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Behind the scenes pic of me in my true form …

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the idealized version of my tomorrow self will fix this

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Hades offering them something to eat literally killed me. Hades is like "the smart one's gone" and immediately tried to keep them there forever.

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Fastner & Larson - You'll Get Used To It

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small comp of random and funny twosentencehorror (and 2sentence2horror) posts

i have others but don't feel like sifting through 500+ files for them right now

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already october. that'd freak me out if any year since 2019 had been real. luckily they haven't

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albatrosses will wipe the floor with any species of bird you choose to compare them to. they’re the Most, or at least Extremely, by almost every metric

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The dude who built my childhood home died there in the 90s and then his widow let my parents buy it cheap because she liked my mom and also wanted to get the hell out of there. She left most of her husband’s stuff in the house when she left and that was, I shit you not, roughly 200 hand carved decoy ducks, all of his decoy duck carving materials in his shop, several dozen books on antique duck decoys and around 50 high quality full color books on American made muskets and rifles of the 19th century. His son is apparently a renowned Star Wars prequel trilogy memorabilia collector. Really glad he’s carrying on his dad’s legacy of obsessively perusing his hobbies to the detriment of his marriage.

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My dealer: got some straight gas 🔥😛 this strain is called "All We Are is Bullets" 😳 you'll be zonked out of your gourd 💯

Me: yeah whatever. I don't feel shit.

5 minutes later: dude I swear I have to slay the souls of 1,000 evil men

My buddy Gerard pacing: the devil is lying to us

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just had the worst thought ever. wwhat if the new mcr song sucks

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college-aged obama portraying himself as bisexual in an effort to attract artsy girls is the funniest thing i’ve read all week

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He shredded for our sins

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Ruben Pang (Singaporean, b. 1990)

The joyous necessity, 2022

Oil, alkyd and dammar varnish on aluminum composite panel

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3 gummies at the pond incident beauty of the world increaced 1000x

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