f3atherna

[f3atherna]

the obsession to be perfect after growing up ugly

[f3atherna]

never hungry just bored

never hungry just stressed

never hungry just tired

never hungry just sad

never hungry just thirsty

never hungry just bored

never hungry just tired

never hungry just stressed

[f3atherna]

the best feeling in the world os when it gets to 8:30pm and your stomach is still empty

[f3atherna]

WIEAD 1/05/2025

breakfast: cinnamon and raisin bagel thin, with yogurt and apple slices (450 c4l)

dinner: salmon and rice with cucumber, peppers, tomato, ans hummus ((380 c4l)

exercise: 11,244 steps, burning 354 c4l

total: 584 c4l

ik i need to do better i’m trying to lock in :/ m3ansp0 would help i think

[f3atherna]

I don’t only crave thinness

I crave the stares

I crave the worrying

I crave the envy

I crave the feeling

I crave the power

I crave the whispers and thoughts about how much I’ve changed

I crave the sculpted and hollow face

I crave the thigh gap

I crave the flat and tiny waist

I crave the light and dainty feeling

I crave perfection

And thin is the closest I’ll get!

[f3atherna]

if you eat, exercise. if you cant exercise, don't eat.

[f3atherna]

the way i hate everything about myself rn

[f3atherna]

a princess wouldn't eat like a pig, you shouldn't either 💞

[f3atherna]

[f3atherna]

“What’s your biggest fantasy?”

idk maybe getting super skinny and then becoming a celebrity in our community and be peoples inspo and have a lot of friends 🤧

[f3atherna]

i love when i start ⭐️ again and all of my self betterment comes back to me. like my skin clears up and my grades shoot upwards just bc im not distracted by food 🤷‍♀️

[f3atherna]

The devil couldn't reach me so he made me a 5'2 girl with the appetite of a 6'4 man

[f3atherna]

edblr intro 🪶

hello! i’m cal, and i’m 20. i’m not new to edblr but i decided to come back bc i’m currently relapsing :/

sw: 210lb

gw1: 150lb

gw2: 132lb

ugw: 110lb

i started struggling with BED when i was 13 and convinced myself that i was okay living my life as a fat pig until i was 18 (this was when i started to ⭐️ and joined edblr)

had @an@ and m1a since i was 18, but tried to recover

because i’m relapsing i really needs someone to hold me accountable as i’m scared i won’t reach my goals

not pr0 an@ for anyone but myself

dni if racist/sexist/transphobic/homophobic etx; don’t wanna see 3d content

BLOCK DON’T REPORT

pls reblog so i can find mutuals 💗

[f3atherna]

i need an @n@ buddy to keep me accountable in this relapse

[f3atherna]

Imagine going into a store and you can pick out whatever you want because your body is goals.

[f3atherna]

I usually avoid tumblr out of shame after a binge but I wanted to make a list of all the negative feelings that come immediately after and things to remind myself next time

I feel so physically uncomfortable

I feel ugly

My clothes look ugly

Stomach cramps

Teeth feel fuzzy

Gassy

Guilt and self hate

I feel heavy and moving takes more effort

I’m bloated

I feel like a failure with no self respect or control

I feel lethargic

I’m now in a shit mood and taking it out on people around me

I feel sick

I wasted money on mid food when there are 5000 things I’d rather save money for

The short term satisfaction was not worth it. It felt good for literally the few seconds the food was in my mouth and now I hate myself

The cravings will pass

Feeling empty is so much better than feeling full

Idc if you’re on your period. Grow up

F4st1ng/r3strict1ng feels sooooo much more rewarding

However hungry you are right now, you can wait until you get home where there is plenty of healthy food that won’t make you feel guilt

No, you don’t need to buy the box of snacks just to have on hand because you can practise restraint and only have one. You will eat the whole box. Save your money, don’t even go into the shop

I’m further from my goals than I was this morning

I had come this far without binging and now I’ve ruined my progress and have to start again

I’m terrified to weigh myself tomorrow instead of excited to see how much I lost

The longer i go without a binge, the easier it gets

The post binge clarity has me stressing the fuck out but what’s done is done, all I can do now is try to be better.

[f3atherna]

i hate binge eating after a day of not eating anything