look, scrambling to dab away the tears in your eyes before asking, “W-What’s so funny?”

The prince shakes his head beneath the hood of his cloak—still disguised for his own safety—before reaching a hand out to gently scrape his knuckles across your damp cheek. “Nothing. I just didn’t think you’d feel so strongly about the story. I was afraid you were growing bored, actually.”

It takes you a moment to process what he was saying to you because your brain is hyper focused on the way his skin feels against yours. Joshua doesn’t just wipe the tears away. He even pats the side of your face with unfamiliar tenderness before retracting his hand back to his side.

Your heart feels like it’s slowly climbing up your throat before finding its place in the roof of your mouth. It would be easier to down five consecutive shots of vodka than fight back the urge to reach for his hand again, but you force yourself to hold your ground. You have to.

“I’m glad to see that you’re enjoying,” he murmurs, brown eyes riveting back to the actors on stage. “Jeonghan spoke very highly of this particular troupe, so I wouldn’t really question the quality of their performances. But seeing them for myself is…an experience.”

“It really is,” you can’t help but murmur in agreement.

(Un)fortunately for you, that’s not the end of it.

The prince’s invitations grow even more frequent as the weeks pass by. If he’d just asked you to share a few drinks together at the pub after hours, you would’ve been able to handle it just fine. Your workplace is comfortable enough for you to forget the fact that Joshua is someone you’re still in the process of getting rid of your feelings for. But for him to ask if you’re free to accompany him in places other than the pub? In broad daylight, no less?

You’re not sure how to feel as a platoon of knights flank you on both sides while Joshua leads you back to an orphanage. He’s telling you about how this place has been under close watch by his brother for years now and that Jeonghan asked him to check on the kids living here from time to time. While you’re glad that he’s back to busying himself with some princely duties, you can’t help but notice the way the knights would glance at you every so often.

You can almost picture the question going through their heads: how could Prince Joshua spend time with another woman when it hasn’t been that long since the engagement was called off? The mere thought of being perceived as some sort of replacement for Hyejin makes you sick to your stomach. You feel the familiar dregs of frost tingling across the skin of your palms, a chill running down the length of your spine.

That’s another reason why you don’t want yourself to pursue Joshua. You don’t want to be branded as an opportunist of some sort—both by the general public and yourself.

But once you finally make it inside, Joshua instructs the knights to stand by at the courtyard, not wanting to frighten the children by their presence. You’re convinced that at least one of them would protest, but they all receive the prince’s order with surprising obedience. Being freed from their intent stares definitely makes things easier for you.

The orphanage isn’t as massive as you initially thought. Joshua further explains that the director is the daughter of one of Seraphia’s many royal mages. After her father’s passing, she repurposed their family manor into a home for children abandoned by their parents—giving them a more favorable future than they’d otherwise have in the streets.

From what you can tell, the orphans residing here have been raised with love and care when you meet them. What’s more is that many of the children can already practice their own magic, and it’s for that reason that the royal family—particularly, Jeonghan—is keeping tabs on this place.

“They’re the next generation of mages that will make the kingdom prosper one day,” Joshua says, quoting his brother. “I don’t stop by here very often, but even I can tell that the mentors Jeonghan hired have been very effective with their teachings.”

As if on cue, two of the children shuffle forward with meek strides. The girl introduces herself as Eri and the boy, Iseul. They flash you and Joshua vibrant smiles before placing a string of vibrant wisterias around both of your necks.

“Prince Joshua, you’re back!” Iseul giggles with a toothy grin. “But…where’s the other miss? Weren’t you going to marry her?”

The abrupt question makes Eri scowl at Iseul in disbelief. “I-Iseul, don’t be rude!”

“But I was just curious,” the younger boy sulks.

An uneasy feeling settles in your chest at their words. That could only mean Joshua has brought his ex-fiancée here before, right? Then again, why wouldn’t he? If Hyejin is as benevolent as the newspaper clippings from back then suggested, she wouldn’t be past visiting orphans at least once in her life.

“The miss from back then is fine. She’s already with the person she truly loves,” Joshua explains with a kind smile, crouching down to ruffle Iseul’s hair. “Don’t worry about her. I’m still making sure she’s safe even if we’re no longer in contact.”

The prince’s quiet admission has your eyes widening a fraction. You can’t tell if he’s simply feeding the children a little lie to pacify them, but that’s much too specific a coverup to not have some truth veiled behind it.

As Eri and Iseul scurry back to where the other children are playing, you let your thoughts scatter for a moment. You distinctly recall the time you last went to the royal ball as Chan’s plus one; that brief moment where you saw him and Joshua’s ex-fiancée dancing together as if they’re the ones who were engaged.

Once the pieces finally click, you have to stifle a gasp.

She’s already with the person she truly loves

It all makes sense now.

“Eri made these herself, you know.”

You decide to think of Hyejin and Chan’s relationship some other time, glancing at Joshua inquisitively before perusing the fragrant flowers around your neck. “Really? How?”

“Using the same magic you saw me use all those years ago,” the prince explains with a small smile. “Eri always hesitated with her conjuring magic the last time I was here, but it seems like she’s growing more comfortable with using it day by day.”

“How about you?”

“Hm? What do you mean?”

You swallow thickly, unsure if you’re even in the position to ask him this. “I mean… Aren’t you comfortable with using your own magic? Just like Eri is?”

The silence that settles between the two of you is eclipsed by the gleeful noises from the children playing in the wide living area. Joshua’s face is unreadable as he considers your question, and you fear that you might’ve touched up on something that you definitely shouldn’t have.

“...Well, if I’m being honest,” he begins, “I’m not. I haven’t used my magic in years, and I’m afraid that even little Eri is better at conjuring flowers than I’ll ever be.”

You snort. “That’s not true, and you know it.”

“It still doesn’t change the fact that I don’t really have any use for it,” Joshua sighs before raking his fingers through his hair. “Me and my brother grew up being taught that we can always just rely on the royal mages if we end up needing to use magic.”

“But don’t you miss it though?” you wonder. “My magic isn’t the most…convenient, but I can’t imagine living without it. It’s…part of me, you know? I just don’t like thinking about how you’re repressing something that’s clearly a part of you, too.”

Never in a million lifetimes did you think that you’d be speaking about your magic in a positive light. The ice has always been difficult to deal with—especially in times when your emotions are all over the place. But despite that, you wouldn’t be who you are today if it weren’t for your magic.

“I…” Joshua’s voice trails off as he stares at you with wide eyes. “I never really thought about it that way.”

“That’s because you’re too busy being the perfect prince for the people,” you scoff before lightly punching him in the shoulder. “Think about yourself for once, will you?”

“Myself, huh…”

He falls into another bout of silence as if what you said reminded him of something. You don’t pry this time though, letting your eyes drift back to the children instead. But part of you hopes that he’ll take your words into consideration and start being less strict with himself.

Once you both leave the orphanage and Joshua dismisses the other knights, he asks if you want to stop by the Jeon Flower Emporium before he walks you home—an invitation that you’re flattered to receive, yes, but…

“You don’t have to walk me home,” you insist frantically. “I don’t want to take up more of your time than I already did. Besides, I’m familiar with this part of the city, and it isn’t even dusk—”

“What sort of gentleman would I be if I just let the person I invited out for the day go home by herself?” Joshua chuckles softly before flashing you a reassuring smile. “I promise it’s no big deal. It’s not like I have anything of dire consequence to attend to these days.”

Those last few words have you thinking for a moment. You have noticed that Joshua has a lot more free time to spend wandering around the capital than you’re used to. It makes you wonder if the royal family is giving him much needed time to recuperate from what happened with his engagement.

The knowledge puts you at ease somewhat. Joshua definitely deserves a break after everything he’s been through for the past few weeks.

“Fine,” you relent. “My mother’s been asking me to check on Wonwoo anyways.”

Your childhood friend is in the middle of closing up the shop when you and Joshua arrive. But when Wonwoo’s bespectacled gaze catches sight of the two of you, he immediately stops what he’s doing to meet you by the entrance.

“It’s been a while since you stopped by. Both of you,” Wonwoo comments with a surprised look.

Joshua laughs. “Well, things have been a little—no, very busy. I’m sure you’ve heard the news.”

Your eyes nearly bug out of their sockets at the nonchalant manner that Joshua addresses the proverbial elephant in the room. All this time, you kept yourself from encroaching on the topic out of fear that it would be a sore spot for him. Yet here he is, bringing it up just like he would the weather.

Wonwoo, the most polite person you know, meets your eyes as if asking for silent confirmation. Is this really okay? He seems to wonder and all you can muster is an awkward smile of your own.

“I…have heard the news,” he says, clearing his throat. “I’m very sorry for what happened, Your Highness.”

The prince shakes his head. “Please, don’t be. We mutually decided on it for both our sakes. Although that aside, I know you’re already closing up, but is it alright to place an impromptu order?”

You and Wonwoo have the same expressions on your face when you both stare at Joshua incredulously. The prince looks one hundred percent serious about his request though, making you wonder why on earth he’d need to purchase flowers all of a sudden.

“Um, of course.” Wonwoo recovers from the stupor fairly quickly before dusting his hands on his apron. “What would you like, Your Highness?”

For the first time since you’ve met him, the smile on Joshua’s face is something that borders on…mischievous. It’s a look you’ve seen Jeonghan wear in the rare chance you do get to meet the eldest prince in person. But you can’t even begin to wonder what would prompt Joshua to flash Wonwoo the same expression.

