fantasymusing

[fantasymusing]

I wrote a meta about this - Beauty and The King - to talk about how Lee Gon won our hearts with his sincerity about Tae-eul’s beauty in his eyes.

“I’m seeing something beautiful again.” It was a vow of reverence, a whisper of admiration.

His proclamations were mostly to himself - it was never a pick-up line to woo his girl 🖤.

Now onto the main event...

TKEM novel writer - how dare you tease Gon like that?

The next footage showed Tae-Eul wearing the Queen’s formal robes.

“Ah.” Gon’s jaw went slack, mind completely dazed.

Seeing Tae-Eul in a formal royal dress… this was something he had never imagined before. She had simply said “not today” when asked about being his Queen… Yet the elegant garment embroidered with gold and red threads suited her perfectly.

... This moment. Right there staring at his girl, his beautiful Tae-Eul, made him happy and sad at the same time.

How I wish the episode would let us see her in an actual queen outfit as well (instead of the cutout).

Then comes one of the saddest scenes that I love, and, dread.

Gon gave a mirthless laugh, his heart constricting in a painful squeeze.

“I think I’m going to miss you so much. Can’t you come with me? Can’t you live with me in my world?” He already knew the answer but he asked anyway.

... Gon wasn’t the only one hurting. Tae-Eul felt a tightness in her chest, her almond eyes cast down, voice wavering in a sea of melancholic emotions. Her anguish only cut him deeper.

No words could make up for expressing how sorry he was. Gon chose to kiss her instead, pressing his lips against hers in a a sweet, short interlude.

... Feeling immense love, yet overwhelmed by a constant heartache. Because they couldn’t fulfill the other’s wishes and desires.

The push-and-pull between love and obligations. When you know what your heart wants but you are not free to embrace it and yet you are too in love to let it go. I hurt for them every time I watch this scene.

Would this day ever come? Would he see this picture turn into reality one day? Gon found it hard to look away from the frozen image of Tae-Eul in the Queen’s dress, a beaming smile on her face.

“… I hope you’ll say yes.”

His wish remained unheard, fading away in the empty room...

The pining - his, and HERS. Yes, hers. Tae-eul wouldn’t have put that queen outfit on if she hadn’t at least wished for it. Remember, she didn’t grow up with fairy tales or play dress-up.

I don’t believe they can live with that push-and-pull forever. It would have been too much and too limiting. So I have my view on what she eventually says.

One additional note - this is in the episode but I just want to say I can’t with the foreshadowing:

“Even if I have eternal life in there, I will still come back to you. If I’m late, it’s because I’m on my way.”

I do wonder if these were some of his words Tae-eul had clung to after the timeline reset when she had no idea if she would ever see him again.

Tkem novel 17

Chapter 3 (Volume II) - The turmoil that finally broke out

It didn’t take him long to find the file he was looking for. It was a video simply named “Guest”. He double clicked on it and the security footage instantly played out in front of him. Gon’s lips instinctively stretched into a smile.

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[fantasymusing]

If anyone can tell me how to fangirl for a job, I’m all ears. Way late to the party but I’ve re-read this post in anticipation for the next chapter update and still want to jot down couple additional thoughts.

She didn’t like the look on Gon’s face, which betrayed a mix of happiness and sorrow.

Can you blame Gon? This is only the second time they were able to be physically together [and I don’t mean THAT 😳] after they became a couple and it has been too brief. A perfect place for a perfect date - yet he knows, and she knows, their time is fleeting.

Being together with this kind hearted man definitely made her feel like time flew more quickly. He was sitting next to her, but she already missed him.

Bravo to @accioecho for the feels. I love fatalistic writing... and the last sentence is so well translated to tell us exactly how bitter sweet Tae-eul feels. But girl, something’s gotta give sooner than later... and I suspect deep down she knows it but she’s still fighting it.

“I was pretending to be okay, but I’m not. You’ll be back soon, right?”

