ficsideblogbecauseanxiety - Tumblr blog

[ficsideblogbecauseanxiety]

My entry for the LawLu Big Bang 2018/2019 event! @lawlu-events

[Here] is a companion piece, drawn by the lovely @daikoryu

I've had a lot of fun in this event and got a talk to a lot of creators whom I respect and whose work I love to see in the tags. Please do go and check out the other entries, they're all amazing! <3

[ficsideblogbecauseanxiety]

Starlings (Finished Vers.)

A few months ago I posted a WIP drabble that, at the time, I couldn’t be bothered to finish. Well, tonight I had a writing date with my girlfriend, so I did! To repeat, this is vaguely based off of a personal experience with the song Starlings by Elbow (sudden volume shift warning if you decide to search it; which I recommend as it’s a great song, and also this fic won’t really make sense without it).

Pairing: LawLu Rating: T, for cursing Setting: Modern AU Wordcount: 2023 words

The streetlights passed overhead one by one, each in an orange blur, as Law drove closer and closer to home. He knew they'd cross the outer limits of his hometown any minute now, and once they did it would only be a little while after that before they made it to his parents' house. He glanced over at Luffy in the passenger seat; he wasn't one for long car journeys with few stops, so he'd settled in for a nap a couple of hours ago. Law knew he'd have to wake him up soon. He grinned mischievously. 

As he braked at the next stoplight, he grabbed his phone from the dashboard, plugged it into the front console and selected a track before replacing back in its windshield stand. The song began quietly and calmly with soft, music box-esque tones, and it slowly grew to include muted percussion, dulcet vocals, and a gentle piano, until...

BARAAG!!

"Daah!! What the fuck!!!" Luffy shot awake at the sudden noise of an enthusiastic horn section blasting from the car speakers, his arms flailing about him and kicking his legs out in front of him. He grabbed his chair and sat up, eyes wide and breathing heavy with shock. He turned an angry glare on Law, who was desperately holding back laughter next to him.

Law swallowed his laughter and pressed a switch on his steering wheel to pause the song before it got to the second loud trumpeting. He breathed a satisfied sigh, turned his head briefly to look at Luffy and said, "Oh, Luffy, you're awake. Good, we're almost there."

"You son of a bitch." Luffy sat up properly in his chair again. He could hear Law snickering and give him a sideways glare. "I'm gonna tell your mom you did that."

"Please," Law scoffed, "She's my mother. She both birthed and raised me. She knows I'm an asshole." Stopping at another light, he leant forward and flicked back to his travel playlist. "Not that she would say as much, mind, but trust me. She knows."

Luffy's eyes were still narrowed at him from across the car. "Even if she didn't know, it wouldn't come as much of a surprise." With this Luffy crossed his arms and flung himself back against the seat, huffing. 

Law rolled his eyes and pulled away as the lights changed.

The rest of the drive to Law's childhood home was largely uneventful and deathly silent, save for the sound of the car engine. Damn if Luffy didn't hold a grudge when he was in a mood. Law felt maybe they were too alike on that front, but that's love for you. You can't just pick and choose. Not really.

They drove past retail parks and through many long suburban streets before pulling in front of what Luffy could only ever describe as a "big fucking house". It truly was a big fucking house; not quite what one would call a mansion, but still quite a sight to behold. Bigger than anywhere Luffy had ever lived, at least.

"Coming?" Law prompted, opening his car door, "Or are you just going to sulk in the car all weekend?"

Luffy withdrew eye contact with a huff and got out, making exaggerated movements as he stood up and slammed the door. He carried his own bag, thank you very much, and went ahead of Law to wait on the doorstep, pointedly facing the door. He leant away from Law's attempt to peck him on the head. Damn, he was being stubborn about this.

Law rang the bell and, predictably, as his mother came to answer it Luffy lit up again. Most people would say that Luffy was a terrible liar, and for the most part, they were right, but they were the people who had no clue about his mental health. Law knew better. Luffy was a shitty liar when it came to getting caught out for things he had done, sure, but he was an expert at covering up his low moods with a big, cheesy fake smile. He'd had a lifetime of practice with it, after all.

After exchanging the usual pleasantries with Law's parents they made their way upstairs to set their bags in his old room. The second he was over the threshold Luffy's smile dropped into a frown again; like an actor finishing a scene. He flung his bag down he lay back on the navy bedsheets and glared up at the ceiling.