Although you do find out shortly after.

“I refuse.”

“Why? You seemed to like it the last time I gave you flowers.”

“Flower. It was just a single daisy, not a whole bouquet!”

“Is it so bad if I want to give something as a token of appreciation? For letting me drag you all over the place even if it’s inconvenient?”

“Oh, so you are aware it’s inconvenient for me?”

“Hence the reason I’m expressing my utmost gratitude.”

Of all the ways you could’ve imagined today turning out, being gifted a bouquet that Wonwoo put together by Prince Joshua is the last thing that would come to mind. Your old friend didn’t seem to have any problems with catering to the sudden request and happily agreed to prepare it while you and Joshua waited in front of the shop.

“You don’t get it, Your Highness,” you sigh exasperatedly, embarrassment prickling the back of your neck. “You can’t just buy flowers for everyone you’re grateful for! Especially after… Ah, whatever! People might get the wrong idea, you know!”

Joshua pouts a little—very unprincely of him, but still disarmingly adorable. “While I take the citizens’ feelings to heart, I don’t see how my personal gifts to you are any of their business.”

Your jaw nearly drops at his admission. Is he being real with you right now?

The next moment, you feel several eyes on your form again—boring their judgemental stares deep into your skin until you can feel the oncoming chill of your magic reacting to them. You let your eyes dart around for a moment, and just like Joshua’s knights from earlier, you spot several passers-by sneaking glances at you and Joshua.

Given that the trip to the orphanage was an official royal visit, the prince chose to forego his usual disguises. Now here he is, out in the open—bickering with some commoner who’s definitely not the woman he was engaged to just a month ago.

Fuck. You can already see your name plastered on next week’s Daily Tribune.

“An order of daisies to go?”

Wonwoo’s reappearance manages to salvage you from your spiraling train of thought. Joshua steps in before you can even utter another protest, handing him the payment for his purchase before cradling the flowers in his arms.

“Thank you, Wonwoo,” the prince utters with a small nod. “We’ll be heading off now. Take care on your way home.”

Your bespectacled friend doesn’t respond right away. His gaze is trained on the beautiful bunch of daisies he expertly put together. You think he was simply admiring his own handiwork, but then Wonwoo’s eyes flit to Joshua, and then to you.

His lips curl into a smile that implies he might know something you don’t.

“Of course,” he chuckles. “Thank you as well for your patronage.”

Despite your repeated objections, Joshua ends up walking you home anyways.

He may be the kingdom’s most esteemed gentleman, but the prince will insist on something he wants to the ends of the earth if he can help it. It’s a good thing that Wonwoo’s shop isn’t very far from your own house, saving you the sheer embarrassment from having to carry a bouquet of flowers with Prince Joshua himself by your side.

“Guess that concludes another eventful day,” he chuckles as you fumble for the keys. “A day well spent indeed.”

You let yourself glare at him for a moment before jamming the key to the front door in the hole. “You’re going to be the death of me one of these days. I genuinely wonder why I’m such a good friend to you.”

Before you can even twist the key to turn the locks, the prince suddenly takes a hold of the hand not holding the bouquet of daisies. You startle at the contact, but before you can even call him out for surprising you like that, Joshua brings the back of your hand up for a kiss.

You can barely feel the brush of his lips on your skin—much too mesmerized by how those honey brown eyes never leave your face as he does it. The gesture lasts for barely a moment, but it feels like lifetimes have unspooled before he peels himself away and lets your hand fall limply by your side.

“I wonder that, too,” he murmurs, the ghost of a smile hovering across his face. “I’ll be going now. Good night, Ice Queen.”

Joshua doesn’t even give you any room to respond. The prince merely straightens himself out, directs another curt nod your way before turning on his heel.

Later in the evening, you lay in bed with Joshua’s flowers sitting in a vase by your nightstand. Even as you stare at the ceiling of your room, the faint fragrance still manages to waft to your nose.

That night, you dream of a time you think you’ll never forget. Of rushing rivers and a runaway pup.

Of a young prince and flowers given to the brave.

“You’re what?”

That’s Kazuha’s first reaction when you brought her up to speed about everything that transpired while she was gone. As much as you want to celebrate her return and the success of her training in the northern regions, going months without anyone to directly confide in does things to your brain.

“Shhh,” you hiss, glancing around the bar frantically in case there were any eavesdroppers. Then, you lean closer, lowering your voice when you say, “We’ve been…going out quite frequently for the past two months. ”

She gasps as if that was the most scandalous thing she’s heard all day before taking a moment to take a sip of her ale. “Going out…like, romantically? You’re going out with the same person you’ve been mooning over for the past two years?”

“No!” you immediately retort. “I-I have not been mooning over Prince Joshua! And I wouldn’t say that the nature of our…get-togethers is romantic! He’s just comfortable around me is all.”

Kazuha rolls her eyes. “Please. Yuta has been keeping in touch with me through letters. You know my older brother is an even bigger gossip-monger than our regulars in this place. He says you always look at the prince as if he hung all the stars in the sky!”

“Could you please not broadcast that where everyone can hear?” you plead, resisting the urge to pour yourself a mug of beer while you’re still on the clock. “And is there anything else that Yuta told you that I need to know?”

You partly mean that in jest, but a bigger part of you is worried that Yuta must’ve told his sister about…the fooling around you did with him several months prior. But when Kazuha says, “Not much. He just goes on and on about his new job and asks how training is going,” you let yourself breathe out a sigh in relief.

“Speaking of Yuta though, he hasn’t visited in a while.” You let yourself think about when exactly Yuta last dropped by the pub, but you’re drawing blanks. Not even Shotaro could give you an answer when you flagged him down from bussing tables to ask.

But all thoughts of your arch-nemesis are promptly forgotten when Kazuha diverts the topic back to your…interesting ventures with Prince Joshua.

“Aren’t you happy?” she asks. “You finally have a chance to get with the man you so obviously harbor feelings for. I might be a little idiotic for not noticing sooner, but it’s better late than never to be supportive, right?”

While your first instinct would have been to deny any and all allegations about having feelings for Joshua, her question has you thinking.

Ever since Joshua bought you that bouquet from Wonwoo’s, his behavior has changed drastically. You understand why Kazuha would jump to the conclusion that your excursions have some romantic undertone to them from hearing the stories alone because the way the prince has been treating you lately has you second-guessing everything you’ve ever known.

He always buys you thoughtful presents no matter how much you insist he doesn’t have to. He always lingers long beyond closing time in the pub just to make sure you get home safely. Even the way he looks at you has changed. There’s always this…fondness in his eyes that wasn’t always there.

If one of your patrons came up to you and told you a similar story, you would’ve told them that the other person involved is definitely head over heels in love. But…this is Joshua. Prince Joshua. The man you’ve long resigned yourself to never being more than friends with.

The man you can never have.

Speaking of the devil, the doors to the pub are pushed wide open by two newcomers. You’re not surprised by the first one—Joshua always makes time to visit you at work at least once or twice a week. But you’re very much taken off guard by the identity of his companion.

“So this is the place my little brother has been boasting about non-stop,” Prince Jeonghan comments with an impressed look, eyes roving across the crowd that’s just as stunned with their entrance as you are. Even Seokmin paused from his live performance just to gawk at him. “Well? We’re no strangers here, everyone. Just keep going about your night like always.”

Your patrons all glance at each other warily before doing just as the eldest prince told them to. The usual din of the pub fades back into your ears in no time, but that doesn’t make you any less surprised with their visit.

“Hello,” Joshua greets with a sigh as he slides in his usual seat at the bar, just next to Kazuha. “Forgive me. Jeonghan has been pestering me about where I’ve been sneaking off to all the time and it just so happens that he decided to tail me tonight.”

Jeonghan snorts before taking the vacant seat on Kazuha’s right, the brothers flanking the poor girl on both sides. “As much as I’m pleased to know that Shua is no longer distraught over what happened with our dear Hyejin, you can’t blame me for being curious about the reason why.”

“Brother,” the younger prince groans.

Of course, Jeonghan all but ignores Joshua’s pleas to be discreet. “Can you whip us up your best drinks off the menu? One of the knights told me about this pub’s famous Oak Walker in passing.”

“Coming right up, Your Highness,” Kazuha quickly responds, hopping out of her seat before taking her rightful place behind the bar. Before you can even protest, she shushes you with a finger to your lips.

“Go entertain our very high-profile guests,” she whispers. “I’ll take care of the rest with Sungchan and Shotaro. Just keep them occupied enough, okay?”

You can only nod in defeat.

So that’s how you end up occupying the stool that your coworker was sitting on five minutes prior. You still feel bad for unwittingly making Kazuha work on her first night back in the capital, but you have to admit that it’s nice seeing her back in action again. She expertly maneuvers around the bar like she hasn’t been gone a day.

“What brings you here, Your Highness?” You decide to break the ice before your nerves can get the best of you once Kazuha serves the three of you one glass of Oak Walker each. “Prince Joshua mentioned that you weren’t a fan of drinking in crowded places, so it’s…really surprising to see you here.”

Jeonghan chuckles and props his elbow on the wooden counter—resting his chin on the palm of his hand.

“Like I said, I was simply curious about Shua’s trysts. Here I thought he was getting frisky with some maiden in the middle of the night, but…maybe I’m not all too far off after all.”