This was included in the episode but as a closing thought, I want to squeal that the writer is confirming to us Tae-eul actually has zero chill when it comes to Gon. Some has said she seems “cold” at times. That’s because she is pretending to be okay. She knows she’s in deeper and faster than she has expected - so her rational self is trying to put the brakes on even if it’s already a lost cause.

tkem novel 16

The slow current of water flowed endlessly under the glow of the bridge’s lights, the soft river breeze blending with the smell of water. Even though they were probably a few weeks away from snow-filled days, winter sometimes brought unusually warm weather.

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[fantasymusing]

YES! Book 2 🖤

The second book of the novel opens with one of the loveliest and the saddest exchanges between Gon and Tae-eul.

Tae-eul had been wanting but not knowing how to comfort Gon - now that she had learned about his history and his reality. She invited Gon because she thought he wanted to meet the woman with his mother’s face. At the same time, she worried about his feelings. And ladies and gentlemen, that’s love. Always thinking on behalf of, always wanting to protect the other person.

Gon was comforted - not by her actions - but by her intentions.

Gon couldn’t help but be happy at seeing her so concerned.

I also love this scene because it let us see how playful they are with each other.

The cinematography of the show was stunning - the open field with the sunset in the back drop. It amplifies the ending of the scene  - the beauty of their love against the fate that stood in their way. The sun was setting and they might be running out of time.

“So what’s your answer? Will you do it?” Gon’s eyes grew serious.

He was being sincere. Tae-Eul knew it, too. Gon closed the distance between them, pulling her tightly against him. Tae-Eul didn’t try to push him away. She burrowed closer, pressing her face against his chest. His embraces felt familiar and warm now. Like she was coming home. She wanted this moment to last forever, a safe cocoon where time stood still.

He was like home. Tae-eul wanted time to stand still. Eventually she would have to decide if he would be her home.

“Will you do it?”

“If I say no, will I never see you again?”

Would Tae-Eul know that Gon’s heart stopped beating for a fraction of a second there? She probably wouldn’t. Slightly hurt, Gon looked down at her with a piercing gaze.

I remember feeling Gon’s hurt watching this scene. Why, Tae-eul? We know you wanted to say yes.

“So it’s a no?”

“Not today.”

What did it mean?

“I’ve been thinking. I’m just going to live for today and not think about anything else...”

“… In moments like this, couples pledge their eternal love. But we’ll only live for today?”

Tae-Eul wanted forever too. She wanted to live happily ever, in the safety and warmth of his arms.

If only their universes were one.

But that was just wishful thinking.

“That’s right. There’s no tomorrow for us. That’s why I’m hoping today is a long day.” Trying her best to ignore Gon’s tormented look, Tae-Eul grabbed his hands again. “This is why I’m holding your hand. Because we’ll only live today.”

They both wished this road would never end.

They both wanted forever. Tae-eul thought they couldn’t have forever when they each belonged in a different world.

How sad is it to love as deeply as they do but to think there won’t be a tomorrow for them?

Yet Tae-eul didn’t back down - even when there wasn’t a promise of tomorrow. She might have given up on the thought of a forever but she never gave up on loving Gon. And that’s the silver lining - their stubbornness about loving each other would win against all odds.

Tkem novel 15

Chapter 1 (novel 2) - Today is more precious than forever.

The two of them stood in the empty field side by side, both gazing at the sun setting down far into the distance. This place they were at was Song Jeong-Hye’s— Lee Ji-Hun’s biological mom, last known address.

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[fantasymusing]

Sorry for being super late to the party - maybe I was asking for it when I decided to start a new job during a pandemic! Better late... I don’t want to finish Volume 1 without jolting down a couple of thoughts.

Re-reading Chapter 18 was timely actually. My best friend watched TKEM on my recommendation and she texted me during the week to say she thought Tae-eul was a bit schizo 😲:

“Didn't you find her being cold at times and then missing him Soooo much and running into his arms when he shows up?”

She wasn’t the first to have said that. Why @accioecho is doing the fandom’s work when some of the details from the novel are so luminating:

... when Gon first came in the Republic of Korea. In her world, he had no official name, no job, no real identity and this was one of the reasons why Gon always kept by her side... Over time, Gon’s presence had become as familiar to her as the sight of the moon in the dark of night. A constant anchor. To the point that she felt a heavy void filling her heart on moonless nights.