Law watched him from the doorway and sighed. Sometimes he could just be so difficult. He started humming absentmindedly as he set down his own bag and closed the door behind him. He set to work getting the room ready for a proper stay - fixing the curtains and fishing the tv remote out of one of the multitudes of drawers in his admittedly inconvenient dresser - and as he did so he began to sing softly to himself. Perhaps subconsciously trying to lighten the mood.

"How dare the premier ignore my invitations-" He finally found the remote in the tenth drawer he checked - his dad liked to hide it between visits. "He'll have to go."

"Don't."

Law turned around at the sudden harsh utterance. "Hm?"

"It's that song from before. Don't."

Was it? Oh, yes, of course, it was. He hadn't realised. Law briefly considered cutting it out so as not to anger the beast further, but then he remembered that sometimes you've just got to turn into the spin.

"But you like my singing voice, usually." He smirked, turning back to the dresser to dig through the drawers for the remote for the DVD player.

"If you were singing anything else, it'd be okay. Just not that." Luffy's voice was still thick with stubborn annoyance.

"But it's a nice song, and I want to sing it." Playing 'poke the bear' with Luffy was a dangerous game, but Law would be lying if he said he didn't have a secret love for high stakes gambling.

He heard Luffy huff and turn over on the bed behind him. The gamble had paid off. For now. Law took this as a signal to continue with the song.

"So, too, the bunchy luncheons with its second on my list of things to do." His accent didn't fit especially well to the original Mancunian pronunciations, but he hoped the weird way it sounded would help lift Luffy's mood.

He made his way across the room to his bag, unzipping it and rooting around inside for his pyjamas.

"At the top is stopping by your place of work and acting like I haven't dreamed of you and I, and marriage in an orange grove."

He found them and made his way back across the room to set them down on the pillow on his side of the bed. He looked up at Luffy's figure, lying with his back to him, arms still crossed in front of him. He was all tensed up and rigid. Law smiled.

"You are the only thing in any room you're ever in." He sat himself down on the bed, too, facing towards the covered windows and away from Luffy for dramatic effect. "I'm stubborn, selfish, and too old."

"It's not gonna work."

Another utterance Law wasn't expecting. Luffy usually stuck to his guns more when it came to giving the silent treatment. Which meant that, actually, it must be working.

"I sat you down and told you how the truest love that's ever found-" He looked back at him out of the corner of his eye. "Is for oneself."

Luffy tightened the curl he was working himself into, and in his glance Law could see him clenching his shirt sleeves. He was pissing him off for sure, but it wouldn't be much longer now until it came full circle. He faced his eyes forward again for the next line.

"You pulled apart my theory with a weary and disinterested sigh."

At this point in the song when he had sung it to Luffy prior, he would sigh dramatically before chuckling to himself and revelling in his genius comedic timing. It never failed to make Law smile. Sometimes he would even laugh. Luffy was so, so good at making him laugh when he otherwise didn't feel like it.

Law thought he heard a sigh behind him, but if he did it was definitely not the usual jokey one. More of a real one, heavied with real irritation. Law let out a sigh himself and soldiered on. Not long now.

"So, yes, I guess I'm asking you to back a horse that's good for glue-" He stood up, stretching his back and turning around. "And nothing else."

Luffy's mass on the bed was curled up even more, now, but did seem to be softening a bit. Law folded his arms across his chest.

"But find a man that's truer than, find a man that needs you more than I."

Memories shone in his head of the expressions he had seen of Luffy's when he had previously sung this song. Soft eyes, soft smiles. His whole face radiating warmth and love. Law had sung feeling into these lines more than most songs he would croon around the apartment. It's one of the few songs he would serenade him with. Law was much pickier with those sorts of songs than Luffy was.

Law began making his way around the bed, fingers dragging lightly across the sheets.

"Sit with me a while and let me listen to you talk about-" He perched on Luffy's side of the bed, lightly tickling the soles of his feet, which he quickly retracted out of Law's reach with an annoyed grunt. "-Your dreams and your obsessions, I'll be quiet and confessional." 

He was projecting louder as the original song did, leaning over Luffy's huddled up form that was becoming ever more tightly coiled so as to avoid his touch. 