His tacky response earns him another groan from Joshua. “Jeonghan, I only agreed to bring you here tonight because you promised not to stir things up.”

“I’m not stirring things up! I’m simply stating things as I see them,” the older prince laughs before taking his first sip. “Oh. The knights weren’t lying. This is some finely aged whiskey you’ve got here.”

“It’s a family recipe that’s been passed on for decades,” Kazuha quips behind the bar with a proud smile. “Although our head bartender over here has done most of the tweaks and improvements to the mix. You’ve got her to thank for the astounding flavor.”

Jeonghan nods before helping himself to another gulp. “I’d expect no less for someone who’s caught Joshua’s eye.”

“Jeonghan.”

…Caught Joshua’s eye? In what way, exactly?

“Alright, alright. I’ll tone it down with the teasing,” Jeonghan finally relents with a simper before turning to you. “So you’re the infamous Ice Queen, eh? Do I want to know what you’ve done in the past to warrant such an…interesting nickname?”

“That’s just something one of the other staff members calls her in jest,” Joshua sighs before halving the contents of his glass in one go. The way he slams it back down on the counter would’ve made you laugh, but you’re too high strung because of Jeonghan’s presence to even crack a grin.

“Oh, my dear Shua, I wasn’t talking to you. Didn’t you learn in our many etiquette classes that it’s rude to talk over other people?” Jeonghan tuts. “Anyway, Miss Ice Queen, care to give us a quick display of your magic?”

You blink for a moment before letting your eyes catch Joshua’s. The younger prince flashes you an apologetic smile, mouthing the words I’m sorry before you turn to Jeonghan with a deep breath.

As much as he intimidates the living hell out of you, you’re not very keen with the way he’s pushing your friend’s buttons so…

“Sure thing,” you say, trying your best to offer up a convincing enough smile…

Before wrapping a hand around Jeonghan’s glass and turning his drink into a cylinder of amber ice.

Joshua lets out an unbecoming snort to your left and Jeonghan’s jaw drops at your blatant display of petulance. You force yourself to hold the smug look on your face in an attempt at getting your point across. No one gets to mess with Joshua on your watch, even his older brother.

“I like you, Ice Queen,” Jeonghan cackles as he turns his glass upside down—the frozen drink staying solidly in place. “But please tell me this comes with a complimentary replacement? I might not look like it but I’m actually parched.”

It’s the first time in literal months that the pub started to feel like home again. Not only did Kazuha return from being out of town for months, but you found a new friend in Prince Jeonghan himself. The eldest prince took it upon himself to pay for everyone’s orders for tonight—earning the immense favor of your patrons. Jeonghan even bought a few rounds of drinks for Sungchan, Shotaro, Jihoon, and Seokmin once closing time came around.

The only thing missing from the equation is…Yuta.

You wonder where he is right now.

“Well, I best head out now,” Jeonghan announces just when Shotaro finished serving Jeonghan’s treat to everyone who stayed behind. “Unlike my little brother, our parents don’t know me as some fiend who has his share of nightly ventures. I best head back to the castle before anyone notices I’m gone for too long.”

Joshua snorts into his drink—a tinge of scarlet on the tips of his ears indicating some degree of inebriation. “You’re just worried that the princess will kill you if you leave her alone in her room for even a minute longer.”

Now that makes you pause.

Princess? As far as you know, Seraphia hasn’t had a princess since the queen got hailed as…well, the queen. But you’re a little too tipsy to make sense of the logic behind the royal family tree.

“Must you single me out the same way I do with you, Shua?” Jeonghan sighs before making his way to the door. “You kids enjoy the rest of your drinks. Make sure to get home safely, all of you.”

“You’re only two years older,” Joshua points out.

“Old enough to buy the entire pub several rounds of drinks.”

“With the king and queen’s money?”

“Hey! I’ll have you know that the royal family’s money comes from the people’s hard-earned taxes!” Jeonghan balks. “I’m simply giving back to our beloved constituents.”

“Gods above, just leave!” Jihoon bemoans in his seat from where he nurses a cup of coffee instead. “And I thought Yuta and Kazuha’s bickering couldn’t get any worse.”

Jeonghan lets out one last chuckle before swinging the door to the pub open—letting the late autumn air breeze inside the pub.

“Ah, there’s nothing more that I love than people who aren’t afraid to tell me off,” he chuckles before letting the door click shut behind him.

After the last round, Jihoon and Seokmin hail a carriage in the late night streets as their neighborhood is a bit of a ways away from the pub. Sungchan and Shotaro both promise that they’d bring Kazuha safe and sound back to her father’s house, despite the fact that the young servers can’t even walk straight. And Joshua takes up the mantle of the one who walks you home like always.

If you’d been just a bit more sober, you would’ve noticed the way Seokmin and Jihoon shared A Look when Joshua announced that he’ll be chaperoning you. The way Kazuha’s lips were upturned into a mischievous yet supportive smile. But you don’t take note of any of this—simply looping your arms around the prince’s waist as he keeps you from stumbling into the pavement.

“Gods, it’s been a while since I’ve gotten drunk on someone else’s expense,” you hiccup all while trying to blink the spots out of your vision. “Is Jeonghan always that generous to people he’s just met? I don’t get why he’s so unpopular if that’s the case.”

Joshua chuckles as he untangles your arms around his waist so he can heft one over his shoulder to maneuver you around more comfortably. “No. He only does that for people he likes. Which aren’t a lot. He’s a very good judge of character though.”

“Did he know, then?”

“About what?”

“About Hyejin loving someone else?”

Despite the silence that settles into the night, the sound of your footsteps beating across the cobblestone rings loudly in your ears. Your mind doesn’t quite process just how long it takes for Joshua to respond. You simply find yourself attentively listening when he answers with:

“Yes. He did know. It’s hard to keep things from someone like Jeonghan.”

You snort. “Even your little visits to the pub?”

“Even those,” Joshua agrees with a small smile.

After walking in silence for a few minutes more, the cold evening air starts to seep through your clothes—making your body tremble with an involuntary shiver. You frown, unsure why the chill is affecting you the way it is now. You’re fully aware that winter is coming to Seraphia very soon, but the onset of it never once made you feel this off-kilter.

Oh, well. Maybe it’s just the alcohol.

“Say, Your Highness…”

Joshua glances at you just as you both round a street corner. “What?”

You struggle to keep your wits about you as you stare at his handsome face. Though he’s marginally less intoxicated than you are, there’s still a tinge of redness speckled across his cheeks. Cute.

“Why are you such a good prince?” you wonder. “Back then, you were always doing the things Jeonghan’s supposed to be doing… It’s like you’re the older brother.”

“That’s not true,” Joshua responds quickly as he helps you step over a pothole in the road. “He’s…someone who likes working behind the scenes. But I can’t deny that Jeonghan sometimes likes to jeopardize his own reputation for reasons even I don’t completely understand.”

“But why are you working so hard in the front lines anyway?”

Another pause. Your eyes briefly catch on the way Joshua’s throat bobs.

“Because I want to be king,” he murmurs.

You arch an eyebrow, guessing that it is natural for someone like Joshua to want that when he’s technically second in line for the crown. But…there’s something about the way he says it that doesn’t seem as sincere as you thought the words should sound like.

“Okay. Why do you want to be king?”

He glances at you again, rightfully confused, but the look melts into soft, gentle laughter. The sound reverberates deep in his chest and it somehow warms you up amidst the cool evening air.

“Do you want the answer I tell my parents and the rest of the royal court or the actual answer?”

Rolling your eyes, you playfully bump your knee against his leg. “Of course I want the actual answer, idiotic prince.”

“Alright,” he relents surprisingly quickly. “Well…it’s because I want to keep helping more people. If I have the power and authority of a king, I’d be able to do that on a much larger scale than what I’m currently capable of now.”

Your face scrunches up at his line of reasoning. “But…you can still help a lot of people even if you’re not king, right?”

“Yes, but I’d have a better chance at helping everyone if I was—”

You let your body move before your thoughts could completely catch up to what Joshua is trying to say. One of your fingers rests against the plush give of the prince’s lips as you silence him, supporting your wobbly stance by placing your other hand on his shoulder to steady yourself.

“Prince Joshua, not even the gods can save everyone,” you slur, shaking your head vigorously. “You’re not a child anymore, so I’m sure you know that very well. And don’t lie. I’ve been hanging out with you long enough to know that you don’t like the idea of becoming king at all. You just want to help people ‘cause you’ve got a heart of gold. That’s it.”

…Maybe you shouldn’t be making baseless assumptions about what Joshua wants and doesn’t want to do with his life, but you’re sick of it. Sick of seeing him willingly put the expectations of other people on his shoulders.

Sick of seeing him think of everyone but himself.

Then you do something you never would’ve had the guts to do without the liquid courage coursing through your system. You pull Joshua down into a tight embrace that causes him to make a strangled noise in the back of his throat.

“I told you to stop being so selfless, didn’t I?” you grumble, burying your face in the crook of his neck as your own face starts to heat up. You have a hunch that it’s probably not because of the alcohol.

“Let yourself live a little. No thinking about other people. No altruistic agendas. Just enjoy your life just like you’ve been doing for the past few months.”

When you lift your head back to meet his eyes, there’s a look in Joshua’s honey browns that you don’t think you’ve ever seen before.

It dawns on you just how close you are—bodies pressed together amidst the oncoming winter chill. His breath comes out a little unevenly, gaze smoldering with an emotion you can’t quite pin down.