Gon did that - a month in the Republic was a serious commitment, espeically given the context. He was serious enough about Tae-eul, about knowing her, he didn’t think twice about putting himself out there for her.

So it wasn’t a sudden change of heart. Tae-eul’s feeling towards Gon has been growing, even if she did not show much of it outwardly. 

Fate was determined by the choices they made but there were times when fate chose them. This was the case for Tae-Eul, for Gon. They stood together. In front of their fate.

... Daily life was short enough as it was and Tae-Eul couldn’t prevent the sad feeling that it was all fleeting. So she took a decision. She would break free of the fate that chose her. She would not avoid anything and let go of her doubts and suspicions.

From then on, she would just decide on loving him.

Tae-eul had thought much about the kind of daunting fate that she would have to face together with Gon if she chose him. And she did have a decision to make. She made that decision - then her action and attitude followed. Her being cold at times when she didn’t know if she should believe him was a reflection of her inner struggle. But that “coldness” was done with once she decided to believe him, to be with him.

~

A while ago, @ambitious-witch pointed out to me that Gon wasn’t as open as people would have thought. He was the most willing to share with Tae-eul but he did hold back quite a bit. Chapter 19 shows us just that:

“Are you okay?” Tae-Eul asked, concern evident in her voice.

Instead of addressing her worries, Gon chose instead to redirect his focus on the brother’s wife.

Gon redirected, even with Tae-eul. He also didn’t reveal to Tae-eul the secret of the manpasikjeok until after she escaped from Lee Lim’s men in the Kingdom.

Gon was realizing, as he spent time with Tae-eul - that she really was his soul mate because he could trust her completely, that she only had his best interest at heart.

Tae-Eul caught him off guard. This was a thought that hadn’t even crossed his mind. Leaning back, he laughed heartily. Just looking at Tae-Eul brought him comfort and he was glad to be  able to go through all this together with her.

Thanks for taking us along this ride @accioecho! So excited to read Volume 2 🤓

tkem novel 14

Chapter 18 - “Just choosing to love you.”

Right before she was due to start her stakeout, Tae-Eul took a short break to meet Gon. She had asked him to stay at Eun-Sup’s place for the time being but he had booked a hotel room instead.

Keep reading

[fantasymusing]

I love how the added details in the novel give us a bigger window into Gon and Tae-eul’s relationship.

With her, he is never the king (there’s a meta I want to write about this whenever I find time in my life 😣). He is a man in love with a woman. He doesn’t give her orders or feels superior - he listens and lets her show him who she is. He never tries to fit her into a mold - he is truly invested in knowing her and he admires/loves her for her - why none of us can ever move on.

Tae-Eul’s shooting abilities were incomparable. Gon was no match for her. Sure, when he saw Tae-Eul’s remarkable skills he had first felt a little embarrassed by his poor performance. However that feeling had quickly been replaced by pride.

“Why do you like that stuffed animal anyway?” Tae-Eul asked when she saw his proud smile.

“Because it’s a lion. It resembles you. Lions are fierce, courageous. And impressive.”

He respected, no— liked her bravery. This trait was one of the things that made Tae-Eul inherently her. But just this one time, he wished she was less courageous.

... He was wrong. She was braver than he thought. She was brave and amazing.

On her end, Tae-eul falls hard for Gon because she knows the two of them understand each other and she is her better version because of him - she has found her soul mate.

Despite all this, there was one thing that she was sure about.

Gon probably didn’t know this.

Yes, she had always been courageous. But in that instant, the reason that gave her strength, the reason why she felt she could be braver was because of him. Because he was by her side.

...There was a time not so long ago when Tae-Eul thought she would never understand him... She thought he was just a crazy guy and they would never be on the same page.

Before she knew it, she found herself understanding Gon’s way of thinking and perfectly being able to read his feelings. Because she was the same.

@accioecho thanks again for another wonderful chapter. 