"The violets explode inside me when I meet your eyes-" He reached out towards Luffy's hair-cloaked face, nearly shouting the words at this point. "-Then I'm spinning and I'm diving like a cloud of starlings."

He gently moved the hair from across Luffy's eyes and as the music dissipated in his head he saw Luffy's averted gaze and deep blush spreading from his cheeks across his nose, as it always did when Law did cheesy stuff like this, though it was usually accompanied by a smile. The picture before him was too perfect as it was, though. He felt his heart quicken in his chest and a smile uncontrollably tugged at his lips.

"Darling is this love?"

The words fell, soft and low and sweet from his mouth. Luffy finally looked at him and pouted. He really was so irresistibly sweet when he was angry and flustered at the same ti-

"BWAAAAAARN!!"

Law toppled backwards, falling off the bed and nearly cracking his head of the big wooden bed knob. He sat there on the floor for several seconds in a state of mild shock as Luffy erupted with laughter on the bed above him. He shook it off and smiled up at him.

"You son of a bitch," Law chuckled, pulling himself off the floor, "That scared me half to death!"

"Well, you deserve it!" Luffy had tears in his eyes from laughing so hard. He had thrown himself right back onto the bed and was gripping his sides as he choked out his words through the throes of laughter. "Now we're even!!"

They both continued to laugh it off as Law pulled himself up onto the bed. He crawled his way over to his now incandescent boyfriend and as the mirth began to peter out they both lay beholding each other, breathing heavily and smiling wide. 

Law breathed an "I love you" and Luffy beamed in response before returning it.

Luffy was happy again, and all was right with the world.

But Law would be damned if he wasn't ever going to do it again. The reaction is always just too priceless, and Law was never one for learning lessons the easy way.

[ficsideblogbecauseanxiety]

100 Themes Challenge: 1 - Introduction

I’m gonna be doing a challenge on here for the foreseeable future to help better my writing/develop my style/challenge myself. I don’t know if they’ll all be lawlu, or even if they’ll all be one piece, but I know quite a few of them are gonna be set in my modern au to expand it. Speaking of, I’ve imagined this scene for their meeting many times over the years of daydreaming, but this is the first time I’ve written about it. I hope you enjoy! ^^

Pairing: Lawlu Rating: T, for cursing (thought it is in portuguese? idk) Setting: Modern AU Wordcount: 1,668 words

"Are you sure you're gonna be ok getting there by yourself?" Sabo asked, setting down a plate of slightly overcooked pancakes in front of Luffy. "I mean, you're still not great with your crutches."

"Pfft! I'm not a kid anymore, Sabo, I'll get there ok." Luffy grinned his signature sunshiney smile before stuffing an entire pancake into his mouth.

Sabo sighed. Luffy's sense of direction wasn't great, and he got confused taking public transport, so it was only natural for him to worry. However, they didn't exactly have much of a choice otherwise. Both he and Ace had to work, and it's not like they had access to a car to be able to drive him there. Luffy would just have to make his way to the hospital by himself.

Luffy had broken his leg a couple of weeks ago, before summer vacation had actually started. He and Zoro were scheduled for their math final, which neither of them felt was worth their time, so they had decided to play hooky instead. They had pinched Zoro's older sister's skateboard - something neither of them knew how to use - and taken it to the park to see if they could pull off some sick stunts. Long story short, they couldn't; and Luffy took a rather nasty fall down a flight of concrete stairs.

After Sabo and Ace had long since left for work, it came time for Luffy to leave. He loaded up Google Maps on his phone, hobbled over to his crutches, and set out for the hospital. It wasn't too far by bus, but Luffy had a habit of zoning out on public transport and missing his stop, so he had to keep his wits about him. Against all odds, he remembered to get off at his stop.

This was all going so well! What had Ace and Sabo even been so concerned about?

Luffy crutched his way into the hospital reception, told the nurse he was here (he'd even remembered to write down his doctor's name!), and waited his turn to be called. This was all so easy. Who said adulting was supposed to be hard?

"Mr Monkey?" the nurse finally called. Luffy looked up from his phone and smiled at her. "Dr Thompson will see you now. Room thirty four."

Luffy nodded and got up, grabbing his crutches. Right. Easy. Room... Uh. 

"Sorry, which room?" Luffy asked, a little embarrassed.

The nurse smiled patiently. "Thirty four."