Never in your wildest dreams could you have dreamed of the prince who’s the epitome of the perfect gentleman looking at you the way you’ve been looking at him for years now.

Like he wants something he shouldn’t.

You don’t know how it happens, why it happens but you somehow end up with your back pressed against the wall of an alley right next to the bookshop you often pass by on your way home. Holding you in place is none other than the prince himself.

Your brain is seemingly absent when you feel the heat of Joshua’s mouth enveloping yours as his fingers dig into your spine—pressing you closer even if there’s no longer any distance to separate the both of you.

His touch rakes so impossibly hot against your clothes that you can’t find it in your heart to care when your embarrassing mewls are muffled by his lips. It doesn’t help that Joshua has his knee pressed between your thighs, effectively inching your legs apart as he kisses the life out of you underneath the glow of an old streetlamp.

The prince pulls away for only a moment—pressing his forehead against yours as earnest eyes bore into your soul. Joshua’s breath fans across your face in a way that makes your skin tingle with corrosive desire and you fear that you won’t be able to go back from this anymore. Not when he’s given you a taste of something you’ve been unknowingly craving for the longest time.

“You don’t know what you do to me,” he whispers. “You haven’t the slightest clue.”

Part of you wants to tell him that you do. That he demonstrated just exactly what you do to him. But there’s not enough space in your frazzled mind to tease the man you’re so hopelessly in love with.

Instead, you pull him in for another mind-numbing kiss, fingers tangled in his rich brown tresses as Joshua devours you like he’s been starving his whole life.

All this time, you felt as if you’re walking on thin ice with him—careful to not break the surface. The friendship you’ve cultivated was easy. It offered you the security of his constant presence with no room for uncertainty.

But right here, in a dingy alley with no one but the stars that Joshua himself hung in the sky to bear witness, you realize it’s so much easier to just let yourself drown in him.

It’s filthy. It’s beautiful.

It’s all you’ve ever wanted and more.

But you should have known it was too good to be true.

Just as all dreams tend to, the one you shared with Joshua ended in the morning with a raging migraine making itself at home deep in your skull.

The sheets are cold, so is the stale air that lingers inside your bedroom. When you stare at the spot your nighttime lover had occupied when you both tumbled into blissful slumber, you find it empty. No sign of him anywhere inside your house. No notes left explaining where he went without waking you.

You’re all alone with a trail of clothes littering your bedroom floor. None of them belonging to a certain honey-eyed prince.

You let yourself wallow in denial for a while—thinking that the reason Joshua left in a rush was because he had to reassure those back at the royal castle that he hadn’t been abducted in the middle of the night.

He’d come around in a few days with a string of apologies prepared in advance. Maybe you’ll even spot him rushing into the pub later tonight—another one of his many gifts in hand as he expresses his utmost contrition.

But the prince doesn’t show up that night. Or the night after that. And the night after that.

The days eventually bleed into weeks and you hear absolutely nothing from Joshua the entire time.

You’re convinced that you managed to play it off as casually as you can. Either that or the rest of the pub’s staff is just good at not asking questions they have no business asking. The way that Kazuha occasionally looks at you with a worried look on her face when she thinks you don’t notice proves that the case is definitely the latter.

It’s not a big deal. This is just one of the many scenarios you’ve heard a few patrons tell you about—being left in the morning after by someone they’ve given their entire world the previous night. You always tell them that it’ll get easier in time.

But you don’t want it to get easier in time. You’ve wasted enough of that—investing years’ worth of love into a man who’ll never truly be there to reciprocate your feelings the way you want him to. It stings like a million arrows to the chest, like being stampeded by an army of knights riding into war.

Loving Prince Joshua was never easy, but this is the first time it ever truly hurt.

“Hey.”

You’re in the middle of cleaning a bunch of glasses when your ears perk up at a familiar voice you haven’t heard in a while.

Yuta takes a seat in front of the bar with his usual mirth startlingly absent. Given how long since he last showed up around these parts, you at least expected him to have that stupid smirk plastered across his face when he finally drops by again.

But all he greets you with is an uncharacteristically serious look that reminds you of the time he propositioned you for a kiss.

“Hey yourself,” you greet him back. “Kazuha’s not here, by the way. She’s dealing with some extra requirements needed to confirm her graduation from the Academy—”

“I know that,” Yuta deadpans. “She’s the one who asked me to come here.”

You make a face at that. “Why?”

Your old coworker rolls his eyes. “Can’t you at least pretend to be happy to see me again?”

Annoyed, you conjure up a tiny blunt icicle to launch into his face, but Yuta evades it swiftly with a scowl. “Wow, now you’ve resorted to attacking me, too?”

“That’s my way of saying I missed you, moron,” you grit out before bringing out two empty mugs from the shelves. “So what are you having tonight, Mister Swordsmith?”

While you and Yuta catch up, you ask Shotaro to man the bar in the meantime—a request that the younger man is nervous but happy to accept. That gives you enough time to finally speak to the one person you never thought you’d ever want to catch up with in the first place, given your consistent track record for pissing each other off.

But then again, Yuta has always been full of surprises.

“What?”

Rage colors the tone of his voice when he asks, but you know perfectly well that Yuta heard every word you just said. You feel the pricks of shame in your chest as you attempt to drown it with a generous gulp of beer. The you from a year ago would’ve been mortified at the idea of spilling your most recent tryst with the man you’ve loved for more than a decade, but it is what it is.

Nonetheless, you repeat yourself anyway. “I…slept with the prince, and he was gone when morning came. Haven’t heard from him in almost a month and I’m not about to go looking for him either.”

You absentmindedly glide your finger along the rim of your glass, trying not to wallow in self-pity as Yuta processes the words in his head. But the reverie lasts for only a few seconds before your friend lets out a long, deep sigh.

“You know you deserve better than that, right?”

You shrug. “Maybe I do, maybe I don’t. But what’s the use of knowing what I deserve when I can’t really do anything about it anymore?”

“I knew you were an idiot, Ice Queen, but I didn’t think it was this bad,” Yuta makes another exasperated noise before taking another swig of his drink.

Now it was your turn to scowl. “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”

Yuta leans forward on the table, making sure his eyes are leveled with yours as he stares you down with a look that would’ve intimidated everyone else but you.

“You always think so little of yourself. Just because that guy is some hotshot royal, doesn’t mean he can get to walk all over your feelings like that. You’ve gotta learn how to assert yourself better,” he lectures. “Try acting around Prince Charming the way you act with me, sometimes. You were never afraid to set things straight whenever my jokes go a little too far, when you’re tired of me sleeping around with a bunch of our customers.

“So what in the nine hells is stopping you from marching up to the castle and demanding a proper conversation from him? You’ve been hung up on the guy for fuck knows how long. The least he can do is give you a goddamn explanation for leaving you all alone that day.”

You’ve never liked Yuta’s very crass way of talking, but right now, the harshness of his words is probably what you needed all along. For a few minutes, you let the ambiance of the pub taper your restlessness into clarity—internalizing everything Yuta just told you the best you could.

“But…what if he doesn’t want anything to do with me anymore?” you mumble. “If he really cared about me still, wouldn’t he have reached out by now?”

“That’s because men are idiots, Ice Queen. I thought you already knew that,” he points out before folding his arms across his chest. “The dumbass probably thinks he’s doing you a favor by giving you space and waiting for you to come to him when you’re ready. But his silence is pretty much doing the exact opposite, am I right?”

You nod sullenly.

“God. I’d electrocute that fucker if only the price I had to pay wasn’t death by the gallows,” he grumbles. “Anyway, the point still stands. If he won’t come to you, then just go to Prince Charming and let him know that you’re not gonna tolerate his shit anymore.”

For a moment, you let yourself chuckle at how strongly he feels about this. “Gee, Yuta. You’re awfully supportive for someone who’s made it his life’s purpose to mess with me every chance he gets.”

“I can be serious when I have to be,” he bites back. “Now promise me that you’ll talk to him and set things straight first thing tomorrow. You’ve made Kazuha worried enough.”

“Are you saying you’re not worried about me?” you tease.

“Watch it or I won’t show up here for another year.”

After wrapping up your conversation with Yuta, you excuse yourself for a moment to get some fresh air outside. He waves you away with a dismissive air to his posture before finishing the rest of his drink.

Then, Sungchan walks up to him with a sigh.

“You’re so weird,” he mumbles as he clears out your empty glass. “What idiot would just let the person he loves flutter off to someone else like that?”

Yuta simpers with a shake of his head, willing away the pain that lances through his chest at the verbal reminder.

“An idiot like me, maybe.”

You’re going to talk to Joshua.

You will. You promised yourself the moment Yuta talked you into it the previous night. But it’s as if your body doesn't want to let you feel the relief of certainty just yet.

When you wake up the following morning, your limbs feel heavier than the kegs back in the pub when they’re newly refilled. The headache you’re suffering from isn’t so different from the one you had the morning after Joshua left you all alone, but you’re fairly certain this isn’t because of a nasty hangover.

Kazuha drops by your place when you don’t show up at the pub only to see that you haven’t climbed out of bed after getting yourself a glass of water earlier in the day. She immediately realizes that you were running a high fever—one that was probably brought about by the change in seasons.

“I’m going to get you some medicine and food, okay?” she sighs, smoothing a cool washcloth across your forehead. “Is there anything else you want me to get for you outside?”