Tkem novel 13

Chapter 17 “A joint investigation”

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[fantasymusing]

“The heart wants what it wants...”

Exhibit A: Jeong Tae-eul

She wished Gon would come back soon. She wished he would appear right there, right then, in her courtyard atop Maximus.

The voice she longed to hear all this time rang clear in the empty courtyard. Turning around, Tae-Eul saw Gon standing tall...

From the Kingdom of Corea to the Republic of Korea. Crossing universes.

Tae-Eul knew how far these two worlds were. How big the space between 1 and 0 was.

There were a few things she could do now. She could touch him. She could embrace him.

...

“Just a normal daily life with you. Call you… chat on the phone… Ask you what you did today… and tell you that I missed you a lot.” Gon went on.

He was saying aloud all the things Tae-Eul had been thinking about in his absence.

Thanks to the novel, we can read more of Tae-eul’s inner thoughts. We see that she wants to share a life with Gon as early as the start of their relationship, and she is painfully aware that living in two separate worlds is what stands in their way.

Do we not think she will see the necessity of not living in two worlds so her heart can get what it wants eventually?

_____________

Exhibit B: Lee Gon

“Have you been waiting for me?”

Unable to tear her eyes away from him, she nodded once more.

Gon who was equally glad to see her let out a small laugh. “That’s a relief. I was a bit scared that you didn’t want me to come back—”

With Tae-Eul’s head tightly pressed against his chest, Gon felt his heart skip a beat. Silently, he wrapped his arms around her.

He had spent hours and hours searching for Tae-Eul...

“It seems like you bought it and waited for me to come back. Why did you save Shin-Jae’s number though?”

Gon felt a surge of happiness at the idea that Tae-Eul bought this phone for him and waited for him to come back to give it to him.

“Don’t hang up. I always wanted to try this.”

“What is this?”

“Just a normal daily life with you. Call you… chat on the phone… Ask you what you did today… and tell you that I missed you a lot.” Gon went on.

“Me too.” Tae-Eul admitted in one breath.

Gon’s chest tightened, joy rippling through him. He didn’t know his heart could beat so fast.

Lee Gon has searched for Jeong Tae-eul for years. His heart wants to find the special someone so he no longer has to be alone.

The novel describes those things his heart does when he is with Tae-eul - which tells him she is that someone.

Thanks for another beautiful write-up @accioecho!

Tkem Novel 12

Chapter 15 - “The secret only I know”

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[fantasymusing]

countdown to christmas: home alone (1990)

Bless this highly nutritious microwavable macaroni and cheese dinner and the people who sold it on sale. Amen.

[fantasymusing]

Some things she can’t forget, or forgive …

Koo Seo-gyeong (Luna) in 2022

Lady Kim Soon-hee, Head Dresser of the Royal Wardrobe

Myeong Seung-a, Royal Public Affairs Officer

[fantasymusing]

Once upon a time when GA had M.A.G.I.C.

And we can’t get enough of it.

“ Hey! We stick together. You know, we all did this. Nobody’s a victim. We … we stick together. ”

GET TO KNOW ME» favorite friendships               ↳ M.A.G.I.C. [Grey’s Anatomy]

[fantasymusing]

How lucky are we to get two posts in a row - with the added bonus of the kitchen scene.

Again, this “lose translation” flows so beautifully maybe @accioecho should always be pressed 😋.

Yes, this part basically follows the show - but we now know more what registered in Tae-eul’s mind and heart:

Now she thought of Gon whenever she felt lonely. Because that’s how he probably felt too, back in her world.

This validates her own contradictory feelings towards Gon when he was in the Republic the first time.

The novel also let us know more about how affected Tae-eul was seeing Gon’s scar. We wouldn’t know that from the show.

And this:

Whether it was 25 years ago or today, the only person who was able to unburden this heavy load was the one person whose existence made no sense in his world.

Tae-Eul couldn’t help but feel the unfairness of the situation. She had always been Gon’s constant, his zero. Without realizing it, she had started wanting to be his zero as well.

plus,

He had always been the sharp, dutiful King leading a country for most. But to her, he was an honorable man with a vulnerability that only she could see.