"Thanks!" Luffy returned the smile and started hopping down the corridor.

Luffy didn't have a head for numbers. As if his short-term memory wasn't bad enough, it was even worse for numbers, especially in English. He could kinda handle Portuguese numbers, but even those blurred in his mind if he didn't listen well enough. It didn't usually matter, but stuff like this was when it got a bit annoying.

He looked up and followed the room numbers as he went. 

'17... 18... 19... 20...' Turn the corner. '21... 22... Wait.' Luffy stopped. 'What room was it supposed to be again?' 

He cursed silently under his breath before turning back the way he came, except the reception and the nice nurse were nowhere in sight. He wasn't even sure which corners he'd turned. He was lost.

"Merda." he swore again, audibly this time. He looked around, eyes scanning for anyone who would be able to help him, but all he could see were patients hobbling around attached to IV drips, and nurses rushing around with charts. He supposed he could have asked a nurse, but they all looked so busy he'd feel bad interrupting them. For all he knew someone's life might hang in the balance. Nurses do important work!

He stood awkwardly in the hallway glancing around before carrying on regardless. It's only a matter of time until he either remembers what room he's supposed to go to, or he finds someone who could help him. And no-one will assume anything if he just keeps going. If he just keeps going. Just keeps- 

"Woah!!"

Suddently his right crutch slides out from under him, out of his hand, and waaaaay down the corridor. He stared helplessly after it, hand still outstretched before letting it fall dejectedly to his side. He leaned his weight heavily on his remaining crutch and tried to shift to be able to move, but the floor under his sneaker was sodden and slippery and he could feel that if he tried to shift his weight too much he'd be over and in a LOT of pain.

He was stuck.

He looked around for help, but it was almost like he'd wandered into some kind of pocket dimension inside the hospital where literally no-one needed to be, because the place was utterly deserted. 

"Uhh... Help?" he called out, but nobody came. "Help?" Still no answer. "Help!" Silence. "Help!!" He swung his head around and almost fell backwards when he came face to chest with someone who had snuck up behind him.

"Whoa there."

The stranger held Luffy's shoulders and steadied him, stopping him from falling flat on his butt. Luffy looked up to get a look at his face. It was a nice face; soft, brown skin, flecked with paler areas in a pleasant mosaic; thick, black hair atop his head, as well as a flash on his chin; and the most unusually coloured eyes that Luffy couldn't help but notice, like a mix of gold and grey.

He looked... so... cool!!

Luffy stared, mouth slightly agape, at the stranger for a few moments, only catching himself when he spoke again.

"Are you okay?" he asked, though he didn't seem especially fussed as to Luffy's answer.

"Huh? Uhh," Luffy stammered, "Yeah, I'm fine."

The cool-looking stranger furrowed his brow at him.

"Then why were you calling for help?"

"Huh? Help?" All at once Luffy returned to his senses and he remembered where he was and what he was doing. "Oh yeah! I lost my crutch and also now my foot's all wet."

Luffy turned and gestured to his crutch on the floor down the hallway. The stranger nodded and went to pick it up. Luffy watched him closely so as to get a better look at him. He was a good half a foot taller than Luffy, and he was wearing pale green scrubs - Luffy surmised that he must work somewhere in the hospital, though God knows he wouldn't know where - and had black, tribal-like tattoos on his hands and forearms, and Luffy could see more peeking out from under his sleeve. Luffy didn't know doctors were even allowed to have tattoos.

'Cool...' Luffy thought, as the stranger brought his crutch back over to him. He took it gratefully and steadied himself between the two of them again.

"You'd think that for such a good hospital they'd be able to afford decent janitorial staff," the stranger commented, haughtily, "Not much of a hospital if people leave with more broken bones than they come in with."

He seemed a little full of himself and proud of his opinions, but Luffy thought that that was pretty fair if he was already a doctor at such a young age. Come to think of it, he didn't half seem young; mid-20s at the latest. Was he a doctor?

"Do you need anything else?" he asked, though Luffy was pretty sure from his tone that he wanted him to say no. He was a little sorry to disappoint.

"Yeah, actually, I'm a little lost. I'm looking for..." Luffy dug his phone out of his pocket and quickly scrolled through his notes for his doctor's name. "Doctor... Thompson...?"