You snuggle yourself further beneath your blankets, letting your body soak in the heat as you shiver from the cold air of the room.

Ironic how an ice elemental gets sick first thing in the winter.

“Mother’s soup…” you whisper sleepily. “That always makes me feel better.”

That’s the last thing you remember saying before drifting back into slumber.

Life at the castle has been uptight for as long as Joshua can remember.

The royal court has always been strict with upholding tradition and the ways of old. Where other children would dream about getting to grow up in the lavish halls and high ceilings of the castle, Joshua has always longed to be liberated from it.

Time dedicated solely for leisure was scarce. He and Jeonghan were immediately taught to put their royal studies and etiquette classes first before anything else. His older brother never stood by these regulations though—always the first to rebel against the rules the elders and their parents have set.

Joshua admired Jeonghan’s courage. Yet he knows he can never really emulate it for himself.

So he decided to be the one who follows the royal court’s every whim. The obedient prince that everyone would come to deem as perfect with how compliant he is to what everyone tells him to do.

But then came the day when the king of Ancarra sent a present for his brother. Their parents told both of them it was a gift of goodwill, and that Jeonghan absolutely cannot refuse even if the elders of the royal court were against it.

Jeonghan pulled him to the side once the king and queen were out of earshot—saying that the ‘gift’ is nothing but an avenue to secure his betrothal to the Ancarran princess. Joshua didn’t know what that meant at the time, being barely ten years old, but he simply went with it.

He always agrees with what he’s told after all.

To his surprise, this so-called gift is actually a puppy.

Joshua always wanted one. A knight once told him about a loyal dog waiting for him at home, which is why he rarely took any overtime shifts at the castle. The youngest prince has wanted something to look forward to going home to ever since he heard the tale.

As Jeonghan let his new pet explore the castle gardens, he didn’t miss the way Joshua’s eyes lingered ever-so-fondly on the small puppy. It’s for that reason that he took it upon himself to gather the hapless animal in his arms, flashing his little brother a warm smile.

“How about we take care of him together?” Jeonghan asked. “This pup is yours as much as he is mine.”

That was the first time Jeonghan saw Joshua’s eyes light up so brightly, it’s nearly blinding. And it’s also the moment he decided that he’d do virtually anything to preserve that sparkle in his little brother’s eyes.

The youngest prince did an excellent job at helping raise the puppy. It took a while for him and Jeonghan to give it a name, but it came to them one summer afternoon right after they finished giving him a bath.

“Hwan,” Jeonghan mused before laughing as the pup shook itself to dry off. “Let’s call him Hwan.”

When Joshua asked him what the name meant, Jeonghan simply patted his head—saying that he’ll know when he’s older—before continuing to towel dry their newly named pup.

Hwan brought color to their once-stale life at the castle. The servants adored him and the knights would even play with him if they ever caught sight of the little rascal bounding down the hallways.

About two months after Hwan arrived in the castle, Joshua took him out for a quick walk all by himself. No nannies. No guards. Just him and the little pup on a leash.

Jeonghan reassured that Joshua could do what he wanted as long as he didn’t wander off too far, and knowing that his older brother was there to cover for him made Joshua’s first real attempt at rebellion easier to execute.

The castle wasn’t located in some remote area or anything like that. Joshua quickly spotted a bunch of children his age playing amongst themselves just a short distance from the gates.

He had intended to maintain a short distance so as to not disturb them, but when one of the kids spotted Hwan, the rest of them came flocking over like a bunch of doves.

That’s how he ended up befriending several children that would make the royal court’s elders frown at his actions. It’s not that he’s forbidden to interact with them, but those crones always did like maintaining the class divide between nobles and commoners.

But, having been so distracted by the game they were playing, Joshua failed to realize that Hwan was no longer tied to the tree he’d last left him in.

The young prince frantically broke the news to the other kids, saying that Jeonghan was going to kill him if he found out he’d lost their dog. But one of them told him that a girl whose name he didn’t quite catch already went after Hwan before they could notice he was gone.

“She chased after him in the forest I think.”

Joshua didn’t need any further explanations. He immediately bolted to the direction of the forest without another thought.

To his relief, it didn’t take long for him to find the person who went after Hwan in his stead. The young prince spotted you by the riverbank that bypasses a clearing in the forest—crouched low as you attempted to reach for something he couldn’t quite see.

But when Joshua shuffled just a bit closer, he realized that Hwan somehow wound up in the middle of the stream—shivering on top of a rock that didn’t hold promises of holding out for very long.

“Come on, it’s okay,” he heard you coo. “I’ll catch you. I promise.”

The prince couldn’t help but interfere. “H-Hey! That’s dangerous. You could fall in!”

Startled, you glance behind you with an annoyed look. “Stop shouting! The little puppy’s already scared as it is. And doesn’t he belong to you?”

“Yes, but we can just call the knights so they can get him for us,” he reasons. “Don’t lean so close into the river! You might fall in!”

Your lips spread into a frown. “But…he’s family, isn’t he? You can’t just leave him like that. What if he falls in the water while we waste our time calling the knights?”

He wanted to insist that, despite that being a very real possibility, it’s still much safer to call on an adult. That’s what he was taught, after all.

But Joshua was unable to find the words. Instead, he watched in complete silence as you attempted to reach Hwan without falling into the rapid stream.

You managed to save his pup in the end—not without tumbling into the water, of course.

The sight of you plunging into the stream once your balance was tipped made Joshua fall into a frenzied panic. He nearly ran back to the castle to call the guards for real, but you quickly broke through the surface of the water and started swimming against the current and towards the rock Hwan was shivering on.

There you were five minutes later, soaked from head to toe as you cradled the poor puppy in your arms. You were so invested in scolding Joshua for being very irresponsible with his pets that you never quite noticed the way he looked at you with adoration in his eyes.

It was the first time he’s seen someone do something so idiotic and brave and selfless with his own two eyes.

Joshua has heard stories about warriors who fight in wars for the sake of peace. But he never would have thought that his first encounter with someone else’s bona fide bravery would be in the form of a ten year-old that wanted to save a stranger’s puppy from drowning in a river.

Then, he recalled reading about daisies in an old picture book his mother gifted. How those frail little flowers could bloom even in the bloodiest of battlefields. As you droned on and on about hammering the importance of family into his head, Joshua pictured a lone daisy in his mind’s eye.

He wanted to give one to you. To show that he’s grateful for what you’ve done. But there weren’t any flowers blooming in this part of the forest—much less, a daisy.

Yet, when he lifted one of his hands up, there it was.

A frail little flower for a brave little girl.

Joshua doesn’t know what to expect when he drops by the pub after almost a month of avoiding it. He knows that the chances of you having him thrown out have increased exponentially since the last time he was here, but he couldn’t take it anymore.

The night he spent at your house, doing things he never even once pictured himself doing with his ex-fiancèe, he was at cloud nine. It was the first time he’d let himself loose; selfishly thought about what he wanted at that moment with not a single thought spared for other people but you.

Yet when the sun broke through the horizon the next day, the gravity of his carelessness dawned on him. He’d just jeopardized a friendship he’d been so careful to preserve. You were one of the very few people he could fully trust and lean on, but he decided to throw that all away for a night of debauchery.

The prince felt disgusted with himself. He didn’t deserve to see how you dozed so peacefully in the comfort of your bedroom. How you smiled in your sleep when he brushed a few strands of hair off your face.

So instead of apologizing to you like he definitely should have…

He ran away like a coward.

Now here he is, back to the place where it all started.

He hoped to see you behind the bar like usual, mixing drinks with a hospitable smile as you entertained the evening’s patrons. But the prince is surprised to see a person he hasn’t gotten a glimpse of in a long, long while.

“You’ve got some nerve showing your face here,” Yuta snarls as he shoots Joshua down with a glare. “What do you want?”

Joshua breathes evenly through his nose and out through his mouth.

He’s got this.

“I wanted to talk to her,” he explains simply. “Do you know where she is?”

He fully expects Yuta to not give him the answer as easily as he’d like him to. Joshua isn’t blind. He’s seen the way he looks at you. Nor is he stupid because the prince is well aware that Yuta resorts to playful banter to cover up the fact that he’s enamored by you.

Takes one to know one, he guesses.

But to Joshua’s utter surprise, the owner’s son doesn’t tell him to get lost or find someone else to bother.

“She’s sick,” he mutters. “That one hasn’t been able to come to work since yesterday. Maybe you would’ve known that sooner if you actually gave two shits about her.”

Joshua takes all his snarky comments in stride, knowing full well that isn’t even half of what he deserves after what he did. But the fact that you’re sick rightfully concerns him. Were you alright? Did you have someone looking after you?

“Her mother’s soup.”

The prince glances at Yuta quizzically. “I’m sorry?”

It’s as though Yuta’s face has a grimace perpetually etched onto the surface, but Joshua doesn’t let it faze him. “She always asks us to bring her mother’s soup when she’s sick. If you want to make it up to her, you better do that sooner than later.”

“Where does her mother live?” Joshua wastes no time asking. “I can go to her right away.”

An unreadable expression crosses Yuta’s face, as if assessing if Joshua’s worth telling it to after what he did to you. In the end, the owner’s son merely sighs—carding his fingers through his mussed hair.

“Follow me, Prince Charming.”

Meeting the parents is something that never really fazed Joshua before. Then again, he was already acquainted with Hyejin’s father years before he proposed to her. Meeting your parents is something that makes the prince want to jump to the bottom of an ocean, never to be seen again.