... how Gon & Tae-eul pull us into their fated story of love.

This chapter as a whole in the novel, gave us more insight into Tae-eul’s discoveries - of Gon’s world, of her belief and trust in him, of her admiration of him, and of her deeper-than-she-could-admit feelings for Gon.

And for Gon, her visit made him see the true possibility (and hope) of having Tae-eul in the kingdom with him.

Thank you for translating! It is really hard work to translate. If it is not too much work I was wondering if there were any differences in the dialogue in the scene where Lee Gon cooks for Tae-eul? Or if you could share a little bit what Tae-eul was feeling when he was flirting. Thank you again

Hello dear Nonny, thank you for your message :3Since a few other people have also asked me about the Kitchen Scene™, h e r e y o u g o ↓ (bear with me, I translated this part a bit hastily so this is a loose translation). 

Under cut because this got long.

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[fantasymusing]

Another beautiful rendition inspired by the iconic ep12 that rips your heart out 🖤

How can anyone not recognize how superb the pairing and how powerful their story are!

in any world { i’d choose you }

- my painting inspired by the kdrama king: eternal monarch is all done 

instagram: @winterofherdiscontent 

[fantasymusing]

Wow, this is a supersized post! There’s a lot of content in Ch.14, especially with Gon and Tae-eul’s relationship. @accioecho wrote an eloquent piece that reads like a novel (instead of a translation). I’ve done some translation in my past life and I can say what she gave us takes a lot of skill and effort - so THANK YOU!

Gon was smitten - and he was not afraid for others to see - Yeong, Secretary Mo, his security team and PM Koo - the only one who didn’t quite see it was TE, probably because she felt she couldn’t measure up to PM Koo.

KSR’s complete disregard of her King’s boundary and feelings was made more apparent as we found out LG/JTE/KSR met on the helipad (instead of just in front of the KU building) because she took the chopper to stick her nose into something that’s not her business.

Gon clearly didn’t appreciate PM Koo’s innuendo. And now that he is pursuing a relationship with Tae-eul, he’s right to worry about her getting the wrong idea. And here we learn Tae-eul could see the PM covet Gon and she did feel intimidated by and thought she couldn’t compare herself to the elegant and flawless PM. YIKES all around!

We see more about Gon and TE discovering each other’s loss. She didn’t want his sympathy here but it opened the door for it to become part of their bond later.

It’s also important to know, a part of TE already didn’t want to leave KOC/LG.

And yes, Gon is the perfect man who only laughs for TE 🥺

Tkem novel 11

Chapter 14 - “Calling out your name”

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[fantasymusing]

Learning @accioecho’s process gives me even deeper appreciation of how beautifully written her recaps are. Truly, thank you!

“From the moment he had asked her to be his Queen back in her world, he had envisioned this moment. When he came back to the palace with Tae-Eul in another universe, he had thought about it again. The fact that this had all come true put a smile on his face.”

We know from his guards and his staff’s reaction that Lee Gon rarely displays “regular happiness” during his day-to-day. The glimpses of true companionship we have seen before he met Tae-eul would be his interactions with Jo Yeong. It warms my heart she would slowly displace that loneliness.

“Assuming she would get hungry at some point, Gon had gone down to the royal kitchens to personally cook dinner for her.” ~ Two words: Boyfriend/Husband goals.

“They were each other’s white rabbit, both chasing after time, trying to capture elusive moments together.” ~ Insight like this is why we need the novels.

“Even so, Tae-Eul felt this was unfair. She could easily accept that the idea of her existence could be construed as inexplicable, confusing. But to see her as a threat seemed excessive.

Tae-Eul stood rooted on the spot, silently listening to La dy Noh’s hurtful words, unable to reply back.”

I remember being surprised by how unreasonably harsh Lady Noh was to Tae-eul while watching the episode the first time. The novel helps point out it was her emotional response - the feeling of being threatened. And this is how fear works - she let it cloud the one thing she really wanted in all those 25 years - Gon’s happiness. She didn’t realize her best intention - in the name of protecting now an adult King who can fend for himself - could drive away his only shot of finding his soul mate. What if Tae-eul wasn’t as brave or tenatious, or as willing to follow her heart?