"Well," the stranger glanced at the name on the screen and rubbed the back of his neck. "I'm sorry, but I don't actually work here. Yet. I'm just a med student, so I don't really know where all the doctors' rooms are."

"Oh." Well, that explained why he looked too young to be a doctor, at least.

"I can take you to a nurses' station though, if you'd like."

Luffy perked up again. "Really? Thanks! Sorry if I'm taking you away from, like, med studenting."

"Nah," the stranger shrugged, "We were just doing surgical rounds anyway. It's just like a pop quiz. Kinda boring, actually. Anyway, come on, it's this way."

The stranger walked ahead of him, leading the way to the nearest nurses' station. He seemed a bit full of himself, Luffy thought, but he must be a good guy if he's willing to go out of his way to help him like this. He knew from previous experience that doctors weren't all necessarily good people, but this guy struck Luffy as someone with a good heart. Luffy smiled as he trailed haltingly after him.

"What's your name, by the way?" Luffy finally asked. This must have been the longest he's ever talked to someone without asking their name. "Mine's Luffy."

The stranger turned back to look at him, a little surprised by the unnecessary introduction. He answered nonetheless, "Law."

'Wow.' Luffy thought, 'Even his name is cool.'

This was definitely someone he wanted to get to know better. He had decided. This guy was gonna be his friend. Maybe not today, as Luffy was already running late to his appointment, and Law would have to go back to his "rounds", much as it seemed to pain him to; but Luffy definitely wanted to talk to him more.

They chatted casually on the way to the nurses' station before parting ways. A nurse helped Luffy to his appointment, and the rest of the day passed by as usual; he caught the bus home, missed his stop, walked from the wrong stop all the way back, got chided by his brothers when they got home, ate, and went to bed. All the while though he couldn't get this guy out of his head. Everything about him just seemed so cool!

He couldn't wait to see him again. And he knew he would.

[ficsideblogbecauseanxiety]

📽📽📽 [for those on pc: those are three projector emojis, because this is me projecting, hard.] yh this is something I wrote based on something that happened to me a lot when I was depressed. Not so much anymore, but it happened again recently, so I decided to write this. (Note: when I was depressed, I often daydreamed about my modern one piece au, in which I made Luffy depressed to cope, so yeah. Modern AU, and Depressed!Luffy) 

Pairing: LawLu Rating: T, for cursing Setting: Modern AU Wordcount: 596 words Content warning: depictions of depression and self-deprecation, based on past personal experiences of the author

Luffy awoke suddenly. Pulse racing. Chest tight. His head feeling like absolute shit. Dread weighed heavy in his core, and for the first few seconds of consciousness in the inky darkness he felt cut-off, isolated, and utterly alone.

Then something - or rather someone - stirred. Beside him in their shared bed, Law readjusted himself in his sleep, and all at once Luffy’s fogged senses cleared.

He could see the dim flash of his 3DS’ charging light over on the chest of drawers across from him. He could hear the quiet breaths of his sleeping boyfriend. He could feel Law’s body heat, and the pressure of him pulling against the sheets. His chest still felt tight, and his stomach heavy, but his head felt a lot more grounded.

He sighed and groaned quietly. What time even was it? Like, 3am? 4am? He lifted himself up to lean on his elbows and reached over to check the time on his phone, bathing his face in relatively bright light. Blinking against the sudden brightness he made out the time.

00:32.

“What!? I’ve only been asleep for like 40 minutes!?” he whispered angrily to himself. Luckily Law didn’t wake, and Luffy flung his head back on the pillow and grumbled in frustration.

His brain had been pulling this same stunt quite often in recent months. He would fall asleep for anywhere from 30 minutes to an hour, then wake up feeling like crap. It passed quickly enough, but it was still enough to piss him off. Sometimes it even left him feeling off for the remainder of the day if he didn’t have a pick-me-up.

He could feel the heavy doubt and dread welling up inside him again. It was a feeling of utter hopelessness. It felt like everything was for nothing. Like all of his efforts were for nought. He was alone in this world, and what’s more, he deserved to be. What had he even done with his time on Earth? And what was even going to do? What!? WHAT!??

However, before he could white water raft any further down that stream of thought, Law rolled over and wrapped his arm around him, hugging him close. Luffy could feel his breath blow down the back of his neck, which was almost relaxing. He heard Law shifting behind him before breathy words alighted in his ears.