Because how could he possibly face the people who raised you after what he did? How thick-skinned could he be to introduce himself when he chose to be a coward when he should’ve been brave?

But your mother was a dear. Your father was rightfully apprehensive of his presence, prince or not, but they both welcomed him into their home—the place where you grew up—with open arms.

“That child. She never mentioned being friends with the prince, of all people,” your mother stresses with a sigh as she prepares her signature soup. “Did you know that she’s admired you for a long time now? It’s mellowed down over the years, but she always did have a soft spot for you.”

…You’ve admired him for a long time?

Joshua has only been acquainted with you for roughly two years. Perhaps the admiration your mother speaks of is the same way citizens would admire royals who actually do their job. Given his reputation among the citizens of Seraphia, it’s no surprise to be on the receiving end of something like that.

But when she tells Joshua she wants to show him something in the garden while they wait for the soup to simmer, he’s startled by a groundbreaking revelation.

The youngest prince hasn’t used his magic in years—this much still rings true to this day. But it’s just like you’ve said: his magic is a part of him. It’s something he can’t completely erase no matter how much he tries to suppress it.

So when Joshua sees a potted daisy sitting idly in your mother’s garden, his magic instantly reacts.

He’s felt the pulling sensation before. After his official coronation, when he created a bouquet of roses for his mother to express his gratitude, she kept the flowers on display in the great hall of the castle. It remained there until it inevitably wilted, despite the fact that royals were heavily discouraged from using their magic.

Joshua always felt as if the roses he fashioned with his own magic called out to him every time he passed by. As if the flowers were alive and happy to see the person who created them.

The little daisy sitting right in front of him calls out to Joshua the exact same way.

“I’m not sure if you remember, but you were the one who gave that to her,” your mother chuckles.

What?

“This is the one I gave to her a few months ago?” he mutters. “She…kept it all this time?”

Your mother shakes her head. “No, Your Highness. That one wilted fairly quickly. This little daisy…is the flower you made and gave to my daughter when she was ten years old. It perseveres to this day because of an old friend’s preservation magic. Amazing, isn’t it?”

Preservation magic…?

Moreover, it’s something he created with his own magic? One he apparently gifted to you when you were only ten years old?

Joshua takes a moment to jog his memory, parses through a catalog of names and faces he’s come to acquaint himself with over the years.

Then, it hits him.

He remembers his first dog, Hwan and how he nearly lost him to a rushing river all those years ago. If it weren’t for the girl who was courageous enough to swim across the stream to save him, Joshua was certain it would’ve been the end of it.

And that girl—the one who made him decide that he loves people who are brave; people who are selfless…

It was you.

But why haven’t you said a single word about it?

“That child… She’s much too sentimental for her own good, you know? I’m afraid that sentimentality could be a detriment to her one day, but—” your mother startles all of a sudden. “Y-Your Highness?”

Joshua doesn’t usually cry. Hell, he doesn’t make it a habit to wear his emotions on his sleeve. As a political figure that thousands of people across the kingdom are looking up to, he’s expected to embody poise and composure at all times.

But for the first time in his life, the youngest prince lets the tears fall in front of a mother that isn’t even his own.

When you get up to answer the door, you fully expect it to be Kazuha—carrying more food than you know what to do with and another bottle of medicine even if the last one she bought is yet to run out.

You love her, really. She’s almost like a second mother with how much she fusses over you when you’re feeling under the weather. Thanks to her tender love and care, you’re more or less feeling much better than you were yesterday. Maybe you can even show up to work by tomorrow, too.

“Zuha, you really don’t have to keep checking on me anymore. I’m al…right?”

Except it isn’t your coworker who greets you.

It’s Joshua, looking just as handsome as the last time you saw him—if not more. But before you can question if the person in front of you is just a mirage, you notice that he’s wearing familiar looking kitchen mitts and holding an even more familiar cooking pot by the handles.

“Hello,” the prince greets sheepishly. “May I come in?”

You stare at him for a few seconds longer, wondering why on earth he has your mother’s kitchen paraphernalia before cracking the door open wider.

When have you ever said no to Joshua?

An air of awkwardness hangs above you like clouds over your heads as Joshua serves you some of your mother’s beloved soup. You insisted that you were well enough to do it yourself, but the prince was having none of it—making you sit down on the dining table as he concentrated on not having anything spill off the ladle as he transferred the soup into a bowl.

He somehow manages to mess even that up though, splashing a few drops all over the polished wood with a silent curse. You can’t help but stifle a laugh. This is a man who obviously hasn’t served other people in ways outside of his duties as a royal prince.

But then you suddenly remember how you felt when you woke up that day—nothing but empty sheets and a heavy heart to keep you company.

“Why are you here?”

The words come out so quietly, you doubt Joshua would’ve heard them if it wasn’t so quiet inside your house. But his eyes slowly rise to meet yours before he walks over to you and places a bowl of warm soup in front of you on the table.

Then, Joshua flashes you a shy smile. “Let’s…talk for a while, yes?”

Both of you help yourselves to generous servings of your mother’s cooking for a while. The rich flavor easily reinvigorates you more than you thought it would, and you find yourself even slightly missing home again. Maybe you should pay your parents a much-needed visit.

“So…how have you been?”

Right. You still have much to discuss with the prince himself.

“Do you want the answer I tell everyone else or the actual answer?” you muse, quoting something similar he asked you a while ago. From the way the tips of Joshua’s ears redden at your words, he recalls them just as vividly.

He scoops another spoonful of soup into his mouth before letting out a quiet sigh. “The actual answer.”

You manage a tight-lipped smile. “Miserable then.”

Joshua nods once, the grip he has on his borrowed spoon tightening ever-so slightly. He opens his mouth a few times, as if wanting to say something but being unable to form the words.

“How about you, Your Highness?” you ask. “How have you been?”

He frowns. “You…you don’t have to keep calling me that.”

“Why?” Cocking an eyebrow, you help yourself to more of your mother’s soup without breaking eye contact. “You’re the prince and I’m just some commoner you got tired of playing with. It would be improper for me to address you as anything else.”

You know you’re speaking somewhat out of turn. It’s obvious that he paid you a visit in the same house he left you in to make amends, but you were sick of playing the understanding, lovesick fool. Pricks of anger start to dot your chest the longer you think about that day, and suddenly Yuta’s suggestion sounds so much more appealing.

All these months Joshua spent stringing you along with your heart in the palm of his hand, only for him to leave it for dead…

You were done taking his shit.

“I know that a million apologies won’t make up for what I did, but I’ll try anyway,” he murmurs. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry for just leaving without an explanation. Waking up next to you was easily the happiest moment of my life and I’d want nothing more than to experience it again. I…didn’t know what came over me.”

You let out a mirthless chuckle. “You’re lucky that you saw me first thing in the morning, that you had the happiest moment in your life. When I woke up it felt like I never even mattered to you.”

Your heart feels like it’s on the verge of exploding with how much emotions courses through it in a single second. Joshua remains rightfully silent, head lowered as he takes in your words.

So you decide to say even more.

“Not that I expect you to remember, but I’ve loved you since we were children. I was perfectly fine with the fact that you’ll never love me back—even when we became friends, even when you caved that evening and kissed me.”

You pause for a moment, letting yourself breathe despite your throat starting to constrict with each passing second. The feeling of your magic creeping up in chilly dregs across your fingertips doesn’t make the entire ordeal any easier.

“I was going to let the fact that you just left like that slide because I was so convinced that you’d come around the next day to give me an explanation. That you’d at least give me some clarity because I deserve that in the least, don’t I?

“But you didn’t. You never told me why you suddenly thought I wasn’t worth clearing things up with. And now you’re here, saying that waking up next to me was the happiest moment of your life? Don’t you think you’ve already hurt me enough?”

“Because I was afraid,” Joshua interjects, much louder than you expected. “All my life, I’ve done what everyone tells me to do because I’m the perfect prince, the obedient one, the only one they can control.”

You grimace. “How is that my problem—”

“It isn’t. It never was and it never will be your problem. It shouldn’t have to be…” He sighs, dragging a palm over his face as he stares up at the ceiling. “You deserve someone who loves you without fear, without reservations. Someone who wakes up next to you everyday and won’t bolt right out of the door because he suddenly remembered he’s the prince of the kingdom.

“I want…so badly to be that person for you. But that morning, I stared at the person who’s the embodiment of everything I shouldn’t want.”

You bark out a harsh-sounding laugh. “Someone you shouldn’t want? Because I’m a commoner? In case you’re forgetting, only a year ago, you were supposed to marry a commoner, too. Why is it that when it comes to me, you suddenly don’t want to take that risk? Why do you have to continue lying to my face when you can just tell me outright that you don’t fucking love me—”

“I’ve loved you more in the past few months than I ever loved Hyejin in the entire decade I’ve known her,” Joshua rasps and you don’t miss the way his voice nearly cracks. “It fucking scares me because I’ve never loved someone this deeply. Never wanted something for myself as much as I want you.

“I love you so much that I was ready to give everything up. Becoming king and helping others just like I dreamed—all of that didn’t matter that morning. When I realized just how tight of a hold you actually have on me, I was fucking terrified.”

For the first time tonight, you’re at a loss for words. You stare at Joshua with trembling lips, wondering a million times if you heard him right.

He…loves you?

“Ironic how the girl who taught me what bravery looks like when we were children is the same one I was too much of a coward to face when I realized how I felt about her.”