“When Gon was with her in the Republic of Korea he had never lied to her once. He kept telling her about his world...

...Those vibrant eyes inviting her to his home. He had made her long for him. He had made her want to believe him. He had made her miss him...

...Their two worlds were too different anyway...

...Lady Noh had advised her not to get too curious, to not even think of staying here. But it was already too late. She could not go back.” ~ Oh thank god!

“The bed Tae-Eul was lying on was smooth and comfy, but it felt like its surface was made of tiny thorns.” All the description in the book allows us a better glimpse into Tae-eul’s inner struggle and how uncomfortable she was at first with the reality of the two worlds she and Gon belong in respectively.

“Seriously. The man was chiseled like a classical sculpture. And with his eyes closed like he had now, he looked even more like a greek model.” ~ Oh mama, the attraction was never one-sided!

“Gon smiled, barely containing his joy. For the first time in a long while, he felt genuinely, truly happy.” ~ How dare anyone take that away from him, whether it be Lee Lim, Jo Yeong, Lady Noh, PM Koo... y’all have to go through me Tae-eul  first.

Last note:  Don’t miss OP’s tags

Tkem Novel 10

Chapter 13 - “A made up mind”

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[fantasymusing]

Let me say upfront @accioecho is upping her tags game… I now read her tags before I read her text 😉

This reads like a beautifully written adaptation rather than a translation of text. The description you used to capture the emotions behind the scenes is A+.

Back to our Gon and Tae-eul...

The added inner thoughts that we weren’t privy to onscreen of how beautiful Gon saw Tae-eul as. It mirrored the “I saw something beautiful” proclamation. I must say though we could feel how mesmerized Gon was watching that sexual tension superbly acted out by Lee Min Ho and Kim Go Eun. I also think at this point of the story, Gon has gone from loving the idea of Jeong Tae-eul as related to his savior, to truly loving her as who she was - the woman he had met, spent time with and got to know. And he wanted a future with that woman.

Also love reading the details about the contrast the Royal Guards noticed in Gon the King vs Gon the man. And how his affectionate and playful ways with Tae-eul is so shocking to them and would cause such a stir in the Palace.

Tkem Novel 9

Chapter 12 - Crossing the space between 1 and 0

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[fantasymusing]

Is it a coincidence that Chapter 11 is about the events of 11.11?

She was happy to see him - even if she had to hold herself back.

Glad to learn the novel was clear and gave more details about the fact that Tae-eul had been thinking about Lee Gon and had looked for him everywhere in her world after he left. Simply put, she knew deep down she did like him (even if it wasn’t entirely romantic yet). So to those who, for whatever ill reasons, like to assassinateJeong Tae-eul’s character take note: all that happened BEFORE she went to his world, not after.

And Gon’s hands were large (we see that too - LMH’s hands are noticeably larger than KGE’s), Tae-eul’s hair was soft...

Thank you @accioecho for a beautifully written excerpt and your 😳 tags.

Tkem Novel 8

Chapter 11 - Appearing like the first snow

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[fantasymusing]

Happy Birthday to You

Oct 28 is Lee Gon’s birthday. I wrote this story because I’m a glutton for pain and my TKEM withdrawal is real.  

PC: Ctto

October 28, 2020 | Republic of Korea

It was a sleepless night.

She tossed and turned until she decided to get up, put on a hoodie and jeans, grabbed her coat and car key, then tiptoed away from her apartment.

1:00 a.m.

She drove in the quiet of the night and got there in a breeze.

The phone booth was the first thing she saw. She went inside and caressed the buttons and the handset. At several points of a different timeline, he was here. She lingered, with the hope that sharing the same space would somehow lessen the pain.

She was wrong. The yearning had only gotten stronger.

She walked on, deeper into the bamboo forest, in the dead of night, against everything she would advise young women as a police officer.

Do the same stars shine on both their worlds?