“You woke me up with your complaining and then I heard you whimpering. Are you okay?”

Luffy relaxed into Law’s embrace. His brain still felt muddy and his stomach still ached, but at least Law kept the menacing thoughts at bay. He always could.

“Nah, it’s nothing. Just one of those, like, despair naps.” he replied.

Law hugged him tighter.

“Poor you. Do you need me to get you anything?”

“Nah, it’s ‘kay. I’ll just get myself a glass of water. I feel like I need to get up anyway.”

“Okay.” Law loosened his grasp on Luffy, allowing him to get up. “Don’t be too long, though.” Luffy grabbed his phone to light the way, and in the dim light Law opened one eye and smirked up at him. “I can’t sleep without holding onto a motherfucker.”

Luffy rolled his eyes at Law’s outdated webcomic meme, but couldn’t help but smile. Why had he even shown him that crappy comic anyway? As he wandered through to the kitchen Luffy reaffirmed to himself two things that he already knew.

1. Depression is a bitch that really fucks with your head, and 2. Having Law there with him made things just so much easier.

author’s final note: the meme is from homestuck fandom past. its an old old joke, but again, this modern au was my daydream coping mechanism back in 2012-16 (after which is was just my go-to for daydreaming anyway  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯) so of course i made them homestuck memers, since im one... btw expect homestuck aus from me in the future.

[ficsideblogbecauseanxiety]

A brief drabble about Law questioning his feelings. I wrote this about 4-5 months ago after musing about it on the train home from school.

Pairing: LawLu (or at least Law>Lu) Rating: K+ Setting: Canonverse Wordcount: 594 words

There were times – and he cursed his gay heart for this – when Law found himself romanticising Luffy.

Building up this image in his mind of this great saviour. This amazing man who burst into his life like a rogue firework and who would burn the world down for him if it threatened him.

This was all preposterous, of course.

Luffy simply wasn’t that type of person, and Law was well aware of that fact. Logically-speaking.

But of course, when has love ever followed the ways of logic?

Logically, Law knew Luffy to be a loud-mouthed, impulsive idiot, whose allegiances seemed to change based on who has the most food to hand, or who promises to be his friend. Logically, Law knew Luffy was kind of gross, and unkempt, and almost always a little sweaty, as he reportedly didn’t bathe often. On top of all that, of course, was that the smell of hot rubber always hung around, and was a bit noxious.

However, none of these cold hard facts helped him late at night, when he lay in bed reminiscing, staring at the wanted poster above his desk. Neither did they help him when the newspapers came, and brought new tales of the Straw Hats’ daring do. They especially hadn’t helped during those rare quiet, intimate moments with the man himself; when they stayed up all night talking of dreams and adventures and the future.

Those times were when Law fell the hardest. Which was foolish, he thought, because Straw Hat wasn’t even like that most of the time. Most of the time he was loud, excitable, and really just down right annoying. And yet, at times even these traits of his were oddly captivating.

His hot-headed impulsive nature, once any emergency had passed, was almost amusing in hindsight. His excitability and excessive volume were endearing to say the least, especially when it was barely restrained in an attempt to look professional. Not forgetting, of course, that he could also have a serious side, and when that came out it made Law’s heart race.

What made all of this even harder was that Luffy seemed besotted with him. Always trying to spend time together; always invading his personal space; always chattering excitedly to him about nothing; always getting his face a bit too close before pulling away; always placing his hands anywhere a bit too long to take back, but doing so anyway. Law always meant to ask about that, but he had a feeling he wouldn’t like the answer.

Luffy, ultimately, didn’t seem the type to feel that way about anyone. Romantic feelings – or at least the realisation of such – required at least some manner of introspection, Law thought, and that was something that seemed pretty beyond Straw Hat. Even if he felt some inkling of ‘like’, he probably wouldn’t dwell long enough for it to consume him. Too much to do, in so little time as one has when they live as fast as him. Too little time to bother separating romantic from platonic.

All of this was just a fool’s game. Why did Law even feel this way? What was the point? Luffy already loved him as much as he was going to – as much as he loves all his friends – so why dwell so much? Why waste so much time? So much emotional energy?

If you ever find answers to any of those questions, I’m sure Surgeon of Death, Trafalgar D. Water Law would love to hear from you. Lord knows he’s never been able to figure it out himself.