Wait a minute—

“What do you mean?” you whisper incredulously.

Joshua breathes in sharply before the tension in his shoulders visibly ebbs away. He fishes something out of his pocket for a few seconds…

Only to show you the small, frail daisy being kept alive with preservation magic.

“Why didn’t you say anything?” he murmurs, twisting the stem in his fingers. “If I’d known you were the one who saved Hwan back then—”

“What, you would’ve let yourself love me sooner?” you ask sharply. “Well, I’ll have you know Your Highness, that I didn’t want to come off as some gold-digging fiend who throws herself at you. Nor do I want you to love me because you think of me as some sort of symbol for bravery or whatever bullshit noble reasoning you’ve got going for yourself.

“I wanted you to love me as I am now. Is that so hard to understand?”

You don’t tell him that you were just as cowardly as he was. That you’ve been sticking by your mother’s words since she imparted them.

You and him are on opposite ends.

Joshua is a prince and you’re nothing but a lowly bartender. That’s the thought that helped keep your love for him at bay for the longest time.

But what do you do when the same prince who was always out of reach lays all his feelings bare? What do you do when you find out that he isn’t completely unreachable after all?

The room remains painfully silent for about three stuttering heartbeats before Joshua lays the daisy that started everything next to his bowl of cold soup. The prince gets up from his seat and you watch in rapt attention as he goes down on one knee.

“What are you…?”

Before you can even complete that sentence, Joshua does something he hasn’t in years.

You don’t think you can forget how he conjured a bouquet of roses for the queen during his coronation. That was the second and last time you’ve ever seen him use his magic.

Yet now, the youngest prince is weaving the most beautiful bunch of daisies out of thin air. The blossoms look even more vibrant than the bouquet he’d purchased for you at Wonwoo’s. You don’t even realize you were holding your breath until Joshua pushes the flowers closer to your face and takes your hand in his.

You hate how he’s able to bring warmth to your cold, cold hands even after everything.

“I know we got off on a very, very rough start, and I don’t deserve your forgiveness just yet but…” He breathes and it’s the first time you’ve ever heard him so nervous. “Can we try this again? Not as the girl who saved Hwan and as the prince you’ve loved for years, but just as you and me in the present.”

“No.”

Joshua blinks. “S-Sorry?”

“I said no, Joshua,” you huff, crossing your arms together as you push away his flowers. “You think I’m going to make things easy for you after what you did? I might be catastrophically in love with you, but I’m done being a fool. You have to earn my forgiveness first before I let you—mmph!”

You’re too slow to stop him when Joshua tosses the flowers on the table and lunges in for a kiss.

“Y-You idiotic prince,” you gasp into his mouth, glaring straight into his honeyed eyes. “Kissing me without my consent isn’t going to make me forgive you any faster!”

“You called me Joshua.” He grins, and if that isn’t the most gorgeous smile you’ve ever seen, you don’t know what is. “You never call me by my name.”

Joshua pulls you in for another. And another. And another. You don’t have it in you to resist him and keep up the vengeful façade when the love of your life has finally deigned to return your feelings for him.

Maybe you’ll just punish him some other time.

For now, you let yourself bask in this small bubble of genuine happiness.

“An Oak Walker, please. I heard that the king himself considers that as his favorite.”

You let out a quiet laugh as you list down the pub’s most recent order. “I wouldn’t say it’s his favorite—”

“Oh, it definitely is.”

At the sound of your husband’s rebuttal, you find yourself rolling your eyes. Joshua brings out a glass from the shelves before filling both of them with a fresh batch of whiskey straight from the kegs. The idiotic prince doesn’t even flinch when you glare at him.

The customer you’re serving—an Ancarran diplomat named Soonyoung—cackles in his seat. He’s a face you’re starting to see more frequently around the pub, and Joshua told you beforehand that it’s because he’s the new queen’s closest friend. The man spends a lot more time bar-hopping in the capital of Seraphia than actually doing his job in his own homeland.

“Always a treat to see the king’s little brother being a menace to his wife,” Soonyoung comments as Joshua serves him his drink. “No wonder I haven’t seen you around the castle much. You’re too busy pushing her buttons, aren’t you?”

“Hmm, not really. That’s the owner’s job,” Joshua replies with a smile. “I only like to tease her from time to time.”

“Why are we suddenly talking about the owner?”

As if on cue, Yuta eases himself into the conversation with one brow raised. It’s always surreal to think about how he took up the title of the pub’s owner after their father’s passing. But it’s still nice to have one of your dear friends around even after so many years.

It’s been roughly six years since your marriage with Joshua. Lots of things have changed since then, but there are others that remained the same.

For one, Kazuha is no longer part of the bar’s regular employee roster. Right after graduating from the Academy, she was immediately scouted to be a Stormwatcher by the royal family itself. She spends much of her time in the castle, studying various weather patterns prevalent in the kingdom and other neighboring lands, but she still visits from time to time.

Seokmin and Jihoon still hold the occasional performance at the pub whenever they’re in the city, but they’ve long decided to join a traveling group of musicians to spread their songs to places other than Seraphia. No matter how long they’re gone for though, you always make sure to reserve at least two glasses in case they come by.

Speaking of singers, Sungchan and Shotaro have been promoted from the pub’s usual waiters to regular performers. Both of them turned out to have hidden talents for singing, and your patrons were more than happy to enjoy the shows they put on every night.

Wonwoo, your ever-present childhood friend has decided to hire more staff to manage the store before enrolling back into the Academy again. He’s always had the same kind of magic as his mother and he told you that he wanted to invest some time into cultivating it just as she had when she was still alive. Of course, you were supportive of the decision—promising that you’ll still buy flowers from his shop even if your husband can make an entire garden for you with a snap of his fingers.

Much more recently, Jeonghan has taken up the title of Seraphia’s seventeenth king and ended up marrying his not-so-childhood sweetheart. Both his coronation and marriage were an even bigger mess than what you and Joshua had to go through, and both you and your husband don’t particularly like dwelling on it very much.

As for the things that aren’t all that different…

You take the time to quietly watch Joshua as he tells Yuta about a child that burst into the pub earlier—a child that has Yuta’s scowling face and potent lightning magic. Your friend shakes his head, wondering how long his wife is going to scold him for bringing their son to work again.

Yuta still calls you Ice Queen sometimes. Joshua is still very much a prince of Seraphia.

And you’re…still you.

“You have a letter again.”

Joshua glances at you from the front door of your shared home as he hangs his coat on the rack. You were in the middle of sorting the mail you’ve received today and saw that one of them is addressed to Joshua.

Even without a return address, you’ve been with your husband long enough to know it was from his ex-fiancée.

As the two of you prepare for bed, Joshua quietly reads over Hyejin’s letter with a fond look in his eyes. You try your best not to feel envious because he’s your husband, for gods’ sake. What’s more is that Hyejin is already with Chan. Neither of you know where they went after the two of them ran away from Seraphia, but Joshua still feels responsible for covering their tracks so no one could ever hope to disturb them.

He’s always been caring for others, after all.

“What’s wrong, snowflake?”

Joshua asks the question when you’re both already under the covers. When you first got together, he opted to call you snowflake instead of Ice Queen—saying that he wants to address his lover in a less demeaning way. You thought it to be ridiculous at first, but now you can’t help but melt at the endearment.

When you don’t respond, he sighs, taking your cold hands in his own. Curse this man. He knows you too well.

“Are you bothered by Hyejin’s letter?” he murmurs, kissing your knuckles tenderly.

“Just a little,” you answer honestly. “I’m sorry. It’s stupid, I know—”

“It’s not stupid. Don’t dismiss your own feelings so quickly like that.” Joshua pouts. “Does my wife need me to remind her that she’s the one I married in front of thousands of people six years ago? The one who screams my name in our bed every night?”

Scandalized, you smack him in the chest. “I do not scream your name! I have more courtesy for our neighbors than you might think.”

Your husband nods as if merely playing along, shoving the covers off your form before nuzzling the crook of your neck. “Yes, yes, of course. But you can’t deny that you moan it so prettily every time we lie together like this.”

Gods… Was he this infuriating when your love was still one-sided?

He strips you down like he’s already done countless times before. The two of you are bare in no time—clothes strewn all over the floor as your husband lowers himself on the bed and hooks your legs across his shoulders.

Husband.

It’s so surreal that the idiot who left you all alone that fateful morning several years ago is the same man who’s made you the happiest wife for the past six years.

“My, you’re much wetter than I thought you’d be,” Joshua teases with a breathy laugh, tracing your glistening slit with one of his long, thick fingers. “Here I thought you’d kick me out of the bedroom for trying something when you were in the middle of sulking.”

“I wasn’t sulking.”

“Sure you weren’t, snowflake.”

Then, his mouth was on you—making you forget about letters from past lovers and everything else in between.

Joshua tugs your thighs even closer as he feasts on your cunt, lathering his tongue in your essence before licking a long stripe across your seam. You let out a breathless whimper, hands immediately tangling themselves in his hair. You can feel him smirk against your sex but before you can make any side remarks about his cocky attitude, Joshua seals his lips over your clit and sucks on the sensitive nub. The effect it has on you is immediate—hips thrashing around as your husband relentlessly continues his ministrations.

“S-Shua,” you sigh, toes curling as a steady stream of pleasure continues to pulse into your core. “So good… Your mouth feels so good.”