If she would wish upon one of them in earnest, would it carry her birthday wish to him?

She stopped at the spot where the obelisks stood, where he had crossed into her world.

“Happy birthday, Lee Gon.” She spoke into the sky. “The moon and the stars above as my witness, saranghae… I will always love you!”

Her tears took over, making her choke on her words.

“Please come back… please come back… I’m waiting, every day I’m waiting.”

She didn’t think her prayer would be answered tonight. It hadn’t been for six months. But she pleaded with God just the same – figured her persistence might move even fate and destiny someday.

She didn’t know how long she had been standing there. Her face was icy from the chilled fall air and her heart ached from imagining him running through the portal toward her.

She couldn’t hear the crashing of their bodies or feel the warmth of their embrace.

“Is this what Hell is like?” A rhetorical question she knew too well the answer to. She had been in her personal hell.

…

She showed up at the police station early to avoid her father’s questions.

Work had been her refuge even if she was only biding time.

And time had been mostly a curse that passed too slow and passed too fast.

Just like today.

She followed some evidence of her current case, she filed a few reports, she interacted with the squad like any regular day – yet she still had time to sob in the bathroom.

When it was finally time to leave work, she sat patiently in the packed afternoon traffic and arrived around sunset.

The glass encasing the phone booth reflected the bright orange light of the lowering sun and cloaked its surrounding in beautiful golden hue. The colour of the MSD she would have made for him to toast his birthday. Yes, she had planned his birthday – it would have included a day off from work, fried chicken, a walk along the Han river, the swanky hotel he loved and unhurried love-making.

The only thing missing from her plan for today – him.

She had no logical reason to be back at the bamboo forest so soon. But like she had been possessed, she stood once again by what she knew to be the entrance to the portal.

She was hoping against hope that fate wouldn’t be so cruel today, of all days.

“You are thirty-four now, take care of yourself for me. Don’t catch a cold.”  She whispered into the wind as the sky turned dark. “Happy birthday, my heart…” Tae-eul reached up to touch her necklace as another lone tear fell.

 October 28, 2020 | Kingdom of Corea

The fall was always beautiful in the Kingdom and people everywhere were taking advantage of the start of the three holidays in honour of the King’s birthday.

Lee Gon had vehemently opposed to any public celebrations for his birthday this year. Head Court Lady Noh and the senior staff had attempted to object but they knew better.

The King had been different the last few months. He was burdened with something that snuffed the sparkles in his eyes. He had been attending to his duties during the first half of each week but had consistently been “inside his study working on a complex mathematic problem” the other half of the time.

“I would be in my studies during the holidays and over the weekend.” He had informed Lady Noh.

“That’s no way to spend your birthday, Pyeha. You should be going out meeting beautiful ladies.”

“That’s what I have been doing. You’d know when I’ve found the right one.” Lady Noh thought he was teasing her and she couldn’t understand the hint of sadness in his tone.

He had indeed been meeting beautiful ladies – all those different versions of Jeong Tae-eul: all beautiful, all bright, all seemed happy – but all not her.

None of them recognized him. None of them was balm to his soul.

He couldn’t take it anymore.

He should let himself do whatever he wanted on his birthday, even if it were to tinker with the time axis of the portal.

He had not perfected his calculations and the trial-and-error attempts through different doors and universes had been painfully disappointing.

He was sure he had found the old timeline and the right door to his Tae-eul before the reset. He just didn’t know exactly what date or time he would cross into.

He had brought with him flowers, his favorite ones, to give her. He knew what he had to say to her – he had said those things to her every night, when he had pretended she was there by his side.

He just needed to see her.

The Taekwondo centre, the tea place and the courtyard all looked welcoming as he approached. Then he had to stop and took several deep breaths to steel himself when he caught sight of her standing in front of the big window watering the seeds she brought from the Kingdom. He could feel the sting of tears in his eyes.

He had found his beautiful lady, even if this would all just be temporary.

He stood staring, couldn’t take his eyes off her. She looked up, saw him, and ran out the door.

He was scared to walk up to her, to touch her, afraid she might disappear.