He hums appreciatively before switching things up a little. You whimper in protest when his lips part from your clit, but he easily makes up for it by licking across your wet cunt in quick, repetitive succession. Your devil of a husband couples the amazing sensation with his fingers, quickly sliding in two of his digits because he knows you can take anything he gives you.

“Such a good little wife for me,” he chuckles as he buries them to the knuckles, delighting in the way you purr out his name again when he curls them just so. “I’ve done a tacky job at reminding you how much I love you these days, haven’t I? Can’t have you getting jealous over a bunch of letters when I should just make you come like this, hm?”

You can’t even process what he’s saying right now—too focused on pinpointing the release he’s slowly but surely building up.

Joshua continues murmuring a string of praises along your inner thighs, making sure to leave his mark across your skin. His love bites bloom like violets across your flesh and before you can let yourself revel in the sentiment of it all, he’s back to assaulting your quivering cunt with his sinful mouth.

“Joshua, please,” you cry out as he amps up the speed of his thrusts. “W-Want more.”

Your husband hums again but doesn’t have the heart to part with your delicious cunt, pulling his complete focus on your clit as he slides in a third finger. The stretch isn’t unfamiliar, but it burns a little. Overall, the sensation simply adds on to the growing fire inside your belly.

When your orgasm crests, you have to muffle an undignified moan with your hands—letting yourself ride it out as Joshua continues licking and slurping at your juices like a man starved.

You take a while to get your wits about you again, a breathless mess on the mattress as your husband pulls himself back up. When your brain is finally there again, the first thing you notice is how Joshua’s rock hard cock strains against his chiseled stomach.

“Always taste so fucking good, snowflake,” he chuckles, grabbing your chin with the fingers that were just inside you. “I could live off eating you up like this for the rest of my life.”

“You’re being ridiculous again,” you mutter shyly, warmth blooming across your cheeks.

Joshua laughs again and it’s such a beautiful sound, your heart flutters when it hits your ears. He gently presses his lips onto yours, letting you taste the tangy flavor of your release before sliding his tongue into your mouth.

You’ll never get tired of kissing Joshua. It felt so inexplicably good to kiss him the first time in that lone alley, but every single one you shared after you can finally call him yours felt twice as better, and several times sweeter.

“I love you,” he murmurs. “I’ll never regret choosing to spend the rest of my life with you.”

You chuckle, pressing your forehead against his. “Even if I refused to assimilate into the royal family? That’s the main reason why you couldn’t be king, right?”

Joshua simpers. “To hell with being king. The crown has always been Jeonghan’s to begin with. And I’d much rather spend my time pleasuring you like this than shoulder the biggest responsibility in the kingdom.”

“Mhmm. You chose right then.”

Your husband is mildly startled when you maneuver around to push him back on the bed. But Joshua doesn’t seem to have any plans to voice out his complaints when you prop yourself between his thighs—taking his hard, leaking cock in your small hand and giving it a few experimental pumps.

“Fuck. You look so good, darling,” he moans. “I won’t ever get tired of seeing you like this.”

You shake your head incredulously, a traitorous smile finding its way on your face. “Always such a sweet-talker. Pray tell, do you take eloquence classes as part of your upbringing as a prince? You never seem to run out of smooth things to say.”

“Well, we do have something similar to—”

Joshua’s words abruptly morph into a choked out sound when you take him into your mouth, letting your tongue slide across the vein jutting around his length. Your husband watches ravenously as you take him to the hilt—not once choking on his size with how many times you’ve already done this prior.

Despite how gentlemanly he is on the outside, you know Joshua likes his head sloppy. So you make sure to lather enough saliva around his cock as you bob your head up and down, wrapping your fist around the parts you can’t quite reach. The sinful sound of your lips working on his throbbing length is nearly enough to drive him to the pinnacle, but Joshua does his best to hold out for as long as he can.

When you feel his fingers in your hair, you let him push your head into his navel—delighting in the deep moan he lets out when he feels your throat constricting around the head of his cock.

“Pretty woman with a pretty mouth,” Joshua sighs pathetically as you look up at him with teary eyes. “But as much as I’d love to come down your throat and make you swallow it all…”

You let out a tiny squeak when Joshua lifts you off his cock and back onto the mattress.

“I want you to take all of my seed in this sweet cunt of yours instead,” he chuckles evilly, lining his cock up against stomach as if measuring just how deeply he’ll penetrate you.

The thought has you mewling with need.

“Joshua,” you mewl, lacing your fingers around his neck to pepper his face with quick, desperate kisses. “I need you inside me. All of you.”

“Yeah? You’ll let me come in this tight cunt?” he growls as he slides the head of his cock along your ruined slit. “Fuck you dumb and fill you up with my come? We can do it all over again once you’re dripping with me, you know? Just so we’re sure that my seed will take.”

“Yes,” you moan aloud as he finally slides into you. “Want your come. Want your children, Shua.”

Just as he’s buried himself to the hilt, Joshua pauses to stare at you with a look of disbelief. You don’t really blame him.

Though you’ve been married for quite some time now, the topic of starting a family hasn’t really crossed your minds yet. Joshua wanted to spend as much time as he could showing just how much he loves his wife. But discussions about having a child or two have come up every now and again—though most of it was in half-jest.

Now, though, you’re completely certain.

“Did you not hear me, dear husband?” you laugh, despite the way your walls clench around his hot length. “I want your children. How can you give me that when you’re busy gawking at me like you are now?”

Joshua doesn’t need to be told twice.

He quickly throws your legs over his shoulders, introducing an angle so delicious, it makes your eyes roll to the back of your head even when he has yet to move. Joshua breathes out a strained groan at the sight of you—hair fanning against the pillows with a wanton look in your eyes.

How could he not fuck you until you’re with child?

The first snap of his hips is brutal. It sends you forward on the bed and you feel every inch of him bypassing the tight ring of your hole. Your cunt squelches with every thrust, rendering you a panting mess beneath your husband of six years and hopefully more. Joshua leans down to pepper your chest with the same love bites he’s left between your thighs and you think fondly of the fact that your husband can still conjure flowers of his own without using his own magic.

“My gorgeous. Fucking. Wife,” he growls as he takes a handful of your breasts in his large, warm hands. “I’ve waited for so long for you to tell me you’re ready. Waited so long to fuck my seed so deep into you, you’ll be feeling me for days. You want to help me sire a bunch of little royals now? Let the entire kingdom know you’re mine?”

“I-I’ve—” You gasp when he grazes against that patch of spongy flesh inside you that makes you see stars. “I’ve always been yours, Shua. Always.”

Your husband smiles against your skin before pressing a long kiss on your lips. When you dare to look in his deep brown eyes again, you nearly lose yourself in the love reflected back.

“That’s right, snowflake,” Joshua sighs. “Mine to breed. Mine to fuck.”

“Mine to love.”

His tender words are your last straw. You spiral from the edge again as stars burst in the back of your eyelids, letting the rush of pleasure surge through your system as Joshua continues fucking himself into completion. Your husband is murmuring a string of sweet nothings as he chases after his own high, but you’re much too lightheaded to make sense of the words.

“I love you, I love you, I love you,” you babble senselessly as his cock hits the deepest parts of you. “I’ll never want anyone else but you, Shua.”

“So will I, love,” he confesses as his hips snap into a stuttering halt. You let out another broken moan when you feel his thick, hot emission paint your trembling walls in the white of his release—feeling so blissful, you nearly forget your own name.

“So will I.”

Joshua doesn’t stop there. Even when he knows you might need a minute to recover, he flips you over on the mattress, pulls your ass up in the air and continues fucking his spend even deeper inside you. Though you want to croak out in protest, you’re much too delirious with pleasure to voice it out.

“Need to make sure my seed takes, right, darling?” he breathes out as he smooths his large palms across the swell of your ass. “I can’t wait to see you heavy with my child. Don’t you ever think you’ll become any less beautiful than you are now when that does happen. Because I’ll continue reminding you just how unbelievably gorgeous you are.”

You want that too. More than anything you’ve ever wanted in your life.

It takes several more rounds for you to sate your primal need for each other. Joshua collapses into a heap right next to you on the bed and you try not to laugh—convinced that doing so would make his come trickle out of your poor, abused cunt.

“Hello,” your husband murmurs once he’s caught his breath.

You giggle. “Hi.”

As he engulfs you in the endless heat of his embrace, your eyes catch on the collection of beautiful daisies on your nightstand. It’s the very same bouquet Joshua had given to you the night he came to apologize for his mistakes—enduring the passage of time with Wonwoo’s freshly honed preservation magic.

The cold of winter outside continues to seep into the room even when Joshua has already dozed off by your side. You glance at him lovingly, remembering him say that he’s grown to hate the season when Hyejin broke off their engagement in the middle of the snow.

But both of you are at that point in your lives where you don’t need to bury yourself in a mountain of blankets nor do you need to toss too much wood into the hearth. As long as Joshua remains by your side, you’ll always be warm.

⟢ end notes: i hope to god that tumblr won't crash when someone reblogs this monster lmfao. thank you for making it til the end! heads up that i might take a break from this series for a while bc writing this expended so many of my brain cells, i just have to step away for a while. i hope you'll still be looking forward for the third and final installment of the series hehe jeonghan's going to be getting his own spotlight very soon~

this is part of the it’s complicated series.

#fic rec #one of my fave authors! :)#WORTH THE READ GO GO GO

1K notes · View notes