She looked like an angel in front of him, pure and most beautiful. His heart ached from how much love he felt for her.

He finally took the steps toward her.

“Hey.

“Have you been well?”

She nodded with tears in her eyes. “It took you, a while this time.”

He couldn’t tell her what was to come. He couldn’t tell her how much pain he was in. But he could tell her she was everything that mattered.

“Because I had to come from far away.” He looked down at the flowers he was carrying.

“I realized… that I never gave you a single flower. That’s why…

“I crossed the universe for you.”

She moved forward, then stepped back, instinctively recognizing he was not the same Lee Gon who left a few weeks ago.

He understood her hesitation. But he had no time to waste.

He got closer and put the bouquet of flowers in her hands. “But the thing is,

“I have to go back now.” He could hardly finish the sentence.

She had liked the idea of him leaving less and less, so she grabbed his hand. “Going back?” She questioned like a plea.

He stifled a sob that was threatening to escape. “Right.”

What if he would decide to throw caution to the wind and stay with her? He wanted to, badly.

“I also realized I never told you this.”

He slowly gathered enough courage to look up at her, letting her perfect face sink deep into his memory. This memory would have to last him until he was able to find the right her again.

“Saranghae.”

“I am deeply…

“in love with you.”

His gaze was soft, sincere yet most sorrowful. She was moved, elated and scared out of her mind. He was telling her like he would not have another chance to ever again.

He bent down to kiss her, as deeply as he possibly could.

His tears fell.

She reached up, held onto his hand like she had always done while kissing him back just as deeply.

Her tears fell.

He had wished the kiss could last their lifetime but he knew he couldn’t stay. He made himself walk away but not before telling her, “There will come a moment when it seems I’ve disappeared.

I don’t want you to worry too much when that happens.

It just means… I’m walking through the frozen moments in time.”

He had made the decision to leave her, to go back in time to stop Lee Lim before he could wreak havoc to both worlds, because she had given him strength. In the days and months they had fallen in love with each other, she had shown him what it meant to not be alone, to have a soul mate who would be there no matter how dire the circumstances were, and to have a lover who would love him for him. He would forever be thankful for having her in his life and he would always love her with everything he had.

But he had doubts nowadays, about whether the wrongs he had righted were worth the prospect of living out his life without her, the only person who inspired him every day with the joy of life.

Why he missed her utterly on his birthday.

She had told him the larger the fate, the more he needed to walk to reach his destination and that they just hadn’t reached their destination yet.

So he walked, back toward the portal, back to the Kingdom – leaving behind the old timeline, leaving behind the Tae-eul he fell so deeply in love with, in search for the one waiting for him in her new timeline.

He would get back on Maximus, he would go through more doors, more universes.

And he would pray for that tomorrow when he would find where he left his heart and his soul.

Maybe his next birthday would be different.

He closed his eyes, made his wish, as another lone tear fell.

Notes:

Sorry this is so painful. Based on canon timeline, October 28, 2020 is a sad birthday for Lee Gon and for Tae-eul.

Promise the next chapter (of year 2021) will be all fluff.

You can find this story also on AO3.

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Watch Lee Min-ho and Kim Go-eun’s superb performance in this scene. Their sadness is palpable. His pauses and pacing tell the story.

[fantasymusing]

@accioecho provided so much more details via the novels even though the idea of JTE’s pining and LG’s visit with his uncle were in the show.

We saw much more of Gon’s pining for JTE on screen, but it’s important to understand the progression of their relationship to know JTE has also been feeling his absence and pondering his words after he left when she should have been relieved if she were as unaffected by Gon as she would like to appear. Her world was already becoming rounder even if she couldn’t admit it yet.

And the insight that Gon’s relationship with his uncle is a mutually rewarding one - that they each partly filled the void resulted from Lee Ho’s death - helps explain Prince Byeoung’s loyalty and Gon’s devastation when he was killed.

Now I’ll patiently wait for the added details to Tae-eul’s first visit to the Kingdom 🖤

Tkem Novel 7

Chapter 9 - “This place that lacks your presence”

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